Charming

>Producer of Shrek
>John Cleese, Demi Lovato, SIA, Avril Lavigne, Ashley Tisdale all on board
>It's absolute feckin dogshit

What the hell is the deal with this movie?
I never heard of it until I was looking for random budget animated movies online because they're my kink.

This is probably one of the worst I've seen, it's almost offensively bad. The execution is poor in basically every aspect of the film. Weak characters, weak writing, weak animation, weak humour, weak songs, hell even the voice acting is weak.

The sad thing is, I think the basic premise actually has quite a lot of potential. I could see quite a good movie coming from it. But this isn't that.
It can't have been low budget with all the stars they got, but then what did happen to have such a bad end product? It doesn't even make good use of the musical talent at hand.
Anyone seen or heard of this?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I actually want to watch this now. I am liking the Shrek knockoff feeling and the whole "subversive fairytale jab at Disney" era from over a decade ago. Is this European? The character model quality just looks those 3D European movies.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I don't think it's European, I've seen Eurojank movies and it didn't come across like that to me. Could be wrong however.
      If you turn off your brain, and I mean really turn it off, then yes, there could be something you enjoy here.
      I like Shrek, I love subversive fairy tale stories which is the reason i actually had high hopes watching this. But it's just shit anon. Some of the jokes are funny, many aren't, and you can't take the piss out of tropes when you fall into the tropes yourself.

      If you like Eurojank and like subversive tropes, maybe check out Here comes the Grump. I didn't even like that film, but it's better than this. I also started Happily N'Ever After recently. Watched a bit then stopped, need to get back to it but it's also subversive fairy tales from what I've seen so far.

      This came out in 2018 yet looks like a Bargin Bin movie from 2006

      You're on the money because it feels pretty much like that too. If it came out in 2006, it might have been OK. In 2019 it's abysmal.

      >from the producer of Shrek
      John H. Williams really likes to think that he was the most important or influential producer behind Shrek. In reality, that was Aron Warner. There's a reason why Aron was chosen to pick the academy award in case that Shrek won (which it did)

      Look at this 1999 article. Aron Warner is mentioned, but John H. Williams isn't. That says a lot.
      https://www.google.com/amp/s/variety.com/1999/digital/news/hartwell-buoyed-at-pdi-1117492039/amp/

      Interesting, I didn't know that. Given how funny Shrek was, I thought this would at least have some decent humour.
      I just don't really understand the films existence. It can't have been cheap to get all these people on board, so how did they manage it while also having nothing else going for it? And how did it release with practically no marketing? I don't know anyone who's heard of this film.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRykPQQ7QF0

      I was curious so I watched the trailer, seems like they were kind enough to spoil the whole movie so I don't have to watch it. I can see what you mean OP, it's an interesting twist on a fairy tale trope and could have been pretty funny... if it had come out about 10 years earlier. Cute girls though and amazons

      Damn, that trailer would have saved me watching 2/3rds of the film. Not that the final third is any good.
      The whole journey aspect is a bit like a gender reversed Tangled, but much worse.
      The part where it gets offensively bad is when the rogue thief has a big musical number in a pretty dress where without a hint of irony she sings about true love, being a commoner loving a prince and all the generic cliches of fate and destiny, becoming the exact kind of air headed Princesses the film mocks. But the characters are just written poor in general and practically bipolar.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >from the producer of Shrek
    John H. Williams really likes to think that he was the most important or influential producer behind Shrek. In reality, that was Aron Warner. There's a reason why Aron was chosen to pick the academy award in case that Shrek won (which it did)

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Look at this 1999 article. Aron Warner is mentioned, but John H. Williams isn't. That says a lot.
      https://www.google.com/amp/s/variety.com/1999/digital/news/hartwell-buoyed-at-pdi-1117492039/amp/

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Producer doesn't mean shit anyway. Writers and directors do all the work. The only thing worse than "from the producer of" is "from the company that made".

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Then how come they have it feature so prominently? What do they even do?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >a person responsible for the financial and managerial aspects of making of a movie or broadcast or for staging a play, opera, etc.
          >"a film producer"
          Literally they just throw money at it.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            pretty much just manage the budget and make sure the film will turn a profit

            Shit, really?
            So when it comes to the managerial aspect, it more means managing the finances and teams rather than input on the movie itself?
            I don't know why I didn't know this. I always thought they had direct input and, well, actually produced the bloody thing in terms of putting the whole thing together.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              they do have creative input, but it tends to be related to the bottom line - for example they may push for reshoots or cutting certain scenes if they feel the movie in its current state won't perform well with a particular demo

              basically the more commercial a film the more control the producers have over it, just look at the mcu

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Ah I see, thanks for the info. That makes sense then. I guess some are hands off, some are hands on. If they're helping fund it they get a say, but some likely don't choose to exercise it much.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                NTA, but just to complement a bit. Producers, ultimately, are there to make sure the film is finished on schedule.
                Crazy or inexperienced directors usually need strong producers to keep them on a leash, otherwise productions could go on for ages.
                This applies mostly to small and big studio productions. Independent and artsy-fartsy films follow a different set of rules in terms of roles.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Right I see
                I guess I just had the wrong conceptions, I thought the producer directly produced the product, but they're more like the team manager I guess who also funds the thing.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          pretty much just manage the budget and make sure the film will turn a profit

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    This came out in 2018 yet looks like a Bargin Bin movie from 2006

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I was curious so I watched the trailer, seems like they were kind enough to spoil the whole movie so I don't have to watch it. I can see what you mean OP, it's an interesting twist on a fairy tale trope and could have been pretty funny... if it had come out about 10 years earlier. Cute girls though and amazons

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Oh, and regarding John Cleese, he voices only 1 or 2 lines in the entire film, and it's as the Fairy Godmother in his "pepperpot grandma" voice.

    In fairness, I did laugh my ass off when I realised this is all they brought him in for, but I just don't get why they would bring him in just for this.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Charmed

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Rizzed

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        What does that mean?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Yfw if they just called it "Rizzing" it would have been a mega box office hit

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    With a cast like that I'm surprised this wasn't pushed more.
    I guess if they got a singer that was more popular with current youth like an Ariana Grande it would have done better. They're a different generation

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Why does Snow White have a genie lamp

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >"From a guy who delivered a pizza during the making of Shrek"
    I wonder if we'll see one like that someday... but, seriously, what's the most outrageous "From..." you remember?
    Hard Mode: No parody ones

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      "From the people who saw Shrek" was one I remember seeing, but I don't know if it was a Cinemaphile joke or an actual poster

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I watched Snow Queen, a 2012 Russian CG version.
      On Amazon Prime, it's listed as "the tale that inspired Frozen".
      Which is pretty hilarious, because it gives the impression the random CG film no one's heard of was pivotal to Frozen, when all it actually means is they're both based off the Snow Queen tale. It's a clever way to drum up interest since the phrasing is precise.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I always chuckle whenever I go to a RedBox and see the little pictures of stuff like this and it's all like, "From the guy who made this" - it might mean a lot to certain people, but my kids and even me have zero clue who the producer is and the art style isn't going to make me rent it, lol.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I guess it's just brand recognition. You'll know none of the people themselves, but you know, for example, Shrek, and looking at the cover maybe you'll think that it has similarities to Shrek
      I guess that's the intention anyway, it must work on some people since it's so common.

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