>"Luke, did I ever tell you about that one time I used an innocent civilian as a human shield? Not that I cared, mind you. He was a good friend"

>"Luke, did I ever tell you about that one time I used an innocent civilian as a human shield? Had I been a second slower at shooting that Stormtrooper, he would've died in my arms. Not that I cared, mind you. He was a good friend"

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >remember Luke, non-humans are a lower life form than the likes of me and you

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    No snitch'n, Freck.

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Wow, the rebels really were terrorists

  4. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    OMG! LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS MOLE!

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Must be at least 95 pound

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I should have let Darth Vader chop your head off a year ago

  5. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why is every alien Disney invents some kind of mole?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Most Disney aliens are oversized Podlings then anything molelike.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      he's a digger
      what you do for a digger alien

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      They're all garloids with faces.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      and they always have tiny eyes

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >tiny far apart eyes
        >wide mouth
        >no nose, just nostrills

  6. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >obi wan kenobi, you served my father during the clone wars
    >help me obi wan kenobi youre my only hope
    >oh also you went on a multi-planetary search trying to save me from kidnappers working under Darth Vader and you told me about your childhood and we pretended you were my father and you also obviously knew my mother and father who you will probably talk about later in the tv series and I wont be phased in the slightest when you die because the movie is about Luke so I have to respect that obviously.
    >help me obi-wan youre my only hope

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >"I haven't gone by the name Obi-Wan since before you were born"
      What did the man still being called Obi-Wan when Luke is 10 mean by this?

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        What he told Luke was true, from a certain point of view.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        He doesn't go by that name, everyone except Darth Vader and the inquisitors calls him Ben

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      They could’ve gotten away with Leia just knowing him as Ben but then the lady in ep3 calls him Obi Wan right infront of leia

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Good girl

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >and I wont be phased in the slightest when you die because the movie is about Luke so I have to respect that obviously.

      In all honesty, Leia is not great with feeling grief and loss, since when Han died she completely ignored Chewie, a decades long partner of Han and loyal family friend, and beelined for Rey instead whom she had know for like a couple days.
      She might actually be moronic.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Well spotted. I thought you'd go with the example that she didn't give a shit her entire planet was destroyed along with her family. Then again I'm guessing there's some Lucas approved comic book somewhere in which Glup Shitto rescued senator organa last second and he died some other time.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          To be fair, there is barely any time for her to grieve for Alderaan considering the rest of the movie is a breakneck action scene of getting rescued from the Death Star to arranging the assault to not being sure if you're about to get blown up by the same laser.

  7. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    What part of the jedi way was using civilians as hostages while wielding a blaster? How uncivilized.

  8. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time I spent with your underaged twin sister and made her roleplay as my daughter? She was a good friend.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >>Luke, did I ever tell you about the time I spent with your underaged twin sister and
      Ben "That boy was our last hope"
      Yoda "no, there is another"
      Ben /surprised
      I hate this retconned phony bullshit after the OT so goddamned much

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Leia was always in the picture but she was unruly and powerful and Jedi considered her a backup plan at best because if she fallen to the dark side she would be unstoppable. Luke was an unlikely hero.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          The amount of mental gymnastics people go through to try to make this shit make any kind of sense is fricking hilarious. Do you guys just ever think to yourself, "maybe Lucas was making it up as he goes along? and the people that run the show now are third-party making it up too?"

  9. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    everything in this looks so cheap and flimsy

  10. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    One good thing about Disney Star Wars is showing how racist the humans are, you thought it was just the Empire, no it's pretty much the entire human species

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >There's 20 million species in Star Wars chud, don't be racist against the black inquisitor
      >Implying blacks are a different species
      What did Disney mean by this

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          No you see in Disney SW every single alien species need to be single one off character in the background.
          No reuse of aliens or any implication that anything other than humans matter

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        kek. This is getting better and better

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Has there ever been a confirmed mixed-race child in Star Wars? Is there a chance blacks and whites are unironically different species that are incapable of crossbreeding?

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Yes

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            This reveal is great because her character is like 6'8 or whatever when fighting then when she takes the helmet off she's shorter then everyone

  11. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >I sense something; a presence I have not felt since... the mining world of Mapuzo nine years ago where I fought Obi-wan in a quarry....

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >a presence I have not felt since... 2 weeks ago in the finale of Obi-Wan Kenobi Season 6 streaming exclusively on Disney+ where Mecha-Jar-Jar fought mine and Palpatine's gay lovechild on board the prototype Death Star whilst Obi-Wan and I had our fourteenth consecutive duel during the time between Star Wars Episode III : Revenge of the Sith and Star Wars Episode IV : A New Hope, streaming now on Disney+....

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        kek

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Fricking lmao

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I wonder how much of this will make it into the show.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Fricking beautiful.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >where Mecha-Jar-Jar
        you just know this will actually be there

  12. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >get shot in the front
    >fall forward
    Okay so is this because lasers are light but not matter or some shit?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      SW "lasers" are actually plasma.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >plasma
        Plasma of what. I hate mutt sci fi ao much. They just use sciency terms that don't mean anything.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I like the idea the guy was always curious about what exactly the lasers did so knowing he was dead from the shots in a few moments anyway he jumped into them

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      are you implying Lee Harvey Oswald didn't do it?

  13. 2 years ago
    Anonymous
  14. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    > Luke, did I ever tell you about that one time I used an innocent civilian as a human shield?
    Disney stands with brave defenders of Mariupol

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Right? If only Obiwan could have been more heroic, like a Russian.

  15. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Darth Vader... is Anakin Skywalker!
    How do you know this?
    >I just do! LMAO

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Obi-Wan acts surprised
      >even though he fricking saw Anakin being named Vader at the end of Ep. III

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        That’s not why he’s surprised

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Why's he surprised

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            That Vader lived through the burns. That’s how I read it and how anyone without autism would too.

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Vader was appearing in public and word of him would have reached Bail Organa who would have told Obi-Wan
              It's just bullshit to have an epic ending to an episode where you get to see him react to Anakin being alive when it makes no fricking sense that 10 years would have gone by without him finding out about Vader

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >Vader was appearing in public
                No he wasn't

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >No he wasn't
                Lol

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                lmao
                >TO THE VADERMOBILE!

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Literally no one would know who he was plus this scene is after Obi-Wan Kenobi dumbass.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Oh shut up moron. They are all set between a few days and a few weeks after the end of episode 3.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >Lord Vader! Why are you by my side in public! Run and hide somewhere, don't you know this is the new Disney idea?

                who cares about the comics lmao

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                i care more about them than making the latest cheap disney crap tv shows from nobody writers and directors make sense

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >cheap disney crap tv shows from nobody writers and directors
                >loves comic books

                lmao

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                i'm lmao'ing at you as well. enjoy your black woman of color saving luke's life

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                So a black man (Lando) saving Luke is fine, but a black woman saving him (which hasn't happened) is bad?
                Why do you get mad at things that only exist in your head?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Because Lando was awesome and not a token diversity hire

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                This.

                People don’t realize blacks have been in movies forever and nobody EVER had as problem with it in the least.
                THEN they started shoe-horning Blacks in EVERYTHING including established stories and historical pieces, in EVERY fricking commercial as part of an interracial couple, and it’s ALL fake and gay contrived bullshit.
                It’s inorganic. It’s propaganda.

                The left ruined everything

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >It’s inorganic. It’s propaganda.
                It's never been organic. It's always been propaganda. People just thought it was harmless back then and ignored it.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >People don’t realize blacks have been in movies forever and nobody EVER had as problem with it in the least.
                >THEN they started shoe-horning Blacks in EVERYTHING
                Watch movies from before the Civil Rights Act and then watch movies after the Civil Rights Act. Black people were rarely in movies and especially not in main acting roles until it became a moral duty to try to incorporate them into the mainstream culture.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                He's not some secret spy assassin, he's emperor enforcer spreading fear. He would appear on public on hundreds of planets across the galaxy while hunting for the remaining seps and jedis for the last 10 years. Realizing what this scary tall homie in life support suit is Vader wouldnt be that hard for Kenobi who would surely see him on holonet while visiting Tatooine spaceport or hearing rumours in cantina

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Oh shut up moron. They are all set between a few days and a few weeks after the end of episode 3.

                >No he wasn't
                Lol

                He isn't making public addresses either. Most people don't know who the director of the CIA is and neither does most people know who the top General in the US is. It's quite believable that Kenobi wouldn't know about Vader since he is on Tatooine and doesn't go out of his way to conversate with people

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Bail Organa is a Senator dealing directly with the Empire who would almost certainly see Vader then tell Obi-Wan about the impending threat to Luke and Leia. Stop defending their moronic writing just so they could have le epic reveal moment of Obi-Wan finding out Anakin is alive.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                You're not wrong, but this kind of shit is all over Star Wars. Do you sperg out seeing Yoda and Chewie hang out because Chewie should have told Han that the Force was real because he was best friends with their Grandmaster?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Han can be written as telling Chewie he's full of shit talking about tiny green guys levitating stuff.

                Bail or Obi-Wan jerking off and not doing their fricking jobs seeing what the Empire is up to so they can better defend Luke and Leia is much more damaging and should have been thought through better.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >Bail Organa is a Senator dealing directly with the Empire
                his planet was so unimportant they didn't mind just blowing it up. the empire is an autocracy. the function of the senate was already so ceremonial they abolish it entirely in the OT.

                there is also no reason why anakin would want to deal with him.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                He still is involved in politics enough to be aware of the 2nd in command of the Empire when he's guarding the last remains of the Jedi Order.

                You homosexuals want Vader to not appear in public and be sitting in a tomb for 10 fricking years not doing anything just to make this moronic show make sense.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >2nd in command of the Empire
                that really isn't vader's deal. he mostly just kills people.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Stupid take

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Alderaan was a major population center of several billion and it was an influential planet within the Senate, it's why Bail Organa is always around in the prequels.

                The Death Star blew it up because it was a supporter of the Rebellion and to show the rest of the Galaxy that no one would be safe from reprisal if they continued to defy the Empire.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >Lord Vader! Why are you by my side in public! Run and hide somewhere, don't you know this is the new Disney idea?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Based Sheev

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Not canon ;^)

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                And in what piece of the new canon is it said that Vader is a secret figure shrouded in anonymity?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Not the guy you're arguing with, just saying we don't know if Bail has met Vader, or Leia for that matter.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Let's be realistic, anon. This hypothesis would be perfectly valid in the first 1...2 years of the Empire. But we're talking about ten fricking years here. Disney itself tells us that a few days after the birth of the empire, Palpatine took care to make it clear who Vader is and where he is in the hierarchical chain.

                On the other hand, I think that things are much more mundane than they seem:
                > Shitty writer wants to copy Ahsoka's surprised reaction in Rebels (which at least made sense there) as a fanservice.
                > No reasoning is made about Vader's role or whether Obi-wan could have known it or not.
                > The series goes out
                > Spectators point out that this makes little sense and really stretches the suspension of disbelief
                > Disney starts damage control and muddies the waters waiting to figure out how to fix the situation.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Fair.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >his planet was so unimportant they didn't mind just blowing it up.
                Yo Black person they blew up Alderaan specifically because it was important and the military arm of the Empire was trying to send a message to the dissident systems/senators like Organa that were starting to gain momentum that this is what happens to you if you don't bend the knee

                The Emperor wasn't able to get rid of the Senate until EP4, so the dissident Senators had been a pain in the ass the entire fricking time between EP3 and EP4.

                [...]
                [...]

                He isn't making public addresses either. Most people don't know who the director of the CIA is and neither does most people know who the top General in the US is. It's quite believable that Kenobi wouldn't know about Vader since he is on Tatooine and doesn't go out of his way to conversate with people

                Darth Vader is the head of the religious arm of the Empire. There is obvious tension between the Military and Religious arms of the Empire in Episode 4, which DIRECTLY results in the destruction of Alderaan.

                People know who Vader is and what he's about. That's also why the Rebellion is pushing it. Vader wanted to interrogate Leia and snuff out the rebellion with precision. It was Tarkin that just wanted to blow shit up.
                Jesus fricking christ.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >religious arm of the Empire
                you wot
                they hunt jedi. what you're looking for is something between "secret police" and "assassins". the inquisitors also aren't important enough that anyone remembers them or cares about them. they get to boss the local grunts around but authority is not importance. neither vader or the rest of them are politically important in any other way than through doing what the emperor tells them to.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Oh I agree with you. Unless Vader was hiding for 10 years it makes no sense. But that’s the route they went with, and that’s why Obi Wan was surprised.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            He found out you were gay

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        obi wan kind of forgot about darth vader

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        He thought he was dead.
        Apparently he never heard of a Darth Vader for ten years which is moronic.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          yeah thinking about this, its kinda dumb
          bel organa would've surely seen Vader since he's a senator. Had he seen him he'd have told obi wan

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            Bail Organa and Obi-Wan have a line of communication, but they aren't friends. Shit, they met all of once, maybe twice in the prequels. A scattered handful of other times in the cartoon.

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Yeah but don't you think that Vader would be contact worthy
              >hey you're protecting Luke, fyi anakin is still alive and is probably a danger to the kids
              I'm sorry but that's a serious confliction there along with the fight between Vader and obi wan

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Does Bail know that Vader is Anakin?

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          He lives as a hermit on a backwater planet outside the Empire’s official jurisdiction. He spends his entire life working, sleeping, feeling sorry for himself, and staring at a little boy through binoculars. It’s not surprising he wouldn’t know Vader was still alive.

          The show causes problems in the lore, but that isn’t one of them.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        obi wan kind of forgot about darth vader

        He thought he was dead.
        Apparently he never heard of a Darth Vader for ten years which is moronic.

        yeah thinking about this, its kinda dumb
        bel organa would've surely seen Vader since he's a senator. Had he seen him he'd have told obi wan

        >Sidious brings about the end of the Republic with propaganda and fearmongering
        >Hear a rumor about Darth Vader being back
        >You literally cut off this Black person's arms and legs and lit his ass on fire before stealing his wife and children
        >lol yeah right homosexual fake news
        >This random b***h knows Vader was Anakin, a fact which up until now you thought nobody but you, Sidious, and Yoda knew
        >oh... well shit
        Not hard or unreasonable. The series is full of bullshit, but you're just poking at things that aren't there to try to look cool on Cinemaphile working hours edition

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >>even though he fricking saw Anakin being named Vader at the end of Ep. III
        when was this? was this in a tv show? I don't remember this in the films/prequels

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          That image there is straight out of Ep.3 when Obi Wan and Yoda make it back to the temple on Coruscant. Obi Wan looks into the holo recordings to confirm his insight that it was Anakin. It's how he learns Anakin was the one who killed the children at the temple.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I'm pretty sure that holo-recording didn't have sound dude.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          I'm pretty sure you're wrong dude

          ?t=115

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            This was before they fought and Anakin tried it. Obi-wan apparently thought he was dead after that

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              That doesn't change Obi-Wan knowing Anakin was named Vader, and the prospect of him never once hearing about the Empire's top enforcer in a decade being colossally moronic

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Luke, did I ever tell you why I hate Black folk? There was a black inquisitor that chased me and your sister, she eventually became the main character and spared your life in the end Luke. She was a good friend.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Villain Mary sue I see

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      please dont tell me shes the one who tells obi wan that vader is anakin...

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        it's real, and it's not spectacular

  16. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >innocent civilian
    Moron

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      He's LITERALLY an innocent civilian that reported a suspicious character to Empire troops. He literally, emphatically did nothing wrong.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        chud

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        He reported the good guys to space Nazis. It's different when we rat out our neighbors to the not Nazi government.

  17. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    There are 20 million species in the galaxy and he chose to be racist

  18. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    It's an ugly looking alien so who cares.
    This is the logic disney use at least.

  19. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Starting to see why they played the race card so early. Only way to distract from how shit the show is. Black person.

  20. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >I don't agree with everything he says, but Sheev is only trying to make the empire great again
    Frick this guy

  21. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >DUDE what if a star faced mole... was an ALIEN!!!!!!!!

  22. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >EU fricks up the continuity and lore
    >"...."
    >Disney fricks up the continuity and lore
    >"NOOOOOO HOW COULD YOU"

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      EU was just licensed fan fiction that was never regarded as being on the same level of canon as the movies. Disney are the ones who decided that everything in nu-canon is on the same level as the original movies.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Books written by literal whos
      Vs
      >Shows and movies made by megalomaniacal globohomosexual corp
      One of these things is far easier to ignore than the other

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >the Mouse thinks "Whataboutism" will make me watch Disney Wars
      Shill harder

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      EU was well known for being considered less valid than the movies. Fans were fine with it. Disney first erased that, then set out to build a grand expanded universe, saying that it hadn't been done for Star Wars, claimed to have people coordinating everything, and instead created soulless corporate trash.

      The worst EU novels - fricking Crystal Star, Children of Twilight - still somehow managed to have more soul and Star Wars character than anything Disney has shit out.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        You forgot
        >and then desperately plundered it and put it on screen in the most embarrassing form possible

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I doubt they were ever as directly contradictory as characters who couldn't possibly have encountered each other at that time getting into fights

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      The Virgin Disney vs the Chad EU

      https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Chad/Legends

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Shut up Mouseshill.
      What I really hate is that Disney trashed the EU and everytime they pick something to cannibalize they just make an infinitely worse version.
      >RoS is Dark Empire, but 100x worse.
      >Star Killer base is Galaxy Gun, but 100x less imaginative.
      >Kylo Ren is just Darth Caedus with Revans attire, but written even worse.
      >Rey is Jaina without the years of writing and backstory.
      >The dyad is just a moronic version of the connection Kreia and the Exile had.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      The EU IS the continuity and the lore, the movies fricked it up.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      [...]

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      EU always existed outside of the movie canon you colossal homosexual

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      there has only been 3 movies of star wars dumb Zoomer

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >there has only been 3 movies of star wars dumb Zoomer
        based, but it was actually 4.5. R1 was entertaining and some parts from the Prequel Trilogy are salvageable

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      but anon EU has the superior Kenobi story
      >no forced cameos
      >interesting conflict
      >no planet jumping
      >actual reflection on failure to prevent Order 66
      >feels like Ben is actively trying to stay in exile and watch over Luke

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        But that doesn't have Obi Wan blasting Storm troopers and fighting Darth Vader

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Disney killed the EU saying they were going to make the same mistakes.

      Then they made the same mistakes. And new ones.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I loved how they canceled TCW then brought it back a few years later so the manchildren would be all "WHOA BASED DISNEY THEYRE BRINGING BACK TCW THANK YOU MOUSE"

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          It's kind of unrealistic to have expected Disney to continue to produce a show that often lost money so they could air it on a competing network

          I'm sure that if the Lucasfilm purchase happened while Disney had the current D+ infrastructure in place, Clone Wars probably would have continued mostly uninterrupted. I'm just glad that we ultimately got a truncated season 6 or 7 instead of the show just remaining buried forever.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        expecting a sprawling franchise to always be in 1:1 alignment on minor details like these is absurd, nor should the writers of the mainline products (the movies and TV shows) be beholden to what some EU writer said years ago

        it's like people who get mad when Bungie (the actual creators of the Halo franchise) made a game that contradicted a tie-in book that was a decade old at that point

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Star Wars fans aren't too bright

  23. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time I found out your father was Darth Vader back when there was still a Jedi Council, but then years later I acted surprised when I found out he was Darth Vader and then fought him on a mining planet despite him saying he hadn't seen me since episode 3 and almost died to him but then a small fire separated us and he realized he couldn't catch me even though he could walk around the small fire, or even through it, it was very small, and I got away easily. He was a good friend.

  24. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I don't get this screenwriting. Why the frick did he destroy that laser barrier when he could just have walked around it. Was he bored or something? And why the frick did he choose to walk again instead of taking that truck they rode in? Did he try to tire that 10yo girl so she wouldn't nag him when it comes to bedtime? Or did he know there was a truck full of Stormtroopers coming up anyway?
    Who the frick writes shit like that? It's painfull to watch and utterly moronic.
    And why the frick was Vader scared of like 10ft of measly flames? He's a fricking Sith Lord for crying out loud, and he can't even walk through that or just leap over it? What kind of badass is he supposed to be? The female one who just doesn't feel like getting shit done because she's on her fricking period and has cramps right now?
    You just want to punch the writers every time they come up with shit like that, like seriously punch them with the intend to hurt them.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >And why the frick was Vader scared of like 10ft of measly flames?

      an anon made an ok point about that, seeing his old master who beat him being so weak and pathetic may have been good enough for him, change his flavor of hatred for a change, low key let him go if he could manage . vader will continue to ruminate on his hatred in general but feels less tormented about obi wan... also it was something like a nice move from him, sort of, ambiguous but could be a baby step towards the force, a move we know he will eventuially do.

      but for the rest, ye its whatever. not that great. but it made for a change to see big structures. big cities n shit.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        All this fanfiction that tries to give Vader a conscience or make him sympathetic completely misses the point of his character.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >I don't get this screenwriting. Why the frick did he destroy that laser barrier when he could just have walked around it
      The writers have no say in how the set is constructed on the scene is blocked. They probably didn't imagine the crew would be so moronic as to leave 5 feet gaps on either side of the laser gate.
      The gate and environment were certainly all CGI with the Volume so they had no clue how dumb it looked while filming.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >tells the stormtrooper its a long story
      >"its a long trip"
      >gets off after obiwans been talking for 20 seconds

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        There's so much shit like this to indicate that people who have no storytelling ability have written this show. Things like this are an inability to hold the narrative in your head. They're writing and don't remember what they wrote five minutes before and so it doesn't matter, only the current thing happening matters not how it came to happen or what it will cause in the future.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Why didn't Obi-Wan immediately leave the moment he saw Vader? Why did he leave Leia to get to safety (the entire reason he's in this situation) with some random he just met? Why was he so hellbent on confronting Vader? Did he think he would be able to fight him even though he could barely use the force anymore? All Obi-Wan did was just run away when he did face him.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Because Vader can sense Obi Wan's presence just like Obi Wan can sense Vader's presence. He separated from them to lead him away. This is directly from the original trilogy where in both New Hope and Jedi Vader can sense Obi Wan and also Luke and both endanger the mission.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          I see, I still feel like Obi-Wan could have booked it the to the port the second he saw Vader and got away. I guess the writers needed a reason them to fight. Nice trips.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            Probably, considering Vader literally can't run.

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Vader and Leia share the ability to outpace adults at a full sprint despite moving very slowly.

  25. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke did i ever tell you about that time I wasted 30 seconds trying to turn off a laser fence when I could have just walked around it? It was a good friend.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Walking around things is a weakness of the Jedi. This is the hint that even then, Vader still had the spark of light in him.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time the best kidnappers in the galaxy tried to run slower were stopped by one lone branch at either their knees or their chest so they couldn't catch a small child

  26. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I was drunk when I watched the latest episode, but why do I feel like they insinuated Ben had sex with Leia's mom?

    That's all in my head, right?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Yes. Ben had sex with Anakin.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I think Leia asked, "You knew my mom?"
      And Obi Wan replied, "I loved her." in a longing way.

      I didn't watch the cartoons, but going by the film canon they hardly interact, let alone on any level of "love".

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Obviously he can't say 'she was a good friend' because they knew you morons would have a field day with it

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Leia suspected Obi-wan was her father because he knew her mother and was hiding his identity from her.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      He had sex with Anakin.

  27. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    What's the point of wearing that armor if a single laser blast can go right through it

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      there was supposed to be armor plating under the plastic, but an officer sold it and pocketed the money.

  28. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I can't wait for scientists to stop pretending they care about ethics so that we can just genetically breed molemen like this for these kinds of scenes instead of costumes. Imagine how much better horror movies would be if we could just make monsters IRL instead of relying on special effects

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      And imagine the prostitution of said mole people.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I need me some mole people prostitute porn.

  29. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >runs behind small hill
    >camera shot of vader
    >runs back out

    wtf was this

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      It's called "30 foot wide fake set surrounded by an LED donut screen, and the director is an absolute idiot"

      >leia loses her grip 10 storeys above the street and falls
      >bounty hunter stops shooting for some reason
      >inquisitor stops jumping from rooftop to rooftop for some reason
      >obi-wan lowers her down safely with the force
      >leia sits up on the street
      >obi-wan runs around the corner, having somehow moved from the rooftop to the street in 1 second

  30. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    This looks cheap as frick. Like Syfy levels of cheap.

  31. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >innocent
    He was a fricking rat, literally and figuratively. Based Obi-Wan.

  32. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >2-part debut
    >didney+ subscribers surge
    Oh I get it, it's so bad they wanna milk these idiots fast

  33. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke did I ever tell you about the time I abandoned my family? And they were good friends.

  34. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why the frick does it look so bad

  35. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Haha wait, is this actually, unironically from the Obi Wan show. The same Obi Wan show that people pay money to watch?
    I don't believe it, this has to be a fan film made in a quarry.

  36. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Everything that's been out outside of the movies is just the Expended Universe with slightly more budgets, it's shit and i don't care about it. Who cares about what's "canon" or not, just don't watch it if you don't like it, you don't have to care about it, it's not like those shows and spin off movies are going to matter if they decide to make a new trilogy. You know they're gonna ignore everything that happens. These shows are they own little universe and have nothing to do with the real movies and nothing that ever happens in a spin off will affect a new trilogy (if they make one).
    The only thing i see crossing over into the real canon (main saga movies) iGs Baby Yoda

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >nothing that ever happens in a spin off will affect a new trilogy (if they make one).
      You sure? I can see another Kenobi who seeks training from Rey coming.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Rey will start her own jedi academy and be successful unlike Luke.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >Rey will start her own jedi academy and be successful unlike Luke.
          They're going to steal Luke's arc from the EU, aren't they?

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            But Kathleen Kennedy said they had no material to go on when making Star Wars content!

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >these shows are they own little universe
      Frick off, Moses

  37. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    This raping of our culture should be making men angry and active. Hell, it worked for BLM, it'll work when Hollywood is on fire.

  38. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Looks like a scene from Power Rangers.

  39. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >innocent
    he was a heckin fascist enabler

  40. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    it’s okay he was a trumper. Also, kids, remember to attack police with a hammer if they come into your house

  41. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >After six days of hacking through the jungle with a vibro-machete, Jettster had received bites from two vipers and countless gnats, but managed to find the ore hub

    Dex > your favourite character, spinoff series when

  42. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

  43. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Low budget shit. Haha

  44. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >you're manchildren
    >as I mock and post childish pictures
    I'll never get it

  45. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >innocent civilian
    >xenos scum

  46. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Frack is my new favorite character

  47. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Men don't deserve the treatment from the Mainstream Media that they're receiving. We need to just turn off the television and unsubscribe from any Hollywood steaming services. Men cannot tolerate this abuse forever, something has to give.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      if you haven’t done that already you’re not a real man and hopeless as shit

  48. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    I am black so why did you reply to me? I like Moses even if she kind of sucks in Kenobi.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      why do you like a balding race baiting ugly chick who was only ever in that anya taylor joy netflix chess show where she also sucked at acting before getting into star wars

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        She is hot

  49. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    He got what he deserved for supporting the empire

  50. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    that alien was voiced by Zach Braff btw

  51. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >"Luke, did I ever tell you about my brother Owen? No? Good. Frick that guy"

  52. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    did you not see the imperial flag on his redneck ass truck or the fact that he was an imperial sympathiser, moron? it’s like if you were israeli and a nazi white trash rocks up in his truck and goes on about how great hitler is on your drive. i would feel literally zero emotions toward someone like that, they could be burning alive and I wouldn’t flinch

  53. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    please stay in your containment thread

    [...]

  54. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    He was probably a pedophile. I'm sure it will all come out in the comics or whatever.

  55. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Leia:...who/what the frick are you? Why is the Empire making droids with capes? What is wrong with your voice?
    Oh wait in reality this 18 year old sheltered princess knows his fricking name and his reputation

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      you know this scene is a literal decade after Kenobi?

      For all we know Vader might have spent the first 10 years after Revenge of the SIth mostly brooding in his temple on Mustafar, only occasionally entering the fray directly to deal with particularly strong Jedi, while in the second decade he might have become more involved with the day-to-day political dealings of the Empire as most of the Jedi were wiped out and the operations of the Inquisition had begun to wind down.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >For all we know Vader might have spent the first 10 years after Revenge of the SIth mostly brooding in his temple on Mustafar
        Lol write whatever fan fic bullshit you want about "muh he was shy for 10 years hiding on Mustafar but then he got more into politics".

        I'm going by the actual movies and how a teenaged girl barely took a second glance at Vader as if she had grown up her whole life being aware of him and not intimidated by his scary appearance at all because she knew he was part of the Empire's political arm and couldn't just kill her.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >Lol write whatever fan fic bullshit you want
          I mean, you're doing the exact same thing, finding reasons to get upset about things because the timeline presented in the NuCanon doesn't exactly line up with your own headcanon. Nothing in Kenobi directly contradicts what was displayed in the OT, and the prequels themselves have a lot more egregious retcons and inconsistencies, but those were fine because you were five when Attack of the Clones came out

          >as if she had grown up her whole life being aware of him
          I mean, even by the current canon Leia has seen Vader as a child...? Why is it so unbelievable to you that Vader was doing different things at different points in his life in a 20 year period?

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            >Why is it so unbelievable to you that Vader was doing different things at different points in his life in a 20 year period?
            Because I know this issue only began because these shitty Disney writers wanted an epic moment of Kenobi finding out Anakin was alive.
            They couldn't just restrain themselves and have Bail casually say to Obi when he comes to meet him "We know Anakin is out there, what he's become" to show that these 2 characters have actually been doing their jobs and keeping tabs on the Empire to better protect Luke and Leia. A scene like that wouldn't be epic bacon and get upvotes on Reddit with a thumbnail of Obi-Wan doing his shocked face so instead they turned Vader, Obi, and Bail into hermits who don't do fricking anything for 10 years just so their shitty TV show has a Reddit moment.

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              >Stories are scripted dramas where the writers intentionally create scenarios for dramatic effect
              Whoah........ i thought Star Wars was a documentary of a real universe this whole time......

              >have Bail casually say to Obi when he comes to meet him "We know Anakin is out there, what he's become" to show that these 2 characters have actually been doing their jobs and keeping tabs on the Empire to better protect Luke and Leia.
              Honestly, I think Bail and Obiwan being in regular communication is more of a discrepancy with prior canon considering that Leia had to go to Obiwan to deliver the plans to him in person

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >Leia gets the plans from Jyn/Kyle/etc.
                >frick the empire is right on our tail
                >Dad help me
                >Can't girl I have to stay and maintain relations with the Empire, this one is all you
                Clearly Bail was not the action hero Leia was at the start of A New Hope, doesn't mean he was radio silent with Kenobi.

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Baste

  56. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why doesnt this lil homie vader just blow up this sand planet with his death ray? Wouldve solved all his problems

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      it's his home planet, pay attention

  57. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >People are unironically more racist toward blacks than alien
    This is some South Park shit

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Most aliens don't have the reputation for being fricking awful that Black folk do

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I don't know about that. Mexicans are pretty obnoxious

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          and Mexicans hate blacks too

  58. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time that Darth Vader was hunting me for 10 years and he finally caught up with me and had me pinned to the ground in a giant barbecue pit only to just let me go instead of force pulling me over the fire or actually walking around the fire to come get me? He was a good friend.

  59. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    This fricking mole deserved it

  60. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Alien
    >used as a human shield

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >words
      >other words

  61. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    This was something that actually didn't bother me. The "innocent" civilian was going to turn them into the Empire.

  62. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    3rd episode was better than the other two. But that's not saying much. The black actresses acting seems to be getting more and more stale. It's like she has no acting training at all. I can't imagine what took place during the casting process. The lightsabre battles and directing is horrible. Especially the musical direction.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >I can't imagine what took place during the casting process.
      "Okay, black girlboss...good. Say how do you feel about participating in an anti-racist advertising campaign where you got called an awful actor with us?

  63. 2 years ago
    Cric casual

    the prequels are kino. Simple 'as

  64. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    just goes to show you can never trust a space rat.

  65. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I love how the blacks, spics. chinks and israelites are ruining Star Wars.

  66. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Based jihadi Obi using Palestibian tactics

  67. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >innocent
    >able bodied man who under no duress is an informant to the empire at the tail end of a war
    the guy was fair game

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      It's not the tail end of a war, they are the legitimate authorities and have been for years. And they treated him well and fairly. The troops are just police keeping things orderly and finding any criminals, which yea, Obi-wan is a criminal in this case.

  68. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >we resist
    Uh huh

  69. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    How many anons ITT grew up with/around racist family members? How did it affect your view of other races in media you consumed as you got older?
    For me, my father collected Nazi and KKK memorabilia and constantly used racial slurs. My grandfather on his side also was very open about hating hispanics and blacks. Most of the friends my parents brought around were skinheads.
    Only thing it did to me was get irritated with stereotypes, the ethnicity of the actor/character never bothered me. Childs is my favorite character in The Thing and Blade was my favorite action movie until I was 12, other than Star Wars of course.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Nobody here is racist

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >t. pic rel

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I grew up in Louisiana in the 80’s and 90’s. My parents weren’t always overtly racist, but they did express concerns when more black families started moving into our neighborhood. That neighborhood is a shithole now, so I guess they weren’t wrong.

      My Dad was from England and said he never minded British black people but American blacks were something else.

      Also I thought Brazil nuts were called “Black person toes” until I was in my late teens.

  70. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >t. yidsney neckbeard shill

  71. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Jesus frick they're just raping his character

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