>Harry, did I ever tell you about Time-Turners?

>Harry, did I ever tell you about Time-Turners? They are magical devices that allow the user to travel backwards in time. This incredible power can even be used to save loved ones from death, as you and your friends discovered with Buckbeak. Despite the fact that the Ministry has an entire closet full of Time-Turners, we never once thought to use one to end Voldemort’s reign of terror. It would have been as simple as using one right after he killed one of his victims, say, your parents, and then lying in wait to ambush him before he showed up. Alas, time travel is simply too dangerous to meddle with. It must only be used for the express purpose of allowing a little girl to take extra classes one semester, and only if she is a good friend.

  1. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    >6 million, Harry? Haha, don’t be ridiculous !

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      >ONE POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EACH israelite KILLED IN THE HOLOCAUST

      • 3 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Snape rises.
        >"According to consensus by virtually all historians and experts on the matter, slightly less than six million israelites perished in the Holocaust from the year 1941 to 1945. Thus, you have awarded Slytherin nearly six million points and they have decisively won the House Cup."

        • 3 months ago
          Anonymous

          >ZERO POINTS

        • 3 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Oh yes yes Severus...
          >Now let's look at the NON-muggle historians
          >0 points to Slytherin!!

          • 3 months ago
            Anonymous

            they deloused their clothes and fed them so it should be like -1000 points at least. i mean thats just my opinion THOUGH

  2. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    I don't care if it's a children's series, Rowling is still fucking retarded for not once considering the implications the Time Turners might pose for her magical world. If she thought for just literally two minutes she would have realized it wasn't a good idea to introduce them, but she's apparently incapable of thinking.

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      Only anal retentive autistic weirdo lawful gooders can use them because they’re too concerned with paradoxes to seriously attempt to change the timeline

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      And the eagles could’ve flew the ring to mordor

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      The issue is that the first 3 books are in fact children’s books. They were whimsical kids fantasies so they weren’t supposed to make a lot of sense. Then starting with the 4th one she decided to turn into a dark gritty fantasy war series but still had to deal with the earlier books not matching the tone.

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      Time travel is a closed loop..

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      >makes beloved children’s series
      >arguably the most famous books since the Bible
      >includes numerous plot holes and logic loops that completely undermine the narrative
      >and yet nobody cares and kids keep reading it well into their 40s and buying all her merchandising crap
      When are you going to learn that a good story and a cohesive story are not one and the same at all times

  3. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    >ps i could have stopped tom at any point that i wished during his time here at hogwarts, but alas he was my favorite student, as you are now 🙂

  4. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    I love the part where Rowling realized how many plot holes the time turners will cause so she has Neville Longbottom accidentally bump into a cabinet that somehow has every time turner in existence and destroys them all

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      Fucking Neville what a clod

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      He should have used a time turner he got from his future self to go back in time and prevent himself from destroying all the time turners (and to give his past self one of them so he could go back in time and do the same thing, of course).

  5. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    It doesn’t cause paradoxes though. Buckbeak was never killed. A bunch of wizards probably tried to go back in time and were killed by random shit every time.

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      you're assuming that the events in the movie are the furthest into the future things can be. just because we never saw him get killed, doesnt mean it didnt happen. it happened, so they went ack in time so it doesnt happen

      • 3 months ago
        Anonymous

        >just because we never saw him get killed, doesnt mean it didnt happen
        ok but it didn't happen
        I don't know why we're even having this argument though since Rowling decided in Cursed Child that time turners CAN change the past after all

  6. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    I can't believe JK Rowling halfway through writing this didn't realize just how retarded it was

  7. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    >a good friend
    Dumby doesn't roll that way, chuddie

  8. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Professor, about those memories I saw, of Hogwarts in the late 19th century. Things were certainly a lot more... diverse then, weren't they? What happened?
    >Dumbledore looks directly into the camera and winks.

  9. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    do you think wizards and witches use the polymorph juice for kinky shit? imagine the possibilites

    • 3 months ago
      Anonymous

      yeah they probably even had sex and stuff lmao oh god

      • 3 months ago
        Anonymous

        wow imagine having sex

        • 3 months ago
          Anonymous

          no

          • 3 months ago
            Anonymous

            please

  10. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    THINK DRACO, THINK! HOWEVER

  11. 3 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Sorry Potter we just can't beat inflation. 2% is the best I can do. 1% if you really push it. But just for you we can arrange 0.5%.

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