>did you know >that every action >has its equal opposite reaction
>cuts to main character >actually i did >mentor smirks >shots of cities under sunrise, slight lens flare
>asian man in suit walking down metropolitan italian street on phone >white man puts out cigarette >so you wanna start something do ya? >vyooooooooooooooooooooop.... >he wieners a comically large sci-fi weapon >gonna need a pretty big gun
>fast shots of action >protagonist running faster than cars >i thought i wanted to stop the fighting >i thought i wanted to end the wars >but the battlefield......... >character turns to the camera in enemy uniform >screen goes black, whoosh sound >.........is my natural habitat
>this summer... >everyone's favorite plumber... >is coming to the big screen >*cuts to bowser voiced by Jack Black* What a bummer! >*Ke$ha starts playing* WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE IM P DIDDY >*Mario wakes up giddy for the moning as Peach is carried away in the distance, his alarm is still going off and he can't hear her, scrolls through some messages, looks up as he's about to read "princess peach kidnapped" remember to take up luigi, who's alarm is the local radio >"in other news, princess peach has been-" >Mario, voiced by Chris Pratt "It's a me! Your brother, Mario! We need to get an early start on our day if we're going to get anything done!" >Luigi, voiced by Charlie Day, "just go on without me, man" >Mario: "but together we are the super Mario brothers! Without you I'm just... Regular Mario Brother." >two brothers will find themselves >Mario "what?! Peach is missing?" >Luigi "really?" >and maybe Peach >Mario "and bowser took her?” >Luigi "wow REALLY?" >but first they have to find Bowser >bowser: "I know what girls like!" >*presents a bundle of fire flowers to Peach* "fire flower?" >*Peach kicks him in the balls* >"AAAAA My fire balls!” >who might need to be saved from peach >peach, voiced by who do you fricking think, it's Anya Taylor-Joy "I keep inviting you to go kart riding, to play golf, to parties, and even to the Olympic Games AND THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT ME?!” >this summer is going to be >*montage of slap stick* >*bowser twerking* >Mario "aaawkward" >this summer is going to be... >*montage that's pretty much the inevitable dance party ending* >*toad doing a head spin* >"LIIIIIIIIT" >this summer is going to be! >*montage of every time they say "super" in the movie >SUPER >Super Mario Bros
the brown note™
>pop song in minor key with shit ton of reverb at 50% speed
BWWWWWWOOOOOwwwwwmmMMMMM
the same piano note being played slightly faster
Black folk
A MAN EMBARKS ON A QUEST…..*record scratch* AND HIS DOG?!?!
Yeah. That's me.
No, not him.
The dog.
>did you know
>that every action
>has its equal opposite reaction
>cuts to main character
>actually i did
>mentor smirks
>shots of cities under sunrise, slight lens flare
>asian man in suit walking down metropolitan italian street on phone
>white man puts out cigarette
>so you wanna start something do ya?
>vyooooooooooooooooooooop....
>he wieners a comically large sci-fi weapon
>gonna need a pretty big gun
>fast shots of action
>protagonist running faster than cars
>i thought i wanted to stop the fighting
>i thought i wanted to end the wars
>but the battlefield.........
>character turns to the camera in enemy uniform
>screen goes black, whoosh sound
>.........is my natural habitat
>TITLE CARD
>BWUM BWUM BWUM BWUM
>JULY 10TH
>IMAX
>DOLBY
>popcorn crunch
>"i wanna see that"
>"fricking gay"
Witness one woman’s journey…
>She'll make her-story
Into a hardcore porno
>I’m stuffed worse than after thanksgiving!
A woman's sexual journey in the hood
>popular 80’s song in a minor key, sung at half speed but [CURRENT POPULAR FEMALE]
Really wanna kill some puppies every time I hear that shit
>sometimes I feel
>I’ve got to
>BWAAA BWAAA
>ruuuuun awayyyyyyyy
>BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>this summer...
>everyone's favorite plumber...
>is coming to the big screen
>*cuts to bowser voiced by Jack Black* What a bummer!
>*Ke$ha starts playing* WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE IM P DIDDY
>*Mario wakes up giddy for the moning as Peach is carried away in the distance, his alarm is still going off and he can't hear her, scrolls through some messages, looks up as he's about to read "princess peach kidnapped" remember to take up luigi, who's alarm is the local radio
>"in other news, princess peach has been-"
>Mario, voiced by Chris Pratt "It's a me! Your brother, Mario! We need to get an early start on our day if we're going to get anything done!"
>Luigi, voiced by Charlie Day, "just go on without me, man"
>Mario: "but together we are the super Mario brothers! Without you I'm just... Regular Mario Brother."
>two brothers will find themselves
>Mario "what?! Peach is missing?"
>Luigi "really?"
>and maybe Peach
>Mario "and bowser took her?”
>Luigi "wow REALLY?"
>but first they have to find Bowser
>bowser: "I know what girls like!"
>*presents a bundle of fire flowers to Peach* "fire flower?"
>*Peach kicks him in the balls*
>"AAAAA My fire balls!”
>who might need to be saved from peach
>peach, voiced by who do you fricking think, it's Anya Taylor-Joy "I keep inviting you to go kart riding, to play golf, to parties, and even to the Olympic Games AND THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT ME?!”
>this summer is going to be
>*montage of slap stick*
>*bowser twerking*
>Mario "aaawkward"
>this summer is going to be...
>*montage that's pretty much the inevitable dance party ending*
>*toad doing a head spin*
>"LIIIIIIIIT"
>this summer is going to be!
>*montage of every time they say "super" in the movie
>SUPER
>Super Mario Bros
I just realized I have no idea what Anya Taylor-Joy's voice sounds like despite participating in dozens of threads about her.
>EAR SPLITTING FART NOISE
FROM THE CREATORS OF FARTFANTASY.COM
>E
>E
>E
>low E
>D#
>D#
>D#
>low D#
>C#
>C#
>C#
>low C#
>A
>A
>G#
>E
>LOOK AT YA LOOK AT YA LOOK AT YA LOOK AT YA
SEE THE MOVIE THAT NETFLIX GREENLIT FOR A SIX SEASON SERIES
STARRING:
MILLIE BOBBY BROWN AS "WALLED c**t"
MICHAEL PENA AS “OH YEAH, THAT GUY”
BRUCE WILLIS
>Hey, uhhh… um… what are we…?
IN THE BEGINNING
GOD CREATED THE UNIVERSE
AND CHUDS HAVE BEEN SEETHING EVER SINCE
I know this is a meme thread but what trailers do you unironically consider kino? Regardless of how the actual movie was?
There's definitely an art to making a good trailer
For me its
this one sold me a completely different movie from what I actually got. Not mad because Titane was good but, still, the trailer is great
Also The Batman's trailer, with the slow walk to the Penguin
this is probably the only good movie trailer
Anyone have the Come and See 2 pasta?
newbies ruining these threads.
Shame.
BRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP
I realize I haven't see a trailer in years
Cinemaphile is my trailer.
oh frick
you're right