Hey, wake up wake up wake up
(What?)
Hey, have you not heard the scuttlethump?
(Your thump?)
No, the gossip, the buzz
The who-said-what-who-does-that, yeah, the scuttlethump
Well, I was hopping through the grass and trees
An ear to the ground
Then I came hopping here for you to see
And hear what I found
Remember the thump?
Remember that shot from that Trump?
When I was like
"Womp chicka womp womp chicka womp woooomp"
>live action >will be almost entirely if not entirely CGI because why cast a hunter when you can just render one
I know its bascially just beung used as shorthand for "not drawn" but that shit triggers my tism like you wouldnt believe.
>AYO
*shits all over your lawn* >SO YOU BE SAYIN'
*smacks lips with a mouthful of grass* >WE WUZ DEER
*shoots out five babies* >'N SHEEEEIIIIIT
*jumps in front of a car and fricking dies*
Song of the South is like the most boringly wholesome shit ever that got memed into being Disney's Birth of a Nation by people who've never even fricking seen it.
This.
By all accounts and especially because it's based on a real person, Pocahontas is far more racist a movie. Yet somehow the notion of a fictional black man working on a post slavery planation singing a happy song once in his life, is tantamount to promoting Jim Crow laws.
>Song of the South is like the most boringly wholesome shit ever that got memed into being Disney's Birth of a Nation by people who've never even fricking seen it.
Yeah, every bit I've seen of it is just friendly and nice, you can even make a point to make it anti-racist, but somehow it's memed into being Disney's Mein Kampf.
That's what makes it funny. I'm old enough to have grown up watching SOTS before it got yeeted. I remember it being pleasant and recognizing the similarities of the magpies to the melanin enriched kids at school.
Birth of a Nation should get released, great movie with a valuable message.
Yeah, instead of getting shot Bambi's mother will OD on fenty after getting hooked on opoids because of over prescription. Modern day youth will love that
An evil redneck stereotype will be the villain.
A PoC will personal save Bambi from death.
Bambi will saw off his horns & pretend to be a doe
Interspecies gay skunk sex
Bahamian will found a communist party of the forest animals
Three hours of high quality pixar-grade animation of slender feminine anthro deer boys having hot sweaty moan-riddled gay sex in the grass, utilizing water physics from Elementals for the (many) cumshots.
How do you modernize a story about a deer in the fricking forest? It's already pretty much timeless. They are going to make Bambi's mom a super powerful girlboss who was just as powerful and cool as his dad and make global warming kill her.
Other than the strong heterosexual romance implied as the sole order of things, there’s not much to talk about here. The most important woman is never even named, and is killed off (Forcing a man into action… is this Disney’s first instance of fridging a woman? …probably not, but it’s something to thing about.) But I will mention a few things. First, even female animals are given makeup and curves? That’s just bizarre. And the women in this forest are INCREDIBLY aggressive sexually. The men all initially act like stereotypical “Girls are gross!” teens/preteens… and then are immediately seduced by some very aggressive women. (Flower, who honestly came off as feminine to me until they made his voice more masculine after he grew up, is kissed and goes stiff, being engorged with blood; Thumper gets slowly hip-swayed at by a lusty bunny; Bambi gets face-licked by Faline.) Bambi, of course, almost immediately gets into a fight with another man… either over Faline or just because men fight? Nature, man. We also have Faline being saved from dogs by Bambi, and this awkward thing where Bambi’s mom is shot and killed, and Bambi is ALSO shot… and walks it off because that’s a thing one can do with bullets? Oh, and once again, we see Disney having a thing for single motherhood… but unlike in Dumbo, we actually know the fate of Bambi’s dad… He’s alive! We see him! He talks! He’s the Great Prince of the Forest! And… he doesn’t help raise Bambi until Bambi’s mom dies… and there’s no reason given. What the hell, dad? But Bambi’s mom was doing a pretty great job, so good on her. Too bad dad showed up to teach his son how to shirk responsibility. Also it doesn't pass the Bechdel Test.
In the new adapted version, Bambi feels no remorse when his mom dies because "she used to gaslight me in a toxic upbringing anyway" and finds acceptance with his new adopted gay parents
I saw a baby deer dead on the side of the road today and I'm still upset about it. The poor thing was caked in mud and its head was half-submerged in a dirty puddle, all alone.
I'm sorry, anon. You can know nature is a vengeful c**t but sometimes when you see her handiwork, it does chafe a bit. You know the cure? Be kind to the next animal you meet.
The hunter who kills Bambi's mom will be dressed in full nazi regalia and say "heil hitler on behalf of all white people" before squeezing the trigger.
bambi gets new pronouns
Flower will be gay. If this is not the case dubs decides what I have to do
Flowers are gay though. They're all the same gender. Most also do beastiality and rape to reproduce.
>a modernized retelling
he's going to spend his youth on an iphone?
>calling flower male
xer's gentles natured and blushes sometimes xee's FRICKING TRANS you fricking BIGOT
>HE'S GOT EYELASHES AS WELL
I mean 'She' no i mean XER! have a nice day!
>have a nice day!
<3 and everybody did <3
<££ and businesses lived happily every after indoctrinating children <££
Bambi will now be a queer black Peta activist
Make Bambi and Ronno gay.
Bambi's a dude?
this
I always thought bambi was a girl
So you didn't watch the movie
How? Didn't they call him a prince all throughout the movie? Then he grew up into a buck at the end. I think dad calls him his son, too.
Cap. Bambi is a girl.
Bambi is a girl (male)
anyone who ever thinks this never watched the movie and only knew of it from the meme mother death scene
Um, yeah... they don't let girls be "King of the Jungle"
Make Bambi and Ronno gay.
This
What a rich and complex character trait.
and black, don't forget to make them talk like ghetto dwellers
i'm praying for cats 2
Bambi's mom gonna get shot by Donald Trump.
Kino
Hey, wake up wake up wake up
(What?)
Hey, have you not heard the scuttlethump?
(Your thump?)
No, the gossip, the buzz
The who-said-what-who-does-that, yeah, the scuttlethump
Well, I was hopping through the grass and trees
An ear to the ground
Then I came hopping here for you to see
And hear what I found
Remember the thump?
Remember that shot from that Trump?
When I was like
"Womp chicka womp womp chicka womp woooomp"
pop
MOMMY, BUTTFRICK ME
>Ok but you have to dilate first
hunters have maga caps
The audience will mostly be furgays anyways
bambi's mother is now murdered by russians
>live action
>will be almost entirely if not entirely CGI because why cast a hunter when you can just render one
I know its bascially just beung used as shorthand for "not drawn" but that shit triggers my tism like you wouldnt believe.
There is no cgi, that's one of the big marketing points, haven't you seen the news? They're using a trained deer.
mom gets shot by police. bambi starts riots and burns down the forest.
leaked publicity photo of the new bambi
>netflix bambi
>AYO
*shits all over your lawn*
>SO YOU BE SAYIN'
*smacks lips with a mouthful of grass*
>WE WUZ DEER
*shoots out five babies*
>'N SHEEEEIIIIIT
*jumps in front of a car and fricking dies*
>bambi is black
>mom gets shot by cops
>the rest is BLM riots but with regular animals
Is this another fake tweet. I'm going to have to ask you to link the source. There are too many liars posting these days.
Bambi's mom will come out as trans and get murdered by a trump voter hunter
Lemme guess
>DUH FOREST FIRE STARTED CUZ OF CLIMATE CHANGE!!!!!
Omg we NEED to pay extra taxes STAT
How the frick do you modernise Bambi? Cast black VA's? I'm talking realistically.
Probably instead of a hunter you’re going to have loggers cutting down the forest or pollution or some bullshit
Bambi befrends a black girl who's a vegan activist and she tries to sabotage the hunters (who are all white men of course)
How could it be love action? Or does live action these days mean CGI?
Bambi will have dark brown fur and will be voiced by a Black
Song of the South is like the most boringly wholesome shit ever that got memed into being Disney's Birth of a Nation by people who've never even fricking seen it.
This.
By all accounts and especially because it's based on a real person, Pocahontas is far more racist a movie. Yet somehow the notion of a fictional black man working on a post slavery planation singing a happy song once in his life, is tantamount to promoting Jim Crow laws.
>Song of the South is like the most boringly wholesome shit ever that got memed into being Disney's Birth of a Nation by people who've never even fricking seen it.
The Fox and The Hound on the other hand...
What about the Fox and The Hound?
Yeah, every bit I've seen of it is just friendly and nice, you can even make a point to make it anti-racist, but somehow it's memed into being Disney's Mein Kampf.
That's what makes it funny. I'm old enough to have grown up watching SOTS before it got yeeted. I remember it being pleasant and recognizing the similarities of the magpies to the melanin enriched kids at school.
Birth of a Nation should get released, great movie with a valuable message.
I've fricking seen it and you're right, it's just an old black man singing about his wonderful day with cartoon animals around him.
exactly. if a black guy from 100 years ago is portrayed as happy that would undermine the establishment's narrative about white supremacy.
Birth of the nation is good though
Oh shit I meant song of the south
>another unnecessary live action remake
Why won't it end?
Who tf is watching these?
chinks
lots of chinks
Box office says otherwise
I wonder if Disney adults will ever get tired of eating shit in the name of resisting capitalism
Disney is their religion so don’t get your hopes up
>movie about a deer whose mother is shot by a hunter
>wanting kids to relate to it
Yeah, instead of getting shot Bambi's mother will OD on fenty after getting hooked on opoids because of over prescription. Modern day youth will love that
Sounds pretty relatable to any Shitmerican lol
>Shitmerican
C'mon man, you know you can think of a better pun than that.
Modern writers are obsessed. Relate or relatable may as well be a buzzword.
Its relatable because we all love our mothers... dont we anon?
They'll show the hunter being abusive to his family first
An evil redneck stereotype will be the villain.
A PoC will personal save Bambi from death.
Bambi will saw off his horns & pretend to be a doe
Interspecies gay skunk sex
Bahamian will found a communist party of the forest animals
I.e. more Black folk and homosexuals
Bambi's girlfriend saves herself from the other male dear and she tells Bambi she doesn't need a male to save her.
Three hours of high quality pixar-grade animation of slender feminine anthro deer boys having hot sweaty moan-riddled gay sex in the grass, utilizing water physics from Elementals for the (many) cumshots.
>bambi get hypnotized
Why all these shitty live actions which cost more than hiring a korean animation team?
Do children even like these films? As a kid I much preferred animation over live-action.
Bambi was made by Walt to be a ''neo pagan nature worship film''. there is no way modern Disney wont try to destroy its legacy as much as possible.
It’s based on a book about deer and other woodland creatures living in an Austrian forest
They can't show gun violence in current year. The hunter will be replaced by Climate Change
>Bambi with mulatto light brown afro confirmed
That’s all I gathered from that statement.
Saw this a few years ago. I remember adoring it as a kid but I was so bored on the rewatch. What did I miss?
>Modernized retelling
How do you modernize a story about a deer in the fricking forest? It's already pretty much timeless. They are going to make Bambi's mom a super powerful girlboss who was just as powerful and cool as his dad and make global warming kill her.
Other than the strong heterosexual romance implied as the sole order of things, there’s not much to talk about here. The most important woman is never even named, and is killed off (Forcing a man into action… is this Disney’s first instance of fridging a woman? …probably not, but it’s something to thing about.) But I will mention a few things. First, even female animals are given makeup and curves? That’s just bizarre. And the women in this forest are INCREDIBLY aggressive sexually. The men all initially act like stereotypical “Girls are gross!” teens/preteens… and then are immediately seduced by some very aggressive women. (Flower, who honestly came off as feminine to me until they made his voice more masculine after he grew up, is kissed and goes stiff, being engorged with blood; Thumper gets slowly hip-swayed at by a lusty bunny; Bambi gets face-licked by Faline.) Bambi, of course, almost immediately gets into a fight with another man… either over Faline or just because men fight? Nature, man. We also have Faline being saved from dogs by Bambi, and this awkward thing where Bambi’s mom is shot and killed, and Bambi is ALSO shot… and walks it off because that’s a thing one can do with bullets? Oh, and once again, we see Disney having a thing for single motherhood… but unlike in Dumbo, we actually know the fate of Bambi’s dad… He’s alive! We see him! He talks! He’s the Great Prince of the Forest! And… he doesn’t help raise Bambi until Bambi’s mom dies… and there’s no reason given. What the hell, dad? But Bambi’s mom was doing a pretty great job, so good on her. Too bad dad showed up to teach his son how to shirk responsibility. Also it doesn't pass the Bechdel Test.
maicon kuster is a hack and a b***h
>Bambi gets groomed
It's just about some animals in the woods what's there to modernize?
REMEMBAH DA WOODS
REMEMBAHYOURMAMAWASDEADINTHEWOODS
CHIKKA WA WAA CHIKKA WAAA
haha
>kids can no longer relate to universal themes
In the new adapted version, Bambi feels no remorse when his mom dies because "she used to gaslight me in a toxic upbringing anyway" and finds acceptance with his new adopted gay parents
Frick that we had the best remake 20 years ago
?si=Tga61nnqBZntxSAT
I'll never understand (internet) boomer humor
I tried to watch this for the first time in like 30 years and lemme tell ya, those guys were definitely some zoophile perverts.
Nuke California
BAMBI FLOSS
Bambi's turbo alpha stoic dad is what I'm thinking they will go after.
Oh right, definitely that.
>a modern retelling about a fricking deer in the forest
I’m so beyond sick of this
>bambi's mom gets killed by a ford F-150
>love action animal movie
how?
They already did Lion King
that's animated
Disney movies don't deserve a dignified legacy.
There will be far better films in the future of animation, and Disney will not be remembered fondly.
>Disney movies make people think they're smart.
Bambi is being played by a black bear
I saw a baby deer dead on the side of the road today and I'm still upset about it. The poor thing was caked in mud and its head was half-submerged in a dirty puddle, all alone.
it was dead, you couldn't do anything to help.
I'm sorry, anon. You can know nature is a vengeful c**t but sometimes when you see her handiwork, it does chafe a bit. You know the cure? Be kind to the next animal you meet.
you're saying it's not going to be a faithful adaption of felix salten's story with gobo and the magpies?
The hunter who kills Bambi's mom will be dressed in full nazi regalia and say "heil hitler on behalf of all white people" before squeezing the trigger.