what the fuck

what the fuck

  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >bookfags still think that leaving this out was a bad idea

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Bookfag here, it was a great idea to leave it out. Same as Bombadil and Glorfindel

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The hobbits never would have been accepted or been able to acclimate back into their old society if it weren't for that rebellion where they could be leaders and bond with their countryhobbits.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Why would you think that? Merry and Pippin were both very popular in their own families before they even set out on the journey. Sam is only concerned with the Gaffer and Rosie, both of whom like him. And Frodo is perfectly content to be an eccentric loner

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >DER DER DER
            You try going to war and returning home. It will change you. They even tried to touch on this in the film when they all sat down to share a drink, but it was completely fluffed over by their newfound courage (only illustrated with Sam) to ask out the girl.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              The book doesn't really show any evidence of the hobbits' demeanor or outlook on life changing after they return. Frodo was always melancholy and distant, Merry was always organised, brave and stalwart etc.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Because there was no contrast. They fit into the situation well and rose to the occasion to lead. They didn't have trouble adapting because it was the rest of the hobbits in the shire that had to adapt to a threat the 4 have experience in dealing with.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That's not true at all. Frodo comes back nearly broken. He never really recovers from the journey and he even gets sick every year at the anniversary of the nazgul stabbing him.
                The entire reason the end of the story is so sad is because Frodo chooses to leave Middle Earth, essentially he chooses death because he never really returned from Mt. Doom.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Correct, don’t forget Merry and Pippin we’re now the hobbit equivalent of 7ft tall because they drank the ent cum

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Point is if they returned to a normal shire, they would have trouble relating with people again.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Didn't happen to Bilbo

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yes it did, dumbass lol
                He hated his family and was supremely irritated with them. He lived like a hermit writing a book, and he insulted everyone at his birthday party before attempting to run away.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                There's absolutely no indication that he hated them less before leaving on his quest

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Irrelevant.
                If you deny the very fact that returning from war causes difficulty in acclimating to society, you are ignoring vast amounts of suicide data.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >ABLOOBLOOBLOO I GOT TO SHOOT HUNS AND IT MADE ME SAD, BOO HOO BOO HOO, I'M GONNA GO SHOOT MYSELF NOW, WAAH WAAAAH WAAAH

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It's not just combat. Even normal military people that don't see war time have trouble acclimating into society because there is such a difference in social interactions.
                That picrel is of a guy that likely never took off his uniform even when retired.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                War is good, the average person loves war, there should be more war.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I'm amazed you didn't join to support The ukraine.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I would support both sides of the conflict if I had the means.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous
              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Bilbo had trouble adjusting
                >No he didn't
                >"Irrelevant"

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You're denying facts.
                >knock knock
                >I'M NOT AT HOME

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Have you read the hobbit? He wasn't exactly a jovial party animal before that. Plus everyone hates the Sackville bagginses, even without being in a war

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                He was anti-adventure and had to be talked into it.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yes, I agree

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Gandalf picked him for his traits. Those traits were exacerbated by the adventure.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Bilbo, the guy that was jaded and acted like he hated the shire? Thats the bilbo we are talking about? Seems like he resented being cooped up after his adventure for many years

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        bookfag here! leaving out Bombadil and Glorfindel was fucking dumb. Bombadil adds to the adventure of Frodo and his friends who do not know until they reach Rivendel that they have to make the trip to mount doom. Glorfindel for obvious reasons. There was no need to raceswap him.They wanted to make Arwens love story with Aragorn a little more meaningful. Guess what? the books aren't about romancing! It's just a minor sidestory. They should have given Sarumon his proper ending. Anyhow, rant over.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Bombadil adds ABSOLUTELY nothing and both JRR and Christopher imply as much - he's nothing but a silly callback to Tolkien's children's stories about Bombadil. And Glorfindel would only serve to confuse the audience who wouldn't understand why an Uber elf from heaven who terrifies the Nazgul can't have a major role in the story

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Bombadil adds ABSOLUTELY nothing and both JRR and Christopher imply as much
            Not really. Tolkien said Tom isn't important to the narrative but it's still an "comment" within the story which he finds important. Not everything detail as to relate to the narrative. Some features might exist to add to the world building.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              He will introduce the same problem as Glorfindel. Viewers won't understand why some godlike being who isn't even affected by the Ring (when we see even Gandalf is terrified by it) can't be relied on to help. Tolkien spends a lot of time in the council of Elrond explaining why but the movie is quite long as it is

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >He will introduce the same problem as Glorfinde
                I'm not saying Tom being removed from the movies was a bad idea. I disagree with people saying Tom was pointless in the story completely. When it comes to films, it makes sense to portray the bear minimum since you only have a limited amount of time.
                In the books, however, Tom Bombadil was a crucial part to the Hobbits learning experience. People forget that going outside the Shire is alien to the Hobbits. Outside the Shire is like Mars to them, filled with unknowns. Before the Hobbits met Tom they were attacked by Old Man Willow and didn't even realise they were being attacked. They just started feeling drowsy and thought nothing of it, but it was Old Man Willow who was putting them asleep. Luckily Tom saved them.
                After they meet and leave Tom, the Hobbits get attacked by Barrow Wights. After all the Wise words from Tom Bombadil, Frodo was aware this time of the danger and how to react to this threat. Frodo saved all of the Hobbits then because of what he learned.

                So basically Tom Bombadil is a learning experience for the Hobbits.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Remake it yourself cockfag!

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        This
        I will not listen to Bombadil retards

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Bombadil felt like a The Hobbit leftover plot line. It didn't really feel like something that fit well into LotR

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Good point.

          Frankly, the only parts about the Bombadil arc that I like are Old Man Willow & The Barrow Wrights.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        you're no bookfag

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Moviefag here. You're gay and wrong.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >fag here
        ftfy

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Absolutely embarrassing

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Because fucking around in the woods with joyful hobbits is a bad thing…

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      its literaly the the ultimate lesson of lotr. Taking it out destroyed the meaning of the book and the Arc of the hobits.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >lessons in childrens fantasy books
        lmao go piss yourself kid

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          if you had more lessons as a kid you wouldn't be a Cinemaphile loser
          much to think about my man

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You are also on Cinemaphile

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The end scene in the bar where they quietly have a drink while the dumbass hobbits lose their shit over a big pumpkin conveys the message of "you can't really go home again" much more succinctly in movie form.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Except that it fails to both show off how much our protagonists have grown and changed, and how much Shire itself changed in their absence.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            sam got laid

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >and how much Shire itself changed in their absence
            It didn't

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              But it did in the books, with Saruman shitting up the place with industrialization and the pollution that comes with it.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Pollution doesn't exist, you anti-civilization communist freak.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >commie projecting his love of industry and devotion to corporations onto right wingers who invented the idea of national parks in the first place
                lol

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You would have us all sitting by the campfire singing kumbaya, producing nothing, building nothing, no mark, no legacy. People like you are what ruined the age of industrialization, unionist homosexuals who wanted more and more time away from work, crying and complaining about sore hands and feet, fuck you, your suffering was towards a cause greater than yourself and you rejected it for a few extra hours of debaucheries and comfort. Repeal all labor laws and see how much greater society could be.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >BUH BUH BUH HOW CAN I LEAVE ANYTHING BEHIND IF I DON'T DESTROY NATURE FOR THE SAKE OF DEAR LEADER SPONSORED BY COCA COLA
                Stupid commie, men live in harmony with nature and not in spite of it.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You support idle degeneracy, a good day to you is laying on pillows and sequins and smoking and thinking of nonexistent fantasies. A good day for me would be filled with toil and sweat, backbreaking labour, work to construct monuments that will last forever.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                What's the last monument you actually constructed lol?
                You are literally sitting around talking pleasure in imagined things.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Pristine, delicate fingers typed this post. The proof that you are not a laborer is that you think physical workers don't want better conditions and more time off. Go visit a construction site, a dock, an hospital, a factory and ask the people breaking their backs if they'd like more work. You have zero experience in these fields, limp-wristed homosexual. Go dig a basement, let's see if you'd beg for overtime after a week.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Labourers are not parasites, parasites want all the free time they can, labourers want to end the day knowing that they contributed to the project.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous
              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why should I care what some miscegenated worm has to say?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                This image pisses me off because of how much industrialization was required to construct that building

                They just want to push the ugly parts of industrialism away from their living space and onto poor people

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >This image pisses me off because of how much industrialization was required to construct that building
                new world moment

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Peak amerimutt larping as european. Your capitalist hellscape society isn’t traditional in any capacity, the enlightenment bullshit that served as its foundation is inherently pozzed and tolkien recognised this. I’m sick of americans pretending to be european.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Your capitalist hellscape society isn’t traditional in any capacity,
                never claimed that, AIDS-brain
                but it was said "(much) industrialization was required to construct such a building" as depicted in the pic at

                , which is outrageous considering the happened between the mid-1700s to mid-1800s, which is obviously long after many such buildings were constructed around the world.
                >the enlightenment bullshit that served as its foundation is inherently pozzed
                no shit, dingus
                also, the pic is my first post ITT
                OWND

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >considering the happened
                considering the industrial revolution happened*

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Slith your throat commie you literally deserve to die. You lost. Die fucking scum you piece of shit motherfucker I hope your next call is bad news.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >t. NEET

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I will not be a slave for the sake of your selfish ambitions

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                He doesn't have any ambitions. He spends his free time on Cinemaphile and hasn't done a single day of hard work in his life. nagger should go hang out in a Congolese goldmine mad see how fun it is

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                We don't build pyramids or towers anymore, you ever notice that? We don't have great works anymore, there is no modern Chrysler Building.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                the Central Park Tower was finished in 2020 and it mogs the Chrysler building. you have no idea what you're babbling about because you're a dribbling simpleton retard. the actual reason societal progress slows down is because of mongoloids like you thinking they have a say in anything. that's where the problem comes in. fucktards like you have a voice now.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >this post modern horror show
                >mogs the Chrysler building
                Dumb fucking soulless zoomer commie

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >tfw your architect can't beat the first level of tetris

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >mogs
                yeah, it does

                >B-B-BUT OLD GOOD
                >N-NEW BAD

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Did you just make up a response to your non argument? Jesus christ you're a homosexual, no wonder that slop architecture appeals to you.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Hilarious that you think people liked and copied the Chrysler building because of its size

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                How many people worked on it? We have 7 billion people on this earth, our great works should involve millions of labourers toiling away to build magnificent structures that pierce the firmament.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >we don't build pyramids
                Wrong.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It needs to be larger and more elaborate.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                of course it's a fucking fishing store
                >the great pyramid of geezer

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It was originally built as a basketball arena but then the team moved or something.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                How come there aren't any kino set there

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >least evil and megalomaniacal commie

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Liberal freaks like you deserve the bullet. Work or die, that's how it should work, useless eaters and welfare leeches die.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                keep seething impotently, it's very entertaining

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Keep being a burden, I'm sure it won't bite you in the ass when things go south.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Repeal all labor laws and see how much greater society could be.
                Seems like it would be pretty bad for the laborers.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >commie projecting his love of industry and devotion to corporations onto right wingers who invented the idea of national parks in the first place
                lol

                You gay retards should just kiss

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Its a fucking fantasy, retard.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Thanks to them.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah but they changed so much their "home" isn't the same even though it was preserved like it always has been. You don't need to blow up the shire for "you can't go home again" to still work.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            We've just spent 9-12 hours seeing how much they've changed, Merry and Pippin went from stealing crops to killing a Ring Wraith and becoming a Knight of Gondor respectively while Frodo and Sam just killed the ancient evil who was behind the whole fucking adventure in the first place. We don't need some lame adventure to beat a dude named Sharkey to know the hobbits have grown, we've seen it and it's encapsulated in Aragorn's "my friends you bow to no one" speech.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Illiterate.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It's quite a different idea, though. The drink shows that their home is just the same as ever while they have been changed by their adventures, but in the book the Shire wasn't untouched. The old mill had been torn down and replaced with a modern one. Time had moved on without them.

          The idea that everything will be there waiting for you when you get back, if you still want it, is a pretty childish one. Jackson communicates the emotional toll on the Hobbits but not the other side that the Scouring represents.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          That fucking pumpkin became a meme in my household and we shit out pants when it had a cameo in The Hobbit.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I shitted hard on the film changes but thought this was an acceptable ending. The problem with the books was there were like 5 fucking endings. Each more anti-climactic than the last.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I keep hearing this about everything. Everything is the most important, everything is the main point of the story etc. bookfags should learn one day what "adaptation" means.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It's a reflex of the elitism that people on Cinemaphile love. Most people only know the films therefore they don't know about the scouring and you do, therefore it's the best part. You see it on every board and about every hobby. Niche/unknown = good

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          you don’t understand, this part of the story was the WHOLE point

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >its literaly the the ultimate lesson of lotr.
        What's the ultimate lesson of LOTR?
        >Taking it out destroyed the meaning of the book
        What's the meaning of the book?
        >and the Arc of the hobits.
        What's the arc of the hobbits?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >What's the ultimate lesson of LOTR?
          Trust your gardener

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >What's the ultimate lesson of LOTR?
          LoTR's main focus isn't about huge battles or the nation of Men or majestic Elves. Tolkien said LOTR is based primarily on Hobbit's viewpoint and how they go from naive and sheltered life to more wise and experienced Hobbits.

          In Tolkiens own words: LOTR "is planned to be 'hobbito-centric', that is, primarily a study of the ennoblement (or sanctification) of the humble."

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >What's the arc of the hobbits?
          Hobbits are dumb and basic newbies on day 1.
          By the time they destroy the ring and go home, the Hobbits have learnt a lot during their adventures and have matured. Scouring if the Shire and the actions the Hobbits do to save the Shire is a culmination of all of their experience during the war of the Ring.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >What's the ultimate lesson of LOTR?
          White women should be bred by BBC

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >What's the ultimate lesson of LOTR?
          FUCK industrialism and FUCK heretics also i'm gonna FUCK my wife
          t. J.R. Tolkeen

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Anon, this is Cinemaphile. You're casting pearls before swine.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Wtf are you talking about. There's no 'lesson' in lotr. It's a fantasy epic, it's about Wizards fighting dragons and shit

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        the ultimate lesson is the friends we made along the way that didn't die in WWI in some shit hole trench.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It was Tolkien malding they build a bunch of factories in his hometown when he was away in the war and completely out of place in lotr

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Taking it out destroyed the meaning of the book and the Arc of the hobits.
        The ‘arc of the hobbits’ is literally “they are funny little sheltered guy who like to eat and are suddenly thrusted into a war beyond their comprehension. They see and do things a hobbit should never see or do, but they try their best and help save the world, despite the fact no one even knows what a ‘hobbit’ is. Then they come home as heroes.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Of course it was a bad idea, the Scouring is fundamental to the overall theme Tolkien was trying to get across. Literally bookends the physical and emotional journey of the hobbits - the main heros (Jackson changed this role to Aragorn instead so I guess who cares)
      In fairness to Jackson, he probably had no fucking clue what the purpose of this chapter was, having never properly read the books, so just cut it for time and pacing reasons because all he cared about was extending battle/war scenes as much as possible.
      Again something totally in conflict how Tolkien presented his work.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        it wouldn't have worked in the movie

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Awful opinion.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >(Jackson changed this role to Aragorn instead so I guess who cares)
        Literally what the fuck are you talking about?
        Aragorn is barely in the third movie despite the title being about him lol
        The only time where you could say he feels more like a main character is in Two Towers but that's because Jackson cut a lot of the Frodo and Sam stuff to put it into the final movie.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >hobbits waging a guerilla war against the outsiders that took over
      The scouring of the shire is the best part of the book. That being said, it would be impossible to include it in the movie

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >best part of the book
        We've reached levels of contrarianism never before thought possible

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          tbf to the book I probably only think that because I saw the movies before the book. The scouring and Tom Bombadill are the two things not covered by the movies that I can remember, so they're the only parts I didn't already know the outcome.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            The barrow and the tree

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          tbh the books pretty fucking boring. It's definitely a highlight towards the end.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >guerilla war
        there wasn't even a war lol
        for a single ruffian there were like 20 hobbits armed with slings and bows
        the hobbits bashed some skulls, a few hobbits died, ruffians called it quits because they had the fighting experience of the common vatnik

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      no need to put it in the movie, but it was crazy comfy in the book
      like if you walk back to the starting zone in wow and just obliterate hogger in 2 hits

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It was, Saruman makes worm tongue eat the hobbit mayor

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Bookfag here, it was a great idea to leave it out. Same as Bombadil and Glorfindel

      Leaving this out was good.
      But Bombadil would have been pure kino and Jackson is a hack for leaving him out.
      >BUT MUH TIME!
      trim the lovestory between Aragorn and Arwin then, that was barely a thing in the books

      This
      I will not listen to Bombadil retards

      Bombadil felt like a The Hobbit leftover plot line. It didn't really feel like something that fit well into LotR

      >t. Not a merry fellow

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    shakrey, what a rascal

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >be bad guy
    >named Sharkey
    Tolkein strikes again

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Strider vs Sharkey would be epic

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Like Icky vs Insanious

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    i'm starting to think that not reading the books and just enjoying the movies is the way to go

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      True, Tolkien's prose is garbage

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        pyw

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Opinions of tiktok addicts are void anyway

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      yep. jackson eradicated all the bizarre cringe and christcuck shit

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >wikipedia
    so how's your transition going?

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Where the fuck did he get machinery?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's about Tolkien coming back from WWI and his rural idyllic village is now a suburban hellscape so he wants to kill everyone there.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        hitler should've shot him

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Humorously, both Tolkien and Hitler started off with similar jobs in signals (communication) and they were both at Somme. Tolkien, being an educated man who opted to not enlist and instead wait until school was over, was eventually promoted to second lieutenant and commanded infantry whereas Hitler became a field runner (messenger). Both were decorated, but Tolkien opted to not claim his medal(s). Hitler, being enlisted and often present at HQ, had no choice and received an Iron Cross or two after his company got massacred a couple of times.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >but Tolkien opted to not claim his medal(s).
            Not surprising, he became an anarchist after some psychos sent him and his countrymen to die for shit the common man didn't care about

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >look at all these factories that produced stuff for us while we were gone
        >disgusting
        What a dick lol

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          How about not destroying nature in search of shekels?

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Try telling Republicans that

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              We are, try telling the Democrats that destroying and perverting familial bonds is a bad idea.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Oh my, is that the latest thing le Fox news told you? such a good little npc repeating it

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >be Tolkien
            >DUDE I HECKIN' HATE MACHINERY AND COMMERCIALISM
            >anyone let's mass manufacture my books and distribute them around the world using industrialised trade routes so I can pay for my mansion

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >start reading the lotr
        >forward from the author stresses over and over that this wasn't inspired by the war, or anything for that matter, so stop asking him about it and stop talking about it
        Was he just a butthurt aspie that people figured out the obvious parallels?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The dude spent his life learning dead nordic languages that were never really written down, he probably just wanted people to leave him the fuck alone because it was started out as just a way for him to make up his own language and tell his little girl about what daddy did for a living in a way she could understand that got out of control just like CS Lewis wanted to present the concepts of the Holy Trinity and various Christian allegories while simultaneously bitching about and praising Irishness.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          it is the people that are the aspies and should've left him alone

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Was he just a butthurt aspie that people figured out the obvious parallels?
          Some parts of the lotr aren't really parallels. Tolkien himself said the one ring isn't meant to be a nuke since if it were the heroes would have used and saruman would have ended up making his.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I’m sure the war had a complete normal effect on him. Same amount of an effect as getting bit on the hand by a tarantula when he was a child.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Understandable really

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It gives closure to Sauronman, doe

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Is Saruman the big eye? How did he pretend to be Sharkey?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That's Sauron. Completely different character from Sauron's Man.

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    yeah
    I bet that mill fucking worked though, I bet it milled more grain in a day than the old one did in a week

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You know realize a Burt Reynold's movie contains a LOTR reference.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That Sharky, he was a real jerk.

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why didn't tom bombadil just take the ring and party his way to mordor.

    stupid fucking book

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >which pollutes the air and water

    also, it wouldn't have worked in the film. makes sense in the book, essential part of the story, but wouldn't have worked cinematically.

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Bookfags will defend bad decisions by Tolkien to their dying breaths, even decisions pointed out as mistakes by Christopher

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Who cares what Christopher thinks? Stop looking to an authority and read for yourself.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        He spent countless hours in the company of his father and then countless more compiling his thoughts and notes. If anyone knows his mind and intentions, it's Christopher. This doesn't mean I agree with all his opinions, like his blind hatred of the movies

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I don't know why fuckers here hate christopher just because he shitted on the movies. Yeah they are great but as an actual adaptation they were bad, they completely gutted the story that was meant for christopher in the first place(tolkien wrote it for him). And more importantly, he was the only reason why garbage like rings of power were not made until his greedy descendants took over

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >bunch of midgets fighting a 90 year-old guy
    truly the ending that we deserved

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    A much better ending would be the Hobbiton locals barely acknowledging the returning hobbits, just like what happened with Bilbo. It would be a nice contrast to the 50 pages of incessant praise the hobbits received in Gondor and other places. That's exactly what bookending means. The hobbits started out as adventurous weirdos according to most others and they return as such. They know how great their deeds are but they are content to return to their homes, even without anyone kissing their feet. The fact that Tolkien felt the need to impose his post-war trauma on the reader, even at odds with the general character of the book, is exactly the type of "domination of the author" he denounces in his letters.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >at odds with the general character of the book

      You've never read it, then.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I've read everything ever written by Tolkien, including his letters and children's stories.

  16. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    something something the war is never over in a soldier’s mind

  17. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It’s a part of the hero’s journey, chud. Trump lost.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      holy shit, drumpfbabbies just got fucking destroyed

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >chud

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Those are real glasses not wireframes

  18. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why is every Tolkien lore thread so monumentally gay? Imagine a group of people having this much discussion about the intricate details of JK Rowlings' Harry Potter lore

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Imagine a group of people having this much discussion about the intricate details of JK Rowlings' Harry Potter lore
      There are daily HP threads on here that do just that.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        and they're gay as fuck and full of homosexuals

  19. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Memoryholed like Tom Bombadil. What are they trying to hide from us??

  20. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >technology bad
    >atheism bad
    >progress bad
    The books are awful

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >industrial hellscape bad
      >atheism bad
      >progress(ivism) bad
      Yes

  21. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How did a bunch of turbo midgets defeat a wizard exactly?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Being a wizard doesn't save you from a bunch of peasants crushing your skull under a tractor wheel

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's implied that Saruman is almost entirely powerless by that point, he just has some money or persuasion powers to maintain a small mob around him

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Saruman wants revenge, but he's so weak at that point and doesn't have an army that he decides to go to the Shire and bully some midgets.

  22. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Dude I love to pretend that I hate Tolkien and talk shit about his work, it's even better when 14-year old favela monkeys on Cinemaphile think they're in good company, I'm sure nothing will go wrong with this modus operandi over a prolonged period of time!

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Not everyone loves slave morality

  23. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What was Sauromans motivation to go from hightop of Isengard commanding armies to building evil windmills in hicksville

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Pure petty spite basically. It's not really explained all that much, he just lashes out against the hobbits because he can't do anything except talk shit to the actual people who ruined him. He seems more angry that the hobbits stole (stole back that is) his pipe weed than about being run out of isengard

  24. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Would have made for a kino fourth LotR movie.

  25. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The hobbits always were retarded upper middle class british people. That chapter was pure fantasy, they would never rebel against anything

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yes they would because they are not the same hobbits that left the Shire a year ago (when they set out with the ring).
      It's called character arc. Tolkien even says, LoTR isn't about wars or battles or Aragorn and his bitch or Boromir. He specifically said LOTR is fundamentally about the enoblement of Hobbits and the experiences they went through to get that way.

  26. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    yorkSHIRE was, is and will always be, a shithole

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That's nice and all but the Shire is based on Warwickshire where Tolkien grew up.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Warwickshire
        now you are making things up

  27. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    picture of the mill Saruman erected

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      BOOTA

  28. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Tolkien was a philosemite christcuck who literally wrote a letter seething at a nazi where he says he wishes he was israeli

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      nazi's were a laughing stock at the time to be fair to the Professor

  29. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Let's use guerilla warfare to kick out filthy invaders and restore our idyllic home
    Yeah Hollywood would never allow it. Be thankful that LoTR isn't that pozzed overall.

  30. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Read all the Lord of the Rings books
    >Come to this chapter
    >Stupid and boring
    >So bored that I throw the book away twenty pages before the story ends

  31. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why didn't Gandalf just send army of Hobbits to Isengard?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The provisions costs alone would ruin him

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        the lands and local wildlife would never recover from a hobbit siege

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      He did not want to up-end his pipeweed suppliers.

  32. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >this would have driven Tolkien literally insane
    What a bitch.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Even though I love his works he does strike me as an incessant whiner

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        He was also an elitist, he thought Shakespeare was “low brow”.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          That's not a unique opinion, Tolstoy also hates Shakespeare. And in fact he was absolutely low-brow, he constantly writes about fucking and shitting etc. It's just that we tend to remember his impressive vocabulary and more flowery quotes

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Because he was. Being low brow is nothing to be ashamed of if you can pull it off and pull it off well. Shakespeare is mostly sex jokes, scat jokes, dick jokes, fart jokes, and then something happens and everyone claps.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          That's not a unique opinion, Tolstoy also hates Shakespeare. And in fact he was absolutely low-brow, he constantly writes about fucking and shitting etc. It's just that we tend to remember his impressive vocabulary and more flowery quotes

          >Tolkien bashes long dead Shakespeare
          >Shakespeare reincarnates as GRRM and bashes long dead Tolkien

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Shakespeare could write the Danny diarrhea scene 50x better

  33. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    BAU BAU

  34. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Will we ever have something like the Lord of the Rings movies again?

    Even Peter Jackson decided to make soulless CGI slob with wacky fanservice instead, when given a blank check.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      no

  35. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >this confuses and angers the amerimutt

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'm confused and angry

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      English is a pretty obvious choice for an international language because you can know like 12 words and get your point across.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Too bad it's going to be chinese

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          not with their inverted population pyramid its not

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Even if China took over the whole world they're never going to convince people to learn mandarin

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The chinese spend more time learning how to speak english than anyone else in the world. English is going to be the language that spreads to the stars, but the issue then is that English is just one of those languages that likes to change at the drop of a hat so it'll become so bastardized that people will not be able to speak to one another even though they're both speaking "English."

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >tfw indian english will be the lingua franca of the cosmos
            bloody needful

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Be English
        >Dominate world with massive empire
        >Key to your ascendency is the mighty English navy, proud institution which stopped Napoleon's ambitions from polluting your shores. Great force which dominated the oceans, and brought a tiny rain-soaked isle to be king of the world
        >Your tongue becomes the lingua franca of travel, trade, and commerce
        >get mad

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          How the fuck did the english empire even collapse, the UK is so pathetic now.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >How the fuck did the english empire even collapse
            Two world wars and an enormous debt to the ~~*financiers*~~ that made them possible

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous
  36. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Do you think they used the hobbit women as whores? Passed them around like fuck dolls?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Not just the women

  37. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >english is le domineering language that is time proof
    >70% of speakers are indian that wont pass it down generationally

    lmao

  38. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What exactly is wrong with this? The movies leave Saruman locked in the tower surrounded by a couple of trees who will inevitably become bored, and wander back into the woods, then never mentioning Saruman again.

  39. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >brutally mogs the scouring chapter in one simple scene

  40. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    glad they didn't include "sharkey", pfft, in the oscar-winning films. would have ruined them.

  41. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    an allegory for WWI British servicemen returning home to find their darlings riding the British Broadcasting Corporation

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The uttermost fringe of irony is that letting Germany win in either of the two wars would create and maintain the traditional nature attuned world that Tolkien loved so much. And the uppermost ethereal echelon of irony is that Britain is now a colony of India and is ruled by some dravidian brownoid who is notable for his ability to actually shit in a toilet (allegedly). Churchill himself also shat on that which he allegedly fought to defend.

      It's hilarious.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Rishi is the same upperclass plums in mouth tory twat as the rest. There's nothing Indian about him.

  42. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Saruman was a threathening antagonist
    >Gets reduced to comedic relief saturday morning cartoon villain at the end
    I'm glad jackson cut it and gave saruman a proper send off, he's an angel on the same level as sauron, gandalf and the balrong, him being some hobo named sharkey was a disgrace and makes me wonder what the fuck was tolkien thinking

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >what the fuck was tolkien thinking
      He was thinking about how evil people start with good and noble intentions but are slowly reduced into spiteful petty clowns as they spiral downward. Same way as Sauron originally wanted to make the world a more orderly place but ended up being tyrant who just wanted to rule everyone.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >He was thinking about how evil people start with good and noble intentions
        Saruman might not been evil and even volunteered to free ME of sauron, but he wasn't free of many flaws either, he was too prideful and overconfident, and seethed endlessly at gandalf because everyone both in valinor and ME trusted him more than himself

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I'm glad jackson cut it and gave saruman a proper send off, he's an angel on the same level as sauron
      And yet he dies by the knife of a weakling crack addict. Same happens in the books. Saruman gets stabbed by wormtongue. But at least it makes how someone as low as wormtongue was able to kill an all wise and powerful being such as Saruman. Reason being is that he lost most of his power and so was weak enough to be killed by a normie.

  43. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Imaging being an orc and getting a shortstack hobbit girl slave

  44. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Where did Bilbo and Frodo even work before they became adventurers?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Independently wealthy

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        From inheritance. They were parasitic trust fund babies.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Work? You mean that thing that filthy peasants do?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Bilbo was a landlord. Bilbo, Frodo, Merry and Pippin are all upper middle class Hobbits.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      bilbo was loaded beyond belief, he claimed the treasure of the trolls they buried in the hobbit plus he had some gold from the dwarfs iirc
      frodo became his successor

  45. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why is Tolkien so shit at story structure bros? He literally separates Frodo’s adventure and Aragorn’s adventure into different books because apparently he can’t write two things happening at the same time. The Silmarillion is also unreadable

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >The Silmarillion is also unreadable
      The Silmarillion is a frankenstein concoction created by his son

  46. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The ultimate copium section of the trilogy

    >We're totally going to take England back, guys! It will be like it once was, honest!

  47. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The irony poisoning in this thread is too thick, I'm out.

  48. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >My name's Big Sharkey.
    >I run Shire Town.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What a tranny picture.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        shut up and go back to sucking your boyfriend's cock

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous
  49. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  50. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Because they closed the evil polluting factories 20 years prior, and it was the Tories who did it to send the jobs to China and Indonesia.

  51. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I wanted to see the Hobbits brutally kill and dismember the humans

  52. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you see it when frodo has a vision at galadriels crib

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