>girl gives you this look and says she’s “scared of the dark”
>offer to get your nightlight
Did Bobby have autism or was he just gay
Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
>girl gives you this look and says she’s “scared of the dark”
>offer to get your nightlight
Did Bobby have autism or was he just gay
Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
Neither. He was a nervous 13 year old boy.
13 is a right age to be fingering chicks
nah, it's best if you start fingering them as soon as they start jerking off (~5 years old)
True, I worked at a movie theatre and say a little kid flicking her bean when she left the bathroom with her mom. Was a ticket taker that night.
white person moment
Brown mudslime detected, just because MAPhomed did that 1000 years ago doesn't make it ok for you to do it today
Actually he was 12 during this episode
Did you even watch the show?
maybe he was just smart about avoiding ethnikettes
chad problems, you wouldn't understand
>Bobby
>Chad
>quite literally grovels and humiliates himself to get back with her
>humiliates himself to get back with her
connie is a bawd
I missed out on young love
I didn't but haven't loved anyone or anything since, feel like topping myself haha.
I experienced it and it’s even worse. Back then in HS girls were less bitter and fun to talk to, and trying to date now women are just c**ts or walled or want you to be their step dad. I wish I could go back, bros.
This. They used to be so fun and airy but once they go off to college I think it gives them a false sense of importance.
Here's some advice: dating in your 30s is a miserable, garbage experience. So don't wait until your 20s are over and ask women out. Even if you fail, you'll still have that experience guiding you to the next one. Everyone single in their 30s is burned out from overwork, has kids with some douchebag, got burnt in past relationships, don't really want to date but don't want to be alone either, pessimistic as frick, it just sucks
Men in their 30s can pick up prime poontang like it's nothing
>burned out from overwork
>got burnt in past relationships
>don't really want to date but don't want to be alone either
>pessimistic as frick
That's me at 26. I think it's over
if you're a guy in his 30's then there's a simple workaround, just date women in their 20's
not as easy if you're a woman, can't help but feel bad for them
So did I. Adult love, too.
There’s always elderly love
I'm not joining your lemon party.
i had a gf when i was 14 and then decided i wanted to play on the computer instead of getting another one
yeah me too I preferred to play video games to going out and she eventually dumped me
i broke up with her before i decided i wanted to be a lone wolf gamer. one of my sisters friends asked me to date a few years later and i said no lol
oh well. now mom is the only gal for me
im doing both
hell yeah brother. When I was like 13 I passed up an invite from my oneitis to hangout on a Friday evening, for a night of gaming with the boys. Played a shit load of Gundam on PS2, KOTR, red alert 2, good shit.
Bazed
lol I had a girl who in hindsight was really into me and clearly flirting with me, and instead of picking up on it I played Final Fantasy Tactics for 6 hours in my bedroom alone.
Ya winnin' son?
I unironically forgot I had a date with a chick once because I was busy posting on Cinemaphile
Stay based king
Basado
same, starting to get bored of computer now though. maybe time to go back to gf, but its a whole different game from 12 years ago
I didn't and I had a lot of sex and relationships during my 20s. Still ended up alone and on Cinemaphile at this very moment.
I didn't, but I did miss out on requited love.
I had young love it was kinda great in an awkward way, we did nothing just hold hands and we felt more but that's were we stopped.
We left each other and I found a new girl in high school, several girls. I was the only mexican in an all white school ot was so easy to talk to white girls. Now I'm married with kids loving life. It's so easy.
>get the courage to ask the neighbor girl is she wants to “hang out” sometime when I was 14
>get told she doesn’t see me that way
I haven’t asked a girl out for 13 years now
I’d rather have not even tried
>gets rejected in the most tame way possible
>HOLY FRICK IM A BROKEN HUMAN BEING
oh my science so much this
Sneedthing
If at first you don't succeed, never try again. That's the saying, right?
I dated a girl in high school when I was 16 and she was 15 and 3 months into dating she told me she was molested by her uncle so I broke up with her
Damn, same thing happened with me and my niece
Was she latina?
No just a weeb white girl back in the mid 2000s, she said she was molested when she was 12 and I got out of there because I didn’t want to be burdened with that At that age
Smart, it’s not a good idea to date your niece.
i didnt find love til I was 18 but by then I was so desperate for it that I turned that gf into my wife
18 is not notably late, chad.
missed out on young love
missed out on adult love
missing out on old love
So did 97% of ppl on this board that’s why they’re so angry all the time. It’s also why they hate women and constantly bang on about trad-gf’s or whatever they call it.
Same. I literally had girls explicitly tell me they wanted to frick but I was such an autist that I thought surely they're just being edgy. They were not. It's for the best though, married a virgin and neither of us have baggage.
handsome people don't suffer
actually worked with a cripple a few years ago at some retail job. he showed me photos and videos of him before the events that made him crippled. complete 10/10. now he shits in a funnel and gained 150 lbs. there is always suffering, some small some big
I WANT YOU TO SHOOOOOOOOW MEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I missed out on young love, but imo the best ages to get a gf are 17~19. You have enough freedom to frick around and not enough responsibilities to want to have a nice day.
i'm 24 years old and i've never had a girlfriend
Don't feel bad. You also missed out on having your heart broken
I'm 33 and have never even been on a date.
I missed out on all love, if I ever meet a woman at 32 I don't think I'll truly love her and if I do it'll be tainted with bitterness at how women showed no interest in me in my youth.
Same. I'm 20 years old and I hate the fact that I'm going to end up like everyone else in this thread in my 30s. I think the only time a girl has ever been interested in me was when I was like 10, but I didn't really understand what was going on back then. Frick man, I wish I was born normal
You have a lot of time dude. First step is get Cinemaphile. Then go find an apprenticeship and learn a trade. Learn some game and practice on tinder fatties. Then start going to church and use your skills to pick a good churchgirl to marry. Or else just sit on Cinemaphile complaining for the next decade.
I wish it was that easy. I'm too socially inept (and just generally inept at everything). Combine that with the fact that I lacked growth hormones so I ended up 5'3, with a tiny penis and the voice of a kid that's just started puberty. I can't fricking live like this. I hate telling people that I'm not in fact 14 years old and am a grown ass man. There's no fix to it, I'm stuck like this forever
you gays really got brainwashed by hollywood
young love doesn't exist and if it does it is such a rare outlier too
these are the same people that believe that everyone loses their virginity on prom night and high school life for normies is just like american pie
I had it but I took it for granted because my autistic ass was just rolling with the punches
same, it was also right within my grasp
He was pathetic.
bobby deserved to be beaten for this
He was legitimately fine before Bill poisoned his mind with pessimism and desperation. It only took a few days of his parents keep Bill away from him and an hour with Boomhauer to turn him normal again. Be careful about who you letting your mind get infected by the wrong people.
>I'm your little candy man
What being deprived of Laotian dicky does to a MF
>He was pathetic.
It's crazy that if King of the Kill came out today he'd be slandered as an incel and probably not even be allowed to go to school until he has proven that he has had sex.
This innately my instinct with love. Thank CHRIST ALMIGHTY I watched King of the Hill to know that acting like Bill or Bobby is wrong or else this would be my automatic response to heartbreak. Just went through a break up and the urge to act this way is stronger than a salmon's to swim upstream and spawn. I am blessed to know that pain is inevitable and not to deal with it by breaking down like this. I unironically listened to Hank Williams while crying though.
>this would be my automatic response to heartbreak
I'm the opposite. There's something bitter in me, when I face rejection I immediately turn against whoever rejected me. Had a girlfriend dump me in highschool, she called wanting to get back together a week later and I told her it was over. Maybe it's a pride thing, if someone turns against me I lose all good feelings for them right away, no second chances.
you wouldnt understand a mind that isnt corrupted by pornography.
you can call it autism if you want.
Bitches come and go but propane is forever
didn't this voice actress steal money from her kickstarter for some moronic 'not-koth' video game?
>It's another bobby has a raging boner and has to solve problems on the board episode
What were they thinking?
Bobby "The hog" HIll
Tangentially related, I have always hated female double-speak. If you want to get frisky, then just make a fricking move, don't drop a vague hint about being "scared of the dark" or "being cold" just lean over and plant one on me instead of expecting me to interpret what you just said, hope I got the meaning right and try to make a move, when you might have actually just been asking for a jacket.
They're literally just testing if you're a pussy
And if she wants you to make a move and you don't she will forever loathe you with such venom.
I know, and it fricking sucks. I had some success with chicks during and after high school, but I also KNOW that there were times when I was being given signals, but I was loser with a very tenuous social standing and didn't want to risk having absolutely no friends because I made a move and the girl freaked out. Chicks always make guys take the risk and it fricking sucks, ESPECIALLY when you are totally crushing on a chick and you find out from a mutual friend years after that the chick was super into you as well, but instead of doing anything about it she just had her friend drop vague hints.
A big part of growing up is recognizing that female sexuality will never be “fair.”
I'm always nervous about making a move on a chick because 9/10 making a move means just reaching over and doing something physical and hoping she accepts it. It's very fricking animal-like in that nature but I've gotten more genuine fricking green lights from risking sexual assault by going for an unprompted grope than I have by overthinking the moment then spinning in circles before deciding I'll just go home and jack off about it later.
What's your go to grope? I usually play it safe with the hair touch.
I go right for the pussy, three fingers, hook and pull technique.
Go for the front of the hip, push in your thumb with a firm pressure but not too strong. Like you're taking control slightly, but not too much. If a girl wants you she'll respond well, smile or lean into you. If she doesn't want you she'll immediately pull away, if that happens just let her go and act like nothing happened. Touching her hip isn't like grabbing her ass or breasts, she can't really get you in trouble, but it's a strong signal if she responds to it.
They want to feel lead into it. The rapechads are correct.
good morning sirs
It's night right now benchod.
>I've always hated [this fundamental, immutable facet of nature]
>surely reality is the one who should change, not me
Yes
Yeah well, lotsa luck!
Firstly it isn't a fundamental, immutable facet of nature, we've just spent centuries layering on bullshit neuroses and social customs that what should be a simple "I like you, you like me, let's try this out and be happy for a little while, maybe forever" is now a whole fricking dance of hoops, and increasingly more risky for men because a spiteful woman can lie and frick up your whole life.
Secondly I KNOW I'm kind of a loser, I KNOW I'm not the best at reading social cues, I don't even have the 'tism, I just didn't get enough practice when I was younger and that skill perished as I got older (which happens and fricking sucks). You can crack wise on a Korean basket weaving forum all you like, but I'm gonna be 100% real here, I just want to feel like I'm worth enough to be loved again.
didn't read
your unhappiness is of your own making.
no one is obligated to fix your life but you.
keep screaming at clouds if you're to afraid to do anything real, see how far it gets you
Unironically seek help. I'm not trying to be a dick here. You'll be able to sort out your problems.
>seek help
I have, I genuinely have. I'm not completely socially inept that I'm completely alone, I have friends, I'm fun at parties, but I'm getting older, my social circle that used to have 30 people ranging from close friends to good acquaintances slowly dwindled to just a handful, friends either got married or are still focused on their career, the parties I go to now are birthdays, or small gatherings, there aren't random chicks I can just make moves on any more, and online dating is for the birds. Every year that goes by it gets harder. I'm getting older and I'm tired.
I've watched friends almost lose everything because some chick spread lies, and I have another friend who moves from fling to fling because he had a couple exes frick him up so bad that he can't form real emotional connections anymore.
I'd just like for a woman to make a move on me for once.
You're 100% right, King. Frick those other reddit sois
Didn’t read but I’m sure calling all women who’ve kissed more than 2 guys prostitutes will help. Oh and keep using the n word and calling gay ppl gays - that really makes you seem lovable.
>Oh and keep using the n word and calling gay ppl gays
my wife hates Black folk and gays more than i do so this is good advice
Not sure why you’d feel the need to lie on the internet to a bunch of strangers…
women can be as racist and anti-homosexual as anyone else, anon. don't be sexist. my wife says you're a homosexual
As if I’d care what some made up hambeast says. I don’t listen to fat people.
Naw, woman love it when you use slurs bro. Them pussies get soaked every time I call them a homosexual
>naw
>bro
>them pussies
Shut up you eternal virgin
outed yourself as a virgin troon braw
Literally overheard this shaved pink haired lgbt feminist type chick joke with a friend about some dude that was a homosexual and takes it up the ass. Shit made me choke on my drink at the bar lmao.
women can't be gay so they don't understand
Why do you hate flirting? Do you have autism?
How dare you be sincere. You fricking b***h. You fricking butthole. You scumbag. You enemy! Kneel before women! Come on Cinemaphile, let's get em!
They need to bring back arranged marriages in the west.
Correct.
We’re adults
We can use our adult words to talk about penises and veganas and what we want to do with them
The legal system is not natural.
>autist can't understand women
based autismbro
>just lean over and plant one on me instead of expecting me to interpret what you just said
I cringed so hard from. My homie, you are the one who is supposed to do that, not her. Why do you want to be dommed?
I'm not reading this but with the amount of replies, I will assume it's an incel post, have sex incel
It's all about plausible deniability. It annoys me too but you have got to do it as well because you can take it to the next level and fall back if it backfires.
>girl is teasing me about being hard to get
>I just text her it only gets harder for her
Luckily she laughed and called me bad but if she was offended I could have easily said I get more complicated.
lol what a moron
you can't logic into women, that's life 101
>go to movie with girl, age 18
>afterwards she asks "Do you want to go get ice cream?"
>I reply "No, I'm not hungry."
>then she says "Well, will you walk me to my car?"
>I reply "Where did you park? Oh yeah I parked on the other side, that's too far away."
>takes me years to realize that these are full on "Love On The Spectrum" answers
and i'm still a virgin 15 years later
On the insight if also that was her first time dating, she probably thought you were repulsed by her and you fricked her up for life in the dating game
Had a girl grab my arm and place it on her breasts once.
I told her she was cute and she literally melted into me.
AND I WAS STILL TO INSECURE TO GIVE HER THE D, I FRICKING HATE MYSELF
Don’t worry bro, I have a similar story. Now I just have sex with Korean prostitutes to fill that horrible void I created within myself
Does it even work though? or do the hole just come back after you're done nutting?
The hole always comes back. Prostitutes only help if you wanna feel that primal monkey brain feeling.
I see...
Time to reconsider suicide I guess
holy frick...
Just hold hands. It's really not that hard.
Not true. A childhood friend invited me to the movies one time in junior high, saw 21 (2008) and I had gathered enough courage by about halfway to hold her hand.
She moved states the next week without talking to me and I didn't hear or see her again for a couple years.
Hold her hands and don't let go you moron.
I don't want love, I want to be lusted after by women and not gays.
I got one, had a girl over to chill, she "wanted to do something". I suggested a walk, she left, later that night a friend revealed that she wanted to frick me. I sat there embarrassed and fricking humiliated over it. I look back on that and cringe. Same with the "bathroom party" at a moped rally I was invited to by some chick, I had no idea what that meant.
First one was complete obliviousness, I have no idea how that went over my head. Second, I had no idea what a bathroom party was because I was so socially isolated and was so naive socially, I thought she was just being weird and it didn't click me until weeks after.
>bathroom party at a moped rally
What a deeply odd sequence of words
Yeah, I miss it.
When I was 20 (and looked 16) I was at the pub with some friends a late 30 to early 40 milf kept checking me from the bar counter and I did nothing except jacking off furiously that night.
Just reach out to these women you messed up with 20 years later for a second chance. Odds are they're getting desperate as they approach menopause.
She has a kid and is doing well, husbands out of the picture. The moped rally girl, I can't say her name lmao.
what the frick is the point of that when they're not 16 anymore?
Beggars can't be choosers.
Beggars are often choosers. You've never seen a homeless dude turn down food?
Yeah, and everyone hates those kinds of homeless people because that means they are the type to keep dragging themselves down.
No, you fricking moron, it's because food is the easiest thing in the world to come by when you're homeless. Every church just gives that shit out and people alwaya insist on buying food for you instead of giving you money so you don't "spend it on drugs". I don'r need food, I already ate today because taco bell lets me sit in the lobby for a few hours when it's pouring out if I buy a meal. I need money for socks, bus fare so I can get my medical insurance approved, and drugs.
>and drugs
kek
Drugs are a human right.
>mfw I try to tell a cute girl I like her
What’s wrong with his teeth
he lives in the forest. not many dentists
>17 or 18
>finally ask a longtime crush out ice skating
>she gets pulled over on the way there, arrives in tears
>rink is closed
>uh, want to watch a movie?
>go to my place, parents in the next room watching fox news
>I put on Gladiator
>watch in silence
>she leaves halfway through
Still can't believe I didn't think to chase her out to her car and scream, "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?"
One of my biggest regrets in life.
>Still can't believe I didn't think to chase her out to her car and scream, "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?"
One of my biggest regrets in life.
based
I had a double date with my cousin and her gf years ago. They brought a fatty for me and I was in charge of the movie and I picked A Clockwork Orange.
Girls said they wanted to leave after the rape scene. I was driving, I liked the movie, the fatty not so much.
The taxi arrived fast at least.
They're ok with a homeless guy get beaten to death but not a rape? Fricking women. Self-centred c**ts. A Clockwork Orange is class btw.
violence against the weak is a green flag for women
Depraved pieces of shit, aren't they?
When i was in middle school there was this short chubby white girl with MASSIVE breasts that would always tell me about how her sister and bf had sex a bunch and shed always take my stuff and put it between her breasts. She asked me to go to a dance with her but said whe could just go behind the building and "talk" instead. Naturally i freak out and say no in front of the whole class. In hindsight i kind of dogded a bullet because not long after she got sent to juvie for something, idk what, and then i know she had a child at like 15, but man those tities were huge i still regret it
I'd call you a homosexual but I also have a similar story in high school.
Did you really need to ask this? Both
That boy ain't right I tell ya whut
Bwaaaah
There was a girl in HS who I helped with computer class, and I guess thanks to me she got a decent grade. After the winter semester she told me she wanted to repay me with a coffee but I told her "I don't drink coffee" (I actually don't like it). She also accused me of liking her at some point(I didn't, I just decided to help her because why not). She was in fact a medicated schizo so I wrote it off as that, but I'm pretty sure she was trying to ask me out
>want to sleep over?? You can sleep in my bed!
>but where will you sleep?
No woman has ever showed genuine interest in me ever
A couple times when I got into my early 20's but that's about it.
once there was a mentally deranged thai woman who i made my girlfriend for a few months (ending in a horribly weak long distance relationship)
that's it
The only time women that were worth banging that showed genuine interest in me was 17 years ago.
Since then it's been old hags and fatties.
Same. My face looks like a mix of Jonah hill and Michael cera
When I TA'd, there would always be a few of my students that would flirt with me. I shut it down quick because no girls outside them flirted with me so it was obvious they just wanted a better grade.
After we graduated my best friend showed me an AIM chat he saved where the goth girl I had been crushing over since the first day of high school said she thought I was hot, but my neurotic behavior towards cleanliness was a major turnoff. Also she was disappointed I didn't ask her out to prom.
You had a terrible "friend"
If she was turned off by your wants for cleanliness than you dodged a bullet, cleanliness is next to godliness after all
Test
The boy ain’t right is the canonically correct answer
Got up from a party said I had to go to the bathroom
Girl asked me if I needed help
Thought she was being genuine scoffed and said no
>oh
Oh well, she was a 5 anyways so no big woop
A girl taller than me one time literally said she wanted to follow me into the bathroom to see my dick. I just assumed she was telling me but over time, she was kinda loose so maybe she was serious.
>field trip in high school
>girl next to me on the bus touches my thigh, smiles, looks me in the eyes and says "Your lap looks more comfortable than these seats"
>roll a 1 on the perception check
>"Really? I think the bus seats are pretty comfy"
>she sighs, rolls her eyes and quietly stares out the window the whole ride
>roll a 1 on the perception check
Your phrasing it like this is how I know this story is genuine.
I hate you all so much. I never even had chances that I missed.
Realizing years later how badly you fricked up chances that literally fell into your lap isn't very fun either. You look back at them like fork in the road moments where you could have become a normalgay but instead you unknowingly took the incel chud path.
Alright another. In college i was flirting with this think to partly chubby girl after a class we had together. Her boyfriend strolls in so i stop, but 3 more people from our class had rolled up, including an athletic blonde girl. There were no seats so the blonde said “I’m just gonna sit in your lap then.” Instead of doing something about it, i just get grossed out because she has peach fuzz leg hair. I wouldn’t care now. Also didn’t realize she was flirting anyway.
All the girls I’ve had sexual encounters with were all very direct about what they wanted to do with me but they were also dangerously mentally unstable. One girl was really manic, another girl had severe depression and anxiety and some other health concerns and another girl was so depressed she committed suicide
I'm just some sad fat frick now, youth is gone along with everything else. It's just going through the motions until death.
Holy shit these stories are painful to read. It's amazing what no awareness and insecurity can lead to when put in these situations with women.
Yeah, I should have got over my social insecurities and fears and went out more. Oh well.
>agree to study together with gril at uni
>invites me to her dorm room
>we study at the desk, she rests her elbow on my leg
>I don't respond in any way
I was so convinced nobody would like me back then that to this day I'm not sure if she was into me. Did I miss out?
you never asked to study again?
I think I asked her our for coffee at some later time but she stood me up, don't remember if I asked her to study again.
>cute chinese girl from writing class invites me to expensive dinner
>pays for the whole thing
>takes me back to her place to study
>wants to "show me her room"
>literally just shows me her room then closes the door
>we work on a report together
>doesnt talk to me again after
Ngl i tried but im not really sure what happened or what i did wrong. I am pretty awkwars and so was she so maybe she just had second thoughts or something
chinese girls are pretty straightforward when they want to frick
I had several girls follow me home in Taiwan. all DTF
She wanted dick at that moment and you missed your window of opportunity
Dang. Oh well, at least it only took a mere 10 more years for me to bang a girl
Why lul? If you had any friend group in uni then you should have had plenty of opportunities
Do you know where you are?
Oh my bad. Back to the self-masturbatory pitying
Hehe youre so superior, stay epic king 😉
I had over a dozen friends in college I saw near daily and never had any opportunities. It's very easy to not get laid in college.
Never was in a city that had a social scene or anything like that, only for a short time.
I can read social cues but I ignore them because it's more funny that way. We are not the same.
I didn't get laid in college until the very last semester when I took a normie group discussion philosophy course and one of the girls in the class kept on making eyes at me
frick STEM bullshit holy frick it didn't even get me a job, waste of fricking time
He wanted to take it up his bum. He's a very flamboyant homosexual. His signature move that's my purse is very womanly
she would've told her family he made inappropriate moves she didn't like the following morning, he made the right move to not play
>senior trip
>hanging it out in the hotel we stayed at
>female best friend who knew I had a crush on her kept putting her socked foot on my lap and giggling
>I played it off as "eww gross I hate feet haha" when I am in truth a turbo foot fetishist
Was this a signal for something that I completely missed?
What the frick do you think
Weird when things like that don't happen to you the most obvious things slip your mind.
I'm so sorry anon, it may have been.
My girlfriend at the time did something similar and I was like 'wtf' until I admitted I liked it to her and explained why. I asked her to keep going, which made her drop the act and explain how she liked it too (still trying to be as coy as possible).
I guess what I learned was to always be honest and communicate things with women, even when they are trying to test you. I married her, and to this day (although she very, very rarely ever tests me) communicating honestly immediately stops the weird tests. I'll never understand what these tests are, like something hardwired into women's DNA to make sure their mate is up to par or something, like how we enjoy fixing and repairing things, or what. Another mystery I'll never know.
Just like my doujinshis
He should've kicked her in the clunge and shouted that's my purse I don't know you
I have never fricked anyone I didn't meet a dating app. I'm way too cowardly to try to flirt with a girl who hasn't already "okayed" my looks by swiping on me.
And even I take those girls on dates, they tell me I look scared or jumpy. Which I am, because they might be thinking I'm awkward or boring or ugly.
But I wish I knew what it was like, gradually flirting with someone you met as friends or as strangers, upping the sexual tension until someone makes a move.
my girlfriends have all asked me out/initiated
I have only tried to approach women a few times and I was either rejected or never proper broached the question of asking them out
feel I've never quite earned sex as I still have never properly gotten over the fear of speaking to women I don't know or asking ones I do know out
'
>go out for drinks with two female colleagues
>meet two guys and a girl our age who work at a nearby office
>my colleagues leave after a while and i stay to finish my beer
>her colleagues leave as well and she insists on staying until i'm done with my drink
>end up staying for over an hour together
>very drunk at that point and she tells me she'll drive me home
>give her my exact address
>on the way there i fumble for ten minutes trying to put on some music
>end up playing it from my phone like a low iq moron with youtube ads and all
>before we pull into my street i tell her a completely different address ten minutes away
>ask to drop me off there so i can walk home and sober up
>says we should exchange numbers and i just tell her we'll meet again
>walk home in the cold
I literally had pussy on a platter and I somehow completely missed it, did it again the NEXT DAY with my colleague.
>grab a drink and eat after work
>end up groping her a lot and at the same time confess that i want to frick another female colleague
>she gets angry but still asks me to take the metro with her
>tell her to frick off because she lives on the other side of the city
She hasn't spoken to me for almost a week.
Watching KOTH for the very first time, just finished Season 3. What a fricking peak comfy show, holy shit its good
One of the best
>be 13
>already a footgay somehow
>live in secluded cabin with hippie parents who moved away from the city
>go to rural school with no cute girls
>mom invites city friend over to stay at cabin
>she brings her 3 daughters
>two 16~ year olds
>one my age
>they arrive
>my mom tells me to "show them the guest cabin" (usually where I live)
>wtf am I supposed to do, I'm practically nonverbal autistic
>take them to guest cabin
>pretty sure I showed them my n64
>the two older ones sit opposite me, across the table
>younger one sits next to me
>older ones put their feet up on the table with bottoms of feet facing me
>younger one puts her feet up on table too
>leaning forward to show them n64 stuff on table so i'm near all the feet
>brain is literally short circuiting
>pretty sure i just stared directly at the feet like a deer in headlights
>week goes on
>the one my age hangs out with me a lot
>keeps finding excuses to stick her feet in my face or show me her feet
>final day
>sees me sitting at end of couch
>lays down at other end and puts her feet in my lap
>brain malfunctions again
>say and do nothing
>a few minutes pass
>she puts her foot up to my face
>"kiss my foot"
>do some nervous "h-haha" and push it away
>nothing happens
>still remember her face
>she looks like a mix of disappointed and like she's saying "are you moronic?"
>weeks and months pass
>become more aware of my sexuality
>start to fully realize what just happened and what i did
>realize what i just passed up
>tfw spend the next 10 years of footgay inceldom wanting to literally kill myself
>
am i the only footgay incel that never had girls realize what i was and subtly tease me
>too autistic to even tolerate the idea of flirting
>also too autistic to desire companionship
Nice
>too lazy to work without wanting to kill myself
>born in a poor country where working 48 hours or more per week is still pretty much the norm
You can't have everything, I guess.
I had absolutely zero concept of girls liking boys until 7th grade
>got asked to prom every year of high school.
>said no because I don't like parties
This summer I'm going to meet up with my oneitis whose signals I apparently kept missing 15 years ago. If we're both still single should I just be upfront and confess my feelings for her?
What's the worst that could happen?
>whose signals I apparently kept missing
evidence?
Similar footplay teasing story as this anon
+ various stuff mutual friends told me
Also her mom always wanted us to get together. idk if that's a good sign or a bad sign.
autism because that was literally me
i never got the cues and my friends always made fun of me being oblivious
Why is the most realistic and well-written sitcom a cartoon?
I blame tv from early 2000s and 90s. Every single one showed marriage as absolute torture for the man. Every single show had the wife be a completely useless b***h who did nothing but b***h and complain and talk about how she openly hated her husband.
>My Connie is a Laotian
>My Connie lives next door to me
I want a Connie
Asians love Bobby. That Japanese girl was smitten with him
No asians can resist the Hill charms. See Cotton in Japan, and Hank with Min when Khan disappears.
dansu!
Wish I looked like this absolute chad.
Pretty sweet setup he's got for 2002. Would change places with him in a heartbeat.
I’m 32 and have never had sex, kissed anyone, been on a date/dance/prom, or even asked a girl out. I also don’t have a career or any other accomplishments. I should have committed suicide the day I graduated from high school.
This except I don't wanna kill myself because I enjoy being neet. A gf would be nice, but it's not the only thing I want from life.
How does a guy get to this point
For me it is because my mother was a huge fricking b***h who refused to let me have friends because she demanded I give her all my attention. Homeschooled me and we lived in a rural area with no other kids nearby so I was fricked when I moved out at 16.
its dangerous to be outside, what with all the poisonous snakes and dangerous animals, plus being out in the sun for 3 hours without water during peak summer heat is a death sentence for any adult
where I live its mostly pensioners and halfway homes for immigrants so no nearby friends
and immediately stepping outside the quarter mile radius that is my neighborhood puts me in one of my cities 4 major homeless and drug use hot spots
the houses were cheap in 2001 though
Being afraid to try
>T. afraid to try
fear of being vulnerable in another persons presence rooted so deeply it becomes a physical restraint on your actions. mostly this is caused by an upbringing without a sufficiently clear male archetype to grow into. this wasn't an issue a long time ago, masculinity was very clear and not something you'd be ostracized for. kids growing up today are going to be so much worse than millenials at this shit you have no idea.
>but anon how do i fix this
mostly you can't, at some point it's just too ingrained, you can mitigate it by intentionally doing the shit that makes you uncomfortable in the smallest possible way like wearing a hat or sunglasses when you go shopping. if it makes you embarassed and makes you think you look and/or are moronic, you can gradually erode away at the fear of vulnerability until you reach the point where you can talk to other humans.
i'd recommend a book for anyone that actually wants to fix this (you can get it on libgen), even if you have no intention of dating, it helped me tremendously. book is called Models by mark manson.
Sometimes a guy is just tuckered out. What am I... a machine?
He had a small lil pecker penis and small prepubescent balls. That’s why she was laughing during that water park episode when he got stripped naked and thrown down the waterslide by those surfer bullies
One time a girl came over to my house to watch a movie and laid down front-to-front on me and I just laid there until she got up
Then we watched the movie and she went home
/tv9k/ threads are always the best
God I love massaging my twelve year old sister's nipples and ass.
>16
>Saturday afternoon
>girl invites me over asking for help planting a garden in her backyard
>known her since elementary school and we had always gotten along pretty well so I go
>her parents are out of town for the weekend, her older sister is supposed to be around but she went to hangout with her friends all day
>finish with the garden, we're both very dirty and sweaty
>she asks me to start running hot water in the shower for her
>I do, then I go to the kitchen for a snack
>she walks up to me in just a towel and playfully says "I'm getting in now, don't you want to shower too?"
>tell her yeah I probably should
>hear her shout "I'm getting in now!" from the bathroom
>I go to a different bathroom and shower
>afterwards she seemed upset and said I should probably go home
>years later finally realize she wanted me to join her and shower together
Sex ed for boys needs to include instructions about how women give clues and how they ask for sexual stuff in such a way they still have plausible deniability
>then I go to the kitchen for a snack
>Hanging around in someone else's kitchen eating their food without permission
Do americans really do this?
>nooooooo you can’t just have a snack after spending several hours helping me with manual labor for free!!!
Then there's the autistic homosexual that mass replies, have a nice day
When did Cinemaphile get overrun by failed normalgays? I never missed any signs from women wanting to frick me because women have never spoken to me.
both, he was an autistic gay