HE WAS A CONSUL OF ROME!
HE WAS A CONSUL OF ROME!
This phonograph "reads" a rock’s rough surface and transforms it into beautiful ambient music pic.twitter.com/PYDzYsWWf8— Surreal Videos (@SurrealVideos) March 3, 2023
HE WAS A CONSUL OF ROME!
This phonograph "reads" a rock’s rough surface and transforms it into beautiful ambient music pic.twitter.com/PYDzYsWWf8— Surreal Videos (@SurrealVideos) March 3, 2023
By Juno's CUNT
Octavian btfo’ing antony is one of the best and most satisfying scenes of all time. I’ve banged 14 black women.
>Octavian btfo’ing antony
Gonna have to narrow it down there hoss
>They shall say you wear cuckolds horns; they shall say your wife betrayed you with a low-born plebe on my staff. You will be a figure of fun. The proles will laugh at you in the street. Your soldiers will mock you behind your back.
>Go on. Strike me. See what happens.
I'm convinced that every young Octavian fan is just a shotafag.
I understand that the point was to indicate his maturation from aspirant and idealistic youth to the cold-blooded pragmatism necessary to unite the empire, but the cast change wax particularly jarring. Especially since Pullo and Vorenus basically look the same for 50+ years.
Plus the actor didn't even look significantly older anyway, just completelt different. Also not sure why they bothered for just like, three episodes
It was jarring, but I think that was the intended effect and also the right idea. But I also hate child actors, so I'm biased, even though young Octavian was actually good. But I couldn't see him projecting the same kind of youthful confidence I got from old Octavian. I don't know, it was like that actor was too much like Hinds. The difference to me is I remember young Octavian as that kid who impresses his uncle right before the seizure, like an owl in the dark of night. And then they hit you in the first scene with young Octavian casting a shadow against the sun.
So to me, it wasn't so much jarring as it was a welcome contrast.
It really was incredible. The way he puts everyone in their place with controlled anger is amazing. The whole scene is a watershed moment. Nothing was the same afterwards. It's a shame that we got it at the end of the final season instead of in the middle of the show.
>tfw no Antony Parthian campaign
>no Lucius Vorenus saying "LOOK AT THE FUCKING STATE OF YOU" callback
>no HBO kino battle of legions being overwhelmed with arrow volleys in open fields
Instead, we got the Battle of the Bastards.
>And then they hit you in the first scene with young Octavian casting a shadow against the sun.
The second actor really grew on me. He did a great job of balancing Octavian's calculated autism with his youthful impulses.
>Go on. Strike me. See what happens.
owo octavian is that an obelisk in your pants or are you just happy to see me
Best scene of the entire show and of almost all shows I've ever seen. No action, no big flashy cgi battles, no superhero capeshit, just very good actors giving out very good performances and it is more entertaining and compelling anything Hollywood produces in their factory floor capeshit/ star wars conveyor belt of shit.
Octavian cucking the senate was right on par
For me it was this one, where Pompey tries (and gives up) on pretending to be a lowly merchant and explains how he was defeated. Every turn of phrase, every freudian slip, it's all so kino
Would be cool to see what happens within Rome if Pompey actually won at Pharsalus
Hard to tell honestly, but I doubt he would kill Caesar outright, maybe send him somewhere far away. In any case, the Republic was at it's deathbed, so I doubt things would've changed in the long run
Literal gay, and really bad at both poetry and prose, which garnered ridicule
My favorite scene as well
Great scene but also really depressing, thinking about how far this great man has fallen and how fucked everything has become. That was one of the things I loved about Rome, the feeling of impending "doom" as the republic inevitably comes to an end, no matter how hard guys like Pompey and Cato try to stop it.
Did the Republic really end?
Octavian Caesar gave it a rebirth.
>Did the Republic really end?
Up until Diocletian the Romans still pretended to have a res publica.
Diocletian cut the bullshit and basically invented European feudalism.
THEN AGAIN - a woman's role has always suited you best
Truly one of the best scenes.
>strike me, see what happens
Meant to reply to
Octavian was such an autstic little manipulator, I loved him.
>fucks his sister
>confirms he creampied her
>then turns her dumbass plot around on her
Also Niobe got what she deserved. Even if she did believe Lucius was dead, fucking your sister's husband is just a trash move, and then she got her entire family in on the charade
IMO the overall best episode of the series. Season 2 was a bit spotty but this one was stacked with kino scenes.
Pretty satisfying to see /ourboy/ grow into an a sadistically autistic emperor
VETO THE MOTION!!!
>These being the words of Anonymous:
>When I was a newfag, I defended this board. As an oldfag, I shall not abandon it. I give sincere thanks to the Jannies, who have presented me (gratis) with the most promising theme imaginable. I address (you) directly, Jannies. Please read as if (you) had a sense of humour, and were not merely Discord-obsessed sissies on a power trip.
>(you) are certainly not without accomplishments: it is a rare chud that can boast of becoming a eunuch before even coming of age. (you) have brought upon us cancer, Reddit tourism and BBCposting. (you) are /misc/'s Anthony Burch. But then again, a cuck's role has always suited (you) best.
Did nothing wrong
This man blackens his eyes with soot like a prostitute.
And what of good Vorenus?
Very gaulish looking fellow altogether
I assure you he's as roman as roman bread
He may have a gallic look about him but he's as solid a roman as we are
not content to let our Great Father die, he started a damn war on the Aventine that threatens to engulf the whole fucking city!
It's been 6 months, I can almost rewatch Rome again
you know what? that's not a bad idea.
just started my rewatch. gf's first time seeing it and she's loving it.
>watching Rome with a gf
the height of kino consumption
I hope your girlfriend dies in 1 month.
YOU SICK FUCK
ATIA OF THE JULII, I CALL FOR JUSTICE
Fuck this bitch for all eternity
And what of good Solonius?
Holy shit this made me
Laugh like a little girl thank you
Thank you for making my day
GOOD SOLONIUS STANDS WITH EMPTY HANDS
>make rome thread
>anon from that thread makes another one
Janus protect you
A TRVE ROMAN THREAD
FOR TRVE ROMANS
THIS POST WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY
>Cool it with the anti-Semitic remarks
The acting is top tier, but the writing is a bit inconsistent. I'd say Rome is overrated by the board, but underrated in general
It's super rushed feeling. And the forest gump style coincidences nag at the suspension of disbelief.
Eh that was part of the premise really
Titus and Lucius were the only two Roman soldiers mentioned by name in Caesar’s diary so they used them as the window to see the major events of the time through
>Titus and Lucius were the only two Roman soldiers mentioned by name in Caesar’s diary
Could you imagine the feeling? To be "mentioned in dispatches" by Caesar himself? 2000 years later we still speak their names, and every student of Latin (a diminishing population, to be sure) learns them just as they learn "All Gaul is divided into three parts".
>Vorenus and Pullo appear in Caesar's Commentarii de Bello Gallico, Book 5, Chapter 44. The episode describes the two as centurions, approaching the first ranks, who shared a bitter personal rivalry, and takes place in 54 BC when the Nervii attacked the legion under Quintus Cicero in their winter quarters in Nervian territory.
>In an effort to outdo Vorenus, Pullo charged out of the fortified camp and attacked the enemy. Pullo cast his javelin into one of the enemies from a short distance, but his belt was simultaneously pierced by a spear, preventing him from drawing his sword, and he was surrounded by other Nervii. Just then, Vorenus, following Pullo from the fortifications, reached the site of the mêlée and engaged the enemy in hand-to-hand combat. After slaying one of the enemy and driving back the rest, Vorenus lost his footing on the irregular terrain. As the Nervii drew closer to him, Pullo came to his aid. After slaying many of their opponents, the two retreated to the fortifications amidst roaring applause from their comrades, or "covered with glory," as described by Caesar.
>Vorenus then disappears from history. However, it is known that in the Civil War of 49 BC, Pullo was assigned to the XXI Victrix Rapax, a new Italian legion commanded by the legate Gaius Antonius. In 48 BC, Antonius was blockaded on an island and forced to surrender; Pullo was apparently responsible for most of his soldiers switching sides to fight for Pompey. Later that year, he is recorded bravely defending Pompey's camp in Greece from Caesar's attack shortly before the Battle of Pharsalus.
The quote itself was one of the original anime noble rivalries
Was Gilgamesh the world's first buddy movie? Two men begin as rivals, enemies even... But grudgingly earn each other's respect.
Then they go on manly adventures.
But as one starts to die, the other moves heaven and earth to find a cure for death itself. Failing in his quest, he realizes that Civilization allows us all to leave our mark on eternity.
[of course to say I'm paraphrasing is an insult to paraphrasing]
Yes, this was unironically one of the tropes I had in mind. I think there is an ancient evolution of these epic relationship between chads that to is still continuing. Gilgamesh and after that the Iliad, probably influenced the culture of people not even know these works existed. I think reading ancient stories is a better way to enjoy the modern ones. Discovering narrations so similar to things more moden we already know is every time a blast and is interesting. Probably some "virtues" are somehow also universal and imprinted in the blood of humanity, that dream to be better in valor even if for frustation usually fall in the opposite of that.
history does not repeat itself
it always changes enough to not be predictable
the Gilgamesh myth is a ruinous tale
no synthesis, no catharsis. just mutual chaos
ayy "god"-kings can suck my fucking dick
>«In that legion there were two very strong men, Titus Pullo and Lucius Vorenus, centurions who were reaching the highest ranks. The two were in constant antagonism as to who should be placed before the other and each year competed for promotion, with fierce rivalry. While fighting bitterly near our defenses, Pullone said: "Do you hesitate, Vorenus? What rank do you expect as a reward for your valor? Here is the day that will decide our disputes!" That said, he leave the defenses and throws himself against the enemy line, up where it seemed densest. Not even Vorenus, then, remains within the wall, fearing the judgment of all, he follows Pullo. At short distance from the enemies, Pullo throws the javelin, and hits one, which was at the head; the comrades help him, fallen and dying, protecting him with shields, while all together throw darts at Pullo, preventing him from advancing. Indeed, his shield is passed from side to side and a small javelin is planted in his belt, moving the sheath of his sword: thus, while he tries to draw it with his right hand, he wastes time and, in the obstacle in which he finds himself, he is surrounded. Immediately his rival Vorenus rushes and helps him in that difficult situation. All enemies immediately converge on him, neglecting Pullo: they believe him to be pierced by the javelin. Vorenus fights with the sword, hand to hand, kills an opponent and forces the others to retreat slightly, but, carried away by the heat, falls headlong into a ditch. He is surrounded in his turn and finds support in Pullo: both of them, unharmed, take shelter within our defenses, after having killed many enemies and having obtained great honor. Thus Fortune, in their challenge and contention, disposed of them in such a way that each brought help and salvation to the rival and that it was not possible to judge which of the two, by value, would receive the prize for the deeds. "
(Gaius Julius Caesar, De Bello Gallico, V, 44.)
>it's super rushed feeling.
Only the second series. They knew they had to wrap the entire story up.
He had 5 seasons planned and the set burned down. It was already the most expensive show ever filmed and they couldn't afford rebuilding the set so they told the creator to wrap thing up in a season
They had to rush parts of the story because they found out they were going to be cancelled.
Yep, S4 would have been Sextus Pompey’s attempt at revenge against Rome for his father’s betrayal and death
S5 would have been Jesus
Rome was one of the most enjoyable shows I have ever watched. It's a real shame they couldn't take it to completion.
Yeah, I know. It's still the main problem with the show.
You do this vileness before my anons
it was written by garden gnomes. its a disgrace to roman history (garden gnomes hate rome). the acting and set pieces were top tier though.
You could see the pathetic gnomishness seeping in by how much they were shilling the myth of the "virtuous garden gnome" in the middle of season 2. The reason Rome took over the gnomish kingdoms in the first place is because they were corrupt rape-filled hellholes run by barbarians.
>"virtuous garden gnome"
Which one? The religious hypocrite or the murderer-for-hire?
Idk, I never got the impression that it lauded the garden gnomes over some of the more virtuous Roman characters. I mean the garden gnomes in S2 are pretty directly portrayed as murderous terrorists. It's been a few years since I saw it though, admittedly.
Every garden gnome in the series is portrayed as a vulgar subversive foreigner who only cares about money.
iirc they were supposed to be setting up season 5 which was to take place in jerusalem
it was gonna go
season 2 ends with brutus and cassius getting thrashed
season 3 and 4 was gonna be egypt stuff
season 5 was gonna be jerusalem and end with the birth of Jesus (cringe, right?)
If Season 5 rumour is to be believed, I think it could have been kino because there were a few really big gnomish revolts around that time that had Roman Generals and big names in the area dealing with the revolts, putting them down and ending up being Emperors.
You're talking about Vespasian, and his son Titus Flavius who was also a general dealing with the garden gnomes at that time. They're both cool but it would kind of be boringish since Vespasian sort of just walked into Italy and swept everyone aside after Otho and Vitellius had been having a backstab orgy for the last year, and then his reign was kind of peaceful and good so...
I dunno not much to write about.
>The reason Rome took over the gnomish kingdoms in the first place is because they were corrupt rape-filled hellholes run by barbarians.
Not barbarians, just traitors. Basically every garden gnomes was courting foreigners and rebels in order to take over the country, and eventually one of those foreigners was a Roman who simply conquered them.
take your meds sirs
>its a disgrace to roman history
Sure, the dates are compressed and events embellished. I can't think of a single historical depiction that doesn't deviate. I like how they portrayed the militarism and patrician/plebian dichotomy.
Misguided villains. Cato was an idealist to a fault, clinging to a rotting republic was rotting away but doing little to stop it. I understand the reservations to Caesar and what precedents he might set, but Caesar was actually attempting badly needed reforms. Also, Cato sabotaged a compromise deal that would've prevented the civil war in the first place.
BY IVPITER'S COCK, SOMEONE CASTRATE THIS PLEBEIAN!
It was illegal to castrate a Roman citizen, plebeians included brotha.
Spartacus (the Kubrick one)
Spartacus the show
The decline and fall of the Roman Empire
Ben Hur (Heston version, the newest one sucks but there is a kino scene of Roman legionaries marching and singing cadences you can watch on YouTube)
Good thread this.
Shame, shame on the House of Ptolemy for this barbarity
I AM A BASTARD SON OF DYS!
Just a reminder that Rome was originally supposed to be a lot more depressing.
>Stevenson revealed what had once been intended to be the very first scene of Rome—as well as the series’ “ultimate end.” The point that Heller and Stevenson always saw the series building toward.
>“Bruno [Heller] once did outline a story that he was going to start the whole series with,” Stevenson said. “An 88-year-old Pullo going down to the riverside by Vorenus’ tomb, or sarcophagus, pouring wine on it, taking a sword out while sitting there on the banks, looking at the glistening river, and committing suicide.
>“And as he has his face hit the sand on the banks, a fish jumped out of the water, and the silver light on the fish caught the sword, which brought us right into that first battle with Lucius Vorenus and [Titus Pullo] where he breaks ranks.”
>As according to Stevenson, the final scenes of the series would have eventually explained this fate as the relationship between Octavian, who is only a child when Rome starts, and Pullo becomes clear.
>Says Stevenson, “The reason was that the only person on the planet who [knows] the Emperor Augustus to be human, who was Octavian, is Pullo. And Pullo’s the only one who has that memory of him or that life. And basically, [Augustus] asks him to. Nobody else could kill him. But at that stage, Octavian is obviously in his paranoid imperial sort of thing, and Pullo is the last tie to that time when he was a boy. It’s genius.”
This is high kino, is there anyone left who can make television this good anymore?
Anything this expensive can no longer get through the 'department heads' desk without incurring a serious gender and diversity rewrite.
People don't care for historical kinos anymore, they just want capeshit and fantasy. It's over for our kind.
>ANY MOCKERY OF THE garden gnomeS AND THEIR ONE GOD MUST BE KEPT TO AN APPROPRIATE MINIMUM
He sounds as fat as he is and I love it
CARMELLA HE WAS A CONSUL OF ROME!
Well anon? Have you?
She really got sidelined in S2. They gave her almost nothing to do so she just turned into a bitchy wine aunt.
I PISS ON THE THIRTEENTH
>I PISS ON THE THIRTEENTH
WHAT DID YOU SAY bro?
I am just now watching this series and I'm mad there's only two seasons
I hated Lucius but loved everything else about the show.
Pathetic, embarrassing opinion. Lucius was Roman as could be. I’ve banged 14 black women.
>Lucius was Roman as could be
Clearly has a Gallic look about him.
bruh his autism was one of the best parts of the show
I don't think kids with bad fathers find the idea of pater familias very entertaining
Fortune pisses on you, anon.
>Is there some...other form of law? You wretched woman?
But did he ever had the making of a varsity gladiator?
It's not true. I was promoted all four campaigns.
yeah but he had no backward compatibility.
I really need to watch this show again
it's been too long
Vorenus reaction when he throws the head away always makes me laugh, his face is like "nooo, not my decapitated, rotting comfort head :("
Deserved much worse tbh
Pullo snapping and killing her is an amazingly acted scene. Ray Stevenson is too underrated
>mfw he shows up in Dexter as a primary antagonist
It's amazing that he never got bigger roles. We need a Raynaissance.
Trips confirm it
We were robbed of Stevenson as Victarion
don't bring this fantasy capeshit here
fortune piss on you
May Concord fuck you in the ass
he was good in those Thor movies until that fag Taika killed him off with no fanfare in Ragnarok
his real name is Taika David Cohen btw
I was keking hard at normalgays going "le first polynesian hollywood director". And of course be was gnomish
That movie is a cancer. "Let's have a movie where everything Thor knows and loves dies all around him and he's just cracking jokes with his new diverse group of friends!"
he was barely in those movies and died like a bitch, hopefully at Ray's request since they just used him as a redshirt caveman
>murders her before she dies of blood loss
>tosses her corpse into the mud by the Tiber to be picked at by dogs
Pompey always said the caesareans were a glorified crew , it's simple we assassinate and do business with whatevers left
>But then...but then...
shit my tunic
I watched this series before I knew anything about Roman history and it's still one of the best shows I've ever watched (first season at least).
Should I watch this show? I heard it was cancelled halfway
I AM A SON OF MOOT
I FUCK HIRO IN HER ASS
Wretched villains or misguided heroes?
they were based
Hearts were in the right place, wasn't their fault they were going up against the main character of history.
Shit I meant Caesar not the fat crier, he's based as fuck too though.
cicero was annoying, got what he deserved
agreed his "philippics" against Mark Antony were juvenile rants barely worthy of Cinemaphile[nel].
but the man knew his audience, of IQ-90 central Italians.
>man who revolutionized the idea of rhetoric
>changed Western oral tradition for centuries
>one of the few voices of reason in the Late Republic
ultimate pleb opinions
The writers really ruined his character in the show.
Good acting tho.
He was really just a stand in for the senate as a whole, hence all the self-serving turncoating.
Yeah, he was too foppish and incompetent. Could've showed him tutoring Octavian for a while, and how much he struggled to let his mentor be murdered
I like him honestly, even if he was arrogant and a hypocrite, but he had his heart in the right place, even with probably the worst allies in history. His speeches are quite entertaining too, if a bit too self-serving
"i mean who hasn't ?" - cicero's defence as an attorney when his client is accused of raping an actress
Cicero was the political glue that held the republic together. In the show he was given far less gravitas but still my guy none the less
Villains. Monarchy or bust.
A bit of both. As portrayed in the show, their virtuous ideals are offset by their tactical incompetence and being out of touch with the people. This was expanded on near the end of the season with the liberators justifying their attack on ceasar as populist when it's clear they caesar was the populist and they were just protecting the aristocracy from reform.
I think you missed the point of the show
these were not times of heroes and villains
it was a time of gods and men
Cato was an insufferable cunt and deserved the end he got
Pompey was largely just manipulated
Cicero's heart was in the right place but he overestimated the Senate's principles
The republic could've used a return after the reforms Caesar or even Octavian was doing for the masses since a stronger republic could've probably saved Rome from at least a few of the massively retarded guys who came to power down the road, so I'm gonna say somewhere in the middle.
Julius Caesar soiface
why does HBO shit out such kino miniseries or series that get canceled early? I'm just about finishing up Generation Kill for the second time, holy fucking shit is it kino. Rome is my next rewatch and I just know it's going to be kino all over again.
More like Trombley?
>TEMPO TEMPO TEMPO
I am assured that Generation Kill is based as fuck and will be recognized as such. I am assured of this.
watch Carnivale S1, then complain to me
then watch S2 and realize HBO is always right
Sulla or Caesar?
What was his problem?
Being too based
this guy was the worst part of season 2. not believable at all. that fag who played Agrippa was almost as bad
Victory is not victory, until it has a song.
War songs don't have to be good. They only have to inspire soldiers to kill. Right there, in the moment. Or celebrate their victory, and it only has to be good enough to drink to. Every other Ukraine story is some
>they hit us
>we hit them
They got a menagerie of flying capital ghosts and one mass Tolkien reference. We lost part of the human spirit when we forgot how to speak. Ukrainians would fight how much harder if they had modern-day Maecenas? Now we're just goldfish people and soldiers only have attention span to listen for the next arty barrage
For me, it's Posca. Unironically one of the best characters in the show.
He fell off hard after S1, but his dynamic with Caesar was 50% of his appeal
based general posca
They say slaves talk of courage as fish talk of flying
What happened to Pompey's wife and children? I don't think we see them again after he's killed at the beach.
Ptolemy raped them
The fat little inbred? Doubt it, Pompey's kids could've probably beat him up, I get higher rapist vibes from the eunuch.
I was joking
Why is Rome so based?
Personally I believe that our "Great Filter" event as humans is the failure of Roman civilization to render politics moot.
Yes, I'm an idiot. Yes, I'm retarded.
But an unquestionable world empire ruled by an unquestionable emperor before modern sociopolitical concepts even had a name... Now it's too late. Everyone is entitled to everything and we have clever little handles and tidy little political parties and thousands of nationalities. We'll fight one another to oblivion over the last lump of coal.
Verification not required.
Help me anon, I would be a great emperor of all humanity, I know because I've played EU4
>I've played EU4
Years ago I would use the console commands to set up the start of the game so the Roman Empire never fell. It took me hours.
Only then would I begin.
wtf are mods even?
I'm not a video games guy.
I read online that you can use the console to put the Roman Empire back together - one keystroke at a time. And then you can rewrite history.
It's the least I can do.
They added a custom nation mechanic, so you can easily create it.
Also It's a formable nation, you can form italy and then reform the empire when you reconquer the territories.
I know in my head this is the correct word... but in my heart I know those territories still belong to The Empire.
yes the R*man empire was so amazing that it collapsed so hard that nobody even remembers how to speak its mercantile language which it spammed to 3 continents and an Abrahamic religion
they had slaves and didn't industrialize
the only civic tradition they had was the legion and that failed
we don't even use anything like their laws lmao
the only thing Romans ended up with was an influence on the architecture of the Capitol
also a friendly reminder that Western civilization would not have survived without monks on the FRINGES of you the remains of your shitty republic-memeing empire
didn't read lol
nobody stands Roman anymore
nobody should want to
Where do you think you are?
>we don't even use anything like their laws lmao
One of the most important exams you give in law school in europe is called "roman right", you fucking inbred ignorant moron.
>falling for obvious bait
>Is there some...other? Form of law? You wretched woman?
fucking europoors lol
English common law and Napoleonic Code are much more relevant legal concepts. But hey, keep sucking Classical dick I guess. Best version of your civilization anyway
>something that happened 200 years ago is more true to this day than something that happened 2000 years ago.
Any more genius takes anon?
I'm not the one praising ancient, inherently misinterpreted legal codes of authoritarian slavers for which we hardly have any reliable historical record. Roman law is history, not legal study
>but muh colonization
Come on, you can do better than that
>Roman law is history, not legal study
But it literally is
>I'm not the one praising ancient
You are the one showing your ignorance.
Yes, there are more relevant legal systems... that doesn't make Rome irrelevant
> for which we hardly have any reliable historical record
Fucking lmao, whatever, I hope you are baiting, or underage.
One of the first things you learn in any class about an Ancient/Classical topic is the unreliability of the historical record. Do you come from an alternate universe where the Library wasn't burned?
Most people don't understand that letter for letter, word for word, the majority of our Roman corpus comes from.... stone inscriptions.
Graffiti and resumes.
I simply don't believe there's enough historical record for Roman law to merit as a serious influence on modern Western law. Maybe some middling influence on English common law with the reinvigoration of the pater familias concept. Even then, I'm of the opinion that English common law spiritually appeals mostly to anglo countries (best West), which I don't associate with the continent. I guess you could say the modern French ideal of equality comes from Roman times, which led to the modern American ideal of equality...but that's a stretch, from Roman "equality" to American freedom.
Like I said...columns are all that remain of Roman influence. But beautiful columns they are.
>HE'S RIGHT BEHIND ME, SOMEONE KILL THE GOYIM BEFORE HE GRABS M-
This is in my top ten favorite images of all time.
It's a good one
Why are those Nazis harassing Nick Kroll like that? Didn't they love his hit kid's show Big mouth?
The weak garden gnome fears the STRONG MED GRIP
Stop saying med gay. Only nafri morons say that to include themselves in aryan European history
I say that, and I'm not a nafri moron so that's clearly not true.
> in aryan European history
I hope this isn't an attempt at we wuzzing.
>I'm just trying to grab this denarius I dropped on the groun-
>I SAW IT FOIST YA ANTI-SEMITE
Your caption made me laugh so hard I choke on my shrimp
what is he doing? Getting ready to fist fuck him?
And what of good Craterus?
What is the sauce for your gif?
Why are Romans so kino, lads?
Romanaboo will shill hard this tv series but say that Christian Roman Empire was the best
>say that Christian Roman Empire was the best
Who the fuck would ever say or think that?
The Eastern Empire I expect.
Christian larpers who love Roman Empire and never go to the church, shill every christian kingdoms, and convieniently forgets the Latin Empire but will blame Arabs, garden gnomes and Turks for the fall of the Eastern Roman Empire.
Dying empires are more interesting than healthy ones
Shitty degenerate collapsing state, but the Christian goths were better then the OG Roman’s. Gothic honor is where chivalry came from and they saved the west from the ultra rotten degenerate late stage Roman Empire
True. Gothics, Vandals and other Germanic tribes always treated better the locals than Romans themselves. When the Byzantine came back in Italy they actually made it worse for the locals.
Its almost like most people dont like to be ruled by globohomo empires and want some kind of liberty for themselves.
Aside from the standard of living in Rome or the good laws, are oligarchic empires really needed even in ancient times ? They tend to create more harms to smaller comunities and benefits only the capitals and prefects.
Was the Roman Empire ever great for the conquered ?
>Was the Roman Empire ever great for the conquered ?
>The roads go without saying obviously
I need to rewatch this kino.
When the Byzantine came back to Italy, there was also plague, famine, cold winters and new barbarian hordes.
But they were the foreigners themselves in Italy.
Many generations passed between the first king of Italy to Justinian, the average Byzantine didnt even spoke Latin but Greek. Latin was only used by nobles and patricians.
Famine, plague or not I doubt that they would even kept the territories given how already the locals in Africa didnt wanted Byzantine rule or that the Persian were pressing them in the east + the Franks beginning to be more and more powerful.
>"religion" not found
what a fucking pathetic analysis
there is no doubt that the ByzBoys couldn't hold Italy, but it's not like everyone welcomed the raping heretical pillagers just because the language changed
there were HUGE, meaningful divisions in the Great Schism which occurred over many decades of intra-faith meetings that can't just be waved away with "they got used to it"
>they actually made it worse for the locals
yeah those foreign invaders imposing heresy really took the edge off
are you out of your mind?
The Byzantine were more zealots tho, they burned most of the pagan litteracy and ancient greek knowledge.
Arabs burned Ancient knowledge and Byzantine pagan rituals died with Julian the Apostate, which didn't have huge implications on Italy
>Byzantine pagan rituals died with Julian the Apostate
Eastern Romans depended on Pagan law instructors to teach Roman law classes in Byzantium until the "Byzantine Dark Age" when formal education ended in Constantinople.
Pagan rituals survived for beyond Julian.
common rituals =/= elitist theology
Does Skull and Bones influence Southern Baptism? I hate modern elitists almost as much as I hate historical elitists. Because it's even MORE pathetic to project your own intelligence onto the majority of dead people. History is downstream from anthropology and Medieval historical records aren't much better than Ancient/Classical records
I was thinking of Irish monks, but it wasn't Turks who attacked Alexandria, now was it? I don't really think saving an extreme minority of historical content excuses burning down the library.
>thread is dead
Romans deserve to be remembered, but not this enthusiastically
Turks arent Arabs, but yeah Umar Ibn Khatab ordered the burning Alexendria's library to heat the town or something along those iirc.
Alexander's Library was burned like 6 or 7 times before that, its not like it set back human civilisation for centuries.
What really was a waste were the one burned out in Europe during wars against europeans or just for heresy or the one in Bagdad which was on the silk road where many many scholars and merchant would exchange knowledge.
Just reread some stuff about the burning of alexandria attributer to Umar, so its apparently discutable since numerous sources dont actually have sources on that and mainly those who says that he burned it to reheat the baths are 1850 englishmen who loved to romanticize the middle east (np with that personally loved what the british can do in a desert setting).
Even at the time there wasnt records that really said that happened...
I’ve heard by the time he burnt the libraries the majority of the archives had been destroyed anyway through a series of fires and earthquakes over the years and not recopied like they used to be.
>man-made atrocities equal natural disasters
>didn't even follow the post
>just believe less accurate records lmao
>Arabs burned Ancient knowledge
Wasnt them and Irish monks that bought and kept the Greek knowledge from the retards from Byzantine who loved to burn pagan stuff ?
Thats why we talk about a Golden Age in Islam for centuries before they went to shit and started to be way too much into religion and destroy themselves because Arabs cant fucking live with each other.
Yeah, the Romans imposing their gods on everyone was a bit fucked tbh
First of all Classical roman rule /= Byzantine rule.
Second of all
>When the Byzantine came back in Italy they actually made it worse for the locals
And third, the byzantine came at the worst time possible, with the plague, a famine, the eurpion of a volcano that darkened the sky. Possibly the worst period in human history. Even if the locals perceived the things getting worse, was it really the Byzantine's fault?
Large taxation by Justinian and my source is Precopius even tho he himself was very partial against Justinian and overexagerated the outcome and destruction of Italy in the Gothic wars. He is right on how bad taxation was on the people of Italy.
Well, yeah, so taxation during a period of complete exonomic disaster was bad.
Was it really fault of an empire existing though? Seems a lot like a consequence of plague+famine stretching the empire's treasury very thin.
it's certainly not a good argument against the roman empire as a whole.
It is the worst time to raise taxes in these case. Justinian didnt graps economics that well and was hell bent to refill the Imperial Treasaury and more than before the Gothic Wars in Italy.
>Vandals and other Germanic tribes always treated better the locals than Romans themselves
this is just wrong, the vandals were notorious assholes to basically everyone in northern africa and that is part of the reason why belisarius had such an easy time taking it back from them
>No season to see the change of Octavian into Augustus and his Reign
>Instead HBO invested in fucking GOT
>HE WAS A CONSUL OF ROME!
what was the ptolemaic shitlord's problem anyways
>yeah lets just behead this consol that'll make cesear love us
100% wanted to start a war with the Ptolemaic kingdom, Pompey's death was convieniant.
In an earlier scene, he said that Pompey was too dangerous to be alive and even lashout on Pullo and Lusius for not killing the poor Consul.
>still believing cesearian propaganda
protip: history is written by the victors
Cesarian propaganda actually say that Caesar was in his absolute right to avenge a friend and Consul from his country.
The most probable thing was they neither were friends and Caesar wanted more power in the most ressourceful place in the mediteranean sea.
>Why would someone kill the enemy of the most powerful man in the Mediterranean
Gee, maybe to curry favor? As to why it didn't work out, either
or because it prevented Caesar from being able to pardon Pompey and end the Civil War peacefully.
>Caesar from being able to pardon Pompey and end the Civil War peacefully.
This, Caesar was big on pardoning. The classic "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer" move.
I dont know if pardoning would work with Pompey, he was a man of honor and was willing to fight to the bitter end.
Either option would be good for Caesar, he would either be seen as a leader who forgave his enemy or as a leader who was forced to kill the man he wanted to pardon.
Pompey being killed by a third party was absolutely the worst option.
What guarantee Pompey would never turn on Caesar while he slowly becomes a Tyrant/King ?
Pompey killed in battle is a good outcome.
However him getting killed by a third party whose province controls most of the grain in the med sea is actually the best outcome.
It wouldnt actually suprise me that Pompey was assassinated by Caesar's and put the blame on the Ptolemaic nobles as a false flag operation to keep the war in his favor against the Catonians.
>It wouldnt actually suprise me that Pompey was assassinated by Caesar's and put the blame on the Ptolemaic nobles as a false flag operation to keep the war in his favor against the Catonians.
Considering Caesar had the de facto leader of the Optimates on the ropes, and how poorly the Siege of Alexandria went, I find it highly unlikely this would be the case.
Considering Pompey's terrible position and their previous relationship, there's a decent chance he would have gone for it, if Caesar offered it, which is still a matter of debate.
No man of honor and conservative like Pompey, especially during the end of his political career, would accept that from a man trying to destroy the Republic.
Maybe he would disenbowl himself like Cato.
If he was such a optimates idealist and honour compelled man he would have fallen on his sword in Greece, Pompey was hardly a die hard republican. Had Julia lived he probably would have retired from public life with his beloved bride. It was only by circumstance, or fate (and a good measure of personal pride), that he found himself as the defender of Rome opposing Caesar
>If he was such a optimates idealist and honour compelled man he would have fallen on his sword in Greece
Wouldnt be more fit to him to never stop fighting and comeback to fight for another day ?
He was an honorable man, but not a stupid idealist like Cato.
I would agree that he would've accept to be pardonned by Caesar but its not unlikely that he would eventually form some Legions and be a pain in the ass of Caesar at some point.
It looks better for him to give clemency for his enemies to end the civil war quickly but it in the long term, it would just give more time for his ennemies to plot or preparing another war against him if he gets too much power.
i claudius > rome
i say this as a rome enjoyer
All these anti-semite Rome fans and none of you mention the human being who scattered the tribes across the face of the Earth?
No mention of the man who said "Enough of this bullshit. Send them away"?
There's a reason we do not get Hadrian kino, lads.
May his bones be ground into dust
this show turned me into a rome-enjoyer and i even made a trip to rome (the italians call it "roma" by the way)
and it was one of the best experiences of my life
There was an elevated garden in the roman forum where you could see the forum and all of the city, with the colosseum and all, and I teared up when I saw it.
Also the Vatican museums have the highest concentration of art I've ever seen in my life.
>Also the Vatican museums have the highest concentration of art I've ever seen in my life.
>walking through like 2 miles of tapestries to get to the sistene chapel
its like out of a dream
based, I'm gonna watch the Aurelian episode later.
Aurelian is my favorite historical figure and it's not even close.
The ending might make you cry anon.
>search up on roman emperors
>a bunch of them just ruled for 5-10 years then get assassinated and replaced by someone else who will rule for even less time and also be assassinated
Shit was fucked up
>AND STILL FUCKING YOUR MOTHER
shockingly good thread btw
its pretentious as fuck but better than starwars marvell garbage at least
you're an armchair historian with no credentials or actual interesting knowledge
still better than starwars
What the consensus on Philip the Arab in here?
I fucked Mary Beard. That's my credential.
godawful, why cant women truly appreciate ancient history without making all about their festering cobweb encrusted vaginas?
The leading Merovingian scholar is not only an out-and-out Marxist, but he only presents his scholarship in a Marxist context.
It drives me INSANE... but that's his point, to fuck over people like me who just want to learn.
if this is pretentious then you just need to go back to the capeshit star wars threads
>if this is pretentious then you just need to go back to the capeshit star wars threads
>Considering Caesar had the de facto leader of the Optimates on the ropes, and how poorly the Siege of Alexandria went, I find it highly unlikely this would be the case.
sucks being a high iq autist forced to be around low iq autists
in real life
Are you implying the Siege of Alexandria went well? Yes, the Romans won, but Caesar almost drowned, and was bailed out by Mithridates
>but Caesar almost drowned
When he fell out of the canoe?
"Africa, I have you now?"
>oh shit this is a bad omen
>gotta think fast gotta think fast
God he was good
>When he fell out of the canoe?
Maybe that. It was when the Romans tried and failed to take an island in the harbor of Alexandria. During the retreat, Caesar fell out of the boat, had to remove his armor, then swim across the harbor back to their position in the palace. You do know the Romans were the besieged during the Battle of Alexandria, right?
>Africa, I have you now?
That was later, on his way to Thapsus and the last of the Pompeians.
Your knowledge is far superior to mine and I'm jealous, quite frankly.
>Your knowledge is far superior to mine and I'm jealous, quite frankly.
you realize that wikipedia is just one click away?
I've been freestyling this whole thread, homie.
I assumed everyone else was, as well.
I wasn't far off.
>watched a few minutes of the first episode
Why does it look and feel like amateur trash? Like it's punching above its weight? "Hercules: The Legendary Journeys" looks better.
>That moment when Posca negotiates with Herod and gets cheated out of more money by the king garden gnome
Have all of you mastered Ancient Roman history moreso on your own or through formal education?
minor in Classics from a fancy college
plus thousand of hours on my own
it's been worse for my career than my various substance abuse issues
>plus thousand of hours on my own
>Definitely on my own recognizance
Definitely on my own recognizance, as I recall in my (American) high school we barely glossed over it in World History courses, though we did read Shakespeare's play in an English class. University probably had better options for classical learning, but alas I went into business school like a chump.
>on your own
I'd hire a HS grad over a c*llege student nowadays
And anyone claiming to have mastered Roman history (outside of Gibbon and Syme) is Dunning-Krueger.
It's impossible. The Church politics of the 4th and 5 Century alone are killers.
I read The Skystone so I'm pretty sure I've mastered Roman history
I read it for the sex scenes then stayed for the history.
>My turn! : P
>ALL MOCKERY OF garden gnomeS AND THEIR ONE GOD SHALL BE KEPT TO AN APPROPRIATE MINIMUM
Gaius and Aulus, bros for life.
How'd that other one go?
"Farewell wonderous femininity, from now on I'm penetrating men?"
Something like that was written in Pompeii.
>Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men's behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!
>>Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men's behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!
based and butthole pille4d
ALL ACCOUNTS OF CESEAR WERE WRITTEN BY CESEAR
stop buying into the 2000 year old propaganda bros please
If augustus didn't reveal that he was a hack when he took power, it's reasonable to assume he wasn't a hack and he wasn't lying when describing himself as the CHADDVS MAXIMVS
avgvtvs only exists because of the genius of the general who won all of his battles for him despite his incompetence and im too much of a pothead to remember his name
I never claimed augustus was a great general, just said that if it was all propaganda, after Caesar's death he would have been exposed.
I mean, obviously, a man isnt great at everything.
An intelligent man hiwever surrounds himself with capable administrators and men who makes results. Being surrounded by Yesmen who suck your cock and let you do bad decision is the mark of a great leader.
i hopped a fence in pompeii and got to see some shit they wont let the public see for about 10 more years
theyre really holding out on the good stuff
Sulla did nothing wrong.
neither did crassus, cicero, or pompAY i refuse to call him pomPEE fuck that
>one of the most kino speeches ever
>show glosses over it
>Romans conquer Britain
>Romans bring chieftain to Rome for parade + murder
>Chieftain sees Rome
"How can you, who possess such things, covet our poor tents?"
>Romans nod knowingly, but still want to kill him in the parade
"Why not let me live as a testament to the clemency and goodwill of the Roman people?"
>Fuck, this guy is good
>Romans let him live in splendor until the end of his days
>Enslave the British anyway
R O M E
Any kino roman movies or shows other than Rome HBO and Gladiator?
Anon, you are Spartacus.
Looks good but every show except Rome HBO depicts the Roman empire as an ancient evil oppressive Nazi kingdom. Kinda sucks but what can you do when the garden gnomes literally rule Hollywood and still spite the history and knowledge of Rome
S1 Britannia is good, S2 is okay don't think I'll check out S3 as that's where the stolen source material for the show ends
Will we ever get a Hadrian series?
The garden gnomes at hollywood would never allow it.
He was a choc full o nuts