why isn't there much kino set on modern day cruise ships?

why isn't there much kino set on modern day cruise ships? they're like self contained floating cities , with the added drama element of being stranded on the water they would be great for a horror movie.

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Poseidon Adventure remake flopped and cruise ships are for actual boomers who can't afford a yacht.

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Ghost Ship
    >The Haunting of Mary Celeste
    >Triangle
    >Deep Rising
    You really never seen these OP?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      OP needs to watch the opening scene of Ghost Ship

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Deep Rising is great fun

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Ghost Ship’s holographic DVD cover is cool

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Cruise ships have turned super ghetto now. It’s like going to the Rio casino in Vegas, it’s a disgusting nightmare.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      There are tiers of cruises, and Carnival is a low one. The higher tier ones (eg Regent) are occupied entirely by wealthy boomers--many are fat

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Carnival is indeed the party Black person tier cruise.
        A step up is royal carribean
        At the top is probably Disney

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I recently went on Norweigan Cruise in Europe and it was repulsively fat americans, most of which didn't even get off at any of the destinations

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Cruise ships have turned super ghetto now. It’s like going to the Rio casino in Vegas, it’s a disgusting nightmare.

      passenger to crew ratio is still the gold standard for determining what quality of service you are going to get.

      I've gone on a number of cruises during COVID and I've had a great time. It really wasn't realistic to travel outside the country.

      Personally I prefer the Junior Suites on the mid sized Holland America Line.

  4. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Oldie, but goodie

  5. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    SPEED 2

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Was going to say, I think this ruined that idea for most people

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, cruise ships aren’t know for their speed. lol.

        I bet it was an existing script they had just lying around and they just repurposed it for a quicky sequel. Who wants to spend time writing an actually good script in Hollywood, right?

  6. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Death Ship

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >CHUH
      >CHUH
      >CHUH

  7. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    *ahem*

  8. 2 years ago
    Anonymous
    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >the banana blowjob scene

      Teen hard-on kino

  9. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    An entry in the Scream series would be good on a cruise ship.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >sydney and her friends are on a multi stop cruise
      >each city they stop in ghostface seems to attack
      >she thinks its one of the crew
      >turns out there is a different ghostface in each city, all of them separately (or maybe coordinatng) trying to whack sidney prescott

      something like that

  10. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Wow. Imagine all the seafood and champagne laden diarrhea this thing dumps into the sea every hour.

  11. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Maritime anon here, just quit my pseudo-military job to work on a riverboat cruise line
    AMA about why major cruise lines are fricked and I will answer, both as a passenger on many and as an industry insider

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Why are major cruise lines fricked?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >AMA
      What's the wettest you've ever been?

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Took a walk while in port in Japan during a typhoon

        Why are major cruise lines fricked?

        Humans are the worst cargo. Specifically, Americans are the worst cargo. If you go on a cruise line during any major holiday, you will be experiencing an entire ship full of drunkards. You’ll have to listen to a drunk grandmother scream at you that her grandson (who has never had alcohol before but is of legal age to drink at sea) has “fallen overboard”. You’ll have to wake up the captain because he has to know about a potential MOB. He already hates you because he’s likely a stuck up greek or Turk who’s only working on a cruise ship to molest the blonde Norwegian female mate and make her life a living hell when she refuses to suck you off. So you call him and he screams at you and then you have to turn the ship around and waste precious time trying to find this guy (and you will NEVER find a man overboard unless you witness them fall and can immediately turn around while someone keeps their eye on him)
        Of course, after two hours you’ll find the drunk child passed out in the woman’s restroom. Great, now you only have to deal with the dozen other missing passengers or drunk fights. All the while you have to deal with a crew from a dozen different countries who all hate each other and speak they bare minimum of English (and you are supposed to know English as maritime law demands it for licensed bigwigs, yeah fricking right)
        And as soon as you get into port you need to tie up the ship. Since cruise lines are fricking massive and your captain is a drunk greek frick, this always involves accidents such as the degloving of hands and the destruction of piers.
        The only plus of being a mate on a cruise ship is that all the third world entry level women want to frick you so they can sleep in your room and not the slave quarters

        What exactly do you do there? Are the money good?

        I am a third mate. Basically I maintain safety stuff and for eight hours a day I am on the bridge running everything. The money is ridiculous (1/2)

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          What exactly do you do there? Are the money good?

          The money is ridiculous, considering I work only half a year. $600 a day and you save so much of it since the ship is paying for room and board for the half of the year you’re there. If you sail and spend a few years with the parents you can save enough to buy a great home

          realistically how easy could someone get away with a murder aboard one of these vessels

          Well when I was pseudo military, meaning I was a civvie on a civvie run navy ship, the entry level positions were always filled by inner city blacks and third world Filipinos. They would ape out all the time and it was common for them to stab shipmates with knives and suffer zero repercussions. Even easier on a cruise ship. All you need to do is get some poor c**t drunk out of his mind, find one of the many empty places outside the skin of the shit at 3 AM, and let him go over

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            How long and how difficult was it to get into it?

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Military sealift command will hire anyone with a pulse. If you are white and have a mediocre work ethic, you can advance fast. Once you have a position you’re comfortable with, leave MSC for anywhere else. Join a Union or something. From there on out you’re set. If you want to start higher up the foods chain, go to one of the maritime academies and start off as a licensed engineer or mate (basically white collar). I recommend going to the maritime general on /n/ and reading the sticky.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Are you out right now? Do you guys have decent internet?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                No I’m drunk at home. Deep sea all you have is ship computers with ass internet and basic email capabilities. Rivers and inland, you get signal

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Damn, that sounds terrible. You like Deep Rising?

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Haven’t seen it
                It’s not bad. My laptop is loaded with games and shows and I have like, 300 books on my e-reader. It’s nice to take a break from Cinemaphile and be forced to read for a while

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                You should check it out, a classic cruise ship horror you might like.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Thanks, favorites for me are Master and Commander and Deepwater Horizon, not a boatkino but close enough

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              You can also walk down to your local Seafarers' International Union/Sailors' Union of the Pacific/etc. SIU will send you to their academy on a contract

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                very interesting, hadn't heard of them, thanks

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      What exactly do you do there? Are the money good?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      realistically how easy could someone get away with a murder aboard one of these vessels

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        You mean cruises? I would imagine impossible. There are cameras virtually everywhere, motion sensors that detect “bodies” falling over board, and you’re never almost a couple yards from another person always (unless you’re in your room, which at that point gg)

  12. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >why aren’t cruises shown more in movies
    Cruises are degenerate “holidays” for people who hate travelling. They’re also some of the most unhygienic things in existence with an end result always being sick from being on a boat with 3k other people for 7-14 days. Also the zog virus basically put the industry on the brink

  13. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    last thing I remembered that involved a cruise ship was sweet life on deck

  14. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Because they're full of boring boomers doing boring boomer shit

  15. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >why isn't there much kino set on modern day cruise ships?
    Not modern day, but the old tv show Love Boat is kino

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous
      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I absolutely love and respect the off the charts amounts of autism and time it took for someone to make this.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          It's a who's who of tv actors of the 70s

  16. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Willingly stranding yourself on a ship with a ton of strangers is my version of hell. I will never, ever get on a cruise ship. Only absolute morons think this is fun.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      horror movie idea: someone like you wakes up on a cruise ship, goes mad and starts serial killing.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      You live under the false idea that living in a city is any different, just because... you can drive away or something? You've never been to one, you're highly exaggerating it.

      If you think "hell" would be being in a fricking cruise ship with some people, I don't know what to tell you, you sound like a massive moron. Pretty sure being in some african raided city or some Ukraine shelled town would be way worse... buh uhh.. what do I know?

      Use your words better homosexual. Your version of hell is literally and unironically the most stupid thing I've heard

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Have sex incel

  17. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    for me its the negress who launched herself overboard after a brawl. another Black personing on a carnival cruise.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Sauce me

  18. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

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