>Here's that most beautiful woman in the world I was telling you about...
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
>Here's that most beautiful woman in the world I was telling you about...
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
She is pretty hot. Back then there were only like 20 women in Greece so its believable
she was the first greek to have less hair than sasquatch so they fought over her
>Back then there were only like 20 women in Greece
That's not accurate.
No its true
It's hyperbole, obviously, but Archaic Greece had a population of no more than a million. Assuming shitty life expectancies, this would entail maybe 150,000 women of prime age in the country.
Greek pederasts were the first human civilization to reproduce completely free of involvement of women.
This. Look at Cleopatra's head busts from the time. That b***h landed the Roman Republic in its final civil war and she isn't even what we'd call mid
being god queen of eygpt turns a 6/10 into a 9.5/10
2 centuries of incest will do that to ya, but she had big knockers apparently
Did the Greeks continue the Royal inbreeding of the Bronze Aged Egyptians?
Yeah, committed larpers
Not really a stretch. Prime Diane Kruger was an absolute 10. What were you hoping to accomplish with such a gay thread?
Yeah man jowels at a young age. What a bombshell.
Do you even know what jowls are zoomie? Cant even spell the world properly so i have my doubts
Ive always found her to be too generic to be 10/10. Shes pretty sure, but meh.
Also havent seen her feet so i dunno
You’ve never seen Inglorious Basterds?
As opposed to 2020 standards of beauty
Dicks out for Harambe
They’ll cast her in the remake.
you laugh but imagine the army of warrior sons she could give you, homies would be coming out of the womb looking like mulatto Brock Lesnars
would it truly be a victory if those were the winners
It's really amazing how many morons on this board don't understand cursory information about genetics.
Why don't you enlighten us, Dr. Anon?
or you could just breed Lesnar's daughter.
Uhh...no.
Well anon if you want freak viking sons you'll have to bite the bullet.
with the amount of fitoestrogens food has today there is no way any kid is born a gigachad past 2025 unless they are born hunting and harvesting their own food
Do nigs really?
>put the ugliest Black person you can in the movie that will sell tickets
>tickets?
>Only celeb with an anal sextape
>This zoo animal
I'll pass on that one, took me long enough to get over the Gene Simmons sex tape.
you don't need to go to such extremes, Zendaya alone is a statement
What a freaky looking warthog that bonobo is.
Leslie Jones? More like Leslie Black person
Yeah what's wrong with that? People looked pretty bad back then so she was even hotter.
they didn't have breast implants tho
i guess you could say she was a national treasure
She's hot. Man I miss beautiful feminine women on movies
>This german aryan princess is not attractive
nice b8
She really was. I can understand Paris, would've gone to war for her as well.
>Man prefers to go to war for a woman 7/10
and let his whole city burn to the ground, his women are raped, babies are murdered and in general most of his people are brutally massacred including his father and brother.
Black person
Thats what happened in Iliad. yes. Go watch GOT if you want gritty realism with taxes.
The woman was a pretext for a war they would have entered anyway you dumb gorilla. Sending her back would have accomplished zero minus making the Trojans them look like weak capitulators.
>this homie thinks the Trojan War was real
Damn man, I wonder if people two thousand years from now will be arguing about whether the Battle of Hogwarts was mostly Voldemort wanting to kill Hary Potter, or if there were other material causes for it, like attaining some of the treasure in the underground vaults of the castle.
>Mycenae existed
>troy (Wilusa) existed
>near the time of the bronze age collapse
>Achaens trying to invade a foreign power with wealth isn't a stretch to imagine
>troy shows signs of siege
>Oral traditions passed on through centuries are all just made up
Get aload of this homosexual
>the places existed
>and there were some wars
>this means this fantasy poem based on oral tradition is real
I'm sure the tale formed as an amalgamation of various small conflicts with the historical Troy over centuries but you're an idiot if you think it describes an actual war that occurred.
Anon the destruction layer of Troy IV, or whatever it is that is commonly associated with the Torjan war is dated to AFTER the mycenean culture collapsed into submycenean obscurity.
The Mycenaeans captured it with the Trojan horse. The burning and destruction may have been embellishment later on when it was burned down in the early Iron Age.
There was never any horse you plonker
And there was never any Trojan war or Helen of Sparta you slimey brit.
she is a beautiful woman, but sadly has a very flat ass.
Being an assmann myself, this is a terrible tragedy. I wish Kruger all the best
my homie
t.nignog
>obsessed with asses
n*gger hands typed this post
imagine spreading those cheeks just a bit to sniff the aroma of her unwashed groin SSSSSSNNNNNNNNIFFFFFFFFFFFFF
you know that's a body double, right Anon?
And? Its a character being portrayed not the actress. Also if they had a body double why not get one that doesnt have hank hill ass? Shits flatter than most men's
Here anon, I've got what you're looking for.
proof? she showed breasts
Bah, they never show her turn around. I'm calling butt double on that.
>babe I made you a necklace out of fishbones...
that is not jennifer connely…
Plato, pull up what average women looked like back in those days
Meh.
She's no Dove Cameron
Should have just cast Cadey Mercury.
wouldn't she have been like 10?
Shit, you're right. If they make another one though and have Cadey wearing a cheerleader outfit playing Helen I don't think anyone will question whether they'd go to war for her.
That's not 2009-2012 Olivia Wilde.
Hottest woman in the Legoland
>please pray for my cousin, theres nothing wrong with her, she just looks like a lego
She was super hot in that one jack black movie, year zero i think
back then even having straight teeth or not being deformed was a big accomplishment.
Anyway, prime Diane Kruger was really pretty even by modern standards
prime Diane is 90s Diane
cute teeth
I understand that deliciously fat wouldn't pass for most people, but she needs to be softer. She's all rigid and bony.
Damn, she’s 5’7”. Ya, I’d destroy the entire world for that poosy.
I mean yeah?
Anyone who thinks she was less than a 9/10 is a homo
I remember getting twinkpilled as a kid when all the girls were swooning for Bloom instead of Giga-Chad Eric Bana or even Pitt
>pencil arms
>Giga-Chad
>swooning for Bloom
Crazy to think was wants a heartthrob. Goes to show women only care about face.
Ah yes the most beautiful Greek in the Greek nation, Diane Kriegsmarine.
>Ajax?
Yes?
I can't believe people complained about her not being hot enough for Helen back then. What gays.
she's a solid 9/10
correct
>Greek woman
>cast the most Aryan German
Modern Greeks look different as they have had some uh... extra ancestry over the past few millennia.
Ah yes, the inevitable "All ancient people were white blue eyed blondes if I like them" bullshit
Ah yes the seething mutts "there's no blonde people in Greece/Italy" meme
That isn't what he claimed.
Nobody said that you autistic moron. Nordicism is afrocentrism for american Germanic mutts
Illiad literally described Helen as having fair skin, bright blue eyes, and blond hair.
B-but “blonde” doesn’t actually mean “blonde” in Ancient Greek, it means this other thing I made up with mental gymnastics.
This is true, "xanthos" means brown haired in Ancient Greek. They didn't really have a word for blonde so used "polios"(grey) to describe lighter than brown hair
>Illiad
actually, she's not described at all
>actually
kys factgay
i couldn't resist.
Quote it.
Lmao this is blatantly fake. Her sister (Agamemnon's wife) is described as black eyed. Helen is described as fair skinned, but only Athena's eyes are ever described as blue (actually grey) and that's implied to be an exception. Keep coping
I'm still waiting for him to cite "The Illiad" saying this.
>muh evidence
>muh truth
Grow up.
I forget about Helen, but Achilles had hair like fire
Everyone knows fires are red.
YOUR GREAT GREAT GREAT GREAT GRANDMOTHER
FRICKED A Black person, AND HAD A HALF-Black person KID.
Cope.
All archeogenetic science is bunk science and as much real as psychology.
Bronze age Greeks looked more like Nordics than contemporary Greeks.
Uh huh.
Menelaus, the king of the Spartans is described as blond, but the average Greek and Roman would've considered this exotic.
They were darker read a fricking genetics paper pls
WE
>this is what nazoid zoomers actually believe
DAS RITE MAYNE
ΕΜΕΙΣ
When will this nordcel copium meme die?
When reddit starts to agree with it.
How to interpret this data? Is this saying that Apulians are the closest to ancient Greeks?
It's saying that southern Italians are the closest genetically to Mycenean Greeks. Which makes sense to 'Magna Graecia' and Greeks colonizing most of south Italy during the dark ages. Which means that Mycenean Greeks (including elites) were more then likely olive skinned, dark haired, and dark eyed, like modern mediterraneans. Which means that nordicist we WUZZing claiming ancient Greeks were some blonde blue eyed Scandinavian Dolph lundren is just cope, akin to blacks we WUZZing about egyptians.
So shockingly, the people who lived in the Mediterranean in ancient times were...Mediterranean!
!
Shieeeet WE WUZ GREEKZ
>like modern mediterraneans
ahahahahaha
sure, the ottomans just didn't exist at all
modern meds are totally genetically the same as ancient meds
kek
talk about cope
Let me guess, you claim Spanish people are all Arabic.
t. strawmanning moron
Well they sure as frick aren't pureblooded Tartessians, that's for damn sure.
Iberians, whom are mostly EEF, have always had brown/black hair, pale/olive skin, and mostly brown (with many blue and green eyes) eyes. Original Europeans being Nordic is a meme. Yamnayas raped Nords into existence through selecting for blue eyes/blonde hair. EEF/neolithic farmers/Anatolian farmers (which southern Europeans carry genetics for) were tawny, with med features and majority dark hair.
Oh I see, you're saying that corded ware homies rape-changed the genetic makeup of central and northern europeans but such a change couldn't possibly have taken place in the mediterranean basin at any point since the bronze age becasue it just couldn't?
I'm saying ancient Greeks, including Mycenean Greeks (the literal Homeric heroes) are genetically closest to southern Italians. This is not we WUZZing making up shit like nordcels, this is plain fact. Your pilpul is just that. Blah blah Muslims Saracens Turks cope, all the typical excuses bashing southern Europeans are just that, excuses. Genetics and art reveal the truth.
>Albanian
I wish we weren’t related to south Europeans whom were and will always be shitskins
Greeks have always been tawny, dark haired, and brown eyed, with a minority of blondes/blue eyes. In fact, science has indicated that there's genetic continuity between Mycenean Greeks and modern Greeks, with a DILUTION OF NEOLITHIC ANCESTRY (neolithic ancestry is the EEF/Anatolian farmer genetics) which indicates Greeks were BLEACHED by Slavs and that ancients were even more tawny then modern Greeks.
>ignores genetic evidence
>avoids the depictions made by the Myceneans themselves
>Implying muzzies could interbreed with Christians
>implying all Greek men suddenly became sissified and castrated and all Turkish men were assigned a Greek woman harem
>Completely ignoring the fact that Myceneans are genetically closest to Southern Italians
Nordcel coping again
t. continuing to strawman like a israelite
>anything that goes against my nordcel head canon is israeli
Yikes
This is the part of the thread where I'm legally obliged to point out that large, multiple aisled longhouses were the dominant dwelling type in northern europe between the neolithic and early middle ages whereas actual wattle and daub huts were the dwelling of choice of etruscans and latins, to the degree that the Romans conducted rituals in a palatine hut purported to have belonged to Romulus until Constantine the great shut it down into which they also incorporated their imperial palace complexes.
>WE WUZ GAYREEKS AND SHIEEET!
SHIIIEEEETTTTT
>these are the people that laught at stupid blacks that say they're egyptian
horseshoe's law
Sure they did anon
Clearly they are good because they have WHITE FEATURES
We wuz meds n shiet
>All those swarthy meds fighting over a blonde woman
Even though blondes are more rare in Southern Europe they still exist and Helen being blonde would make sense in the exotism factor
They didn't exactly fill the cast with "swarthy meds" anon.
This movie had really good stylists.
Feels like these two were well cast, but others like Pitt, O'Toole, and Kruger all seem off. Brian Cox portrays Agamemnon perfectly, but he might've played an Ionian better. There's a sense throughout Troy that Greece is defined by Sparta at that time (1200 B.C.) which might've been true but it makes for a duller film. Shakespeare's Troilus and Cressida is so much better and funnier.
>shakespeare is better than a hollywood movie
bold
Well Troilus is styled like an ensemble comedy, like it's Hitchwiener's 'The Lady Vanishes' or something
>this is the hottest woman in Sicily
?t=15
natural tradwife, what more can you want
Looks hot to me.
she looks more greek than italian
That's par for the course in Sicily
Careful, women in Sicily are more dangerous than shotguns.
Sicily has Italians, Greeks, Arabs, Lombards, Normans etc.
She’s wonderful and so is the Helen chick.
SHE WAS 16, MICHAEL SICK FRICK
I would have burned her whole village down just for the chance to frick her arschloch.
Young Diane
>you'll never enter a German village on the offensive in 1944 and claim a German peasant bride
I was surprised to learn she was like 30 here. I thought she was only like 21 or 20. I didn't realize she had a whole career in the 90s as a model first before she went into acting.
are we pretending like Diane Kruger wasn't hot now? is this how gay this board has become?
On the contrary, she got criticized by a lot of people back then for supposedly not being beautiful enough for the role.
that's not morfydd clark
so accurate Helen has to be
>med
>blonde
>inducing-men-to-kill-each-other beautiful
cast her
Idris Elba
Prime Amber Heard
>no breasts
>no ass
>no hips
Nice
el dualidad del hombre
morfydd with a tan
Diane Kruger
If they were making that movie today casting the most beautiful woman in the world would be easy.
Grandma of Troy
>picks out a 5/10
yikes sweaty
I would go to war for biel
that ungrateful c**t Justin cheated on her three times, and she is the loyal kind who "works to save her family"
That wigger should be boot stomped to death
i fapped to her butt scene in this movie a hundred times in my teens
yeah she was pretty hot
This was the biggest tease I ever saw in the cinema. 14 year old me was craning my neck as if I could see below the frame.
Holy sex
she shows them in the director's cut
the nips are CG there though, since it wasn't shot to be nude
the nips are the same as in other scenes from other movies on aznude
not really relevant, they're still CG'd over pasties, it's pretty obvious if you look
SWEET LORD
WE NEED OPEN MATTE!!!
Directors cut has those hot breasts in frame
but the nips are CG'd cos she had pasties on, it was a PG13 film til that later cut
>but the nips are CG'd cos she had pasties on
prove it
you can see her boobs fully in that scene
Pull up the theatrical frame where you can see her breasts fully.
>this is the greco-latin bronze tanned swarthy med I was telling you about...
remember when they did a "director's cut" like three years later that added in CG blood and CG nudity, and replaced loads of the soundtrack?
The original ost is better, fight me
(But I still prefer the director's cut)
CG blood is the worst indictment of CGI – a case where practical effects are 100% achievable and look objectively better, but are replaced with digital purely to save time and money. If you like John Wick, you can suck my dick.
They weren't "replaced" here, the film didn't have so much blood/nudity when it was filmed, they wanted a PG13 film. The violence/nudity was added in for the much later director's cut, from 2007.
touch gras incel
This movie unironically had the best casting I’ve ever seen in a historical epic.
>no wogs
>Greeks are swarthy but still White and handsome
>Helen is so fricking hot
>Pitt actually looks like a demigod with that golden mane
>
I'm convinced gay people like you have the worst opinions on everything
Hiw can he be gay if he's racist????
Better than DUNC 2 having florence pugface as princess irulan
Yeah I can see that
I'd go to war just for fun, so she's not a bad reason.
There are other ways to admit you are gay, especially considering it is 2022.
I thought Rose Byrne was prettier
Her permanent sad face makes me diamonds
No, way too specialized
>Greeks and Trojans are played by an American, a Scot, a German, an Australian, two Irishmen and two Englishmen
no one will watch a movie with no-name greeks
>Here's that most beautiful woman in the world I was telling you about...
Braindead if you dont think this is the case
>The German art historian, Winckelmann discusses extensively the Greek beauty ideal. The low forehead, luxurious curly hair, straight nose in continuity to the nose, large eyes and ovoid faces described by the author are typical of Southern Europe, contrasting with the small eyes, high forehead, angular features and straight hair typical of more northern climes.
the only real helen
I don't think the people upset about this casting are actually Mediterranean. It's just a bunch of israelites, blacks, and orientals being anti-White as usual.
>Greek pottery cannot be used directly for determining pigmentation, because most of it is bi-chromatic. It is interesting though, that in the more realistic red-figure vases, the hair is almost always painted black, creating a great contrast with the body which is white (numerous examples in [24]). In white background lekythoi, realistic colors are used. Extreme blondness, typical of Nordic individuals is almost completely absent while many examples have hair that is black or a dark brown. Reddish brown is also present. Martin F. Kilmer, in [7: p.131, n.4] in discussing an Etruscan vase showing a blond woman says that this is “not a common Greek feature.”
>What did Helen of Troy look like? Today's movies and paintings make her a blonde, but ancient Greek paintings show her as a brunette. Homer merely tells us she was “white-armed, long robed, and richly tressed,” leaving the rest up to our imagination.
>this kills the we wuzzer
I've read this several times and I still don't get that last paragraph, or even the point the Eretrian was trying to make in the first place. Also does this support the ancient greeks being nords or being turks argument?
According to graphs above Greeks are Turks and Terrones (basically Turks)
Yeah, maybe I'm moronic, but it sounds like Sophocles and the Eretrian are agreeing with each other, but it's supposed to be a devastating retort?
Are you American? Do you know how to fricking read?
I'm American, and sure, I'll concede for the sake or argument that I'm illiterate. So could you please explain to my dumb ass what that passage means? The Eretrian says that it's wrong to analogize someone's physical attributes to an object because it isn't beautiful, and then Sophocles wrecks him by saying that it's wrong to analogize someone's physical attributes to an object because it isn't beautiful. How are they disagreeing with each other?
Also didn't got this whole thing, anyone can help this brainlet here?
vid related is what Helen looked like
This happens whenever meds witness a nord.
the two girls at 15seconds are unironically prettier
diane kruger was a 10/10 in that movie
This was supposed to be a grounded adaptation, so she's just a generically hot girl, rather than a demigod and the most beautiful woman ever. The Trojan war would be a casting nightmare if you adapted it faithfully. You would have to find actresses for not only Helen, but also Apbrodite, Hera, and Athena, for example. And that's saying nothing of the gigachad male characters.
what do other races think when watching this I wonder
she had pretty decent fake breasts for 1200 BC
Wasn't she raped in the end of the movie or am I thinking of some other movie about ancient Greece?
She's pretty attractive but I was about Briseis when I watched that movie as a young teenager and I am all about Briseis now that I'm 30.
Raped in the more literal sense of antiquity. Paris stealing her from Sparta was rape by the ancient definition.
I mean, at the end of the movie when Troy fall doesn't one of the generals grab her by the waist, throw, smash her back against a table or whatever it was and starts raping her?
I'm probably confusing Troy with some other movie, but I remember seeing this scene. It was probably about ancient Rome.
Menelaus reclaims Helen at the end of the war. I don't remember it being depicted like that in the movie. Most the sexual stuff wasn't explicit to preserve the rating. Obviously scenes like that are pretty common in the genre so it could have been anything.
>Menelaus reclaims Helen at the end of the war
So, Paris got his nation wiped out because of some pussy and didn't even get to keep said pussy at the end?
Well played, Paris.
Paris was dead by that point, but yes that's a major theme of the story.
>So, Paris got his nation wiped out because of some pussy and didn't even get to keep said pussy at the end?
Blame the gods. There games fricked him over. War started because zeus was a simp and couldn't pick between some hoes.
Almost like you shouldn't sell our your nation for some poontang or something.
That's in the movie "helen of troy", I think it's called. Has rufus as Agamemnon.
>Behold !
>The heaviest juggs in all of Greece
Helen? More like Swellin’.
nah
Is there a cut of the film with more of Agamemnon? It seems like Brian Cox is turning in this great semi-satiric performance which is really one of the classic performances of the 2000's.
Here's that homosexual OP I was telling you about
>Movie set in 2022 America
>Here's the most beautiful women in the country I was telling you about bro...
Not bad at all. I don't care about her race as long as she is hot, Nathalie Emmanuel would be a great choice.
for the love of god, source
2022 remake
Such an odd actress, in every red carpet picture she dresses and styles her hair completely white but in 90% of her movie and TV work she's made up as ethnically as possible, bordering on blackface.
Because she's barely black but she's the current big time "black actress" so they play her up.
Cute!
She booty shakes on MTv and then goes home to cook dinner for a White man. Sad, many such cases.
Hhhhhhhhh
Very nice, my peepee says she is a pass.
yes
fake breasts
They're grandfather claused. Dumb idiot
wrong
wrong
fake breasts werent invented yet in ancient greece
I saw this movie as a kid and I don't remember this part.
Are you gay? Diane Kruger in the early 2000s was really fricking hot. Also you know she had a big fat bush in Ancient Greece
She will do for the time being.
She didn't do shit for me in Troy. Her in Inglorious Basterds though....HOT DIGGITY DOGS
What charcter was she, I forgot. The coalburner?
No, the actress.
No, the hot kraut feme fatale
Why are these threads allowed?
here's your Achilles bro.
Like I get not casting a blonde blue eyed American. But why is he BLACK black? He's Greek. Wouldn't you cast a Greek person if you were going for "accuracy"? Or Greek adjacent? Like if you cast an Italian I'm sure someone would balk but given the close Rome/Greek historical legacy it'd be appropriate enough.
greeks are black you chud
Achilles is explicitly described as blond in the original.
He's a fricking ginger you dumbass.
For some reason "non-Anglo white" just means "African black" in a lot of these period shows or films. It's weird.
it was a BBC production
at least this dumb "ancient greeks looks like nords" thng isnt as bad as the "jesus was white" myth
>Achilles is black
>Helen is played by german actress
Nice
Those two don't have a romance, what's your point?
That they force blacks upon the audience but even they still think the most beautiful women in the whole world comes from Germany.
Kpop idols look better than her
Wrong pic OP
lmao imagine being the troony chaser who has been obsessing about this dude for 2 years now
just fricking look at this guy lmfaooooooo
do israelite nose there's something wrong here?
compared to todays "beauties" yeah , shes 10 / 10
>Movie casts blacks/Latinos
Nooooo, you are ruining the original, I hate this woke culture and pandering! Fricking israelites!
>Movie casts Anglo snowBlack folk as Greeks
...
theres half a thread arguing about it you blind frick
>read the thread before posting scrub!
it's not 2005, grow up already
didnt they used to marry girls off when they were very young
helen of troy couldve been 12
Literally generic German woman, nothing special whatsoever
kek
israelites can only argue against arguments they make up themselves
the ancient meds were not what meds are today, nor were they 'nordcels' or any other israeli nonsense these israelites want to strawman
read March of the Titans
Why are you posting like that?
>israelite using the term pilpul whilst he pilpuls
you are parodies of yourselves
That's what israelites are though. Parodies of humanity.
Nordcels gonna nordcel.
not an argument
>we're totally not israelites, guys
>posts israelite shit
we see the nose, chaim