based noticer
the madela effect is a cia psyop to make you trust wikipedia over your own memories >there were always chemtrails >it was always magic mirror not mirror mirror >biden wasn't a comically demented senior citizen president you're misremembering
dunno, got depressed about mine dying when he turned 9, spent the last 4 years just waiting for it to happen, he got cancer a year or two before we put him down.
Might as well just have a great dog and enjoy him fully for 8 years, instead of having this random dice roll of whether they croak at 10 or 15
Gonna have to respectfully disagree. Great Pyrenees are the best. Livestock guardians are great dogs in general but the GP is a cut above the rest. They're so great that one was the repeat mayor of Cormorant Minnesota. >tfw miss my GP/Springer mutt
>The barrels we see around the dogs' necks in paintings and cartoons is the invention of a kid named Edwin Landseer. In 1820, Landseer, a 17-year-old painter from England, produced a work titled Alpine Mastiffs Reanimating a Distressed Traveler. The painting portrays two Saint Bernards standing over a fallen traveler, one dog barking in alarm, the other attempting to revive the traveler by licking his hand. The dog doing the licking has a barrel strapped around its neck, which Landseer claimed contains brandy.
>Despite the fact that brandy wouldn't be something you'd want if you were trapped in a blizzard — alcohol causes blood vessels to dilate, resulting in blood rushing to your skin and your body temperature decreasing rapidly — and that the dogs never carried such barrels, the collar keg stuck in the public's imagination and the image has endured.
>Despite the fact that brandy wouldn't be something you'd want if you were trapped in a blizzard — alcohol causes blood vessels to dilate, resulting in blood rushing to your skin and your body temperature decreasing rapidly
Do they know this in 1820? People have always warmed up with booze since it cause more warmth for your extremities.
I think it was common sense that it would heat you up, since it feels like it makes you hotter. I read a novel from the 1920's where a couple kids almost drown in ice-cold water, and the fishermen who pull them out of the water wrap them in blankets and make them drink rum to heat them up.
Lots of old common sense things are just wrong. You'll still find people today saying you shouldn't eat before swimming and that kind of shit, so it's not like we're any better now.
Yeah, but there's a difference when this happens while you're on the ground, or swimming in the sea where you can't stand on your feet you stupid idiot
t. went swimming with friends as a kid after eating mcdonalds and a couple of frozen beers, suddenly I had stomach cramps while I was at a good 10 meters from the shore. I assure you it was NOT a fun experience
>couple kids almost drown in ice-cold water, and the fishermen who pull them out of the water wrap them in blankets and make them drink rum to heat them up. >make them drink rum to heat them up. >drink rum to heat them up. >heat them up.
early civilization was wild
>The 19th century was "early civilization"
Okay, who's gonna tell him
6 months ago
Anonymous
>no electricity >no phones >poc had no rights >women had no rights >religious nutjobs controlled society
whats the difference from that to the stone age 1000 years before? nothing.
6 months ago
Anonymous
>>poc had no rights
had no rights
And they were better times for it, lol.
6 months ago
Anonymous
When you think about it, PoC living as a sub-set of anglo culture was always a joke though. Like lol you're basically slaves with more rights and part time terrorists used by the government to control property value. The entire idea of vying for rights in a civilization that you neither control nor are really a part of is insanity. Either conquer a land for yourself or leave.
>alcohol causes blood vessels to dilate
Akshully, alcohol has both constrictive and dilative actions on blood vessels, and these effects are dependent on race, the dose and timing of alcohol consumption.
Deboonkers today will simultaneously claim "it was just one kid who drew a painting"
and "people back then were retarded and didn't know it actually kills you"
I think it was common sense that it would heat you up, since it feels like it makes you hotter. I read a novel from the 1920's where a couple kids almost drown in ice-cold water, and the fishermen who pull them out of the water wrap them in blankets and make them drink rum to heat them up.
Lots of old common sense things are just wrong. You'll still find people today saying you shouldn't eat before swimming and that kind of shit, so it's not like we're any better now.
Learned men who use the pen have wrote its praises high
O sweet poteen from Ireland green distilled of wheat and rye
But away your pills, it will cure all ill whether pagan or Christian or israelite
So take off your coat and grease your throat with the real old mountain dew!
I remember looking this up specifically back in 2010. There used to be a wiki article on it. Now you're telling me they're trying to say they never did this and it was fabricated by some child?
This is absolutely false, I don't care what anyone says. I know what I read.
>wouldn't be something you'd want
Because dog sled teams are known for their grasp of science and medicine and would never want a stiff drink during a long day of work to make their chest feel warm.
>Pies cool on windowsills >Bums carry bindles on their shoulders >Refrigerators are just a metal cabinet with a giant ice cube in it >Dogcatchers are omnipresent >fucking quicksand
>drunk fella has a red nose from all the drinking as he lays with a bottle of wine on a street gutter with the passing cars splashing puddle water on him
the red nose from drunkenness is a myth, it originated in france from an anti-alcohol campaign in the late 1800s, the campaign basically said you could identify a "good for nothing drunk" by their offputting smell and bright red nose. it somehow remained in the public perception.
Quicksand was suck a prevalent trope in movies that a previously nonexistant fetish was born. When quicksand stopped being such a meme, the fetish mostly disappeared. Seriously, look it up
>Pies cool on windowsills >Bums carry bindles on their shoulders >Refrigerators are just a metal cabinet with a giant ice cube in it >Dogcatchers are omnipresent >fucking quicksand
>Pies cool on windowsills >Bums carry bindles on their shoulders >Refrigerators are just a metal cabinet with a giant ice cube in it >Dogcatchers are omnipresent >fucking quicksand
>Before eating a prey, the Cat hones its claws with a metal file
>Pies cool on windowsills >Bums carry bindles on their shoulders >Refrigerators are just a metal cabinet with a giant ice cube in it >Dogcatchers are omnipresent >fucking quicksand
>chinaman has a straw hat and buck teeth and bows while he talks
supposedly that yellow fat cap is what you get from grass fed cattle
they mostly eat cereals nowadays and thats where the exaggerated marbling comes from
Grain fed (or finished) beef tends to have larger fat caps and more marbling but it's white. The yellow in grass fed comes from beta carotene but they're normally leaner and so smaller fat caps
>It does, not in muttmerica though.
yeah and our eggs have yellow yolks instead of orange like real eggs, and our butter is whiteish instead of yellow >the land of confusion
>character realizes they're not standing on solid ground >seems hesitant to look down at the air under them >finally looks down >looks back at viewer >plummets down with their head saying in place and neck stretching
>someone gets shot in the face at point blank range >his head is covered in soot and spins around >slowly stops when facing the camera and he blinks a few times this thread smells of Warner Bros shilling but fuck it
>chicken is a genius entrepreneur, nobody realizes he's a chicken until someone points it out or he pecks at birdseed, lays an egg etc or through no fault of his own gets called a chicken.
>someone gets shot in the face at point blank range >his head is covered in soot and spins around >slowly stops when facing the camera and he blinks a few times this thread smells of Warner Bros shilling but fuck it
>villain wants to shoot you at point blank with a rifle >you just put your index finger in the barrel >gun explodes in the face of the shooter while you remain completely unharmed
>Tom gets launched into a telephone pole/jetty pylon/collumn >knocks out a perfectly cut chunk his exact height >pole floats for a beat before flattening Tom like an accordion
>this, quickly followed by a bone-in ham >then a whole bunch of bananas eaten by squeezing them one by one and shooting them into the air in a big arc, falling into their open mouth >then the french waiter - who has been just as rapidly bringing these courses out, each under a big metal dome lid - gets to the bowl of soup >Characters looks in and their eyes bug out >there's a dozen flies doing synchronized swimming to a lively full orchestra waltz while one on the rim playing a tiny classical guitar with 4 of its arms and singing in italian >closeup on the singing fly, he gets a solo >the character is so pissed that his hat flips and stream shoots out of his ears
Pretty sure in a lot of early Daffy cartoons he is seen flying though. I think there was pretty good one where Elmer shoots him down. It's one of those animal abilities that just pops up only when it's funny like when Bugs can dig underground at extreme speeds.
>character paints a black circle on the side of a cliff >other character runs straight into it and instead of smashing into a wall gets flattened by a locomotive chugging at full speed out of the painted circle
>main character cross dresses for the villain at the cabaret >stretches his legs out from behind the curtain >seductivly walks on stage with his face behind a fan >pulls the villain towards >hits him with a hammer
>Drunk people hiccup
I understand that it's something that really happens because alcohol dehydrates you, but it's weird how reliably it happens in old cartoons whereas I can't think of a single instance of it happening in live fiction.
If only I worked at ACME CORP and just spent all day making weirdly specific gadgets for cartoon characters to commit acts of physical violence against each other with
It's very comfortable. >winter night time >leave window open for that fresh, crispy cold air full of oxygen >get into the thick blankets and put on my night cap >pull it over my ears and eyes >sleep like a rock for 12 hours
>Characters get into a fight >Cloud of dust appears with different body parts popping in and out >Fight ends >Characters are immediately covered with band-aids and casts and an ice bag on their head
>Baby somehow gets out of the house >Parents/Babysitter completely oblivious to this >Its up to the family pet to save it >Always ends up at a construction site with I beams >Pet saves the baby but gets reprimanded for some reason
So I assume beside the baby booming there were dead babies everywhere during the same period.
>he never wore a propeller hat >he never wore suspenders holding up gray shorts >he never had a blue-and-white striped shirt >he was never morbidly obese as a 10 year old >he never constantly held a lollipop >he never had big, red cheeks and a bright smile
>character is drinking from a bottle and drunkenly singing "OH DANNY BOOPOY, THE PIPES THE PIPES ARE - *hiccup* - CAAAAAALLIIIIIING" >wacky happening passes by them >character rubs eyes, looks at the bottle, then chucks it over their shoulder, looks directly at the camera, and says "Never again!"
>See attractive woman out in public dressed provocatively >Cartoon heart pops in and out of my chest as I begin involuntarily stomping my foot and whistling
>ugly kid is poor and brown >rich kid is handsome and blonde >ugly kid is good and everyone loves him >rich kid is mean and is hated by everyone, specially his father
Which one were you? I was poor but also hated by everyone, specially my father, haha.
this is how i want to die
alternatively this happens to me
>someone gets shot in the face at point blank range >his head is covered in soot and spins around >slowly stops when facing the camera and he blinks a few times this thread smells of Warner Bros shilling but fuck it
Such a good alternative of this in Ed Edd n Eddy. The Ed’s get a jawbreaker in one of the later seasons and Eddy is holding in up and Ed immediately tries to suck it out of his hand but at the last second Eddy switches hands and is holding a skunk and Ed slurps it up and his eyes start watering and green skunk stink is coming out of his ears.
>character is comfortably in bed on his side with his night cap on just about to fall asleep >alley cats start screeching, forcing him to get up and start throwing shit at them >nothing ever hits
>guy in saloon spits tobacco juice >hits spittoon with a loud ring >bonus points if he's outside where there's no spittoon but there's a ring anyway >double bonus points if he's grasshopper.
looking after my nephew recently and the cartoons he watches are absolutely devoid of the SOVL ITT
it's actually so brain-dead to the point of being kinda unnerving
supposedly that was never a thing
Well I heard it was
Then thousands of cartoon are lying to me? I doubt it
They're rewriting history since they don't want you to know how good we had it
based noticer
the madela effect is a cia psyop to make you trust wikipedia over your own memories
>there were always chemtrails
>it was always magic mirror not mirror mirror
>biden wasn't a comically demented senior citizen president you're misremembering
Based. Been saying this for ages. That dress bullshit was the first really big suggestibility test
>That dress bullshit was the first really big suggestibility test
kony2012 but yeah, the dress was a massive psyop experiment
It's still Mirror mirror on the Spanish translation
Then why can I buy one, huh, fuck face???
I need to finance my dogs neck barrel
Damn you mean they didn't make martinis after they found people that were buried under snow/rubble?
yes it was before all the racemixing
St Bernard is the most kino dog IMO.
I refuse to believe this isn't true.
just wish it didn't require a snow shovel to scoop up its shit
It's not true, a 17 year old artist in England made it up, during the Victorian era.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/the-myth-of-the-st-bernard-and-the-brandy-barrel
We can see who would have drunk the kool aid. Try being critical of what you read instead of just accepting it.
>dailybeast
You are factually correct, to bad they only live to like 8
This is why I can't buy a big dog, it would break my heart to have a dog die that soon.
dunno, got depressed about mine dying when he turned 9, spent the last 4 years just waiting for it to happen, he got cancer a year or two before we put him down.
Might as well just have a great dog and enjoy him fully for 8 years, instead of having this random dice roll of whether they croak at 10 or 15
Gonna have to respectfully disagree. Great Pyrenees are the best. Livestock guardians are great dogs in general but the GP is a cut above the rest. They're so great that one was the repeat mayor of Cormorant Minnesota.
>tfw miss my GP/Springer mutt
>The barrels we see around the dogs' necks in paintings and cartoons is the invention of a kid named Edwin Landseer. In 1820, Landseer, a 17-year-old painter from England, produced a work titled Alpine Mastiffs Reanimating a Distressed Traveler. The painting portrays two Saint Bernards standing over a fallen traveler, one dog barking in alarm, the other attempting to revive the traveler by licking his hand. The dog doing the licking has a barrel strapped around its neck, which Landseer claimed contains brandy.
>Despite the fact that brandy wouldn't be something you'd want if you were trapped in a blizzard — alcohol causes blood vessels to dilate, resulting in blood rushing to your skin and your body temperature decreasing rapidly — and that the dogs never carried such barrels, the collar keg stuck in the public's imagination and the image has endured.
>Despite the fact that brandy wouldn't be something you'd want if you were trapped in a blizzard — alcohol causes blood vessels to dilate, resulting in blood rushing to your skin and your body temperature decreasing rapidly
Do they know this in 1820? People have always warmed up with booze since it cause more warmth for your extremities.
I think it was common sense that it would heat you up, since it feels like it makes you hotter. I read a novel from the 1920's where a couple kids almost drown in ice-cold water, and the fishermen who pull them out of the water wrap them in blankets and make them drink rum to heat them up.
Lots of old common sense things are just wrong. You'll still find people today saying you shouldn't eat before swimming and that kind of shit, so it's not like we're any better now.
Have fun getting eaten by leeches, retard.
>You'll still find people today saying you shouldn't eat before swimming
This shit pisses me off so much. My wife insists on it because she used to be a lifeguard and got told this bullshit.
Literally the only negative is you MIGHT feel a bit sick because you're exerting yourself after just eating food, like literally any other exercise.
>you MIGHT feel a bit sick
so what you're saying is it's better not to eat before you swim?
not him but I've heard people say that you could die if you went swimming after you ate
The dying part comes from getting cramps and drowning.
Yeah, and you die if you fall asleep with an electric fan on.
thats only with the door and windows closed you mongoloid
>mongoloid
Only mongoloids (i.e. Koreans) believe that shit.
It still doesn’t kill you.
>you MIGHT feel a bit sick
Yeah, but there's a difference when this happens while you're on the ground, or swimming in the sea where you can't stand on your feet you stupid idiot
t. went swimming with friends as a kid after eating mcdonalds and a couple of frozen beers, suddenly I had stomach cramps while I was at a good 10 meters from the shore. I assure you it was NOT a fun experience
Read about Charles Joughin he survived freezing cold by getting wasted
Top lad
you probably shouldnt eat before swimming, you will likely feel bloated and fucked up
>couple kids almost drown in ice-cold water, and the fishermen who pull them out of the water wrap them in blankets and make them drink rum to heat them up.
>make them drink rum to heat them up.
>drink rum to heat them up.
>heat them up.
early civilization was wild
Many doctors in Russia still prescribe a glass of vodka every day "to get the blood flowing".
>The 19th century was "early civilization"
Okay, who's gonna tell him
>no electricity
>no phones
>poc had no rights
>women had no rights
>religious nutjobs controlled society
whats the difference from that to the stone age 1000 years before? nothing.
>>poc had no rights
had no rights
And they were better times for it, lol.
When you think about it, PoC living as a sub-set of anglo culture was always a joke though. Like lol you're basically slaves with more rights and part time terrorists used by the government to control property value. The entire idea of vying for rights in a civilization that you neither control nor are really a part of is insanity. Either conquer a land for yourself or leave.
>alcohol causes blood vessels to dilate
Akshully, alcohol has both constrictive and dilative actions on blood vessels, and these effects are dependent on race, the dose and timing of alcohol consumption.
Deboonkers today will simultaneously claim "it was just one kid who drew a painting"
and "people back then were retarded and didn't know it actually kills you"
>Deboonkers today will simultaneously claim
what? we're not the same person
Hence the plural “deboonkers”
I'm the other guy and I just copypasted text from some website. I don't really care about it.
that makes you even dumber.
ACKshually it depends on the amount of alcohol consumed more than anything else
So a little druk is…le good?
no, a lot druk is le good
Intredasting
Why did 19ty century niggas think brandy was an elixir of life that could cure any injury or ailment?
because it is. take the druk pill
t. friendless basement dweller
>he doesn't keep a bottle of brandy in his cupboard in case of the vapors
Enjoy dying prematurely I guess lmao
Learned men who use the pen have wrote its praises high
O sweet poteen from Ireland green distilled of wheat and rye
But away your pills, it will cure all ill whether pagan or Christian or israelite
So take off your coat and grease your throat with the real old mountain dew!
Next you're telling me dogs never played poker.
I thought the barrels contained food
how do they get to the food?
what's the differences between your "source" and "reality"?
>resulting in blood rushing to your skin
it also rushes to your extremities and prevents your toes from freezing off
>a kid
>a 17-year-old painter
>1820
in the 19th century he was probably married with kids at that age
No, average marriage was in the 20s, same with kids
I remember looking this up specifically back in 2010. There used to be a wiki article on it. Now you're telling me they're trying to say they never did this and it was fabricated by some child?
This is absolutely false, I don't care what anyone says. I know what I read.
I'm beginning to see the value of printed word.
are you familiar with the mandela effect?
>wouldn't be something you'd want
Because dog sled teams are known for their grasp of science and medicine and would never want a stiff drink during a long day of work to make their chest feel warm.
UHM ACKCHYUALLY
>israelites are actually trying to erase history ~~*again*~~ and sand destroy the good boy reputation of St Bernards
Not this time rabbi.
>thing is old and no longer done
>leftist homosexual: I don't know if you know this, but...
According to who, some "erm actually..." nerd homosexual?
It happened.
Alcohol is a poison in normal condition, now imagine the danger of it during hypothermia
Not in my kino.
>burro/donkey wears a battered straw hat
>guilty party whistles nonchalantly
>Pies cool on windowsills
>Bums carry bindles on their shoulders
>Refrigerators are just a metal cabinet with a giant ice cube in it
>Dogcatchers are omnipresent
>fucking quicksand
>black women are always doing other people's laundry
Huh, I didn’t know that bum bag on a stick had an actual term.
Learn something new every day.
And here's some extra depression era bum trivia:
A "bindlestiff" was a bum who stole other bums' bindles rather than make an honest living
Do they become a Bindle Megazord if they steal enough bindles?
Only if they come from bindlestiffs
A bindle also refers to some heroin or cocaine twisted up in the corner of a sandwich baggie. Looks like the rag part of the bum stick.
>man goes broke
>has to wear a barrel held up with suspenders
Today those barrels are way more expensive than clothes.
well he doesn't buy the barrel anyway.
Supply and demand.
The first jak and daxter has a character like this
>character gets drunk like a skunk
>hiccup ensues
>starts to sing about how nobody knows how dry he is
In my later 20s I actually started getting the drunk hiccups.
On my second day of drinking I usually get sneeze fits. Like 15, 20 times. Feels pretty good after.
I hate that I got used to drinking on my way to home after work, it's hard to say no to drink with the PM
>hillbillies have straw hats and straw coming out of their shoes
>Police carry batons and have a giant star on helmets
The fine ladies across this country who leave a pie to cool on their window sill so an old chunk of coal like me can have a hot meal from time to time
>drunk fella has a red nose from all the drinking as he lays with a bottle of wine on a street gutter with the passing cars splashing puddle water on him
>drunk fella has a red nose
It's real though.
Have you never seen an Irishman?
the red nose from drunkenness is a myth, it originated in france from an anti-alcohol campaign in the late 1800s, the campaign basically said you could identify a "good for nothing drunk" by their offputting smell and bright red nose. it somehow remained in the public perception.
it's not a myth, but it comes from very long-term use
>nose not red
Quicksand was suck a prevalent trope in movies that a previously nonexistant fetish was born. When quicksand stopped being such a meme, the fetish mostly disappeared. Seriously, look it up
>Cartoon features cats as main characters
>Obligatory milkman delivering milk in glass bottles
>burro/donkey wears a battered straw hat
And has a wheat straw hanging from its mouth
And a poncho on his back.
This is what they took from you.
>Before eating a prey, the Cat hones its claws with a metal file
>feral cat colony is made of few male cats that do human things
>Stray cats are portrayed as homeless and have broken tin cans at the end of sticks
>cat's claws come out in a hyper exaggerated way as if they need to flick them out
>cat's victim slowly gulps in fear and a large bulge can be seen moving down its throat
>chinaman has a straw hat and buck teeth and bows while he talks
I mean step a few miles out of the major Chinese cities and that's still true
party whistles nonchalantly
wojojoj
>1 can of spinach makes your biceps grow in seconds
>throw something off screen
>cat meows
>throw something off screen
>cat meows
>Car crashes
>character tosses a small item off screen
>a 20 car pileup can be heard
It's more of a screech but it's absolutely kino every single time.
>Pottery breaking
>Cars crashing
>Woman screaming
>Baby crying
>someone does something stupid
>walks backwards out of frame
>running footsteps
>car door
>engine start
>tire screech
I'm 30 and I still laugh whenever I hear this
The exact same cat scream every time
it's like the willem scream for cats
>steak looks like this
supposedly that yellow fat cap is what you get from grass fed cattle
they mostly eat cereals nowadays and thats where the exaggerated marbling comes from
Grain fed (or finished) beef tends to have larger fat caps and more marbling but it's white. The yellow in grass fed comes from beta carotene but they're normally leaner and so smaller fat caps
>get hungry
>drooling gallons
>friend starts talking
>he looks like this
did he died?
I attacked him but he knocked me over the head with a caveman club and birds started spinning around my head
Kino
As a kid I used to mimic these tropes when eating a thick slice of ham.
It does, not in muttmerica though.
>It does, not in muttmerica though.
yeah and our eggs have yellow yolks instead of orange like real eggs, and our butter is whiteish instead of yellow
>the land of confusion
And every roast chicken has these things on
Apparently they're called chop frills
always thought those were little chef hats as a kid they for some reason put on them kek
I'm old and I have seen a steak like that.
>man loses all money
>forced to wear a large barrel instead of clothes
>bottles of alcohol are just marked with an X
>man gets drunk
>hiccups constantly with a red face and X's for eyes
>Someone's butt gets stung
>They jump five feet into the air
>mouse has apartment inside wall
>has mini human furniture
It was made by a tiny John Carpenter.
>character walks casually until they realize they are walking on air and starts falling
>character realizes they're not standing on solid ground
>seems hesitant to look down at the air under them
>finally looks down
>looks back at viewer
>plummets down with their head saying in place and neck stretching
Top kek
Forgot the part where he waves at you with a sad face right before falling down
There was an episode of Tiny Toons where they used this. They made it across a big cliff by just not looking down.
>character is back alive the very next scene
>chicken is a genius entrepreneur, nobody realizes he's a chicken until someone points it out or he pecks at birdseed, lays an egg etc or through no fault of his own gets called a chicken.
>Character falls down cliff
>Goofy scream or imitation
>trash somehow always has a completely intact fish skeleton
>Evil humans are italian
>frog can sing and dance but frustratingly refuses to do so in front of anyone other than the wino bum that found him.
I'll believe it when I see it.
>use psychic powers
>get nose bleed
Vampire will only advance on you if your back is turned.
>midgets half price
>japs free
That cartoon seems to be scrubbed from the internet.
>anime nerd sees pantsu
>jets of blood jet from his nostrils with such force they lift him off his feet
>male dresses as a woman
>everyone laughs
>everyone laughs
roll on snare drum
Curtains
>someone gets shot in the face at point blank range
>his head is covered in soot and spins around
>slowly stops when facing the camera and he blinks a few times
this thread smells of Warner Bros shilling but fuck it
>villain wants to shoot you at point blank with a rifle
>you just put your index finger in the barrel
>gun explodes in the face of the shooter while you remain completely unharmed
>gramps has dentures in a glass on nightstand
>domestic animal accidentally gets hold of them
hahahahaha
the israelites took this from you
>a Leon Schlesinger production
actually the israelites brought it to you
>The greedy israeli pig attempts to trick and subvert the noble Aryan hound
Musta been one of those self-hating Yids
>character gets punched in the eye
>he places a cold raw steak on it
>baseball bat floats patiently in the air as character spits on his hands to improve his grip for the swing he's about to do
>tom throws jerry in the water as bait
>fish pulls out plate, knife, fork and napkin out of nowhere
>Tom gets launched into a telephone pole/jetty pylon/collumn
>knocks out a perfectly cut chunk his exact height
>pole floats for a beat before flattening Tom like an accordion
Its not alcohol its a first aid kit THOUGH
tomato tomato
>character ties handkerchief around neck, eats massive chicken drumstick by just sucking the meat off
>tosses bone casually over shoulder
>this, quickly followed by a bone-in ham
>then a whole bunch of bananas eaten by squeezing them one by one and shooting them into the air in a big arc, falling into their open mouth
>then the french waiter - who has been just as rapidly bringing these courses out, each under a big metal dome lid - gets to the bowl of soup
>Characters looks in and their eyes bug out
>there's a dozen flies doing synchronized swimming to a lively full orchestra waltz while one on the rim playing a tiny classical guitar with 4 of its arms and singing in italian
>closeup on the singing fly, he gets a solo
>the character is so pissed that his hat flips and stream shoots out of his ears
>comical old man rolls-up
>AWOOOOOGAAA
>character has a goofy high pitched speaking voice
>starts singing
>turns into pavarotti
>character goes fishing
>finally, something seems to bite
>it's always an old boot
>he casts again, gets a bite
>"This time it's 24 times heavier than that boot!"
>it's a dozen pairs of boots
>character gets visibly drunk after drinking several bottles of milk
Goofy is a goof. Pluto is a dog.
AH-HYUCK
>character loves eating donuts
>said donuts are strange white balls unlike any donut in real life
Fuck 4Kids not dubbing Pokemon correctly.
I thought it was referring to these things when I was a kid
>character gets hit in the head
>golf ball sized lump appears on top of their head
>They push it back in
>It pops out in a different location
lmfao where the fuck did it come from? it's so funny
Today I shall remind them that Daffy Duck is actually a Martian.
>black guy can't swim
Racist much?
Pretty sure in a lot of early Daffy cartoons he is seen flying though. I think there was pretty good one where Elmer shoots him down. It's one of those animal abilities that just pops up only when it's funny like when Bugs can dig underground at extreme speeds.
>Character has a minor accident
>Ends up in hospital, complete with full body cast
>jawbreaker is 3-4 times the size of adult human head
may as fuckin well be
>it’s neck
Burn.
does alcohol really "warm you up"?
>hoooooonk mi mi mi mi mi
>character winds up punch by spinning their arm around
>feet leave the ground as the punch connects
>Character gets hit by a punch with tremendous force
>Feet stay in place while the rest of the body is launched backwards
>Character "investigates" by staring at the floor through a magnifying glass
>character paints a black circle on the side of a cliff
>other character runs straight into it and instead of smashing into a wall gets flattened by a locomotive chugging at full speed out of the painted circle
>main character cross dresses for the villain at the cabaret
>stretches his legs out from behind the curtain
>seductivly walks on stage with his face behind a fan
>pulls the villain towards
>hits him with a hammer
I love all of these.
>Attractive female walks by
>Eyes pop out of their sockets and revert to their natural heart-shaped state.
>And they make a car horn noise
AWOOOOOGA
>goats eat tin cans, and practically anything else
>Drunk people hiccup
I understand that it's something that really happens because alcohol dehydrates you, but it's weird how reliably it happens in old cartoons whereas I can't think of a single instance of it happening in live fiction.
I always get hiccups when I'm drinking. Even from drinking a lot of water. And I do think it's common part of exaggerated/comical way of acting drunk.
They don’t do it as exaggerated as cartoons do
If I have a bunch of beers pretty quick it's a 50/50 if I'll hiccup or not
>character goes to the opera
>Figarofigarofigarofigarofigaro
>obese woman with blonde braids and a viking helmet with large horns
kino
>Character falls from a cliff
>Convenient branch grows out from said cliff for him to latch onto
If only I worked at ACME CORP and just spent all day making weirdly specific gadgets for cartoon characters to commit acts of physical violence against each other with
>character goes to bed in pyjama hat
It's very comfortable.
>winter night time
>leave window open for that fresh, crispy cold air full of oxygen
>get into the thick blankets and put on my night cap
>pull it over my ears and eyes
>sleep like a rock for 12 hours
>feather floats up and down above the character's nose all night while he sleeps
>Character goes on a rant just before the cartoon ends
>Fade-to-black cuts them off
>Character opens the screen back up to get a last word in
>character gets shot/hit in the teeth
>teeth break and fall making glass noises
>Characters get into a fight
>Cloud of dust appears with different body parts popping in and out
>Fight ends
>Characters are immediately covered with band-aids and casts and an ice bag on their head
>*hawk screech*
>>St Bernard has alcohol under it's neck
I will now watch your movie
>Baby somehow gets out of the house
>Parents/Babysitter completely oblivious to this
>Its up to the family pet to save it
>Always ends up at a construction site with I beams
>Pet saves the baby but gets reprimanded for some reason
So I assume beside the baby booming there were dead babies everywhere during the same period.
>baby grows up
>starts sleep walking
>same damn thing happens
All these "tropes" and storytelling devices are great & concise, they tell something or sets the tone in one frame/second.
>tropes
Cliche
Trope is a homosexual internet word that people have misusing for over a decade.
Were those hats ever a thing or is just a cartoon thing?
>Silly character wears one of those
>Gets serious and spins the propeller on the hat which makes him fly to save the day
Apparently they were quite common, but they started to fade in popularity when they became more and more associated with mental tardiness
>he never wore a propeller hat
>he never wore suspenders holding up gray shorts
>he never had a blue-and-white striped shirt
>he was never morbidly obese as a 10 year old
>he never constantly held a lollipop
>he never had big, red cheeks and a bright smile
>Character shoots at scary thing
>As the bullet approaches the target, it also gets scared and turns around
Can't believe they'd make a Holocaust reference in a cartoon
>character is drinking from a bottle and drunkenly singing "OH DANNY BOOPOY, THE PIPES THE PIPES ARE - *hiccup* - CAAAAAALLIIIIIING"
>wacky happening passes by them
>character rubs eyes, looks at the bottle, then chucks it over their shoulder, looks directly at the camera, and says "Never again!"
Cartoon food looks delicious - also, you can put it over your black eye if you get hurt.
>Jerry salivating over meat.
Mice are omnivores. They will eat anything and everything
>also, you can put it over your black eye if you get hurt.
People do that irl too.
>Character gets angry
>Pulls their cap over their entire body
>"RASAFRASASUNNAWHYIOUGHTA!"
>character is known for usually silent
>only screams and yelps
>suddenly talk with the most deep echoed voice imaginable
DOOON'T YOU BELIEVE IT
>that one chinese jingle plays everytime someone got their head smacked with a thin plate
>guy flirt with a girl
>kiss her hand, arm, shoulder then her cheek
>hey what's that smell?
>YAAAAAHOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW
>counting banknotes
>Character is on a stage
>A very long cane come out and drag them away by the throat
It's called a shepherd's crook you retard
If you say so, gramps
>he didn't watch Showtime at the Apollo
just look at all of those barrels!
>Blunderbuss
>character attempts suicide after a slight inconvenience
Haha imagine
I want to fuck that dinosaur
so satisfying
that and tree stars
>makes you want to eat grass and believe it would be good
>when it has pubes
>roll perfect cig using one hand and mouse
>light cig by shooting it
>lower lip extends to catch it
>pull entire cig in one draw
>smoke spells word
>Dis nigga game is so cold
>scraggly band of the main characters
>one inevitably plays a washtub bass
>city pays you to protect a beat
>your main concern is some cats in a fucking alley
ACAB
Cringe
>characters start banging on random shit they find lying around
>it actually sounds like music
>second breed to hurt hurt most humans after pitbulls
>character gets bored waiting for something
>they rapidly age and grow a white beard
oh hell yea
feet too long. would not fuck.
>See attractive woman out in public dressed provocatively
>Cartoon heart pops in and out of my chest as I begin involuntarily stomping my foot and whistling
>Anvil falls on characters head
>Head and square-shaped
>Rest of body is ok
>Character puts finger in his mouth and blows it
>Head inflates and goes back to normal
>grandma starts raping faster than eminem
damn what cartoons you watching?
>Children's film ends
>"Who let the dogs out" song starts playing
>Dog starts breakdancing
>ugly kid is poor and brown
>rich kid is handsome and blonde
>ugly kid is good and everyone loves him
>rich kid is mean and is hated by everyone, specially his father
Which one were you? I was poor but also hated by everyone, specially my father, haha.
>character is holding something
>another character switches it to a dynamite stick
>character doesnt notice until it's too late
this is how i want to die
alternatively this happens to me
Such a good alternative of this in Ed Edd n Eddy. The Ed’s get a jawbreaker in one of the later seasons and Eddy is holding in up and Ed immediately tries to suck it out of his hand but at the last second Eddy switches hands and is holding a skunk and Ed slurps it up and his eyes start watering and green skunk stink is coming out of his ears.
Ahaha
The old switcheroo
>character is comfortably in bed on his side with his night cap on just about to fall asleep
>alley cats start screeching, forcing him to get up and start throwing shit at them
>nothing ever hits
blessed thread
for me it's bulls and rhinos doing that thing where they scrape the ground before charging
>innocent patron trying to squirt ketchup on a hotdog at the bullfight
>squirts it all over himself
pretty sure that's real and not only in cartoons kek
>guy in saloon spits tobacco juice
>hits spittoon with a loud ring
>bonus points if he's outside where there's no spittoon but there's a ring anyway
>double bonus points if he's grasshopper.
>if he's outside where there's no spittoon but there's a ring anyway
KEK
>gunshot in an open field in the old west and not aimed at the ground
>ricochet sounds anyway right after the shot is taken
>metal object is touched
>*ssssshhhhhrrriiiiinngg*
looking after my nephew recently and the cartoons he watches are absolutely devoid of the SOVL ITT
it's actually so brain-dead to the point of being kinda unnerving
you now remember the beethoven movies
What a le epic reddit thread
>tunnel is painted on a concrete wall
>protagonist runs through it
>villain crashes into it
holy shit no way hahahaha
The ones who fucking painted that there are dumber than the fucking driver wtf?
>Character dies
>Eyes turn into Xs
That one scene from Fantastic Mr. Fox comes to mind.