Every Skywalker is a Palpatine

>inb4 Yidsney comic
Rewatch the opera scene in Episode III.

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  1. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Manipulating midichlorians to create life does not mean he is the father or any of his genetic material is in Anakin.

  2. 5 months ago
    sage

    >Yidsney comic
    The book said Plagueis did it, so that's what happened. Sorry homosexual

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Well, George's scripts said Sheev did it, so that's what happened. Sorry homosexual.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >The book
      See, the books are the adaptations in this case, since Star Wars was originally just a movie, so....yeaah, you're basically moronic. Sorry.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        He must be talking about the Plagueis book, which was different from the adaptation anyway.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      no it didn't.

      the plagueis novel states that anakin was created by the will of the force in response to the imbalance created by palpatine and plagueis. that's why it was so vital that palpatine corrupt him.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >10,000 Jedi = All is balanced
        >randomly two darkies appear = AHHHH FORCE SO IMBALANCED!
        >Force forcefully inseminates random slave woman so that she will give birth to the Chosen One
        >Anakin birthed = Ahhh, Force is mostly balanced
        >Guide Qui-gon to Anakin, he's a moron and gets killed
        >Darkies corrupt Anakin and kill all the Jedi = FORCE SUPER DUPER IMBALANCED!
        >Force thinks, "ah shit, wtf do I do now? Hmm, maybe I can use Anakin's kids or some shit goddamnit"
        >Everyone dies except Luke = Force Perfectly Balanced
        Bravo Lucas, amazing world building you got here

  3. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Every Skywalker is a Palpatine
    But not every Palpatine is a Skywalker.

  4. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    If Palpatine is Anakin's father, and Kylo Ren is Anakin's grandson, that makes him Palpatine's great grandson. Rey is the daughter of Palpatine's clone, so basically, genetically speaking, she is Palpatine's daughter. She fell in love with Kylo Ren, meaning that she fell in love with her own great nephew.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      get hired by lds son

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Incest is not new in star wars.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >It's like poetry, it rhymes

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      I bet reys mother was a clone of Shmi or some shit. Its why she is so moronic

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      yes, and?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      palpatine didn't touch Shmi's stomach and transfer his sperm like an nfc reader you fricking moron. Anakin has no father, he's basically a clone of Shmi with extra force potential because of all the midiclorians

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >actually believing these lies after all this time
        oh, you sweet naive little fool

  5. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Why do americans always draw a horrible female face in their comic?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Trying reading sandman

  6. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    In the Plagueis book, how and Palpatine do a ritual to tear a hole in the force and push more dark side energy into the light. It's successful, but they feel the force fight back in response and that was creating Anakin, he was just found and corrupted on the way to his true mission

  7. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    except it was palpatine's master that fiddled with the midichlorians in the force resulting in Anakin's birth not palpatine.

    but nice try

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      That ain't his master in OPs pic so your post is irrelevant moron

  8. 5 months ago
    Anonymous
    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Just According to Keikaku.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      I never really thought about it, but that's Kylo and Rey are cousins. That's weird. No wonder they didn't end up together like most people expected. Not that any of this shit was planned out to begin with though.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >planned out
        lol, nothing was planned out. They just paid 3 billion dollars to take a fat shit on the audience

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >nothing was planned out
          Exactly.

          your wall of sperg? nope

          >I CAN'T READ!
          And you have the nerve calling me "sperg."

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I CAN'T READ!
            I wont read your sperg wall, correct

            • 5 months ago
              Anonymous

              >I wont read your sperg wall
              Won't or can't? Since you don't seem to mind prequel defending, "can't" seems most likely.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >nothing was planned out.
          Yeah, that's what I said

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      isn't rey's father just a defect clone of sheev?

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Nope, he's Sheev's other son. But only girls matter now

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        the sequel novels are non canon because the writers had to scramble to cover the plot holes in the films
        whereas the novels based on the ot & pt are non canon because they were based on earlier drafts of the films and used ideas not present in the films or ever seen elsewhere in canon

        not canon

        >not canon
        motherfricker the entire concept of star wars started as journal of the whills, it's so goddamn canon i shit the bible

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          Speaking of the Whills, which take do you prefer?
          >Another Force order secretly watching the history of the galaxy unfold, chronicling key events in their eponymous journal
          or
          >More Midi-Chlorian crap

  9. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    the prequels are just as bad as disney's movies and I cannot understand why you people even care

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >the prequels are just as bad as disney's movies
      they arent. Though not great the prequels at least werent a rehash of the same stories. Plus George was good at creating new ship designs instead of the nostalgia bait we got with yidsney.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >they arent
        Yes, they are. A movie can still be equally bad for different reasons.
        Yes, TFA was a rehash, but it was still better written/directed/acted than any of the prequel movies.
        >George was good at creating new ship designs
        Way to just ignore Doug Chang and the rest of Lucasfilm's art team.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Way to just ignore Doug Chang and the rest of Lucasfilm's art team.
          way to strawman
          >better written/directed/acted
          lol no

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >they arent
      Yes, they are. A movie can still be equally bad for different reasons.
      Yes, TFA was a rehash, but it was still better written/directed/acted than any of the prequel movies.
      >George was good at creating new ship designs
      Way to just ignore Doug Chang and the rest of Lucasfilm's art team.

      sequel defending, ironic or unironic, is not permitted here. try r/starwars, it's where scum like you belong. now get the frick out of here with your disingenuous takes.

  10. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    No they aren't.
    But most importantly Rey isn't and never will be a Skywalker.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >What is adoption?

      >Way to just ignore Doug Chang and the rest of Lucasfilm's art team.
      way to strawman
      >better written/directed/acted
      lol no

      >lol no
      The sequels unironically have the best acting of the trilogies, anyone who pretends otherwise isn't actually judging the films on their own merits, they're just whining about some perceived slight or projecting some petty grievance onto the movies.
      If you try to argue that Hayden Christensen is a better actor than Adam Driver, who is literally probably the greatest male actor of the 21st century so far, you're either being dishonest or you're fricking moronic, possibly both.
      Daisy Ridley and John Boyega are better actors than Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher by a mile. Even removing Adam Driver from the equation, there is so much great talent in the sequels - Domnhall Gleeson, Oscar Isaac, Andy Serkis (even if the character is half-baked he's still great in TLJ) Lupita Nyongo (inb4 babies cry about Maz but defend Dexter Jettster and Jar Jar) Richard E Grant, etc.
      The prequels had some of the greatest actors of the time as well, but they were completely wasted because their scripts were written by an autistic robot eunuch.
      I have come to understand that most Star Wars fans legit have the 'tism and cannot distinguish between good and bad performances. For them it simply comes down to whether or not they like the character.
      >Is it character me like? (eg. Anakin, Kylo) Then actor good!
      >Is it character me no like? (eg. Rey, Finn) Then actor bad!

      [...]
      sequel defending, ironic or unironic, is not permitted here. try r/starwars, it's where scum like you belong. now get the frick out of here with your disingenuous takes.

      >sequel defending, ironic or unironic, is not permitted here.
      Yet prequel defending is?! If so, how about all of you frick off to r/Prequelmemes!

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >best acting of the trilogies
        from who? your blanket statements are full on moronic

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >from who?
          I take it you didn't actually read any of my comment.

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            your wall of sperg? nope

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Yet prequel defending is?
        yes, in the wake of disneyslop prequelposting is permitted since many realized what fools they were

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >many realized what fools they were
          For rightfully calling out George for assassinating cinema and raising a generation of moronic consoomers?

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            george did nothing wrong, idiots like you made vastly incorrect assumptions about the films and when you were proven wrong you cried like children

            Julian Glover, Peter Cushing, Ian McDiarmand, Christopher Lee, Ewan McGregor, Liam Neeson are just as good if not better than Adam Driver and Oscar Isaac.
            >The prequels had some of the greatest actors of the time as well, but they were completely wasted because their scripts were written by an autistic robot eunuch.
            This is somewhat true but the shit lines in the sequel trilogy weren't that much better. Gleeson especially suffered for his shit characterisation.
            >Daisy Ridley and John Boyega are better actors than Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher by a mile
            Extremely debatable. I can give you an even at best.
            [...]
            Sequel trilogy being trash doesn't make the prequel trilogy not trash.

            >Sequel trilogy being trash doesn't make the prequel trilogy not trash.
            you're right, but luckily the prequels were never trash in the first place

            • 5 months ago
              Anonymous

              >creates Intergalactic Stepin Fetchit himself, Jar Jar Binks
              >ruins little Jake Lloyd's life by making him a target of media criticism, geek outrage and schoolyard bullies
              >ruins filmmaking by popularizing the "filming 90% of the movie in greenscreen and CGI coating everything afterwards" method that Marvel would later perfect
              >raises an audience of dangerous man-children by framing a dangerous man-child as the all-important "Chosen One" of his saga
              >conditions young romantics for Twilight and other awful love stories with Anakin and Padme
              >hires Dave Filoni to turn everything that was cool into Jar Jar-tier cringe
              >retcons lore and fan favorite stories/characters that have been established for years, alienating the hardcore fans
              "George did nothing wrong."

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                let me fix that for you
                >creates a character that he wants to rival peewee herman but ultimately fails to do so
                >realistically portrays a child and people can't handle that so they ruin the actor's life
                >revolutionizes the industry for the second time and other filmmakers hop on the bandwagon
                >shows the audience that was young when the OT came out that the films were always intended for younger boys and they couldn't cope with the truth
                >portrays an awkward teenager who can't get his feelings correct
                >hires dave who is a yes man but can also write and filters george's ideas well enough for chuds like you to understand them better
                >takes fan favorite stories and bits and makes them canon

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                portrays a child
                Bart Simpson is a more realistic portrayal of a 10-year-old boy.
                the industry for the second time and other filmmakers hop on the bandwagon
                You're thinking of Spielberg and Cameron.
                an awkward teenager who can't get his feelings correct
                You're thinking of Sam Raimi's Peter Parker.

            • 5 months ago
              Anonymous

              >Overreliance on dodgy digital effects and greenscreen especially for locations and stunts
              >Constant overlong indulgent cartoony action scenes that fly in the face of the more grounded action of the old trilogy
              >Goofball comic relief characters more annoying than funny added for the kiddies seemingly
              >Way too many call-backs and references to the old trilogy as a crutch
              >Great actors cast but wasted in underwritten roles
              >Muddled and drawn-out storytelling lacking consistent direction with bloated runtimes
              >Strong production design and sound/score is lost amidst all this
              >turns Anakin into the most moronic character in all of Star Wars
              >Palpatine's plan is also moronic, making him look like a lucky idiot
              >All this makes the Jedi seem even more stupid
              >Obi Wan spends half the film on a sidequest chasing some saturday morning cartoon villain
              >Padme is no longer a real character like in TPM and AotC, but instead has nothing to do except stand around pregnant and die
              Your childhood favorite movies are trash. Deal with it.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Julian Glover, Peter Cushing, Ian McDiarmand, Christopher Lee, Ewan McGregor, Liam Neeson are just as good if not better than Adam Driver and Oscar Isaac.
        >The prequels had some of the greatest actors of the time as well, but they were completely wasted because their scripts were written by an autistic robot eunuch.
        This is somewhat true but the shit lines in the sequel trilogy weren't that much better. Gleeson especially suffered for his shit characterisation.
        >Daisy Ridley and John Boyega are better actors than Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher by a mile
        Extremely debatable. I can give you an even at best.

        >Yet prequel defending is?
        yes, in the wake of disneyslop prequelposting is permitted since many realized what fools they were

        Sequel trilogy being trash doesn't make the prequel trilogy not trash.

  11. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    That was my theory since I watched ROTS in 2005.

  12. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    sheev with the “i totally fricked ur mom” face

  13. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Palpatine didn’t actually create Anakin via the force. More specifically, Palpatine and Plagueis TRIED to create a being purely from the force and this failed, because the force effectively fought back by creating Anakin from immaculate conception. Hence him killing Sheev

    Think about it, how exactly do you think Sheev knowingly made Anakin but didn’t even know he existed before Qui Gon found him?

    Rey was just the biological product of Sheevs clone or something I don’t like the sequels

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      so the force is sentient? This shit is fricking moronic
      >I don’t like the sequels
      based. only homosexuals defend them

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >so the force is sentient? This shit is fricking moronic
        always been that way, look up the whills

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          not canon

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        The point is that there are multiple philosophies on the force, as you would expect from the fundamental religious element of the universe. Some say it reacts like a tipped scale, some say it's got a mind or life of its own, some say democratic, and the Sith have a host of their own philosophies. We can't form an objective understanding because it's too big for us to see.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          something doesnt need to be sentient to be reactive

          just go by what ben tells luke
          "it's an energy field that exists in all living things, it surrounds us, penetrates us, it binds the galaxy together"
          anon is too moronic to understand that everything was laid out in the first film and that each succeeding film expanded upon those few lines of dialogue. that's why israeliteisraelite went back to retread the "mysticism" aspect, because he felt that less = more and also had no clue how to write.

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            >each succeeding film expanded upon those few lines of dialogue
            More like corrupted it. It went from being mysterious, mystical and amazing to scientific and nonsensical to just dragonball z powers

            • 5 months ago
              Anonymous

              >It went from being mysterious, mystical and amazing to scientific and nonsensical to just dragonball z powers
              and again, it was always that way you ingrate.
              "i want to learn the ways of the force and become a jedi like my father" is no different than goku training to super saiyan. not only that but it also lays the foundation for midichlorians and inherently suggests that not only is the force in every living thing but also simultaneously reveals that children of force users have a natural advantage in learning how to use it. you're a fricking idiot and i hate homosexuals like you who refuse to listen to the fricking dialogue in movies and then complain how it was all ruined because your brain is too rotten from being a fricking homosexual someone dox this Black person right now and glitter bomb his ass.

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous
              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                yes, that reinforces what i said. the force is present in every living thing and anyone can learn to use it, but those born from strong force users learn faster. you know how musicians have children who also become musicians and they generally have similar skill sets? same with athletes. now take the L and have a nice day.

                portrays a child
                Bart Simpson is a more realistic portrayal of a 10-year-old boy.
                the industry for the second time and other filmmakers hop on the bandwagon
                You're thinking of Spielberg and Cameron.
                an awkward teenager who can't get his feelings correct
                You're thinking of Sam Raimi's Peter Parker.

                >Bart Simpson is a more realistic portrayal of a 10-year-old boy.
                bart simpson isn't a slave in a desert hellhole, moron.
                >You're thinking of Spielberg and Cameron.
                neither revolutionized the industry or even came close to what lucas accomplished with the OT
                >You're thinking of Sam Raimi's Peter Parker.
                peter has his shit in check, he just fails to act on it because of his superhero persona taking up all his free time.

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                >you know how musicians have children who also become musicians and they generally have similar skill sets? same with athletes.
                Oh, so your vision of the Force is just nepotisim? How is that a positive message of faith and spirituality?
                Really, The Force Unleashed and the Prequels combined ruined the Buddhist/Daoist-like mysticism of the Force. The OT more or less explicitly states that a Jedi uses the force to understand the universe and grow a spiritual connection to it and only uses their powers when absolutely necessary.
                >bart simpson isn't a slave in a desert hellhole
                Too bad Lucas didn't actually show any hardships of slavery or any suffering or bring up this plotline in any way whatsoever in the following films. It just happened, it was moronic, and it was completely forgotten. And according to him his "slave" life was supposed him being happy and careless child having a happy life. What gives? People keep b***hing about "slavery," did we even watch the same movie?
                Furthermore, in Episode II, Anakin was not supposed to be an awkward teenager.
                George wanted to flex his 1920's romantic movie knowledge and poor writing/directing skills. You are a pseud trying to justify something that Lucas himself admitted didn't work.

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                >Really, The Force Unleashed and the Prequels combined ruined the Buddhist/Daoist-like mysticism of the Force. The OT more or less explicitly states that a Jedi uses the force to understand the universe and grow a spiritual connection to it and only uses their powers when absolutely necessary.
                find me a moment in the force unleashed or the prequel trilogy where any of the characters used the force in an unnecessary manner. go ahead, i'll wait.

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                As Yoda himself said, "A Jedi uses the Force for knowledge and defense. NEVER to attack."

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                I would like to hear Baby Yoda's thoughts on the matter.

              • 5 months ago
                Anonymous

                yes i know the line, i told you to point out an instance in the PT or TFU where a jedi uses his weapon to initiate combat as opposed to acting in self-defense.

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            >less = more
            Yes, because NOBODY EVER WANTED OR NEEDED TO KNOW HOW THE FORCE WORKS! But spergs like you just want to over-analyze everything, and thanks to the midi-frickups, we now have to put with power level gays as well.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        something doesnt need to be sentient to be reactive

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      no it didn't.

      the plagueis novel states that anakin was created by the will of the force in response to the imbalance created by palpatine and plagueis. that's why it was so vital that palpatine corrupt him.

      this

  14. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >disney shit
    Not canon

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      yes it is. Stay mad.

  15. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Uh i thought the whole point of Plagueis was that he created Anakin through the force, making him the most powerful potential force user since he was created through midichlorian manipulation, and Palpatine simply latched onto him when they met? Was Plagueis now just some lackey that was in the way of Sidious' grand plan or something? Sidious couldve just created more force babies instead of coping with the cucked Vader he ended up with if Plagueis' life manipulation abilities weren't lost when he died

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      hes an offhand line. I remember multiple interviews where Lucas didn't consider books to be canon, or at least considered less canon than the movies long before the disney takeover

  16. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I always thought this, that Sidious manipulated the midchlorians to generate Anakin and have him as his disciple.

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