>Sauron has returned? >I must consult with my trusted friend and oldest ally Sauronsman at his home in Orctank at once >with luck I shall encounter no orcs
You cannot possibly expect me to believe this shit.
He meant it as in white light is the combination of all the colors in harmony such that no one color overpowers the others, but Saruman broke that light and shattered it into its constituent parts.
it was described as looking white from a distance and only upon close inspection could you notice the prismatic colors, think this picture does a good job because in the thumbnail it looks white, but when you open you see the prismatic effect. Its a symbol of his corruption. gays didn't even adopt the rainbow flag as their symbol for another 20 years after this was written.
>For I am Saruman the Wise, Saruman Ring-maker, Saruman of Many Colours!'
I looked then and saw that his robes, which had seemed white, were not so, but were woven of all colours, and if he moved they shimmered and changed hue so that the eye was bewildered.
I wish they'd kept a scene of this in the book, just maybe a subtle prism effect on Saruman's robes when Gandalf goes to visit him the first time would have been kino.
Well for one thing, multicolored =/= rainbow. It was supposed to be like one of those crazeh car paint jobs where the color seems to change depending on the angle, not just solid stripes. It's a magic cloak, not tie dye.
And secondly, it was a power move. Every wizard has a signature color, Wearing them all at once was like drinking their all their milkshakes at the same time.
The whole scene is stupid though, somehow they can talk to Saruman at the top of Isengard with normal volume speaking voices, somehow Legolas can fire an arrow near vertically all the way to the top of Isengard and hit grima an instant after it was fired. Also the stupid dragon ball Z fireball Saruman shoots at them and the dumb gratuitously violent death of getting impaled on a spike. Christopher lee deserved better than that absurd cartoony death, he shouldn’t have been cut either not closing off his arc was very unsatisfactory.
>somehow they can talk to Saruman at the top of Isengard with normal volume speaking voices
You could cope by saying that Gandalf and Saruman can communicate with their ultra powerful magic voices, but it still wouldn't explain how Saruman and Grima can hear Theoden for example.
>but it still wouldn't explain how Saruman and Grima can hear Theoden for example
How? Middle-Earth clearly has a magical version of "Divine Right to Rule" which suggest Theoden's bloodline is inherently magic
I had watched the extended version so many times I was actually shocked that Saruman just disappears from the story when I watched the theatrical release on TV last year.
They were right to cut the unintentionally funny death, but it should have been replaced with something else
Oh Saruman my dear fellow, I should think you take a break from roasting me and go enjoy a roast with your Orc friends for I hear you are much at one with their kind.
>Gandalf the Grey becomes Gandalf the White >"Mithrandir", and all of the other cool nicknames are no longer appliable
Only bad thing about the whole ordeal, tbh
>chastises Gandalf for smoking pipeweed >is actually jealous of how popular Gandalf is with the mortals and keeps a secret stash of pipeweed to emulate him in private
the chad Gandalf vs. the virgin Saruman
Needles would be the most common method.
I'm assuming you can pass it via period blood, though that would be quite rare.
A number have definitely got it from their weekly bash.
if 33% of pedophile rapists are queers, doesn't that just mean 67% of the rest are heterosexual pedophile rapists? Wouldn't that just mean you're likely to get raped by a straight person?
No, moron, it also said that 33% of pedophile rapists were homosexual. That still meant 67% of pedophile rapists were heterosexual. All pedophile rapists should burn in hell, but this is some "missing the forest for the trees" type shit. If queers are a tiny minority of this country, then you literally are more likely to get raped as a kid by a straight guy.
Black person we are discussing statistics of likelihood right now. This is why I hate these infographic posters who shit up threads with frivolous bullshit. They can't help themselves with posting off-topic shit that continuously ruins every fricking board on this site.
Never understood why they didn't shoot the ring into space or something, or throw it in a closer volcano
Or why didn't thet just kill Sauron outright? He's not invincible
They can't go into space, and the ring is impervious to all damage except being tossed into Mount Doom. In addition, Sauron doesn't need the ring, it's just that it would take him from overpowered to outright invincible
>Or why didn't thet just kill Sauron outright? He's not invincible
Yes he is. No matter how many times you defeat him, he'll just come back. And the might empires of old that could oppose him and win are long gone. Which is why he would have won eventually, no matter how many battles he lost, had they not destroyed the ring.
>They can't go into space
I know
But they surely can create some sort of magic to do it
>He's not invincible >Actually, yes he is
Make up your mind
Fly an eagle into him, or zap him with magic]
Done
He might be OP but if everyone grabbed him at once, he'd be done
Okay, but what IF he actually wins..? What are his motives. Surely, hes not just le ebin bad guy for the sake of just being a c**t, is he like Satan personified or will the world just turn into something like USSR, kinda shitty to live in, but its doable and he's doing it because he believes its the "greater good" or something
If he wins he rules over Middle Earth for all time, and there would be absolute order. So basically, China, but with a literal god for a communist party. Likely over time the orcs would outbreed people and then at some point Sauron gets bored and begins to suffer from his boredom (just as le heckin intended) and decides to try and go to Aman and is destroyed in the process
... and then those men who set foot on thr holy land who were frozen by Eru will be unfrozen, and put to work to breed elf babes until there are enough half-elfs to send back to middle earth and rebuild.
Read the fricking book, you disgusting secondary b***h.
The ring itself was made with a consciousness of it's own, and has bullshit probability-changing powers.
As long as it keeps existing, Sauron just needs to play the long game, until the ring gets a chance to set things in motion again.
Which is exactly what happened with the Isildur-Gollum-Bilbo chain of ownership.
In one part of the book, they discuss the possibility of just throwing the damn thing into the ocean, but the idea gets rejected precisely because of the luck-manipulation thing.
>In one part of the book, they discuss the possibility of just throwing the damn thing into the ocean, but the idea gets rejected precisely because of the luck-manipulation thing.
I know, that's moronic
but they never discuss shooting it into SPACE though, do they, moron?
Shoot it into space, and if it has bullshit probability changing powers, then it'll be far too late in the future for any of them to even care if it returns
or
Teleport it into the fricking volcano
sauron was literally on the cusp of conquering middle earth without the ring you moron. he didnt even need the ring on him. shooting it into space would have changed nothing
>This much D&D brainrot
Wizards in the Middle Earth setting are not as powerful as you think.
They can barely do basic b***h level things like setting stuff on fire, and even that gets limited use, because they received specific instructions about their "help the mortals" mission, you imbecile homosexual.
sauron was literally on the cusp of conquering middle earth without the ring you moron. he didnt even need the ring on him. shooting it into space would have changed nothing
Again, just jump him with 7-8 people
He's strong, but not 7-8 people strong
Why didn't Gandalf just set the ring on fire, then? >sauron was literally on the cusp of conquering middle earth without the ring
Yet they beat him without it just fine
funny how that works, huh?
they only won because god cheated and made gollum trip into the volcano
9 months ago
Anonymous
>cheated
he used his powers, Sauron's been using his powers the whole time. Don't like it? Should have been more powerful you spiky frick. Don't start shit if you don't want to get shit on.
No, because the ring it's also evil.
Kind of a shit comparison, but, remember that diary from Harry Potter, that housed a younger version of Voldemort inside of it?
It's KINDA similar.
GANDALF:
Saruman, stop this madness! Remember what we came here for! Return to your senses and come down from your tower!
SARUMAN:
Bah! The people of Middle Earth will never be free, whether its from the tyranny of Sauron or the tyranny of their fate! What difference does it make? A short life in servitude of a cruel master is all they will know anyway!
PIPPIN:
Gandalf? What does he mean?
GANDALF:
Silence, fool of a took! Saruman! I am warning you! Come down now, while you still can!
SARUMAN:
Warning me? Of what? Of the impotence of the elves and the valar? Of the illegitimacy of the dwarfs? Give this ranger of yours a kingdom, and watch it crumble under its own weight in but a few generations! Men can never be great, never again! Is this not the judgement of our Master?
GANDALF:
Sophistry and lies, Saruman!
SARUMAN:
I accept your concession, Gandalf the fool. Go then! Do your Master's bidding, and when you are done, you will leave this shores forever, escaping to blissful ignorance as all beauty and wisdom withers, and Men turn to each other like beasts, fighting over what little is left! Abandon this Earth, just as your Master has done!
>The Grey Thinks He Has One on Foxy Wizard, but He Fools Him
>Sauronman...
>works for SAURON????
>the related picture.....
>is in a SEPARATE post???????????
>Sauron has returned?
>I must consult with my trusted friend and oldest ally Sauronsman at his home in Orctank at once
>with luck I shall encounter no orcs
You cannot possibly expect me to believe this shit.
>Saruman turns evil
>switches from white to rainbow colored
What did Tolkien mean by this?
That's because rainbow color spectrum is associated with Christianity. "Saruman of Many Colours" implies he turned into a Christian nationalist
Nah I think it was just hybris. Like, having one color wasn't enough for him, he wanted all of them
He meant it as in white light is the combination of all the colors in harmony such that no one color overpowers the others, but Saruman broke that light and shattered it into its constituent parts.
it was described as looking white from a distance and only upon close inspection could you notice the prismatic colors, think this picture does a good job because in the thumbnail it looks white, but when you open you see the prismatic effect. Its a symbol of his corruption. gays didn't even adopt the rainbow flag as their symbol for another 20 years after this was written.
that's a cool illustration
>For I am Saruman the Wise, Saruman Ring-maker, Saruman of Many Colours!'
I looked then and saw that his robes, which had seemed white, were not so, but were woven of all colours, and if he moved they shimmered and changed hue so that the eye was bewildered.
I wish they'd kept a scene of this in the book, just maybe a subtle prism effect on Saruman's robes when Gandalf goes to visit him the first time would have been kino.
How do you respond without sounding mad?
"gg :)"
absolutely boilin and having a melty rn
As always, this was addressed in the books. Saruman reveals his cloak of many colors
and expects it to be a mic drop moment and Gandalf looks at him and says "I preferred white"
I thought he was just joking about the gay cloak.
Tolkien truly was ahead of his time.
Well for one thing, multicolored =/= rainbow. It was supposed to be like one of those crazeh car paint jobs where the color seems to change depending on the angle, not just solid stripes. It's a magic cloak, not tie dye.
And secondly, it was a power move. Every wizard has a signature color, Wearing them all at once was like drinking their all their milkshakes at the same time.
>Gandalf looks at him and says "I preferred white, like my b***hes"
>?
Saruman, your staff is broken.
Still can't believe PJ cut that scene out of the theatrical version.
Yea, to most people who watched these, Saruman just up and vanished never to be seen again
As much as I enjoy it in isolation, it really kills the pacing.
The whole scene is stupid though, somehow they can talk to Saruman at the top of Isengard with normal volume speaking voices, somehow Legolas can fire an arrow near vertically all the way to the top of Isengard and hit grima an instant after it was fired. Also the stupid dragon ball Z fireball Saruman shoots at them and the dumb gratuitously violent death of getting impaled on a spike. Christopher lee deserved better than that absurd cartoony death, he shouldn’t have been cut either not closing off his arc was very unsatisfactory.
>somehow they can talk to Saruman at the top of Isengard with normal volume speaking voices
You could cope by saying that Gandalf and Saruman can communicate with their ultra powerful magic voices, but it still wouldn't explain how Saruman and Grima can hear Theoden for example.
>but it still wouldn't explain how Saruman and Grima can hear Theoden for example
How? Middle-Earth clearly has a magical version of "Divine Right to Rule" which suggest Theoden's bloodline is inherently magic
I had watched the extended version so many times I was actually shocked that Saruman just disappears from the story when I watched the theatrical release on TV last year.
They were right to cut the unintentionally funny death, but it should have been replaced with something else
>”Gibbets and crows??!! Dotard!!”
SARUMAN THE SILLY
saruman? more like snore-i-am
Oh Saruman my dear fellow, I should think you take a break from roasting me and go enjoy a roast with your Orc friends for I hear you are much at one with their kind.
no u
>no, you are gandalf the fool
>Yes. My name is Gandalf the White. Your name is Gandalf the Fool.
>WELL THE JERK MERCHANT CALLED, HE'S RUNNING OUT OF YOU
Why are you pussies so fearful of "sounding mad"? Grow a pair, don't chop them off.
holy shit, seething lmao
yeah, and?
>Getting rid of these people here. First Mr. Mith... Mithran...
>Gandalf the Dead!
>*consultants laugh*
Saruman of Many-Insults strikes again.
>Boromir's horn was broken?
>BTFOTFO
T. FOOT BF
BRAVO TOLKIE BRAVO
>Gandalf the Grey becomes Gandalf the White
>"Mithrandir", and all of the other cool nicknames are no longer appliable
Only bad thing about the whole ordeal, tbh
>Gandalf the TOOL
KWAB
How do you respond to that without sounding mad?
I already made that regurgitated reddit post, homosexual
And unlike you, I got a decent amount of upvotes (You)'s
Got em
HACKSOOOOOON
Wtf was his issue?
>chastises Gandalf for smoking pipeweed
>is actually jealous of how popular Gandalf is with the mortals and keeps a secret stash of pipeweed to emulate him in private
the chad Gandalf vs. the virgin Saruman
>Gandalf the white? More like gandalf the chudcel incel nolife white supremacist loser lolololol #blacklivesmatter
SARUMAN THE WRINKLY
SARUMAN THE STIIIIIIIIINKY
*augh*
Saruman the homosexual!
how do lesbians give each other AIDS?
Needles would be the most common method.
I'm assuming you can pass it via period blood, though that would be quite rare.
A number have definitely got it from their weekly bash.
I've met several lesbians that will dip into the penis enjoyment.
Unless they're taking it up the ass from an aids dude I don't see how they'd get it.
Probably got it from a dude on the down ow
>me coming up with retorts in the shower, weeks after the actual argument occured
if 33% of pedophile rapists are queers, doesn't that just mean 67% of the rest are heterosexual pedophile rapists? Wouldn't that just mean you're likely to get raped by a straight person?
It says 33% admit to fricking minors, moron
No, moron, it also said that 33% of pedophile rapists were homosexual. That still meant 67% of pedophile rapists were heterosexual. All pedophile rapists should burn in hell, but this is some "missing the forest for the trees" type shit. If queers are a tiny minority of this country, then you literally are more likely to get raped as a kid by a straight guy.
>he can’t math
Black person we are discussing statistics of likelihood right now. This is why I hate these infographic posters who shit up threads with frivolous bullshit. They can't help themselves with posting off-topic shit that continuously ruins every fricking board on this site.
>ignore the massive over representation bigot
Never understood why they didn't shoot the ring into space or something, or throw it in a closer volcano
Or why didn't thet just kill Sauron outright? He's not invincible
They can't go into space, and the ring is impervious to all damage except being tossed into Mount Doom. In addition, Sauron doesn't need the ring, it's just that it would take him from overpowered to outright invincible
>Or why didn't thet just kill Sauron outright? He's not invincible
Yes he is. No matter how many times you defeat him, he'll just come back. And the might empires of old that could oppose him and win are long gone. Which is why he would have won eventually, no matter how many battles he lost, had they not destroyed the ring.
>They can't go into space
I know
But they surely can create some sort of magic to do it
>He's not invincible
>Actually, yes he is
Make up your mind
Fly an eagle into him, or zap him with magic]
Done
He might be OP but if everyone grabbed him at once, he'd be done
Okay, but what IF he actually wins..? What are his motives. Surely, hes not just le ebin bad guy for the sake of just being a c**t, is he like Satan personified or will the world just turn into something like USSR, kinda shitty to live in, but its doable and he's doing it because he believes its the "greater good" or something
If he wins he rules over Middle Earth for all time, and there would be absolute order. So basically, China, but with a literal god for a communist party. Likely over time the orcs would outbreed people and then at some point Sauron gets bored and begins to suffer from his boredom (just as le heckin intended) and decides to try and go to Aman and is destroyed in the process
... and then those men who set foot on thr holy land who were frozen by Eru will be unfrozen, and put to work to breed elf babes until there are enough half-elfs to send back to middle earth and rebuild.
Read the fricking book, you disgusting secondary b***h.
The ring itself was made with a consciousness of it's own, and has bullshit probability-changing powers.
As long as it keeps existing, Sauron just needs to play the long game, until the ring gets a chance to set things in motion again.
Which is exactly what happened with the Isildur-Gollum-Bilbo chain of ownership.
In one part of the book, they discuss the possibility of just throwing the damn thing into the ocean, but the idea gets rejected precisely because of the luck-manipulation thing.
>In one part of the book, they discuss the possibility of just throwing the damn thing into the ocean, but the idea gets rejected precisely because of the luck-manipulation thing.
I know, that's moronic
but they never discuss shooting it into SPACE though, do they, moron?
Shoot it into space, and if it has bullshit probability changing powers, then it'll be far too late in the future for any of them to even care if it returns
or
Teleport it into the fricking volcano
sauron was literally on the cusp of conquering middle earth without the ring you moron. he didnt even need the ring on him. shooting it into space would have changed nothing
>This much D&D brainrot
Wizards in the Middle Earth setting are not as powerful as you think.
They can barely do basic b***h level things like setting stuff on fire, and even that gets limited use, because they received specific instructions about their "help the mortals" mission, you imbecile homosexual.
Again, just jump him with 7-8 people
He's strong, but not 7-8 people strong
Why didn't Gandalf just set the ring on fire, then?
>sauron was literally on the cusp of conquering middle earth without the ring
Yet they beat him without it just fine
funny how that works, huh?
they only won because god cheated and made gollum trip into the volcano
>cheated
he used his powers, Sauron's been using his powers the whole time. Don't like it? Should have been more powerful you spiky frick. Don't start shit if you don't want to get shit on.
There is no space in middle earth.
If there are stars, there's space
>brainlet take
>The ring itself was made with a consciousness of it's own
Does that mean that technically, the ring could tell Sauron to frick off?
No, because the ring it's also evil.
Kind of a shit comparison, but, remember that diary from Harry Potter, that housed a younger version of Voldemort inside of it?
It's KINDA similar.
No the ring was him, he was bound to the mortal plane. Thats why it increased his powers when he wore it, it made him more mortal.
>shoot the ring into space or something
Were there rockets capable of escaping orbit just lying around somewhere?
>Gandalf the JERK STORE BEST SELLER
>put Seinfeld characters in any setting
>it somehow works
Saruman the Sharky
saruman the Black person
gandalfsisters, our response?!
Saruman the Small
Saruman the CHUD
Here is how the conversation should have gone:
GANDALF:
Saruman, stop this madness! Remember what we came here for! Return to your senses and come down from your tower!
SARUMAN:
Bah! The people of Middle Earth will never be free, whether its from the tyranny of Sauron or the tyranny of their fate! What difference does it make? A short life in servitude of a cruel master is all they will know anyway!
PIPPIN:
Gandalf? What does he mean?
GANDALF:
Silence, fool of a took! Saruman! I am warning you! Come down now, while you still can!
SARUMAN:
Warning me? Of what? Of the impotence of the elves and the valar? Of the illegitimacy of the dwarfs? Give this ranger of yours a kingdom, and watch it crumble under its own weight in but a few generations! Men can never be great, never again! Is this not the judgement of our Master?
GANDALF:
Sophistry and lies, Saruman!
SARUMAN:
I accept your concession, Gandalf the fool. Go then! Do your Master's bidding, and when you are done, you will leave this shores forever, escaping to blissful ignorance as all beauty and wisdom withers, and Men turn to each other like beasts, fighting over what little is left! Abandon this Earth, just as your Master has done!
(SARUMAN spits on the earth)
SARUMAN:
I curse thee, all-father!
(GANDALF backs away in terror and awe)
GANDALF:
C-come, let us be away from this place..
>mfw
>Gandalf the FOOL OF A TOOK
Grey Fool
I am Saruman of MANY GENDERS
Haha! Good one Sauron’s Man-I mean Saruman
sarusperson