I KNOW YOU'RE JUST SIXTEEN

I KNOW YOU'RE JUST SIXTEEN

  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    BUT LOOKING ALL OF 21

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    THAT'S BECAUSE

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    THE CHINEEEEEEEEEESE

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    LOOK OLDEEEER

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA

    KARL, YOU'RE A MANIAC

    PLAY A RECORD

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    based

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    WHERE THE FUCK IS MY FUCKING 50p KARL!!!!!!!

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    PLAY IT AGAIN

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >Sort of uh, half-man. Half woman. Man-woman.
    >No, no. She is a man. HE is a man-- well...
    >His name is Miriam.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      She killed herself.
      >Miriam Rivera, reality TV's first trans star, found dead at 38

      https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-49293351

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    oOOOOOOOOOOOH RIBBET RIBBET

    FROGGY SAYS BUY IT

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    RIGHT, WE'RE NEVER DOING ROCKBUSTERS AGAIN KARL, PLAY A RECORD

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    You're an idiot play a record

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    It's the most convoluted, ridiculous, RACIST piece of material ever to be uttered on radio!

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Play it again!

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >forgetting the down syndrome lad

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You’re muscly

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I wish selective memory wipes existed so I could just dive back into the XFM shows blind every other year

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Have you tried alcoholism? It's sort of a memory wipe.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Not a bad shout, if it happens that'll at least be a silver lining

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Karl: well it seems like these blacks just commit more crime innit
    Rick: oh my gosh I can't believe you said that hahahahaha
    Karl: No but they do
    Ricky: hahahahaha karl you are so wrong and stupid because... well because you are

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Leave it out mate

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      unfunny

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    For me it’s when he gets pissed off about made up scenarios they act up

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The bicycle helmet one immediately springs to mind kek, that and KP Plumbing

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        And bullshit man

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >you smell
      >you shit?!

  18. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    It's the mammal that's got...sort of... the pointiest eyes. Eyes that pop out of their head...

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      ...steve

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous
  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >That's the most convoluted, ridiculous, RACIST piece of material ever to be uttered on radio
    >Play it again

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Thread theme

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >not feeder "come back around"
      You had one job anon.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Dope Nose was Karl's greatest moment of triumph, seems most appropriate.
        Come Back Around is just an /xfmcore/ track, with the likes of Suede - Animal Nitrate and The Darkness - Growing On Me

  21. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Dear mr K Dilkington, you are one of our most valuable customers

    I put it in the bin

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I can vividly recall how hard I wheezed and choked when I first heard this

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    For like the last 3 to 4 years I can't sleep without an xfm episode playing on my phone under the pillow, listened to every single one multiple times now and still do it every night and I still laugh. Just about to start another one now.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I've always meant to ask: how? In a show with wild ear-piercing shrieks and yells, how do you manage to drift off?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Volume is pretty low and I like Ricky's laugh, doesn't annoy me at all I find it infectious. Plus all 3 of their voices are pretty nice and easy to nod off to.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        For like the last 3 to 4 years I can't sleep without an xfm episode playing on my phone under the pillow, listened to every single one multiple times now and still do it every night and I still laugh. Just about to start another one now.

        My dole days are fondly remembered as dozing off at 6-7am listening to the xfm shows. Yep, Ricky did wake me up a good few times with his laugh.

        I once got stuck in sleep paralysis and could hear the show and could hear tricky doing that retard voice mocking 'By on ferry' and even though I couldn't move I was laughing my balls off in my corporeal prison because of how retarded he sounds saying it.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        I've done it too. I think as you start to fall asleep your brain does something to make you less susceptible to loud noises and you just start subconsciously drown everything out.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I only listened to the XFM shows once but now I got in the mood to relisten to them

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      This was me for 9 years. I must have heard each episode dozens and dozens of times. Why does this happen to so many people??

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >Why does this happen to so many people?
        mad innit

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          NO! It's not true! You fucking mental case.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Those XFM shows got me through high school, this post was so nostalgic to read I might just listen to them all again.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Same. Nothing like getting woken up at 2am because Ricky started laughing like a maniac

  23. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    monkey news was the best segment
    Karl would have warned us about monkeypox

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >monkey news
      >not Fifteen Taiwan

  24. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    If moths had eyes,

    Would they be happier?

    How do they know they’re not dead?

    Cavemen hunting for food,

    But not before they style the hair on their head.

    What would last longer in dinosaur times?

    A blind man didn’t stand a chance,

    Not with all those rocks about.

    I’d rather be a blind moth.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >If moths had eyes
      The way Ricky starts laughing when Steve reads that line cracks me up

  25. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Which episode was it when Steve talked about how he would make a good nazi?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      pretty sure it's from the podcasts

  26. 1 year ago
    Toki

    Pierre woodman?

  27. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >where’s your mum
    >she left dad kept not wearing a helmet so she left him
    >I’ll put you in a home
    >my daddy is dead “whining”
    >Jesus

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >and then next year he'll be back again
      >nnyehh can i have another sandwich wahh
      >NO. YOU'RE NOT HAVIN ANOTHER SANDWICH.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >can I have another sandwich?
        >where’s your brother?
        >he died!

  28. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    ALL YOU SAID IS FAT BABY ON TELLY! HOW IS THAT TEACHING ME ANYTHING?!

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      FAT BABY FAT BABY ON TELLY

  29. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    If it's about the Chinese Philip Bailey will be involved

  30. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    he hit a lamp post
    he had a helmet on
    but his head come off

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You made me laugh at a man's head coming off "he 'ad 'elmet on, but 'is 'ead come off"

  31. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    MAN MOTHS?

  32. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    LISTRN KARL
    its not a taxi drive that decided at 40 hea going to wear heels
    its the real thing
    they get hormones
    they get electrolysis trratment for the face
    they go through surgery and get a vagina or a penis
    its the real thing

  33. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >it's a Claire flirts with Steve without him noticing episode

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Is.. is this what sturgess looked like?? I always thought she was fat for some reason.
      Also I believe Steve was a virgin during the xfm days.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >have you ever splashed out on a lady, steve?
        >I hope to one day... with the right lady
        He was.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Its clear that he gets genuinely mad and hurt when Karl hints at his virginity

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            nah I think he just got sick of his "looks" being brought up as a joke all the time after so many times
            he had not problem laughing at himself for most of the show
            karl just took it too far

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              he gets hurt by the jokes about being ugly, just like Ricky gets hurt by being called fat and talentless

              ok now steady on, no need to get personal

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              >karl just took it too far
              They had no issue making fun of Karl's looks, so what's the issue?

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                It was mostly Ricky that started the making fun of Karl's looks thing. I remember at one point early on Ricky was making fun of Karl for being bald and Steve defended him "Don't have a go at Karl's hair, that's a bit harsh."

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              >karl just took it too far
              They had no issue making fun of Karl's looks, so what's the issue?

              This, Steve was a fucking pussy who could dish out but not take it

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                I always took it as Steve acting insulted as part of the comedy, it seems very much to be his humour. The one who can’t take a joke is Ricky, and to an extent Karl cause he lashes out

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      who wouldn't?
      >we haven't probed you enough
      >you haven't probed me enough steve no

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >do you worry that when you're old you will be on your own?

        I can see where he was coming from

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      smack head

  34. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    that me name

    was Bret.

  35. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Invalid...

  36. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Pilkyboys has gone...

  37. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >He picked 'im up and put 'im in a bin

  38. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I thought Asian women aged the best?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      when British people say Asian they mean Muslim

  39. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    every boy's dream

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The drummer from Iron Maiden?

  40. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >Jellyfish... Do we need em?

  41. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >a fella with two heads got run over
    > Why didnt he look both ways

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