Batman is the world's greatest spy, i don't know why he's labeled a "detective", he's really more of a spy than a detective. also private investigator.
Batman is the world's greatest spy, i don't know why he's labeled a "detective", he's really more of a spy than a detective. also private investigator.
This touches on an unwritten rule about batman that some writers don't understand and the good ones do. Batman works when his batman identity is justified. He has to work with Gordon to fight crimes as a masked vigilante instead of simply donating money or hiring private security because he's up against the mob abd half of the force is on the take. His no kill room is justified not just morally (bullshit, this was a hayes code thing) but also practically because it is what keeps the general public on the side of his vigilantism, preventing the crooked cops waging an all out war against him
The next step for Bond is to go full circle and go back to being campy, but not (yet) to the ridiculous level of something like Die Another Day. The gritty approach was refreshing but that style of filmmaking has gotten stale now.
I'm hoping this is much more in line with your post while also being more in line with the themes of the books:
If I can't handle negativity from anonymous strangers on an in basket weaving newsletter, how am I supposed to get published or optioned? Arnold pic even more related
[...]
My Bond girl's name is Dr Sally Fuchs-Welle. Mentally I'm living in 1967 my current-year contribution is I want Moneypenny to eventually win the waifubowl
>Goldfinger = PERFECT amount of camp >You only live twice = way too much camp
I find the whole Roger Moore AND Craig era to ne distasteful, too much of each extreme
This touches on an unwritten rule about batman that some writers don't understand and the good ones do. Batman works when his batman identity is justified. He has to work with Gordon to fight crimes as a masked vigilante instead of simply donating money or hiring private security because he's up against the mob abd half of the force is on the take. His no kill room is justified not just morally (bullshit, this was a hayes code thing) but also practically because it is what keeps the general public on the side of his vigilantism, preventing the crooked cops waging an all out war against him
[...]
I'm hoping this is much more in line with your post while also being more in line with the themes of the books: [...]
>Goldfinger = PERFECT amount of camp >You only live twice = way too much camp
I find the whole Roger Moore AND Craig era to ne distasteful, too much of each extreme
I'm sorry you two, is my rad James Bond thread interrupting you guys jerking off constantly over a fricking superhero? Gotta make sure fricking Batman or Deadpool or Aquaman gets mentioned in every thread, right? Are you 7 years old?
Take your homosexual capeshit to Cinemaphile you fricking homosexual comic book loving manchildren, this is a Bond thread. Grow the frick up.
I'm 31 and I hate other millennials so much it's unreal. When I become supreme leader of the western world my first act will be to erect capeshit death camps and see to it you are all slowly but violently eaten by hungry, angry, carnivorous swans.
You immature little homos always ruin everything. I cannot imagine how embarrassing it must be admitting that you're an adult comic book fan.
>Oh but Batman is like, dark and gritty, he's the ADULT's superhero
No he's not, little Gen Alpha kids don't jizz themselves over this shit like you b***hes do. You're a grown-ass man, quit being such a little queer.
Matches Malone says hi
Batman is more of a master of disguise than Bond ever was
other than the Moore version dressing up as a clown i can't even recall Bond using any real disguises
Ugh, well actually, James bond is the code name for the designated spy 007. All 007's through history have assumed the named James bond when they accept the role.
This is a myth. It's supposed to be the same man throughout the entire series. One of the Bonds is understandably touchy about someone bringing up his dead wife, who another Bond actor married. The lie that James Bond is just a codename is a recent psyop to attempt to soften the blow when that Broccoli c**t inevitability casts a black next time.
Then how comes, the same man, instead of using cool gadgets like he used to once upon a time ago, would literally only just use a frickig gun and was all muh gritty and realistic?
Watch the movies. You clearly haven't see n some of the best ones because there are many refrences to this being the same man. Entire scenes devoted to it even. Start with On Her Majesty's Secret Service.
My point is yeah it all makes sense that Piers Brosnon, Sean Connorey, Roger Moore, etc to all canonically be one person because the style of the films all blend well together, e.g. camp spy movies. Daniel Craig's Bond was concieved in the Borne triology and Dark Knight era where everything was gritty, realsitic. The Daniel Craig movies are a hard reboot at best.
"This never happened to the other fellow" was referring to Sean Connery performing the Bond character, not another person who was James Bond before him. It was a 4th wall break and fans hated it then and now because it doesn't seem right in the series. It was then, and probably still is now one of the most controversial moments of all the movies. They never attempted to break the 4th wall again.
Craig is closer to what Fleming wrote than any other.
10 months ago
Anonymous
Nobody cares about books
10 months ago
Anonymous
WE FRICKIN DID IT BOYS
CAVILL CHADS WHERE WE AT?
I wouldn't even be offended if Idris Elba were to play Bond but casting a blonde was an outrage to me
Also tell me this doesn't look exactly like Roger Moore
Do you expect me to talk? No Mr. Blonde, I expect you to DYE
10 months ago
Anonymous
The problem with Craig isn't that he's blonde. It's that the movies are just so dour and Craig is constantly sucking on a dour pickle
10 months ago
Anonymous
The problem with Craig isn't that he's blonde. It's that the movies are just so dour and Craig is constantly sucking on a dour pickle
The problem is that Bond was problematic in the year 20xx so they had to make him boring. He can't shag all the girls and kill all the minorities in the new movies.
A cigarette that shoots teeny rockets and a laser watch never go out of style. There's just no creativity and directors think they're badass if they say "dude what if we took X and made it DARK".
Nobody wants to watch Bond install malware on Blofeld's iphone for 2 hours
Despite how campy some of Connery's ans Moore's films got, they never were snarky like the later Craig ones who thought themselves above their dinosaur audience. Though i hate how Brosnan's Bond was made to be emasculated early on
That's some dumb as shit headcanon. Why would they keep on handing down the name of the worlds most famous spy, when the whole point of an alias is that it's supposed to guard your true identity.
That makes it worse! He's supposed to be black ops, and the longer that MI5 spooks have been using that name, the less sekrit it can be.
You're supposed to change your password regularly for a reason
I'm incredibly racist and I don't care if a role gets raceswapped as long as it's a good actor and the character is fictional and they're not trying to seriously pass off a real historical figure like Churchill or King Henry VIII as having been black in a documentary setting. Even "Hamilton" was like "yeah we know these guys weren't black but what if they were", they didn't try to blatantly lie and tell people the founding fathers were battle rapping each other.
Idris Elba is pretty kino, I'd watch an entire LOTR movie with him as Aragorn because he's a good actor and could make it work. I would say Elba should play Bond, but after those twat writers fricked him out of Witcher, Cavill deserves it.
>that thing everyone knows but actors are now black HAHAHAHA FRICK YOU
This is precisely why Idris Elba said he didn't want to play Bond and he would have considered it if not for woke homosexuals wanting him for this exact reason
1st choice Sean connery
2nd choice Sean connery
3rd choice Sean Connery
...but how would you feel about Tom Hardy? He has a great range and seems more fitting than Aaron Taylor-Johnson, but he might be too old to play a 38 year old Bond. I'm not really sure what other options there are, as Cavil is the right age but is a little too polished and I don't think his range matches this interpretation.
The other most important questions are who plays the two villains, the bond girl, and Moneypenny?
For Hilton, I think either a more eloquent than usual cigar chomping Ron Perlman, or an older Henry Cavil doing his best Patrick Bateman impression.
>how would you feel about Tom Hardy?
Your script seems to portray a more "rough and tumble" Bond than we've seen since Connery, I think he'd be a great choice actually.
>Your script seems to portray a more "rough and tumble" Bond than we've seen since Connery
Does he seem like his own man, or too much of a connery clone?
10 months ago
Anonymous
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I could see Hardy in your role over Connery, actually. I'm gonna read it again but this time in Hardy's voice.
10 months ago
Anonymous
Lmao, read it in Bond's voice
>perhaps he's wondering why you'd tell him your master plan, before throwing him out of an airplane
Pretty based of him to be tbh
Pro tip: he's talking about left wing racism, i.e. tokenism, e.g. saying shit "we NEED an black bondo"
Now I hate darkies as much as any reasonable man would, but Idris Elbow is actually a decent thespian, so I'd give him 50/50 of being not any worse than Craig
Why is Idris Elba a thing anyway? I only remember him from Rock'n'rolla
They were casting him into everything because Wesley Snipes is on the run from Johnny Law and Keith David is even older than Elbow, and what other blackfellas have any screen presence whatsoever?
It was a double bluff. Meaning he expected them not to believe an English agent would actually announce their real name, therefore they would conclude he cannot be an English agent, he is just someone pretending. Oldest trick in the spy book.
In a treatment in working on, Bond has his name and mi6 agent status revealed by SMERSH(Russia secret Counterintelligence) in order to burn him. Bond subsequently introduces himself by his real name for the first time, blowing his cover, in a gambit to enter the villains inner circle by pretending to be a double agent going rogue. The villain only reveals his plans to Bond after a series of mind games abd tests to see if Bond is really commited to his cause
would you like to see the treatment? I've been told it's extremely kino
you wanna see it? The whole thing hit me like a lightning bolt and I wrote the entirely plotted rough draft in an hour or so at 3 am. I kinda want to do a trilogy where his events with SMERSH and Spectre carry a thru lone between films, with a very loose sort of 3 act structure in tone
If you’re happy to expose yourself to Cinemaphile knowing full well the risks of doing so then I’d absolutely like to read it. Sounds like you’ve blended Fleming and le Carré and I have no problem with that.
But I repeat: this is Cinemaphile so tread carefully.
It’s more that if he’s a sensitive soul the 95% negative trolling regardless of quality might crush his spirit. I hate this place as much as I love it. Even modern Cinemaphile is my exemplar of cosmic balance.
10 months ago
Anonymous
If I can't handle negativity from anonymous strangers on an in basket weaving newsletter, how am I supposed to get published or optioned? Arnold pic even more related
[...]
The problem is that Bond was problematic in the year 20xx so they had to make him boring. He can't shag all the girls and kill all the minorities in the new movies.
My Bond girl's name is Dr Sally Fuchs-Welle. Mentally I'm living in 1967 my current-year contribution is I want Moneypenny to eventually win the waifubowl
10 months ago
Anonymous
>His ultimate plan is to trigger another proxy war between the U.S. and USSR. via false-flag-attack to drain both of them of resources while getting rich shorting the countries in conflict.
LMAO like anyone would actually get away with this in real life what an absurd premise oh wait
10 months ago
Anonymous
What are you trying to imply?
10 months ago
Anonymous
just wait till you get to the villains lifestyle
10 months ago
Anonymous
Yeah, why go to such absurd lengths when you could just run the company that supplies the war effort and make billions that way?
10 months ago
Anonymous
I insinuate that Kissinger is a member of SPECTRE and SPECTRE infiltrated CIA kills kennedy
10 months ago
Anonymous
I don't think Kissinger IRL had anything to do with the death of Kennedy, but the fricker is a war criminal, so clown on him all you want.
10 months ago
Anonymous
No not that he's to do with Kennedy directly, just that he's another spectre agent trying to accelerate the Vietnam War from the inside
10 months ago
Anonymous
Here (you) go[...]
[...] >Those hairy legs
HE JUST LIKE ME FOR REAL
I'm only on page 3 but this is fricking fantastic so far.
Should Bond really take LSD and undo his shirt? it seems undignified for the character but at the same time it's something spies actually did
10 months ago
Anonymous
Without detestable jokey jokes there still has to be something to keep things light. The subject matter of the outline might come across as too dark otherwise, but so are the original connery films' elements but they play things straight. Modern films basically tell you how to feel instead of letting you come to your own conclusion and I'm sick of it
10 months ago
Anonymous
I'm loving this so far
Fricking way better than any of the boring, tired generic Daniel Craig shit I've seen.
Doing a film set in the 60's filmed with 2023's techniques would be something the franchise hasn't already done but I'm afraid some lazy homosexual director/ producer would be tempted to cheap out and CGI everything so you'd have to stipulate that this absolutely is not to be done.
10 months ago
Anonymous
If I had any nuts to flex, my point blank demand is that the movie MUST be directed by a Broadway musical director (from their perspective its cheaper too). They will understand how to get good performances,
How to choreography that interacts with the fight scenes and environment (vis a vis fights being like the dances and musical numbers), blocking, mis en scene, how to make scenes interesting when it's simply characters talking, and most importantly LEAVE THE BSCKGROUND AND CAMERA STILL FOR ST LEAST JUST FIVE FRICKING SECONDS. their shortcomings can be complemented with an experienced cinematographer
10 months ago
Anonymous
>LEAVE THE BSCKGROUND AND CAMERA STILL FOR ST LEAST JUST FIVE FRICKING SECONDS
I hate, hate, hate it when directors jostle around the camera like it's in the back of a pickup truck on a dirt road to hide the fact that their fight scenes are poorly done. It nauseates me.
Connery actually learned Judo to play Bond and he makes it look good on camera, modern actors don't have that kind of dedication except for Cavill
10 months ago
Anonymous
I don't even mind sloppy choreography either. He's bond, not ip man. Doing sloppy judo is a less is more approach because the struggle is more relatable and human making the more impress stunts even more impressive. The fight with Grant at the end of From Russia With Love is more edge of your seat than any movie I can think of recently. A good thing to notice when screening for cancer is that the choreography has the actors virtually standing in place while doing extremely fast hand-chakra with each other. This is evidence that the scene was filmed on a green screen to be completely cgi'd, so the direct has no idea what he's directing or how the characters will interact with the environment so resorts to autistic hand flapping in an attempt to make the fight interesting
10 months ago
Anonymous
I'm sorry, I had to physically remove a couple of spandex-loving capeshit degenerates from my thread, where were we?
Speaking of bad fight scenes and capeshit I recall one especially terrible one in CW's "Arrow" that my parents were watching and you could just tell the actors had no knowledge of how to fight and the shaking was done deliberately to hide the stunt performers' faces. One of the worst cases of this I'd ever seen. Everything was so slow and clunky, which you tend to notice if you have even 6 months of strip mall martial arts training.
" Bond expresses disappointment that in proper medical jargon, his physical assessment includes “Unremarkable Penis”." fricking LMAO you're so great at writing him I keep reading all of his lines in Connery's voice
10 months ago
Anonymous
Thanks man!
My father was is a huge fan of the connery Bond films, and his father had all the books. The first film he showed me was Dr No. But his favorite was Goldfinger, which i never liked as a child becauseI thoughtit was boringand bond spent most of the films as prisoner. Until re-watching it recently my favorite was goldeneye, but as an adult goldfinger is undoubtedly the best film as it has the best villain, best acting, best dialogue, best score, brilliantly entertaining Bond as he and Goldfinger try to out compete or trick each other, and now as an adult I understand the sheer genius of "James Bond saves America with his penis" and doesn't involve him needing to fight dozens of extras like in thunderball
10 months ago
Anonymous
Just finished it, and it has no right being this good. Perfect amount of camp and kino, 10/10 fund it.
10 months ago
Anonymous
I already have a full trilogy planned
ACT 2: Nightingale. Opening theme: Vampyre of Time and Memory by QOTSA. Bond's character has been established so this is more of Rollercoaster than the previous slow burn, meant to have the sort of just-good-fun feel of Double-O Nothings Berlin scene.
Bases extremely loosely on the Spy who loved me novel and 007 in New York short story. Bond pretends to be burn noticed fir using his real name in order to go into deep cover and give UK plausible deniability. Bond rescues a girl at a motel like in TSWLM, but its initially just to get at the villain -- bond is trying to stop a narco terrorism plot where the KGB, having net their stretch goals, plans to lace their heroine with carfentanil to kill thousands of Americans. Bond must team up with lone wolf Quarrel, remained as shaft/Black Dynamite, who make a foil with quarrels streetcars and low tech approach. Quarrels wants to avenge the death of his wide who OD'd, while bond ultimately rescues the girl against orders. This is more of a buddy cops movie, they start out oppositionally, but warm up after finding out they were both born in Birmingham
Act 3: Ghost of St George's Past. Theme: Man of War by Radiohead
Bond is back at MI6 and us mostly in an instructional role. Spectre tries to Thunderball/NSNA, but the head of SMERSH General Zmey, a possadist, secretly steals the nukes for himself. While the whole of NATO is distracted by SPECTRE, Zmey liquidates blowfeld and intends to start nuclear war to usher in the final communist revolution. Our most epic and Goldeneye/Raiders of The Lost ark-esque. Moneypenny wins the waifubowl as Bond finally retires. >would you like to know more, citizen?
10 months ago
Anonymous
I always loved Quarrel, one of my fav characters
Is Felix really cannonically mormon or did you add that? great touch either way.
10 months ago
Anonymous
I added that. The part about the CIA being filled with Mormons is true though
10 months ago
Anonymous
Cast your perfect Bond for your trilogy, alive or dead
Bonus points for alive so I can hold out hope it gets made
10 months ago
Anonymous
1st choice Sean connery
2nd choice Sean connery
3rd choice Sean Connery
...but how would you feel about Tom Hardy? He has a great range and seems more fitting than Aaron Taylor-Johnson, but he might be too old to play a 38 year old Bond. I'm not really sure what other options there are, as Cavil is the right age but is a little too polished and I don't think his range matches this interpretation.
The other most important questions are who plays the two villains, the bond girl, and Moneypenny?
For Hilton, I think either a more eloquent than usual cigar chomping Ron Perlman, or an older Henry Cavil doing his best Patrick Bateman impression.
10 months ago
Anonymous
Anon, that's fricking great. Nice work.
10 months ago
Anonymous
Based, too on the nose with pedo elites, but very nice indeed.
10 months ago
Anonymous
KINO
10 months ago
Anonymous
>I want Moneypenny to eventually win the waifubowl
Alright gentlemen, how do we get this funded?
10 months ago
Anonymous
Nice work anon, I skimmed through and it looks good. I’ve been watching Bond since I was in kindergarten (saw everyone of them) but have only partially read from Russia With Love. I think the next Bond film they do should be set in the 50’s or 60’s and should bring back the old school Bond vibe. To keep this thread going we’re gonna get a top 5 Bond tier list started, everyone post yours:
5. Living Daylights (Dalton is the most faithful adaption of the literary character next to Connery)
4. Goldeneye (kino all around, plus Brosnan looks the most like the literary character)
3. Dr. No (started it all, still solid as a film)
2. From Russia With Love (Cold War kino, JFK’s favorite bond novel)
1. Goldfinger (kino film with kino soundtrack)
Also here’s the best mix of the Bond theme in any of the movies. The build up followed by the theme is amazing https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ARR51SFcm5Y&pp=ygUWTGl2aW5nIGRheWxpZ2h0cyBjaGFzZQ%3D%3D
And finally here’s a track from Goldfinger https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mfPrxb5KI38&pp=ygUZR29sZGZpbmdlciB0cmFja2luZyB0aGVtZQ%3D%3D
10 months ago
Anonymous
Top five?? You fool you had 1 job! Make it top 7
10 months ago
Anonymous
>You Only Live Twice (had it on VHS as a kid and watched it a million times) >Dr No >Goldfinger >From Russia With Love >Live and Let Die
BONUS
>Die Another Day (shut up I liked it) >The World is Not Enough (shut up I liked it too)
This is why we need
I already have a full trilogy planned
ACT 2: Nightingale. Opening theme: Vampyre of Time and Memory by QOTSA. Bond's character has been established so this is more of Rollercoaster than the previous slow burn, meant to have the sort of just-good-fun feel of Double-O Nothings Berlin scene.
Bases extremely loosely on the Spy who loved me novel and 007 in New York short story. Bond pretends to be burn noticed fir using his real name in order to go into deep cover and give UK plausible deniability. Bond rescues a girl at a motel like in TSWLM, but its initially just to get at the villain -- bond is trying to stop a narco terrorism plot where the KGB, having net their stretch goals, plans to lace their heroine with carfentanil to kill thousands of Americans. Bond must team up with lone wolf Quarrel, remained as shaft/Black Dynamite, who make a foil with quarrels streetcars and low tech approach. Quarrels wants to avenge the death of his wide who OD'd, while bond ultimately rescues the girl against orders. This is more of a buddy cops movie, they start out oppositionally, but warm up after finding out they were both born in Birmingham
Act 3: Ghost of St George's Past. Theme: Man of War by Radiohead
Bond is back at MI6 and us mostly in an instructional role. Spectre tries to Thunderball/NSNA, but the head of SMERSH General Zmey, a possadist, secretly steals the nukes for himself. While the whole of NATO is distracted by SPECTRE, Zmey liquidates blowfeld and intends to start nuclear war to usher in the final communist revolution. Our most epic and Goldeneye/Raiders of The Lost ark-esque. Moneypenny wins the waifubowl as Bond finally retires. >would you like to know more, citizen?
's Bond movies set in the 60's, we all know they were the best movies.
If I can't handle negativity from anonymous strangers on an in basket weaving newsletter, how am I supposed to get published or optioned? Arnold pic even more related
[...]
My Bond girl's name is Dr Sally Fuchs-Welle. Mentally I'm living in 1967 my current-year contribution is I want Moneypenny to eventually win the waifubowl
Bond is less a spy and more an assassin. When Britain needs a problem solved or something removed, they send in a 00 agent. And if one 00 fails, they will just send another.
Bond simply assumes he's been made already before he sets foot in front of the bar
And if they haven't, they will as soon as he orders the same fricking thing he always orders
The next step for Bond is to go full circle and go back to being campy, but not (yet) to the ridiculous level of something like Die Another Day. The gritty approach was refreshing but that style of filmmaking has gotten stale now.
>be worlds greatest spy >announce first and last name to anyone who asks >smoke, drink and frick dozens of women on company time >still win every time
Based
Fleming stole the name from an ornithologist who wrote a book on birds of Jamaica. Bond's announcing someone else's name, who has a boring job that takes him innawoods and ex communicado for long periods of time, so if someone were to try to track down Bond, they'd waste a couple weeks and come up with just a random twitcher at the end.
English programmes and movies love this fact so a lot of shows have a "James Bond" who is there to give a lecture on native birds of the Carribbean, or Fleming going to a bird watchers meeting.
The ITV version of Miss Marple has a Fleming attending a bird lecture given by a James Bond in Carribbean Mystery for example.
British intelligence is part of their navy, and if you're in the intelligence service you have a naval rank. Bond is technically a naval reverse commander.
Agents are not employed by the service, they're like assets or CIs in other systems, they're just anyone who can supply information etc.
Bond has always reflected the era that it was filmed during. What's the legitimate excuse against a black bond or a trans man bond? or a female bond? It reflects the current times
>"I have you trapped Mr. Bond, now you must give me the information I require or I'll-" >"Oh wow, uh... looks like someone already beat me to it." >"Shit man, did you just take your cyanide capsule?" >"But I... I haven't even done anything yet."
It was the 60s it's not like they could Google him. Are they going to seek out every James Bond in England? They can't even verify its his real name or not anyway.
Um, if you know anything about spycraft you would know that it is very rare that a spy would ever be in a position where they would use a fake name.
Most field officers are placed in roles in diplomatic embassies and consulates in foreign countries under their real name. They then go out and recruit assets who have access to information. These assets usually work in sensitive government or private industry roles or are close relatives of such people and they all, of course, are using their real name.
>about spycraft
British secret services have an insane amount of services for their actual employees (not assets, which is what a lot of the friends with the same school tie are). They're entirely separate from government and the Bank of England, but can generate completely legal legends and companies with completely legal imaginary money. It's insanely overpowered for the amount of actual spying they do. They could, in theory, pay all their employees the equivalent of the the UK's entire bank balance EACH and all of it would show up in the bank as legal tender.
The field officers often have legends, and the point of the network of assets is they vouch for the legend. A lot of the time you don't even need to tell the asset they're lying about the legend because legit government and background financial checks will say everything's good.
The government and Bank of England have been trying to put oversight on it and MI5/6 were just like lol no
It comes from how OSS was set up by the original guy in charge (they call him C not M) who told the monarchy and armed forces that if the government were ever to know what they were doing, there could be some British responsibility for their actions which would be undeniable so it would be best if neither the army nor any other governmental body knew about the potential war crimes and dirty tricks they might have to employ.
>Oh 007 I'm so glad you're here, it's time to go and destabilize another third-world country so we can get even more immigrant rapist refugees to come here to London to live on taxpayer money >And Prince Andrew needs you to murder a rather nosy reporter writing about his visit to that lovely Mr. Epstein's island >Don't forget to tip the Rothschilds on your way out, ta-ta!
>Y-Yes ma'am...
When did you realize that James Bond was actually the bad guy?
>Announce your real last name and then full name whenever somebody asks who you are.
these posts hurt my head
isahomo. anon isahomo.
where were u when op finally and irrevocably got BTFO'd by these trips of truth
Batman is the world's greatest spy, i don't know why he's labeled a "detective", he's really more of a spy than a detective. also private investigator.
He's a detective, he rarely spies. Does it occur to you Bond also do detecting ?
He literally works with Gordon in crime scenes to figure out what happened. That's detective work. But yes he's also good at espionage.
This touches on an unwritten rule about batman that some writers don't understand and the good ones do. Batman works when his batman identity is justified. He has to work with Gordon to fight crimes as a masked vigilante instead of simply donating money or hiring private security because he's up against the mob abd half of the force is on the take. His no kill room is justified not just morally (bullshit, this was a hayes code thing) but also practically because it is what keeps the general public on the side of his vigilantism, preventing the crooked cops waging an all out war against him
I'm hoping this is much more in line with your post while also being more in line with the themes of the books:
>Goldfinger = PERFECT amount of camp
>You only live twice = way too much camp
I find the whole Roger Moore AND Craig era to ne distasteful, too much of each extreme
I'm sorry you two, is my rad James Bond thread interrupting you guys jerking off constantly over a fricking superhero? Gotta make sure fricking Batman or Deadpool or Aquaman gets mentioned in every thread, right? Are you 7 years old?
Take your homosexual capeshit to Cinemaphile you fricking homosexual comic book loving manchildren, this is a Bond thread. Grow the frick up.
I'm sorry that insane man in a cape beating up criminals is more interesting than James Boomer
I'm 31 and I hate other millennials so much it's unreal. When I become supreme leader of the western world my first act will be to erect capeshit death camps and see to it you are all slowly but violently eaten by hungry, angry, carnivorous swans.
You immature little homos always ruin everything. I cannot imagine how embarrassing it must be admitting that you're an adult comic book fan.
>Oh but Batman is like, dark and gritty, he's the ADULT's superhero
No he's not, little Gen Alpha kids don't jizz themselves over this shit like you b***hes do. You're a grown-ass man, quit being such a little queer.
Matches Malone says hi
Batman is more of a master of disguise than Bond ever was
other than the Moore version dressing up as a clown i can't even recall Bond using any real disguises
Are you moronic?
He was just flexing
Ugh, well actually, James bond is the code name for the designated spy 007. All 007's through history have assumed the named James bond when they accept the role.
Not unless Skyfall isn’t canon
No James Bond movie is canon that stars Daniel Craig
This is a myth. It's supposed to be the same man throughout the entire series. One of the Bonds is understandably touchy about someone bringing up his dead wife, who another Bond actor married. The lie that James Bond is just a codename is a recent psyop to attempt to soften the blow when that Broccoli c**t inevitability casts a black next time.
Also reddit theories. Reddit fricking helped ruin Hollywood with it's moronic fan theories.
In FYEO Moore Bond mourns at the grave of his wife who was killed in OHMSS, a Lazenby Bond film
>that Broccoli c**t
He's been dead for 27 years.
Isn't his daughter in charge? I assume the poster is referring to her.
His stupid b***h daughter is in charge which is why it’s been so downhill
wouldn't that mean that he is like 90 years old in No Time to Die, assuming he's at least 30 yo in the first james bond movie in the 1960's?
The spirit of England is eternal
The Craig movies are a reboot and are in a different continuity. As for the age difference between Dr No and Die Another Day - don't think about it.
All the Bond movies happen in "current time". You're supposed to pretend the old movies are the present and not a lot of time is passing between them.
Your headcanon isn't backed up by any actual proof. From Dr. No to Die Another Day, it's the same man.
Then how comes, the same man, instead of using cool gadgets like he used to once upon a time ago, would literally only just use a frickig gun and was all muh gritty and realistic?
Watch the movies. You clearly haven't see n some of the best ones because there are many refrences to this being the same man. Entire scenes devoted to it even. Start with On Her Majesty's Secret Service.
My point is yeah it all makes sense that Piers Brosnon, Sean Connorey, Roger Moore, etc to all canonically be one person because the style of the films all blend well together, e.g. camp spy movies. Daniel Craig's Bond was concieved in the Borne triology and Dark Knight era where everything was gritty, realsitic. The Daniel Craig movies are a hard reboot at best.
On Her Majesty's Secret Service was the only movie where he actually had another identity.
This never happened to the other fellow...
"This never happened to the other fellow" was referring to Sean Connery performing the Bond character, not another person who was James Bond before him. It was a 4th wall break and fans hated it then and now because it doesn't seem right in the series. It was then, and probably still is now one of the most controversial moments of all the movies. They never attempted to break the 4th wall again.
>the movies are not canon moron
>watch the movies moron
The best part about Bond died with this man
They haven't been cool or smart or fun ever since, it's just another action man with a gun blowing shit up
Brosnan was the last Bond, Craig's a parody and his Layer Cake movie mogs his 007 movies
Craig is closer to what Fleming wrote than any other.
Nobody cares about books
I wouldn't even be offended if Idris Elba were to play Bond but casting a blonde was an outrage to me
Also tell me this doesn't look exactly like Roger Moore
Do you expect me to talk?
No Mr. Blonde, I expect you to DYE
The problem with Craig isn't that he's blonde. It's that the movies are just so dour and Craig is constantly sucking on a dour pickle
The problem is that Bond was problematic in the year 20xx so they had to make him boring. He can't shag all the girls and kill all the minorities in the new movies.
That honor goes to Lazenby then
>Craig's a parody
More like a deliberate deconstruction/subversion, Moore felt more like a parody
>cool gadgets
gadgets are outdated toys when everything is digital
A cigarette that shoots teeny rockets and a laser watch never go out of style. There's just no creativity and directors think they're badass if they say "dude what if we took X and made it DARK".
Nobody wants to watch Bond install malware on Blofeld's iphone for 2 hours
Despite how campy some of Connery's ans Moore's films got, they never were snarky like the later Craig ones who thought themselves above their dinosaur audience. Though i hate how Brosnan's Bond was made to be emasculated early on
and**
That's some dumb as shit headcanon. Why would they keep on handing down the name of the worlds most famous spy, when the whole point of an alias is that it's supposed to guard your true identity.
lol no, it's always been the same man
That makes it worse! He's supposed to be black ops, and the longer that MI5 spooks have been using that name, the less sekrit it can be.
You're supposed to change your password regularly for a reason
moron
He’s a superhero like Bruce Wayne or Peter Parker, he’s just had a bunch of different actors play him
is it like a dunce hat for spies
Announcing it would still be very moronic.
Incredibly good bait
Wait, james bond?
For some reason every spy they send here has the same name - GET HIM!
Even if that's true it doesn't make it any less silly to go around giving your name so freely
Wtf when I watched it he said my full name and address
He was off the clock
Let's be honest, nobody expects a spy to use their real name. He's a fricking genius
James Bond is a code name. His real name is John Patrick Mason.
His codename is 007
That's not a name, that's a registry designator of the MI6 rank classification providing a specific authorization.
His name is Bond James Bond.
His first name is Bond and his middle name is James.
>patcriotisham ish da virtchuee off da vishos
WE FRICKIN DID IT BOYS
CAVILL CHADS WHERE WE AT?
Sounds like an excuse considering he's almost 50. He's too old, not too black.
I'm incredibly racist and I don't care if a role gets raceswapped as long as it's a good actor and the character is fictional and they're not trying to seriously pass off a real historical figure like Churchill or King Henry VIII as having been black in a documentary setting. Even "Hamilton" was like "yeah we know these guys weren't black but what if they were", they didn't try to blatantly lie and tell people the founding fathers were battle rapping each other.
Idris Elba is pretty kino, I'd watch an entire LOTR movie with him as Aragorn because he's a good actor and could make it work. I would say Elba should play Bond, but after those twat writers fricked him out of Witcher, Cavill deserves it.
Shalom
>Shalom my fellow racists
Shalom to you as well
Thank you
good bait
>but what if they were
Then make that show
Don't make
>that thing everyone knows but actors are now black HAHAHAHA FRICK YOU
Don't do that.
>that thing everyone knows but actors are now black HAHAHAHA FRICK YOU
This is precisely why Idris Elba said he didn't want to play Bond and he would have considered it if not for woke homosexuals wanting him for this exact reason
>how would you feel about Tom Hardy?
Your script seems to portray a more "rough and tumble" Bond than we've seen since Connery, I think he'd be a great choice actually.
>Your script seems to portray a more "rough and tumble" Bond than we've seen since Connery
Does he seem like his own man, or too much of a connery clone?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I could see Hardy in your role over Connery, actually. I'm gonna read it again but this time in Hardy's voice.
Lmao, read it in Bond's voice
>perhaps he's wondering why you'd tell him your master plan, before throwing him out of an airplane
*Bane's
Why is Idris Elba a thing anyway? I only remember him from Rock'n'rolla
Forced meme
Pretty based of him to be tbh
Pro tip: he's talking about left wing racism, i.e. tokenism, e.g. saying shit "we NEED an black bondo"
Now I hate darkies as much as any reasonable man would, but Idris Elbow is actually a decent thespian, so I'd give him 50/50 of being not any worse than Craig
They were casting him into everything because Wesley Snipes is on the run from Johnny Law and Keith David is even older than Elbow, and what other blackfellas have any screen presence whatsoever?
He lives in a world where "James Bond" isn't the name of a famous fictional spy. It's actually a rather bland name otherwise.
Apart from in Diamonds Are Forever when some woman finds a dead body with Bond's passport and exclaims "Oh My God! You just killed James Bond!"
Presumably only put in there for the trailers as nothing comes of that line.
It was a double bluff. Meaning he expected them not to believe an English agent would actually announce their real name, therefore they would conclude he cannot be an English agent, he is just someone pretending. Oldest trick in the spy book.
Bond is the distraction. By announcing himself he gets the spotlight while the real spies get down to bizness. He’s the elephant in the china shop
>while the real spies get down to bizness
*real spies optional and not shown
>not shown
Because they’re that good
You gotta squint to see them shuffling around in the background
are there any villains who know James Bond's name who doesn't die by the end of the film?
Irma Bunt, she kills his wife and gets away with it.
>Irma Bunt
The greatest baseball player
>"The name's Bunt, Irma Bunt"
>proceeds to bunt.
>The names Blonde
>James Blonde
We get it, you're blonde.
My spy name is Jerry Manitoba
In a treatment in working on, Bond has his name and mi6 agent status revealed by SMERSH(Russia secret Counterintelligence) in order to burn him. Bond subsequently introduces himself by his real name for the first time, blowing his cover, in a gambit to enter the villains inner circle by pretending to be a double agent going rogue. The villain only reveals his plans to Bond after a series of mind games abd tests to see if Bond is really commited to his cause
would you like to see the treatment? I've been told it's extremely kino
This actually sounds cool.
>Anyone who does not have my exact opinions is a israelite
I remember my /misc/ phase
you wanna see it? The whole thing hit me like a lightning bolt and I wrote the entirely plotted rough draft in an hour or so at 3 am. I kinda want to do a trilogy where his events with SMERSH and Spectre carry a thru lone between films, with a very loose sort of 3 act structure in tone
If you’re happy to expose yourself to Cinemaphile knowing full well the risks of doing so then I’d absolutely like to read it. Sounds like you’ve blended Fleming and le Carré and I have no problem with that.
But I repeat: this is Cinemaphile so tread carefully.
It's not like privacy exists anymore anyway
It’s more that if he’s a sensitive soul the 95% negative trolling regardless of quality might crush his spirit. I hate this place as much as I love it. Even modern Cinemaphile is my exemplar of cosmic balance.
If I can't handle negativity from anonymous strangers on an in basket weaving newsletter, how am I supposed to get published or optioned? Arnold pic even more related
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1GxHTajL5wDvQhOdTtszHZtcPVh2DUyzN1SKlRbBmP78/edit?usp=drivesdk
My Bond girl's name is Dr Sally Fuchs-Welle. Mentally I'm living in 1967
my current-year contribution is I want Moneypenny to eventually win the waifubowl
>His ultimate plan is to trigger another proxy war between the U.S. and USSR. via false-flag-attack to drain both of them of resources while getting rich shorting the countries in conflict.
LMAO like anyone would actually get away with this in real life what an absurd premise oh wait
What are you trying to imply?
just wait till you get to the villains lifestyle
Yeah, why go to such absurd lengths when you could just run the company that supplies the war effort and make billions that way?
I insinuate that Kissinger is a member of SPECTRE and SPECTRE infiltrated CIA kills kennedy
I don't think Kissinger IRL had anything to do with the death of Kennedy, but the fricker is a war criminal, so clown on him all you want.
No not that he's to do with Kennedy directly, just that he's another spectre agent trying to accelerate the Vietnam War from the inside
I'm only on page 3 but this is fricking fantastic so far.
Should Bond really take LSD and undo his shirt? it seems undignified for the character but at the same time it's something spies actually did
Without detestable jokey jokes there still has to be something to keep things light. The subject matter of the outline might come across as too dark otherwise, but so are the original connery films' elements but they play things straight. Modern films basically tell you how to feel instead of letting you come to your own conclusion and I'm sick of it
I'm loving this so far
Fricking way better than any of the boring, tired generic Daniel Craig shit I've seen.
Doing a film set in the 60's filmed with 2023's techniques would be something the franchise hasn't already done but I'm afraid some lazy homosexual director/ producer would be tempted to cheap out and CGI everything so you'd have to stipulate that this absolutely is not to be done.
If I had any nuts to flex, my point blank demand is that the movie MUST be directed by a Broadway musical director (from their perspective its cheaper too). They will understand how to get good performances,
How to choreography that interacts with the fight scenes and environment (vis a vis fights being like the dances and musical numbers), blocking, mis en scene, how to make scenes interesting when it's simply characters talking, and most importantly LEAVE THE BSCKGROUND AND CAMERA STILL FOR ST LEAST JUST FIVE FRICKING SECONDS. their shortcomings can be complemented with an experienced cinematographer
>LEAVE THE BSCKGROUND AND CAMERA STILL FOR ST LEAST JUST FIVE FRICKING SECONDS
I hate, hate, hate it when directors jostle around the camera like it's in the back of a pickup truck on a dirt road to hide the fact that their fight scenes are poorly done. It nauseates me.
Connery actually learned Judo to play Bond and he makes it look good on camera, modern actors don't have that kind of dedication except for Cavill
I don't even mind sloppy choreography either. He's bond, not ip man. Doing sloppy judo is a less is more approach because the struggle is more relatable and human making the more impress stunts even more impressive. The fight with Grant at the end of From Russia With Love is more edge of your seat than any movie I can think of recently. A good thing to notice when screening for cancer is that the choreography has the actors virtually standing in place while doing extremely fast hand-chakra with each other. This is evidence that the scene was filmed on a green screen to be completely cgi'd, so the direct has no idea what he's directing or how the characters will interact with the environment so resorts to autistic hand flapping in an attempt to make the fight interesting
I'm sorry, I had to physically remove a couple of spandex-loving capeshit degenerates from my thread, where were we?
Speaking of bad fight scenes and capeshit I recall one especially terrible one in CW's "Arrow" that my parents were watching and you could just tell the actors had no knowledge of how to fight and the shaking was done deliberately to hide the stunt performers' faces. One of the worst cases of this I'd ever seen. Everything was so slow and clunky, which you tend to notice if you have even 6 months of strip mall martial arts training.
" Bond expresses disappointment that in proper medical jargon, his physical assessment includes “Unremarkable Penis”." fricking LMAO you're so great at writing him I keep reading all of his lines in Connery's voice
Thanks man!
My father was is a huge fan of the connery Bond films, and his father had all the books. The first film he showed me was Dr No. But his favorite was Goldfinger, which i never liked as a child becauseI thoughtit was boringand bond spent most of the films as prisoner. Until re-watching it recently my favorite was goldeneye, but as an adult goldfinger is undoubtedly the best film as it has the best villain, best acting, best dialogue, best score, brilliantly entertaining Bond as he and Goldfinger try to out compete or trick each other, and now as an adult I understand the sheer genius of "James Bond saves America with his penis" and doesn't involve him needing to fight dozens of extras like in thunderball
Just finished it, and it has no right being this good. Perfect amount of camp and kino, 10/10 fund it.
I already have a full trilogy planned
ACT 2: Nightingale. Opening theme: Vampyre of Time and Memory by QOTSA. Bond's character has been established so this is more of Rollercoaster than the previous slow burn, meant to have the sort of just-good-fun feel of Double-O Nothings Berlin scene.
Bases extremely loosely on the Spy who loved me novel and 007 in New York short story. Bond pretends to be burn noticed fir using his real name in order to go into deep cover and give UK plausible deniability. Bond rescues a girl at a motel like in TSWLM, but its initially just to get at the villain -- bond is trying to stop a narco terrorism plot where the KGB, having net their stretch goals, plans to lace their heroine with carfentanil to kill thousands of Americans. Bond must team up with lone wolf Quarrel, remained as shaft/Black Dynamite, who make a foil with quarrels streetcars and low tech approach. Quarrels wants to avenge the death of his wide who OD'd, while bond ultimately rescues the girl against orders. This is more of a buddy cops movie, they start out oppositionally, but warm up after finding out they were both born in Birmingham
Act 3: Ghost of St George's Past. Theme: Man of War by Radiohead
Bond is back at MI6 and us mostly in an instructional role. Spectre tries to Thunderball/NSNA, but the head of SMERSH General Zmey, a possadist, secretly steals the nukes for himself. While the whole of NATO is distracted by SPECTRE, Zmey liquidates blowfeld and intends to start nuclear war to usher in the final communist revolution. Our most epic and Goldeneye/Raiders of The Lost ark-esque. Moneypenny wins the waifubowl as Bond finally retires.
>would you like to know more, citizen?
I always loved Quarrel, one of my fav characters
Is Felix really cannonically mormon or did you add that? great touch either way.
I added that. The part about the CIA being filled with Mormons is true though
Cast your perfect Bond for your trilogy, alive or dead
Bonus points for alive so I can hold out hope it gets made
1st choice Sean connery
2nd choice Sean connery
3rd choice Sean Connery
...but how would you feel about Tom Hardy? He has a great range and seems more fitting than Aaron Taylor-Johnson, but he might be too old to play a 38 year old Bond. I'm not really sure what other options there are, as Cavil is the right age but is a little too polished and I don't think his range matches this interpretation.
The other most important questions are who plays the two villains, the bond girl, and Moneypenny?
For Hilton, I think either a more eloquent than usual cigar chomping Ron Perlman, or an older Henry Cavil doing his best Patrick Bateman impression.
Anon, that's fricking great. Nice work.
Based, too on the nose with pedo elites, but very nice indeed.
KINO
>I want Moneypenny to eventually win the waifubowl
Alright gentlemen, how do we get this funded?
Nice work anon, I skimmed through and it looks good. I’ve been watching Bond since I was in kindergarten (saw everyone of them) but have only partially read from Russia With Love. I think the next Bond film they do should be set in the 50’s or 60’s and should bring back the old school Bond vibe. To keep this thread going we’re gonna get a top 5 Bond tier list started, everyone post yours:
5. Living Daylights (Dalton is the most faithful adaption of the literary character next to Connery)
4. Goldeneye (kino all around, plus Brosnan looks the most like the literary character)
3. Dr. No (started it all, still solid as a film)
2. From Russia With Love (Cold War kino, JFK’s favorite bond novel)
1. Goldfinger (kino film with kino soundtrack)
Also here’s the best mix of the Bond theme in any of the movies. The build up followed by the theme is amazing https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ARR51SFcm5Y&pp=ygUWTGl2aW5nIGRheWxpZ2h0cyBjaGFzZQ%3D%3D
And finally here’s a track from Goldfinger https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mfPrxb5KI38&pp=ygUZR29sZGZpbmdlciB0cmFja2luZyB0aGVtZQ%3D%3D
Top five?? You fool you had 1 job! Make it top 7
>You Only Live Twice (had it on VHS as a kid and watched it a million times)
>Dr No
>Goldfinger
>From Russia With Love
>Live and Let Die
BONUS
>Die Another Day (shut up I liked it)
>The World is Not Enough (shut up I liked it too)
This is why we need
's Bond movies set in the 60's, we all know they were the best movies.
Good job 007
I actually really do, post an excerpt
Just gimme a taste Anon.
It sounds like Bond meets Point Break
Here (you) go
>Those hairy legs
HE JUST LIKE ME FOR REAL
Bond is less a spy and more an assassin. When Britain needs a problem solved or something removed, they send in a 00 agent. And if one 00 fails, they will just send another.
Bond simply assumes he's been made already before he sets foot in front of the bar
And if they haven't, they will as soon as he orders the same fricking thing he always orders
can you pull off shorts like that?
Why would I want to pull his shorts off?
Sounds pretty gay.
deadass fr he looks just like me
thats the thing you see him coming and he still gets the penetration in
IT'S THE MOSHT PROMINENT DOMINANT BOMB SHPY SO PAY HOMAGE
The next step for Bond is to go full circle and go back to being campy, but not (yet) to the ridiculous level of something like Die Another Day. The gritty approach was refreshing but that style of filmmaking has gotten stale now.
It's called a power move. He was asserting dominance by demonstrating that you can know his full name and he will still have the upper hand.
>be worlds greatest spy
>announce first and last name to anyone who asks
>smoke, drink and frick dozens of women on company time
>still win every time
Based
Fleming stole the name from an ornithologist who wrote a book on birds of Jamaica. Bond's announcing someone else's name, who has a boring job that takes him innawoods and ex communicado for long periods of time, so if someone were to try to track down Bond, they'd waste a couple weeks and come up with just a random twitcher at the end.
English programmes and movies love this fact so a lot of shows have a "James Bond" who is there to give a lecture on native birds of the Carribbean, or Fleming going to a bird watchers meeting.
The ITV version of Miss Marple has a Fleming attending a bird lecture given by a James Bond in Carribbean Mystery for example.
I could swear the actual James Bond movies make jokes and references to this fact too.
I think Die Another Day has Bond reading a book on birds of Jamaica. It's been a long time since I saw it so I can't say for sure.
He's an agent not a spy
He's an officer not an agent. Agent is basically "local snitch" in Britisher spy language
I thought a spy was just a snitch who works for an agent or handler and that an agent/special agent is a spook who fixes problems outside the law
British intelligence is part of their navy, and if you're in the intelligence service you have a naval rank. Bond is technically a naval reverse commander.
Agents are not employed by the service, they're like assets or CIs in other systems, they're just anyone who can supply information etc.
Reserve*
Then would a special agent be accurate verbiage, or us 00 agent in a category all of its own?
Not if he's British. If he were American, they have agents who are gmen. But Britain has officers.
Bond has always reflected the era that it was filmed during. What's the legitimate excuse against a black bond or a trans man bond? or a female bond? It reflects the current times
>trans bond
>"I have you trapped Mr. Bond, now you must give me the information I require or I'll-"
>"Oh wow, uh... looks like someone already beat me to it."
>"Shit man, did you just take your cyanide capsule?"
>"But I... I haven't even done anything yet."
The torture scene with Le Chiffre would have Bond encouraging him.
>Now the whole world's gonna know that you died dilating my neovegana!!
Deepfake Donald Trump as Goldfinger and its PERFECT
It was the 60s it's not like they could Google him. Are they going to seek out every James Bond in England? They can't even verify its his real name or not anyway.
Hey Boss there's another guy who is calling himself James Bond outside.
>Shoot him in the head and dump the body
OK Boss...
>everyone knows you're a spy
>still win all the time
seems to be working.
Um, if you know anything about spycraft you would know that it is very rare that a spy would ever be in a position where they would use a fake name.
Most field officers are placed in roles in diplomatic embassies and consulates in foreign countries under their real name. They then go out and recruit assets who have access to information. These assets usually work in sensitive government or private industry roles or are close relatives of such people and they all, of course, are using their real name.
You sure seem to know a lot about spying.
What exactly did you say you did for a living, Mr. Anon?
>about spycraft
British secret services have an insane amount of services for their actual employees (not assets, which is what a lot of the friends with the same school tie are). They're entirely separate from government and the Bank of England, but can generate completely legal legends and companies with completely legal imaginary money. It's insanely overpowered for the amount of actual spying they do. They could, in theory, pay all their employees the equivalent of the the UK's entire bank balance EACH and all of it would show up in the bank as legal tender.
The field officers often have legends, and the point of the network of assets is they vouch for the legend. A lot of the time you don't even need to tell the asset they're lying about the legend because legit government and background financial checks will say everything's good.
Pls explain further...
The government and Bank of England have been trying to put oversight on it and MI5/6 were just like lol no
It comes from how OSS was set up by the original guy in charge (they call him C not M) who told the monarchy and armed forces that if the government were ever to know what they were doing, there could be some British responsibility for their actions which would be undeniable so it would be best if neither the army nor any other governmental body knew about the potential war crimes and dirty tricks they might have to employ.
How does that work with the legends? I suck at finance
>Timbers. Shiverme Timbers.
He's not a regular spy, he's a superspy with 999+ LCK and 999+ CHA
Name's Raw.
Blacked Raw.
>Oh 007 I'm so glad you're here, it's time to go and destabilize another third-world country so we can get even more immigrant rapist refugees to come here to London to live on taxpayer money
>And Prince Andrew needs you to murder a rather nosy reporter writing about his visit to that lovely Mr. Epstein's island
>Don't forget to tip the Rothschilds on your way out, ta-ta!
>Y-Yes ma'am...
When did you realize that James Bond was actually the bad guy?
>watching nu-Bond Daniel Craig mope around for 2 hours
pass, I'll re-watch Octopussy and Moonraker before anything made after Casino Royale
The name "James Bond" is a code name. That's why different actors have played him and that's why they can cast a black guy for the next movie.