>Gandalf the White? >More like Gandalf the Fucking Retard!

>Gandalf the White?
>More like Gandalf the Fucking Retard!

how do you respond without sounding mad?

  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    n-n0 u

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >AY YO CRACKA CHU SAY? IMMA MUDAFUGGIN RAPE YOUR BITCH ASS TILL YOU LOVE ME NYUGGA

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Like this.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >AARRGG NOO, NOT SPINNING!!
      >SAAVE ME FRODOMAN!

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I always found it weird that he did this dance. I mean Saruman apparently was shocked, too, as you can see him carefully approaching Gandalf here. Did he really think that he could scare Saruman away that easily, though?!

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      CHUNTARO STYLE

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >2002 MTV Movie Awards nomination for Best Fight

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Even as a kid I thought this scene and the one after where Gandalf gets shot up into the roof was extremely goofy. I still adore it though.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I mean, it is goofy but at the same time the other person can't orient themselves, cant fight back, and it gives them a profound feeling of loss of control without actually hurting them.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah I feel as though they communicated that pretty well, especially to show how powerful Saruman is as a wizard that he can just casually manhandle Gandalf with magic. As well as Saruman humiliating Gandalf for refusing his offer to be part of the point of that scene

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Tell me, friend, when did Saruman the wise abandon based for cringe?

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Hey pal aren't we, like, angels who were sent here for a specific reason by literally divine beings that we both lived among?
    Like, do you think we should maybe re-evaluate the situation from original principles and intentions?
    I mean we are immortal entities, right? How did the past 2000 years completely wipe out the principles we worked for for the preceding 2,000,000? Like, can we check in with the boss about any of this before we do a 180?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Bitch you a house nigga.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      When the Istari took human form, they also took on human weaknesses. They legitimately become more "human" over time. That's how the 2000 years living in human form can overwrite the 2000000 years of their previous lives: their weak human brains can only remember so much.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You have to understand that every single one of the Istari forgot his principles.
      They ALL grew accustomed to middle earth life and basically diverted from what they had to do
      >Radagast went to fuck off to the woods
      >Saruman started to think he could rule, if noone else was in charge
      >Gandalf fuck off to chase treasures and shit
      >The blue ones fuck off to live dunedain lives (allegedly)

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Gandalf fuck off to chase treasures and shit
        was to kill smaug and prevent sauron from using him doe

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          How exactly was Gandalf going to kill a dragon with 12 dwarves and a fucking hobbit? The dude just wanted to go on an adventure for treasure.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            This
            I like Tolkien but this feels like a very George Lucas moment for him retconning Gandalf's reasoning

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              He rewrote part of the hobbit to match lotr too. In the first edition, gollum gives bilbo the ring and they part on friendly terms.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I have an annotated version of the Hobbit that documents every change between each publishing run
                It's really neat to compare the differences

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >the version where he actually takes the train
                >the version where he reminisces aboit going to London and seeing the queen
                >Gollum basically kneels before Bilbo and gives him like 10 magic rings for free
                >the version where the dwarves have flintlock pistols
                >the Battle of the Five Armies is a bloody affair and a trench war with uncountable losses and Bilbo leaves a changed man

                Lot of stuff that wouldnt make sense in Lotr canon

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                It's really fortunate that Bilbo caught trench fever and was sent home so he could write "There and Back Again"

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I guess he was just going to figure something out when they got there, he is a wizard after all.

            I have an annotated version of the Hobbit that documents every change between each publishing run
            It's really neat to compare the differences

            https://www.ringgame.net/riddles.html

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Stab him in his sleep I guess?
            It worked on Glaruung

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        It's also funny when Gandalf suspects Bilbo has the Ring and after 2000yrs of fucking around he's like, "OH RIGHT, my whole reason for being on Middle Earth. Shit I gotta go". The Istari honestly made the Sauron problem way worse with their hubris.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Now let's not jump to conclusions, Frodo! I must make a 17 year journey tracking down Gollum and reading every book in Minis Tirith before we can set out for Mount Doom! We wouldn't want to travel all the way just to throw a perfectly ordinary magic ring into the crack of doom!

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            well yeah, the journey was basically beyond suicidal

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Yes, but I'd imagine Sauron's forces weren't quite as fully prepared to attack Middle Earth 17 years earlier

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I assume one of his earliest ideas would be to destroy the ring with a band of heroes like Glorfindel, Aragorn, Boromir etc, would be a shame to waste them on a fools errand.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Gandalf was wise enough to know the ring needed to be moved by someone who legitimately had no motive to use it.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >I assume one of his earliest ideas would be to destroy the ring with a band of heroes like Glorfindel, Aragorn, Boromir etc,
                A plan like this was proposed at the Council of Elrond but it was concluded stealth was the best option with how large Sauron's forces had become. Yah, Gandulf fucked up by waiting almost two decades to act.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          to be fair Sauron wasn't doing shit for a very long time so he thought he could chill

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Gandalfs thing is the Shire. It's like his own personal pet project, keeping all the bad shit out of the Shire. He also seems to have a lot, one night say too much, affection for Hobbit boys...

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          well, they're technically adults.
          Mithrandir as a Maia helped make the holbytlan so he could indulge his fetish without molesting actual elven kids

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Is that why all the hobbits go barefoot?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Dawg the blue ones went way farther than that

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      They dont really remember all that. Maybe they have a vague idea of their original purpose, like a half remembered dream. Only Gandalf the White truly remembered and knew who he was fully.

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Big talk for guy whose staff doesn’t work for shit anymore.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      how do you get your staff to work properly again?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        AA batteries, use a Phillips on the lower end of the staff.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I don't understand how to use those on my penis

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            That sounds like a you problem

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I wouldn't say a single Word to him.
    I would listen to what he had to say, and that's what no-one did.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Underrated, but I think you mean the uruk hai

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I like to think that he sent Gwaihir on purpose to rescue Gandalf and lured Treebeard to attack Isengard because he found out that Saruman called him a foolish simple bird taimer

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >We're making The Hobbit into a trilogy!
      >No let's not use that cool giant bear thing, let's not use Tom Bombadil
      >Let's use some random hippie with a sled of rabbits who has bird shit on his face. Genius!

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Hey we're making the Hobbit book into a TRILOGY!
        >No, I'm afraid we don't have time to cover anything that happened in Mirkwood! We have a romance plot to shoehorn!

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Oh fuck I forgot about that too, what a joke

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Sir, I've been looking at the appendix in Return of the King. It says Azog died in Moria and none of this shit with him chasing Thorin ever happened
          >Peter Jackson and Guillermo Del Toro ignore the intern and continue inhaling each other's farts

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Sir, we have this character called Salamander Struck, and there's a legend that one time he kicked a samander under a storm, and a lightning bolt struck it, and we are going to show a flashback of that happening
          >Seems like a cool rare event. Let's repeat it at the end of the same movie

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            what is this in reference to

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Balin telling Thorin's story with the oak shield, and then he does it again later on the movie

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Oh yeah
                jesus christ

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Hey we're making the Hobbit book into a TRILOGY!
        >No, I'm afraid we don't have time to cover anything that happened in Mirkwood! We have a romance plot to shoehorn!

        Is this honestly true? They didn’t include Beorn or much of Mirkwood? Out of three fucking movies?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Beorn appears for 10 seconds
          His animal servants don't make an appearance at all
          Mirkwood is cut down to just part of where Bilbo fights the spiders and the party gets captured by the elves
          They also made Mirkwood fucking bright

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          mirkwood was about ten or fifteen minutes. the dwarves basically wander around lost

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Well, I'm not Gandalf so I wouldn't really care

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      How would you feel if you didn't have breakfast this morning?

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Don't you have some manlets to go mug for tobacco?

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    What was Saruman endgoal?
    Lets assume that his Uruks BTFO-ed Ents and he captured the one ring for himself.
    What would he do with it? Give it to Sauron?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      He was going to use the rings power to overthrow Sauron and become the new evil overlord

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      to end the patriarchy and bring immigration to the shire

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      if he could get the ring first, keep it and defeat sauron with it, taking middle earth for himself. if he couldnt get the ring, keep being saurons henchman and accept his place as right hand man.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Sneak unseen into the girls locker room and watch them shower.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        SARUMAN THE SNEAKY

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      The 1978 movie is ironic kino

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      That's a big dick

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        For hobbits.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      My Dad adored LotR and was nostalgic for the 1977 film so we had a big ass poster of this image in the house. Honestly scared me as a kid. Everybody looks like they're in a panic.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        If Gandalf showed that big-arse sword I'd be in a panic too.

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    THE WHITE RIDER

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      The Witch-King shattering Gandalf's staff was Hobbit Trilogy tier.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Stupid shit like this is why only the Fellowship extended edition is actually kino.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Sad but true.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Bottom right, fighting cockerel ready for battle.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        He is the lord of all cocks

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Good is represented by white color
      >Evil is represented by black color
      REALLY Tolkien? REALLY?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        It legitimately was a different time.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Shadowfax
      >white
      Does gandalf know what color shadow is?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Tolkien named the horse Shadowfax as an easter egg referring to the brand of fax machine he owned when he submitted his draft of Lord of the Rings to his publisher
        The fax arrived so fast he named a horse after it

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          ok but why Shadow then?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            That was the brand of fax maxhine Tolkien was using
            A Shadowfax 39®

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Checked.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              you just know

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            He was a big fan of Sonic.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        ok but why Shadow then?

        In Spanish he's called Sombragris (literally, Grey Shadow). I was surprised when I heard it's called Shadowfax originally

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >In Spanish he's called Sombragris (literally, Grey Shadow).
          That's cool.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >white horse
          >calls him grey
          why?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It's a silvery grey horse.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              it's clearly white and very privileged

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous
      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        GROND
        GROND
        GROND

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Saruman of the many colors?
    More like Sauronman of the many blunders!

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Love Shadowfax.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    He didnt say that

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Saruman of many colors?
    >Rainbow wizard?
    >homosexual

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    just wait till the blue wizards here about this!

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      They're dead

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    NIGLETS AND HOES

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Sauronman the Multi Colored?
    Dirty hippie, go smoke some halfling weed

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  26. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    AT LEAST I'M NOT SARUMAN THE STINKY!

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      That sounds pretty mad honestly

  27. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Y-you too

  28. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Why does everyone treat "being mad" as a failure state? You should be mad when people say things that are untrue because they are an insult to truth itself. I think this all began with "U mad?" back in the olden times.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Emotions are for Nazi's

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You mad

  29. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >something something your mother

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >That hobbit ditchweed has clouded your mind, gayboy. I am rubber, and you are glue. WHATEVER YOU SAY BOUNCES OFF ME AND STICKS TO YOUUUUUUUUUU

  30. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Wearing a rainbow cloak makes you look like a massive homosexual

  31. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    well fuck you too Suckruman poopy pants

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