he isn't really a monk if he killed people, had sex, and did large amount of drugs
he was just burned out on existentialist navel gazing and hunting down pedophiles
>Don't get attached to anything you can't walk away from in under thirty seconds >You can get attached only to things you can walk away from in thirty seconds
But that sounds like you're not really attached to those things.
frick, why you doing this to me? just went and grabbed one myself, oh well another night were i get shitfaced wakeup in the morning with a headache, eye pain, pop 2 painkillers and go to work
Nah i feel fine, i got friends and family nearby, not depressed at all, it's just routine for me, not saying i might not feel depressed in the future, who knows
>not saying i might not feel depressed in the future
If you keep it up you’ll feel depressed when you get diseases that either permanently cripple you or flat out kill you.
What’s wrong with sobriety that you have to be drunk all the time?
mental alcohol dependence, yeah just quit goin to the liquor store
real physical dependence on it though can kill you goin cold turkey from it, your body comes to physically depend on it and it's one of the worst things to try to get off of after developing a biological dependence on it
My guts are fricked up now so I feel like I'm going to puke 24/7, but if you're not there yet, order some liquid IV on Amazon and drink one before bed and one in the am.
Switch to beers. The other way is 'Hair of the dog', where you have a drink the day after. But that's a very slippery slope. Or drink lots of water and eat something before going to bed.
Lmfao this is the worst advice ever. Don't listen to this kid. There is no real way to prevent a hangover but here are some tips: Drink one or two megapint glasses of water before going to bed, eat a little snack of you think you can hold it and are hungry. It is wise when drinking to not mix too many different drinks with each other (you're most likely in for a headache if you drink beer, wine, vodka, tequila, whiskey and rum in the same evening; even mixing different beers can have a shitty outcome). Bloody Mary's are your friend.
2 years ago
Anonymous
>There is no real way to prevent a hangover
Sure there is, don't drink in the first place
Same, ever since I turned 30 the hangovers have made the next day impossible, with the added benefit of depression and anxiety for "feeling bad about feeling bad". So no, I have no tips because nothing (that I've found) helps except time, and then exercise and getting back on track. I did order some natural anxiety pills from Amazon that help with the mental aspect a bit.
there aren't any. a liter of coconut water and 2 pills of L-theanine before passing out greatly assuage any body aches, but you still have the ickiness of the hangover.
>tfw I turned 30 last August and can’t tolerate hangovers anymore at all
Now I just avoid alcohol to the best of my ability, which is to say when I am properly medicated.
set an alarm an hour before you get up, take your painkillers, chug like 500ml water then go back to sleep. should be fine when you have to get up an hour later
Is total apathy the same as depression? He wasn't a mopey c**t. He had a good job that he took pride in and clearly enjoyed being good at. He had developed opinions on many topics and was clearly a well actualised person.
I don't think he was depressed as much as he just didn't give a frick about things most people 'care' about. Obviously the loss of his child took the wind out of his sails but he wasn't a wreck all of the time.
He was more of an ascetic until knocked off the wagon by his and marty's relationship and the case.
it really isn't as easy as you think it is
i know it sounds weird telling this to someone who doesn't suffer from alcoholism, but trust me it's not easy
you need people around you to constantly give you reasons not to get hammered
alcoholism destroys your mind EVEN when you're sober, don't mess around with alcohol
>morons who call this misery are only consumerist soibois who cannot imagine a good life not based on materialism and consoomerism >posted from a $1000 piece of media consoomer plastic
He nuked his brain with drugs and buried pretty deep inside himself feelings of tremendous loss and anguish from the loss of his daughter and set up a whole universe of cope in his head to deal with it. He was pretty fricked up.
Nick isnt very open about his relationship status but I'm pretty sure he has a gf. Hes said in an early ep that hes pretty much always in a relationship. Either that or hes actually gay (I would be unsuprised).
Well he did get addicted to kratom a bit back and I wouldn't be surprised if hes on heroin again. I wish the best for him but unfortunately the pod will end this year (or even sooner who knows) so rip once it ends. He'll probably go back to alcohol or something.
checked
i fell for the minimalism meme too because i move around often for work
but 15m2 ? damn that's not much, I don't like renting big places but I need at least- 30-35
I live like that and read declassified FBI files about pedophile rings on my free time while drinking.
https://vault.fbi.gov/the-finders/the-finders-part-01-of-04/at_download/file
I've gotten blackout every day since my gf left two years ago, I haven't had sheets on my bed in a year and it's covered in cig burns and stains. My house is just piles of bottles and cigarette packs. It took me a month to clean up the maggot infested fast food bags in the corner. It's so insane that your body doesn't just shut down but then some people just randomly die from like, tripping off a curb.
I live like this out fear of being robbed or having my things destroyed in disaster. Just books and cheap metal and plastic furniture. I have those plastic white lawn chairs in my kitchen with small blue square table.
>No piles of dirty laundry >Kitchen is immaculate with zero dirty dishes >Loves Jesus >Has enough money to afford a two-story house >Is a drunk but never makes a scene like Marty does
How is Rust a loser again?
Sounds comfy. I lived at a place once and I had a little garden. The plants were shitty and dead but I watered them once a day diligently and they actually looked a lot better after a while and it was nice. I hope you experience something like that. Plants are actually living things, even if they don't communicate and stuff like animals.
I haven't had electricity for over a month. apt reeks but I just spray front door with febreze. we had a heat wave so I took my two rescue cats to my moms and when I brought them back they wint stop fighting.
I run an extension cord out my door and plug into the wall outlet so I have ac at night and can charge my phone & tablet.
Bros I fricking love The Sopranos and The Wire. But True Detective season 1 is the highest form of kino in television imo. Shame the other seasons can't hold a candle
I live like this because I have a severe mental illness. My minimalism is a reflection of simultaneous apathy and minimizing the shit I leave behind if I were to make a quit exit.
>30 years old >drink at least a 6 pack a day >usually around 12 beers >feel like shit every time I wake up >hate working, looking forward to my buzz when I drink in the evening >will probably get fired soon >no friends >no gf >avoid my family because I think they can smell my alcoholism >dick can't get hard anymore >spend time watching kinos and shitposting on Cinemaphile >not an heroing because my mom would be sad
at least Rust also drinks
The thing that keeps me from killing myself is that I know you usually actually live for awhile and I have this really vivid mental image of my tongue pushing up against this shredded hole in the roof of my mouth while the blood and brain fluid pours into my mouth, throat, and sinuses. I figure your teeth are probably knocked loose, an eye socket might be shattered, and the entire time your brain is just firing constant streams of electricity trying to understand how fricked up it is. My gun is a small caliber so I would probably live several minutes or several hours even if I wasn't discovered.
I really wish there were euthanasia clinics. Exit bags aren't really an option, either. Helium is all mixed with cow now to prevent them.
>the reason im not killing myself is because my gun is small and not because im a total coward.
Just find a place thats high enough and jump off head first.
I had a fricked up dream like that once
I put a rifle in my mouth and pulled the trigger but all that happened was my head jumped up a little, i instantly went blind and i could taste blood
So i kept pulling the trigger like 10 more times until it went dry and i could vividly feel the roof on my mouth collapsing, blood flooding my nasal cavity and flowing down my throat and the flash from the barrel burning the shit out of my mouth
When it went dry i still could think straight and i didnt feel any pain but i was blind and i got scared that if i survived they would keep me alive as a fricked up vegetable so i layed back on the bed and prayed for death
Past/concurrent life trauma manifesting in your dream state. Probably so many of your concurrent selves killing themselves at once die to an event you either entirely avoided or overcame, and jumping into your body through quantum immortality that it overwhelmed you. Or a really fricked up dream.
I always think of Johnny Got His Gun clips from that Metallica video and it scares the shit out of me. I have some sort of spiritual concept of there being more than just this, but Hell in a traditional concept seems way less likely than ending up some awful vegetable.
there's no easy way out
we have to face the suffering and try to have a meaningful life
meaning has this miraculous ability to make every kind of suffering manageable
Same, except I smoke weed all day. I haven't done laundry in like 3 months. I've eaten so much fast food. Not even sure if I make my own decisions anymore or if I'm just a machine that winds itself up and does the same thing over and over. Kino is all their is. Morbhead4life
>Not even sure if I make my own decisions anymore or if I'm just a machine that winds itself up and does the same thing over and over.
The weed didn't do that to you, it just made you aware you were always like that.
I'm no doctor but I'm sure it's the alcohol that's stopping you from getting an erection. You ever taken pain pills? Drinking alcohol is the same thing because it numbs you so if anything is affecting your libido then it's that.
Obviously there's the immediate effect of whiskey dick and lowered blood flow, but consistent alcohol use increases estrogen too. I'd imagine a lot of it is depression in general, my shit rarely works these days either. I can tell when a woman is hot and the instinct to flirt is still there but I've had a couple of women come at me (decently attractive but BPD types who are clearly into broken dudes) and I eventually had to make it clear I wasn't interested. Can't imagine ever dating or being with anyone ever again.
>Can't imagine ever dating or being with anyone ever again.
Oh, good. You should join the club. The club doesn't actually exist anymore but it once did and I'm a lifelong member of the club. I've never had a girlfriend and I never will so you shouldn't cry to me about your women problems.
>Men who smoked more than 20 cigarettes daily had a 60% higher risk of erectile dysfunction, compared to men who never smoked. 15% of the past and present smokers had experienced erectile dysfunction. Men who currently - and formerly -- smoked were about 30% more likely to suffer from impotence.08 Oct 2021
I don't know about libido but definitely erections.
Lol. Lmao, even. I drink at least a litre at work and a litre when I'm home. I literally can't stop fricking things. Maybe I'm an outlier but I think you're a dirty fricking liar. Fricking candy-ass
I drink around 40 ounces of vodka a day, I'm 30, a chain-smoker, and hate being alive. I was always an alchy but I didn't really have trouble fricking when I was younger and things were different. You're right that being an alcoholic doesn't stop you from having a libido but it and the things it contributed to certainly can. Why would I lie about losing one of the most fundamental things that makes you feel like a human being lmao
Lol. Lmao, even. I drink at least a litre at work and a litre when I'm home. I literally can't stop fricking things. Maybe I'm an outlier but I think you're a dirty fricking liar. Fricking candy-ass
I had a shit job living in the city (london) and every night I would get smashed and every morning I would battle through the hangover and go to work... Rinse, repeat. I saw my future every night as those old sad fricks propping up the bar. Some very intelligent people there man. Some very wasted potential.
I left the city. Moved back home. Cleaned up. I work out three times a week. Hold down a good job. Buff as frick, great health. I drink a crate every weekend to kill the boredom but the alternative was worse.
I don't think I'll ever find love or have a family but I can square that away.
I hope for a great war that I can fight and die in.
It doesn't even make sense to pray for death because you're dying anyway. Nobody seems to understand that they're dying really slowly or they wouldn't write garbage like >boohoo i wish i was dead
If that's what you really want then you just have to be patient and wait because you'll get it.
I don't even do anything but sleep or browse Cinemaphile and I still don't cry like you idiots because I understand that death is guaranteed so if you think your life is bad then just learn some patience.
I love houses that are filled with memorabilia and trinkets. But not for me. I can't imagine having to clean such a house. If I was rich, I'd just get a cleaning lady and cram my house full with crap.
>had been drinking daily for well over year >decided enoughs enough >stop drinking sunday >rough monday, but no serious withdrawal >sober tuesday, feel great >get drunk Wednesday and play pool with some friends
yeah, im not gonna stay sober, OK?
ugh, i know, but yeah, i just don't think i'm gonna do it.
boo hoo, but no, i'm not staying sober. I'm gonna keep drinking.
Good luck with that. I'd never tell people to stop drinking because I stopped drinking and took up smoking and one isn't better than the other.
People who tell you to not to do something just haven't been on Cinemaphile long enough because this site gets worse every year and it has since it was made.
Anyone remember the guy who shot a bunch of Black folk in a supermarket recently? He was only on Cinemaphile 2 years before he decided to go out and shoot people. Better to drink than murder.
I don't understand. Are you saying it's better to kill people than do nothing? That's quite ridiculous. Maybe you should go out and kill people for no reason and maybe I'll get killed but I'll never be the one doing it.
I'd rather do absolutely nothing with my life (which is what I'm doing) than hurt people.
That guy accomplished nothing, by the way. He killed some fricking nobodies and now he's in jail and nobody cares. There's still billions of people in the world so the idea that he "did something with his life" is ludicrous.
If you think he was in the right then follow his example. I don't care what anyone does because I spend all day hiding, filtering and refreshing. That's all I do now because I've been here too long and I'm like the old people that live in white countries being overtaken by immigrants. There's just no place for me anymore.
i don't think of it like that. I wasn't planning on staying sober, i just wanted to see how rough it would be to dry out
turns out it wasn't bad at all, apparently i've got the alcoholism under enough control to where only get mild withdrawal - like, not even the shakes
i've been through much, much worse before
You may want to stay sober for at least 3 days to see if you get the shakes. If you do, then it’s officially time to seek medical assistance or risk getting pwned.
i had zero symptoms after day 1
in my experience symptoms start 10-12 hours after my last drink and will continue to get worse until they peak
DTs don't just magically start 72 hours after your last drink, there's a LOT that leads up to it
Bros I need advice. How do I not get the shits from drinking? I can deal with hangovers and whatnot but my butthole is paying for it. I usually drink a sugar free seltzer btw.
as someone who has chronic shits EVERY time i drink, the only thing that works is to not eat. You will still shit but giving your gut healing time without the excess of food will give you some relief, despite the crippling hangover obviously.
I was drunk out of my mind everyday for about 2 years. For all of 2020 I was drunk, especially ramped it up mid April when my mom left my dad. we lived in Massachusetts and she said she was just going to go visit her sister for a week and come back, but she didn't come back lol. I didn't know how to deal with it so I was wasted all the time. It was going okay when I stayed inside, but when I was like "hmm I think I'll go for a walk today" I remember eventually getting to a point where I was on this bike trail/walking trail, screaming at houses and people FRICK YOUUUU at the top of my lungs for God knows what reason. Could barely stand up. I remember passing out drunk in the snow behind my house for about an hour I think in the middle of the night. Could've EASILY frozen to death that time. petered out, moved to Florida, moved into a halfway house, didn't drink for 11 months. My AA sponsor said I have to change the way I use my brain and change the way I think, so I thought frick this and moved in with a coworker and started drinking again. It's going okay. I'm addicted to Kratom at the moment and I lost the obsession with alcohol, I think whiskey is awesome and I'll always love the taste and feel of it inside me but in the same breath it's like I don't care about it anymore. I work full time, take Kratom throughout the day, go home, take a monster kratom dose, go to sleep. Do it again. Thx for reading my blog homies.
has kratom improved in the past couple years? last time i did it was like in 2015 and it was basically a really weak opiate that only lasted for an hour. and you had to keep taking more and more since the tolerance builds up fast.
>a mild opiate effect is a high though?
Not for long unless you chip... and no one can successfully chip long term. No one.
There's 100,000 white people overdosing in America every year for a reason
ok but what is a mild opiate effect without the high then?
2 years ago
Anonymous
It's a mild high, yes. Pleasantness without godlike euphoria, just a gentle puff of contentedness on-demand.
For the first 30 times you do it. Then you feel like you have the flu + clinical depression unless you ingest the opiate... and to feel "high"? You have to keep adding to the dose.
Hence, overdose.
It helps people quit heroin with no withdrawal symptoms, it’s an anti-depressant, pain-killer, gives you energy, and gives you focus. If you use too much or too often, you will get sick. Nausea, mainly.
Not sure what people like so much about it. I tried it for a while but found that the amount you need to consume in order for it to be effective is absolutely insane, and it tastes so fricking bad that it’s not even worth it.
yeah that was the one experience i had with it. i don't know how there's people that are addicted to ti and using it all the time. i mean it's good if it helps you kick an alcohol/H addiction, but don't replace it
i mean i guess a house with a bedroom would be some goal
but i aspire for a trailer. that's my goal, and a kitchenette, i gotta downgrade from my kitchen.
also beer is more expensive than liquor in the long run
I lived like this
Had a great job, just never wanted material things
Got gf, an interior designer
She panicked, called her mom to check if I was a serial killer >"That's how some boys live, sweetie."
Fast forward 4 years and I had spent tens of thousands of dollars on "furnishings" and custom shit
Thank GOD it's over now and I live like detective Rust and look like bartender Rust. e-readers even let me ditch the boxes of shitty paperbacks that I spent a fortune to move across the country.
i keep thinking this is the PREVIOUSLY, ON THE SHIELD scene at every first glance lolz
i thought i was the only one
why did they keep reminding us before every episode, lads?
kek, it's like a reverse shot
SUCK THA DICK
same
You, uhhhhh, ever gulp down a cold Steelie like a thirsty hoodnig, alky-man?
Based. If I ever move out of my parents place, I'm living exactly like this.
Why did he live like that?
He was a monk. Monk's don't need material bullshit.
he isn't really a monk if he killed people, had sex, and did large amount of drugs
he was just burned out on existentialist navel gazing and hunting down pedophiles
>Don't get attached to anything you can't walk away from in under thirty seconds
>Don't get attached to anything you can't walk away from in under thirty seconds
>You can get attached only to things you can walk away from in thirty seconds
But that sounds like you're not really attached to those things.
I didn't write the fricking thing. I'm attached to my gamecube, but if the cops were after me, I could leave it behind in thirty seconds easily.
Why would you? It has a handle for easy transport.
Lol that dude that quoted you. Imagine being on Cinemaphile and not knowing Heat. Is this the underage generation?
>But that sounds like you're not really attached to those things.
Yes, that's the point of the quote
why do you need more?
He had severe depression.
frick, why you doing this to me? just went and grabbed one myself, oh well another night were i get shitfaced wakeup in the morning with a headache, eye pain, pop 2 painkillers and go to work
it's called waster you fricking moron. you'll never have hangovers again
i still get them, i get to drunk i forget to drink and forget everything i was doing after some time
Just in the remote case you're not memeing, get help bro. Talk to someone. You don't have to live like that. You're not alone.
Nah i feel fine, i got friends and family nearby, not depressed at all, it's just routine for me, not saying i might not feel depressed in the future, who knows
>not saying i might not feel depressed in the future
If you keep it up you’ll feel depressed when you get diseases that either permanently cripple you or flat out kill you.
What’s wrong with sobriety that you have to be drunk all the time?
Hey bro, I do the same but with drugs, it's not worth it.
How is alcoholism real just walk away from the liquor store
mental alcohol dependence, yeah just quit goin to the liquor store
real physical dependence on it though can kill you goin cold turkey from it, your body comes to physically depend on it and it's one of the worst things to try to get off of after developing a biological dependence on it
Any tips on reducing the effects of hangovers? I'm 31 and used to be a good drinker but ever since I turnt 30 my hangovers are horrible.
My guts are fricked up now so I feel like I'm going to puke 24/7, but if you're not there yet, order some liquid IV on Amazon and drink one before bed and one in the am.
Switch to beers. The other way is 'Hair of the dog', where you have a drink the day after. But that's a very slippery slope. Or drink lots of water and eat something before going to bed.
Drink red wine and champagne. It's the healthiest alcohol you can have.
Red wine is even worse. I literally fall asleep after 2 bottles and the next day I can't be functional
Thanks, guys. I think it's over for me. Whatever I drink, I just feel like shit.
Lmfao this is the worst advice ever. Don't listen to this kid. There is no real way to prevent a hangover but here are some tips: Drink one or two megapint glasses of water before going to bed, eat a little snack of you think you can hold it and are hungry. It is wise when drinking to not mix too many different drinks with each other (you're most likely in for a headache if you drink beer, wine, vodka, tequila, whiskey and rum in the same evening; even mixing different beers can have a shitty outcome). Bloody Mary's are your friend.
>There is no real way to prevent a hangover
Sure there is, don't drink in the first place
He's clearly being sarcastic.
No, I'm not.
Same, ever since I turned 30 the hangovers have made the next day impossible, with the added benefit of depression and anxiety for "feeling bad about feeling bad". So no, I have no tips because nothing (that I've found) helps except time, and then exercise and getting back on track. I did order some natural anxiety pills from Amazon that help with the mental aspect a bit.
a banana and 1 litre of water before falling asleep will cure most hangovers , if you are an alcoholic you don´t get them in the first place like me.
there aren't any. a liter of coconut water and 2 pills of L-theanine before passing out greatly assuage any body aches, but you still have the ickiness of the hangover.
>tfw I turned 30 last August and can’t tolerate hangovers anymore at all
Now I just avoid alcohol to the best of my ability, which is to say when I am properly medicated.
set an alarm an hour before you get up, take your painkillers, chug like 500ml water then go back to sleep. should be fine when you have to get up an hour later
maybe just have 2-3 beers to get comfortably tipsy you fricking alky
KEK you fricking loser
Is total apathy the same as depression? He wasn't a mopey c**t. He had a good job that he took pride in and clearly enjoyed being good at. He had developed opinions on many topics and was clearly a well actualised person.
I don't think he was depressed as much as he just didn't give a frick about things most people 'care' about. Obviously the loss of his child took the wind out of his sails but he wasn't a wreck all of the time.
He was more of an ascetic until knocked off the wagon by his and marty's relationship and the case.
Yes I concur, very astute.
literally
the morons who call this misery are only consumerist soibois who cannot imagine a good life not based on materialism and consoomerism
it really isn't as easy as you think it is
i know it sounds weird telling this to someone who doesn't suffer from alcoholism, but trust me it's not easy
you need people around you to constantly give you reasons not to get hammered
alcoholism destroys your mind EVEN when you're sober, don't mess around with alcohol
>morons who call this misery are only consumerist soibois who cannot imagine a good life not based on materialism and consoomerism
>posted from a $1000 piece of media consoomer plastic
>you vill own nothing and you vill be happy
He nuked his brain with drugs and buried pretty deep inside himself feelings of tremendous loss and anguish from the loss of his daughter and set up a whole universe of cope in his head to deal with it. He was pretty fricked up.
How does he get out of the can fortress?
He drinks his way out in the audiobook.
Living like this is my dream but my mom won't let me.
was this an improvement or not
I live like this
it's over
he's just like me and my good friend Nick Mullen
Nick isnt very open about his relationship status but I'm pretty sure he has a gf. Hes said in an early ep that hes pretty much always in a relationship. Either that or hes actually gay (I would be unsuprised).
I don't think he's had a serious relationship since Abby Rosenquist.
Well he did get addicted to kratom a bit back and I wouldn't be surprised if hes on heroin again. I wish the best for him but unfortunately the pod will end this year (or even sooner who knows) so rip once it ends. He'll probably go back to alcohol or something.
at least i have a mom you bum
stop glamourising misery.
It's not , i'm not even depressed, i get up go to work, come home, play vydia, watch a movie and get drunk
I don't feel miserable
21st century Bukoswki
Bukowski actually got laid though.
His airheaded unfaithful wife actually made him more miserable than when he was alone. The grass isnt always greener on the other side.
Move out of your parents house.
that's a fairly small rant for the average sized person, I'd say?
I wouldn't want to read it, but I easily could if I had to.
He’s a big guy
lmao what "professional life"
dude just lives in his mom's basement and tweets all day in between McDonald's binges.
Most of you trannies live with your mom lmao
DONALD TRUMP
HAS TAKEN MY SIGHT
TAKEN MY SPEECH
He’s so pathetic. A verbose, stupid butthole.
no
where do you think you are ? scrubs.funeral.jpg
but... my sadness has a gravitas to it
you're just coping because you're married with a kid in a fruitless marriage
I'd rather be genuinely miserable than pretend to be happy.
It's the only thing I have so you damn bet I'm going to get the best out of it.
That's cool if you're under 30. After that, move on
>carpet floor
Literally me except my appartment is smaller (15m2). Wish I could post pictures but jannies banned me from posting any.
checked
i fell for the minimalism meme too because i move around often for work
but 15m2 ? damn that's not much, I don't like renting big places but I need at least- 30-35
I live like that and read declassified FBI files about pedophile rings on my free time while drinking.
https://vault.fbi.gov/the-finders/the-finders-part-01-of-04/at_download/file
I've gotten blackout every day since my gf left two years ago, I haven't had sheets on my bed in a year and it's covered in cig burns and stains. My house is just piles of bottles and cigarette packs. It took me a month to clean up the maggot infested fast food bags in the corner. It's so insane that your body doesn't just shut down but then some people just randomly die from like, tripping off a curb.
holy shit senpai you can acknowledge another existence besides whatever that is
Post room
I'm divorcing. I'm back to drinking every day. I don't want to die but if I started choking I'd be glad in the last two seconds before I died.
Clean your place, you will feel better.
I live like this out fear of being robbed or having my things destroyed in disaster. Just books and cheap metal and plastic furniture. I have those plastic white lawn chairs in my kitchen with small blue square table.
>No piles of dirty laundry
>Kitchen is immaculate with zero dirty dishes
>Loves Jesus
>Has enough money to afford a two-story house
>Is a drunk but never makes a scene like Marty does
How is Rust a loser again?
I got some.plants to fill the void
I bet you did *wink wink*
Sounds comfy. I lived at a place once and I had a little garden. The plants were shitty and dead but I watered them once a day diligently and they actually looked a lot better after a while and it was nice. I hope you experience something like that. Plants are actually living things, even if they don't communicate and stuff like animals.
I haven't had electricity for over a month. apt reeks but I just spray front door with febreze. we had a heat wave so I took my two rescue cats to my moms and when I brought them back they wint stop fighting.
I run an extension cord out my door and plug into the wall outlet so I have ac at night and can charge my phone & tablet.
As someone who used to live like this and is now a father and a husband I wish I could go back. Simpler times indeed.
Bros I fricking love The Sopranos and The Wire. But True Detective season 1 is the highest form of kino in television imo. Shame the other seasons can't hold a candle
I live like this because I have a severe mental illness. My minimalism is a reflection of simultaneous apathy and minimizing the shit I leave behind if I were to make a quit exit.
>30 years old
>drink at least a 6 pack a day
>usually around 12 beers
>feel like shit every time I wake up
>hate working, looking forward to my buzz when I drink in the evening
>will probably get fired soon
>no friends
>no gf
>avoid my family because I think they can smell my alcoholism
>dick can't get hard anymore
>spend time watching kinos and shitposting on Cinemaphile
>not an heroing because my mom would be sad
at least Rust also drinks
wtf are you me?
You're not alone.
The thing that keeps me from killing myself is that I know you usually actually live for awhile and I have this really vivid mental image of my tongue pushing up against this shredded hole in the roof of my mouth while the blood and brain fluid pours into my mouth, throat, and sinuses. I figure your teeth are probably knocked loose, an eye socket might be shattered, and the entire time your brain is just firing constant streams of electricity trying to understand how fricked up it is. My gun is a small caliber so I would probably live several minutes or several hours even if I wasn't discovered.
I really wish there were euthanasia clinics. Exit bags aren't really an option, either. Helium is all mixed with cow now to prevent them.
not if you use a 10 gauge shotgun and hit the right spot
There are in Switzerland. Soon in the Netherlands too
>the reason im not killing myself is because my gun is small and not because im a total coward.
Just find a place thats high enough and jump off head first.
I had a fricked up dream like that once
I put a rifle in my mouth and pulled the trigger but all that happened was my head jumped up a little, i instantly went blind and i could taste blood
So i kept pulling the trigger like 10 more times until it went dry and i could vividly feel the roof on my mouth collapsing, blood flooding my nasal cavity and flowing down my throat and the flash from the barrel burning the shit out of my mouth
When it went dry i still could think straight and i didnt feel any pain but i was blind and i got scared that if i survived they would keep me alive as a fricked up vegetable so i layed back on the bed and prayed for death
Past/concurrent life trauma manifesting in your dream state. Probably so many of your concurrent selves killing themselves at once die to an event you either entirely avoided or overcame, and jumping into your body through quantum immortality that it overwhelmed you. Or a really fricked up dream.
I always think of Johnny Got His Gun clips from that Metallica video and it scares the shit out of me. I have some sort of spiritual concept of there being more than just this, but Hell in a traditional concept seems way less likely than ending up some awful vegetable.
there's no easy way out
we have to face the suffering and try to have a meaningful life
meaning has this miraculous ability to make every kind of suffering manageable
There's no meaning anymore with her gone. I messed up.
Same, except I smoke weed all day. I haven't done laundry in like 3 months. I've eaten so much fast food. Not even sure if I make my own decisions anymore or if I'm just a machine that winds itself up and does the same thing over and over. Kino is all their is. Morbhead4life
>Not even sure if I make my own decisions anymore or if I'm just a machine that winds itself up and does the same thing over and over.
The weed didn't do that to you, it just made you aware you were always like that.
>dick can't get hard anymore
can this be fixed if you just stop drinking?
asking for an alcoholic friend hehe...
>can this be fixed if you just stop drinking?
I'm no doctor but I'm sure it's the alcohol that's stopping you from getting an erection. You ever taken pain pills? Drinking alcohol is the same thing because it numbs you so if anything is affecting your libido then it's that.
Not how that works. Opioids lower testosterone in men over time. Alcohol just gives you brain damage.
Obviously there's the immediate effect of whiskey dick and lowered blood flow, but consistent alcohol use increases estrogen too. I'd imagine a lot of it is depression in general, my shit rarely works these days either. I can tell when a woman is hot and the instinct to flirt is still there but I've had a couple of women come at me (decently attractive but BPD types who are clearly into broken dudes) and I eventually had to make it clear I wasn't interested. Can't imagine ever dating or being with anyone ever again.
>Can't imagine ever dating or being with anyone ever again.
Oh, good. You should join the club. The club doesn't actually exist anymore but it once did and I'm a lifelong member of the club. I've never had a girlfriend and I never will so you shouldn't cry to me about your women problems.
Does smoking affect libido? I'm a smoker and it would actually be a positive if I never had to jerk off again.
>Men who smoked more than 20 cigarettes daily had a 60% higher risk of erectile dysfunction, compared to men who never smoked. 15% of the past and present smokers had experienced erectile dysfunction. Men who currently - and formerly -- smoked were about 30% more likely to suffer from impotence.08 Oct 2021
I don't know about libido but definitely erections.
I drink around 40 ounces of vodka a day, I'm 30, a chain-smoker, and hate being alive. I was always an alchy but I didn't really have trouble fricking when I was younger and things were different. You're right that being an alcoholic doesn't stop you from having a libido but it and the things it contributed to certainly can. Why would I lie about losing one of the most fundamental things that makes you feel like a human being lmao
Lol. Lmao, even. I drink at least a litre at work and a litre when I'm home. I literally can't stop fricking things. Maybe I'm an outlier but I think you're a dirty fricking liar. Fricking candy-ass
>candy-ass
Hi oldgay.
Hey roody-poo
Chainsmoking and porn probably don't do it much good either. And just aging in general.
I had a shit job living in the city (london) and every night I would get smashed and every morning I would battle through the hangover and go to work... Rinse, repeat. I saw my future every night as those old sad fricks propping up the bar. Some very intelligent people there man. Some very wasted potential.
I left the city. Moved back home. Cleaned up. I work out three times a week. Hold down a good job. Buff as frick, great health. I drink a crate every weekend to kill the boredom but the alternative was worse.
I don't think I'll ever find love or have a family but I can square that away.
I hope for a great war that I can fight and die in.
>buff
>workout 3 days a week
Yeah ook bud
Free weights, good diet, active work. 3 days a week is absolutely enough to be in good shape. Far better than average.
post body
Only if you post booty
I live like this and I pray for death everyday
all the essentials for a happy life in one room
>I pray for death everyday
It doesn't even make sense to pray for death because you're dying anyway. Nobody seems to understand that they're dying really slowly or they wouldn't write garbage like
>boohoo i wish i was dead
If that's what you really want then you just have to be patient and wait because you'll get it.
I don't even do anything but sleep or browse Cinemaphile and I still don't cry like you idiots because I understand that death is guaranteed so if you think your life is bad then just learn some patience.
PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHIELD
What’s the context for this image
They made you...'suck'?!
I see this image everyday but have no idea what it is about.
I haven't seen the show but I know it's The Shield and a man is being forced to suck another man off at gun point. Now you know.
I see. Thanks.
No problem, dood. If you spend enough time here you'll retain all kinds of worthless information.
Some people say misery, i say minimalism.
Trust me i live with somebody who is a Compulsive accumulator and is awful.
I would throw half the trash i have on my house.
I love houses that are filled with memorabilia and trinkets. But not for me. I can't imagine having to clean such a house. If I was rich, I'd just get a cleaning lady and cram my house full with crap.
I used to live like this until I got married. She's literally autistic. Don't fall for the meme gents. The hand is better.
i watch the bike bar scene a lot
How do I make drinking at home fun again? The past couple months it feels like I just go through the motions and do the same things.
>had been drinking daily for well over year
>decided enoughs enough
>stop drinking sunday
>rough monday, but no serious withdrawal
>sober tuesday, feel great
>get drunk Wednesday and play pool with some friends
yeah, im not gonna stay sober, OK?
ugh, i know, but yeah, i just don't think i'm gonna do it.
boo hoo, but no, i'm not staying sober. I'm gonna keep drinking.
Good luck with that. I'd never tell people to stop drinking because I stopped drinking and took up smoking and one isn't better than the other.
People who tell you to not to do something just haven't been on Cinemaphile long enough because this site gets worse every year and it has since it was made.
Anyone remember the guy who shot a bunch of Black folk in a supermarket recently? He was only on Cinemaphile 2 years before he decided to go out and shoot people. Better to drink than murder.
At least he did something with his life. More than we all could fricking say.
>At least he did something with his life
I don't understand. Are you saying it's better to kill people than do nothing? That's quite ridiculous. Maybe you should go out and kill people for no reason and maybe I'll get killed but I'll never be the one doing it.
I'd rather do absolutely nothing with my life (which is what I'm doing) than hurt people.
That guy accomplished nothing, by the way. He killed some fricking nobodies and now he's in jail and nobody cares. There's still billions of people in the world so the idea that he "did something with his life" is ludicrous.
If you think he was in the right then follow his example. I don't care what anyone does because I spend all day hiding, filtering and refreshing. That's all I do now because I've been here too long and I'm like the old people that live in white countries being overtaken by immigrants. There's just no place for me anymore.
>did something with his life
I know lots of super morons use this site, but holy shit anon lol.
Damn bud, that was a depressing turn. Oh well, you'll have enough someday.
i don't think of it like that. I wasn't planning on staying sober, i just wanted to see how rough it would be to dry out
turns out it wasn't bad at all, apparently i've got the alcoholism under enough control to where only get mild withdrawal - like, not even the shakes
i've been through much, much worse before
>finally decide to go sober and diet after drinking and eating like shit everyday for the past 5 years
>only lasted 1 day
BASED
You may want to stay sober for at least 3 days to see if you get the shakes. If you do, then it’s officially time to seek medical assistance or risk getting pwned.
i had zero symptoms after day 1
in my experience symptoms start 10-12 hours after my last drink and will continue to get worse until they peak
DTs don't just magically start 72 hours after your last drink, there's a LOT that leads up to it
Bros I need advice. How do I not get the shits from drinking? I can deal with hangovers and whatnot but my butthole is paying for it. I usually drink a sugar free seltzer btw.
as someone who has chronic shits EVERY time i drink, the only thing that works is to not eat. You will still shit but giving your gut healing time without the excess of food will give you some relief, despite the crippling hangover obviously.
I see. I just let a small one out but took awhile to wipe. Now I'm drinking and letting tomorrow me handle it.
I hate that. No matter how much you wipe it will never be clean. Then the blood mixes in after excess wipage. Not a fun night. But needs must etc.
I hear ya. I've taken to putting lotion or vaseline on my hole after I'm done to minimize the bleeding. Seems to work better than nothing.
Depending on your level of alcoholism this will cause gastritis at best and ulcers at worst.
Under 25 detected.
evening losers
Jesus christ. I knew there were some losers on here but the amount of depressed alcoholics in here is staggering. Bunch of literal degens
I'll take depressed alcoholics over incel agoraphobics who are too scared to buy a beer. Those are the guys that shoot up schools and shit.
The idea that there are people doing what we do but stone sober is scary. Truly insane people.
Blame the muzzie mods on Cinemaphile. We used to be nice and contained.
My apartment looks like this except I have a nicer bed. Sleep is important to me and I’m not sleeping on the floor on some shit mattress
Why did Rust have a crucifix?
Previous resident left it
how is this going unchecked
still a believer deep down even though he didn't go through his near death experience yet
I feel like he wouldn't do it to be funny
I wish I lived like this but my girlfriend is practically a hoarder and buys the dumbest shit for future projects she will never actually do.
never had any problems with an alcohol addiction
on the other hand i have a fapping addiction
any ideas, lads?
>inb4 easypeasy
chemical castration perhaps? real castration? many options
same, but I do it ironically
I was drunk out of my mind everyday for about 2 years. For all of 2020 I was drunk, especially ramped it up mid April when my mom left my dad. we lived in Massachusetts and she said she was just going to go visit her sister for a week and come back, but she didn't come back lol. I didn't know how to deal with it so I was wasted all the time. It was going okay when I stayed inside, but when I was like "hmm I think I'll go for a walk today" I remember eventually getting to a point where I was on this bike trail/walking trail, screaming at houses and people FRICK YOUUUU at the top of my lungs for God knows what reason. Could barely stand up. I remember passing out drunk in the snow behind my house for about an hour I think in the middle of the night. Could've EASILY frozen to death that time. petered out, moved to Florida, moved into a halfway house, didn't drink for 11 months. My AA sponsor said I have to change the way I use my brain and change the way I think, so I thought frick this and moved in with a coworker and started drinking again. It's going okay. I'm addicted to Kratom at the moment and I lost the obsession with alcohol, I think whiskey is awesome and I'll always love the taste and feel of it inside me but in the same breath it's like I don't care about it anymore. I work full time, take Kratom throughout the day, go home, take a monster kratom dose, go to sleep. Do it again. Thx for reading my blog homies.
has kratom improved in the past couple years? last time i did it was like in 2015 and it was basically a really weak opiate that only lasted for an hour. and you had to keep taking more and more since the tolerance builds up fast.
You had some weak kratom from a bad supplier.
What the frick does kratom do?
Pretty much cures hangovers at first. (Red Bali) mild opiate effect without the high, Then it turns your guts to sludge.
Use sparingly
>mild opiate effect without the high
a mild opiate effect is a high though?
>a mild opiate effect is a high though?
Not for long unless you chip... and no one can successfully chip long term. No one.
There's 100,000 white people overdosing in America every year for a reason
ok but what is a mild opiate effect without the high then?
It's a mild high, yes. Pleasantness without godlike euphoria, just a gentle puff of contentedness on-demand.
For the first 30 times you do it. Then you feel like you have the flu + clinical depression unless you ingest the opiate... and to feel "high"? You have to keep adding to the dose.
Hence, overdose.
It helps people quit heroin with no withdrawal symptoms, it’s an anti-depressant, pain-killer, gives you energy, and gives you focus. If you use too much or too often, you will get sick. Nausea, mainly.
Redpill me on kratom
A small dose is like taking a stimulant, a big dose is like taking a painkiller.
Not sure what people like so much about it. I tried it for a while but found that the amount you need to consume in order for it to be effective is absolutely insane, and it tastes so fricking bad that it’s not even worth it.
yeah that was the one experience i had with it. i don't know how there's people that are addicted to ti and using it all the time. i mean it's good if it helps you kick an alcohol/H addiction, but don't replace it
i mean i guess a house with a bedroom would be some goal
but i aspire for a trailer. that's my goal, and a kitchenette, i gotta downgrade from my kitchen.
also beer is more expensive than liquor in the long run
I lived like this
Had a great job, just never wanted material things
Got gf, an interior designer
She panicked, called her mom to check if I was a serial killer
>"That's how some boys live, sweetie."
Fast forward 4 years and I had spent tens of thousands of dollars on "furnishings" and custom shit
Thank GOD it's over now and I live like detective Rust and look like bartender Rust. e-readers even let me ditch the boxes of shitty paperbacks that I spent a fortune to move across the country.
For me it's Mcnulty's crib. If i was american, i'd easily live like this.
>if i was american
I'm assuming picrel is an upgrade to your current living quarters hoo hoo aa aa you stupid ape *throws you a peanut*
>I'm assuming picrel is an upgrade to your current living quarters
Yes
I guarantee wherever you live is better than Baltimore right now.
Black person, Baltimore is a fricking paradise. These Baltimore nigs would't last a fricking week here.
Let me guess, you need more?
Same tbh