Dear Gandalf, I wrote you, but you still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not've got 'em
There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin'
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
But anyways, frick it, what's been up, man? How's your Bilbo?
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I'ma call her?
I'ma name her Bilbo!
May I have your attention, please?
May I have your attention, please?
Will the real Slim Sauron please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Sauron please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here?
Y'all act like you never seen a black Hobbit before
Jaws all on the floor like Arwen, like Aragorn just burst through a circular door
And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwin' her over elven furniture (ah!)
It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just slay who I think he did, did he?
And Elendil said-, nothing you idiots
Elendil's dead, forgot to block my mace hit (haha)
May I have your attention, please?
May I have your attention, please?
Will the real Slim Sauron please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Sauron please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here?
Y'all act like you never seen a black Hobbit before
Jaws all on the floor like Arwen, like Aragorn just burst through a circular door
And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwin' her over elven furniture (ah!)
It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just slay who I think he did, did he?
And Elendil said-, nothing you idiots
Elendil's dead, forgot to block my mace hit (haha)
>Dear Mr. I’m too good to respect the lore >This will be the last package I ever buy from your ass. >It's been six months and still no full trailer, I don't deserve it? >I know you got the source material, Tolkien wrote em perfect.
Exactly, I look like a school shooter yet I’ve never committed a crime in my life, well besides
>urinating in public >public intoxication >tax fraud >having unprotected sex with a unmarried Arab woman (I’m fairly sure this is some sort of crime in the Australian Caliphate) >drunkly screaming Black person at 2:00 am in Sandybay >more public intoxication
>Tolkien fan, have read nearly all of his work except for whatever Christopher published back in 2016 or whatever >watch the trailer >literally have no idea who the blonde person is meant to be, assume it's an OC >find out it's fricking SAURON
How am I a shill in trying to stop critics of the show from being moronic? There is plenty to criticise about the show, including the character in OP, but that is not Sauron.
>This face is the coomer shill's main argument for watching rangs of power
She's just being used to market the show in general
It's not the coomer/waifugays putting her on the side of 20 story buildings
>She's just being used to market the show in general
Well yeah. Since she has a leading role in the series, her face will be all over the ads. However, she is nothing special but coomers fell for it and do the advertiser's work here for free
>Tolkien fan, have read nearly all of his work except for whatever Christopher published back in 2016 or whatever >watch the trailer >literally have no idea who the blonde person is meant to be, assume it's an OC >find out it's fricking SAURON
...it's not Sauron. It's one of Morgoth's servants. The character in OP is played by a female actress. I've posted it elsewhere, but I don't think they'll even show Sauron in the first season, and all the various characters are red herrings.
>Dear Mr. I’m too good to respect the lore >This will be the last package I ever buy from your ass. >It's been six months and still no full trailer, I don't deserve it? >I know you got the source material, Tolkien wrote em perfect.
His palms are sweaty
Knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs
But he keeps on forgetting what he wrote down
I've created a ring-a
cause nobody wants to see Melkor no more
he's chopped lembas
well if ya want lembas this is what i'll give ya
a little bit of elven weed mixed with some hard liquor
>thousands of little kids all over the world publicly chewing on every little bit of new information about your product >day by day, month by month >they do it for free
What a time to be a capitalist, I guess.
>*real slim shady intro starts playing*
Look
If you had
One shot
Or one opportunity
To forge every ring of power you ever wanted
In one moment
Would you capture it
Or just let it slip?
Jesus Christ, the shadow of reddit has spread so far in such a short time. This board is fricked.
How was that anon's post reddit you seething troglodyte
what reddit has to do with anything you dumb homosexual?
redditors breathe air too, does breathing air makes it reddit?
>the shadow of reddit
projection.exe
Shoo
whats up with everyone saying this guy is eminem mem
Because he looks like eminem
You see, zoomer, Marshall Mathers was a young, platinum blonde wigger with something to prove, once upon a time.
You see zoomer, Marshall Mathers was a young, Zionist plant with adrenchrome to harvest, once upon a time
lol this makes the original look even more like an edgy teen pretending to be eminem
he also looks like that little wigger from like 6 or 7 years back, can't think of his name
There will be lots of shills pushing this shit show here when it starts and I will still not watch it.
>blonde, blue eyed men are evil
Oy vey
he look like he bouta finna rite nao
This is a based and good design for angelic Sauron, the dude has a good face for the part, and you literally cannot prove me wrong
I hope you fall down an open manhole.
Dear Gandalf, I wrote you, but you still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not've got 'em
There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin'
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
But anyways, frick it, what's been up, man? How's your Bilbo?
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I'ma call her?
I'ma name her Bilbo!
May I have your attention, please?
May I have your attention, please?
Will the real Slim Sauron please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Sauron please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here?
Y'all act like you never seen a black Hobbit before
Jaws all on the floor like Arwen, like Aragorn just burst through a circular door
And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwin' her over elven furniture (ah!)
It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just slay who I think he did, did he?
And Elendil said-, nothing you idiots
Elendil's dead, forgot to block my mace hit (haha)
>I AM HUWHITE AS FRICK RAWR
I guess we now know what happened to all the black and latinx elves and hobbits.
>latino
it's latinx, sweetie.
>latino
latinx, you dumb Hispanic.
>latino
He's a good pick for Sauron (kind of like Satan) but I want to see who plays Melkor/Morgoth.
Eminem is Sauron. Hallbrand is.
Should have long hair. Why so many shorhaired men in the movie?
y'all act like you never seen a white person before
No senor i am estados unidos
He looks more like an angsty 2000's teenager than the most trusted lieutenant of Morgoth.
>will the real slim shady please stand up?
>make him look obviously evil
>Everyone trusts him
>obviously evil
Just because he looks like a stereotypical school shooter doesn't mean he's evil
Exactly, I look like a school shooter yet I’ve never committed a crime in my life, well besides
>urinating in public
>public intoxication
>tax fraud
>having unprotected sex with a unmarried Arab woman (I’m fairly sure this is some sort of crime in the Australian Caliphate)
>drunkly screaming Black person at 2:00 am in Sandybay
>more public intoxication
Wasn't the original sauron supposed to be beautiful and that is why he was able to fool the elves into helping him forge the rings?
Yes, he should be very charismatic and kind looking individual, someone who radiates beauty and goodness.
Yes, but OP's pic isn't Sauron.
It's not Sauron!
Hi, Shill.
How am I a shill in trying to stop critics of the show from being moronic? There is plenty to criticise about the show, including the character in OP, but that is not Sauron.
They're probably going to make him a conspiracy theorist too. He'll be an Elf-COVID denier or some such.
I want to FRICK the hammerhead shark!
JAWSOME
waiting for a LOTR themed Without Me
>latinozor rex 9000
Stan soundtrack in the background
Shill thread yet again logic
>let's shit on it people will like it then
>most evil being is a blue eyed white with blonde hair
>the hero is a Black person and moral
lole
Black folk aren't the most evil. They're just the most savage. Whites/Jews will systematically poison, rape, mkultra, murder, and enslave people.
did he eat apple as reward
He tortured a dog and two kittens to death.
But not out of spite and anger.
He held a dinner party
Not really, we just do it better
Another thing succesfully subverted. The israelites want Europeans to die.
>blonde hair
nobody has that shade of blonde hair IRL, you delusional mutt golem
>We don't want more Black folk
>ok, here is a pale white with blue eyes
>we don't want that either
You chuds are never happy
>hamfisted Black folk co-opting white characters
>is the same as
>every villain in every show is the whitest white man possible
You’re stupid
>If you could have any celebrity make a cameo in middle earth who would you pick?
>I think Hunter Schafer would be a wonderful elf
I kekked
I was 100% sure you were meming, but I looked up that video anyways.. ffs
>100% sure you were meming
She probably browses Cinemaphile
>This face is the coomer shill's main argument for watching rangs of power
I pity those sex starved zombies
>This face is the coomer shill's main argument for watching rangs of power
She's just being used to market the show in general
It's not the coomer/waifugays putting her on the side of 20 story buildings
>She's just being used to market the show in general
Well yeah. Since she has a leading role in the series, her face will be all over the ads. However, she is nothing special but coomers fell for it and do the advertiser's work here for free
Are you fricking serious?
Did amazon out-netflix, netflix, in their PR leading up to
>”More Amazing and Not Subhuman Black folk PLUS Magic” *the movie
?
Is this the extremely attractive and charismatic Sauron everyone's talking about?
looks like the guy who scares normies in school hallways lol, someone post it
>Tolkien fan, have read nearly all of his work except for whatever Christopher published back in 2016 or whatever
>watch the trailer
>literally have no idea who the blonde person is meant to be, assume it's an OC
>find out it's fricking SAURON
I shat bricks
...it's not Sauron. It's one of Morgoth's servants. The character in OP is played by a female actress. I've posted it elsewhere, but I don't think they'll even show Sauron in the first season, and all the various characters are red herrings.
that's not a female hairline
Apparently it's just Melkor cultist
MOM SAID IT'S MY TURN TO USE THE ONE RING NOW!
>Dear Mr. I’m too good to respect the lore
>This will be the last package I ever buy from your ass.
>It's been six months and still no full trailer, I don't deserve it?
>I know you got the source material, Tolkien wrote em perfect.
His palms are sweaty
Knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs
But he keeps on forgetting what he wrote down
One Ring
I dont know why
It doesnt even matter how far your eagles fly
weird fap
Guess who's back, back again
Sauron's back, tell a friend
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back?
I've created a ring-a
cause nobody wants to see Melkor no more
he's chopped lembas
well if ya want lembas this is what i'll give ya
a little bit of elven weed mixed with some hard liquor
>vomit on his sweater already
>morgoths spaghetti
>thousands of little kids all over the world publicly chewing on every little bit of new information about your product
>day by day, month by month
>they do it for free
What a time to be a capitalist, I guess.
Gandalf don't gotta use necromancy in his magic to win battles
Well, I do, so frick him and frick you too