"So you see, Lisa, even God himself endorses Whacking Day.". "Lemme see that.". "No."

"So you see, Lisa, even God himself endorses Whacking Day."

"Lemme see that."

"No."

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Catholicism unironically did this for centuries

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I've got 95 reasons too why you suck

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        You wouldn't be allowed to read the bible if it wasn't because of Luther.
        Catholics literally declared you guilty of heresy if you translated the bible and distributed it.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Simpons mixed in proties and cathies when it suited the writers needs

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Ignorance of the scriptures is ignorance of Christ.

      - Martin Luther probably

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        The Catholic Church literally prohibited people reading the Bible.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          no they prohibited and burned people who were making translations of the bible to languages that were not latin, they had to keep the copyright.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            >no they prohibited and burned people who were making translations of the bible to languages that were not latin, they had to keep the copyright.
            The intent was clear, making it impossible for anyone who wasn't a Catholic priest to read the bible.
            They also burned you if you translated the greek texts to any language instead of using their latin version because the Catholic version memory holes israeli traditions and most remarkably prohibits idolatry.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Yes, and look what happened when it was released to the general public. Untolds thousands of sects, many of them deviating so that they abandoned the trinity (Jehovah's witnesses, Mormons).

          Scripture is inerrant, but that doesn't mean that its meaning is obvious. Just look at the people in this thread who think that the Old Covenant is still in force for Christians.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            I hate to say this but I prefer it like this.
            Sects originate in stuff that is already prohibited in the bible or is based on new texts made by fake prophets.
            If you really are searching the truth your brain will eventually click into place and you will realize it.
            Just like the most obvious censorship in Catholic bibles jumps to your eyes even if you aren't a religious person because the tone is all over the place and it's obviously a product of two different writing styles.
            Same if you compare the spiritual choice of tone and words in the bible Vs. The trash in the Talmud

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Sounds based.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            You know repeating "based" doesn't automatically make something right do you?

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Thats not what it means.
              Where did you come from.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >I just shot the neighbor's dog
                >based
                See? It doesn't make the action acceptable.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                was it a pitbull?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Why don't we teach what the bible says anymore?
      It used to be woke to turn water into wine but now society tells me to do the opposite.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >le old dispensation still in force face

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, but slavery became unacceptable to human institutions.
        Most biblical people accepted common laws as far as those didn't mess with their relationship with God.
        As for the Sabbath, there's a lot of things that (arguably) became optional in Christianity when Jesus basically gave the right to all non israelites of being saved by him. I say "arguably" because it's all in discussion since 2000 years ago...

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous
      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        You suck, McBain!

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah but the character is protestant, freedom to read the Bible is what protestantism used to be about.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >either as killing or jacking off
      I get it

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I was 9 years old when that episode aired. Thanks for reminding me that even as a child I had shit tastes

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Oh yeah, and you remember Mathew 21:17.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      And he left them and went out of the city to Bethany, where he lodged there?

  4. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >lmao religion is le bad!
    Nice message, look where it got us.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >religion is le immune from criticism
      People use God's name for whatever bullshit they want to spin. That deserves to be made fun of.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        No thats not what I meant
        But growing up in the 90s every single show and movie was lol religion bad lol religion bad and I was not nor am I now religious, but it was pretty ridiculous

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Oh so NOW you want to be reasonable, when you've been spamming the same message ad verbatim in this thread?

          In b4 "That's not me" Yeah no frick off.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            >says “In b4”
            >in after

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              But that legit was a different anon.

              Timing is off. And if true, then I'm sorry. A lot of "so called good Christians" acting obnonxious on Cinemaphile lately that they make the Bible Scripture spammers on youtube seem civil in comparison.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                I closed the thread and then came back and I see my reply being copied and spammed, dont apologize but also dont be so quick to get mad because thats what shitposters want.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            But that legit was a different anon.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          welcome to Gen X now enjoy your stay

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        No thats not what I meant
        But growing up in the 90s every single show and movie was lol religion bad lol religion bad and I was not nor am I now religious, but it was pretty ridiculous

        Oh also I am not that moron that just copied my message and used it to reply to you and its now getting banned. I only posted that once, the first time.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      You mean 9/11?

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >9/11 was caused by Muslims watching the Simpsons
        Checks out

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          They just wanted to see that prose which justified the invasion

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Substituting one religion for another. The more things change the more they stay the same.

  5. 2 years ago
    Boco

    I'm sick of you people! You're nothing but a pack of fickle mush heads!

  6. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I never liked this episode. It has this uncanny valley quality to it that puts me off.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      John Swartzwelder episodes are like that. Quite a few of them are very surreal and give you the heebie-jeebies. Itchy and Scratchy Land is another one.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        That may be, but reading his life story he sounds pretty based
        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Swartzwelder

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Every last one of these would be in character for a Simpsons episode.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >This is a very dangerous way to run a television show, leaving the artists in charge of the art, but it worked out all right in the end. It rained money on the Fox lot for thirty years. There’s a lesson in there somewhere.

          Heh

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        the guy was always a bit of an outlier because he was 40 when the show started while many of the writers were kids fresh out of college. he was also probably the most politically right leaning guy on the writing team.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          He’s like the Fletcher Hanks of the Simpsons

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          SCHWARTZwelder is a lib cuck, like all "most right leaning guys" on teams before 2014.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            He’s certainly not a cuck. A man as determined to smoke as he is couldn’t be a cuck
            >By 1994, with the show's sixth season, Swartzwelder was granted a special dispensation and allowed not to attend rewrite sessions with the rest of the staff, instead being allowed to send drafts of his scripts in from home so other writers could revise them as they saw fit. This was reportedly a result of Swartzwelder's heavy smoking coming into conflict with a newly implemented policy banning smoking in the writers' room.
            >According to Simpsons creator Matt Groening, Swartzwelder wrote Simpsons episodes sitting in a booth at a coffee shop "drinking copious amounts of coffee and smoking endless cigarettes". When California passed an anti-smoking law, Swartzwelder bought the booth and installed it in his house, allowing him to continue his process in peace.[12]

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              SCHWARTZwelder is a lib cuck, like all "most right leaning guys" on teams before 2014.

              all boomers are way harder even the left-leaning ones were 10x more badass than Millenials will ever be. Millenial males are pathetically weak and filled with estrogen.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I dont like it because its a "lisa is a c**t and ruins something fun for everyone" episode

  7. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Its fricking snakes, not gophers or birds, frick snakes, God I hate lisa.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Snakes kill pests and they’re cool.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Hey, snakes are cool.

        Snakes are the Irish of the animal kingdom. Prove me wrong

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          What the frick does that even mean?

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          I thought those were honey badgers.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Nice try python, but you won't escape Florida man.

    • 2 years ago
      Boco

      Hey, snakes are cool.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      As much as I hate snakes they are indeed useful they similar to owls and foxes are rodent killing machines. If anything humans should bring back Cat Burning, cats are gathered in a special cage and burned to death. Cats are not good rodent control, cats kill ecosystems especially due to being globally invasive, cats even ruin human food production by shitting where farmers start growing food that will eventually be sold to people, and no cats are not a good source of food. Cat flesh is so awful full of terrible things and parasites that even animals who feed on corpses like vultures can get sick from eating cats. Cats are absolutely useless damaging animals to everything and everyone that the only reason cats have flourished is due to how they look to humans and because of human ignorance of how destructive these global pests are. Mankind would be doing a service to itself and nature by killing cats and killing them by burning their bodies to destroy all the bacteria and parasites.

      And no I'm not joking. Cats truly are shit incarnate. I hope to see the day that cats are banned from being pets. Hell even Islam a religion that worships cats is attempting to get rid of cats:

      https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-62205744

      It's going to be a harsh fight, but eventually pets will get banned.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Wrong, without cats humans would die to pests.
        Nice bbc propaganda link bro

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Cats themselves ARE the vermin. The only thing cats do is teach mice and rats to be much more stealthy. You still got rodents in the area and no the cat is not going to somehow go through walls to get at the rodents making their nest between the walls of a structure. Cats are useless parasites. And cats hate dealing with rats because rats will bite them to hell and back, cats hate targets that fight back.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        peta moron or just regular moron? You decide

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          The shit eating idiot is you.

  8. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Stop whacking it in my trailer!

  9. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    What do you get our of spinning people's message like this? And yet you wonder why everyone here hates you and your kind.

    Oh, wait. Next you'll tell me I'm a godless heathen because I snapped at you for twisting people's words to fit your argument. Makes me wonder if you are even a so-called good honest Christian by behaving like a blatant snake.

  10. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    but God whacked the first snake, it's like at the very begining of the bible, then things get weird.

  11. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    ....all christcucks get the rope.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      well yes, we always get the rope to hang trannies and withces, been doing it for centuries and will keep doing it to your kind as long as the world exists 🙂

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