>rat-like money grubbing sleaze ball character
He let Peter go months without paying rent and excused all his most shitty behavior because "he's a good boy." What about him is sleazy or money-grubbing? Just the fact that he's a landlord?
Already in love with his childhood friend who also happens to be a Broadway star beauty.
Why would he go for a skinny girl who he doesn't know, who can't hold a conversation and who has some of the most obnoxious family imaginable?
I had one of these as a gf for 4 years but she trooned out in 2016. She looked almost exactly like OP image come to think of it. It's what drove me (back) to Cinemaphile as formerly bluepilled oldgay.
I am lovely my life is a nightmare. Being kind and emotionally steady attracts abusive and unstable people unfortunately. The next gf kept threatening to kill herself if I broke up with her and then finally did after 3 years.
Living with me is not a problem because I have stopped dating people and keep to myself.
his "crush" was getting dick downed and creampied by every single one of his rivals and even his best and only friend (lmao). then she had a woman moment when he couldn't give her 100% of his attention because he was literally saving little kids and old ladies lives and battling terrorists trying to blow up the city
And she got mad when Peter was happy because Spider-Man was loved by the peoples
she yelled at him when he told her not to pay too much attention to the critic, that he received lots of them (literally called a terrorist, a threat to society while he risks his life every day for the good) so that she was criticized for singing badly (which is true)
>roastie who would leave on man at the altar
Forgot about that, and he was an ASTRONAUT. What a dumb fricking b***h she couldn't have said something at any time during the massive and costly wedding planning? Not to mention flying family and shit in to attend. goddamn I hate raimis mary jane so much it's unreal
>marry Ursula who actually loves you >her father owns the building (in NYC) which means he owns a property worth millions >he can let you stay rent free (in NYC) for the rest of your life
Peter was legit moronic
I hate MJ with a passion. This Peter Black person fights super powered and enhanced criminals, he could punch through your fricking skull, b***h and what do you do???
You fricking cuck him over and over again YOU FRICKING SLAVIC LOOKING BLOATED UGLY b***h
Ditkovich liked Peter. He would probably be ok with it as long as he treated his daughter right. Peter is also a nerd homebody who doesn't drink, has a job at a major newspaper and is getting a stem degree so he's like a 10/10 in slavistan.
The one that wouldn't pay because the pizzas were a minute late despite it being no skin off her bones? Not like she bought all those pizzas with her own money. She was trying to hoard her corporate master's shekels for him. Peter knew she was israeli and would never have anything to do with her.
Imagine slamming into that 90 pounder while she giggles awkwardly and tries to act “sexy” the way a 1st generation immigrant girl who only knows about sex from fanfiction knows how
>bop
Why are people using this word suddenly to describe promiscuous women. It's from such a long time ago, like simp. Do zoomies just carry around a book of old timey slang and then pick a random page and put it in a hip hop song on a tiktok?
The happiest, strongest, and longest lasting relationships are between a woman who is absolutely in LOVE with a man, and a man who thinks she’s frickable and just pleasant enough to be around.
A man who chases a woman will never succeed.
A man and woman who chase each other will never succeed.
A woman who chases a man and a man who tolerates her is the closest thing to true love like in a sappy movie that it can come.
This but i do think that 'just toleranting' is a bit harsh
people and long marriages back then weren't exactly madly in love but they sure didn't just 'tolerate' each other
>people and long marriages back then weren't exactly madly in love but they sure didn't just 'tolerate' each other
Human relationships are built on necessity. When two people genuinely depend on each other an instinctual stockholm syndrome bonds them tight. That's just tribal shit. We're designed to live in communities where we genuinely depend on those closest to us for survival.
Before they could rely on big daddy government to service their every need (at mens' expense), a woman NEEDED her man. Her instincts made her love him.
Military camaraderie might be the only version of this phenomenon that still exists.
Sad but true. I used to chase girls like I was Mordecai or some shit, and I knew they were giggling about it to their friends and to the dudes they actually wanted. So I stopped chasing. My now-wife would never get out of my face or stop messaging me and I found her a bit annoying until we hooked up, and she was actually pretty chill.
>You want door fix, Man of Spiders? Yes, I know these things you do, I learn how to find many secrets in old country. You will not pay rent? This is fair. We will take rent in other ways. When I was in old country, in Bosnia, my friends and I... we do things to women. Terrible things, make them ugly women who will never be loved. Your friends, redhead girl and science girl... they will beg me to stop, as my men and I rain alternating blows of ejaculateing and fists upon them. And when they are broken, Man of Spiders, when they are nothing more than shells... you will know the rent is paid.
For those who want to be part of this epic Cinemaphile forced meme there are three easy steps.
Step 1: This is considered the most important step. See what movie this epic Cinemaphile meme is being applied to today. Most of the time it's the older Sam Raimi Spiderman movies but since these threads die very fast the guys that force this apply it to other movies now. This thread however uses the Raimi Spiderman meme. Please pay attention.
Step 2: Take an iconic scene in the movie, any will do as long as people remember the scene. Greentext a quote from the scene and twist the words to use anti semitisim, racism, homophobia or any other edgy as frick topic. Go nuts, the sky is the limit! The more vulgar it is the more epic the meme is. This takes us to the final step.....
Step 3: Make a regular post, taking the position of a normal person and pretend to be disgusted by that scene. I know, I know, this is Cinemaphile, a site where gore flows like fine wine but that's what makes this meme edgy, wacky and zany. We pretend to be offended by that fake scene. Funny huh?
Now that you understand how to do this, have fun kids. Happy memeing!
>"You know, Peter, with great power comes great responsibility. Rudyard Kipling called it "White Man's Burden." Myself, I just call it as I see it: the responsibility of the master to discipline the servant." >Ben looks directly at the camera. >"The Black folk, the spics, the chinks...It's our responsibility to civilize them. And if we can't? Then they shall dangle from the elm tree. The Day of the Rope is near, Pete. We'll have every Black person in this country dead or in chains in 10 years, God bless the American Nazi Party."
She was literally a plant by the landlord to spy on him and weaken his defenses.
The landlord demanded rent and he used his prostitute daughter to suck the currency directly from his webbed wiener.
>The landlord demanded rent and he used his prostitute daughter to suck the currency directly from his webbed wiener.
Ursula: "I brought you cake."
(Peter Parker eats the cake)
(Travels to J. Jonah Jameson's office in his Spider-Man costume)
(Pulls down his pants... Exposing his erect wiener)
Spider-Man: "You need pictures of me to sell your malingering newspaper stories, you shameless defamer..."
(Noisily ejaculates, as his dick shoots out web fluid, with a brief "TWWWWIPPP" noise)
Spider-Man: "That's your reward you big mouth. Gotta go, more cake's waiting for me."
(Leaps to ceiling, opens office window, pulls up pants, leaving a noticable tenting pole jutting in the clingy spandex tights. He exits as quietly as he came).
HERE'S YOUR NO-PRIZE REWARD KIDDOS!
"Unstable Molecules" fused to superhero costumes hard to destroy? A clever hyper-polymer created by Redd Richards as a mix of Platinum, Nylon, and Titanium fibers? NO! Not at all.
Unstable Molecule costumes popped up after ISSUE 4 of the Fantastic Four first run. What happened then, dear readers? That's right, we meet the mysterious morphing SKRULLS. Creatures which can simulate the texture, density, durability of rock, metal, water, plastic, and many things you cannot imagine. So did Reed Richards, the elastic super genius "create" unstable molecules from these Skull Costumes or Skrull DNA? NO! Such a source would be near impossible to fabricate with 1960's technology. But Reed Richards did have 4 hypnotized Skull Invaders fantastically mesmerized into believing they are simple cows. What's left over from cattle harvesting? Leather. Or in this case SKRULL SKIN LEATHER. A fantastic substance that can assume the density and shapes of anything you imagine, and after encountering the galactic invader Super-Skrull, there was clear indisputable truth that Skrull Flesh can withstand the rigors of the cosmic energy that gave our Fantastical Family their powers. All that's left was breeding more Skrull Cow Hybrids
>hey mr ditkovitch i just deposited my rent in your bawd account
>mr ditkovitch
Why did they name the rat-like money grubbing sleaze ball character after the creator of Spider-Man?
>rat-like money grubbing sleaze ball character
He let Peter go months without paying rent and excused all his most shitty behavior because "he's a good boy." What about him is sleazy or money-grubbing? Just the fact that he's a landlord?
is free country, not rent free country
too israeli
Already in love with his childhood friend who also happens to be a Broadway star beauty.
Why would he go for a skinny girl who he doesn't know, who can't hold a conversation and who has some of the most obnoxious family imaginable?
Because his broadway star crush was barely able to tolerate him.
Because a derpy wife who loves you and cooks for you is a treasure.
I had one of these as a gf for 4 years but she trooned out in 2016. She looked almost exactly like OP image come to think of it. It's what drove me (back) to Cinemaphile as formerly bluepilled oldgay.
yikes
you must be a nightmare to live with
I am lovely my life is a nightmare. Being kind and emotionally steady attracts abusive and unstable people unfortunately. The next gf kept threatening to kill herself if I broke up with her and then finally did after 3 years.
Living with me is not a problem because I have stopped dating people and keep to myself.
his "crush" was getting dick downed and creampied by every single one of his rivals and even his best and only friend (lmao). then she had a woman moment when he couldn't give her 100% of his attention because he was literally saving little kids and old ladies lives and battling terrorists trying to blow up the city
ill add to the last point. she even KNEW he was spiderman at that point and not just mysteriously absent for no reason
And she got mad when Peter was happy because Spider-Man was loved by the peoples
she yelled at him when he told her not to pay too much attention to the critic, that he received lots of them (literally called a terrorist, a threat to society while he risks his life every day for the good) so that she was criticized for singing badly (which is true)
>in love with the bawd who fricked his high school bully, his best friend, and his boss' son
spider-man's real arch nemesis is low self-esteem
Spiderman is a loser incel confirmed. Did he ever even lose his virginity?
If you honestly believe MJ was worth pursuing you need to rewatch these movies.
Peter Parker must've gotten concussed if he wanted a run through roastie who would leave on man at the altar over Ursula.
Does Peter just think MJ's attention whorishness would allow her to be loyal to him? He's seen how MJ hops on the wiener carousel.
>roastie who would leave on man at the altar
Forgot about that, and he was an ASTRONAUT. What a dumb fricking b***h she couldn't have said something at any time during the massive and costly wedding planning? Not to mention flying family and shit in to attend. goddamn I hate raimis mary jane so much it's unreal
It's a shame, he missed out on that WNBA money.
Cameron Brink was 2 months old when Spiderman 1 came out
I'm so fricking old.
Frick off.
Tens of dollars
he should have at least taken her mouth
Bruh why tf did he fumble that ugly girl with the starvation physique? That’s hella not okay
cause she wasn't right in the head
>marry Ursula who actually loves you
>her father owns the building (in NYC) which means he owns a property worth millions
>he can let you stay rent free (in NYC) for the rest of your life
Peter was legit moronic
Imagine the ditkovichs as your in laws, a nightmare. And pete would have 10 potato Black person kids running around within a year. Sounds horrible
He was a good man, letting Peter stay even when he didn't paid his rent
That’s pirogiBlack folk and with 10 of them, he have his very own superhero team.
It’d be kinda awkward seeing your FIL hauled away by The Hague for crimes against humanity in Bosnia
>Mr Ditkovitch was an ex-KGB agent who liquidated state assets during the collapse of the USSR and used them to buy an entire building in NYC.
If you KNOW you're a loser, you should never go out with a girl who likes you for "who you are". Never.
Wdym?
Why?
Because a woman who dates losers is a ticking time bomb
>erm, why did he choose the cute redhead over DJ Qualls?
bizarre
smeagol lookin' b***h
enough with the anti-semitism
i don't know who semitism is
i said smeagol
I hate MJ with a passion. This Peter Black person fights super powered and enhanced criminals, he could punch through your fricking skull, b***h and what do you do???
You fricking cuck him over and over again YOU FRICKING SLAVIC LOOKING BLOATED UGLY b***h
>why didn't a teenager struggling for money frick his landlord's daughter
Ditkovich liked Peter. He would probably be ok with it as long as he treated his daughter right. Peter is also a nerd homebody who doesn't drink, has a job at a major newspaper and is getting a stem degree so he's like a 10/10 in slavistan.
and she was cuter than mary jane
10/10 would breed
BDH looks perpetually middle aged. The Katy Perry of acting.
Post the current year picture.
the office girl was 100x hotter
This.
The one that wouldn't pay because the pizzas were a minute late despite it being no skin off her bones? Not like she bought all those pizzas with her own money. She was trying to hoard her corporate master's shekels for him. Peter knew she was israeli and would never have anything to do with her.
the OP girl is literally israeli
you mean betty brant
Zoomers may not realize this, but there has been extreme hoeflation. She was like a 6/10 when this movie came out but she would be a 10/10 today
This is a photo of me in 2006.
You were pretty cute then, how've you been since?
happy birthday to you
OH NO NO NO NO NO NO HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>knot looks like a bonuh
Filmmaking!
Pretty big ass for a skinny girl.
imagine the sweaty awkward apartment sex. you just know she would let him raw dog
Imagine slamming into that 90 pounder while she giggles awkwardly and tries to act “sexy” the way a 1st generation immigrant girl who only knows about sex from fanfiction knows how
HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG
She's the big mac to MJs loaf of bread and some roast beef or cheese which you will probably enjoy more.
jew
Cute but too skinny
Cute and the perfect amount of skinny
>no breasts
>no ass
>b-but she was nice a couple times
Homos
Is that her?
>neurons: activated
God almighty I love me a good shapely tummy.
URSULA > MJ
Mary Jane x Peter is probably the most famous relationship in comic books, and it’s literally just
>beta male simping for the local cumsock wannabe celeb bop for years and “bagging” her when she’s used up
I'm not the hugest comic book reader, but isn't their relationship as shallow as can be?
Literally “she’s purty and lived next door to me”. Gwen had actual personality.
>bop
Why are people using this word suddenly to describe promiscuous women. It's from such a long time ago, like simp. Do zoomies just carry around a book of old timey slang and then pick a random page and put it in a hip hop song on a tiktok?
Get off the internet, unc
Simp is an old timey word?
Not that I know of, but "simpering" is an actual adjective, from which "simp" is derived.
t. not that anon
Anons, marry someone who loves you, not someone you love.
>dude just spend your life with someone you don't actually like lmao
No? Why the frick would I do that?
The happiest, strongest, and longest lasting relationships are between a woman who is absolutely in LOVE with a man, and a man who thinks she’s frickable and just pleasant enough to be around.
A man who chases a woman will never succeed.
A man and woman who chase each other will never succeed.
A woman who chases a man and a man who tolerates her is the closest thing to true love like in a sappy movie that it can come.
This but i do think that 'just toleranting' is a bit harsh
people and long marriages back then weren't exactly madly in love but they sure didn't just 'tolerate' each other
>people and long marriages back then weren't exactly madly in love but they sure didn't just 'tolerate' each other
Human relationships are built on necessity. When two people genuinely depend on each other an instinctual stockholm syndrome bonds them tight. That's just tribal shit. We're designed to live in communities where we genuinely depend on those closest to us for survival.
Before they could rely on big daddy government to service their every need (at mens' expense), a woman NEEDED her man. Her instincts made her love him.
Military camaraderie might be the only version of this phenomenon that still exists.
Sad but true. I used to chase girls like I was Mordecai or some shit, and I knew they were giggling about it to their friends and to the dudes they actually wanted. So I stopped chasing. My now-wife would never get out of my face or stop messaging me and I found her a bit annoying until we hooked up, and she was actually pretty chill.
Low self-esteem dorks suffering from oneitis don't make rational decisions when it comes to women.
she looks like an anorexic stick and her face is fricking round and weird looking
Because Parker's a titman.
Yes
KD is a goddess
>You want door fix, Man of Spiders? Yes, I know these things you do, I learn how to find many secrets in old country. You will not pay rent? This is fair. We will take rent in other ways. When I was in old country, in Bosnia, my friends and I... we do things to women. Terrible things, make them ugly women who will never be loved. Your friends, redhead girl and science girl... they will beg me to stop, as my men and I rain alternating blows of ejaculateing and fists upon them. And when they are broken, Man of Spiders, when they are nothing more than shells... you will know the rent is paid.
>For this month
For those who want to be part of this epic Cinemaphile forced meme there are three easy steps.
Step 1: This is considered the most important step. See what movie this epic Cinemaphile meme is being applied to today. Most of the time it's the older Sam Raimi Spiderman movies but since these threads die very fast the guys that force this apply it to other movies now. This thread however uses the Raimi Spiderman meme. Please pay attention.
Step 2: Take an iconic scene in the movie, any will do as long as people remember the scene. Greentext a quote from the scene and twist the words to use anti semitisim, racism, homophobia or any other edgy as frick topic. Go nuts, the sky is the limit! The more vulgar it is the more epic the meme is. This takes us to the final step.....
Step 3: Make a regular post, taking the position of a normal person and pretend to be disgusted by that scene. I know, I know, this is Cinemaphile, a site where gore flows like fine wine but that's what makes this meme edgy, wacky and zany. We pretend to be offended by that fake scene. Funny huh?
Now that you understand how to do this, have fun kids. Happy memeing!
>"You know, Peter, with great power comes great responsibility. Rudyard Kipling called it "White Man's Burden." Myself, I just call it as I see it: the responsibility of the master to discipline the servant."
>Ben looks directly at the camera.
>"The Black folk, the spics, the chinks...It's our responsibility to civilize them. And if we can't? Then they shall dangle from the elm tree. The Day of the Rope is near, Pete. We'll have every Black person in this country dead or in chains in 10 years, God bless the American Nazi Party."
She was literally a plant by the landlord to spy on him and weaken his defenses.
The landlord demanded rent and he used his prostitute daughter to suck the currency directly from his webbed wiener.
>The landlord demanded rent and he used his prostitute daughter to suck the currency directly from his webbed wiener.
oh no i would hate that haha
>The landlord demanded rent and he used his prostitute daughter to suck the currency directly from his webbed wiener.
Ursula: "I brought you cake."
(Peter Parker eats the cake)
(Travels to J. Jonah Jameson's office in his Spider-Man costume)
(Pulls down his pants... Exposing his erect wiener)
Spider-Man: "You need pictures of me to sell your malingering newspaper stories, you shameless defamer..."
(Noisily ejaculates, as his dick shoots out web fluid, with a brief "TWWWWIPPP" noise)
Spider-Man: "That's your reward you big mouth. Gotta go, more cake's waiting for me."
(Leaps to ceiling, opens office window, pulls up pants, leaving a noticable tenting pole jutting in the clingy spandex tights. He exits as quietly as he came).
HERE'S YOUR NO-PRIZE REWARD KIDDOS!
"Unstable Molecules" fused to superhero costumes hard to destroy? A clever hyper-polymer created by Redd Richards as a mix of Platinum, Nylon, and Titanium fibers? NO! Not at all.
Unstable Molecule costumes popped up after ISSUE 4 of the Fantastic Four first run. What happened then, dear readers? That's right, we meet the mysterious morphing SKRULLS. Creatures which can simulate the texture, density, durability of rock, metal, water, plastic, and many things you cannot imagine. So did Reed Richards, the elastic super genius "create" unstable molecules from these Skull Costumes or Skrull DNA? NO! Such a source would be near impossible to fabricate with 1960's technology. But Reed Richards did have 4 hypnotized Skull Invaders fantastically mesmerized into believing they are simple cows. What's left over from cattle harvesting? Leather. Or in this case SKRULL SKIN LEATHER. A fantastic substance that can assume the density and shapes of anything you imagine, and after encountering the galactic invader Super-Skrull, there was clear indisputable truth that Skrull Flesh can withstand the rigors of the cosmic energy that gave our Fantastical Family their powers. All that's left was breeding more Skrull Cow Hybrids
The first time i saw this it legit took me like 5 min to get it. Then i realized the guy had cancer 🙁
Post the bridge mariage proposal one
>Daughter of a landlord (Peter is a working class man)
>She is really ugly
He did the right thing choosing MJ
MJ was hotter. Simple as.