>"Any man who would jump in front of a minivan for twenty grand, a bottle of pain pills and a Mini Thin is fuckin' crazy. Do you hear me? Is fuckin' crazy."
>My father won the real war. He killed Prince Rhaegar! He took the crown, while you hid under Casterly Rock!
Reminder that Tywin had no real response to this other than "t-the king is t-tired" and giving a hard stare. He got called out like a bitch.
>waiting and picking the winning side
sounds like Tywin did the right thing to me.
>My father won the real war. He killed Prince Rhaegar! He took the crown, while you hid under Casterly Rock!
Reminder that Tywin had no real response to this other than "t-the king is t-tired" and giving a hard stare. He got called out like a bitch.
>the Wildlings are at camp, showering Jon with gifts and the songs of their people >Jon smiles, enjoying this valuable cultural experience >a cry is heard in the distance >suddenly, the camera pans to the thundering stampede of a thousand men on horses >we see Stannis driving the men to fight by cracking a flaming whip >"FORM RANKS, YOU DOGS" >in the distance, Wildling women and children are burning, the soundtrack a high screaming wail >"TAKE THE WOMEN FOR OUR THRALLS," Stannis shouts, "FEED THE BABES TO THE FIRES" >"Yes," cries Davos, "R'hllor hungers!" >Jon looks on, his face grief-stricken >"Seven save us," Jon whispers, "he's even making the women and children pay the Iron price!" >after defeating the Wildlings, Stannis meets Jon on top of the Wall >"You're the oathbreaking bastard that killed the Halfhand and copulated with a savage Wildling. You're just like your retarded brother and useless father, a traitor and an oathbreaker. Give me one reason why I shouldn't behead you." >"I'm the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch!" Jon pleas >"Davos come here," Stannis beckons >Davos asks "Your grace?" >Stannis pushes Davos off the Wall. >"Melisandre, quickly, get my guards. Lord Snow killed my Onion Knight."
>finish watching a Game of Thrones >decide to go to movie theater >dress in my furs, boiled leather, and hauberk, befitting my status as a Northman >fill my pockets with roasted capon, and Frey pie, in case i get hungry >bring a skin of wine >my mom drives me to the theater, but I pretend she’s a destrier since Ned Stark’s mom never drove him >get in line to get my ticket >speak in a clear and proud Northman voice >the smallfolk distributing tickets clearly respect me, “Theater 3, ok?” >”The North remembers!” >witness what appears to be a Summer Islander accosting a fair maid >realize she will reward me with her maidenhood for helping >”Summer Islander, leave that chaste maid be. Are you of Jalabhar Xho’s tribe?” >he looks at me confused: “Yo wat dis cracka talkin bout?” >”You look strange without your feather-cloak, Summer Islander. Leave us.” >try to keep up a brave face, but realize the pie and capon have leaked out of my pockets and are overflowing from my sweatpants >”Yo dis cracka shit hisself!” >Other Summer Islanders suddenly surround me >Begin some sort of dance from their native isles, chanting “Woop there it is!” >Not sure what IT is, I attempt to escape and summon my bannermen >my cape gets caught on the door >slam my head and wake up in an ambulance >my mom is giving me a frustrated look: “No more watching Game of Thrones, Anon.” >”It is known, mother.”
mfw
>>fill my pockets with roasted capon, and Frey pie, in case i get hungry >not even a single rasher of bacon, burned black and fried in suckling pig juices with a side of spit roasted onions and tender pork loin swimming in grease and butter
But m'lord, the theatres have a no singles policy. How are you to purchase your rasher of bacon if they will bar the doors at your approach? Mayhaps it is time to consider wedding, m'lord... I hear there are many fine ladies at the Twins, and generous, mayhaps even so much to grant someone such as yourself their maidenhead.
Ask him "who are you" And if he says grandfather to the king you say "gotcha". Because you got him right where you want him.
And who are you
the proud King said
that I must bow so low?
"I don't understand the question. I am the king."
>"Any man who would jump in front of a minivan for twenty grand, a bottle of pain pills and a Mini Thin is fuckin' crazy. Do you hear me? Is fuckin' crazy."
Thanks grandma
Underrated chuckle
Says the hand who betrayed the Mad King.
he wasn't his hand
and the mad king betrayed the realm, that's why he was overthrown
Right. The mad king fired him right?
yeah he was dismissed for being too practical
I need to reread the books again(skip danny chapters ofc).
Wubba Lubbazinga Dubb Duuuubbb
The way Game of Thrones ends was just so bad. S7 and S8 was just shit. So fucking bad. Astronomically bad. Goddamn awful.
You just didn't understand it.
>wow so you mean i'm illegitimate or something, like maybe my uncle is really my father?
I'm not looking for you assessment of what makes a king. I am the king and my word is final. I'll hear no more of this Hebrew nonsense.
hebrew? are they a tribe along the rhoyne or something?
>"I agree"
Then follow his advice.
>I AM A KING
>holds up official document
>Ser Ilyn, bring me his head
Tbh i think joffreys actual response in the show was pretty good. Tywin was a little bitch
Joffery was actually a decent ruler
Contrarian tryhardism won't make people like you champ
>waiting and picking the winning side
sounds like Tywin did the right thing to me.
>"I am the king!"
then get him arrested with the lowest scum but just for one day
I mean do you honestly think anyone in King's
Landing would have arrested Tywin on the fucking Joffrey's orders?
I'd probably just sing an Elvis Presley song and dab on him
Oh yeah? Well your daughter is banging your son.
>My father won the real war. He killed Prince Rhaegar! He took the crown, while you hid under Casterly Rock!
Reminder that Tywin had no real response to this other than "t-the king is t-tired" and giving a hard stare. He got called out like a bitch.
This
>the Wildlings are at camp, showering Jon with gifts and the songs of their people
>Jon smiles, enjoying this valuable cultural experience
>a cry is heard in the distance
>suddenly, the camera pans to the thundering stampede of a thousand men on horses
>we see Stannis driving the men to fight by cracking a flaming whip
>"FORM RANKS, YOU DOGS"
>in the distance, Wildling women and children are burning, the soundtrack a high screaming wail
>"TAKE THE WOMEN FOR OUR THRALLS," Stannis shouts, "FEED THE BABES TO THE FIRES"
>"Yes," cries Davos, "R'hllor hungers!"
>Jon looks on, his face grief-stricken
>"Seven save us," Jon whispers, "he's even making the women and children pay the Iron price!"
>after defeating the Wildlings, Stannis meets Jon on top of the Wall
>"You're the oathbreaking bastard that killed the Halfhand and copulated with a savage Wildling. You're just like your retarded brother and useless father, a traitor and an oathbreaker. Give me one reason why I shouldn't behead you."
>"I'm the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch!" Jon pleas
>"Davos come here," Stannis beckons
>Davos asks "Your grace?"
>Stannis pushes Davos off the Wall.
>"Melisandre, quickly, get my guards. Lord Snow killed my Onion Knight."
>finish watching a Game of Thrones
>decide to go to movie theater
>dress in my furs, boiled leather, and hauberk, befitting my status as a Northman
>fill my pockets with roasted capon, and Frey pie, in case i get hungry
>bring a skin of wine
>my mom drives me to the theater, but I pretend she’s a destrier since Ned Stark’s mom never drove him
>get in line to get my ticket
>speak in a clear and proud Northman voice
>the smallfolk distributing tickets clearly respect me, “Theater 3, ok?”
>”The North remembers!”
>witness what appears to be a Summer Islander accosting a fair maid
>realize she will reward me with her maidenhood for helping
>”Summer Islander, leave that chaste maid be. Are you of Jalabhar Xho’s tribe?”
>he looks at me confused: “Yo wat dis cracka talkin bout?”
>”You look strange without your feather-cloak, Summer Islander. Leave us.”
>try to keep up a brave face, but realize the pie and capon have leaked out of my pockets and are overflowing from my sweatpants
>”Yo dis cracka shit hisself!”
>Other Summer Islanders suddenly surround me
>Begin some sort of dance from their native isles, chanting “Woop there it is!”
>Not sure what IT is, I attempt to escape and summon my bannermen
>my cape gets caught on the door
>slam my head and wake up in an ambulance
>my mom is giving me a frustrated look: “No more watching Game of Thrones, Anon.”
>”It is known, mother.”
mfw
>>fill my pockets with roasted capon, and Frey pie, in case i get hungry
>not even a single rasher of bacon, burned black and fried in suckling pig juices with a side of spit roasted onions and tender pork loin swimming in grease and butter
that's what you buy at the theatre for 10,000 gold dragons (plus tip), you smallfolk
But m'lord, the theatres have a no singles policy. How are you to purchase your rasher of bacon if they will bar the doors at your approach? Mayhaps it is time to consider wedding, m'lord... I hear there are many fine ladies at the Twins, and generous, mayhaps even so much to grant someone such as yourself their maidenhead.
>I hear there are many fine ladies at the Twins, and generous
Words are wind m'lord
i shoot him with a crossbow bolt while he is on the shitter
"You're right, but any man saying they're the king would be lying."
You're right. I shouldn't be the one doing it. I will have you as my herald or the king shall have your head. Now my new herald... who is the king?
I did not say "I am the king" out of anything resembling necessity. I said it solely because I so desired.
Charles Dance played too likeable, reasonable, and charismatic of a Tywin