>down on your luck
>decide to rob a bank
>hear a crash that must be superhero
please don't be nightwing. please don't be nightwing. please don't-
>nightwing jumps on a desk
oh great. you caught me. Could you please just knock me out this tim-
>jumps on another desk
>jumps in the air and does five flips
>jumps on bank vault door
>jumps in front of you
>makes a joke about your weight
>swings from light fixtures
>throws his dumb stick which bounces on every surface before cracking your watch while you're checking it
>jumps on several more objects before kicking you in the ankle
>decide to pretend to be unconscious
>nightwing pokes you with his stupid fricking stick
>shrugs and waits for the cops
>fricks the latina detective over your unconscious body
go to blüdhaven they said.
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nightwing is shit and dick was only good as robin.
Dick should've been the one to die. Or Jason should've stayed dead. He's such a non character now.
Shit taste
wrong robin died
What are you? Fricking 60?
28
>he arrives like this instead
What changes?
the same except for the musk of sweaty wet fur
I sat wondering wtf i was looking at.
>Taylor
Ah. That explains so much.
He fricks a white detective now.
same but gets fricked a latino detective.
he fricks Bette Kane instead
this whole greentext. But fighting Spoder-Man instead of Nightwing
I'm not gonna say it
>he's still floating
I'm not gonna say it!
>still up there
I know you can hear me, jackass. I'm gonna shoot a guy if you don't just arrest me
>the big blue bastard grins
>you sigh.
Look. Up in the sky. It's Superman
>finally he comes down
>says something about picking on someone your own size
Look do we have to go through this every time?
>he puts his fists on his hips and continues to big bro you
>frick it. just get it over with
>shoot him in that stupid S
>bullets of course richochet everywhere causing a tire to pop and a window to break
>Superman laughs and asks if you're new in town
>certainly not
>hold the gun between two fingers hoping it won't hurt as much this time
>he close one eye and heat visions the gun so you drop it
>tells you to apologize to the nice man who you tried to rob
>the man has been reading a newspaper this whole time while Superman did his little show
>apologize and spread your arms so superman can lift you off to jail
I hate being in the silver age Metropolis
>i'm gonna shoot this guy if you don't come arrest me
>he grins
>both of you know he's faster than the bullet
>fricks the latina detective over your unconscious body
I agree that nightwing is an annoying homosexual but this is based I can't lie
Didn't Bludhaven get destroyed or something?
>down on your luck
>decide to rob a bank
moron thinking
It's a natural course of action in the DC universe. As long as you create a supervillain persona you won't stay in jail very long.
>1993
>decide to rob a bank
>hear a crash that must be superhero
Who, Robin??
>wearing some native American looking ass outfit
>Country singer ass haircut
>does some flips seems super serious
>Doesn't say anything
>Starts throwing you around
>Beats the shit out of you
>Stands there looking all conflicted
>Is he internal monologuing?
>you look confused
>He ties you to the side of tall building and leaves
Sometimes Cinemaphile decides to be the best board on the site, today is one of those days
>couldn't get a job at any of the closed down circus factories
>decide to do some goon work because I have to pay for my kid's medicine somehow
>just lookout duty, nothing messy
>hear a crash
>frickfrickfrickfrickfrick
>see the silhouette with the ears
Listen, you don't have to do anything, I surrender, I'm putting my gun do--
>feel my nose break and a couple teeth pop out
>there go a couple ribs
>goddamn, that probably caused some internal bleeding
>my knees? I wasn't even running
>okay, I think he's done, now the only question is will he leave me on the floor or--
>nope, tied to a streetlight upside down
I'm gonna figure out a way to move to Metropolis.
is that better or worse than getting dogpiled by his army of children
The kids can't hit as hard, they're more likely to challenge you to a fair fight, and they occasionally say something funny. Did have to get a batarang surgically removed once, but the bat does that too.
where is the funny?
>throws his dumb stick which bounces on every surface before cracking your watch while you're checking it
I chuckled
>supposed to be an easy peats arson job
>just burn down some israelite's antique shop
>seconds away from tossing a molotov through the window
>suddenly a giant red fricking light out of nowhere
MY FRICKING EYES!
>HELLO BOYS ISNT IT TOO LATE IN THE YEAR FOR FIREWORKS
>fricking head is in a vice can barely think with this bright ass light.
>can't even tell what the light is
>it's just red
>the idiot finally shuts it off
>but he's still talking
>can't move.
>sticky goop in my hair
>all on my clothes
>even in my socks
>gonna take months to get it all out
>stuck so i can't lower the hand which has the molotov still lit
>idiot is still talking as he swaggers over
frickin hurry my hand is burning!
>flips around several times before plucking the bottle up with his sticky palm
>guess the winter season made him cold because he sneezes through his mask
>webs me up to the side of a building
>police in New York have the response time of a turtle so by the time the get there the web dissolves and i'm hanging by my fingers on a 3 story ledge
>fast forward 3 months
>sent to prison hospital for constant nosebleeds
>diagnosed with cancer because of an exposure to radiation
>when the frick-
>ohhhh frick me
Say hello to New Yorks newest supervillain. Hemogoblin