I liked how the map specialist or whatever the frick got lost, and all his specialist skills and proficiency amounted to throwing a bunch of drones that one time
they spent money to send him to outer space to do this
He was a rude butthole with jail tattoos who said he was there to get some money.
Disposable.
I’m mean he did map the area, the ship got the maps.
He technically did what he was supposed to do, it’s probably just a bonus the moron got lost and died.
George Lucas was inspired by the look of classic cars. This is intentional. He wanted the ships to look more artful before they were mass-produced and industrial (X-Wings, TIE Fighters etc) during the Galactic Civil War. I also thought this didn't make sense until I heard this in one of his interviews recently.
According to the deletes scenes the engineers in this movie were a sub race created by the original engineers, which we never actually see. So yeah the big fosilized guy in alien might as well be one of the originals
no its not, the tech is more advamced and the space jockey of the first movie was bigger and fossilized
There's no way Ferris Bueller was set in the past. Their depiction of Chicago was far more advanced, futuristic, and civilized than the Chicago of today.
Idk I wouldn't care so much about the plot holes or stupid shit that doesn't make sense like the scientists taking off their helmets if the characters were good but I don't think there is a single likable character in the whole movie. I guess the robot is okay but everyone else I hated. Whiney female main character with annoying accent, her dickweed boyfriend, the c**t leader of the mission, the token black guy, the butthole scientists, none of them likable or interesting.
Anon, this was overconfidence combined with boredom about a process repeated hundreds of times... I don't think it's comparable to literally mankind's first contact with alien life, which also just happened to visually resemble one of the most aggressive and deadly animals found on earth.
When 'tickling the dragon's tail', always remember to use the damn spacer bars incase your hand slips... Or you'll get a leathal dose of radiation that will sicken and probably kill you slowly, painfully, and in a horrible way.
>several people told him he'd kill himself handling it in such a moronic manner >while handling it in said moronic manner, he did in fact, kill himself (in 9 days)
Who could have foreseen it?
> project has untold millions in funding (back when millions was actually a big amount) > NAH ILL USE THIS SCREW DRIVER > kills himself hurts others
Fricking idiot
the crazy part is that a year earlier another person died from it, literal death wish to frick around with it
at lest he flipped it fast enough so everybody there didnt die with him
>gee bros the air seems breathable enough you know
*takes off helmet on an alien planet after five minutes*
>well the air is breathable right here, so let me remove my oxygen mask before walking further into this cave
Surely this has never caused any deaths on Earth.
>demoncore-chan
I didn't think that was a real name but just some filename so I didn't google it. Damn you. You made me newbie it. Damn you all!
>2018 meme
Ok, buddy.
2 years ago
Anonymous
>2018 meme
what did he mean by this
2 years ago
Anonymous
>obscure new-ish meme
Gee, I dunno. Something about someone tickling their own tail, I'm sure. Imagine my surprise that it would be the same preening groaners talking about the unrealism of this documentary series known as Alien.
2 years ago
Anonymous
what the frick is this guy going on about? can we get a tardwrangler in here to translate?
2 years ago
Anonymous
level 4 tard wrangler here, i have no clue. need at least a level 6 to decipher that mess.
2 years ago
Anonymous
"Tickling their own tail" is a reference to the postmentioned meme. Calling people a newbie for not knowing that 2018 meme. It happens to be, to my surprise, the same people preening, meaning basking in their own glory, over this movie not being a documentary.
Consider yourself wrangled, tard.
2 years ago
Anonymous
>Calling people a newbie for not knowing that 2018 meme.
Except that didn't happen anywhere except in your schizoid mind.
Like someone who is specialized in making maps and scanning caves getting lost.....in a cave with ultramodern equipment ? Biologist who wants to pet a giant snek while he would never do something like that on earth?
>Biologist who wants to pet a giant snek while he would never do something like that on earth?
Dude, I know atleast three Herpetologists personally, who died trying to pet snakes.
Reptile fans are weird.
I went to a reptile expo for the first time last weekend. Weird vibe from the diverse attendants. I concluded that the distinguishing feature of that subculture is a particular sadism. They enjoy watching their reptile eat living things. Perhaps your friends secretly wanted to be eaten themselves, in a sexual way. Weirdos.
Desu, knowing massive historical frick ups the idiocy of the scientists in these films isn't that comical.
>massive historical frick ups the idiocy of the scientists
Donal Rusk Currey gets boring instrument stuck in an area where he is studying and documenting really old trees. Whatever let's go to the National Park Service and get a permit to cut that thing down and get my tool back, grab some forestry boys and cut that b***h down.
Wew that was a lot of work, start looking at the tree, huh that is a lot of rings, start looking more, frick that is a lot of rings, start counting more and more. Frick, frick frick. OK no one say anything. Inform a few other researchers and NPS and NFS no one really wants anyone to know that the oldest non colonial organism was just killed, shit leaks out years later and causes a shitstorm in the 60s.
Yeah he killed the Prometheus tree (funny given this thread) 5000 years old. They didn't find anything older until 2013, 9 years after his death
The map scene made 0 sense, the guy literal uses those orbs to scan the place the ship even detects it and Idris says "i'm reading you guys there's something moving". Then for some reason he gets lost the guy with the map.
It’s about on par with the demon core, like hey guys, let’s do experiments with a nuclear bomb core and will use screwdrivers to keep it from going critical.
It's been a while since I watched, but wasn't it either implied or explicitly said that the expedition wasn't expected likely to return? So the crew were basically all the most mercenary and willing to risk everything for a small chance of a big pay day.
The crew weren’t told where they were going and what the mission was.
All they were told was that it was a two year journey in hypersleep to the destination. Mystery mission that could be a break through, probably told they would be rich/ famous and two year hypersleep journey back.
So I doubt the top scientists agreed to go.
the scene on the bluray where the biologist finds the baby worms in the atmosphere processing room that don't attack him should have really been left in
in the original they only appear in the scene where the crew unknowingly steps on some of them in the dirt, there's a longer scene where the biologist takes samples of some after holloway takes off his helmet
I hate how people try to make Promotheus part of the mythology. when i watch Alien, i dont keep this movie mind as a prequel or even the sequel with the queen life cycle. There is no way this dumb fricking albino from Cinemaphile is in any way the same being in Alien.
I hate how people try to make Promotheus part of the mythology. when i watch Alien, i dont keep this movie mind as a prequel or even the sequel with the queen life cycle. There is no way this dumb fricking albino from Cinemaphile is in any way the same being in Alien.
The idea of the jockey being a suit was around a long time. I liked it and was excited to see them actually use it even if the end product wasnt that great. I think everyone's problem with these ideas is that movies are forced to have one canon so now suddenly all follow on movies and content needs to incorporate this stuff even if you preferred the old canon. I kinda hate that this is the way, it upsets some fans and stifles ideas. The comics and books and such were free to run with any idea or weird concept they wanted, creating dozens of different continuities that could be fun or lame. If only there could be a regular canon that could get its new alien 3 sequel, and a prometheus canon for those who enjoyed that, and whichever other ones that fans would enjoy.
It's better than what we have now which is nothing and Alien is stagnant. There's a new tv show coming out but I have little faith it will be good.
2 years ago
Anonymous
the last solid decade of absolute garbage should've been enough to convince you that, no, something is not necessarily better than nothing.
2 years ago
Anonymous
There's 200 years worth of room between 3 and Resurrection. They could do anything they want. Trying to make a pale retcon/reboot sequel that rehashes Aliens and its characters would be about as stale as any other idea they've had since. I'm fricking sick of people pushing that idea.
2 years ago
Anonymous
Alien 3 isnt canon anyway. It was obvious that they made it back to earth after Aliens. Sure, i'd be fine with another Alien movie near to that time period that has nothing to do with Ripley.
2 years ago
Anonymous
Go back to bed, James. You've had your moment. It's done. Deal with it.
2 years ago
Anonymous
>Alien 3 isnt canon anyway
still better than aliens, though
2 years ago
Anonymous
I love seeing the absolutely unhinged contrarian takes on here. They're always so funny.
2 years ago
Anonymous
go watch the assembly cut. completely different movie.
2 years ago
Anonymous
I don't care about contrarianism
aliens is utter, worthless shit
2 years ago
Anonymous
what in the actual frick do you consider a good movie then?
2 years ago
Anonymous
I legitimately love the assembly cut, It's not contrarianism for me, I just really prefer 3's style and mood. It's more in line with the first one in terms of dialogue and characterization.
That's fine? They're just what if scenarios to explore what is a fun explanation for the mystery. The comics also did the elephant man that floats around with high technology and it was pretty silly
I want alien 4 sequel
I like all 4 alien movies and I wanted to see what happens when they finally reach Erf after like 350 years or however much passed since alien 1
I heard that they worship the space jockeys or want to emulate them. That is still moronic and the mere idiocy of it makes me dismiss the film further. Also, i shouldnt need to read a fricking production book to understand what the mythology of the film is.
>the sequel with the queen life cycle.
There is a painting(?) of an alien queen in the room where they find the alien canisters, so NO, David didn't created the xenomorphs
Im talking about Aliens. I take the Xenomorph as it is presented in the first movie without the ant-hive explanation. If anything, i take them as self replicating as implied in the deleted scene with dallas.
Its up to your imagination. It could be a war ship or the xenomorphs could be bio-engineered creatures. I personally believe them to be a combination of biomass and artificial materials. I believe the ant colony explanation just reduces them to dumb animals (which are easily dispatched by gunfire in Aliens). I see them in the same way as tetsuo the iron man or the ending of Akira; able to consume or integrate artificial materials into itself or create a habitat or eggs from them as well biological material.
Look at his work. There are veganas and dicks everywhere. The port holes in the alien ship are basically veganas. The alien egg was supposed to look like a vegana too but the studio though it was too much.
>TIL that H.R. Giger initially designed the eggs from the Alien movies to look like a vegana; As there were complaints that Catholic countries would ban the film he doubled the lobes to four, so "seen from above, they would form the cross that people in Catholic countries are so fond of looking at."
the guy was closeted gay. when it looked like a penis he was immediately drawn to it. when it expanded into a vegana, he was repulsed, but overcompensated by getting even closer, for fear of being outed.
if you saw a rattlesnake or some other kind of animal in the wild would you think oh let me pet it? this guy is a fricking idiot. But I think that was the point of his character. All the people there were supposed to be the worst and cheapest replacements for their competent counterparts.
I doubt any really successful scientist would agree to a minimum 4 year mystery mission who zero details.
I think the ones that agreed were hoping to get money out of it.
They were enough to get the job done.
They probably would have killed them anyway if everything went right and weyland got immortality like he wanted to keep the secret. Probably would have sabotaged the sleeping pods or something.
I think the only people that would agree to a minimum 4 year journey on a mystery mission you find out about when you get there would be morons who no one would miss who are hoping to get rich out of it.
So morons.
Prometheus really should be a streaming series. Gritty modern version of Forbidden Planet where humans go looking for trouble to understand our origins and how all of it is related to several other hostile species? Kino.
I hope so. Lindelof, if you're reading this, I think you're a lazy fricking hack. If that weren't bad enough, I think you're a coward, too. Many of your scripts come right up to the edge of making a bold statement that you either don't have the courage to make or lack the inclination to because you realize how the point runs counter to your own stated beliefs. That's why the characters ib your stories come off as plot-driven robots instead of living, breathing people. A skilled writer can craft a metaphor without sacrificing the verisimilitude of the characters involved. You are not such a writer.
makes no sense that weyland who was looking for immortality would bring along a bunch of morons. obviously he was desperate and would have spent his entire fortune trying to live.
prometheus and covenant were only possible due to horrendously inept and moronic characters. 99% of the deaths were caused by mind boggingly stupid decision making.
Friends wanted to do an Alien marathon since they've never seen the movies before and wanted to do them in chronological order. Though knowing Prometheus was first I convinced them to start with Alien.
>it's not like you have a map if you're making the map.
the "professional mappers" already did their job mapping everything the second they threw some drones up in the air to scan everything autonomously, though. They just couldn't read the maps "they" drew. Who the frick would waste the fuel on sending some people that superfluous into space?
Ive always wondered what that thing is behind teh aliens head in the aliens poster? is it a stubby arm? a xenomorph walking stick? is he sticking a gun in his mouth in a suicide attempt?
the Alien series has such interesting lore but it's such a shame most of what came out of it is trash. how could they allow this to happen? i'll never understand
Prometheus is one of the most idiotic science movies ever made. Apparently in the future only people with below-50 IQ will be allowed to be astronauts.
>tech becomes easier to make and market >competing countries in space exploration >eventually corporations get involved as negotiations are made to secure financing and trade equipment and advisers >companies begin competing for rights to space travel and cargo >begin hiring people of lower quality to compete at cost >mistakes are made
I still dont think a corporation would hire anyone this dumb tho
This was supposed to be a top secret science mission of the utmost importance to the Weyland corp, and they send a bunch of legally moronic truckers to do it.
>Biologist touches the first thing that moves without thinking it could be caustic, acidic or whatever >Cartographer gets lost the moment he's alone
Jesus Christ such awful movie
What's dumb is you could just slightly modify the scene to obtain the same outcome but not make them seem so monumentally stupid. Even if they make some mistake it could be an honest one instead of the equivalent of sticking your arm in a blender to check if it's working.
Like maybe he doesn't try to pet it, just observe it a little too close, and is distracted somehow either turning back to the other guy or turning to get some tool and as he turns back it jumps for him. Or he holds up a tool to study it and lets his hand drift a little too close. But just not "he sticks his hand in this vegana bug snake alien's hissing mouth".
One of the problems is they made those two people utterly unlikable. Overconfident, arrogant idiots bragging about how smart and great they are, how much they demand to be paid, how they aren't gonna wait around to die, and are the ones left behind because enormous stupidity. Yet they wanted the audience to give a shit about them? And have the guy who was so scared, start smoking weed in his spacesuit? Wow, so cool and edgy. It's just terrible filmmaking. Probably the worst characters of all the movies.
Then it doesn't stop with them, all the other characters are just as shit, like the black captain who barely does anything in the movie except when he just has to call the Charlize a robot and she fricks him, the ultra religious couple constantly having existential crisis and demanding immediate answers about God or freaking out whenever they find something, and most others are just very forgettable.
It’s funny how a lot of terrible scenes are only terrible because the writer insisted that something they want to happen HAS to happen onscreen, when simply removing the stupid character contrivances and letting the ending of the scene play out as it is would achieve the same effect without forcing audiences to
wonder what the frick they just watched.
The chase scene with little girl Leia in Obi-Wan is a perfect example of this. Instead of having a stupid chase scene for the sake of having a chase scene, they could have just began the scene with Leia being surrounded by the dudes, and then immediately have her abducted and bagged in a sudden manner. It would make the scene shorter, but the end result is the same and audiences get what happened.
What was the point of having a stupid chase where we see grown adults struggle with jumping over a tree branch and running as slowly as possible?
>What's dumb is you could just slightly modify the scene
The scene was, originally, written to be perfectly reasonable. It was modified by the LOST writer to be the moronation that made it to theaters.
The movie was unmistakably an Alien movie. The original script was just about the titular aliens happening and killing all the engineers. It has the engineer waking up for all of five minutes before he dies. He lashes out at the humans for pulling him out of stasis, kills the security team and dies from a chestbursting alien, which was the entire reason he was in sleep to begin with.
The script rewrite made him just tard out for no reason.
You should read both scripts. Spaiht's sounds like an intelligent, erudite adult wrote it. Lindelof's sounds like an ADD teenager read Spaiht's, snorted some coke, and set into "improving" it.
there's a small problem with that, at the begining of the movie, when they're gathered together...they recognize each other as famous people of each of their fields
I don’t know biology that well so I am probably wrong, but doesn’t it make a home in the chest, between the lungs and grows from there?
Wouldn’t the intestines be in the way?
I guess it could just eat them and move them around?
I think it coils itself around the neck and make them unconscious to subdue the host and make it less likely to be removed.
I think they could do it but it wouldn’t be ideal, the host would freak out and try to remove it.
They probably should have went for Gigers design for part 3. It had female lips and would stick it barbed tongue down your throat and pull out your insides.
maybe it's linked to sensors all over the ship
or it's supersensitive
eg sound and vibration go very well through metal, and is easy to measure with an accelerometer, even through a thick ass metal wall
and metal walls and beams changing temperature often make sound
now, a microphone with clever signal processing certainly can do it too
Covenant was so terrible that it's legitimately impressive. It one-hundred percent obliterated every aspect of Prometheus that was actually good, killed all of Prometheus' interesting sequel hooks off-screen, amplified all of Prometheus' fatal flaws, and badly shoved in generic xenomorph action. It might be the worst sequel I've ever seen.
I didn't even finish Covenant and never looked back. I gave up when original David appeared to save the day. I thought the crew of Prometheus was peak moronation, but the crew of Covenant surpassed them easily. I coulnd't believe what I was look at. When original David appeared to save them from the tiny aliens in the field I just gave up.
>action
Don't forget the part where the weapons used during that action were just some generic tacticool AR shit you could see posted on /k/ as a troll because it looks like shit. How the frick do you do a sequel to Alien filled with shooting and NOT design some cool gun for it?
I still say the encounter with the Queen was a completely contrived situation thrown in just so Cameron could have a big bullshit fight at the end. If Newt hadn't been captured, there would've been no reason for Ripley to go back. The Queen would've been blown up and that would've been it. Newt's entire purpose was simply for that fight to happen and to have a cheesy motherhood theme.
The worst part about Prometheus isn't even the moronic plot, it's the moronic set design. Instead of following the iconic tech and interior design that's been present in every other movie they filled the ships with fricking holograms and sleek touch screen shit, making it look like a Minority Report sequel instead of an Alien prequel. It completely broke the visual design elements that SHOULD have anchored the movie to the rest of the series and for what? Because Ridley couldn't believe that anyone watching the movie could believe it was taking place in the future if it didn't have touch screens and a bunch of soulless CGI shit going on? So fricking stupid.
I agree, although some people defend this discrepancy by arguing that the Nostromo is more of an oil tanker and Prometheus a private jet so naturally it will have cooler tech.
>a ship filled with undereducated space truckers would have ship computers that require you to memorise and write all kinds of commands for every function of the ship, rather than a touch screen interface with sliders and holograms to more easily see projected paths or ship schematics for easier loading of the ship >not even fancy corporate ships from a hundred years in the future have them, so it's not a status thing either
Those people are moronic. The only possible explanation would have been if all the holograms and touch screens started fricking up due to interstellar radiation that nobody on Earth planned for. That could have lead to their problems because the ship crashes and they lose their competent team leader and end up fodder because they're panicking as well as have explained why the future tech is so chunky: Space-EMP protection.
I think it's more that he's such a legendary filmmaker that nobody wants to tell him when his ideas are fricking stupid. Who the frick thought the alien spore dust in covenant was a good idea?
>yeah but what if instead of you getting raped by an alien and having eggs deposited inside of you that burst out of your chest you just sort of get some gravity-defying goo in your ear and then it bursts out of your SPINE?
The part that loses me is how the spores move around like an animal or something it's just so God damn fricking stupid. The idea of having infectious spores itself isn't terrible I just don't understand why the frick Scott thought that was a good way to do it.
Infectious spores are scary in stuff where you slowly start sprouting mushrooms or a whole ship gets infected by someone breathing. It doesn't work in a universe where "infection" always ends with you getting ripped apart by some big alien thing wanting to get out after it's done gestating. Spores just don't fit at all.
I doubt a third of the stuff that ridley is blamed for is his og creative decision
he himself described movie making as fighting the studio for every inch and hoping that maybe the final result will be any good, it's just an exercise in concessions and compromise
I am of course paraphrasing from memory but you get the idea
he's a legend cause he's efficient and professional
that being said this shit might very well be his idea, remember that quote from cameron that he would do everything in cgi if he could have at the time he made all those great movies
>Hey let's follow the clearly insane android that just evinced complete disregard for the death of my crewmate and actual, voluble anger at the death of an alien monstrosity through his creepy future Frankenstein lab past his horrifying da Vinci-esque drawings and down into his spooky cellar and, at his bidding, walk over and stick our face over the decidedly egg-like pod on the floor. While we're at it, let's not recoil in even the slightest horror when it blossoms open in reaction to the presence of our unprotected face.
guy was religious, his faith shielded him from any doubt
he didn't hesitate to instantly drop the established, painstakingly picked and extensively scouted and agreed upon by thousands destination planet for a space fricking colony to some random off chance dice roll for no reason
Let me explain something to you about faith. No one, and I mean no one who isn't a God-touched saint, believes that their faith is going to protect them from a clear, present threat. This isn't a fricking vampire movie, and no one so delusional would have ever risen to second-in-command in the first place because that self-same sense of pious invincibility would have long since gotten him either killed or barred from advancement. Atheists should never try to write religious characters because they have no grasp of the subject matter.
>paycheck.
Isn't he like 80, the frick he needs money for? Not sure how the same guy that made duelist made the worst theatre experience i've had with prometheus.
He genuinely wanted Prometheus to be good. His fatal mistake was trusting that hack Damon Lindelof to fix his script instead of fricking it up even more. Everyone connected to Bad Robot/JJ Abrams is a a cancer to the film industry.
It's like they add extra things just to make them dumber. Like in Alien, Kane, who is not a scientist, makes the mistake of examining the alien egg and assuming it's dormant like the rest of the ship, then not backing off as it opens, the facehugger suddenly leaps for him, melts through his helmet and facehugs him.
Imagine if instead, he just said the air is breathable enough, and takes off his helmet so it gets him even easier? Or it opens, the facehugger climbs out, looking like the vegana spider from hell it is, and stands there looking like it's going to pounce, and he goes "Goochie goochie goo!" and tickles its little clitoris face before getting facehugged.
It really seems like they had these scenes where certain plot points had to happen, and then they added the most moronic shit to get to them. Like Charlize Theron dying because she can't figure out to run to the side? Why not just have her run to the side like Rapace does, but just not make it in time and get crushed?
Yeah that was the scene where I checked out. When characters who are sold to you as the best of the best have a sudden IQ drop of 80% so the plot can move on
Here's my Aliens flick: > humans invent stuff that resists xeno acid > they build power armour out of it > they kill the bugs for 90 minutes > its a chore, no humans get killed
its boring you say? well so are xenomorphs so its fitting
This entire film did nothing but insult the intelligence of the audience throughout. Everything from that stupid space penis, to using that shitting aging makeup instead of hiring an age appropriate actor, to that ridiculous scene where the idiots run in the same direction as the rotating space ship about the crush them, all insufferable garbage.
I wish they would just take Aliens to the natural next step and give us AVP in space. It would be good for another 3 films at least which would course correct the franchise and put their financials in the black for at least a decade.
I've been hearing tgat Giger and others designed "Aliens" as an analogy to how a rape victim feels like, and to make men understand that. How true is that?
This guy is moronicly rich and this is his one and only shot to become immortal. He has only a certain amount of crew slots and almost infinite money to fill them. Would he really stack his team with absolute morons who fold literally the very first time they are called to perform their job? And if the writer says yes, then they made a stupid, fricking bad story that is worthy of being mocked.
oh yeah those two cowardly fellas that were shitting bricks the entire time suddenly gained courage when an alien lifeform shows up.
The biologist gained courage, the other one wanted to frick off.
I liked how the map specialist or whatever the frick got lost, and all his specialist skills and proficiency amounted to throwing a bunch of drones that one time
they spent money to send him to outer space to do this
He was a rude butthole with jail tattoos who said he was there to get some money.
Disposable.
I’m mean he did map the area, the ship got the maps.
He technically did what he was supposed to do, it’s probably just a bonus the moron got lost and died.
Wasn't that because they decided the smartest decision would be to start smoking drugs?
He just couldn't resist
Absolutely fricktarded writing.
I like this movie as background noise but this was a huge plot hole that made no sense
I was memed into watching this by Cinemaphile and was bored the entire movie. Nobody told me this was just another Alien sequel either.
Uhm ... actually it's a prequel
no its not, the tech is more advamced and the space jockey of the first movie was bigger and fossilized
Star Wars prequels are still prequels even if the ships are more sleek and cool looking
Is that ship actually in a star war movie?? it looks liek a toddlers toy
Yes. It's the ship he's in when he says "Now THIS is podracing
>it looks liek a toddlers toy
Star Wars was created to sell toys to children, anon.
Subhuman taste
It looks sleek and classical
George Lucas was inspired by the look of classic cars. This is intentional. He wanted the ships to look more artful before they were mass-produced and industrial (X-Wings, TIE Fighters etc) during the Galactic Civil War. I also thought this didn't make sense until I heard this in one of his interviews recently.
According to the deletes scenes the engineers in this movie were a sub race created by the original engineers, which we never actually see. So yeah the big fosilized guy in alien might as well be one of the originals
There's no way Ferris Bueller was set in the past. Their depiction of Chicago was far more advanced, futuristic, and civilized than the Chicago of today.
Fricking hell.
Same here. I skimmed the sequel afterward and it also sucked
Lets be honest here, if no one was looking you'd try to frick it, I know I would.
considering its strong enough to stay your arm I don't think I would, no
>considering its strong enough to stay your arm
I-Imagine just how firmly she'll latch onto your dick, haha... n-no would ever want t-that.
it will rip your dick off easily.
Xerecobra.
I think Prometheus was a comedy.
Srs why was it so goofy?
Idk I wouldn't care so much about the plot holes or stupid shit that doesn't make sense like the scientists taking off their helmets if the characters were good but I don't think there is a single likable character in the whole movie. I guess the robot is okay but everyone else I hated. Whiney female main character with annoying accent, her dickweed boyfriend, the c**t leader of the mission, the token black guy, the butthole scientists, none of them likable or interesting.
Unintentionally, but yeah.
Kek, Tarantino btfo hard this movie
Only thing he blows is wieners.
What does it do inside a person? I never understood that part. Does it just curl up in their intestines or something and wait?
dont think the snek really wanted to kill him.
he just happened to scream when it slid up and so it confused his mouth with a tunnel.
It supposed to be a parasite that feeds on its host until its ready to find its own food.
Desu, knowing massive historical frick ups the idiocy of the scientists in these films isn't that comical.
for example
Anon, this was overconfidence combined with boredom about a process repeated hundreds of times... I don't think it's comparable to literally mankind's first contact with alien life, which also just happened to visually resemble one of the most aggressive and deadly animals found on earth.
>which also just happened to visually resemble one of the most aggressive and deadly animals found on earth.
which is?
When 'tickling the dragon's tail', always remember to use the damn spacer bars incase your hand slips... Or you'll get a leathal dose of radiation that will sicken and probably kill you slowly, painfully, and in a horrible way.
>several people told him he'd kill himself handling it in such a moronic manner
>while handling it in said moronic manner, he did in fact, kill himself (in 9 days)
Who could have foreseen it?
>Duh me hit with rock
>make ball do nuclear fission
> project has untold millions in funding (back when millions was actually a big amount)
> NAH ILL USE THIS SCREW DRIVER
> kills himself hurts others
Fricking idiot
Boy, I sure could go for an ice cold bottle of Coca-Cola™ right about now!
What is this?
a spicy wiggle.
Imagine being this new
the crazy part is that a year earlier another person died from it, literal death wish to frick around with it
at lest he flipped it fast enough so everybody there didnt die with him
That was one helluva spicy rock.
Someone please... What is this?
the demon core, google it
Google is your friend, newbie.
>well the air is breathable right here, so let me remove my oxygen mask before walking further into this cave
Surely this has never caused any deaths on Earth.
>demoncore-chan
I didn't think that was a real name but just some filename so I didn't google it. Damn you. You made me newbie it. Damn you all!
>2018 meme
Ok, buddy.
>2018 meme
what did he mean by this
>obscure new-ish meme
Gee, I dunno. Something about someone tickling their own tail, I'm sure. Imagine my surprise that it would be the same preening groaners talking about the unrealism of this documentary series known as Alien.
what the frick is this guy going on about? can we get a tardwrangler in here to translate?
level 4 tard wrangler here, i have no clue. need at least a level 6 to decipher that mess.
"Tickling their own tail" is a reference to the postmentioned meme. Calling people a newbie for not knowing that 2018 meme. It happens to be, to my surprise, the same people preening, meaning basking in their own glory, over this movie not being a documentary.
Consider yourself wrangled, tard.
>Calling people a newbie for not knowing that 2018 meme.
Except that didn't happen anywhere except in your schizoid mind.
schizoid and schizo are different things
You'd know from personal experience, I'm sure.
yea, i'm a psychologist
>anywhere
Oops.
>Google
Still using google. KYS now anon
what am I looking at here?
Like someone who is specialized in making maps and scanning caves getting lost.....in a cave with ultramodern equipment ? Biologist who wants to pet a giant snek while he would never do something like that on earth?
>Biologist who wants to pet a giant snek while he would never do something like that on earth?
Dude, I know atleast three Herpetologists personally, who died trying to pet snakes.
Reptile fans are weird.
I went to a reptile expo for the first time last weekend. Weird vibe from the diverse attendants. I concluded that the distinguishing feature of that subculture is a particular sadism. They enjoy watching their reptile eat living things. Perhaps your friends secretly wanted to be eaten themselves, in a sexual way. Weirdos.
>tfw no reptile fan gf
The only one I know came super close to death when he got the species wrong and thought it was nonvenomous.
>tfw botanist
I frick up an ID, the worst that happens is I get yelled at a week later by an old lady.
>I know atleast three Herpetologists personally, who died trying to pet snakes.
Petting a snake vs petting Alien unknown species from another planet.
I mean it is set in the future, and zoomers are really fricking dumb, imagine how stupid their children and their grand children are going to be.
If i watch the movie from this perspective it becomes kino.
>massive historical frick ups the idiocy of the scientists
Donal Rusk Currey gets boring instrument stuck in an area where he is studying and documenting really old trees. Whatever let's go to the National Park Service and get a permit to cut that thing down and get my tool back, grab some forestry boys and cut that b***h down.
Wew that was a lot of work, start looking at the tree, huh that is a lot of rings, start looking more, frick that is a lot of rings, start counting more and more. Frick, frick frick. OK no one say anything. Inform a few other researchers and NPS and NFS no one really wants anyone to know that the oldest non colonial organism was just killed, shit leaks out years later and causes a shitstorm in the 60s.
Yeah he killed the Prometheus tree (funny given this thread) 5000 years old. They didn't find anything older until 2013, 9 years after his death
I hope a tree fell on him
Fricking. A.
Look at the state of woke scientists today, now imagine another century of that shit.
The map scene made 0 sense, the guy literal uses those orbs to scan the place the ship even detects it and Idris says "i'm reading you guys there's something moving". Then for some reason he gets lost the guy with the map.
It’s about on par with the demon core, like hey guys, let’s do experiments with a nuclear bomb core and will use screwdrivers to keep it from going critical.
I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really don't understand who signed-off on that crew being acceptable in any way, in any universe.
weyland picked a bunch of disposable morons because his goal was to become immortal
And how would crewing a ship with retads be beneficial to his goals?
because they're just competent enough to get him there and easily disposed of
It's been a while since I watched, but wasn't it either implied or explicitly said that the expedition wasn't expected likely to return? So the crew were basically all the most mercenary and willing to risk everything for a small chance of a big pay day.
The crew weren’t told where they were going and what the mission was.
All they were told was that it was a two year journey in hypersleep to the destination. Mystery mission that could be a break through, probably told they would be rich/ famous and two year hypersleep journey back.
So I doubt the top scientists agreed to go.
>Send morons to die on alien planet
>???
>Immortality
it got him an audience with an alien life form. sadly his robot fricked up the translation
David did it on purpose. He very much wanted them all to die and continually tells them how disappointing it is to hear how fallible his creators are.
>DUDE WHAT IF ALIENS WERE ALL REFERNCES TO HUMAN GENITALIA AND SEXUALITY
Giger was a hack homosexual
have a nice day Black personnuts
>Giger was a hack homosexual
He was based, and you're c**t for even calling him that.
moron
>hey lets touch the snake in this hostile planet
the scene on the bluray where the biologist finds the baby worms in the atmosphere processing room that don't attack him should have really been left in
I think I saw that in the original cut. They used regular earthworms or mealworms for that scene.
in the original they only appear in the scene where the crew unknowingly steps on some of them in the dirt, there's a longer scene where the biologist takes samples of some after holloway takes off his helmet
bro ill sock an alien creature in the fricking face
I hate how people try to make Promotheus part of the mythology. when i watch Alien, i dont keep this movie mind as a prequel or even the sequel with the queen life cycle. There is no way this dumb fricking albino from Cinemaphile is in any way the same being in Alien.
That's for sure
They show him get into the pilot position / exo suit.
And it blatantly looks different from that elephantine alien fossil from Alien. It's a lameass retcon.
The Engineers from Prometheus are not the same alien race as the Space Jockey.
There. I fixed the continuity with this one neat trick.
bruh they turned the "space jockey" into a space suit.
The idea of the jockey being a suit was around a long time. I liked it and was excited to see them actually use it even if the end product wasnt that great. I think everyone's problem with these ideas is that movies are forced to have one canon so now suddenly all follow on movies and content needs to incorporate this stuff even if you preferred the old canon. I kinda hate that this is the way, it upsets some fans and stifles ideas. The comics and books and such were free to run with any idea or weird concept they wanted, creating dozens of different continuities that could be fun or lame. If only there could be a regular canon that could get its new alien 3 sequel, and a prometheus canon for those who enjoyed that, and whichever other ones that fans would enjoy.
>this wrong idea was around for a long time
uh huh.
the civilization on display in alien engineers life to suit specific purposes. the aliens were a weapon.
>If only there could be a regular canon that could get its new alien 3 sequel
Oh god, not this shit again. Frick off, Neill.
It's better than what we have now which is nothing and Alien is stagnant. There's a new tv show coming out but I have little faith it will be good.
the last solid decade of absolute garbage should've been enough to convince you that, no, something is not necessarily better than nothing.
There's 200 years worth of room between 3 and Resurrection. They could do anything they want. Trying to make a pale retcon/reboot sequel that rehashes Aliens and its characters would be about as stale as any other idea they've had since. I'm fricking sick of people pushing that idea.
Alien 3 isnt canon anyway. It was obvious that they made it back to earth after Aliens. Sure, i'd be fine with another Alien movie near to that time period that has nothing to do with Ripley.
Go back to bed, James. You've had your moment. It's done. Deal with it.
>Alien 3 isnt canon anyway
still better than aliens, though
I love seeing the absolutely unhinged contrarian takes on here. They're always so funny.
go watch the assembly cut. completely different movie.
I don't care about contrarianism
aliens is utter, worthless shit
what in the actual frick do you consider a good movie then?
I legitimately love the assembly cut, It's not contrarianism for me, I just really prefer 3's style and mood. It's more in line with the first one in terms of dialogue and characterization.
>Frick off, Neill.
I thought we were talking about the William Gibson script?
The space jockey clearly was biological. the chest wound clearly shows it didnt burst out of a spacesuit.
That's fine? They're just what if scenarios to explore what is a fun explanation for the mystery. The comics also did the elephant man that floats around with high technology and it was pretty silly
I want alien 4 sequel
I like all 4 alien movies and I wanted to see what happens when they finally reach Erf after like 350 years or however much passed since alien 1
I heard that they worship the space jockeys or want to emulate them. That is still moronic and the mere idiocy of it makes me dismiss the film further. Also, i shouldnt need to read a fricking production book to understand what the mythology of the film is.
>the sequel with the queen life cycle.
There is a painting(?) of an alien queen in the room where they find the alien canisters, so NO, David didn't created the xenomorphs
Im talking about Aliens. I take the Xenomorph as it is presented in the first movie without the ant-hive explanation. If anything, i take them as self replicating as implied in the deleted scene with dallas.
Oh I see.. but I disagree, if there is no alien queen then how do you explain the millions of eggs the nostromo finds in the abandoned ship?
Black person the aliens are a weapon system, not a self-sustaining species.
Its up to your imagination. It could be a war ship or the xenomorphs could be bio-engineered creatures. I personally believe them to be a combination of biomass and artificial materials. I believe the ant colony explanation just reduces them to dumb animals (which are easily dispatched by gunfire in Aliens). I see them in the same way as tetsuo the iron man or the ending of Akira; able to consume or integrate artificial materials into itself or create a habitat or eggs from them as well biological material.
>this dumb fricking albino from Cinemaphile
Cinemaphile can only wish that they looked like this big homie
Good to see Michael Rapaport still getting work.
Is it true that the guy who designed the alien universe, drew them as a fetish and you are actually supposed to be aroused by the xenomorph designs?
Put it this way: He put a pair of kissable human lips on his concept art for the Runner.
Look at his work. There are veganas and dicks everywhere. The port holes in the alien ship are basically veganas. The alien egg was supposed to look like a vegana too but the studio though it was too much.
>The alien egg was supposed to look like a vegana too but the studio though it was too much.
so they made it into a cross shaped vegana
exactly
>TIL that H.R. Giger initially designed the eggs from the Alien movies to look like a vegana; As there were complaints that Catholic countries would ban the film he doubled the lobes to four, so "seen from above, they would form the cross that people in Catholic countries are so fond of looking at."
>no veganas, Giger!
>ok
>cross vegana
Well, the alien ship gave it away from the start. That was a huge hint
whats the worst that could happen honestly
the guy was closeted gay. when it looked like a penis he was immediately drawn to it. when it expanded into a vegana, he was repulsed, but overcompensated by getting even closer, for fear of being outed.
kek.
You ever seen a vegana? Not for me. They feel good, though.
The funny thing is the guy that got attacked by it acted like he just found cute creature.
>he just found cute *penis
fixed that for you
if you saw a rattlesnake or some other kind of animal in the wild would you think oh let me pet it? this guy is a fricking idiot. But I think that was the point of his character. All the people there were supposed to be the worst and cheapest replacements for their competent counterparts.
if i'm gay and it looks cute and welcoming, like a penis, yeah
it doesn't though. and no that's not how being gay works yo fricking idiot
okay gay
> All the people there were supposed to be the worst and cheapest replacements for their competent counterparts.
that's a moronic meme
I doubt any really successful scientist would agree to a minimum 4 year mystery mission who zero details.
I think the ones that agreed were hoping to get money out of it.
They were enough to get the job done.
They probably would have killed them anyway if everything went right and weyland got immortality like he wanted to keep the secret. Probably would have sabotaged the sleeping pods or something.
I think the only people that would agree to a minimum 4 year journey on a mystery mission you find out about when you get there would be morons who no one would miss who are hoping to get rich out of it.
So morons.
Prometheus really should be a streaming series. Gritty modern version of Forbidden Planet where humans go looking for trouble to understand our origins and how all of it is related to several other hostile species? Kino.
The writer doesnt have a good track record with long running series.
I would be happy if Alien never got a sequel tbh
>its a bigger, badder alien
Cameron is a hack
He is, but the queen is still the best creature in the series.
It's the Royal Facehugger for me. I just wish it got more screentime in the assembly cut. It's a fricking great design.
It’s just a regular facehugger with some webbing
The has elements of the Queen's design suck as the side sacks resembling the shape of her head. It's subtle but I really like the way it was designed.
>The thing has
>such as
I don't type for shit today.
It’s pretty cool looking.
Manages to look even more dangerous and scary than the normal face hugger.
Imagine rubbing her ovipositor haha
reckon you could crawl up it and swim around with the eggs?
reminder: damon lindelof has been posting here since he got chased off social media while lost was airing.
I hope so. Lindelof, if you're reading this, I think you're a lazy fricking hack. If that weren't bad enough, I think you're a coward, too. Many of your scripts come right up to the edge of making a bold statement that you either don't have the courage to make or lack the inclination to because you realize how the point runs counter to your own stated beliefs. That's why the characters ib your stories come off as plot-driven robots instead of living, breathing people. A skilled writer can craft a metaphor without sacrificing the verisimilitude of the characters involved. You are not such a writer.
I don’t think that would be good for his self esteem lol.
Everyone here calls him a hack.
makes no sense that weyland who was looking for immortality would bring along a bunch of morons. obviously he was desperate and would have spent his entire fortune trying to live.
He only had days to live so he was desperate.
And I think they were the “best” who would agree to come.
prometheus and covenant were only possible due to horrendously inept and moronic characters. 99% of the deaths were caused by mind boggingly stupid decision making.
What a stupid movie.
They were high, so
Why did David do what he did?
because he was written by damon lindelof. there's no other reason.
it's cool to see him get what he fricking deserves in Eden Lake (2008), though (this is what I choose to believe)
Ridley Scott is in love with fassbender.
Friends wanted to do an Alien marathon since they've never seen the movies before and wanted to do them in chronological order. Though knowing Prometheus was first I convinced them to start with Alien.
i don't know why i'm only just realizing why everything is a prequel these days.
>wanted to do them in chronological order
Film series should be watched in release order, not in-universe chronology your friend is a tard.
What are you the film-watching police? Stuff wieners in your mouth. Chronological viewings are nothing new.
Neither is autism.
what a witty retort
How come the Xeno species never attacked or killed David?
Xenos don't get off on frick dolls, only the real thing
He is a walking water cooler to them, as long as he didnt frick with the nest directly they would ignore it because he isnt worth the time.
i assume the synth in Aliens only got attacked because the queen was pissed and lashing out at everything.
They don’t consider androids as alive for some reason never exactly explained.
das lifeist!
I don’t think the xenos give a shit about androids.
The queen only attacks bishop because he’s in the way.
i would frick it
>be professional mappers
>go map
>get lost mapping
probably happened at least a few times. it's not like you have a map if you're making the map.
>it's not like you have a map if you're making the map.
the "professional mappers" already did their job mapping everything the second they threw some drones up in the air to scan everything autonomously, though. They just couldn't read the maps "they" drew. Who the frick would waste the fuel on sending some people that superfluous into space?
Is it a benis or a bagina?
Yes
>change wallpaper
>see thread
Nice one, lads.
is that supposed to look like alien smug pepe?
Frick's sake, I can't unsee it.
Holy shit.
someone needs to make a Aliens style smug pepe now
Ive always wondered what that thing is behind teh aliens head in the aliens poster? is it a stubby arm? a xenomorph walking stick? is he sticking a gun in his mouth in a suicide attempt?
its making this gesture (pic related)
Which is the better cut of Aliens?
the Alien series has such interesting lore but it's such a shame most of what came out of it is trash. how could they allow this to happen? i'll never understand
Which species(female) from Alien franchise would be the best frick?
human
Prometheus is one of the most idiotic science movies ever made. Apparently in the future only people with below-50 IQ will be allowed to be astronauts.
>tech becomes easier to make and market
>competing countries in space exploration
>eventually corporations get involved as negotiations are made to secure financing and trade equipment and advisers
>companies begin competing for rights to space travel and cargo
>begin hiring people of lower quality to compete at cost
>mistakes are made
I still dont think a corporation would hire anyone this dumb tho
This was supposed to be a top secret science mission of the utmost importance to the Weyland corp, and they send a bunch of legally moronic truckers to do it.
they hired damon lindeloaf
>Biologist touches the first thing that moves without thinking it could be caustic, acidic or whatever
>Cartographer gets lost the moment he's alone
Jesus Christ such awful movie
What's dumb is you could just slightly modify the scene to obtain the same outcome but not make them seem so monumentally stupid. Even if they make some mistake it could be an honest one instead of the equivalent of sticking your arm in a blender to check if it's working.
Like maybe he doesn't try to pet it, just observe it a little too close, and is distracted somehow either turning back to the other guy or turning to get some tool and as he turns back it jumps for him. Or he holds up a tool to study it and lets his hand drift a little too close. But just not "he sticks his hand in this vegana bug snake alien's hissing mouth".
One of the problems is they made those two people utterly unlikable. Overconfident, arrogant idiots bragging about how smart and great they are, how much they demand to be paid, how they aren't gonna wait around to die, and are the ones left behind because enormous stupidity. Yet they wanted the audience to give a shit about them? And have the guy who was so scared, start smoking weed in his spacesuit? Wow, so cool and edgy. It's just terrible filmmaking. Probably the worst characters of all the movies.
Then it doesn't stop with them, all the other characters are just as shit, like the black captain who barely does anything in the movie except when he just has to call the Charlize a robot and she fricks him, the ultra religious couple constantly having existential crisis and demanding immediate answers about God or freaking out whenever they find something, and most others are just very forgettable.
It’s funny how a lot of terrible scenes are only terrible because the writer insisted that something they want to happen HAS to happen onscreen, when simply removing the stupid character contrivances and letting the ending of the scene play out as it is would achieve the same effect without forcing audiences to
wonder what the frick they just watched.
The chase scene with little girl Leia in Obi-Wan is a perfect example of this. Instead of having a stupid chase scene for the sake of having a chase scene, they could have just began the scene with Leia being surrounded by the dudes, and then immediately have her abducted and bagged in a sudden manner. It would make the scene shorter, but the end result is the same and audiences get what happened.
What was the point of having a stupid chase where we see grown adults struggle with jumping over a tree branch and running as slowly as possible?
it's called nuwriting
bends time and space and logic just to stick that square peg into the round hole
>What was the point of having a stupid chase
padding
Gotta pad that runtime
>What's dumb is you could just slightly modify the scene
The scene was, originally, written to be perfectly reasonable. It was modified by the LOST writer to be the moronation that made it to theaters.
this homie seeded this shit if he made it about engineers in the first place
The movie was unmistakably an Alien movie. The original script was just about the titular aliens happening and killing all the engineers. It has the engineer waking up for all of five minutes before he dies. He lashes out at the humans for pulling him out of stasis, kills the security team and dies from a chestbursting alien, which was the entire reason he was in sleep to begin with.
The script rewrite made him just tard out for no reason.
yea yea I'm sure it was a better script but I hate the idea of engineers in the first place
You should read both scripts. Spaiht's sounds like an intelligent, erudite adult wrote it. Lindelof's sounds like an ADD teenager read Spaiht's, snorted some coke, and set into "improving" it.
Umm, anon, that's clearly an average alien weiner snek. Very easily confused with its subspecies, giant penis uterus snek.
If you ignore the characters being moronic it's a pretty entertaining movie. It looks cool at least.
>extremely intelligent and advanced species
>resorts to throwing puny woman around until she kills you
God that sucked
What an inefficient use of cargo hold space, lol dumbass aliens
>entire expedition is a coverup for another mission
geez, I wonder why they would pick such crappy scientists
Sounds dangerous. What if one of those morons fricks up your mission?
there's a small problem with that, at the begining of the movie, when they're gathered together...they recognize each other as famous people of each of their fields
Where my trilogy bros at?
Could a facehugger implant an egg in your ass?
gays do it
such is life, in the clowny yuga
I think the embryo only needs to attach itself to your intestines and feed until its fully grown. It could work.
I don’t know biology that well so I am probably wrong, but doesn’t it make a home in the chest, between the lungs and grows from there?
Wouldn’t the intestines be in the way?
I guess it could just eat them and move them around?
I think it coils itself around the neck and make them unconscious to subdue the host and make it less likely to be removed.
I think they could do it but it wouldn’t be ideal, the host would freak out and try to remove it.
They probably should have went for Gigers design for part 3. It had female lips and would stick it barbed tongue down your throat and pull out your insides.
>would stick it barbed tongue down your throat and pull out your insides.
A better alternative to marriage
found out about it just now, thx
amazing, i love the creepy sexual mysterious serial killer alien, not the hivemind insect
aliens2 great film tho
also
if u dont like alien4 u were memed into it, its a good film, ur a sheep
>what does it key on?
>micro changes in air density
What the hell is that supposed to mean?
pretty self explanatory
No it’s not. It doesn’t explain how it works at all.
it actually does
sound, movement, temperature changes: all that makes air density change
So how does it magically make all those readings around the ship?
maybe it's linked to sensors all over the ship
or it's supersensitive
eg sound and vibration go very well through metal, and is easy to measure with an accelerometer, even through a thick ass metal wall
and metal walls and beams changing temperature often make sound
now, a microphone with clever signal processing certainly can do it too
Covenant was so terrible that it's legitimately impressive. It one-hundred percent obliterated every aspect of Prometheus that was actually good, killed all of Prometheus' interesting sequel hooks off-screen, amplified all of Prometheus' fatal flaws, and badly shoved in generic xenomorph action. It might be the worst sequel I've ever seen.
What a fricking image.
What a FRICKING image.
>I'm R.I.P.
GAME?
I didn't even finish Covenant and never looked back. I gave up when original David appeared to save the day. I thought the crew of Prometheus was peak moronation, but the crew of Covenant surpassed them easily. I coulnd't believe what I was look at. When original David appeared to save them from the tiny aliens in the field I just gave up.
>action
Don't forget the part where the weapons used during that action were just some generic tacticool AR shit you could see posted on /k/ as a troll because it looks like shit. How the frick do you do a sequel to Alien filled with shooting and NOT design some cool gun for it?
it was better than prometheus
and no the alien stuff isn't the reason, the david and walter stuff is
>all of Prometheus' interesting sequel hooks
lol
I still say the encounter with the Queen was a completely contrived situation thrown in just so Cameron could have a big bullshit fight at the end. If Newt hadn't been captured, there would've been no reason for Ripley to go back. The Queen would've been blown up and that would've been it. Newt's entire purpose was simply for that fight to happen and to have a cheesy motherhood theme.
oh yea the theme's whole reason to be was for there to be a theme what a joke apply yourself cameron
It's corny as frick.
Cameron is a hack and a thief
copying stuff is fine if it actually inspires you to take things to a new level
cameron steals, but he then turns up with the goods
>we need a bigger bug
yeah, i love aliens despite being 80s-type of corny and making alien into spacebug
i love the first concept of ending the 1979 one with alien killin Ripley and sending voice message with her voice that everything is fine
The worst part about Prometheus isn't even the moronic plot, it's the moronic set design. Instead of following the iconic tech and interior design that's been present in every other movie they filled the ships with fricking holograms and sleek touch screen shit, making it look like a Minority Report sequel instead of an Alien prequel. It completely broke the visual design elements that SHOULD have anchored the movie to the rest of the series and for what? Because Ridley couldn't believe that anyone watching the movie could believe it was taking place in the future if it didn't have touch screens and a bunch of soulless CGI shit going on? So fricking stupid.
I agree, although some people defend this discrepancy by arguing that the Nostromo is more of an oil tanker and Prometheus a private jet so naturally it will have cooler tech.
>a ship filled with undereducated space truckers would have ship computers that require you to memorise and write all kinds of commands for every function of the ship, rather than a touch screen interface with sliders and holograms to more easily see projected paths or ship schematics for easier loading of the ship
>not even fancy corporate ships from a hundred years in the future have them, so it's not a status thing either
Those people are moronic. The only possible explanation would have been if all the holograms and touch screens started fricking up due to interstellar radiation that nobody on Earth planned for. That could have lead to their problems because the ship crashes and they lose their competent team leader and end up fodder because they're panicking as well as have explained why the future tech is so chunky: Space-EMP protection.
>anyone watching the movie could believe it was taking place in the future if it didn't have touch screens
yes
Ridley is so out of touch with film making it's like he is following "How to be a film director for dummies"
He's also taking viagra for his limp dick. It perfectly explains the bluer tint his movies have now.
I think it's more that he's such a legendary filmmaker that nobody wants to tell him when his ideas are fricking stupid. Who the frick thought the alien spore dust in covenant was a good idea?
>yeah but what if instead of you getting raped by an alien and having eggs deposited inside of you that burst out of your chest you just sort of get some gravity-defying goo in your ear and then it bursts out of your SPINE?
The part that loses me is how the spores move around like an animal or something it's just so God damn fricking stupid. The idea of having infectious spores itself isn't terrible I just don't understand why the frick Scott thought that was a good way to do it.
Infectious spores are scary in stuff where you slowly start sprouting mushrooms or a whole ship gets infected by someone breathing. It doesn't work in a universe where "infection" always ends with you getting ripped apart by some big alien thing wanting to get out after it's done gestating. Spores just don't fit at all.
I doubt a third of the stuff that ridley is blamed for is his og creative decision
he himself described movie making as fighting the studio for every inch and hoping that maybe the final result will be any good, it's just an exercise in concessions and compromise
I am of course paraphrasing from memory but you get the idea
he's a legend cause he's efficient and professional
that being said this shit might very well be his idea, remember that quote from cameron that he would do everything in cgi if he could have at the time he made all those great movies
I find the cast of Aliens pretty moronic too for the most part. Saying that, they're military grunts rather than scientists so it should be expected.
Better still lets take our helmets off to drink in the heady aroma of this tiny area with breathable air.
Imagine if the dude in Alien had just taken off his helmet a second after he tells the ship that there's an artificial atmosphere down by the eggs.
Dan O'Bannon would have physically attacked Scott if he did something that stupid
Better still:
>Hey let's follow the clearly insane android that just evinced complete disregard for the death of my crewmate and actual, voluble anger at the death of an alien monstrosity through his creepy future Frankenstein lab past his horrifying da Vinci-esque drawings and down into his spooky cellar and, at his bidding, walk over and stick our face over the decidedly egg-like pod on the floor. While we're at it, let's not recoil in even the slightest horror when it blossoms open in reaction to the presence of our unprotected face.
I mean, what could possibly go wrong?
*hrrrbbblbgrrghghaaaa*
same energy
Exactly the same.
>his plan was literally "ask him to come with you and then ask him to stick his face in a creepy alien egg"
guy was religious, his faith shielded him from any doubt
he didn't hesitate to instantly drop the established, painstakingly picked and extensively scouted and agreed upon by thousands destination planet for a space fricking colony to some random off chance dice roll for no reason
Let me explain something to you about faith. No one, and I mean no one who isn't a God-touched saint, believes that their faith is going to protect them from a clear, present threat. This isn't a fricking vampire movie, and no one so delusional would have ever risen to second-in-command in the first place because that self-same sense of pious invincibility would have long since gotten him either killed or barred from advancement. Atheists should never try to write religious characters because they have no grasp of the subject matter.
It happens sometimes, anon.
Just don't stick your own snek into anything without asking the base doctor first, and you will be ok.
>gee bros the air seems breathable enough you know
*takes off helmet on an alien planet after five minutes*
Even space truckers in Alien kept their damn suits on. The facehugger was just able to melt its way through Kane's helmet.
Can we all admit Ridley is a hack and his brother made better working class kino for the masses.
Ridley's fricking great when he cares about a project. I honestly feel like he did the prequels for a paycheck.
>Ridley's fricking great when he's reeled in and propped up by other people
fixed that for you
You really didn't.
>paycheck.
Isn't he like 80, the frick he needs money for? Not sure how the same guy that made duelist made the worst theatre experience i've had with prometheus.
>Isn't he like 80
Exactly. He's in the "Frick it, I'll build me fortune and do whatever I like." stage of his life.
Sad, but you're right.
That's fricking funny.
He's such a cheeky c**t. I love it.
0 fricks given.
He genuinely wanted Prometheus to be good. His fatal mistake was trusting that hack Damon Lindelof to fix his script instead of fricking it up even more. Everyone connected to Bad Robot/JJ Abrams is a a cancer to the film industry.
It's like they add extra things just to make them dumber. Like in Alien, Kane, who is not a scientist, makes the mistake of examining the alien egg and assuming it's dormant like the rest of the ship, then not backing off as it opens, the facehugger suddenly leaps for him, melts through his helmet and facehugs him.
Imagine if instead, he just said the air is breathable enough, and takes off his helmet so it gets him even easier? Or it opens, the facehugger climbs out, looking like the vegana spider from hell it is, and stands there looking like it's going to pounce, and he goes "Goochie goochie goo!" and tickles its little clitoris face before getting facehugged.
It really seems like they had these scenes where certain plot points had to happen, and then they added the most moronic shit to get to them. Like Charlize Theron dying because she can't figure out to run to the side? Why not just have her run to the side like Rapace does, but just not make it in time and get crushed?
Yeah that was the scene where I checked out. When characters who are sold to you as the best of the best have a sudden IQ drop of 80% so the plot can move on
Is the planet that Prometheus takes place on the same one as Alien? I thought they were different ?
Here's my Aliens flick:
> humans invent stuff that resists xeno acid
> they build power armour out of it
> they kill the bugs for 90 minutes
> its a chore, no humans get killed
its boring you say? well so are xenomorphs so its fitting
Who would you cast as Amanda Ripley?
heath ledger
This entire film did nothing but insult the intelligence of the audience throughout. Everything from that stupid space penis, to using that shitting aging makeup instead of hiring an age appropriate actor, to that ridiculous scene where the idiots run in the same direction as the rotating space ship about the crush them, all insufferable garbage.
Ridley lost it.
planet snek
the slithers sphere
I am real scientician
I wish they would just take Aliens to the natural next step and give us AVP in space. It would be good for another 3 films at least which would course correct the franchise and put their financials in the black for at least a decade.
I've been hearing tgat Giger and others designed "Aliens" as an analogy to how a rape victim feels like, and to make men understand that. How true is that?
>experts on EARTH
>NOOO WHY AREN'T THEY EXPERTS WITH ALL KNOWING KNOWLEDGE ON A NEW PALENET???
This guy is moronicly rich and this is his one and only shot to become immortal. He has only a certain amount of crew slots and almost infinite money to fill them. Would he really stack his team with absolute morons who fold literally the very first time they are called to perform their job? And if the writer says yes, then they made a stupid, fricking bad story that is worthy of being mocked.
>I am an electrician on Earth
>Therefore when I go to an alien world, I immediately stick my finger in the first plug socket I see
Logic
>morons from Cinemaphile don't know HR Giger designs have always been sexual
Great thread, everybody. Always enjoy talking to alienbros