>Gandalf could we use your gunpowder to make weapons to save Middle-earth? Rockets and bombs would be pretty nice against invading orcs...
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>Gandalf could we use your gunpowder to make weapons to save Middle-earth?
Lotr is one of those fantasy settings where they are stuck in the same technology tier for a couple of thousand years now.
It's primitive britain that's why.
i thought it was hawaii
the Shire is primitive Britain
the South is like the Caribbean I guess with the pirates and all that. Maybe you'd find coconuts there. I mean there are elephants the size of dump trucks in the East so who knows
Umbar is more like Constantinople and turkey
thanks for the information. cancelling my trip to Umbar now.
>primitive Britain
AKA pre-Islamic Britain
xDD
Tolkien is simply anti industrial revolution
>Lotr is one of those fantasy settings where they are stuck in the same technology tier for a couple of thousand years now.
Sauron was building ironclads and ICBMs thousands of years ago.
The dwarves have an actual excuse though.
Whenever they would build up their great cities and amass wealth it would draw the attention of a dragon that would frick their shit up. The dwarves would then have to move to the next mountain and restart the process over the centuries.
Elves on the other hand are just Black folk that don't care about anything, since they can just move and live with the Gods whenever they get bored in Middle Earth.
And yet they have food from the Americas.
Just like IRL
By the time the story begins in LoTR, the world has already gone through
>The Arda Marred
>War of the Powers
>Ungoliant devours the Two Trees
>Beleriend sinking
>Numenour sinking and Allah reshaping the whole world from a large flat disc to a small sphere the exact size of Earth, with a third of it breaking off but with all its settlements intact and a teleport feature for white-listed persons
...Which is five biblical apocalypses, and there's still literal monsters, primordial beings, and evil spirits on more than half the entire land area with more wars creating more of them. It's impressive they're not all on the same level as the wildmen Dunlenders and northmen.
and yet they went through a thousand years of relative peace where nothing happened at all. No renaissance, no exploration, no industrial revolution, nothing. Not a single smart person existed in the entire universe. No tinkerers, no inventors, no artists, nothing.
Say want you want about the other races but man gets shit done. Elves can be hippies, Dwarves can be greedy miners, Hobbits can be the Amish but man innovates, creates, builds, and conquers, it's fundamental to human nature and this just doesn't exist in LotR.
Frick you all they should have moon bases by the time Frodo get's the ring.
i asked that question more than the gay ass eagles
they wouldnt even need the fellowship
just load up a few bombs and loose
minas tirith would be a cakewalk, the ghosts and the riders would be hours late
the correct answer is that she does want to be raped. that second guy is dumber than the first
The second sperg completely misses the point, while implying that he has higher intelligence. Sad. Many such cases.
Pseuds btfo
>I so don't care that I can't shut up
By this logic you can't criticize any faulty logic in any entertainment.
you don't use logic to criticize art do you. there's no logic
second guy is even pseudier
he probably didn't have enough time to manufacture enough of that shit for a whole army
cakewalk is a racist term, please dont use it anymore
Cause Black folk all get that type 2?
>Unfortunately Pippin, gunpowder is all good and well but it's of no use without the metallurgical technology to make barrels strong enough to reliably shoot projectiles without exploding and killing the user so the very concept of a "gun" being the namesake of "gunpowder" is preposterous
>So maybe you should go take a long draw on your pipe, eat a potato and shut the frick up you no good stupid fricking holbytler
are you telling me the elves or drawves would not have been able to forge a steel barrel?
maybe they could but they should've invented the concept of gun first. they have seen fireworks, supposedly made of gunpowder, so it doesn't seems much of stretch to just pile that stuff into a larger container to make a weapon-tier explosion. a gun and projectiles are on another conceptual level
honor prevented them from using explosives
You don't need strong barrels or even metal to make bombs, you can make bombs out of fricking clay if you need to.
So you can have magical elven claymores but somehow it's impossible to make a crude barrel strong enough to forge into a cannon?
you can make effective hand grenades out of ceramic you actual idiot.
> he said calmly
If you can make bells, you can make cannons. Ask the turks in constantinople.
Realistically, they could've made bombs and hand grenades. Tbh I suspect there's some autistic rule against Gandalf weaponizing his skills like that, he uses fire as a personal weapon yes, but creating weapons for others is probably banned.
Saruman made a bomb for Helm's Deep
Sauronman wasn't following the rules at that point though. Hence he gets his shit slapped in, rebelling against omnipotent creator god rarely ends well.
a. isn't that movie only?
b. saruman literally used up every ounce of magic he had making the bomb and the orc army, hence he has jack shit left when he loses at helms deep and gets his shit kicked in by hobbits
a. no, there were more bombs or "blasting fires" in the books. The movies had just one.
here's three quotes from Helm's Deep alone.
>Blasts of fire leaped up from below shaking the stones. Grappling-hooks were hurled, and ladders raised. Again and again the Orcs gained the summit of the outer wall, and again the defenders cast them down.
>But the Orcs laughed with loud voices; and a hail of darts and arrows whistled over the wall, as Aragorn leaped down. There was a roar and a blast of fire. The archway of the gate above which he had stood a moment before crumbled and crashed in smoke and dust. The barricade was scattered as if by a thunderbolt. Aragorn ran to the king’s tower.
Sauronman gave his orcs gunpowder. They turned into suicide bombers.
>probably banned
this would make sense, it would explain why the evil wizard made bombs for his orc army (because he doesn't care whether it's banned) while Gandalf couldn't because he was a nerd who followed the rules.
although idk if that was in the books.
This. I get that they're supposed to like guardian angles, sort of guides/mentors and not interfeering too directly with the world, but in this case I'd rather have Sauronman as my mentor
Saruman was more powerful, but he was also a shut-in nerd with delusions of grandeur, and I think his company would get old fast
Sauronman was corrupted. He wasn't supposed to give any kind of knowledge like that to others.
>guardian angles
That's an acute observation, but you're a bit obtuse if you can't see Saruman's obvious flaws.
He’d make an orc rape you
2-3 more of these and they would have won
bro that thing was fricking powerful, imagine catapulting them in inside the keep
why did they never use this again?
you're not supposed to ask questions like this
I suppose that it was difficult and expensive for some reason. The only thing that makes sense is that Saruman had only resources for one bomb and that was his ace. After all, he did do other high risk, high reward moves like sending every uruk he had to Helm's Deep as soon as they were ready, instead of sieging and letting them starve in that fortress. Saruman was pressed for time so he just threw everything at the wall. His desperation drove him to cut down Fangorn despite knowing there could be retaliation from the Ents.
Why didn't Sauron make bombs? His domain was literally made of sulfur.
IIRC there were multiple bombs; the reason it's only used the one time is that there was only one weakness in Helm's Deep, and Saruman and the Uruks ceased to exist after that.
>Saruman Manhattan project
Surprising move for Tolkien to have the most technologically advanced party lose
Making the industrial powerhouse lose was the fantasy for Tolkien
I love the book but Tolkien sounds like a dick
The bomb was planted inside a sewer/runoff canal that went under the walls. They could put another bomb but would have to dig a tunel underneath.
>They could put another bomb but would have to dig a tunel underneath.
So? Mining under walls was a mainstay of medieval siege-craft.
this was the middle earth equivalent of the manhattan project. they spent years refining the material and only had one shot.
I think they did, in the books. There were explosions heard from the outer fortifications of Minas Tirith (which weren't even depicted in the movies).
>why did they never use nukes again?
Chapter 4 of The Return of The King: The Siege of Gondor.
Arguably Grond could have also made use of explosives, since it blasted the gates with a great flash and booming sound.
The reagents were too expensive
>only makes a single bomb and spends the rest of the resources on making a giant battering ram shaped like a wolf
Saruman the wise? more like Saruman the furry
You'd just need a few of these and some young impressionable hobbits to illuvatar akbar the Black Gate
>illuvatar akbar
Why didn't Sauron just have Saruman produce a few of those and sneak a few into Minas Tirith?
That is a fricking awesome special effect.
Tolkien doesn't like technology. It would be convenient to send a fleet of eagles to nuke Barad-dur, right.
this is the only reason
>fireworks are fun/cute entertainment for kids
>NOOOO YOU CAN'T USE THE SAME TECH TO BLOW UP MY SQUAD IN WW1 THAT'S INDUSTRIALIST
it's an actual worldbuilding hole considering Sauron doesn't just use a bomb to blow up the gates of Minas Tirith, have Nazgul drop them, etc
>IT'S EXPLAINED IN THE BOOK AND SUBSEQUENT FAN FICTION
the defenders of this trash will come screaming
>we are the good guys and we need to exterminate the bad guys
Uh, fascist much?
Test
C+
why didn't they drop bombs from the eagles?
Tie me to an eagle and launch it at Mount Doom (it's in Tel-Aviv), I'm ready!
guns are for gays
Flaming arrows with a small sack of gunpowder tied to them would have come in handy against the Balrog, Nazgul, Uruk Hai and GROND.
have recently rewatched the trilogy, the grima + saruman scenes are some of my favorites
i think most of the EE scenes deserved their place on the cutting room floor, but its such a shame they cut the Saruman/Grima scene from ROTK
Why didn’t they just ride the eagles to Mt Doom and shoot fireworks into the sky as they entered the region to create confusion and cover? They could’ve even used one of the dragon fireworks for maximum effect. Maybe even shoot the fireworks at the Nazgûl. Gandalf could even use his shining light trick if they got close. They could be in/out in less than 10 minutes.
what song would they be blaring as they flew to Mt Doom?
The Look by Roxette
Love Is A Battlefield by Pat Benetar
The Police - Wrapped Around Your Finger
It Ain't Me
The fireworks are explicitly identified as being magic in The Hobbit
I think that's what hobbits called it but it's actually gunpowder.
>But, of course, Gandalf had made a special study of bewitchments with fire and lights (even the hobbit had never forgotten the magic fireworks at Old Took's midsummer-eve parties, as you remember).
I always thought Saruman stole his bomb tech from Gandalf
he fights off the wolves in fellowship by grabbing a large branch that he bursts into flames. also starts a fire magically to save them from freezing in a blizzard. so clearly he can ignite / explode things. too bad he didn't know about gunpowder. would've amplified his powers.
Gunpowder that forms a dragon that also redirects midair.
The Chinese invented gunpowder centuries before anyone else and they only used it for fireworks.
They used it in warfare as well
>he doesnt know about the Orifice-Penetrating-Moon-Spear and Fast-As-Heaven-Rocket
>Oh sure, let me just get my vast supply of saltpetre that I have on me while we're frantically marching all over the place.
>Oh wait, it's stuck in Radagast's beard. Never mind.
Ents are colossal incels
Gandalf's fireworks were mostly magical in nature.
The pine cones he throws in the hobbit explode too and they're just plucked out of a tree
Those technologies would also divide men and lead to more conflict, long after Mordor is defeated. Gandalf takes a longer view.
Bring a wagon full of gunpowder to a hamlet and earn the title "Disturber of peace"
Why didn't they just nuke Mordor?
They discuss why they can't just nuke Mordor (the one ring = nuke) at length in the movies. The person using the nuke would just become a tyrant worse than Sauron to fill the vacuum, just like what happened in real life with Germany/Japan and America.
Nuclear devices were banned under the treaty of 1440 of the Third Age
If you kill your enemies they win
Oppenheimer was busy
> just leave the recipe lying around for someone to steal.
Surely this would get around the helping the mortals ban.
Gandalf we need to make orifice-penetrating flying sand magic mist tubes!
"Stop using meta knowledge, Sam. You're not a time traveler with perfect knowledge of and the ability to recreate the industrial revolution."
Don't worry about it too much; it's a franchise made for kids. The world-building collapses pretty early on
1/10, Black person. Here is your (you.)
If it's ok for adults to watch anime, it's acceptable to watch lotr
Why didn't they just build a rocket and fire the ring into the sun?
They are still busy studying Legolas’ physics
People REALLY seem to have a problem with the concept that Wizards (Angels sent from Heaven) actually have rules about what they can and can't do and that breaking those rules can have severe negative consequences for them that aren't immediate but occur over time. Interesting.
I stand with the Hobbits.
Mordor/orks are literally the representation of XX industrial society and ideologies that accompanied it. Fighting XIX century hobbit/elf tradition gays. Remember how Tolkien mentions how hobbit hate complicated devices?
So it would be counter productive to use science. Technology is the force of evil in lotr.
Why didn’t frodo just put his penis inside the ring?
>yes, of course! I, the angel sent to guide the peoples of this world through the trials against darkness ahead, should freely distribute the knowledge of gunpowder to the corrupted and lost souls of men in these dark and uncertain times! What harm could possibly come from introducing this enormous power into a world where the hood people are desperate and beleaguered and willing to use almost any weapon they can get to defeat the forces of evil. Certainly those who have such power will not abuse it to their own ends later!
the orchestra literally use a bomb to great effect