>What’s wrong babe, you’ve barely touched your Whoppenheimer
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>Whats wrong babe, youve barely touched your Whoppenheimer
>What’s wrong babe, you’ve barely touched your Whoppenheimer
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>the order I got...it's wrong?!
Wait till you find out it wasn't real meat.
Mcdonalds and burger king use human meat in their patties. Why do you think there are so many missing people annually?
>he went to the "urban" burger king
ngmi
I wish I had a gf I'm ready to kill myself
I have a gf and she's such a huge fricking moron that I still feel like killing myself. They don't help.
>I have a gf and she's such a huge fricking moron
Have you stopped to consider what that says about you and your own intelligence? And no, I’m not going to buy the excuse that it’s a “purely out of desperation” situation because that’s an absolute cop-out and at most only partially true.
Ynbaw, I don't care what she thinks of me because she's demonstrably less competent
All women are borderline moronic and have the emotional maturity of a 13 year old, even the ones that have college degrees and seem successful.
>I’m not going to buy the excuse that it’s a “purely out of desperation” situation
Do you think getting a girlfriend is easy? Most of us take whatever we can get.
>Do you think getting a girlfriend is easy?
Kinda, yeah. I was a pussyless homosexual for like 8 years and literally the first night I went out to get a drink by myself I had a woman come up to me and start talking to me and invite her to come with her to a party, this was like 3 months ago and it's been going great ever since
Never happened, frick off
swear to god. she started talking to me because I was wearing a corduroy bomber jacket and she thought it was nice, which it is
she literally said to her friend, "look, like look at him. he looks like he gets mad chicks." when I had not been touched by a woman in almost a decade
Ok very cool, then you must be very attractive and tall or simply a liar because that simply doesn't happen to the average man
In other words, frick off
I'm 5'4. I weigh 150 pounds (kinda fat for me). I wear glasses. I do not work out.
But I know how to dress and smell good and smile and talk, and my glasses are stylish and the clothes I wear when I go out are stylish too.
So when women see me, they see a "nerdy looking short guy" who has put in a bit of effort and then after 5 seconds of thinking, they go "oh he's kinda cute."
And then, realize that the other men in the bar don't do that. It really helps that other men are unwashed fricking rednecks with horribly unkempt beards and smell like shit and wear dirty t-shirts.
To a woman who is down to clown for a night, I look like a great venture. Even if I'm short as frick and kinda scrawny.
>Do you think getting a girlfriend is easy?
Is it exceptionally easy. The fact that you even ask that question with the bitter, resentful implication that it is not is disturbing. There is literally nothing easier than getting a girlfriend. That doesn't necessarily mean you will get a GOOD one right away, it kind of takes some effort and pain and learning to find the right partner, which is just a part of living. But it's not hard at all to get the basics down. Literally all you have to do is take a shower, go outside, and talk to people.
>women by themselves glued to their phone screen 24/7
>more likely will have friends around them to gatekeep strangers from trying bullshit pick ups
Yeah, real easy. Frick off, normie frick.
> I wish I had a gf I'm ready to kill myself
Having to deal with all the bullshit from a gf makes it dubiously worth it.
I’m about to have a new one and I’m mad at myself about it
You're unironically better off alone. Just get friends with benefits or get prostitutes. Women will break you.
getting a gf doesnt fix anything, women are fun for about 30 minutes a day
Marriedgay here. Cherish your freedom. Pussy isn't as good as you think.
>Rice cooker
I mean it's funny. But still.
>rice cooker
sounds like a deal!
>have it…my way?
>This is literally a meme and nothing is used with permission
>Rice cooker
Way to ruin your own joke. Making it plausible is better.
Old Cinemaphile would have made this look like a real ad and then let it go viral on Fox News.
Old Cinemaphile would be jerking off to trannies while crying about evil white christian bankers oppressing black people
Old Cinemaphile knew how to do more than one thing at once, it's true.
who cares those guys were gays
>no jalepenos
>”whopper whopper whopper.. whopper?”
>two orders for fat man and fat boy?
It's a pacifier actually
>record scratch
>camera quick zooms in on oppie
>his eyes bulge
>'thats... not how I used it!'
>camera cuts to oppies 3d talking squirrel companion voiced by jack black who proceeds to scream 'thats nuts!'
>DAMMIT STAROS! You shove that bomb up your ass RIGHT NOW! I TELL YOU, NOW! DO YOU HEAR ME!?!?
>the rice cooker keychain....was included in my order?
>My Whoppenheimer was smothered in mayonnaise. I've raised this concern many times
>my day....is ruined?
heh
>I wanted a burger king... I didn't want to be the bomb king.
Turn your little boy into a fat man
this has to be the best post made by a shill in tv history
I haven’t had burger king in over a decade
Good. Keep your memories of BK when it was decent. The BK you remember is dead. It's gone down hill a bit...
the BK in my town is the best fast food restaurant by a country mile, and everything they make is fresh and tasty
and if you're ordering fast food in a megalopolis like NYC or LA and getting served by Black folk, when there are 500 perfectly good restaurants otherwise to choose from, you deserve to eat garbage
it takes real fricking drooling moron to order fast food in a megacity
i only go when i get suspicious that the wendys and mcdicks cashiers are on the brink of recognizing me
The last time I had Burger King was in the Madrid Airport. It was the only place still open at the hours I was in and they charged a fortune just for fries, nuggets, and a burger. The burger tasted dry and bland and the nuggets were moist like they had been frozen for weeks and were just put in the microwave for no more than a minute. It was completely awful. Avoid Burger King at all cost.
Are you hungarian and bohred of the same burger? You'll feel like a neu man after you try this bomb. Let's slotin some lettuce. Tomatoes, fresh from the ferm in Los Alamos. And the meat? It's so fein, man. You can am death and destroy some worlds too. It's the Whoppenheimer! It ain't relative...
>rice cooker
I-I'll have uh the... one withe the sausage an-
The what?
t-the doomsday p-patty meltdown
>I am become King
My ten year old sister loves playing with her whoppenheimer in the bathtub.
>A taste to detonate your senses
>Flavor that radiates victory
>A big burger... for you
>Not the burger we deserved, but the burger we needed
Sex is like the human equivalent of filling up your gas tank. It's really great when you're low on gas and think "Cool, now I can go anywhere." And maybe even in the next morning you think "man I'm sure glad I filled up my tank last night." But after that you don't think about it. It's just not really an issue.. until your tank starts running low again.
Sex won't save your life, learning to interact positively with your fellow man will.
get the WhOppenheimer or the Matt Damon MOST IMPORTANT Chicken Sandwich
it took me like a minute to understand the rice cooker part
i am moronic bros
>Number one in the hood baby.