>TROLL IN THE DUNGEON
Oh fuck oh shit!
TRANNY IN THE WOMENS BATHROOM
>CHUD!!!! WITH AN ASSAULT RIFLE
Zoinks, like we got to get out of here
We need to stop the proliferation of assault wands. 95% of dark wizards in Britain purchased their wands from Ollivander's. We need common sense background checks and age requirements on wands.
Why does anyone need a wand with a skeleton carved into it?
Skeleton wands might look scarier but they’re not any more dangerous than normal wands. We need to get the wands out of the hands of dangerous wizards
Lets take a look at some democrat wands. My God...
should have just been a black dildo
patrol in the dungeon almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter
What an amazing Coincidence Professor Quirrel.
You're own contribution to the security of the philosopher's stone was also a troll, and you just so happened to be the first witness to the presence of a separate troll which somehow infiltrated the most magically secure facility in the world. Something so outrageous that it would be impossible without being part of a wizard's plot.
Well no matter.
>is a Squirrelly fellow
>call him Quirrel
Bravo, Mrs. Rowling. Also, when he fainted in this scene did no one take off his turban and find voldemort's weird face on the back of his head?
>off his turban
They were respectful toward his religion
Plus it probably smelled under there
Why does a school have a dungeon?
My school had an air-raid shelter
Hogwarts is one of the only two places that matter in the Wizarding World (the other being the Ministry) so you can add anything you want to it and excuse it by saying it's part of wizard history or something.
Fuck you leatherman
unironically to lock away all the slytherins
Is that Alf Whatshisname from Home & Away?!
That Troll was a tranny
he was in the womans bathrom
>he said calmly
>The IRS is here! They're asking for the comptroller to surrender the records for the last six years of itemized deductions!
>TOMORROW IS CHILI DAY AND THE TOILET PAPER IS ON BACK-ORDER!
Isn't that a logical place for a troll?
No. The troll in question works in the Bursar's Office. Apparently it was trying to lay off work.
>Mr. Bloodgore! I need those TPS reports by three! New students arrive at four!
Unsuccessful troll is unsuccessful.
>Bloodgore eventually became second assistant bursar for Hogwarts... He hated his new job and new responsibilities even more. He longed for a simpler life in the school's dungeon where he grew up.
SHUT UP MR. BLANKY!
Does only Gryffindor have the anti-rape stairs on the female dorm rooms?
They probably all do, or at least some form of anti-male protection if not specifically the stair thing.
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