>staying up to 1 am just so you can watch the Girls Gone Wild commercials
Take me back
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>staying up to 1 am just so you can watch the Girls Gone Wild commercials
Take me back
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
For me, it was Cinemax
My first fap was to Genie in a string bikini on Cinemax
Holy frick I remember this and wacking to some other ones around that same time frame. Busty Cops is one.
>Busty Cops
FUUUUCK I REMEMBER
In the hours booked at that night at the cinemax, what are the names adult films at that time?
Holy shit. Thanks for the recommendation. Danielle Petty is as close to a porn star version of Jennifer Connelly that will ever exist.
For me, its "sapphire girls"
Literally, actually me. Except my bed faced the other way and I laid on my left side.
Kino image
The real meta was to flip to one channel below or above nickelodeon and hit last>up/down so that if your parents hit "last" it would take them to that channel.
I was never paranoid enough to think my parents might come by, take the remote, and hit last just to make sure I wasn't watching porn.
Nit him but my parents would have done that.
They got a techie to undelete or internet history to make sure I wasn't looking at anything weird and when they found the porn searches they rang other kid's parents and told them to get ahead of the story so they wouldn't be associated with the bad press if it got out
I'm assuming it wasn't Vaporeon getting peed on by Mewtwo porn then.
What are you talking about? What other kids? Why would there be a story and how would it magically get out?
I found Real Sex to be more disappointing than not. For every episode that was about naked neopagan rituals, there were 5 about elderly people using sex toys or whatever.
Yeah, which made it that much better when there was something hot.
Yeah but there was the one with the porn stars fricking the full size male sex doll. Full on quality jack material when you were 12. You know the one what I'm talking about.
For me, it's "Wild On!" with Brooke Burke.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_On!
>Naked Wild On! is an Australian re-edit of Wild On! in the style of Girls Gone Wild. It brings together various scenes of nudity and lesbianism within the show into a series of themed episodes (see below). All episodes are uncensored and narrated for comical effect.
It's not fair bruhs...
Back in the boomer years of the 90s and early 00s german TV would send french soft core porn after 22:00.
>Eis am Stiel all parts at prime time
>french / italian softcore porn after 10pm
Based VOX
Germany still does that.
RTL2, Sat1, Cabel 1 and Vox still play softcore porn after midnight.
Vox particularly sometimes plays hentai for some weird reason. I remember them playing the German dub for Bible black and Viper GTS sometime in 2008 or so.
>Viasat airing Red Shoe Diaries every thursday from 23:00
man I miss being 15
I remember watching an episodd about hentai on this shit. There was a part about fascination eith machines, and showed a hentai with machines fricking a woman in all holes. Not explicitly but its forever burned into my mind.
I never found the source.
For me, it was the Showcase Revue.
I also fapped to Ninja Scroll’s sex scenes numerous times.
>It's a "sit there with your dick half hard for 45 minutes because they showed one hot big booba girl like 10 minutes in and nothing since but you can't abandon the show what if she comes back" episode
>real sex comes on
>it's a 55+ ugly ass old people/"nudists" sit around and talk about sex toys episode
(almost) every time
as a kid this b***h made me fricking bust the fattest nuts whenever she came on screen
>Taylor Wane
Made me beat my dick raw as a middle schooler
For me, it was Misty Mundae
>Misty Mundae
Her best
I’m not ashamed to say I would stay up until like 2 am and watch Comedy Central just so I could jerk off to the GGW commercials
That and fapping to Brooke Burke and that E! show “Wild On”.
now every girl has onlyfans and you can watch all the porn in 4k
frick the boomers and frick their shitty past.
also frick blink 182 and that homosexual whibley
Sometimes less is more, but you zoomers wouldn't ever understand moderation or patience.
I'm happy youll all be dead by 35
society is literally collapsing because of zoomers and to a lesser extent millennials having little to no concept of delayed gratification.
>JOHNNY REWIND IT I THINK I SAW A NIPPLE
TOUCH MY WEE WEE AGAIN ANON THAT FELT GOOD
>used to get my first, amazing nuts to spice as a kid
>now cant really get off without watching hardcore troony gangbangs
Easily accessible porn was a fricking mistake bros.
kek spice, those were the days, random porn mags in the woods too
>random porn mags in the woods too
this fricking meme
when my bro and I were young we were hiking up in the forest park near our house with our dad and we came across a stash of polaroids someone had left off to the side of the trail. it was just some dude's hairy ballsack and butthole tho unfortunately, no doubt left either as a prank or as some homo's fetish.
never understood those. the weirdest thing is that the ones i found were never in ziploc bags and it would rain at least once a week where i grew up and none of the mags were ever water damaged
in hindsight, i'm glad i never fapped in the woods to them. NAMBLA was quite famous back then and i could picture some sickfrick NAMBLAgay with binoculars peeking at my little stiff pickle and getting off
Daisy:
Right, I'm going to the shops. D'you want anything?
Tim:
Porn.
Daisy:
Tim, I'm not going to buy you porn. You can get it from railway sidings like everybody else.
Tim:
I can't, I'm an adult. I'm supposed to leave it there.
when i grew up, i wanted to be one of the heroes that would give free porn to the kids. unfortunately, by that time, the internet had become ubiquitous and there was no need for me to do that.
>NAMBLA was quite famous back then and i could picture some sickfrick NAMBLAgay with binoculars peeking at my little stiff pickle and getting off
never thought of that tbh. but also, i never thought of leaving the porn there. if i found some, i took it so i could fap all the time at home.
My simple Unified Theory of Woods Porn is that tons of guys bought porno mags from newsstands while commuting, then tossed them aside instead of bringing them home to avoid aggravating their wives
but why in the woods and not a random garbage can. people went to the woods to jerk off. jerking off leaves a smell women can pick up on
i've been watching hardcore gangbang porn since I was like 13 back in the mid 90s and I turned out like a typical normie in my public life (married with kids etc) but I never got into trannies and the idea disgusts me still today. i think you might just be gay.
this im tired of this idea that watching too much porn makes you jack off to troony shit. every so often troony/gay shit pops up of whatever pornsite im on and i get soft instantly every time i accidently look at one of those thumbnails. feels good to have confirmation that im not gay.
I legit get off more to lingerie pics from bawds than actual vids now. wtf is going on
>troony porn
I thought this was just a meme. What's the appeal? You have real women in porn and real men fricking them
>he'd rather watch some masculine beefcake pounding away at a pussy instead of a cute girl with a feminine wiener pounding away at a pussy
are you gay or something?
Some times the sound would work.
the women moaning was enough
yes
This. I thank god I still have very vanilla taste in porn. But I also only watch JOI or virtual sex videos.
I pretty much can't get off without watching sfm of vidya/anime girls getting fricked by dogs or horses anymore.
Back in the day I had gotten a special double decker VCR to pirate anime tapes and sell at school. Turns out that when I played a scrambled channel through that VCR, it unscrambled like 60% of it. It was like discovering a superpower.
i remember friends having a cable descrambler. looked like a long, cylindrical suppressor for a gun you screwed into the back of a VCR. shit worked to
I just reported you all the cyber police. You done goofed
Ha! Same thing happened to me. I had two VCRs to rip anything I rented (as obsessively building my kino collection) and I’d let friends at school borrow them. I was fiddling with it one day and turned it to HBO and was like, “Hey… I didn’t know they were having a free weekend. Hey… why aren’t they scrolling that annoying message at the bottom- oh HOLY SHIT!”
This. My cousin had a black box and I got to sneak watch this channel every once in a while when no one was around.
My dad got one for the house but he would hide it in the bedroom at night. The thrill of sneaking in after everyone is asleep and hooking it up was the best. I think spice channel came on at like 11 pm so the anticipation and the jack off sessions were amazing. Fricking kino.
>used to find stripteases extremely sexy
>still find them extremely sexy
I don't understand how people can get tired of it. I just don't get it.
You've lived your entire life drinking water, and yet you still feel thirsty if don't drink.
How is this any different? You are programmed to feel a specific response to a specific stimuli. There's no logical reason why that would change.
Are people just lying about shit like this? Is all of it a bunch of propaganda to attack the porn industry? Am I replying to bait right now?
For me it was a series called Bliss on Oxygen
For me it was Howard Stern on E and Wild on E
>Wild on E
Mah homie
What a gross old hag. Who would honestly call her up and want her to talk about eating ass?
True story. She came to my highschool to talk about masturbation and sexuality (simpler times). She slapped my ass while walking by me into my school's office (I was caught drinking).
Good ol' pervy Sue
>NAOW THIS IS A PAWCKET RAWCKET
I can still hear her voice...
>yfw you first discovered the spanish language soaps that played at 3am
I don't know what those latinos were yelling about but they threw breasts around like it was good luck.
tln?
on a sports show a guy joked
>stats are like tln on a saturday night, they show a lot, but they don't show everything
Good teenage me nostalgia. The oxygen channel also had a romance show around her time slot (Bliss) that was really steamy. There was a lesbian episode that I eventually VCRed for...on demand purposes
lol what the hell, forgot about Bliss, I j/o'd to that numerous times
>Nocturnal Emissions episode of Cinematech featuring DOA and other horny JP games
I had a tape that i recorded the 420 special of x-play on that after that was nothing but cinematech nocturnal emissions clips of porn games, rumble roses, and doa volleyball, the doa clips being how i first heard I want your girlfriend to be my girlfriend to by Reel big fish.
Dude I haven’t thought of this in like 15 years back when they used to have these available to play as individual videos on Comcast.
They should have follow up videos "Girls Gone Unconscious" and "Girls Gone Missing"
For me it was sex chat ads, where they'd have this mindblowingly hot chick model for about 5 minutes.
There was one Asian girl underneath a tree in the water wearing a gold bikini that I remember to this day. It sad that I will never see or be able to find it again.
They would use pornstars for those. I remember seeing julia ann and Alexis texas in one and thought I was day dreaming.
Daisie Marie in those softcores on HBO
What an evolution in my lifetime
>Jerking off to Girls Gone Wild infomercials
>Sneaking downstairs during premium cable free weekends to jerk to real porn
>Printing nude pictures on my parents computer at 1am
>Finally getting my own computer but being too moronic to find good porn (This was like 2004)
>Find a porn tape my parents got for free from Adam and Eve and forgot about in their room
>Parents upgrade to premium channels and get everyone their own DVR so I can DVR porn I didn't know they could see what was on everyone's but they never said anything
>Now I can find whatever niche fricking fetish in 4k
this show is so good, I had to buy the dvd because I couldent find it HD online
wrong photo
This show was frickin' awesome! I think it inspired alot of people.
A bunch of episodes are missing, can't find them anywhere
check myspleen
kino theme
>be 12
>drink a bunch of soda
>stay up late watching Beyond Belief marathon on SciFi Channel
>getting a little dazed and spooked
>episode ends
>information for a metal dome that you make cake fillings with comes on
>beyond belief
God I was so obsessed with this show as a kid. I use to freak myself out at the stories that were real and think it would happen to me
I lost sleep for a month after the "Monster in the Closet" and "Haunted Mirror at the Stairs" episodes. I had one of those sliding door closets with mirrors for doors in my room that I shared with my sisters. I refused to be in that room alone because of Beyond Belief.
i'm on a list now aren't i?
Now? No.
THE GOVERNMENT IS GIVING AWAY FREE MONEY
>used to think this guy was a quack
>see millions of people drop out of the workforce after spring of 2020 and make even more money than when they were working
dude was right all along.
Being a child is coming to ggw
Being an adult is coming to this dudes philosophy
Would watch this as an 8 year old, the grapes in the swimsuit part will always be hot to me https://youtu.be/LCwMxUy-9ug
>finally watch girls gone wild once internet takes off in the US
>it's just some flashes of boobs, drunken girls grinding before passing out, and a creep behind the camera deeply breathing and saying oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah
What a letdown that was
The lesbian ones were decent. They were probably hired porn actresses but the illusion of them being 2 college hussies who decided to frick on cam for a shirt was good enough
I remember staying up late to watch sitcoms where the main character had huge breasts and was always showing cleavage. I would plan my Sunday around watching Xena Warrior Princess, Cleopatra 2525, and Jack of All Trades because they had chicks with huge breasts that I would then fap to later. I have no idea how kids with cell phones and porn 24/7 are going to be able to grow up and learn how to function in society.
Anyone remember the "REJECTED" hotline? It was a fake number girls would give to guys to save themselves the discomfort of rejecting a creep or sleeze while the hotline played an automated message telling the caller "YOU JUST GOT REJECTED." and insulting them.
Gen Xers had been saying the same thing about Millennials during the oughts.
>Gen Xers had been saying the same thing about Millennials during the oughts.
Forgot pic.
>an actually funny PA strip
>2008
ah, that explains it
Peak style, I still like their comic though, Just lost it's edge as we all do when we get older.
It's hard to keep delivering content and stay consistent, relevant, original, and interesting.
I wrote this in a concurrent thread:
I'm a millennial old enough to remember a time before the internet and easy access to internet porn.
>Every boy I knew had our first faps looking at bare breasted native women featured in National Geographic.
>We leveled up to discarded porn mags, porn playing cards, and trinkets some heroes left in the wooded areas of parks or buried in playground sandboxes.
-Rummaged through our dad's belongings hoping to find hidden porn stashes. (My best friend's dad kept it in a bucket buried underneath tools within a cut out garage wall covered by removable boards which was also where his arsenal firearms. (Man managed to score a pre-ban Steyr Aug, Chinese Type 56, and FN FNC.)
>And descrambled premium cable.
>And censored Girls Gone Wild ads late night.
It wasn't until the early aughts that internet porn became reliable enough.
>Took ages on dial up to load thumbnail galleries during the 90's.
>They were filled with pop ups that could load endlessly and autoplay javascripts and crash your computer. And there was nothing to stop it.
>Kazaa and Limewire porn could give you viruses. And they were often bait that wasn't what the title claimed.
>Most of the porn was absolute low quality trash with no real great search and filter options.
>And it was too easy to accidentally stumble on bestiality or CP.
My Black person. I used to print entire porn doujins on our family computer in the living room. I put a sheet of create-a-wrestler formulas for WWF games on top so I could pretend that was all I was printing
>I put a sheet of create-a-wrestler formulas for WWF games on top so I could pretend that was all I was printing
Smart. My friend's idiot brother was the only person I knew who printed porn (mostly hentai and rule 34 art) he found online. He was terrible at hiding it.
>He'd put it inside his clothes drawers.
>And not even fold and bury it underneath clothes or slip it in between the gaps or tape it under the sliding drawers.
>But just leave it LAYING ON TOP.
>He'd also burn DVDs and CDs of porn and instead of labeling it "Math Homework" or "Encarta" would WRITE THE PORNO'S TITLE ON THE DISK! (Like picrel from a laughable antiporn propaganda movie from the Lifetime channel called Cyber Seduction. It's so bad it's good kino.)
>Or underneath his pillow.
>Or under the mattress.
Obv. his mother or more often than not their middle aged Latina maid would find them every time.
And their parents were multimillionaires. The brother would throw rageful tantrums and smash and destroy expensive items that would total up to more than my wagie parents earned in their lifetime.
I hid them in folder/ziplocs under my bed. Thankfully, my mom was a single parent who worked long hours and she didn't have time or energy to clean/snoop. My younger sister did find my Fleshlight though.
>I put a sheet of create-a-wrestler formulas for WWF games on top
based I remember creating wrestlers
Yeah, the would do that or give the time and weather phone number.
None of those shows you mentioned are sitcoms.
I can't remember the names of them. One of them had a puppet in the basement and a girl with huge knockers that were always busting out of her shirt.
Sounds like Unhappily Ever After, the Married with Children ripoff starring Nikki Cox.
Yes!
For me? It was scrambled porn on the Spice channel.
Sit down. Be humble. This is the best millennial nostalgia commercial.
Although I did look for the dick pill commercial where boomers were showing off their 6/10 slag prostitutes that showed at the same time and couldn't find it.
what the frick? i don't think i've ever seen this shit before.
then there was a 5 year period where you weren't watching comedy central past 10PM
That five year period could not have been between like 2003-2008, because I definitely watched late night Comedy Central during those years.
my first fap was playing paparazzi games on addictinggames dot com
Or Jake's booty call
This is Bob
streaming 80s MTV broadcasts all night, comfortable commercials included @ https://bongstream.live/north2/
I want to go back.
I remember when web pages started loading all at once instead of gradually from top to bottom as high speed internet replaced dial up 56k connections it felt like fricking magic
>56k
i remember surfing the net back then looking for porn. would occasionally bump into a CP site and before i could gtfo, i get spam-blasted by a hundred CP or borderline-legal e-girlta sites all at once, knocking me off online. shit was annoying af. i just wanted to see some legal pics of naked chicks for free since before the net I had to buy a fricking magazine to see them naked. i literally thought because i accidentally came upon that shit, that the russian mafia knew my IP address and would be coming after me and my parents lol i was legit scared more of the russian mafia than legal law enforcement
i'm shocked my parents never questioned the 56k noise restarting all night in my bedroom
i remember when they used to advertise porn sites (TGPs or "thumbnail gallery posts" as they were called back then) by using heavily edited photos and thumbnails of legal teens made to look extremely underage, but I don't remember any actual pizza out in the open. Though when I was 13-14 I did stumble across LS and old legal-when-it-was-made magazines from 70s europe that were uh... interesting to young teenage me.
Yep. Funny to think before the internet you'd have to have some creepy relative go out of their way to show you that stuff when you were a kid, but in the early 2000s before shit was fenced off into tiktok and such you could just stumble upon LS stuff etc. on limewire. The bright colorful nature of it would actually have appealed to kids, perversely enough. Such bullshit having to reckon with such things before your brain has even developed properly.
what's LS?
>tfw i remember back in the day being in an internet cafe all the way in the back hiding from sight and going to the ranma hentai gallery, which was a dedicated website just for fan translated ranma 1/2 doujins and artwork. i fapped the shit out of that site. every page would take 20-10 seconds to load but it was worth it.
>i'm shocked my parents never questioned the 56k noise restarting all night in my bedroom
My family had one computer in the living room. I would wait until night then pile up a bunch of pillows and couch cushions around the computer to muffle the sound of the modem.
this shit right here is why I hate zoomers so much. The lengths we had to go to to get a decent fap in were unreal compared to these ungrateful little fricks. I remember having to wait for my 3 brothers to leave the room so I can quickly search “big boobs” and then go to the bathroom to jerk off to the memory of the photos
haha christ, the bathroom sprint is all too real to me.
the DS or DSi had an internet browser and i'd go to paheal all the time on it, it was revolutionary having the porn in the bathroom with me
for me it was taking my brothers PSP into the bathroom and holding it up to the window to steal the neighbors wifi. This was like 2005 or 06 I guess and wireless internet wasn’t a household staple
yeah, and older generations hated you because you could search "big boobs" and get naked pictures for free.
That is true. I guess it really is just a vicious never ending cycle
>tfw your grandkids will be able to google "sex with anya taylor joy" and load up a photorealistic vr simulation where Anya rides them to completion while looking like she did in Split, with haptic feedback sensors that make it indistinguishable from reality
You can do that today
>your grandkids
you do realize where you are
I would hope that when fully realized automatic porn generation becomes reality, coomers won't be obsessed with and worship actresses. The idealized figure for all fetishes will be achieved by then. It won't be cult-like coomers making 10 billion videos of Emma Watson anymore. Autists won't imprint on the first female to ever give them a funny feeling and dedicate their entire sexual identity around them.
Kids today will never know the simple pleasures of jerking off to a Sears Catalogue.
SOUL
>tfw you were a teenager in the 90s with your own TV and HBO, Skinemax, and Showtime
It's a miracle I didn't jerk off myself to death.
I had a VCR too and recorded 4 or 5 tapes worth of softcore porn.
>tfw my friend spent the night one weekend and discovered my stash and demanded we watch all of them
Leaf here
Around 2006-7 there was a late night sex hotline ad that would play for 30 minutes after midnight
It featured 2 bawds in lingerie on a pure white studio background. One was a skinny brunette and the other was this bogged curvy blond who I thought was the hottest thing I ever seen.
I wish I could see it again, but I never will. I even tried looking at those videos of old VHS recordings of TV on youtube
This is more or less what I'm talking about here
I'm pretty sure they played on the Asian ch channels whatever they were called, and Global too maybe. This was around 2001-02
For me? It was using Live Links to talk to this girl long distance and racking up a big phone bill that my mom had to pay.
oh man my brother did this one time and got in so much trouble!!!
are you me? i don't know the specifics, but i remember my dad yelling at me for racking up some internet porn bill. my brother must have admitted to it and i have no idea what his punishment.
I did that once. I remember that ad used to come up on Nick At Nite. We called and traded the phone to jerk it to the b***hes voice.
Where can I find GGW episodes to download these days?
When we were teenagers one of the guys actually ordered it. Most underwhelming boobs ever is all I remember.
IFC and Sundance channel used to show movies with nudity uncensored after 11 P.M. or so. Diary of a Nymphomaniac was one I remember being aired quite a bit on Sundance. IFC had a documentary about nudity in films that I can't remember the name of, but it played every week iirc.
>mfw phone sex informercials would show extreme penetration, cumshots, etc. Also full on stripper routines
Shame they're all gone, lost history...
>im such a new homosexual i dont know how to use greentext properly
FTFY
Who are you quoting?
These commercials were really hot, I've always found the act of girls going wild in a time when such behavior was considered more taboo to be especially tantalizing.
Has anyone actually watched any of the movies they were advertising? You only ever hear people reminisce about the commercials.
I saw a couple, they were kind of awkward and uncomfortable
anyone else call random numbers with sex words in them like 1 800 SEX GIRL just to see if it worked. I remember being connected to one and hearing some automated recording of a woman in a seductive voice
To this day I don't know how letters correspond to dialing phone numbers
Jesus, you’re dumb
Each number had three letters, how the frick do you pick which one
you push it multiple times. its the same way we used to send sms using a t9 keypad.
can't tell if trolling or not
but you just press a number once when making a call
Texting while driving was so easy with t9. Man I miss that.
Frick off newbie zoomer you need to be 18 to post here.
I'm 27
Oh! Okay well that’s alright pal, that’s the same age as me! Sorry about that whole thing buddy, carry on and have a nice day okay?
>pic related
My first phone was an iPhone
You were probably upper middle class but that's not too weird. I remember getting my first cellphone right before the 2007 Transformers movie in June. I was 15. It wasn't super uncommon for highschoolers at my school to not have cellphones at the time. By my last year of high school though, it felt like everyone had them.
tl;dr I could see someone who was 12-18 around the time the iphone came out getting that as their first.
I did the same thing but with 1-800-butthole because I thought it was funny. I didn’t even expect a sex line, my middle school brain just thought it would be funny to call them and say “HAHAHA your number is butthole!!” When I realized what it was I hung up immediately and my parents asked me why there was an extra $12 tacked onto our phone bill at the end of the month I just played dumb and said I dunno.
Why would a 1-800 number rack up the phone bill? Those are supposed to be collect call.
I think it was 1 800 222 FRICK that had a live girl after only one prompt. We had a payphone by the B-C last name lockers, next to the Asst Principals office. His office lady is who you checked with if you were sick or getting on a different bus to go to a friend's house.
After a whole semester of pretending to call our mom's or whatever to listen to sexy talk on the payphone, we plotted to say this little dipshit's mom was on the line and make sure he was near it when the office lady picked up the phone, so she could "confirm" he was going to another kid's house. No sooner did she pick up the phone she hung it up, looked dead at us, and told us to go in our home hour room and wait for the gym teacher to dress us the frick down for half an hour.
Nothing sucked more ass than serving Saturday detention end of semester. Which wasn't even a Saturday. We had to come in the next fricking week when the AltEd kids were doing their "finals" in the moron room. Middle of June too cause there was a week's worth of snow days to make up. Frick you, Mrs. Aldridge, it wasn't worth it
Very boring, poorly written story.
BET safe harbor,
I busted hundreds of nuts as a young teen to GGW commercials and Brooke Burke hosting Wild On. Some nights I'd get really lucky and HBO would come in clearly, and I'd catch a good episode of Real Sex.
softcore hbo movies
zumba commercials
scrambled porn
that one playboy dad kept around for the articles
>be young and horny
>family too poor to afford cable tv
>have to get creative with what I used as fap material
Zoomers don’t know how easy they have it today. Literally unlimited access to all the porn on the world on their smart phones all at the comfort of their bedrooms.
agreed, we used to resort to stealing porno mags from the local bookstore
Always hated how much louder the commercial was and that one second warning at the beginning wasn't barely enough time to react.
Pic sorta related
for me it was pic related
i remember working the graveyard shift in a casino and around that time, the GGW infomercial would play in the breakroom. back then none of the women were offended, even the older ladies. everybody was just kinda snickering at it and nobody changed the channel. the shit was borderline softcore too. ahh, the good ole days
I remember as a kid dialing random 7-digit numbers to see if they went anywhere. Eventually I got the idea to add 1-800 to the beginning. The first one I tried was 1-800-ASS-HOLE and it was a phone sex line that opened with a 2 minute recording of a woman moaning. I don't know if it was really as hot as I remember it but I discovered it right around the age I discovered my penis and that audio was all I needed for a long time.
Man these nostalgia threads really showcase how absolutely pathetic americans are. All they can be nostalgic about are commercials, malls, video game consoles, movies.
The perfect consumer NPC country. I love watching it fall apart.
> Cinemaphile - Television & Film
why are people talking about tv on the tv board fricking americans reeeeeeeeee
kys satanic thirdie scum
Back to hell where you came from.
Yeah I'm sick of all those "generationology" muh childhood as a millennial vs muh childhood as a zoomer etc. posts. Is everyone here having a quarter life crisis or something?
your post is demonic. your mom wants you to have a nice day
You almost got me
You would have an argument if this wasnt the television and movies board
When I was a kid they're used to be porn rentals on Foxtel (Australia's cable provider)
They've gotten rid of it now but when it used to be on, every hour when the next porn movie changes the channel would be open for about 3 minutes before requiring a purchase.
Let's just say I saw quite a montage of fricking before the screen would lock me out
Hey zoomers. If your mom has a tatoo on hee lower back. She’s a bawd
COHF was best
>Pickup up the phone... pick up the phone...
>What's the matter, cat got your tongue?
i used to just turn on the weather channel, close my eyes and jerk off to the music
I miss irl prostitutes. Now they all stay at home and stream or make of content
For me it was copying and pasting “final fantasy hentai” into a word document, printing it out, and keeping it folded up in my wallet. I remember it fell out once in front of my mom while I buying a pack of yugioh cards and I told her it was homework. Luckily she didn’t push the issue
Be in UK. Have cable TV. Staying up late so you could watch Tutti Frutti on Rai Uno
luv me some early 90s women
I used to stay up to watch this show called Super Zapp or something like that. It'd start with a brief montage of Monster trucks and other extreme racing sports before getting to naked women, some of the strongest cooms I've ever had.
I tried to look it up can't find anything. anyone else seen it?
No mom, it's a travel show!
When I first started out, I used to jack it to Sherilyn Fenn on Rude Awakening. She didn't even dress sexily on that, her face was pretty much all you got. Tough times but eventually we got a copy of Stakeout and I was able to start jacking it to Madeleine Stowe's butt.
>I only kept it on, because in my Win98 PC I would run into an error where if it made the "wrong sound" it would crash my PC to startup.
I meant:
I only kept it on because if it made a certain sequence of tones my PC would crash to startup unless I disconnected it immediately before it continued.
i liked wild on with the other girl who wasn’t brooke burke
Jules Asner?
I stayed a hotel once in florida when I was a kid and it was late and I was flipping through channels and I found this very demonstrative infomercial for some kind of machine with a dildo on it for women. Like that thing was jamming it in her. I wish I could remember the name of the thing, unless it was an elaborate porno
anyone else ever jerk off to the underwear ads in the readers digest copy his mom left in the bathroom?
I'd steal my mom's Victoria's Secret catalogues out of the trash. Whenever there would be pictures of nipple pasties, I'd cum in an instant.
>channel hopping as a vaguely horny lad
>land on prime lindsay lohan and her ridiculously hot friends slapping each other's asses in tight jeans
>they're going wild or something someone told me
who was the hottest girls?
Hanna Hilton?
For me it’s Danni Ashe
What happened to her anyways?
Can anyone tell me the name of the girl in the hat on the cover? Her scene was so hot, I need to watch more of her. Many of the girls in the videos later did porn or were porn stars at the time of the filming.
Anybody remember Strip Poker? God the late 90s was a horny time.
Never seen this. Added to my 90s YouTube playlist. I can’t imagine this idea even being entertained by the USA network today. Hilarious.
I used to lock myself in my room and watch this, hoping that someone would lose so badly they'd have to strip nude.
LS was Ukrainian modeling in the early 2000s. The girls went with their mothers and for whatever reason they didn't have a problem with it. Was basically like a kids pantomime with nudity and no adults visible. Elaborate costumes and cartoon backgrounds that I suppose appealed to adult peds but also was actually quite non threatening to look at if you were a kid yourself (Unlike the shocking rape stuff floating about that would be immediately scary). A bizarre thing to encounter and have to process on your own when you're the same age as the girls involved.
Same
But i have since taken a more serious position on sexual immorality
Amen brother. I miss staying up until 4am printing out low quality porn jpgs to stash under my mattress...but I'll never do it again.
I vaguely remember some MTV spring break show that had one or two girls washing some bus and announcers being raunchy until they later asked that they were underage, but i cant find the clip
i remember it vividly
Just set it and homosexual!
I cannot describe how many times I watched this entire infomercial. This and the original magic bullet ones were perfect
I love you homosexuals sometimes
If you pressed the a/b remote button while on a pay-per-view porn channel you could catch a few milliseconds of titty.
Old porn is better too, less plastic, makeup and fatties.
sad but true and it has even gotten worse with covid
My dad bought the Blind Date Too WILD For TV DVD and I jacked off to it. I dropped the DVD during clean up and actually dripped cum on the disc.
I really miss the early 00's. The fashion, the music, and before the advent of high-speed Internet. And most of all, there weren't as many obese girls back then. I'm not talking about fat. Fat to me is 20-30 pounds overweight. She can still be pretty and just needs to get in shape with running, aerobics, dance, etc.
What I can't understand is thinking obesity is beautiful. An obese woman is not attractive to a dude (unless he's REALLY into chubby chasing) nor is an obese dude attractive to a woman.
And women didn't slather themselves with all sorts of tattoos. I mean, something tasteful like a small one on your wrist or ankle is fine, but why ruin your gorgeous skin and body with something that's going to sag and stretch when you get older?
literally the israelites.
the did webm related to the west since the 60s. now you see the effect.
>And women didn't slather themselves with all sorts of tattoos. I mean, something tasteful like a small one on your wrist or ankle is fine, but why ruin your gorgeous skin and body with something that's going to sag and stretch when you get older?
I blame Suicide Girls (And to a lesser extent FrontArmy, Lowrider Magazine, and Sailor Jerry ads.).
At the time it was a rare novelty to see erotica or porn featuring alt girls with facial piercings, outrageously dyed hair, natural boobs, and tattoos. I admit I fapped and spilled a fair volume of ejaculate to Suicide Girls.
And I still consider the types of tattoos, piercings, and hairdos from SG rather tasteful.
But then mainstream porn started to feature all of that but still maintained the status quo of fake stiff Omega implants.
>PS: I want airline strips and carefully shaped topiary art pubes (like heart shaped) to make a comeback.
I look at that redhead and just shake my head with all those tattoos. I mean, I get maybe having that purple flower on her arm, but she looks like a yakuza woman with those fish and other motifs painted on her.
Remember Alizee? That Corsican pop singer? She ruined herself with those tattoos of Sailor Moon and Tinkerbell.
Porn in general has taken a nosedive. I quit watching new stuff cause anymore it's all boring 1 on 1 or the girl has tattoos and piercings all over, huge insane breasts or is a land whale. I remember when a girl doing least 1 gangbang scene was sort of a required thing. (Gangbang girl series for ex). Now a girl can go her whole porn career just doing 1 on 1.
>I really miss the early 00's.
I love the Y2K era, 1997 to 2003?
2003
>ProtoPolTards and Cinemaphile posters b***hed about Lana's raceswap. (Pete's casting barely made a peep oddly enough.)
>Bitched and moaned endlessly about "Krypto's Kreek/Kal-El's Kreek/Clark's Creek" and the poor writing.
>Were incensed when Clark had pre-marital sex. With some boomers from other parts of the internet even calling it child pornography because the characters were minors even when the actors were pushing 30.
2023
>Lana is best girl and Kristin Kreuk is classic waifu.
>Seen as wholesome and comfy nostalgic show.
>b***h about modern superheroes being capeshit while citing Smallville as peak cape kino.
ESL non-burger here.
I remember this bit from an erotic/softcore TV series of sorts back in the late 90's early 00's, it was like an anthology series with a few bits per episode, or maybe the episodes were really short, like 10 or 15 minutes long.
Origin I believe was European, possibly french but not really sure, nigtht have been murrican or australian or whatever the frick, since they dub everything here, but something tells me France for some reason.
In this bit I'm talking about there was a young guy traveling in a train, then along came some woman with short blonde hair(I think it was blonde hair and it was short, but not sure), kinda older than him, they started talking and flirting and I think he mentioned he had a gf, but either way she ended up giving him a handjob under a towel or a jacket or something, you couldn't see anything because it was all softcore.
This shit made an impact on me on the buckets I coomed, always on my head but never found again.
Help me fellow old time coomers.
Wish I could but you’re essentially describing everything that aired on cinemax from 10pm to 2am for over a decade
Has anyone ever actually seen one of these shows and not just the ads for them?
Yes I downloaded them off of DC Plus way back in college in 2003. The one I saw had this gorgeous tanned girl in a pink bikini riding this plastic tube. Cummed buckets
The 90's was the golden age of porn
2000s was the great time period that there will ever be for amateur content.
When I was in undergrad, there were a frickton of nudes that girls posted online for the world to see. And these were for fun, not montetizing like Onlyfans does. 2 girls in my college campus did this and 1 of them was this mousey israeli med student but holy shit her breasts were glorious.
1997 to 2004 was peak comfy for early millenials in high school and college.
Well shit, glad I wasn't on Cinemaphile back then. Never even knew Kristen was half-Chinese until years later. My dorm mate had a whole collage dedicated to her.
>Never even knew Kristen was half-Chinese until years later.
Do you not have eyes? Can you not see her eyes? Or proportions of her nose and placement in relation to her cheeks and eyes? She's the encyclopedic example of a Hapa.
I could tell she had some kind of mixed ancestry, but wasn't sure what. I didn't have Asians in my hometown and I never met a hapa IRL at the time.
I would stay up late to watch either Fashion TV lingerie or bikini shows, Cathouse or Nuticias (news show from Portugal where she undresses one piece per news).
This reminded me I have to watch more Y2K movies I never watched back in the day. Bout to watch Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen.
Daily reminder that your parents knew. I matter how sneaky or clever you thought you were, your parents always knew.
Nah I never watched the scrambled channels at my house nor did I watch porn on our PC. There was an older kid in the neighborhood who would burn porn on CDs for us. All we had to pay for was the blank CDs which he would burn free of charge.