Who says women aren't funny?
 Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
 |
Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
Who says women aren't funny?
Who says women aren't funny?
Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
|
Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
the entire list is abysmal
i went to a stand up gig a couple of months ago.
roughly 15 different comedians over the course of 2 hours. didn't laugh once
>Hey, you know what’s cool? The vaccine.
>Yup, I have 3 boosters.
>Everyone should get more shots.
>…
>That’s it, have a good night!
Private Eye reported that pretty much everybody on the list was represented by the same PR company and that the list was created prior to the Fringe happening.
Marketing for Morons
literally everything is fake and marketing now
i have like ptsd symptoms watching any "viral" video because i know it's going to be fake and trying to sell me something
How can she use a joke that old men have used for decades?
I think it's great that they gave first prize to a slow second grader. Is that her mom holding the trophy?
It's not funny because obviously she would know if he was a cheetah and cheetahs aren't zookeepers. It's just pointing out that the word cheater and cheatah sounds the same, the setup makes no sense.
Why are her eyes upside down?
>level 2 noticing
shut it down
This worked better than I thought but I'm still not convinced
Realized I put them on mirrored like a moron, I'm convinced now
Holy shit. Just need to move the eyelashes up now and she looks better than before lmao
If someone with photoshop skills can do a Mystery of the Druids it would absolutely make my day
God damn it, this is MUCH funnier than her so-called "joke". Or maybe I'm just a moron. Maybe both!
Scottish genes.
Demons can't make themselves look perfectly human. Same reason a lot of times they'll have animal parts or whatever. This is an advanced technique.
>woman makes a joke
>it's about sex
thats not even good
heres mine...
A black man walks in to a pub with a parrot on his shoulder.
"Where did you get that" The barman asks
"Africa" Says the parrot.
"There's thousands of them!"
you go, girl!
Grim.
>Lorna described herself as "blooming chuffed"
as WHAT? in english, doc
It means very happy.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-66569215
>2. The most British thing I've ever heard? A lady who said 'Well I'm sorry, but I don't apologise.' - Liz Guterbock
that's a joke from the simpsons
>4. When women gossip we get called b***hy; but when men do it's called a podcast - Sikisa
i've seen that as a twitter screencap
these are all terrible. the only one close to funny is 9 and more in a "heh, yeah that's a good point"
9 made me smile but the rest were pitiful
Europeans are not funny
>When women gossip we get called b***hy; but when men do it's called a podcast
lol
When do men gossip? Work? Women's magazines? Tattle Life?
stand up was never good
>woman wins by reusing super old joke, probably made by a man
Imagine being proud to hold a “Dave” award… whatever the frick that is. She have her high school diploma framed on the wall too?
Dave is a shitty channel for shitty comedy and I suppose they have a shitty award for it too.
>She have her high school diploma framed on the wall too?
We don't have those.
>the Dave channel
Literally never heard of it and only mentally ill boomers watch cable anymore.
Does Dave have that much original programming now? Channel 4 used to be the home for more creative/alternative comedy (yoof audience etc).
I watched Asylum recently, the early Edgar Wright/Simon Pegg/Jessica Stevenson thing. Not sure if The Paramount Channel (UK) commissioned it, it comes across like a student film they were sent and decided to broadcast.I enjoyed it.
Taskmaster was originally on Dave. As Yet Untitled with Alan Davies is basically a televised podcast, but pretty entertaining (though you could tell the producers had more control over the guests in the last season). Big Zuu's Big Eats is enjoyable for what it is
>Taskmaster was originally on Dave.
Oh right had the Channel 4 takeover backwards.
Is it any good? I like the idea but it's actually ABOUT THE TASKS, right?
>americans get diplomas for finishing high school
I have a pakistani who lives next door to me,
He said the other day to me "I'm a better man than you"
I said "I never said you fricking wasn't, but what makes you think your a better man than me?"
He said "I don't have a fricking Paki, living next door to me"
the whole kindergarten was going apeshit, I bet
lowkey racist
That doesn't make any sense
the joke is that she fricks animals
he was black
you're moronic
It's a play on your expectations. You see, she meet the "zookeeper" in a zoo, as would be expected from his job, but in fact he was an animal (black).
You can't mistake a person from an animal though so the joke doesn't make sense.
People do all the time, it's a commentary on that
>You can't mistake a person from an animal though
I know you mean in a social setting, but have you ever lived in really low-income area? Rough council estate?
A mound on the floor could be a pile of rubbish, a large dog, or someone passed-out/OD'd.
>That doesn't make any sense
I don't get it, zookeepers are humans not animals
but what if they were
>I started dating someone I met at the zoo, I thought they were a keeper, turns out they were a cheetah!
Fix'd
So much better.
ywnbaw
much better
Is adding a line like
>I need to get my eyes checked
at the end too much? It seems funnier to me but it might be redundant
Don't quit you day job, anon
this works so much better i feel like it's what the joke was originally supposed to be, or what the woman was trying to say
Give her a discount.
It doesn't scan you fricking virgin. Hate Internet people like you. Think you're a great wit. Don't talk in public. Won't take risks...so you can nevee fail.
gay
Chill out Lorna
Nailed it.
Man says to his wife: 'Pack your bags, I've won the lottery.'
She says: 'What should I pack? Something light, something warm? Where are we going?'
He says: 'We're going nowhere. Just pack your bags and frick off.'
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get away from the Black person!
The pasta joke from last year was worse. Too many words for a straightforward pun.
the people that attend concerts, movies, and comedy festivals sre subhuman vaxxoids. Isn't that funny?
>i started dating a guy i met at a zoo, but it turned out he was a cheetah
isn't that how the joke usually goes?
>My friend got locked in a coffee place overnight. Now he only ever goes into Starbucks, not the rivals. He's Costa-phobic
I don't get it.
Claustrophobic
costa is a coffee shop chain like starbucks and costa-phobic sounds a bit like claustrophobic
>jokes
>a poor play on words that barely works that relies on your knowledge of corporate brands to even understand
Holy shit, fricking pick one. Christ.
it's a reference to a Stewart Lee bit about the audience having a sectarian attitude toward coffee shop brands, itself a metatextual deconstruction of attitudes following the Reformation.
>I started dating a zookeeper, but it turned out he was a cheetah - Lorna Rose Treen
The most British thing I've ever heard? A lady who said 'Well I'm sorry, but I don't apologise.' - Liz Guterbock
>Last year I had a great joke about inflation. But it's hardly worth it now - Amos Gill
When women gossip we get called b***hy; but when men do it's called a podcast - Sikisa
>I thought I'd start off with a joke about The Titanic - just to break the ice - Masai Graham
How do coeliac Germans greet each other? Gluten tag - Frank Lavender
>My friend got locked in a coffee place overnight. Now he only ever goes into Starbucks, not the rivals. He's Costa-phobic - Roger Swift
I entered the 'How not to surrender' competition and I won hands down - Bennett Arron
>Nationwide must have looked pretty silly when they opened their first branch - William Stone
My grandma describes herself as being in her "twilight years" which I love because they're great films - Daniel Foxx
These are dogshit, milquetoast, Christmas cracker rejects. BUT can (You) write a better joke that wouldn't have you dragged off stage by the thought police?
no but i can just steal a mitch hedberg joke
>My grandma describes herself as being in her "twilight years" which I love because they're great films - Daniel Foxx
kek this isn't even a fricking joke. just sounds like something a wandering moron would say
A YouGov poll reported that most mothers in Britain describe themselves as being in their "twilight years". The Government responded with a new initiative to tackle teenage pregnancy.
LMFAO
>>I thought I'd start off with a joke about The Titanic - just to break the ice - Masai Graham
it didn't break the ice though
>he thinks the titanic was the ship
that's a literal christmas cracker joke
it's usually something like
>FAT PENGUIN! Sorry, I wanted to say something that would break the ice.
What does a urologist researcher shout when making a discovery?
Urethra!
I saw “gluten tag” in a Spurdo post about amerigens years ago.
Is this like the post-irony ironic humor? so cringe its actually good?
If it's meant to flop in a deadpan way at the expense of the performer,. that's a pretty standard routine. If you're meant to squirm at the character in an Alan Partridge/The Office type of way, I don't see it.
>post-irony ironic humor?
This Morning With Richard Not Judy had a series of sketches about writers for the magazine 'The Ironic Review' struggling to keep coming up with postmodern ideas.
Nathan Barley hit a sweet spot here. Different creative types clashing, but that leads to misunderstandings/situations.
>I was at [local mall] last week and as I was heading out to the parking lot I saw a sign taped to a door that said "this door temporarily closed".
>I used to be quite the alcoholic but I'm trying to cut back. I've switched to club soda as my drink of choice. It's great because when you're a drunk you spill red wine or whatever on your shirt and now it's ruined; now whatever I spill my drink on is actually cleaner on average than it was before.
>I figure that billboards for a sale at [glasses store] must be a great place to really frick people with the fine print.
>Last year I had a great joke about inflation. But it's hardly worth it now
Power gap
>the one about nationwide
>Abyssal power gap of death
>the rest
None of them are kneeslappers but that’s my take
I'm pretty sure I've heard the inflation one before otherwise I would agree
*walks on to Fringe stage*
"fisherman? a catch."
encore? I hardly knew ore!
*walks on to Fringe stage*
"fisher price? a catch."
>fisher price
"thought he was a banker, turned out he just worked at the Early Earning Centre."
the cringe festival as I call it
hate being in the city when it's going on
Women are the past, present and future of comedy
>literal dad jokes
Bros, I hope you have some oxygen tanks with you if you wish to have any chance of surviving this because you're not going to be able to breathe from laughing
Can someone recommend a female comedian joke that doesn't have to do with veganas, dating, or how much they hate men?
Maria Bamford
Taylor Tomlinson sometimes
After going to see Jerry Sadowitz all stand up is bland and shit now.
HAW!
There are entire films of one-liners. Doesn't it actually take more effort and attention span to scroll through TIkTok/memes than it does to watch a Groucho Marx film?
I live very close to Edinburgh but never had the urge to going during The Fringe, it just looks like utter shit
Stand-up is so safe and sanitised now. Comedians are terrified of offending anyone and getting cancelled. They cant take the risks.
I fricking LOVE women bros
>yurocuck comedy
That adds up to over 300%
sounds like an american election
voters picked their top 3
The only decent joke is the Nationwide one.
It would be if that was their original name instead of a rebranding
There’s a couple of sort of funny one liners in there. But this is the cream of the crop?
The whole point of the Edinburgh Fringe is it's amateurs and weirdos who weren't good enough for the mainstream comedy festival.
>Bretts Joke
Now that is a top tier banger
Memes aside, why can’t female comedians ever tell a funny story? Im not even talking about boring normie women, but PROFESSIONAL COMEDIANS. Even the most basic ass male comedians like jimmy carr will make me atleast chuckle a few times
jordan jensen's a good story teller but that's because she just had a fricked up life but she's usually too drugged out to tell them properly now
From what I've seen the progs are completely wrong, straight white males are the only group that DOESN'T get rewarded for mediocrity.
I don't get it.
Hahahahahahahaha
I find women incredibly unfunny, but I'm open to the possibility that they find each other funny. Maybe all those vegana jokes are genuinely hilarious to them.
>blooming chuffed
wtf is wrong with br*toids?
Women lack a sense of humor.
>I'm tired of so much sex on the telly, I mean, I keep falling off