Favorite sketch?

Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68

UFOs Are A Psyop Shirt $21.68

Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68

  1. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    hot dogs

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      What can I do with about 140 hot dogs?

      I invited a lot of people over for the weekend, coworkers, friends, most initially said yes when I asked but now literally every one of them made up some excuse to not come today. The last person who was still supposed to come texted me that they're not feeling well

      I bought a lot for the party, the main stay was my hotdog feast, where I bought one pack of every kind of hotdog that they had at my local kroger. It was going to be fun, we all taste test the different hotdogs and determine which is the best.

      But now I just have a lot of hotdogs and heartbreak.
      Can I return them? Do stores accept that? They're not opened yet. If not, what else can I do with these, I don't really even like hotdogs that much

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        I really hope this is copypasta. otherwise your friends all hate you and you're a fricking loser. what you should do is go to every one of their houses and hide hotdogs in their downpipes, gutters, in the plants outside their windows, etc. get creative! they deserve it.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        there are far worse things than being hotdog rich anon. they keep for a long time. just keep them and enjoy those 'dogs on the reg

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Unless is costco you probs cant return them .Why would you have a hotdog feast if you dont like hotdogs? Just freeze most except two different packs at a time. Then eat them for various meals occasionally. I recommend you ditch any rolls then slice and boil them because theres alot of salt and oil but you can always grill a couple for dinner.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        how did i miss this
        if real, let me run some real Black person wisdom by you

        i can eat 2 hotdogs a day, day in day out, without getting sick of them
        your bread will last probably about 1.5 weeks, maybe 2.25 if you throw them in the fridge. we'll just say 16 days
        140/2 = 70. just go take the other half, the other 70, to a homeless shelter or food drive, it's over
        70 - (2 x 16) = 38. without buying any extra bread, before it all rots, you can get down at least 32 dogs
        take the last 38 to a dog shelter, or knock around on your neighbor's doors and ask if they want some packs of hotdogs. be real and say you got washed out for a party and literally cannot eat all of them before they'll go bad

        now here's how to make killer hotdogs
        >open up buns gently, get them flat
        >put them in the stove on a pan or straight on the rack if you aren't worried about cleaning up a little mess later - i always have a pizza stone sitting in there for convenience and easy cleaning
        >turn the broiler on to low if you've got the setting for it - if not, disregard all of this and toast them dry or with butter in a pan
        >let the inner, dog-side just start getting toasty
        >pull the rack out
        >sprinkle on as much cheese as you like or use slices
        >put back in enough for the cheese to melt, you can even turn off the broiler and let the residual heat do this part
        >stick dogs on (after microwaving, i wrap them in a napkin and put them in the microwave for 45 seconds usually)
        >let everything mingle for a minute and then if you like, add more cheese on top
        >take her out
        >again, no broiler? disregard above: flip the buns in the pan to dog-side up, lower or cut heat, add cheese, add dogs, and cheese
        >cover with flipped large pan, oven safe plate, or some sort of top
        >let cheese melt

        now you've got a perfectly serviceable dog. i like to make a honey mustard out of:
        >1.5-2 parts yellow mustard
        >1 part mayo
        >tablespoon or two of honey
        >generous amount of paprika and black pepper
        >mix
        >apply
        sorry bro

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          Unless is costco you probs cant return them .Why would you have a hotdog feast if you dont like hotdogs? Just freeze most except two different packs at a time. Then eat them for various meals occasionally. I recommend you ditch any rolls then slice and boil them because theres alot of salt and oil but you can always grill a couple for dinner.

          Repeating repeat digits of honor and peace

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        hot dogs are very versatile
        >hot dog fried rice
        >hot dogs and eggs
        >hot dog pizza
        >thinly-sliced hot dogs as a soup garnish
        >hot dogs and cheez its on a salad
        >hot dog charcuterie plate with cheese and pickles
        >hot dogs and mashed potatoes (very european)
        >hot dogs inside pita bread
        >cut the ends of the hot dogs and microwave them for octopus dogs!
        >hot dogs with white rice (not fried rice)
        >hot dog spaghetti with tomato sauce and parmesan
        >pbj hot dogs (peanut butter and jelly on a hot dog bun with a hot dog---it's good i swear!)
        >pea soup with hot dogs
        you can also try a lot of different toppings on hot dogs
        >mustard
        >relish
        >onion
        >french fried onion
        >pickle
        >hot peppers
        >tabouleh
        >hot sauce
        >butter
        >sesame seeds
        >hummus
        >any kind of nut butter
        >olive tapenade
        >sauerkraut
        >cheese
        >cheese sauce
        >chili
        >piknik potato sticks
        i would have loved to come to your hot dog party

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          we are so back hotdog bros

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      i always feel like hotdog timmy is directed at me personally

  2. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Balcony Jumpers

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      I still don’t get how drunk you have to be to fall off your own house balcony and die. Like it makes no sense to me. Maybe if it was like a few floors up apartment building I’d get it but I feel like people have fallen off of their house roofs and still lived.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        if you land on on your head you're dead from as little as half a metre.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          That’d be really shit luck. I’ve seen way too many videos on the internet of people falling way higher and just breaking some bones. Although I’ve heard people try to say he intentionally jumped.

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            My pet conspiracy theory is that he was pushed.
            Someone thought his jokes were a little too on the nose, like Kitty History or the entirety of High In Church and decided he needed to go.

            • 5 months ago
              Anonymous

              this might be the dumbest theory i've heard so far

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        He jumped all the time

  3. 5 months ago
    Anonymous
  4. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Abraham Lincoln. My buddies and i used to quote it all the time in undergrad
    >Listen to the woman John, just calm down!
    >Which one of y'all dead motherfrickers just said that shit?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous
      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        the combination of the accent, yelling in a theater, and the repeating of phrases and threats, its fricking insane they did this lol

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Abraham Lincoln. My buddies and i used to quote it all the time in undergrad
        >Listen to the woman John, just calm down!
        >Which one of y'all dead motherfrickers just said that shit?

        >SUCK MY PRESIDENTIAL wiener, b***h!

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        >STOP BREAKING MY BUCK!
        What did Lincoln mean by this?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      NOW YOU FRICKED UP
      YOU HAVE FRICKED UP NOW

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      for me it's the other lincoln sketch where they invert the dynamic.

  5. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'm gonna GRAPE you in the mouth

  6. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    PCP is a classic. The acting is great.

  7. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Was it gay?

  8. 5 months ago
    Anonymous
  9. 5 months ago
    Anonymous
  10. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Nail Gun
    Everest
    Pizza For Breakfast
    Songs of Olden Times

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      NAAILLL GUNNNN

  11. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Should have known you'd be here when I saw your Grave Digger monster truck parked in the driveway

  12. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    the unreleased skit where he JUMPS. there is video of him intentionally jumping. read the coroner report. he intentionally jumped.

  13. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    RIP FUTT BUCKERSON

  14. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    the popcorn factory

  15. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Gallon of PCP
    >Race War
    >My Parents are Divorced

  16. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    not my favorite but I always quote the JFK sketch when Trevor says "how ya doin how ya doin how ya doin" in imitation of JFK

  17. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    off the top of my head, and ones that haven't been mentioned already

    >nerf nuke
    >mountain of chairs
    >CD
    >job interview
    >reverse psychology

  18. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Nail Gun
    Sniper Business
    the greek sketch
    it still hurts bros

  19. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I've been thinking about the greek sketch a lot lately

    ?si=ZKyZXGX8TQE5cb-w
    but I still shout SATURDAY when I wake up saturday mornings
    >tfw I need to go back to work tomorrow

  20. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Thanks Fairy of Rationality, will I ever see you again?
    >I'm afraid not, you can't have both!

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      I never really liked that one

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Ok? You want a medal?

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        t. woman

  21. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Super-size me with Liquor and Black Doctor.

  22. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Who is the funniest cross dresser on the show and why is it Timmy?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Darren always looked the most like a woman.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Timmy has a naturally shrill voice, so it's a tossup.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Would.

  23. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Ass Pennies

  24. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Landline factory

  25. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >first episode
    how did they get away with this

  26. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    kid beer

  27. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    tartoast is a sleeper classic

  28. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I saw WKUK live in maybe 2013 and they showed a couple sketches that IFC refused to air. If anyone has the “bad sitcom audience” sketch you’d be my hero. I laughed until I pissed myself

  29. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >be me
    >watch wkuk commentary
    >season is over
    >zach the moment credits roll: time to play fallout 3
    >i now want to cry
    zoomers reading this, treat your time like gold and dont wait for shit to happen.

  30. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    how long could you possibly last only drinking whisky? wouldn't you die from dehydration even faster compared to drinking nothing at all?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      irish and scottish people have been living on only whiskey for generations anon. yeah you'll die in your 40's or 50's, probably.

  31. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Probably Lincoln, but Slow Jerk, Cubicle Guy and Sex Robot are side destroyers

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Holy frick thank you anon I haven’t thought of sex robot in a decade. Used to sing that in high school all the time. Gonna watch now

  32. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Yids in the Hall

  33. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Moon Bears is my favorite
    Slow jerk
    Whale tail
    Race war

  34. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    PCP is their masterpiece, but Landmine Factory gets me every time.
    It's Saturday and Strip Club Names were probably the ones my friends and I quoted the most.

  35. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >That stream where they talked about the stuff they used to do at live shows
    >They had Timmy pull his briefs down and flash his butthole to send the audience running out of the club
    >Darren would also be open to massage Timmy's dick during the show
    Man, I don't know if I'd watch that shit, but it sounds hilarious.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      saw them twice and they never did any gay shit

  36. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Street Peter or the one where Trevor is supposed to drive them to the moon but keeps spilling his snacks.

  37. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    W H A T D O E S H E W A N T~?

  38. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Lincoln sketch
    Partly due to the Ventrillo harassment

  39. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >I was never in any danger

  40. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'm a simple man, Sex Robot is the magnum opus.

  41. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I feel like Whale Tail is underappreciated
    >Only the one who will unite the wandering tribes of Mexico can do such a thing
    >Behold child, for I am he.
    I also love Pussy Salad and Band of Brothers.
    Band of Brothers is tops on delivery alone
    >IF YOU DONT STOP CRYING WE'LL TAKE YOUR PANTS OFF
    >AHHHHH DONT TAKE MY PANTS OFF

  42. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    why did they stop uploading the sketches to their channel. I get not doing the comentary but there are some great sketches they haven't uploaded yet

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *