Anon hobbit/man miscegenation is literally the canonical origin story of the English. >Orcs and goblins were eradicated after Sauron's destruction >the Elves sailed away >the Dwarves dug too deep >the Wizards and other celestial beings hid themselves >the Ents stopped moving and became normal trees >the Trolls turned to stone >the Hobbits and Men interbred and became modern Anglos
>Their only token black guy they can keep shitposting with, is from the Extended edition and is literally eating fried chicken in one split second scene.
You want him to eat a raw bird? And if he cooks it then it's automatically fried just to suit your stereotypes? The rest of the rangers and fellowship eat cooked game they hunted, you didn't start mocking them
>Samwise Gamgee: marries the girl who was his childhood friend, they have 13 children and live happily in his beloved Shire. >Samwell Tarly (arguably GRRM's self-insert): gets a damaged goods inbred girl, cucked with a baby she had with her father. He can't marry so all his eventual children will be bastards and he can't go back to his land.
What did GRRM meant by this?
George uses Sam to boost his ego. Sam caring about rape victims means George isn't a bad person for writing (and fantasizing) about the rapes. The fact that people still call Sam a coward after he proves his bravery justifies George's cowardice from dodging the draft.
kind, smart, decent, and devoted, a women seeks not these things. well unless she's a single mother with a biracial child, then she wants all those thing or unless she's walled in her mid 30s or early 40s.
>is married for 61 years >has multiple children >at the end of his life, he only thinks of his boyfriend who he lost after a great trauma
It's literally the ending of Titanic.
His wife passed away, his kids are grown and doing their own thing, he has the unique chance to go the the Undying Lands along with his old buds Gimli and Legolas plus see his pal Frodo after all that time. Why wouldn't he thrilled to take that opportunity? It's not like he's throwing away priceless gems either, his kids are inheriting all his stuff.
they weren't meant to be attractive. your brain is confused because peter jackson decided the fellowship should be cast exclusively with gay twinks and bears
>long term goal
He had none. He was acting out of pure and malicious spite, punishing the four Hobbits for the imaginary wrongs they had done him. Spurning at every turn the pity and mercy offered to him by nobler, better men. He didn't have anything planned beyond inflicting the maximum damage to the Shire in the shortest time.
And in the end it amounted to nothing thanks to Galadriel and Sam.
Bilbo leads Gandalf into Bag End, a house adorned with financial documents, stacks of cashs and precious metals. Gandalf has to stoop to avoid hitting his head on the low ceiling. Bilbo hangs up Gandalf's financial ledger on a peg and trots off down the hall.
BILBO >Investment portfolio? Perhaps something riskier... I've >a few bonds from the Old Market left, >1929...a very volatile year, almost as turbulent as >the stock market crash. They were acquired by my grandfather. >What say we analyze one, eh?
Bilbo disappears into the study as Gandalf looks around, enjoying the familiarity of Bag End. He turns, knocking his head on the antique lamp and then walking into the mahogany door frame. He groans.
BILBO >I was expecting you some time last fiscal quarter. >Not that it matters, you come and go as >you please, always have done, always will.
BILBO >You've caught me a bit unprepared, I'm >afraid...we've only got financial reports, a bit >of technical analysis, some tax reports here...ooh, no, >that might be a little too complex...
Gandalf stops in front of a framed financial forecast, slightly torn in one corner... it is a projection of market trends, Gandalf smiles to himself.
BILBO >Er, we've got investment strategies and audit reports... >got some ledgers somewhere. Not much for Returns, I'm afraid. >Oh no...we're alright! I've just found some budget spreadsheets.
Nice little data. Hope it's enough.
(comes into view)
I could do you some financial projections if you like...?
Bilbo jumps, a half-opened financial prospectus in his hand, as Gandalf mysteriously appears behind him.
GANDALF >Just a financial overview, thank you.
BILBO >Oh..right. You don't mind if...?
Bilbo opens a binder detailing his overseas assets
That wouldn't have demonstrated that the hubris of evil is what brings about eucatastrophe and destroys itself. The movie dilutes it a bit with having Frodo wrestle Gollum, but Sam pushing Frodo just removes that entire concept.
https://vocaroo.com/1iHvgMcO0kid >Hey dol! merry dol! ring a dong dillo!
Ring a dong! hop along! Fal lal the willow! >Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!
Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! My darling! >Light goes the weather-wind and the feathered starling.
Down along under Hill, shining in the sunlight, >Waiting on the doorstep for the cold starlight,
There my pretty lady is, River-woman's daughter, >Slender as the willow-wand, clearer than the water.
Old Tom Bombadil water-lilies bringing >Comes hopping home again. Can you hear him singing?
Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! and merry-o! >Goldberry, Goldberry, merry yellow berry-o!
Poor old Willow-man, you tuck your roots away! >Tom's in a hurry now. Evening will follow day.
Tom's going home again water-lilies bringing. >Hey! Come derry dol! Can you hear me singing?
Hop along, my little friends, up the Withywindle! >Tom's going on ahead candles for to kindle.
Down west sinks the Sun: soon you will be groping. >When the night-shadows fall, then the door will open,
Out of the window-panes light will twinkle yellow. >Fear no alder black! Heed no hoary willow!
Fear neither root nor bough! Tom goes on before you. >Hey now! merry dol! We'll be waiting for you!
Hey! Come derry dol! Hop along, my hearties! >Hobbits! Ponies all! We are fond of parties.
Now let the fun begin! Let us sing together!
>Now let the song begin! Let us sing together!
Of sun, stars, moon and mist, rain and cloudy weather, >Light on the budding leaf, dew on the feather,
Wind on the open hill, bells on the heather, >Reeds by the shady pool, lilies on the water:
Old Tom Bombadil and the River-daughter!
>hobbits succumb to magic forest and almost get assraped by trees >Bombadil appears, saves them, takes them home and tells them to be careful >hobbits leave and immediately succumb to magic graveyard and almost get assraped by wights
I know Tom is supposed to be cheerful but he must have been muttering "for frick's sake" under his breath that second time.
one day
one life
Sam hates his life and misses having friends.
he got to go to the Undying Lands
Proof that poltards are always wrong.
obsessed
this is what the aliens in "they live" wanted for every male, they were so evil
>Only two kids
Hobbits are going to be replaced by Haradrim
Sam had 13 kids
And one of them was eaten by bears.
Did human men ever marry hobbit women in Middle Earth?
Pretty sure the books mention half-hobbits living in the areas around the Shire but maybe a loregay can confirm.
Anon hobbit/man miscegenation is literally the canonical origin story of the English.
>Orcs and goblins were eradicated after Sauron's destruction
>the Elves sailed away
>the Dwarves dug too deep
>the Wizards and other celestial beings hid themselves
>the Ents stopped moving and became normal trees
>the Trolls turned to stone
>the Hobbits and Men interbred and became modern Anglos
The Hobbits were almost hunted into extinction by Men causing them to go into hiding.
/misc/ would probably have the hobbits exterminated
No, /misc/ agrees that the orcs and the urukai are allegories for blacks and other coloreds.
accept Orcs and Urukai are the Prussians, or the all encompassing and nebulas invading horde
learn your fricking history
as the official representative of /misc/ I can say that we all gravitated on hating one specific character
It was a different time.
A-a-are those t-t-TWO black people??
I'M GOING INSANE AHHHHHHHHH
Up pick
>Everybody is human
Down pick
>There's two orcs posing as humans
seethe brownboi seethe!
that homie zesty as frick
>Their only token black guy they can keep shitposting with, is from the Extended edition and is literally eating fried chicken in one split second scene.
You want him to eat a raw bird? And if he cooks it then it's automatically fried just to suit your stereotypes? The rest of the rangers and fellowship eat cooked game they hunted, you didn't start mocking them
holy cope
SOVL vs soulless
kino intro
they looks so dysgenic and subhuman in the bottom picture. who keeps casting these mutants and why doesn't the general population reject them?
Is that Lovecraft?
Orlando Bloom is so hot
Ywnbaw
>Samwise Gamgee: marries the girl who was his childhood friend, they have 13 children and live happily in his beloved Shire.
>Samwell Tarly (arguably GRRM's self-insert): gets a damaged goods inbred girl, cucked with a baby she had with her father. He can't marry so all his eventual children will be bastards and he can't go back to his land.
What did GRRM meant by this?
George uses Sam to boost his ego. Sam caring about rape victims means George isn't a bad person for writing (and fantasizing) about the rapes. The fact that people still call Sam a coward after he proves his bravery justifies George's cowardice from dodging the draft.
I can't believe that fatfrick managed to dodge anything
kind, smart, decent, and devoted, a women seeks not these things. well unless she's a single mother with a biracial child, then she wants all those thing or unless she's walled in her mid 30s or early 40s.
>From the twisted mind of Ingmar Bergman
>Stockholm 2023
>Black folk and hijabs
They were already importing poles in 1955. You people are so fricking dumb.
and yet Sweden didn't become one of the most sexually violent nations in europe until the last ten years. Turns out polish people are the problem
Is that true? That sounds like a really big problem the adults in government should figure out.
>Turns out polish people are the problem
Yes.
Either go 100% on your ethnostate utopia or don't even bother bringing it up, dipshit.
bros how do you time travel
>The nigress below doesn't even know of Hamlet, she'd think it's a frozen tv dinner.
Sam had best ending
The best and most wholesome ending of any modern movie.
What a horrifying wh*te nightmare vision, makes me feel sick and shaky
Where is the Wal-Mart, or the McDonald’s?
LotR is so good
Cutie family.
>is married for 61 years
>has multiple children
>at the end of his life, he only thinks of his boyfriend who he lost after a great trauma
It's literally the ending of Titanic.
Your deranged mind is an example of why homos should be put to death.
His wife passed away, his kids are grown and doing their own thing, he has the unique chance to go the the Undying Lands along with his old buds Gimli and Legolas plus see his pal Frodo after all that time. Why wouldn't he thrilled to take that opportunity? It's not like he's throwing away priceless gems either, his kids are inheriting all his stuff.
>old buds Gimli and Legolas
lol
they were work acquaintances with mutual respect at best
Go back to your Marvels thread. Be better.
>I will draw Sam as ugly as I possibly can
they weren't meant to be attractive. your brain is confused because peter jackson decided the fellowship should be cast exclusively with gay twinks and bears
Are they meant to look ugly and repulsive? He drew Rosie as normal-looking.
They are Anglo Saxon farmers. They aren't going to be attractive.
see
Yes. Have you ever been to rural England?
Cite the passage in which it is stated that Sam has a physically ugly face.
Ted Nasmith sucks at drawing people but his landscapes are by far the best of the bunch. Such a crying shame he wasn't available for the films.
Californians look at this and literally see a million problems.
The hobbits were pretty old too by the time of LOTR
what was sharkies long term goal here?
Setting up the tobacco industry.
Scoure the shire. Enslave the men, impregnate the women. Get revenge on those little midges. And it worked out well for a while too.
>long term goal
He had none. He was acting out of pure and malicious spite, punishing the four Hobbits for the imaginary wrongs they had done him. Spurning at every turn the pity and mercy offered to him by nobler, better men. He didn't have anything planned beyond inflicting the maximum damage to the Shire in the shortest time.
And in the end it amounted to nothing thanks to Galadriel and Sam.
you just know
>manlet bukake
everything about the lotr trilogy really is kino
They ran a Grond over her
>wooow mountains so heckin cool and trad
the Alps are full of arabs and Black folk nowadays just like any other part of the West
>sees a beautiful vista
>immediately starts trying to demoralize
bunkercucks are very strange
It's almost mind-breaking that places like these still exist.
Bilbo leads Gandalf into Bag End, a house adorned with financial documents, stacks of cashs and precious metals. Gandalf has to stoop to avoid hitting his head on the low ceiling. Bilbo hangs up Gandalf's financial ledger on a peg and trots off down the hall.
BILBO
>Investment portfolio? Perhaps something riskier... I've
>a few bonds from the Old Market left,
>1929...a very volatile year, almost as turbulent as
>the stock market crash. They were acquired by my grandfather.
>What say we analyze one, eh?
Bilbo disappears into the study as Gandalf looks around, enjoying the familiarity of Bag End. He turns, knocking his head on the antique lamp and then walking into the mahogany door frame. He groans.
BILBO
>I was expecting you some time last fiscal quarter.
>Not that it matters, you come and go as
>you please, always have done, always will.
BILBO
>You've caught me a bit unprepared, I'm
>afraid...we've only got financial reports, a bit
>of technical analysis, some tax reports here...ooh, no,
>that might be a little too complex...
Gandalf stops in front of a framed financial forecast, slightly torn in one corner... it is a projection of market trends, Gandalf smiles to himself.
BILBO
>Er, we've got investment strategies and audit reports...
>got some ledgers somewhere. Not much for Returns, I'm afraid.
>Oh no...we're alright! I've just found some budget spreadsheets.
Nice little data. Hope it's enough.
(comes into view)
I could do you some financial projections if you like...?
Bilbo jumps, a half-opened financial prospectus in his hand, as Gandalf mysteriously appears behind him.
GANDALF
>Just a financial overview, thank you.
BILBO
>Oh..right. You don't mind if...?
Bilbo opens a binder detailing his overseas assets
GANDALF
>No, not at all.
It would’ve been 1000% better if Sam was forced to push Frodo into Mount Doom at the end.
That wouldn't have demonstrated that the hubris of evil is what brings about eucatastrophe and destroys itself. The movie dilutes it a bit with having Frodo wrestle Gollum, but Sam pushing Frodo just removes that entire concept.
https://vocaroo.com/1iHvgMcO0kid
>Hey dol! merry dol! ring a dong dillo!
Ring a dong! hop along! Fal lal the willow!
>Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!
Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! My darling!
>Light goes the weather-wind and the feathered starling.
Down along under Hill, shining in the sunlight,
>Waiting on the doorstep for the cold starlight,
There my pretty lady is, River-woman's daughter,
>Slender as the willow-wand, clearer than the water.
Old Tom Bombadil water-lilies bringing
>Comes hopping home again. Can you hear him singing?
Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! and merry-o!
>Goldberry, Goldberry, merry yellow berry-o!
Poor old Willow-man, you tuck your roots away!
>Tom's in a hurry now. Evening will follow day.
Tom's going home again water-lilies bringing.
>Hey! Come derry dol! Can you hear me singing?
Hop along, my little friends, up the Withywindle!
>Tom's going on ahead candles for to kindle.
Down west sinks the Sun: soon you will be groping.
>When the night-shadows fall, then the door will open,
Out of the window-panes light will twinkle yellow.
>Fear no alder black! Heed no hoary willow!
Fear neither root nor bough! Tom goes on before you.
>Hey now! merry dol! We'll be waiting for you!
Hey! Come derry dol! Hop along, my hearties!
>Hobbits! Ponies all! We are fond of parties.
Now let the fun begin! Let us sing together!
>Now let the song begin! Let us sing together!
Of sun, stars, moon and mist, rain and cloudy weather,
>Light on the budding leaf, dew on the feather,
Wind on the open hill, bells on the heather,
>Reeds by the shady pool, lilies on the water:
Old Tom Bombadil and the River-daughter!
>hobbits succumb to magic forest and almost get assraped by trees
>Bombadil appears, saves them, takes them home and tells them to be careful
>hobbits leave and immediately succumb to magic graveyard and almost get assraped by wights
I know Tom is supposed to be cheerful but he must have been muttering "for frick's sake" under his breath that second time.
>*hits pipe*