>watching movie with parents. >sex scene. >awkward silence as they're reminded I haven't done it yet

>watching movie with parents
>sex scene
>awkward silence as they're reminded I haven't done it yet
>mom shoots a sympathetic you'll find someone one day look

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    This didn't happen.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Hello, I am OP's mother, and can confirm this did happen.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I remember being a very small kid and my mom, aunts, and their friends joking that I'll be a "lady killer". I was supposed to be so handsome. Mom would have trouble keeping all the girls away

    🙁

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      same, funny how that turned out

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      the worst part is that I turned out handsome enough just so mentally ill and autistic I'm basically a shut in.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Literally did modeling and small acting gigs
        >Permavirgin
        Seeing girls actively approach you and get visibly turned off as you speak is fricking soulcrushing

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          exactly. or girls stare at you but you pussy out and do nothing and regrets keep pilling up

          Just hang out in bars by the nearest university or collage and pretend that you're doing a philosphy degree and quiet because you are always deep in thought. So long as you are genuinely handsome there are a lot of female students into that sort of thing. If you are older than the average student say it is a Phd. Should you get serious and want a girl for more than just a few pumps then release say you have quit your course as there was "nothing more they could teach you" (the more pretentious and narcissistic you make it sound the better).

          I'm not going to go alone to a bar full of attractive women if I'm afraid to go buy grocieries. Also I live with my parents and dont have social media

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Seeing girls actively approach you and get visibly turned off as you speak is fricking soulcrushing
          all I was ever told when I was younger was that I would learn the gift of the gab through experience, but after experiencing hundreds of awkward embarrassing suicide-inducing interactions I haven't learned shit

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah, this is when I stopped dating. Religion kept telling me I'd find "the one" but it was glaringly apparent that I might suicide before I'd did. Sorry, Jesus. I value this life.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I know the feel. Before being a shutin I went through so many of this, the look of pure disappointment and confusion as they realize that you're an autistic weirdo unable to communicate properly, damn. Sometimes they had this disgusted and terrified look on their face, you could feel all the regret they had for approaching me because i'm slightly handsome. The smartest girls were just using me as a stand-in when they were lonely, frick them.

          Yeah, this is when I stopped dating. Religion kept telling me I'd find "the one" but it was glaringly apparent that I might suicide before I'd did. Sorry, Jesus. I value this life.

          Same as you kek, it really mess with your brain.
          When I almost killed myself on pure impulse without being able to control anything I stopped trying. Being a shutin is comfy.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Just hang out in bars by the nearest university or collage and pretend that you're doing a philosphy degree and quiet because you are always deep in thought. So long as you are genuinely handsome there are a lot of female students into that sort of thing. If you are older than the average student say it is a Phd. Should you get serious and want a girl for more than just a few pumps then release say you have quit your course as there was "nothing more they could teach you" (the more pretentious and narcissistic you make it sound the better).

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >turn out handsome
        >lift weights
        >bros mirin’ at the gym
        >women mirin in public
        >turn out not autistic or socially inept
        >but high IQ 130+
        Socialising is super easy for me, when I want to do it. I went out NYE and just went from bar to bar meeting and drinking with randoms. It was fun. But honestly not something i can do very often because I cant connect with people on a level deeper than a couple hours of drinking. When it gets deeper, people find my intelligence either confronting or disturbing i cant figure out which

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        same, uggos won't ever know this pain, they at least have some excuse. I can't blame anyone, but myself

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      when i was a kid everybody used to praise me for how smart i was and how far i was gonna go
      instead i'm an alcoholic virgin neet watching road house for the 50th time

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      same.
      puberty fricked my looks.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      you too huh?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I was teased about my first crush when I was 6. Never talked to family about girls again.
      Bigger problem was I grew up in an all white area so I didn't know they were all 10s until I'd moved and saw how bad things really were. I haven't even seen someone I would call attractive in a decade.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Same here, I am very handsome imo of course but still socially inept

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Same here. Have had a few girls crush on me but I always turn into a moron when I
        actually talk to them.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          My problem is that I never see when a girl is making a move so they realise I'm dumb with low xp and they lose interest immediately.
          Also in their head they see it as a rejection, that's why they despise you after that

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            For me it's being way too afraid of a small mistake, making something i perceive as a slip up , then panicking and spilling my spaghetti or trying to pretend I wasn't coming onto her because I know I blew it. And yes I know that only makes it worse.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >trying to pretend I wasn't coming onto her because I know I blew it
              I feel you there, bro. I hate when I must to tell people "I didn't liked the woman that much anyway" because I rejected her herby accident

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >then panicking and spilling my spaghetti or trying to pretend I wasn't coming onto her because I know I blew it
              For me it was
              >Coworker
              >It's her last day
              >ask her out to a movie
              >She gladly accepts
              >next day I message her
              >she takes 3 days to respond
              >Suddenly acts all b***hy like she's annoyed by me
              >"Just as friends right? Because I already have a boyfriend" (she was clearly single)
              >(Why the frick would you go out with a dude that likes you when you have aboyfriend?)
              >"Yeah, sure as friends, I wasn't trying anything"
              >I ditch her
              Guess what? she didn't have a boyfriend and from what I heard she's been 2 years single since I asked her out

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Don't worry about that c**t

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I had this too. It was wrong to convince young boys dating would be easy for them especially leading up to the 21st century

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      not too late to become another kind of lady killer

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Frick your mom

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Worked for Chris-Chan. Even he lost his virginity.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How old are you in this greentext?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Only 30, basically still a teenager, I still have time

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >watching movie with parents
    >sex scene
    >they're visibly intrigued and thrilled

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >be me
    >circumcised for health reasons
    >watching movie with mother
    >character is revealed to be circumcised
    >mother shoots me a look
    >"you know, women cum a lot easier than what people think"

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This needs to be impressed upon young boys so they have a chance before girls their age are taught to be prostitutes.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      wdsmbt?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      [...]

      Stick to /misc/ you fricking homosexual.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Shut the frick up you dirty israelite

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I'm 25 years old and a virgin.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >had loads of opportunities at school with girls, don't know why they just seemed to like me
    >would deliberately sit next to me in classes
    >pretend they don't know answers to questions so I would help them
    >even say things if they'd maybe given up that their friends really liked me
    >instead because I was autistically obsessed with just doing my work and getting good grades and go home I just ignored them point blank some times or gave them binary answers like yes/no
    >eventually they would all just give up and sit somewhere else with their own friends
    >one really mental emo girl who cuts herself starts doing the same thing one day
    >asks me for bus money because she lost hers
    >say yeah if you let me suck your breasts
    >after school we go hide behind some bushes and she takes her top off and I start sucking and even get my fingers stinky
    >mfw my first sexual experience was sexual for a £1.20 bus fare when I was 14 with someone that was clearly insane

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Did you ever do anything sexual after that?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        no I applied the same autistic mentality to her as I did everyone else after that. she kept sitting next to me thinking we'd get closer but eventually she just went and sat at the back with the other girls and I kept my cool table where I sat alone doing my work and getting good grades. I didn't even act like that out of malice, I just genuinely wanted to be left on my own so I could do my work instead.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Based. I have a very similar story where the 'weird girl' in class did the same thing to me. She sat next to me, clung onto me on recess and shit but I was autismo. I magically found the balls to make out with her once and touch her booba but I've done nothing since.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            my homie. I did manage to finish school with aced results and got a good job as well so I'm glad I spent my time being autistic instead of pursuing all the slags. I've seen a few of them since walking around in town and a lot of them have turned fat and are pushing baby prams around (no partner in sight).

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It goes, it goes, it goes

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >mom shoots a sympathetic you'll find someone one day look

    She lies to you.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Just have sex with your mother, bro. It's not hard. If I can do it, you can do it too.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Its even more akward when you are over 30.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >not lying to mom and dad
    Just lie to them?

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >watching movie with parents
    >they get horny and start fricking in front of you

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I'm fairly certain that without dumb '80s sex scenes, is never have been born

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How does she know you've never had sex?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      everyone knows

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >family reunion
    >to word "masturbation" comes out mid conversation
    >moms looks at you

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Just frick a prostitute and get over it

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I have a friend that's 380lbs with a wife and kids.
    most of you b***hing haven't tried and think pussy is going to fall into your lap.

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >watching movie with parents
    >gay scene comes on
    >they both look at me
    It’s over bros

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      you just have to explain to them that when you were rubbing your action man toys together and moaning when you were 4, it was because they were fighting and all their clothes had been stolen from them

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      You shouldn't have showed them your Ricardo collection anon

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    i was in like third grade and they had already tried to loosen it surgicially earlier

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >watch Lars and the real girl with parents
    >Lars age and inability to move on with life is brought up in the movie
    >realize I'm the same age as Lars and haven't got out the house in 2 months
    >dad is actually confused whether Lars is just shy or supposed to be moronic
    >I'm literally him, be he has a job
    never considered suicide as seriously as that

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Why the frick would you watch that movie with your parents?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        when I first watched it I had my life under control

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >pathetic self-pity assmad virgin thread number 3201204101924

    i love how much validation you absolutely need from other anons about no gf its beyond hilarious

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Cinemaphile feels threads were part of Cinemaphile before any reddit Black person

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I think it's funny. there's no self pity for me.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Agree. Just interesting to see many cases where little frick ups and a bit of autismo were enough to cast someone out of society almost entirely.
        The requirement for absolute comformity in social environments is very real.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        okay, good, just as long as you know you deserve none

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If it's any condolence to you anons here in this thread, just know that women make stupid decisions in pursuit of romance, even autistic-tier ones. I have a few good female friends so I've witnessed first and secondhand a girl expecting her crush that she only just stares at IRL to start talking to her after she does nothing more than add him on social media, trying to make a guy jealous and entice him to make a move by talking about receiving sexts from a rando in front of them, stealthily coming up from behind and grabbing a guys ass, trying to show off their body by squatting like a Vietnamese villager instead of squatting (lol), and coming up with teases that are more like actual insults. They really have no idea what they're doing and the only advantage they have is a wide array of men will throw themselves at them and eventually they'll settle for one for better or worse.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >some years back dating a girl I thought was really nice from work
      >she says something after a few dates like "anon, I wish you'd be more dominant with me"
      >next date I turn up after having about 5 pints (not shitfaced, just enough to get amped up)
      >slap her on the ass and say something like "I want to rip your dress off and go upstairs"
      >she's visibly upset
      >asks why I'm being so insensitive
      >says I should go home
      >wtf.jpeg
      >think frick this and just walk out the door and text her later that it's not going to work out
      >"can't we just be friends"
      >no.
      women can be so fricking moronic

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        top kek anon. women don't know what they want

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I've has similar shit happen

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >just know that women make stupid decisions in pursuit of romance
      opening their legs to chad thinking he'll fall in love with her, has been my experience. Women's mistakes only ruin them for the men they end up with.

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