Sounds like an excuse of a bitch who needs to submit to a stronger more aggressive man and bully the ones he orders them to
Seen those homosexuals way too many times, are you one?
Because it's a psyop to excuse white male actors from the scene of the MCU.
Before you mention Black Panther, the girl they replaced Wakanda with is a transgender with linebacker shoulders.
think about it. he was on his back and the plow drove over his legs and torso. what's located between the legs and the torso? or rather, what WAS located there? you really believe that these murderblades that obliterated his legs and pulverized the ribcage did no damage to the infinitely more fragile dick and balls? all that shit popped instantly like an overripe cherry, not even enough material left to consider any kind of reconstruction. just fucking gone
yeah kinda, but on the other hand its a real possibility he lost his dick, the plow really did a number on him and its not like thats something hed ever disclose to the world.
i bet if a woman #metoo's him he will settle out of court rather than expose his dick's inability to extract pleasure to the world.
I don't mind open sourcing this tactic on someone who works for disney.
You don't need a penis to get MeeToo'd you fucking virgin. They can also MeeToo you for things like farting on her boobies or fingerbanging her asshole, she just pretends it is "Unwanted Sexual Advancement" and the entire universe is her oyster
Fuck, my ex basically wanted to metoo some autistic kid who came into her work and asked her on a date. He hung around near the front door for five minutes working up the courage to ask if he she wanted to get dinner sometime and she refused and he said okay and left, then she came home acting as if he literally held her down and raped her or something. I said I appreciated the guy's courage and she got mad at me. Fuck that woman was a cunt.
>guys, why are you obsessing so much about my, i mean HIS penis, which by the way was absolutely NOT eaten by a badger. that never happened and also it was a fox
The itsy bitsy penis was ripped off by the treads
Down came the first blade, and it ripped off the head
By the second blade both shaft and balls were gone
Then Jeremy Renner's penis was strewn across the lawn
The fuck was this cunt dancing around in front of a snow plough with his dick out anyway?
He only has himself to blame. He was probably high on marijuanas, you know what these Hollywood actors are like.
I am officially declaring a moratorium on laughter in this thread. There is NOTHING funny about Jeremy Renner’s severed hog flopping around like a trout as it careens and spins back and forth around the ice skating rink
The plan today was move the snow away
But now I'm under... a heavy plow
By the way, I have to say
My penis... is no mo'
Squirrels and birds are eating bits of me
The bottom line is, I got plow'd
The media rushed to the scene and got there just in time to see the his dick get ripped off and fly at the camera. And then the media said his dick was just ripped off and there was a little news ticker at the bottom of the screen that said Hawkeyes dick is gone.
>All I can say is I’m happy to be walking again. I thought for a while I would never walk, and it broke me mentally. I was so devastated. I didn’t care about anything else. The mangled cock? I didn’t give a shit, I just wanted to walk again. So I kept working harder and harder with my physical therapy, and finally after months of hard work, I can walk again without any assistance. It’s still difficult, but I am overjoyed that I can walk. Just know this isn’t the end of the journey for me, I will keep improving. I will train harder, I will walk further, I will have the cock surgically re-attached. This is only the beginning of this story.
>Jeremy there's something we have to tell you... >we had to use your cocktail meat to repair your knees >*cockney accent* bloody ell doc how could you do dhis to me bruv
He's still able to direct!
not his urine stream... he can no longer direct that
Is a transplant possible?? He could get a BBC
>books an operation
>operation day come
>there's only asian options
>”Jeremy, it’s time to meet your donor”
>”KONICHIWA, DUDE!”
Kek
How mangled was it? They re attached the Bobbit guys dick and that was 30 years ago.
His was just cut cleanly, so a frankensdick operation was possible. Renner's was completely torn apart, there's nothing to stitch back.
reattach what? it would be like trying to reattach a peach back to the peach tree after you already turned it into jam
Disney actors suffering? Exquisite.
Shaft status?
broken
Shafted
off piste and pissed off
what exactly are you laughing at here and why
He lost his penis in an accident with a snow plough
and this is funny because?
Disney's actors who help them make money are complicit in every morally shitty thing the company does.
now he only has to declare himself divorced from mankind on paper and you have to call him Jemima Renner
We laugh at others' misfortune to keep the existential horror at bay. If you can't handle it, you should probably fuck off back to tarddit.
Sounds like an excuse of a bitch who needs to submit to a stronger more aggressive man and bully the ones he orders them to
Seen those homosexuals way too many times, are you one?
you might stop seeing oh so many of those homosexuals if you could just stay out of gay bars.
Not before i smash your face to bits once i see you in one
shut your cock holster, bitch
lel
sheesh did you lose your penis too or something?
I have had many dicks
Just STOP FUCKING LAUGHING ABOUT IT
he's a woman now
Because it's a psyop to excuse white male actors from the scene of the MCU.
Before you mention Black Panther, the girl they replaced Wakanda with is a transgender with linebacker shoulders.
Is that confirmed, I thought it was his chest got caved in.
think about it. he was on his back and the plow drove over his legs and torso. what's located between the legs and the torso? or rather, what WAS located there? you really believe that these murderblades that obliterated his legs and pulverized the ribcage did no damage to the infinitely more fragile dick and balls? all that shit popped instantly like an overripe cherry, not even enough material left to consider any kind of reconstruction. just fucking gone
his front fanny nine tails whip of dangling spaghetti skin strands
have you ever seen the weird penis type thing they make for FtM trannies? thats what he has now
You guys think this is funny?
A man lost his penis and you're laughing?
So did you guys just make up the penis thing up and obsess over this guys penis after he saved his kids from a runaway snow plow cuz just...yikes.
yeah kinda, but on the other hand its a real possibility he lost his dick, the plow really did a number on him and its not like thats something hed ever disclose to the world.
i bet if a woman #metoo's him he will settle out of court rather than expose his dick's inability to extract pleasure to the world.
I don't mind open sourcing this tactic on someone who works for disney.
You don't need a penis to get MeeToo'd you fucking virgin. They can also MeeToo you for things like farting on her boobies or fingerbanging her asshole, she just pretends it is "Unwanted Sexual Advancement" and the entire universe is her oyster
Fuck, my ex basically wanted to metoo some autistic kid who came into her work and asked her on a date. He hung around near the front door for five minutes working up the courage to ask if he she wanted to get dinner sometime and she refused and he said okay and left, then she came home acting as if he literally held her down and raped her or something. I said I appreciated the guy's courage and she got mad at me. Fuck that woman was a cunt.
>Runaway plow
>Cock ain't comin' back
>Ripped my genitals from tip to the sack
>guys, why are you obsessing so much about my, i mean HIS penis, which by the way was absolutely NOT eaten by a badger. that never happened and also it was a fox
The itsy bitsy penis was ripped off by the treads
Down came the first blade, and it ripped off the head
By the second blade both shaft and balls were gone
Then Jeremy Renner's penis was strewn across the lawn
That's good
Good job
there’s nothing funny about Jeremy Renner’s frozen penis being picked up and carried away by a coyote
The fuck was this cunt dancing around in front of a snow plough with his dick out anyway?
He only has himself to blame. He was probably high on marijuanas, you know what these Hollywood actors are like.
Hawkeye more like cockbye lmaooo gottem
If they remake MASH he could come back as Hawkeye. His cock and balls could play the mash.
That's the face of a ken doll, not a man.
Funniest thing from this incident
>not today motherf-ACK MY COCK
He forgot real life isn't one of his gay quippy movies. That's hilarious.
For him I hope he at least got to fuck Hailee Steinfeld before the accident.
I am officially declaring a moratorium on laughter in this thread. There is NOTHING funny about Jeremy Renner’s severed hog flopping around like a trout as it careens and spins back and forth around the ice skating rink
on the bright side he practically invented crotchless snowpants
Someone was there and filmed the whole thing!
https://ghastlyfunvhsfilms.wordpress.com/2012/09/05/street-trash-flying-penis-scene-lol-very-very-hard/
The plan today was move the snow away
But now I'm under... a heavy plow
By the way, I have to say
My penis... is no mo'
Squirrels and birds are eating bits of me
The bottom line is, I got plow'd
You realize Cinemaphile is going to troll Jeremy Renner into revealing his (UNBUTCHERED) cock on social media, right?
jokes aside, where is this penis destruction rumor came from?
lol you autists. the snowplow went over a good portion of his body. he got really fucked up. his dick also got really fucked up
I need video evidence and witness testimony
The media rushed to the scene and got there just in time to see the his dick get ripped off and fly at the camera. And then the media said his dick was just ripped off and there was a little news ticker at the bottom of the screen that said Hawkeyes dick is gone.
Is there any actual proof of his dicklessness?
>I BET YOU RECOGNIZE MY VOICE!
Dong dossier?
Is this the first case of someone getting castrated by a zamboni?
Weirdly, no. It's the 3rd.
>All I can say is I’m happy to be walking again. I thought for a while I would never walk, and it broke me mentally. I was so devastated. I didn’t care about anything else. The mangled cock? I didn’t give a shit, I just wanted to walk again. So I kept working harder and harder with my physical therapy, and finally after months of hard work, I can walk again without any assistance. It’s still difficult, but I am overjoyed that I can walk. Just know this isn’t the end of the journey for me, I will keep improving. I will train harder, I will walk further, I will have the cock surgically re-attached. This is only the beginning of this story.
>Jeremy there's something we have to tell you...
>we had to use your cocktail meat to repair your knees
>*cockney accent* bloody ell doc how could you do dhis to me bruv
no wonder it got shredded
Is there any recent pictures of him
*her
Holy Christ
I'm sorry Jeremy your testes exploded into a jelly of flesh and pus we had to remove them as well