No, they couldn't just ride the fricking eagles to throw the ring into Mount Doom.

No, they couldn't just ride the fricking eagles to throw the ring into Mount Doom.

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why didn't Magneto just turn the ring into a disc and ride it to Mordor arms folded?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      dunno

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        2 scoops
        2 rings

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I really hate how many "news" article headlines are written in this style
    >No, XXXXXXX

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      He forgot the 'Here's why' bit though

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Betteridge%27s_law_of_headlines

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        heh pretty good. But anytime a headline ends with a question mark, I always pretend it's because they are asking me, because they don't actually know

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      And that's a good thing.

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    They whole idea was that they had to sneak in. How is a huge frick off bird sneaky?

  4. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Only israelites use this critique to demoralize the white race

  5. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why couldn't they just build, like, uhh, an aqueduct? To run the lava the whole way from mr doom to riverdell? Or to the shite? Why wouldn't that work?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Cause there are laws in mordor that require an aqueduct to not be longer than 1,2 km

  6. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    mordor has wyvern monsters flying above it

  7. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    okay, why?

  8. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    it is directly addressed in the novel
    they worried that if they left the ring with the eagles for too long that an eagle would kill the ring bearers then use the rings power to become "a sentinel of the sky" that would blot out the sun

    same reason why they didn't leave the ring with galadriel because it would eventually corrupt her and make her into an evil queen

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Is this actually in the novel? I always headcanon'd this as the primary reason, but I didn't think Tolkien ever actually acknowledged why, avoiding it more as skirting around bad story telling.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        it's discussed at the round table
        around the same time they discuss giving it to tom bombadil, who cannot be corrupted, but who would ultimately loose track of the ring since it's nothing to him

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          give me a quick rundown on bombadil, from what I've heard he sounds based as frick

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            tom bombadil lives in a forest wherein he has the abilities to alter reality on the level as god
            outside of his forest he is powerless
            each year his forest shrinks a little
            tom is introduced to the reader when he saves the hobbits from an old willow tree that is about to eat them
            he then introduces the hobbits to his beautiful wife goldberry
            this comes off as pretty wholesome on first read

            buuuuuut, if you read the silmarillion, it can be deduced that tom is actually melkor, the lotr equivalent of satan, and that goldberry was made by him in that moment by destroying the old willow tree and reshaping it into something more pleasant for his visitors

            tom's actual involvement in the story is so open ended however, that all interpretations are equally valid and he's a top tier character to discuss at 4am with drunk friends as a result

            in short, he could have ended the conflict of the ring by willing it out of existence once it was in his forest, but he is so powerful in his forest that you might as well ask him to swat a fly for you

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              so he just does frick all and stays in his woods all day? are there really anything known about him and his motivations except from le heckin don't care? And why doesn't he care about the ring if he is the lotr version of satan?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                tom can shape reality in his woods so he can have whatever he wants whenever he wants
                he doesn't give a shit about the outside world, but he is friendly to visitors

                if his is melkor, he wouldn't care about the ring because it's made from his own power and he is simply waiting for his woods to shrink to the point to where his power is no longer contained by it. you could look at the woods as being his domain or his prison.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          give me a quick rundown on bombadil, from what I've heard he sounds based as frick

          tom bombadil lives in a forest wherein he has the abilities to alter reality on the level as god
          outside of his forest he is powerless
          each year his forest shrinks a little
          tom is introduced to the reader when he saves the hobbits from an old willow tree that is about to eat them
          he then introduces the hobbits to his beautiful wife goldberry
          this comes off as pretty wholesome on first read

          buuuuuut, if you read the silmarillion, it can be deduced that tom is actually melkor, the lotr equivalent of satan, and that goldberry was made by him in that moment by destroying the old willow tree and reshaping it into something more pleasant for his visitors

          tom's actual involvement in the story is so open ended however, that all interpretations are equally valid and he's a top tier character to discuss at 4am with drunk friends as a result

          in short, he could have ended the conflict of the ring by willing it out of existence once it was in his forest, but he is so powerful in his forest that you might as well ask him to swat a fly for you

          so he just does frick all and stays in his woods all day? are there really anything known about him and his motivations except from le heckin don't care? And why doesn't he care about the ring if he is the lotr version of satan?

          direct paraphrase of what Gandalf and Agent Smith say about Bomba at the council
          >we should have given it to Tom Bombadil, but he was too big of a homosexual

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            kek this can't be true

            tom can shape reality in his woods so he can have whatever he wants whenever he wants
            he doesn't give a shit about the outside world, but he is friendly to visitors

            if his is melkor, he wouldn't care about the ring because it's made from his own power and he is simply waiting for his woods to shrink to the point to where his power is no longer contained by it. you could look at the woods as being his domain or his prison.

            so he ruined the old willow tree, then it imprisoned him and now he is just killing time until it shrinks? (given that he is melkor)

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              >so he ruined the old willow tree
              yes

              >then it imprisoned him
              no

              >and now he is just killing time until it shrinks? (given that he is melkor)
              possibly

              the reasoning cited by the characters is that tom predates the creation myth where the god of lotr, the illuvitar, created the demigods who then in turn created middle earth

              the forest is reasoned to be the oldest, predating that creation, and because it was made by tom instead of the illuvitar, he is all powerful within it

              however, it is hinted in the text that this explanation is "too convenient" and that tom may be someone more sinister than he appears [ie, melkor]

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >the forest is reasoned to be the oldest, predating that creation, and because it was made by tom instead of the illuvitar, he is all powerful within it
                so the forest is in a way separated from the entire rest of the world? sounds gay but a magical place in some way?
                >however, it is hinted in the text that this explanation is "too convenient" and that tom may be someone more sinister than he appears [ie, melkor]
                kino

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >so the forest is in a way separated from the entire rest of the world?
                you walk directly into it from the shire
                >sounds gay but a magical place in some way?
                the forest is just as magical and dangerous as any other, it's just that once you step inside, you are completely in the power of TB. if he wanted to, he could blink you out of existance

                at one point, frodo hands tom the ring. tom slips it on his finger, laughs, then throw is it into the air, where it momentarily disappears, possibly ceasing to exist, before reappearing in his palm.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >you walk directly into it from the shire
                So it's not that you have to "discover" it or it has to "present" itself to you, does literally everyone know about its location?
                >at one point, frodo hands tom the ring. tom slips it on his finger, laughs, then throw is it into the air, where it momentarily disappears, possibly ceasing to exist, before reappearing in his palm.
                I have to say again, kino. Any other kino moments with bombadil?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >So it's not that you have to "discover" it or it has to "present" itself to you, does literally everyone know about its location?
                its just beyond farmer maggots fields, he chases the boy into the forest after they steal some of his crops
                it's a known location that most people avoid due to the danger
                >I have to say again, kino. Any other kino moments with bombadil?
                tom only appears in this early chapter and then never again
                he's supposed to be a mystery that can never be solved, so I suggest if you're interested, read his chapter. it's pretty good, though i see why he's cut from the movies

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                yeah, you can't really have such a character in such a black and white movie as lotr

                I've tried reading lotr before but I just found the style to be tedious, but this sounds too kino to not read, which one it is?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Fellowship I.7, “In the House of Tom Bombadil”

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                thank you bro

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >Any other kino moments
                that one time the Bobbits have to cross an ancient haunted battlefield and get captured by a wraith who's about to sacrifice them in a satanic ritual when Bombadil shows up and btfos him into the shadow realm by musically telling him to frick off from this world.
                I also don't know where that one anon got the impression from that Bombadil is actually Melkor or that shit about his wife being the transformed old man willow. As in the novel it's implied that shes some type of river spirit, he calls her river womans daughter.

  9. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    They couldn't fly to Mordor because Sam was too fat. They could fly out of Mordor because through their cruel ordeal, Sam had lost weight.

  10. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why didn’t the fellowship just hijack a fellbeast?

  11. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    the eagles would have stolen the ring. read a book. the new show looks fricking terrible by the way.

  12. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Because Mordor had great anti-aircraft defence and surface-to-air missiles.

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