No. 2 two hour long movies. The Hobbit is a shorter book than any of the LOTR trilogy but it moves at a much faster pace and more happens in it. One movie would feel rushed
>but it moves at a much faster pace and more happens in it
homie are you serious, way more shit happens in Lord of the Rings. Just watch the Book edit, you can find it on torrent.
this is the only correct answer in this thread. Also, remove the extremely cringe dwarf / elf romance plot. Also, expand more on the Necromancer / Sauron plot.
remove love triangle. make it two movies TOPS. The hobbit is an amazing adventure story and it was written for children. The movies do not reflect this at all. PJ tries to keep it in the same style as Lotr(he basically uses the story that Gandalf tells Frodo in the about Bilbo's adventures). This was a mistake. Tolkien obviously redconned his own fricking book to turn Lotr into a sequal, when in fact they should be looked at as seperate books.
Director : John Carpenter
Bard: Kurt Russel
No battle of 3 Armies
Let Peter Jackson back in when he agrees to 90%+ practical effects to be assistant director
I watched the Book edit, it's pretty good, it cuts out all the slop. Still an extremely mediocre movie compared to the LOTR. You can tell the same love for the books wasn't in it.
less about love and more about time. The Hobbit movies were in production hell before they got Jackson back to do it after Del Taco dropped out and were rushed to frick. They just didn't have the same prep they did for the LOTR movies.
Other than editing it down like others have said I would have kept the same musical theme across every movie. The “misty mountains” song is great and it’s never used again in the second and third movies
Only adapt things from the book
Any new dialogue still fits within the framework of the book
Any new scenes service the narrative as established in the book
No new characters there's already enough as it is
Literally all it would take
>remove female elf >give every dwarf characterisation >make thorin an old man >remove all the lotr allusions >remove the servant of the master and give the Dale royal family more screentime
>2 movies >drastically improve dwarves' makeup and costume >no CGI orcs >no added bullshit like Fili/random elf romance >no legolas >improve all action scenes, especially the barrel and battle of the five armies >no dumb unibrow guy >again, don't ADD anything that wasn't in the book
I wouldn't. I'm pretty sure the hate on the Hobbit trilogy is just a meme from its 48FPS theatrical release. Most people who talk shit in 2024 definitely didn't seen these in theaters, and probably haven't watched them at all, just repeating other people's opinions.
to expand on this, Jackson's Frodo is defined by his vulnerability. That's why Elijah Wood was cast, on the strength of his performance in The Ice Storm. Bilbo isn't that, so what's his defining characteristic? If you were making the movie right now you'd maybe think resilience, someone with a heroic aspect under pressure. Or maybe his trickyness, you can cast a fiendish smile and sharp wit. Or you could continue the horror theme and get a great physical actor for Bilbo who can recoil in terror from stuff he encounters. Freeman is like an unhappy medium tepid Bilbo.
and then Armitage is completely wrong for Thorin. His character steadied the ship after a nightmare start with Freeman, but it's not the hobbit at that point. It's the kind of story Token was trying to avoid, a straightforward fantasy where dwarf heroes fight a dragon, plus side characters. Fans of the trilogy often point out the Gollum riddle scene feels like a moment of relief from a tiresome OC narrative, even though most of the events are from the book their structure is fundamentally different.
It's funny that they intentionally make the subtiles say "Token" in everything before they said it was actually "Tolkien". They make sure every subtitle still says Token.
Actually adapting the book without the extra characters and forced LOTR links
Same visual style as the first trilogy without the PS3 overly bright visuals
2 movies max and let Guiellermo del Toro have full reign like they originally planned instead of forcing Jackson to make them at gunpoint. Instead of mimicking the LOTR aesthetic by focusing on huge, epic battle scenes and deep lore make it a lighthearted and whimsical fairy tale adventure with talking animals and shit like in the books
There's a fancut that cuts all 3 movies into a single 3 hour movie and it's pretty good. Cuts out all of the shit like gopro barrells, the love triangle, and most of the white orc. It also does convincing CG/scene rework to edit out things like the son during the black arrow shooting scene.
Honestly: add Eastern lore like Rhun with a side story involving the Blue Wizards and filling in some KEY details about where Sauron has been spending time and what exactly is the overall arc of the Third Age.
Basically the East is the "second Numenor" where Gondor is literally the son of Numenor and the remnant Numenor, the East is like a spiritually less echo of the idea of Numenor so the fall of Numenor repeats there and contextualizes the Third Age in the West.
We needed a prequel trilogy about the fall of Arnor in the first film. The fall of Kazad-dum in the second. Both cause by divisions and selfishness. Then the third film is a surprise defense and therefore establishment of the Shire by the hobbits alone due to unity and sacrifice and Gandalf is there and he learns the spirit of the hobbits will be the answer.
So the second trilogy is about the redemption of the dwarves via Bilbo inspiring them to be unified and give up greed for honor and loyalty, in the process protecting the North from the dark.
Then integrating a similar smaller tale from the East with the confrontation at Dol Guldur.
Finally, the original triology becomes a story of how Aragorn and Rohan redeem mankind due to Frodo's influence etc.
It would work best to have the events in the East directly address why the elves are leaving middle earth since it's a key but softly touched theme in LOTR and the woodland elves have little to say about it since they're doing their own thing.
cut all the attempt to squeeze in silmarillion stuff/lotr prequel and just tell the actual story of bilbo and the dwarves
no added romance subplot. no legolas.
no fricking playstation quicktime event climbing up the waterfall shit seriously you could have put button prompts in that scene and they wouldn't have looked out of place that's how terrible it looked.
They could’ve done three movies. Age Thorin up. Make Filli and Killi take the Aragorn roles. Give every dwarf a personality. You could even have Legolas minus the girl elf. And don’t add all the LOTR setup with the Necromancer. Make it more whimsical.
Cut everything related to Legolas out. Make the designs of the armies more grounded. Reduce the amount of quips and comedy relief. Compress it to one movie.
Get rid of Tauriel, no Mary Sue, no self-insert, if Tolkien didn't create that character they shouldn't be there. To pad the Hobbit they could have had Bilbo and the Dwarves run into Tom Bombadil and Goldberry. right after they leave the Shire and cut through the woods.
I believe this movie is a necessary evil,
perhaps it didnt need to be more than one or two movies but even so it was much more casual which has acted as a gateway to the considerably better Lotr trilogy for a fair few newbie kino goers which causes the ends to outweigh the means imo
This pretty much. It's a lot closer to being great than it gets credit for as it is, it just fumbles a few huge things. The slapstick action is pretty loathsome and unrelenting and the CGI is already unwatchably ropey.
No frick your whimsical fairy tale, frick your LotR hate. These movies had everything going for them except they were brought down by that stupid female elf plot and the near complete lack of practical effects
Check it out. McKellen might play Gandalf again:
https://www.usatoday.com/story/entertainment/movies/2024/06/09/ian-mckellen-gandalf-return-hunt-for-gollum/74037230007/
1 movie
No. 2 two hour long movies. The Hobbit is a shorter book than any of the LOTR trilogy but it moves at a much faster pace and more happens in it. One movie would feel rushed
>but it moves at a much faster pace and more happens in it
homie are you serious, way more shit happens in Lord of the Rings. Just watch the Book edit, you can find it on torrent.
They had rights to 2 books worth of shit. Hobbit + UT
>90 min
>Covers almost the entire story
this is the only correct answer in this thread. Also, remove the extremely cringe dwarf / elf romance plot. Also, expand more on the Necromancer / Sauron plot.
remove love triangle. make it two movies TOPS. The hobbit is an amazing adventure story and it was written for children. The movies do not reflect this at all. PJ tries to keep it in the same style as Lotr(he basically uses the story that Gandalf tells Frodo in the about Bilbo's adventures). This was a mistake. Tolkien obviously redconned his own fricking book to turn Lotr into a sequal, when in fact they should be looked at as seperate books.
Pretty accurate. Hobbit is lighthearted adventure fairytale. Legolas, romance, sauron and super orcs are entirely out of place.
Director : John Carpenter
Bard: Kurt Russel
No battle of 3 Armies
Let Peter Jackson back in when he agrees to 90%+ practical effects to be assistant director
I watched the Book edit, it's pretty good, it cuts out all the slop. Still an extremely mediocre movie compared to the LOTR. You can tell the same love for the books wasn't in it.
less about love and more about time. The Hobbit movies were in production hell before they got Jackson back to do it after Del Taco dropped out and were rushed to frick. They just didn't have the same prep they did for the LOTR movies.
Other than editing it down like others have said I would have kept the same musical theme across every movie. The “misty mountains” song is great and it’s never used again in the second and third movies
Yeah I even like the goblin town song.
Only adapt things from the book
Any new dialogue still fits within the framework of the book
Any new scenes service the narrative as established in the book
No new characters there's already enough as it is
Literally all it would take
>remove female elf
>give every dwarf characterisation
>make thorin an old man
>remove all the lotr allusions
>remove the servant of the master and give the Dale royal family more screentime
>make thorin old
Aw hell no
dollar store Aragorn
More spider and Mirkwood scenes.
Cut out the female elf
Follow the fricking book.
it actually follows the book, it is just that there's so much fricking shit in it that it feels like it doesn't
M4's Hobbit book edit was a pretty good shot at it
m4-studios.github.io/hobbitbookedit
homosexual
You can't fix something made out of greed.
1 movie, Nicolas Cage plays every character.
by turning off the televsion playing them
shoot it on film so it doesn't look like dogshit
>2 movies
>drastically improve dwarves' makeup and costume
>no CGI orcs
>no added bullshit like Fili/random elf romance
>no legolas
>improve all action scenes, especially the barrel and battle of the five armies
>no dumb unibrow guy
>again, don't ADD anything that wasn't in the book
Not make them
I wouldn't. I'm pretty sure the hate on the Hobbit trilogy is just a meme from its 48FPS theatrical release. Most people who talk shit in 2024 definitely didn't seen these in theaters, and probably haven't watched them at all, just repeating other people's opinions.
The casting of M. Freeman as Bilbo was the end. Casting Armitage as Thorin was already an attempt to make up the previous blunder
they're trash
to expand on this, Jackson's Frodo is defined by his vulnerability. That's why Elijah Wood was cast, on the strength of his performance in The Ice Storm. Bilbo isn't that, so what's his defining characteristic? If you were making the movie right now you'd maybe think resilience, someone with a heroic aspect under pressure. Or maybe his trickyness, you can cast a fiendish smile and sharp wit. Or you could continue the horror theme and get a great physical actor for Bilbo who can recoil in terror from stuff he encounters. Freeman is like an unhappy medium tepid Bilbo.
and then Armitage is completely wrong for Thorin. His character steadied the ship after a nightmare start with Freeman, but it's not the hobbit at that point. It's the kind of story Token was trying to avoid, a straightforward fantasy where dwarf heroes fight a dragon, plus side characters. Fans of the trilogy often point out the Gollum riddle scene feels like a moment of relief from a tiresome OC narrative, even though most of the events are from the book their structure is fundamentally different.
>Token
It's funny that they intentionally make the subtiles say "Token" in everything before they said it was actually "Tolkien". They make sure every subtitle still says Token.
Never understood why people like Martin Freeman. He plays the same bland act in every role.
This is Prequels revisionism. The only people who gave a shit about 48 fps are those who saw it upon release. It's basically never brought up now.
As someone who saw them on release, at 48 FPS, it was shit, the films themselves are shit, and so are you.
Actually adapting the book without the extra characters and forced LOTR links
Same visual style as the first trilogy without the PS3 overly bright visuals
2 movies max and let Guiellermo del Toro have full reign like they originally planned instead of forcing Jackson to make them at gunpoint. Instead of mimicking the LOTR aesthetic by focusing on huge, epic battle scenes and deep lore make it a lighthearted and whimsical fairy tale adventure with talking animals and shit like in the books
ban Amazon and disney from the ip
Meanwhile, the superior strategy
no way this is actually from those movies, right?
he needed more screentime
Already good fancuts.
Not canon. But they prove there is kino in amongst the televised Jackson masturbation
True
why though
hackson has a hard-on for gore
what hellraiser movie is this from
It's from the children's film The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies!
How does he wipe after he takes a fat orc shit?
He plants his ass on an orc and rubs it up and down.
the arms, sure why not. but how does it move ?
Kino
When did Half-Life 2's stalkers get so buff?
Keep the songs.
remove 1/3 of each film and make it all one film
Honestly it would be just fine if just most special effects were practical and toned down the really goofy stuff.
It just looked way too fakey overall.
What's the best fancut?
4K77 Hi-Fi
theyre all dogshit
There's a fancut that cuts all 3 movies into a single 3 hour movie and it's pretty good. Cuts out all of the shit like gopro barrells, the love triangle, and most of the white orc. It also does convincing CG/scene rework to edit out things like the son during the black arrow shooting scene.
Just simply don't watch the goyslop moron
Get rid of the obvious filler, like dwarves tumbling around while they flee from random baddies.
Honestly: add Eastern lore like Rhun with a side story involving the Blue Wizards and filling in some KEY details about where Sauron has been spending time and what exactly is the overall arc of the Third Age.
Basically the East is the "second Numenor" where Gondor is literally the son of Numenor and the remnant Numenor, the East is like a spiritually less echo of the idea of Numenor so the fall of Numenor repeats there and contextualizes the Third Age in the West.
We needed a prequel trilogy about the fall of Arnor in the first film. The fall of Kazad-dum in the second. Both cause by divisions and selfishness. Then the third film is a surprise defense and therefore establishment of the Shire by the hobbits alone due to unity and sacrifice and Gandalf is there and he learns the spirit of the hobbits will be the answer.
So the second trilogy is about the redemption of the dwarves via Bilbo inspiring them to be unified and give up greed for honor and loyalty, in the process protecting the North from the dark.
Then integrating a similar smaller tale from the East with the confrontation at Dol Guldur.
Finally, the original triology becomes a story of how Aragorn and Rohan redeem mankind due to Frodo's influence etc.
It would work best to have the events in the East directly address why the elves are leaving middle earth since it's a key but softly touched theme in LOTR and the woodland elves have little to say about it since they're doing their own thing.
either 1 4 hour movie or 2 2hour movies max.
cut all the attempt to squeeze in silmarillion stuff/lotr prequel and just tell the actual story of bilbo and the dwarves
no added romance subplot. no legolas.
no fricking playstation quicktime event climbing up the waterfall shit seriously you could have put button prompts in that scene and they wouldn't have looked out of place that's how terrible it looked.
the tone is not epic at all
making a super orc is gay
They could’ve done three movies. Age Thorin up. Make Filli and Killi take the Aragorn roles. Give every dwarf a personality. You could even have Legolas minus the girl elf. And don’t add all the LOTR setup with the Necromancer. Make it more whimsical.
No nogs, no fanfic, and two faithful parts made using sufficient preproduction time and practical effects.
Build sets, use costumed extras
Throw a bucket of water on anyone who even mentions CGI
more billy connolly as dain
>Two films at most
>Del Toro directs
>Minimal extra Silmarillion stuff inserted
>Less CGI
Cut everything related to Legolas out. Make the designs of the armies more grounded. Reduce the amount of quips and comedy relief. Compress it to one movie.
Get rid of Tauriel, no Mary Sue, no self-insert, if Tolkien didn't create that character they shouldn't be there. To pad the Hobbit they could have had Bilbo and the Dwarves run into Tom Bombadil and Goldberry. right after they leave the Shire and cut through the woods.
Cut Tauriel and Legolas from the films and tone down the ambient bloom.
I believe this movie is a necessary evil,
perhaps it didnt need to be more than one or two movies but even so it was much more casual which has acted as a gateway to the considerably better Lotr trilogy for a fair few newbie kino goers which causes the ends to outweigh the means imo
edit - frick whoever added characters unoriginal to the book, I cant excuse that shit
Only God himself could understand my disappointment
>remove love triangle
>tone down the slapstick action
>increase the focus on Bilbo
>less cgi
There, fantastic trilogy
This pretty much. It's a lot closer to being great than it gets credit for as it is, it just fumbles a few huge things. The slapstick action is pretty loathsome and unrelenting and the CGI is already unwatchably ropey.
No frick your whimsical fairy tale, frick your LotR hate. These movies had everything going for them except they were brought down by that stupid female elf plot and the near complete lack of practical effects
remove humans entirely, no cgi cringe with the orcs. try to make dwarves less cringe.
Remove elf Black folk and random orc Black person. I'm pretty sure every post before this one said the same thing
They've already been fixed by maplefilms and some other fan edits.
Check it out. McKellen might play Gandalf again:
https://www.usatoday.com/story/entertainment/movies/2024/06/09/ian-mckellen-gandalf-return-hunt-for-gollum/74037230007/
Radagast was awful