>could you explain these gaps in your resume, sir
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>could you explain these gaps in your resume, sir
>could you explain these gaps in your resume, sir
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I didn't feel like working.
he never said that
Y-yes sir, i was gooning for 6 months
I was doing my part, keeping the community safe, during the Covid 19 pandemic
>I was doing my part, keeping the community safe, during the Covid 19 pandemic
...keeping your community safe from what, exactly?
A bioweapon engineered by Fauci and China
From me
Same here. I collected neetbux and got drunk at the beach every day that summer. Also:
Unvaxxed
Untested
Uncircumcised
I kneel! Sadly, I am only unvaxxed although the many escorts whose services I partook in since COVID probably puts a damper on that too. If the shedding is true, of course.
And untouched
>Uncircumcised
What's crazy is I went my whole life thinking I was uncircumcised but I just found out I was, they just didn't cut all the foreskin off for some reason
>Umm the lockdowns ended years ago, care you explain your 2022-2024 gap?
long covid
Based
That or vaxx injury that former employed forced me to take
>I was helping my family with taking care of an elderly relative, while they supported me
>tfw i worked at a fricking chickenhouse during this time while a bunch of fricking hispanics that didnt know english had basically made my life hell because im white.
If i could go back and play my cards right, i would have signed up for unemployment or something.
the israelites, sir.
they did it.
Do people really give a shit about resume gaps? I've never had an employer ask about them.
yeah. they care in most occupations that have competition for jobs
Thank god that's not the case in my shitty balkan country
Huh, no wonder normies are so terrified of being out of work.
In america its a horrific system. You may as well be a convicted child rapist if you miss work for more then 3 months between the ages of 24-80
>3 months
Damn, how about like eight years
its over. You either have to lie on your resume, work at an Amazon warehouse or make your own work independently.
That ain't shit. I last punched out in 2003.
Two-thousand-fricking-three. I've been out of the full-time workforce twice as long as I was in it.
Aint no thang, old school. Just finesse the amount of time you worked at the last job or make up a company and say it went out of business. Unless its some job for a huge city or a big corpo management job they arent going to dig that deep. If youre blue collar you dont need a fricking cv your reputation should gold if you care about your trade and arent an unbearable autist.
When I was 25 I suffered a horrendous accident that rendered me unable to walk let alone work, that was 12 years ago in august. If I ever tried to get back to work, how big of a hurdle would that be for me? It's not like I don't have medical documented reasons for why I couldn't work.
I'm sorry, anon, but we went with someone who we think is a better cultural fit for the company
I had a 3 year gap due to illness and noted it on my resume along with a positive reference from the employer preceding the gap and was hired. Most people complaining have a gap because they smoke too much weed or drank themselves into their parents basement and can't explain the gap which is an obvious red flag.
Penis status?
I had a medical episode in my early 20s that kept me from working and then it was fricking impossible to get a real job afterwards because of that gap
completely changed the course of my life, it's such fricking bullshit
so just lie
You think they are gonna call anyone to confirm you worked there?
Yes? That's why you include references, they check with everyone you ever worked with. If the number you gave for a reference from 2018 doesn't pick up the phone on the 4th ring, you don't get the job btw
>competition for jobs
lol what a fricking joke. Noone wants a job.
That's because you're only qualified for shit jobs.
I make low six figures, how much do you make?
Like 24k reselling stuff. What of it?
My point was that whether or not a job is shit depends on how much you get paid to do it.
what do you resell?
Panties.
I knew a guy that drove laps around alleyways in Denver with a pickup. he'd store furniture in a storage unit and sell it on Craigslist and FB.
I throw out all kinds of stuff every time I move and so does everyone else. and I guess it adds up.
Post pay stub
1 dolla every month
If you need to compete for the job, it’s a shit one. For truly high quality individuals, like doctors, the jobs compete for you.
Yeah it's an obvious red-flag
red-flag about what?
being a lazy bum, not hard to grasp. There's no excuse to have any kind of gap, you can literally do volunteer work, study, anything other than browsing Cinemaphile and jerking off
>he said, posting on Cinemaphile while jerking off
>Ah, I see you have not done work for no pay. Tough luck buddy, we will not be selecting you for the next round
Right. Also, education doesn't mean a single thing nowadays (except if you are an ivy leaguer).
>you can literally do volunteer work
Literally talking about being a janny
I'd rather be a lazy bum than a homosexual
Holy based. Yeah frick volunteer work, what a ridiculous notion.
I do free shit for my friends and family all the time but I'm not gonna do it for complete strangers that don't give a shit about me
Damn right.
They assume you're lazy or couldn't find a new job because you're worthless.
They also assume that in the 4 months you weren't working, you forgot how to read or wipe your ass.
There's really no reason to leave a job without having one lined up and if you're unfortunate enough to get laid off in a team-wide layoff that's not your fault, there's really no reason it should take 4 fricking months to find another position. Post something on your linkedin about how you're sorry to announce your time at your old company has come to an end and your network should be setting you up with something within a few weeks.
If I lose my job tomorrow I have enough money saved up to last 8 years. Anyone who doesn't take it easy for a while between jobs is either desperate, psychotic, or running away from their home life.
Because you can't buy a 4 month vacation. It's something you have to seize when the opportunity arises.
>Because you can't buy a 4 month vacation
I don't need to. I just tell my employer I'm taking a 4 month paid vacation. It doesn't cost me anything.
>I just tell my employer I'm taking a 4 month paid vacation
lolwut, unless you saved up 640 hours of vacation time, that shit isn't happening
That would take years to build up and they probably have a limit on vacation hours you can accrue.
Even then they can deny your vacation request for such an extended leave.
Just don't be a moron like me and quit with no job lined up while also being lazy about getting a new job and end up going into tens of thousands in credit card debt
>your network should be setting you up
how many X chromosomes do you have?
About 36 trillion. Do you honestly think only women have networks? If you do, I genuinely want to know how you arrived at that belief.
>other people should be handing you a job on a plate
you're definitively some moronic woman
>Post something on your linkedin
>having a linkedin
lol
lmao
i haven't updated mine since i was in college 10 years ago
that's honestly how they think
so many bosses live their whole lives with their heads up their ass
about not being a good slave
>I've never had an employer ask about them.
That's because they chunk your resume in the trash and move onto the next the moment they see an employment gap of more than two months.
Just put the years of employment on your resume instead of the dates. They'll have no idea there's a gap if the years line up. Even a year long gap could be excused as a short gap at the end of the year.
If you have a huge gap then don't include the years at all. Just say "4 years at Company A, 2 years at Company B".
>Do people really give a shit about resume gaps? I've never had an employer ask about them.
>Thank god that's not the case in my shitty balkan country
Lol. Fricking commies. Never escaped the commie spirit. I knew this American guy who visited some soviet commie country and he was saying about how he met this local guy in the middle of a day on a workday and the guy offered to give him a tour. He asked him, "what about your job?" He said "we're communist, they can't fire me!" Lol. Lazy motherfrickers.
israelite can't give mutts a break from working tirelessly for Israeli interests
sounds cool
Unless his job was an important one (90% of jobs aren’t), based.
Good goy
It means you either got fired from your last job or don't need to work
They hate them for two reasons
It means either
A: You went to prison
or
B:You don't necessarily need to be working to survive and can drop out for long periods of time
They HATE B, even more than A, because they absolutely do not want you to have the leverage of being able to just walk away from a job. That's why employers in the US are universally against socialized medicine even though for most of them it would save them money and reduce liability. Tying health care to employment keeps you chained to them.
B is actually 'you are not a obedient slave'
bosses have the idea that people should be working 24 7, have no personal life, no holidays, no hobbies, never complain about lousy pay, ridiculous work or mistreatment, you should dream about working in retail and should sleep in the workplace
UBI will happen in our lifetimes, so most people will end up taking neetbux
>UBI will happen in our lifetimes,
You underestimate the neoliberal economic consensus and overestimate the plebs of the angloshoere to actually get up and do anything about it
>UBI will happen in our lifetimes
UBI is commie shit and the west is shifting towards right wing parties. How about you just get a job
when the right wing parties aren't just israeli owned proxies to bleed us dry in under paying over worked jobs where it's not acceptable to have any thing remotely considered free time
>the west is shifting towards right wing parties
The west is shifting toward """right wing parties""" that endorse far left economics.
>How about you just get a job
ai and robots are going to do ALL the jobs
how about you stop being a slave
How about you get rid of gender and race quota's first.
Only if you’re not good at anything.
>company hires a man with a 12 year gap in employment history
>he said he was homeless during that time
>he fails a piss test 1 month in
>having gaps in your resume
Just lie. I do. It's how I got my government job.
how?
>attack police
You’re brown aren’t you?
Intrusive thoughts are moronic, I had one yesterday in traffic telling me to put my foot down on the accelerator.
>Just lie
Not everyone is shameless
It's just little roast like questions "where do you see yourself in 5 years" or "name 3 of your weaknesses". Interviewer just wants to test you don't spill your spagetti, turn red and start stuttering bullshit under little pressure.
Interviewers started giving me shit about it after I got my first professional job, not so much when I was a lack of experience bum.
yes and no
yes if they're not serious
no if they need someone
I just want my carpet back, man.
my step father got in an accident
I was unemployed.
Honesty. I like that, I'll put in a good word for you with my nephew who runs a gas station, goodbye
I was busy fricking your mom
greatest Cinemaphile thread of all time
I was kidnapped by terrorists
I'm 34 and have never worked a day in my life.
same but 43, worked ~2 years
same but 39 and im running out of money, thinking about roping
Don't do it bro, the future is unknown
He's future is pretty known, his future is homelessness, that's the future for a lot of you in this thread, have fun!
*his
Did you get that endorphin rush from this to make you feel almost whole for another five seconds?
should have bought some cheap properties and became a land baron while you had the chance moron
you've already had more time off than most people ever will. get a job.
Miss my stress free NEET days.
Isn't it funny that, a hundred years ago, the only people who could say this were the rich and the moronic, and now the very poor (thanks to welfare) can also say it?
I wish I had that priveledge. I dont want to work but I'll be homeless in a month if I dont.
I haven't worked for 9 years.
Just say you were freelance in some random branch instead of showing a gap. Is that so hard?
My entire resume is complete lies citing LLCs my friend owns, and it works on these diversity hire HR people every time.
No. Because whatever I do off the clock is none of your fricking business
I don't have to work. I inherited a shit ton of money. Last week I passed out after a two-day bender and when I woke up I realized I had spent 36k on blow
>I had a lot of extra money and didn't need to work so just studied and did community work.
Oof.
This scares me.
Truck driver that saved up enough money(it's easy when you sleep in your work place and your only bill is your cell phone) so I took a year off work.
God luck finding a normal job that pays the same.
Also,very often I recognize movie scenes because I have seen so much of America.
It was also very fun seeing Japanese tourists,the ladies took pictures of each other holding a slice of truck stop pizza and the dudes did a masculine Elvis like pose.
This was on I 80, puxatawny Phil neighborhood.
How old are you?
>gaps
it's one big gap
I just kept failing interviews
>For months?
Yup
you explain these gaps in your resume, sir
No problem.
The first time, I was in jail for stabbing a c**t who was trying to rape my gf.
The second time, I couldn't be bothered getting a job because I was making too much money playing the stockmarkets with my own money.
I am here for a job because I have enough money to do as I please and I fancy a change from sitting at home, fricking my wife or going on vacation.
So... sell this job to me, you fat bastard.
You have 20 seconds to sell this job to me, fat man.
And you 12 seconds left.
I was hibernating, undergoing chyrsalis.
I have never had a job and never will
Do you really want to know?
I signed an NDA.
I went Jack Kerouac on everyone's ass
its just the one gap sir
I'm 32 and never had a job. I also have no friends. I feel like a ghost. Just sitting in my room not interacting with anyone but my parents.
haha same
I'm 27 and the same. Except for the constant yearly humiliation rituals they call family gatherings.
Get married
Then you go to 4 or 5 of them a year
What could you even do from this tar pit?
How do you make a friend when you're not anyone's friend's friend?
you tell me lol
I kinda gave up on life in my early 20s seeing I have nothing innate going for myself and I'm too depressed/lazy/scatterbrained/adhd whatever to work on myself.
get into fighting games, a TCG or anything that has open bracket tournaments. Go to one and now you have some friends in your area. You can even smell bad!
>get into fighting games
This is great for making black friends.
We should get diagnosed with autism. It's not like a person truly chooses to be a complete loser.
24 year old and same
I was going for hikes and long walks. You probably wouldn't know too much about that.
"Well you see the gap from my birth until today was because I've never had a job."
>y-you get to take my job virginity sir
>I was taking time off to travel
Translation: I took all of my vested shares and went on months long benders with coke and hookers.
Honestly is there anything wrong with the Dude's lifestyle? He lives a humble and modest lifestyle, doesn't hurt anyone, and is generally an upstanding member of his community (or at least tries to be.) Also, unlike big Lebowski, he doesn't have to pay women for sex.
He consumes resources without providing anything in return.
>He consumes resources without providing anything in return.
The other Lebowski is the same way though.
Are you employed?
Most people do. Less efficiently than welfare queens actually.
>David Graeber was an American anthropologist and anarchist activist. His influential work in economic anthropology, particularly his books Debt: The First 5,000 Years (2011), Bullshit Jobs (2018), and The Dawn of Everything (2021), and his leading role in the Occupy movement, earned him recognition as one of the foremost anthropologists and left-wing thinkers of his time.
>Born in New York to a working-class israeli family, Graeber studied at Purchase College and the University of Chicago, where he conducted ethnographic research in Madagascar under Marshall Sahlins and obtained his doctorate in 1996. He was an assistant professor at Yale University from 1998 to 2005, when the university controversially decided not to renew his contract before he was eligible for tenure. Unable to secure another position in the United States, he entered an "academic exile" in England, where he was a lecturer and reader at Goldsmiths' College from 2008 to 2013, and a professor at the London School of Economics from 2013.
>In his early scholarship, Graeber specialized in theories of value (Toward an Anthropological Theory of Value, 2002), social hierarchy and political power (Fragments of an Anarchist Anthropology, 2004, Possibilities, 2007, On Kings, 2017), and the ethnography of Madagascar (Lost People, 2007). In the 2010s he turned to historical anthropology, producing his best-known book, Debt: The First 5000 Years (2011), an exploration of the historical relationship between debt and social institutions, as well as a series of essays on the origins of social inequality in prehistory. In parallel, he developed critiques of bureaucracy and managerialism in contemporary capitalism, published in The Utopia of Rules (2015) and Bullshit Jobs (2018). He coined the concept of bullshit jobs in a 2013 essay that explored the proliferation of "paid employment that is so completely pointless, unnecessary, or pernicious that even the employee cannot justify its existence".
>thinking that walmart greeters and middle management are pointless is a israeli conspircy
>anarchist activist
>Occupy movement
>theories of value
These should be massive red flags. I think he's just looking at systems he doesn't understand and declaring it' wasteful. If your starting premise is "all systems are invalid", and your conclusion is "all systems are invalid", you should ask some questions. Yes, most of marxist/anarchist/leftist thought is circular or at least resting on major assumptions.
>David Graeber
this guy is a clown and his views on the history of money have been debunked by the austrians
Austrians are the biggest clowns in economics. Even their neolib masters don't respect them. Economics to keep the schizos and morons entertained.
>Austrians are the biggest clowns in economics
Then why are they right about everything?
Why are people afraid to debate them?
>neolib masters
LOL you're a brainwashed bootlicker
>Economics to keep the schizos and morons entertained.
You people literally believe printing and spending money doesn't cause inflation.
You literally think MMT is legit.
>Then why are they right about everything?
Rothbard doesn't even believe in calculus (but accidentally uses calculus for all his arguments anyway). He argues that there's almost never an intersection for a pair of supply & demand curves because prices are discrete quantities
>Rothbard doesn't even believe in calculus
Yes he does.
Why do you people always strawman with the "austrians cant into math" argument?
>Yes he does.
Rothbard: "[H]uman beings act on the basis of things that are relevant to their action. The human being cannot see the infinitely small step; it therefore has no meaning to him and no relevance to his action."
Mises: "[I]t must first of all be objected that the peculiarly mathematical conception of infinitesimal quantities is inapplicable to economic problems. The utility afford by a given amount of commodities, is either great enough for valuation, or so small that it remains imperceptible to the valuer and therefore cannot affect his judgment."
You follow an economic theory that rejects basic mathematics. There is a reason Austrians are laughingstocks everywhere.
>Why do you people always strawman with the "austrians cant into math" argument?
>strawman
https://mises.org/quarterly-journal-austrian-economics/cantors-diagonal-argument-extension-socialist-calculation-debate This is the worst "mathematics" I've seen in my life and it was published in a major Austrian economics journal. It betrays a fundamental misunderstanding of both Cantor and set theory.
>You people literally believe printing and spending money doesn't cause inflation.
>You literally think MMT is legit.
These can't both be true. MMTers explicitly state printing money causes inflation.
>MMTers explicitly state printing money causes inflation.
no they dont
>You follow an economic theory that rejects basic mathematics.
You claimed they reject math outright. They don't. They simply claim mathematics doesn't make sense to use in economics in the same way sociology doesn't make sense to use in chemistry.
>It betrays a fundamental misunderstanding of both Cantor and set theory.
How?
>no they dont
Yes they do. The central conceit of MMT is that taxes have to be levied to offset the inflation caused by the money printer.
>How?
The fact you have to ask this betrays you know nothing about set theory. Do you understand what an uncountably infinite set is? Do you know what a finite set is? Do you recognize that finite sets cannot be uncountable? Because the author doesn't.
>
You claimed they reject math outright. They don't. They simply claim mathematics doesn't make sense to use in economics in the same way sociology doesn't make sense to use in chemistry.
This is a rejection of calculus. Your pilpul has no effect on me because I'm not as moronic as you.
>they're wrong because I say so, and so are you chud
>no, I won't give any specific example that could be scrutinized
>unironically defending MMT
holy bootlicker
>it's a a moron doesn't understand the demand feedback loop post
Check this out, imbecile: a person pays rent and buys groceries and buys clothes and pays bills and has the regular monthly gamut of expenses. All of that consumption supports employment in dozens of different vital and life-sustaining industries. Does it matter where that person's income came from? Hint:
>no
Here's a better one, you fricking moron: say that person is a welfare queen or has a "bullshit job" (not actually a thing, anyway) and employers in the above-mentioned industries are suffering labor shortages. What market signal could they use to push people off the dole or out of "bullshit jobs" and into "more productive work" (although there is no such thing)? Another hint:
>see below
But the consumption is providing something in return. It's the consumption that supports employment. Producers would be unemployed without consumers. The consumption is itself a resource. It generates demand for production. Why would a homebuilder care whether the buyer has a "bullshit job" or is unemployed? Why would it matter? Hint:
>it doesn't
Cinemaphile is wrong about a million different things, but the one thing it is like Black person-tier moronic on is economics. You fricking people make Terrence Howard look white.
A proper homebuilder, aka a white guy with an llc that subcontracts out the ass to build suburban developments and city apartments, doesnt care about his clients job because he isnt some dumb meth head roofer or Hispanic drywaller and knows that his money comes from fake israeli fiscal maneuvering facilitated by banks and investment firms. So the plebs consoooomption has no bearing on his livelihood up until a recession hits.
So welfare leeches are good because they take hard-earned cash from productive members of society and spend it on doritos and soda
That's my point, bullshit jobs are just a less efficient and equitable form of welfare that wastes everyone's time. They should just be on welfare.
I'm shipping off to the Navy soon.
The bums will always lose
It would be probably easier to explain my gaping butthole than the gaps in my resume, Sir.
The economy is trash and the job market is all but gone
nooooooooooooooooooooooooo you just have to memorize 300 leetcode questions and then you can get to a 3rd round interview before the indian hiring manager picks all indians to hire for the entry level position
>we're simply expanding roles based on the increase of demand in the industry, judging from your sarcastic response I seem to have hit a bit of a nerve so I think we'll leave the interview there, thank you for your time
>sarcasm? You've judged my small attempt at humor too harshly, a shame really in a world that could use more laughter. My lawyer will be in touch.
Fricking nice
> that passive-aggressive stance and the lawyer remark
cringe
ok. what's the equivalent corporate speak way to answer OPs question?
>pursuing opportunities of yadda yadda
I took a 2 year sabbatical after my last job so I could have sex with your wife.
I'm almost 30 and my resume is blank. Is it over for me, bros?
"Yes, those were the years when I wasn't working."
Then you glare at them with a raised eyebrow like they're the dumbest motherfricker drawing breath in the whole world.
>i was working independently
worked for me, been at my job for a few months now
What did you say when they asked, "oh, doing what?"
"it's classified"
just say takeaway food deliveries, it's full of freelancers
well what are you being hired for?
or something unrelated. independent business venture. I attempted to start my own business which had it's share of successes and failures, both of which taught me a lot about the various fields in which I yadda yadda.
aggrandize whatever your hobbies are. imagine what a more successful person would do to monetize such a thing.
what do you aspire to? instead of lying just do that thing. I sold honey at the farmers market while collecting antiques from local estate sales. I was able to profit but it was less predictable than I'd hoped.
There are no gaps, why do you ask? I'm not seeing any. When do I start the position?
Yea, I was fired for not getting the covid jab and then lived off free government money for 2 years. It was amazing.
I studied the blade.
I got yelled at a lot when I was growing up, so it made me anxious, and that just made it harder to find work, because something would always go wrong, and then I would get yelled at again.
I was circumcized and that made me paranoid and neurotic but wasn't chosen or nepotistic so left to my own (destructive) devices.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
"Well, from ’33 to ’45, FDR was in the White House. So, I was on the welfare. And in the ‘60s, you had Kennedy and LBJ, so, I was on the welfare. And then from ’76 to ’81, Jimmy Carter. So, I was on the welfare"
It's a swastika, symbol of national socialism founded by the great hero Adolf Hitler.
No 🙂
I don't have any gaps in my resume. I'm 33 and could fill out jobs from when I started my first job baling hay as a 12 year old. I have a CDL now though so I could just make shit up because for trucking nothing you do matters except trucking.
Something about throwing hay and picking berries as a teen makes you want to work.
I'm 35 years old NEET, AMA. Never worked a job in my life.
Why do you refuse to contribute to society
I don't wanna
what do you mean by that?
NO PUSSY NO WORK
NO PUSSY NO TAXES
NO PUSSY NO PEACE
Men used to have to go to war to get pussy. You having to work and have your shit together is little compared to that.
Do you know what a Dear John letter is, and how many ww2 soldiers were fortunate enough to receive them? Men used to get women by keeping them in line, can't do that half way across the world.
That's what the pajeets and mestizos are for. There is no society.
I just got forced to go to school and shit on or cucked and shit on at home there's never been an "in" for me to be Team Society
Trust fund baby or welfare king?
More towards trust fund but I don't have one, I don't even think my dad knows how to set one up. He has a few million in retirement but it's only recently invested. If he was smart and had invested his money a decade ago we would probably be set for life. My dad was / is a surgeon and only just recently retired. He can make almost 5 grand a month on social security next year but still has 20 years of a mortgage to pay.
I live a frugal life for the most part though, I don't really spend money on anything except an occasional video game, and I have some of my own money from selling my Lego collection a few years ago, made close to 35k selling it all, after all the fees and taxes and everything I only really made about 25k though. I use this money for anything expensive I want to get for myself.
hero
No. I hate myself and my life every day and feel incredible guilt and remorse over not making anything of my life. I wish I never went down this path but once you start spiraling into it there's little hope of ever escaping. Who the frick would ever hire me anyways? I guess I could go do gig work and slave away at that making a meager amount.
I have a college degree but did nothing with it (in geology). I had opportunities to even go to med school and did passable on the MCAT but didn't get accepted and I just gave up on it due to depression. Ever since that I've basically been full time NEET, and that was over a decade ago.... god time flies.
>I have a college degree
You're set then. Get some retail wagie job, be less incompetent than your moronic coworkers, and after a year be moderately annoying to your bosses about wanting a promotion to a managerial position. From there once you have experience, you can apply for management jobs at other retail locations. Store managers at Walmart make six figures. You could easily get there after 7-10 years if you're not moronic or lazy.
>Just do the wagie dance for 7-10 years
You don't have to work at walmart. Go work for a franchise business like a UPS store or something. I did that and I made manager after a little over a year. Having a college degree and an IQ over 70 makes you so much better off than your coworkers.
What kind of retail store is even going to hire me, a 35 year old NEET with 0 experience in the first place? I mean I haven't actually tried applying for any jobs to my credit. I'm just too used to being a homosexual NEET and too fricked up from my past to think things will ever change I guess.
My only solace in life is that I do stay active, I'm thin, not fat and generally stay organized and clean in my life. I don't lift or anything but I do ride a road bike almost daily around 45 miles. I don't drink or smoke either so healthy wise I'm probably in decent shape.
homie go work in the oilfield and make six figs. It’s one of the few industries where you’re still allowed to be a sexist racist butthole if that’s your thing. Your degree won’t mean shit at first but it will open up opportunities later. On second thought, never mind. That shit is hard work.
Do they let manlets work in the oilfield
It’s like half Mexicans these days so you do the math.
Get cancer
>I have a college degree but did nothing with it (in geology)
Dude, apply to every oil company and oilpatch service company you can. You *can* get hired, trust me, the oilpatch always needs geologists.
Being a NEET honestly beats out working dead end jobs and having to get up at 6am. You might not be able to buy fancy stuff but I really don't know what I would buy if I had money anyway, I spend most of my time on my computer anyway
Wanna know what a neet and a wagie have in common?
They have no future and will be homeless in their old age.
Being homeless is a choice. I get guaranteed money every month that wont ever stop
I signed an NDA.
was his really mushroom shaped as they say?
I'm a 32 year old NEET and I got a job interview next week, is to be a CCTV operator. Do they hire people without experience in those kind of jobs or am I waisting my time? I can't imagine looking at security cameras for 8 hours a day being terribly difficult or needing training.
you wouldn't get to the interview part of the process if they weren't considering you
its easy to put a fake half decent looking resume together, whats hard is not spilling your spaghetti in front of someone who is actively judging you
i always beef the interview
>why do you want to work for us
>tell us about yourself
>name a time you helped someone
>what are your weaknesses
its all so tiresome
>I have an interview
>Do they hire[...]?
If you have an interview (or even if you got a phone call), the shit on your resume is good enough, even under the assumption that you lied a bit, because that's normal.
Sorry I forgot to make up some bullshit that covered them, knowing you never actually check and this is all just a formality we pretend matters just like you pretend your “demands” of 15 years of experience are real and not just another pretend to weed out the dumbest candidates.
>10 year gap
its over lads, might as well just live off neetbux forever
im about to be 31. i have ZERO job history.
was tired of answering questions from pricks like you
>Look at that frickin’ phony, Dude. Pretending to be a frickin’ NEET. Let me tell you somethin’ else: I’ve seen a lot of NEETS, Dude. And this guy’s a fake. A fricking goldbricker. This guy frickin’ works. I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.
I WAS GOONING
I'M GONNA CUM IN YOUR DRAWERS
I didn't want to admit that I was working at an ice cream shop.
are you henry rollins?
I'm 40 years old and have had a job yet. Thanks for asking.
No.
it was my fricking rug
i was minding my own fricking business,
you shoud try it sometime
I signed an NDA
I became a stay at home dad after covid and got lucky as frick with my meme coin moves.
2001 Honda Civic baby LETS FRICKING GO my baby momma is a brand prostitute and I want my daughter to go to a meme college like The New School, RISD, or Sarah Lawrence.
>I was raped by my previous employer and I would rather not elaborate further
The trick is to make the boomers feel bad for even asking
I bum money off my dad who is a business owner. I am too mentally ill to care. And if you think that's pathetic, try mocking me as I gaze at you with my piercing hunter-eyes
Black person
A few years ago I beat up some dude while I was blackout drunk. The judge said I had to pay my victim damages so I had to talk with a financial counselor to determine a payment plan for my restitution. You should have seen the look on the boomers face when I told him I didnt work(on paper), didnt have a bank account(in my name), and was homeless(my baby momma pays my bills). Only reason I didnt tell him outright that I would never pay a cent and just eat a fricking civil lawsuit is because I knew the judge was a bitter c**t and she would send me to jail.
You shot them at point blank with your hunting shotgun, remember?
It's basically impossible to get a decent job as a NEET with 6 year C.V gap. Even if you want to work you just can't because nobody will hire you and it's not worth doing some shitty amazon job.
Have you considered just fricking lying? I haven't been able to hold down a job like a normal person either. Lots of stints of a two months here, two months there, back on gibs, two months there, back on gibs. I just added more months to every job, filled out some bullshit jobs for my teens and early twenties. All of a sudden it didn't look half bad. You can also pad it with projects or courses if you've done any. A lot of people don't realize this, but once you're in, it's all about selling yourself. Last "real" job I had was as an office manager job. I show up to the interview seeing three women in the room. We barely even talked about the job I just started flirting with them and bullshitting about some relevant sidegig I conjured for the application. Yes, it obviously helps to be handsome, but I honestly think most guys could do what I did. Still stopped showing up after two-three months though.
kek most guys on this site would be in deep shit if the interviewers were women, even without any employment gaps or other resume issues.
I had to quit my last job because of mental health reasons, such cases. Sadly on my resume it probably looks like I was fired since I was only there for 15 months or so. I've filled in the gap since by saying I've been doing contract work, which is true except I haven't had any clients or looked for them either.
Glad to hear you're doing better anon, you had me worried when you quit
>I signed an NDA.
Family medical issue
>stretch the truth and pad resume
>act and dress respectably
>apply only for full time entry level office positions
>avoid anything that involves interacting with customers or clients
>avoid places where everybody has a degree or certificate since you'll never advance
>work hard for a year or two and ask for raises every few months (you'll end up at a low but comfy level)
>if uncomfy or not getting raises quickly move on to next job and repeat
At that point you can coast for as long as you want, you're efficient and meeting minimum standards so nobody cares. I never have to interact with customers or do anything physical and screw around on my computer and phone half the time. I'm an anti-social highschool dropout idiot and I still went from my parents basement to total independence.
>1.5 years since I got laid off from my last (and only) mechanical engineering job
>only have 1 YOE (actually 11.5 months)
>just barely started applying after a huge bout of depression
How fricked am I bros?
Say you were working on personal projects because you wanted to start a business. Make up anything you want for it but be enthusiastic when discussing it. Sadly you didn't have the capital to take it further.
Or do what this anon does:
My go-to's going to be that I've just been taking care of a sick family member (not entirely untrue, it was me). I did do one side project and got my FE certification a couple months ago so I'll point that out if they're worried about skill/fundamentals deterioration.
I'll try those 2 options out if this doesn't work out.
You sound fine, I wouldn't worry about it. I've interviewed people and sometimes if there are gaps I'll ask about it but it's really not high on my list of concerns to begin with. If you can evidence the fact you've been keeping your skills up (or can convincingly bullshit about it) I'm not exactly going to hire a PD to pick through your trash and find evidence to the contrary. If I were you I'd probably look to explain why you left your last job so quickly, that's more eye-catching than anything else.
Also I'll give you the best advice I ever received for being an interviewee: walk in knowing that the company needs you, not the other way round - that's why they're hiring in the first place. Obviously don't be wienery but being able to maintain a relaxed confidence does wonders psychologically. Best of luck anon.
Thanks man. This was reassuring. Just applied to 5 more jobs since my last post. Gonna try and hit 200 by the end of the month.
do you know anyone? it's 100x easier to get your foot in the door. even if you meet someone just to do that. networking somehow. whatever field you're in, can you try to go to a convention or something? I know it's weird. if you know anyone that knows someone it's way easier
I was laid off my job and came back to it three years later. Problem solved.
why the frick am I getting rejected from warehouse jobs
it's not like I have a degree on my resume
do you think warehouse guys utilize HR software? can you show up with a firm handshake. try to meet the guy. or call directly
Guys I lied about having a degree (I'm one class from finishing) and got the job
What do I do
take an online course and finish it.
Lmao you and pretty much everyone else. You are a cuck if you dont do that these days
stupid homosexual
Found the anon who was too pussy to add in a few white lies to his resume. Everyone does it, whats the worst that can happen, not getting hired? You sure as hell aren't getting hired if you dont
i didn't have jobs during those times, sir
How am I supposed to list contacts if I literally don't know anyone. I haven't spoken to anyone in years
>Buy a second phone and use the number for a fictitious reference
>Answer the phone and give yourself a good recommendation using a disguised voice
Enjoy your new job, anon.
>during the interview
I have red hair and identify as black coded. You're a fricking biggot and I'll sue you if you don't hire me.
>tfw couldn't take the pressure and failed uni
I'm so fricked.
What “pressure”? University is high school 2.0 these days.
It's nice how a thread that started as a troll (FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELVES!) Turns into a lot of friendly advice.
Currently working remotely but what I really want to do is art. But working in animation is hard work and very exclusive. I freelanced for years and never got paid well enough to consider it a career. Oh well.
Doubt anyone cares but I posted a thread a couple weeks ago about an employer catching me lying about the employment dates on my résumé to cover a lengthy gap (they have a software that basically tracks employment, it even had a job I worked for literally one day at on there). I did actually end up getting away with it -- bullshitted that I actually got promoted when I actually quit (was basically fired), photoshopped bank statements to make it look like I was still receiving a paycheck and listed a buddy as a reference alongside my actual previous boss there and he evidently did a good enough job improvising. Ended up turning it down for a different job anyway lmao but it was a good exercise in how to get away with this shit
>they have a software that basically tracks employment, it even had a job I worked for literally one day at on there
Uh oh.
Yeah it's some Minority Report shit, I was shocked when they sent me the email about noticing "discrepancies." Evidently it isn't flawless though, talking to the chick from HR from the place hiring me on the phone she found it believable that it fricked up in that instance given my alibi that I changed positions and branches within the company.
Fyi the company administering the background check is called HireRight and I believe (just from reading reddit posts about it) the database they use is called The Work Number. I wouldn't expect smaller employers to necessarily participate
I hope that these companies don’t operate in the EU or I’m fricked.
You guys seem to have better privacy and employment laws than us so I'd be skeptical but idk. This is the first time I've had any background check this extensive, usually they don't even check references
>could you explain these gaps in your resume, sir
>No, I signed an NDA, so I legally cannot.
a gap would imply I ever had a job in the first place
i worked one day in my life and i'm never doing it ever again
what happened?
shit myself in front of 40 people
i was a kp in a hotel and i broke their giant washing machine. the kitchen started flooding so i called my mom, snuck outside and waited for her in a tennis court until 1 in the morning. i texted, "i'm sorry", to my boss a few weeks later and he never got back to me. this was 3 years ago and i pretty much haven't left my room since.
That's good, if you leave the house the snipers will get you.
>get PIP'd because I'm slacking and I hate my job
>leave before they can fire me
>go frick off on travelling for a month
>come back
>find job within 2 months of looking that pays 25 percent more and let's me go fully remote
works on my machine
Independent study
Start a job Monday after being unemployed for a year. I'll miss all the free time but I did absolutely nothing productive so it's probably for the best
>I'll miss all the free time but I did absolutely nothing productive so it's probably for the best
Same here, productivity isn't really important if you don't do anything of value,otherwise it's just busywork
I was busy fricking your wife
Just fake your resume. If you get caught, so what? It's not illegal so just try again.
Just say you tried to start a business on your line of work but it didn't work out
i did a line on your mum’s bum! oorah!
le NDA, sir.