Why didn't Jaime Lannister get one of these?

Pic related belonged to a real life 16th century knight. The fingers are held in place by ratchets so they can hold a pose and grip objects.
>inb4 they don't have the technology
Joffrey has a gaffe lever crossbow with what looks like a rolling nut mechanism. This is 16th century level engineering.
The Lannisters have enough gold to hire the greatest blacksmiths in the world, but somehow it never occurred to them that they could strap a set of ratchets to a stump? At least Tyrion should have thought of this, given how much time he spent designing a special saddle for Bran.

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why did Jamie Lannister get vaxxed and fully boosted?

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    For combat I would give him this. A short one for self defence and a long one for battle. The gauntlet would have to be modified to hold a stump and he would have to adjust his fighting style, but it's completely feasible. Again, these are real life historic weapons used by real people in combat so we know they work.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They don't appear to have skipped any simple machines though. They understand basic mechanical principles (or at least their maesters and blacksmiths do). They also know how rich the Lannisters are, so they know Jaime can pay for the best tool they can come up with. He should have dozens of inventors lining up to sell him their ideas.

      IIRC in Feast for Crows—after Tywin’s death and funeral, Cersei orders Jamie to leave King’s Landing hastily so he can negotiate with the Blackfish who is holding Riverrun. Before he leaves, he asks a blacksmith to quickly make him a golden hand to replace his sword hand—which to me implies he is still prideful, not to mention still loyal to Cersei, despite having been somewhat humbled by the experience and his time with Brienne/Catelyn.
      In the show, Cersei orders the golden hand made for him (& Tyrion comments on it being “better than his old hand”). By that point in the show Jaime is more or less on his redemption arc, already at odds with Cersei. such an ostentatious, impractical, ineffective “gift” shows how out of touch she is. No emotional leveling (e.g. “I understand you losing your sword hand makes you feel like you’ve lost everything that makes you, you.”) just a quick-fix new hand that’s just for show, and solid gold only because he’s a Lannister, and gold’s their thing.
      TLDR I think the show handles this better, but it’s symbolic either way.

      There is no way Tywin would pay for it.
      Tywin's whole goal once Bobby B died was to get Jaime's dumbass back to Casterly Rock and father heirs.
      When Jaime had two hands he could stand with some of the best fighters in Westeros, and Robert loved humiliating both Jaime and Tywin by having Jaime under his thumb.
      Once Robert died, Tywin started coming up with a plan to get him away from the Kingsguard and back to Casterly Rock.
      The maiming of Jaime just added another excuse, which Jaime still tried to fight.
      It wasn't until the (pun intended) golden opportunity to rid himself of Tyrian and force Jaime through his love for his little brother to agree to returning to Casterly Rock that Tywin got his wish.
      Any possible thing that would give Jaime the chance to defy his father by still believing that he was a capable Kingsguard would not have been allowed.
      Had Bronn not been discreet, or in the books Ser Ilyn mute and willing to talk, they too would have been targets for Tywin to remove to further his plans.
      Or,maybe, I'm an idiot and attributing too much cleverness to Tywin.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        He did give him a Valyrian steel sword, although he'll have to use it left handed now. If we assume he's incredibly clever he might be trying to embarrass Jaime with the irony of finally having the best sword in the world and no right hand to wield it, further discouraging him from remaining in the king's guard.
        In any case, I don't think cost is the limiting factor. Cersei already gave him a gold hand and Tyrion has enough coin to pay Bronn to help him train his left. I don't know what a king's guard's wage is, but I'm sure he has some funds of his own as well. Jaime may not be able to raise armies without Tywin's help, but I'm sure he can hire a few blacksmiths.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          NTA but the crown is basically on its last financial legs. And Tywin was never forthcoming on forgiving the crown's debts.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Indians aren’t people and they lost to literally everyone who ever invaded them. So no they didn’t work and they weren’t used by real people.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Don't you have to grasp these? I guess they could wedge it on somehow with padding to protect the nub

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    There are cultures that somehow managed to reach a fairly high tech level while skipping the wheel so I would say it's not that far fetched to lack something like that despite the crossbow

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They don't appear to have skipped any simple machines though. They understand basic mechanical principles (or at least their maesters and blacksmiths do). They also know how rich the Lannisters are, so they know Jaime can pay for the best tool they can come up with. He should have dozens of inventors lining up to sell him their ideas.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >There are cultures that somehow managed to reach a fairly high tech level while skipping the wheel
      that's just plain not true
      I know you're talking about mesoamerica but they could make wheels and understood that things rolled, wheeled carts were just useless in a landscape that was 75% rainforest 25% mountain

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Furthermore they hadn't tamed any animals to actually be decent at pulling carts so on it's own a cart was of little use

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah, if it was a matter of just not inventing the wheel then they would have started having Alpacas pulling carts right after the Spanish arrived, instead they continued loading them with lighter saddlebags. Like how the Plains Indians completely reworked their whole way of life and creation myth after horses introduced by the Spanish reached them, because the "tech" was so superior for their biome that they couldn't even fathom living without them within a generation or two. Suddenly they could ride up to bisons and shoot them with arrows or spear them and actually penetrate deep enough to kill them, instead of having to risk their life while hunting them by getting close on foot or scare a whole herd off a shallow cliff.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >they hadn't tamed any animals to actually be decent at pulling carts
          Did they not have humans?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >these slave empires didn’t have any beasts of burden
          Anon, a wheelbarrow can make one slave a lot more efficient. They didn’t have these things because they did not conceive of them.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            A human carting a wheelbarrow full of shit up a mountain is in fact NOT more effective than saddlebags on alpacas.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            to be fair wheelbarrows were invented in china 3000 years after the discovery of the wheel and Europe started using them only in the middle ages

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Europeans used them. Indios didn't have horses or donkeys. Or of course wheels. They definitely could have done with wheelbarrows though.

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Dorschmied sounds like he FRICKED

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Are you talking about the knight or the blacksmith? The knight's name was Götz von Berlichingen. Dorfschmied refers to the maker of the hand (Erste Hand vom Dorfschmied = First Hand from the Blacksmith).
      Berlichingen is indeed confirmed to have fricked, having fathered 10 children. As for the blacksmith AFAIK there were two of them. The first hand was made by a local man shortly after the hand-removing battle took place and the second was specially commissioned from someone else later on.

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    IIRC in Feast for Crows—after Tywin’s death and funeral, Cersei orders Jamie to leave King’s Landing hastily so he can negotiate with the Blackfish who is holding Riverrun. Before he leaves, he asks a blacksmith to quickly make him a golden hand to replace his sword hand—which to me implies he is still prideful, not to mention still loyal to Cersei, despite having been somewhat humbled by the experience and his time with Brienne/Catelyn.
    In the show, Cersei orders the golden hand made for him (& Tyrion comments on it being “better than his old hand”). By that point in the show Jaime is more or less on his redemption arc, already at odds with Cersei. such an ostentatious, impractical, ineffective “gift” shows how out of touch she is. No emotional leveling (e.g. “I understand you losing your sword hand makes you feel like you’ve lost everything that makes you, you.”) just a quick-fix new hand that’s just for show, and solid gold only because he’s a Lannister, and gold’s their thing.
    TLDR I think the show handles this better, but it’s symbolic either way.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Cersei just wanted to get diddled by gold fingers, dirty bawd that she is.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You just know she had the israeliteellers make something incredibly fancy for those lonely nights. Only gold will do for a Lannister.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >implying you need a dildo when you have Lancel and Osmund Kettleblack and probably Moon Boy for all I know

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >"I spent days with the blacksmith getting the details just right."
        Always wondered what details she was referring to, given that the result is just a metal hand with slightly curled fingers. You just brought new meaning to it.

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    why are the hilts of their swords cross shaped if christianity doesn't exist?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      .... Do you think swords only look like that because of Christianity?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        They also like assuming swords are dickshaped. ~~*Historians*~~ are moronic.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I distinctly remember being in a museum in Scotland and seeing some ancient sworts and hilts that were wiener shaped, something to do with them believing wieners kept evil spirits away. Anyway, I tried looking for a picture of one but all I could find was strange looking porn.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's a functional design. Crossguards exist on pre-Christian swords.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        not like the medieval versions

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    He did, it sucks

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Jaime was too prideful to take up the sword with that hand. It hurt him too much that he would have gone from the best swordfighter in the land to someone who can hardly deal with a random peasant, while those people would get to talk about having fought Jamie Lannister while acting as if his fancy mechanical hand made it so that there was no disadvantage on his part. Fighting them left-handed at least means they can't brag.

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why didn't Jaime Lannister get one of these?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      wouldn't hot bullet casing fly out and hit him in the face each time he fired a shot? I don't recall which hand he lost

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What a shitty gilding job. This is what he should have got, loading the buckshot barrel with dragonglass shards.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What a shitty gilding job. This is what he should have got, loading the buckshot barrel with dragonglass shards.

      It's probably a bit beyond their technology, given that their only known explosive is a liquid. They could probably manage a simple cannon though, if anyone thought to put wildfire in a tube.

      wouldn't hot bullet casing fly out and hit him in the face each time he fired a shot? I don't recall which hand he lost

      He lost his right hand, so he'd have to shoot with his left. On a Lannister budget you could always have a left-handed ejector custom made. The main problem is not having access to gunpowder in the first place.

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why did they cut Jaime's actual beginnings of redeeming himself in the Riverlands in favour of that stupid shit in Dorne?

    When you read his chapters, it all sounds like the sort of stuff that DD would love to throw at the screen.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Riverlands chapters are all politics and introspection. They didn't want to write politics any more because that takes time, so does introspection and character growth. It's much easier to write "and then they walk across some dunes until they come across some sand snakes. They fight. Have them improvise some whip action on the day, it'll turn out fine I'm sure. Later they're in some cells and one of the women shows her boobs while talking about bad pussy." and things of that nature.

      Early on we used to think D&D wrote plotdumps in brothels because they thought the audience wouldn't pay attention if there weren't some breasts on screen but the truth was that THEY couldn't be bothered to write it without the promise of seeing some breasts and sex at the end. When they could no longer have random brothel scenes they instead cut down on the politics.

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    He should have gotten a gauntlet-mounted axe. It would be both offense and defense, basically a shield that you can’t drop.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Shagga would respect that. Could help with the Stone Crows.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I didn't watch the show after season 2, but he was dreaming of having a golden hand and going by the moniker "Goldenhands" in the book

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Joffrey has a gaffe lever crossbow with what looks like a rolling nut mechanism. This is 16th century level engineering.

    chinese had gunpower before europeans did

    history doesn't matter

    it never did.

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