The prequels

How would you fix them?

  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No CG.
    Re-Write most of the Script.

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Edit some dialogue and improve the delivery of some of the actors.

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    bigger tits with no bras, padme looks like a kid not a woman
    no walking slowly talking in vast green-screen spaces
    no fan service shit like return of the two droids etc
    no massive h/w stars like sam jackson and dooku actor
    more techno army
    more grevious
    more watto
    more sexy asses
    more war story/less politics
    more sith history, especially plagueis

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    where's that edit of someone editing all 3 down into one film?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This. One movie was enough to cover Vader's arc. Maybe...two, MAYBE! Forcing a trilogy was dishonest, greedy and lame

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Pathetic

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I'd never thought of this, but you're right. Filler and ponderous sidequests serving B plot no one is invested in is one of the PT's biggest problems. If you condensed it to one straightforward Vader origin film it would force George to cut out a lot of the crap. Even with his infamous lack of subtlety if he didn't have the runtime he would have to figure out ways to represent stuff like the trade war and the origins of the clone army without wasting time on a bunch of tangents involving characters he just made up to populate his fantasy world. People always talk about him getting too much freedom with the PT, and the runtime of three whole movies is what gave it to him. Even George "let me interrupt this Darth Vader film to introduce a race of frog people I daydream about" Lucas would have to cut the crap and tell the actual story if he didn't have so much time to play with. It's the simplest fix.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No rewrite needed. They're perfect the way they are.

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Clone wars start in TPM and the gap between it and AOTC is greatly reduced. Anakin starts out as a teenager, at least as old as Padme, maybe as old as Luke was in ANH. Maul takes the place of Dooku. Grievous is killed on board the ship at the start of RotS and Obi-Wan goes to confront Maul instead.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Make them r rated.

      > Anakin starts out as a teenager,
      This is good.
      .
      Also no ot planets. We would spend zero time on Tatooine, shit is played after OT.
      No fucking midicorlertians, no America diners,

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >No fucking midicorlertians
        why not?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It ruins the nature of the force.
          >lumaniois beings are we, not this crude matter.
          Saying you can measure potential force power by taking a blood sample is fucking retarded reductionism

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You don't think space aged monks would have investigated how their powers work? Explaining shit to an uneducated farm boy in simple terms doesn't change anything.

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    more count poopoo

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Literally just needed a better director. The actors and the overall plot was fine.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      George is a good director.

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Jar Jar gone
    Midichlorians gone
    Movie 1: Qui-gon receives or discovers a prophecy and disputes its meaning with the Jedi Council. The Council asks him to go on a different mission, following reports of Sith activity. In fact, the Sith is Darth Maul, who is one step ahead and trying to capture young Anakin.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Jar Jar gone
      >Midichlorians gone
      Opinion discarded

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        What's it like being a Millennial virgin? Most people from your generation have had sex. Do you get groceries delivered, or do you shop at night when there's less people around?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I've been married for 11 years. Can you even justify your problem with jar jar or midi-chlorians or are you just regurgitating stuff you've heard?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You've literally never made eye contact with an adult in over a decade.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You've got nothing anon, you can't even justify the opinions you copied off some youtube video.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >the opinions you copied off some youtube video.
                That is what we call "projection". The fact that you're incapable of thinking in any other terms than this speaks volumes about yourself more than anyone else.

                I decided The Phantom Menace was a giant turd the day I watched it when it was released in theaters. Youtube did not exist. But YOU are so accustomed to getting your opinions from third parties, you can't imagine anyone else actually thinking for themselves.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I thought they were great from when they came out, we're allowed to have different opinions anon, at least i can justify mine, while you have proven unable to do so.

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    More like how would you fix the sequels

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Even accounting for inflation tfa cost almost twice what rots cost. They should have given that budget to George, let him make what he wanted, he would have pushed the technology and cinema to places we can't imagine.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I swear Disney is lazy as shit

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >he would have pushed the technology and cinema to places we can't imagine.
        How do you figure? His last Star Wars films were cinematic disasters. The CG looked godawful.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          They were all financially successful, they were popular enough to spawn, books, games, and all sorts of popular media spin-off content. Every single star wars movie was right on the cutting edge of movie technology, if not developing new techniques and processes to achieve what George wanted and everyone single one looked fantastic when it came out. You can argue that he pushed too far too fast in some places but I don't hold that against him, they were basically experimental films and each pushed was was possible forward with each entry.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Every single star wars movie was right on the cutting edge of movie technology
            Jurassic Park was 1993. The Phantom Menace was 1999. In 6 years (an ETERNITY for technological development at that time), they went backwards and made movies that looked shitter than what already existed.

            I don't think you could be more full of shit. The movies you grew up with were turds. I'm sorry you have so little personality to fall back on you can't abide by the media you devoted yourself to getting called out.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I saw jurassic lark in the cinema as well. It also looked fantastic for its time and as with star wars some parts hold up really well and some don't, everyone things of the integration of the t rex puppet with the cgi in the scene where it attacks in the rain and that still looks good but the first time we see the brachiosaurus doesn't really hold up today, neither does the herd of gallimimus or the raptors in the kitchen. It's still a great movie and was cutting edge for its time but that's the truth.

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Production:
    -George writes, other people revise, direct, edit
    -Drastically reduce CG, stick with Jim Henson designs

    Anakin/story arc:
    -No child Anakin
    -Anakin is a noble warrior, closer in age to Obi-Wan
    -Find young Sebastian Shaw lookalike, see pic related
    -No dull, dry "Galactic Senate" and Bush-esque power takeover. This is a Sword'n'Sorcery Space Fantasy movie. Just start with the Empire and Emperor, they've always been there, but true motives hidden behind the mask
    -Anakin and Obi-Wan are Jedi Knights in service of the empire, trusted friends and comrades, but begin to have ideological differences
    -Anakin wants power to maintain order and of his own volition begins to slip to the dark side
    -No child predator Palpatine tricking Anakin with stories about fucking the universe with his hatesperm
    -No petty banter/teen angst between Obi and Anakin; they are grown men, honed warriors, and their mutual respect and irreconcilable differences are serious

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Jedi:
      -No weird celibate cult shit
      -Jedi are more modeled after the cinematic idea of ronin from Japanese samurai movies; they are roaming warriors, often sellswords, some in service of local kingdoms or retainers to their sworn lords, others wandering problem-solvers, heroes, or mercenaries, but generally regarded with a healthy dose of respect and caution wherever they go
      -Each Jedi visually distinct, with their own attitude, personality, morality, and fighting style. Many ways to use the Force. Not all lightsabers!
      -Some stern monastic jedi, but also flamboyant jedi, trickster jedi, battle-maniac types, etc
      -No ridiculous impotent "Jedi council" where they sit around in beige/brown Tattooine robes and say nonsensical garbage about "bringing balance to the Force"
      -Light and Dark sides not so binary; it's a big, wild galaxy. Need not be "you're either a Jedi or a nasty old SITH!" But those who hold to their ideals are stronger.
      -Yoda remains the wise old asian mystic/master/pacifist on the mountain type. No "whipping out his little laser sword and going to town." Luminous beings are we.

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I wouldn't because they were great as they are and special movies we'll never see the likes of again. have a nice day gay mouse shill

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Are you on drugs? The prequels are fucking terrible, shitty movies.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I'm sorry you can't appreciate them.i understand they're not to everyone's taste but George made what he wanted and they're unique, fun, interesting movies. Everything is cookie cutter shit, there's no pushing boundaries or striving for creativity. They aren't perfect but is? I'll always appreciate them.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >George made what he wanted and they're unique, fun, interesting movies
          Oh lord no. They're giant turds. There's nothing "fun" about the Phantom Menace or the other two stinkers that followed if you grew up watching the original trilogy. They're pure dreck.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            The OT is boring

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >some of the most cherished films ever made that inspired entire generations
              >kicked off thousands of copycats across decades
              >spawned the entire Star Wars multimedia empire and fandom, which simply would not exist if the films had not been as beloved and successful as they were
              >"t-they're boring"
              At least try to make an argument that doesn't make you look like a weak, resentful child.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I did grow up watching the original trilogy and I still loved the prequels.

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >trannies are still seething over prequels
    Just let it go, it's been 17 years already.

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >the pt was cutting edge
    lmfao they look like shit

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >lmao I wasn't even born when it came out

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Film the enitre thing in japanese and refuse to explain why

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Don't try it

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Make AotC better, especially the Anakin and Padme romance. Make the Geonosis Kenobi rescue scene less shit and have a couple scenes with more clone development and all 3 would be perfect. Last thought would be removing any midichlorian dialogue.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      why wouldn't a relationship between 2 virgins, one raised by monks the other a life of training for/service since she was a kid be awkward?

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I wouldn't cause they're perfect and if you disagree you're a gay reddit gay.

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Nude birthing scene Natalie Portman
    >Nude conception scene Natalie Portman
    >More ki adi mundi
    >Qui gon doesn't fully die but is near fatally wounded and remains an advisor to the council, but not an active Jedi.
    >Anakin only becomes Darth Vader when he finds out the father of his children isn't himself but a twi'lek
    >Luke and Leia are what happened when Vader took measures to genetically modify the growing foetuses so as to not have them turn out blue and tail headed
    >He's so disgusted that he's finally convinced to help Palpatine start the new republic
    >So mad at his woman that he purges coruscant and half the galaxy
    >Finds out she died at childbirth anyway
    >Purges another half of the galaxy

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Episode 1
    -No Darth Sidious. Darth Maul is presented as the mastermind behind the Trade Federation conspiracy.
    -Anakin is older, same age or a year younger than Padme. He's a pickpocket/street rat, not a slave. Watto is Anakin's fence and also his negative male role-model, foreshadowing the relationship he'll develop with Palpatine in the future.
    -No prophecy, no immaculate conception, Anakin is not the chosen one, he's someone very strong with the Force that was born on the wrong planet.
    -Qui-gon has a vision of events that occur in the following movies. He concludes that best way to prevent this (the future is always in motion) is to train Anakin and set him on the straight and narrow.
    -Darth Maul escapes to fight another day.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Episode 2
      -Because Maul wasn't wasted in the first movie, Count Dooku is no longer necessary (sorry)
      -Padme is immediately attracted to Anakin who rather than a hormonal teenager is a mature man who's subdued demeanor cannot mask his animal magnetism. Anakin is basically Ryan Gosling.
      -Anakin still slaughters the Tuskans after his mother is killed, however he keeps it a secret from Padme.
      -Bring in General Grievous early with a body more in line with normal human proportions (the Episode 3 body is an upgrade.)
      -Final fight is a 2v2 between Obi-Wan/Anakin and Maul/Grievous. Maul takes Anakin's arm. Obi-Wan pushes Grievous off a balcony. Obi-Wan defeats Maul and has him on the ground, but Maul uses Force Lighting to throw Obi-Wan away and flee once again (no Yoda fight yet)

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Episode 3
        -Anticlimactic Maul fight where he gets his ass kicked 2v1. Obi-Wan takes his hands and Anakin takes his head.
        -Yoda stays on Coruscant. Obi-Wan tracks down Grievous on Kashyyyk.
        -After his betrayal, Anakin's first mission for Palpatine is to assassinate the Separatist leaders. He gets to them before Obi-Wan can.
        -Next Palpatine wants Anakin to kill the penis-head Jedi master because he suggested a coup. Cut the head off the serpent and prevent a 2nd civil war.
        -Palpatine orders the clones to kill Obi-Wan, but he escapes with help from the Wookies.
        -Yoda confronts Palpatine. They're both fucked up by the fight. Yoda escapes back to the temple wounded. Palpatine call and emergency senate meeting and declares war on the Jedi.
        -Battle at the temple. Outnumbered Jedi hold off the clone army while students and non-combatants escape in evacuation ships.
        -Anakin comes home to find everything gone to shit. Palpatine orders Anakin to track down and kill the students, but he refuses. Palpatine uses every abusive manipulative trick to break down Anakin until he agrees. Before leaving he goes to see Padme and she tries to convince Anakin that they should just run away and disappear. He tells her to trust him and after this last mission everything will be fine.
        -Obi-Wan finds out Darth Vader is heading to Mustafar. He doesn't know who Darth Vader is, but does know Mustafar is host of a secret Jedi enclave that's designated as an emergency shelter for students.
        -He's too late. Anakin slaughters the children. Obi-Wan is enraged to find out Darth Vader is Anakin and tells Padme of all the horrible things he's done. They fight and Obi-Wan is losing at first because he's to angry to focus. Halfway through he lets go of his anger and centers himself which allows him to beat Anakin.
        -Final scene is on Alderaan. Obi-Wan leaves for Tatooine and Padme sends Luke with him.

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Not have a 10 year time skip, have Hayden playing Anakin from the beginning, you can show young Anakin with his mother for a 10 minute flashback or prologue. Show Anakin more emotional in TPM, a young overtly cocky podracer but underneath a very angry and insecure person. Have at least one scene with Anakin and Palpatine together in Attack of the Clones.
    I would say use better cgi techniques like nowadays using standins and such but thats complete hindsight.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Show Anakin more emotional in TPM, a young overtly cocky podracer but underneath a very angry and insecure person
      >missing the point this badly.
      I'm getting second hand embarrassment from your post.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah I know "yippee!" is supposed to be child Anakin being emotional but it doesn't actually come off like that because the kid couldn't act for shit. I mean we need to actually an emotional Anakin so when AotC rolls around him acting stoic because of the jedi training/indoctrination is more of a shock.

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    6 hours of Natalie Portman and Kiera Knightley having sex with me and each other.

  23. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    honestly too much for me to list, but the main two things i'd have done differently is anakin's turn to the dark side in ep3, and speaking broadly across the whole trilogy i'd like for the reveal of palpatine as sidious to be much more of a surprise. throw in a bunch of red herrings and the like.

  24. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    1 movie
    adult darth vader, already married

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You could do an opening prologue like The Last Crusade to cover child Anakin. 10-15 minutes to advance his story as much the entire first movie did.

  25. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Unironicly more jar jar. The original plan of darth jar jar was kino

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This moron gets it.

      I would pay good money to see evil Jar Jar. To me it looks like the character was designed for an epic evil "transformation" where the heroes wind up in the dimly-lit throne room expecting to find the final boss and Jar Jar starts talking and goes from unintelligible tard-talk to sinister Sith voice in 2.5 seconds.

      Just imagine his yellow eyes frowning, his toothy grin taking on a whole new meaning, and his (clawed) ears lifting up behind his head like the hood of a cobra. You could give kids nightmares with that shit.

      I didn't even notice the claws on the ears until someone suggested Darth Jar Jar. Then it made a lot of sense. I would have forgiven so many sins in these films if that's how it ended.

  26. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I wouldn’t. I would listen to what they had to say. And that’s what no one did.

  27. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The prequels are fascinating because despite all that's wrong with them. There's still something there that is kind of great and overcomes all the glaringly bad stuff.

    Personally, I think we need a special edition of the prequels. Go back and fix bad compositing, and redo some of the dated CGI. Try and keep as much of the model work as possible.

    Get a better edit of the films.

    I also think it'd be interesting to actually finish the special edition of the originals. One of the strange parts of it is how randomly some stuff fixed was, while leaving some equally bad stuff in.

  28. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I can't, they're already perfect

  29. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    First movie:
    >Don't start with fucking kid
    >Start with totally good guy, non-Jedi, 'great pilot' Hayden Christensen Anakin, idealistic young man, full of piss and vinegar.
    >Runs into Obi-Wan while they are on different pre-Clone War missions.
    >In getting out of their situation and accomplishing their respective missions, they save each other's lives and become great friends
    >Buddy dynamic where Obi-Wan is the wise, conservative straight man who wants to do shit mostly non-violently, and Anakin is the maverick hot-shot taking absurd risks, yet shockingly succeeding
    >Obi-Wan is giving Anakin side-eye the whole time, but truly realises Anakin's Force potential power level when he witnesses the shit he does in the final escape, (not because of measuring boring retardo midichlorians).
    >Concerned about information discovered on their mission, indicating a coming Galactic War, Obi-Wan suggests to Anakin that he train him in the ways of the Force even though he's a little old to start, (you don't need to be a foetus to start Jedi training though - he's the same age as Luke, which is considered a little dangerous because it's over the normally considered safe age by a few years - not unheard of though).
    >Anakin seems to scoff at the idea, content to be a pilot, any yet he witnessed the power that Obi-Wan exhibited during their mission and looking down at his hand, seriously considers it with an ambiguously serious/semi-evil expression

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Second movie:
      >Anakin has either already taken Obi-Wan up on the offer and has been training a while, or they wind up working together again, and
      spend the first half of the movie on a mission, and Obi-Wan shows Anakin some Jedi tricks, (which the Jedi Council would not approve of), which makes Anakin want to take Obi-Wan up on the offer to train as a Jedi officially.
      >Perhaps also motivated by an intervening tragic event in his life also, between movies, that perhaps Obi-Wan doesn't know about.
      >They work together the second half of the movie with Anakin's power growing rapidly to the shock and awe of Obi-Wan.
      >Just small indications of his true power level at first, and only hints of his Dark Side motivated by anger tendencies.
      >But they prevail and save the day together and are still good friends
      >Obi-Wan is a little concerned at times, but ultimately trusts in the goodness of his friend.

      Third film.
      >Time has passed
      >Obi-Wan and Anakin have been working together, and Anakin's skillz are now starting to well and truly exceed Obi-Wan's.
      >Anakin is even more brash, which Obi-Wan admonishes, but they are a great team and kicking arse all over the galaxy.
      >They are on their hardest mission ever and almost get killed
      >Obi-Wan is about to die
      >In desperation Anakin uses anger to access maximum power and saves him, but it's the beginning of the end
      >The rest of the movie he is increasingly seduced by the Dark Side of the Force - overtly.
      >Obi-Wan tries to save his friend's soul just as Luke tried, but ultimately fails.
      >They fight.
      >Anakin falls into a volcano or whatever.

      >Emperor Phantom Menace plan in background the whole time more or less.
      >Palpatine senses epic Dark Side energy and finds Anakin all fucked up and puts him in suit, takes him under his wing, etc.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You kind of left out him having kids aspect...

      I think the story that George was telling needed the kid stuff. I think he ran into the problem the sequels did, where it didn't set up anything.

      Although that could have been done by time jumping Anakin in the first film. To have the connection to saving your family that George wanted to tell.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Kids aspect is the same thing that kids liked about the originals, they dynamic between the ADULT characters. Han being a brash badass, Luke being an idealistic n00b, and the old man being all wise and shit. It's like poetry - it rhymes.

        You could put in new droids or whatever. Fans would get a bigger kick out of them passing 3PO in a random hallway than they ever got out of that fucking kid building him, or spinning because that's a good trick.

  30. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You don't.

    They were fucking great and I'm sick of doomers trying 'fix' shit.

    Just fuck off and go and watch Lindsey Ellis.

  31. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    for me it's droids. george wanted to make a serious movie about politics but also didn't want kids see men dying for their cause so he added these stupid clankers. I say fuck half-measures. make them real people (or aliens for that matter), make them struggle, show the conflict.

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