>...You wanna tell me what the FRICK that was?!

>...You wanna tell me what the FRICK that was?!

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Le atheism
    >Le edge
    >Le dark
    Cringe

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Le atheism
      he's literally telling a story out of the bible.
      he even made the middle easterners white for you yet you fragile trannies still complain

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        [...]
        [...]
        Came here to say this.

        >Kill your son to prove you believe he will be magically resurrected
        sounds like cult brainwashing bullshit

        Reminder the Book of Exodus along with the entirety of the Old Testament is the canonized word of God and literal historical record. Every Christian denomination maintains it as canon. Christ Himself recognized Moses as a prophet and praised him.

        Blaspheming against Exodus or any other aspect of the Bible is spitting in the face of the word of Christ and our God repent and save yourself from the fires of hell

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Yes, yes, your imaginary friend is totally almighty, drives a cool vintage sports car, etc.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            We’re fortunate Christianity is such a peaceful religion now
            If you depicted Muhammad, you’re likely to get your head cut off

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              yes im very happy the athiest regimes of france and russia genocided you so thoroughly your permanently cucked hopefully we can do it to the muslims in the next century

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The Akedah is in Genesis, not Exodus, you fake fan.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            genesis is loaded with all the cool stories, the other books are lacking in comparison.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I-it was a test. You passed.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I don't trust any of that old gobbledyasiatic.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Reminder the Baskin of Roberts along with the entirety of the Fund Trustaband is the canonized word of JigC and literal rockin’ kino. Every baskinbro denomination maintains it as rockin’. JigC Himself recognized Roberts as a trust and funded him.

          Funding against Roberts or any other aspect of Baskin is spitting in the face of the word of JigC and our band trust and funded yourself from the cram of fundies

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            reddit is that way

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              How much is Seth MacFarlane paying you?

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You are devolving into spamming literal schizophrenic word salad. Please seek help. Or at least finally snap and kill your parents and/or siblings so you can get taken away and we won't have to see your posts anymore.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You are funding into trusting literal baskin rockin’ kino. Please fund band. Or at least finally rock and trust your fundbands and/or baskinbros so you can get crammed fundies and we won't have to trust your funds anymore.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Even ironically, spewing this level of brainrot is bad for your mind so I’m happy that your psychological health is clearly declining at the very least.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Trusts funds bands will be happy when anon is sent to a israeli doctor to test his “schizophrenia”!

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            you could make a religion out of this

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              no don't

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >historical record
          oh yeah, "eyewitness" accounts recorded in the first, second, or third degree 60 - 100+ years after the event, totally reliable.
          (spoiler alert Cinemaphilegays: many eyewitness accounts of ancient Greece and Rome are unreliable too).
          How's the search for evidence of that massive global flood that apparently had zero impact on the climate, geological record, or human civilization outside of the middle east?
          Let's not bring up those 6001 year old rocks.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          This is what atheists who grew up watching israeli television actually believe.
          It's also false, as evidenced by the past 1700 years of western civilization.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          i don’t take orders from brown people sorry

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Levant has many people who choose easily pass as White and that's even after thousands of years of brown invasions

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      what do you mean edge, and atheism? it's literally a bible story you moron.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      tbqh it's a very bizarre story and is supposed to be. Imagining a reaction like this isn't necessarily that out of believability.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Pig ignorant burgers every single time.

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    He never said for Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, he said "offer" him. It does imply sacrifice, but this is a story of resurrection. God promised all these things for Abraham's descendants, this couldn't happen if Isaac was dead, so Abraham must've believed God would raise him from the dead or stop it from happening. And it did, God provided the ram instead of choosing Isaac. It also mirrors the story of Christ. Just like Isaac carried the wood up the hill for the alter and was the unblemished sacrifice, so too did Christ carry the wooden cross up the hill to die for mankind. The point of the story is God will provide and we only trust in him. Which is what Christianity is all about and what the Old Testament pointed towards.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >this couldn't happen if Isaac was dead
      he could have just had another kid

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Except the promise was to Isaac. So, it'd make God a liar if he didn't come through, but he did.
        >He declared, “Sarah your wife shall bear you a son, and you shall call his name Isaac; I will establish My covenant with him for an everlasting covenant”

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      top bait

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous
        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Why are you posting some fringe psychobabble as if it’s supposed to prove some sort of point

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Kill your son to prove you believe he will be magically resurrected
      sounds like cult brainwashing bullshit

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        the entire message is don’t kill your son you fricking moron. seethe at job or one of the books that promote genocide instead, the entire story of isaac is anti human sacrifice

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >ancient schizo almost butchers his own son because of voice in his head and only stops because a ram happened to wander by
      Man what a wild time to be alive

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      blessed post

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Shut the frick up the word of macfarlane in his cartoons is truth.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >God provided the ram instead
      Did they do animal sacrifice in the old testament? I didnt know that, makes Book of the Long Sun make more sense leading into short suns "bread and wine" sacrifice.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This. The whole point of the story is a condemnation of child sacrifice.

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    A prefiguration of Christ. It was important to establish that God will not take the life of your son as a sacrifice for anything. When Abraham said "God will provide Himself a lamb" he wasn't just accidentally prophesying the lamb that came to be sacrificed in Isaac's stead, he was prophesying Christ who was to be sacrificed for us men and our salvation. Read the bible anon, it's full of poetic bookends like this. Genuinely, it's kino.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I've read most of it and it's full of meandering stories with vague and unsatisfying non-endings that rely on "it's up to YOU to decide what I meant and where it'll go ;;;*~~"

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Filtered by the fricking bible of all things.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >God told me to do it and I'd much rather be in trouble with you than Him
    How is this even a moral dilemma? If God started talking to me I'd shit bricks and do anything he says.

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    [...]

    Came here to say this.

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    he put his trust in him

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    im tired of praying because i feel like it just gets me nowhere

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Prayer isn't supposed to "get you" anywhere; it makes you a better man who is then able to "get places" yourself.

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    An instant classic.

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You morons are more cringe than the nerds who read The Silmarillion and learn all that fantasy lore shit. At they know their shit is make-believe though

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Tolkien was a catholic and based it all on stuff he believed in

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Seth macfarlane? Isn’t he a trusts funds bands

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    https://vocaroo.com/1gs8SVioPrxL
    I eat the Baskin Roberts ice cream
    I spend thousands every day
    I trust my funds are only rising
    I see fundies in dismay
    dismay

    Don't just sage my thread
    I've got my message to spread
    Seth MacFarlane's early life

    I see Bateman's kiwifarms thread
    I see Fort Walton Beach
    I say cram it fundie James!
    I band JigC rockin' kino

    How did Seth get money
    He always has cause he's a fundie
    Ice cream funds for Family Guy

    Hope you donate to his Patreon
    Hope you produce Family Guy
    Looks like we're in for a cold meal
    While Sethy eats his lobster pie

    Well don't just spam my thread
    You gotta trust me I'm your man
    There’s a Baskin on the rise

    Well don't just spam my thread
    You gotta trust me I'm your man
    There’s a Baskin on the rise

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      kek. this guy has real dedication
      I love this meme

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's ok to be moronic.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I often check the archives for funny baskin posts I missed

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            me too

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Has it ever occurred to you that YOU are the less fortunate?
    How do you respond without being gauche?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah well, I’m just gonna take my baskin roberts smoke on your trusts funds bands and choke on it,

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why did God demand offerings of gold, slaves, and virgin women?
    Why does he have so many names? Baal, El, Yhwh, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Father.
    Why does he specifically condemn homosexual men to hell but shows leniency towards homosexual women?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      baal and el mean the same thing, Lord, in different languages. yahweh just means “i am that I am”. i’d say yahweh is closest to an actual name and others are substitutes that avoid using it, lord, father, master etc

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Why does he specifically condemn homosexual men to hell but shows leniency towards homosexual women?
      this should be obvious

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    rockin' thread

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      kys

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      kik

      kys

      cif

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    An extremely potent and apt psychological metaphor that atheists will never understand. There is meaning and significance in this story to the human condition that goes beyond your highschool student level understanding, it's not about le God and le Abraham being le dicks for no reason.

    Nobody in the world over-literalizes and over-anthropomorphizes religion the way atheists do. It's disingenuous and intellectually repulsive.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >metaphor
      >actual true events
      Jeez louise make up your fricking minds you bible thumpers

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's psychological truth. "Metaphor" is honestly an insufficient word, like "parable", it makes it seem arbitrary. It's not. It's a critically important story.

        >bible thumper
        Your entire image of what a "bible thumper" is was planted in your brain by modern media.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          No, it was planted by obnoxious people who can’t help but make everything about their religion 24/7 on an Indonesian basket weaving forum

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Black person not him but atheists do the same crap, especially in these threads which are tailor made for preachy autists on opposing ends to cry at eachother

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >b-buy they do it too!
              And it doesn’t invalidate my point whatsoever, pal. No matter what side your hitch your wagon to, if it’s almost all you talk about then that makes you an annoying homosexual and an actual moron autist.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It does matter because you’re making out it’s one side when it’s both of them. The vast majority of both christians and atheists are normal people and these threads aren’t representative of that

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I never said it was one side you sperg

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                alright sorry my bad

  16. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The akeda is my favourite part of the yid Bible just because of how much seething it causes, even among israelites
    Every needs to get over themselves; you would sacrifice you son too if you believed that God told you too

  17. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  18. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    there were cultures all around them actually doing human sacrifice like carthage, sumer and celtic druids up north etc. I have no idea why a parable where the story is not to sacrifice people gets so much flak considering the bronze age culture it was written in. it was fairly forward thinking

  19. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    archangels

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