10/10

CERTIFIED KINO

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Certified garbage on par with M3gan or that shitty live action Death Note.

    Can't believe you zoomers will stomach this kind of bland crap.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Don't care
      RECORD BOX OFFICE PROFITS BABY!

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Haven't seen this but M3gan was great and only contrarians on Cinemaphile didn't like it, so you're not helping your case.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      joyless sack of lard detected

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      M3gan was based

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Agreed

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Both M3gan and FNAF are good movies in different.ways

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It's a good movie and unquestionably an astounding box office hit:
    >projected to gross around $50 million from 3,550 theaters in its opening weekend.[2]The film made $10.3 million from Thursday night previews, the biggest-ever for a film with a simultaneous streaming release.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      That means making 250% of its budget (USD 20 mil) in three days btw

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        They've already said that the Peacock deal made it break even already, so this is just all pure profit.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Exactly. At least 2 sequels are already a certainty. And critics have shown once again how out of touch-- if not deliberately dishonest-- they are

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Out of touch food critics have slated McDonalds food despite it making record profits

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Have they? Honest critics just rate fast-food within fast-food parameters unlike movie critics who see the absence of esg/diversity hiring nonsense as a motive to be unfairly harsh. But FNAF shows less and less ppl trust critics

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It sucks, it tries too hard to be LE SERIOUS TIMELIFE DRAMA BUT ALSO LE GAME LORE, Wily's Wonderland did it better because it knows the premise of ghost animatronics is fucking stupid and decided to have fun with it.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Video game movies can’t stop winning

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      it was okay pretty much what I expected from a 5 nights at Freddy's movie and definitely better than that low budget nic cage one

      yeah gran turismo was pretty solid too

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    A film making money means it's "le good"?

    /tv/... you've changed

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Every movie is bombing nowadays, unlike prepandemic where even the stupidest, shittiest movie cleared 700m WW. Making money is back to being a good metric.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Cinemaphile... you've changed

      Not really, Cinemaphile is first and foremost chinless contrarians escaped from /misc/. So if le evil DA JOOOOOOOOS at Rottentomatoes say the movie stinks, their contrarianism kicks in and they start saying it's the greatest movie ever.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I simply enjoyed the movie for what it is, not a masterpiece but fun with excellent production values

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      There's actual responses to this post of anons saying
      >yes making money means a film is good
      These same retards shit on The Avengers
      Lol u can't make this shit up

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It's got good audience ratings too. People are liking the movie.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yes, a movie is really good if the audience likes it but critics don't.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >FNAF 20%
    >Megan 80%
    Just ignore critics in general and judge by yourself.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I unironically soijaked in the theater when MatPat came on screen

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >when MatPat came on screen

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Oh yeah I forgot he showed on screen too

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I soijacked a few times:
      "I ALWAYS COME BACK"
      Ella springlock costume
      Sparky/Fetch costume

      I love FNAF so much

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >when MatPat came on screen

      Oh yeah I forgot he showed on screen too

      Funny how that one black youtuber made multiple cameos and nobody even talks about him.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It would have been better if they didn't show it during the trailers. Cory's fantastic, in fact he's one of my favorite youtubers. I think Matt is just so tied to FNAF in particular that it was especially surprising and funny to see him in the movie.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    They could have easily made scary horror with the premise of FNAF. Souless robots are scary, just like the terminator. But they decided that making 3+ bullshit is better for the merchandise and attraction if toddlers. Sad

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Is asleep for half the movie

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It kinda makes sense, they wanted to bring the fnaf minigames to the movie and they did it through his dreams which was a good idea

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    the first half was nice. it wasnt scary but I liked the campy horror feel and it was what I was expecting of it. the second half went to shit with the whole plot but it wasnt unbearable. its good if you played the games when you were younger and want to spend a night with friends but dont know what to do.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Them going 100% practical for the animatronics was perfect, I imagine they each cost a small fortune though

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It was worth it since they made their money back anyway and then some

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      animatronics are cheaper than cgi

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Maybe in 1990

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i watch it for she

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    heard statement

    >FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S MEANS ALSO FIVE DAYS SOMEWHERE ELSE, AND THEY COULD NOT THINK OF ANYTHING GOOD FOR THAT
    >THE MOVIE COULD BE 1 HOUR SHORTER
    >its 1h45m

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It was extremely mediocre.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The only people here defending this are zoomers or people that are politically obsessed and will say it's good cause the creator is right leaning. I'm a rightoid myself but letting politics be rent free in your head to that extent is pathetic, it was nice the movie was all white people but aside from that, and the set design / lack of CGI it was garbage.

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Watched it last night, I’d give it a 5/10.
    The critics are right that it would honestly benefit from an R rating. The fact that all of the deaths are offscreen is tragic, and the MC’s acting is just… sleepy. It’s a pretty damn safe film, which is what most video game movies are, and the last 20 or so minutes was better.

    Needed more William Afton.
    Needed more gore.
    Probably needed a shorter plot line for the MC, I really didn’t care for the dream sequences and the MC’s relationship with his sister.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Aunt subplot
    >goes nowhere only serves as a mcguffin to get him to work there
    >kills her off offscreen in the beginning of the 3rd act and it’s never touched on again despite dying in his house
    Max and the bad guys breaking into Freddy’s
    >they all get brutally murdered
    >never touched upon again
    Afton for some reason hiring people to guard Freddy’s
    The dream subplot doesn’t do anything but soak runtime and introduce an anime fight between the kids and protag
    >playing around with the animatronics which just takes all the suspense out of the movie
    >leaving your little sister with murder robots for even a second just so you can flirt

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Afton for some reason hiring people to guard Freddy’s
      Rewatch the movie and watch Aftons face when he reads Mikes last name. He instantly remembers that he killed his brother and wants to kill him too. As to why he would hire people other than Mike is to just kill people he doesn't like, he's a mentally ill serial killer.
      Playing around with the animatronics show that the robots are just 5 year old kids stuck in purgatory, neither in hell or heaven just stuck somewhere. He already left his little sister alone with the robots when she was getting tickled by them.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Wait, the animatronics were practical effects?
    Holy kino. I didnt realise and assumed they were CGI.
    That makes the film 10x better than I had thought it was (and I enoyed it).

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yes, this movie actually has animatronics + suits.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah they did an amazing job with the animatronics. They had a suit version for some specific scenes, but otherwise was all animatronics. At the 6:45 minute mark here you can see them behind the scenes:

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Yup im thinking kino

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Vanessa 100% works with her dad, when she's about to get stabbed Afton says that she had only one job. I'm guessing she is the one that covers up the murders that happen with the security guards, they don't leave, they get killed.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah no shit. Wouldn’t surprise me if she is stuck in one of the suits in movie two while in a coma

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I feel like we're going to see her in the Vanny suit and fully developed Springtrap only in the third movie. Second one is going to be a prequel with fnaf 2 and showing the bite of 87, or maybe the first pizzeria that was opened by Henry and Afton and how he became a serial killer.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah no shit. Wouldn’t surprise me if she is stuck in one of the suits in movie two while in a coma

      You can see the Vanny suit in the opening with the drawings too.

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    just looked up the game for this and it’s bad. just looking left and right and then at your security cameras for 10 minutes a night. pretty boring

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      the original game is super simple but builds tension so effectively that the jump scare will get you ever time
      can't comment on any of the other games

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      the original game is super simple but builds tension so effectively that the jump scare will get you ever time
      can't comment on any of the other games

      It was a simple yet compelling concept I think it would’ve worked best as a horror short with a little less story; also I thought spring trap was the scariest character in the series personally so I’ve always like 3 the best

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        here you go

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Why is everyone asking for more gore and violence when it was never that way in the games? If you were into the source material you knew good and well you weren't going to get anything explicit since it was always more about tell, don't show.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      because they watched the VHS fan-made tapes and thought that's FNAF

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