How would you personally go about making a new Harry Potter film if you had the budget and resources of a major studio?
How would you personally go about making a new Harry Potter film if you had the budget and resources of a major studio?
How would you personally go about making a new Harry Potter film if you had the budget and resources of a major studio?
I'll tell you once Bing starts working again
What is this phenotype of women called?
I want to own one and keep them safe
>What is this phenotype of women called?
Perfection.
p...prompt?
"A teenage girl with short messy dark brown hair and a single orange streak in the center of her fringe. She has lavender eyes and thick furrowed eyebrows. She is wearing green Slytherin robes with black stockings and combat boots. She is looking very disheveled and tired, she has very dark bags under her eyes. She has a smug look on her face. 4k photograph, real life, 1980s, masterpiece, looking at viewer"
Wouldn't it just be called "pixie" or something along those lines? That's what they resemble closest to me.
It's literally just French-Canadian mutted up with some more native and a pinch of german. There are thousands of chicks that look exactly like this in trailer parks all across the US.
I would say it's a Scots-Irish/Germanic mix phenotype, very common in the US and Britain.
Hogwarts in the 80s could be sick
All witch school. The plot is mostly irrelevant but it will involve poly juice potion and at least a dozen love triangles involving twins in more cases than not. They will of course have to team up as a school to defeat an evil werewolf who has a massive boner. The boner is the source of his power. How the witches will defeat the wolf well....you'll have to watch to find out.
White trash from the upper south/mid-west. Better act quick though, they transform into forty year old great grandmothers as soon as you can say "Sally May".
that phenotype is called illustration, it doesnt exist, you fricking moron.
>What is this phenotype of women called?
AI slop
>What is this phenotype of women called?
AI imitating bad artist
Crack prostitute that'd have you stabbed for a hit
It's the autistic very mentally troubled but just wants to love someone wife. I'd like one too. Maybe in a decade when we reach breakthroughs in robotics. Like Westworld.
I knew a girl that looked just like this but I fricked up my chance. She told me she wanted to give me a nice sloppy bj but of course I chased some other b***h who ruined me
She exists and shes MINE
FRICK YOU
punchable
You won't yo own one? Buy a pet moron
Mesugaki
>of women
That's an 8 year old boy
Showing that Moldywart was right. Frick the Masquerade
Is this just one Brazilian posting all this Black person AI or did some YouTuber do a video Black folkay about dall-e?
>still giving a shit about harry potter in 2012+11
these books were for children, move on already you sad manchild
Now that is some uncanny valley shit right there.
I would focus on romance between Snape (my self insert) and Hermione (my waifu)
Fricking kek. Tell us you're a greasy-haired paedophile without telling us you're a greasy-haired paedophile.
Why do you go out of your way to spell pedophile the way only a pedophile would spell it when calling someone else a pedophile? Is there an end-game here or you just having a laugh?
I'm Bri'ish, mate. We write paedophile, mediaeval, encyclopaedia, and so forth.
>I'm British
Oh yeah, so you write pedophile the way pedophiles would write pedophile because you are a pedophile. Naturally this is how you were able to call out another pedophile in the wild, seeing as you are yourself a pedophile. Takes a pedophile to know a pedophile....and all that. Carry on then.
If I used 'gay' as often as you use 'pedophile' you'd accuse me of being a closeted homosexual. Get help before you seriously frick up someone's life.
Nah mate, you spelled gay like a non-gay would spell it mate. All good on that one, cour blimey. But listen here ya todger. It's pedophile mate, not like howse youse beese sayins it....m8.
kys newbie
newbie?? I'll have you know I've been here since 2016!
>smug e-girl Hermione
HNNNNNGGGGG
Hermione is a mudblood and therefore ugly and dumb.
>Tell us you're X without telling us you're Y
It's 'tell us you're X without telling us you're X', ackshually. What you wrote made no sense.
>paedophile
Is this website called Cinemaphile.co.uk? Frick off
>English? We speak American round these here parts!
Don't choke on your Big Mac, big guy.
pedophilius repellus
How would those two even begin to find each other attractive? I can't think of a more awkward pairing.
Clearly you don't have the mind of a greasy-haired paedophile.
teenage girls find older guys attractive, that's why they have posters of 20 years older celebs on their walls. do you think a 13yo thinks about her classmates when she jerk offs? that a grown man can find jailbait attractive doesn't have to be explained. as for their specific personalities she's a teacher's pet and he's a stern teacher, it's obviously a dominance-submission thing. i don't even jerk off to harry potter nonsense but it's a pretty obvious pairing if you're not an autist, happed a million times to actual schoolgirls.
she's a kind smart girl
he's a dark and tortured soul
they're both smart and have deeply emotional natures, his grim cruel nature is unlike any other boy she know, both got bullied, she sees her own worst aspects in him and wants to fix him and make him enjoy life more, he sees what's best of him in her and enjoys affection he's so starved for, the taboo of student/teacher and the age difference romance turns them both on because it's so wrong but feels so good
frick, I'm fully convinced. Once AI is capable enough I'll have it direct this Episode with Adam Driver as Snape, Lily James as Hermione and me as Ron, the self insert cuck
she grew up watching him tower over her and gradually without noticing got closer to his stern eyes to see glimmers of light every time they locked eyes, he was the only consistant male figure of authority in her entire life and spend her whole life trying to live up to his impossible standards she takes great pleasure from following orders and doing what she's been told while he likes commanding others, he likes to extend his control over people while she needs order and detailed plans that he requires her to follow, not even like a person but a little doll he plays with or a pet to train, both are very possessive in how they care for people they like, his demanding nature creates structure she can follow, clear goals of what to do to please him that still allows her bratty nature to play around with just for him to punish her, thus letting her know he still both cares for her and for him to relieve any anxieties he's too scared to showcase, a volcano of emotions that will never erupt due to his self control that she tries to awaken but he's too strong driving her more and more crazy wanting to him to open about his life, they both drive each other crazy and love each other more and more, constant game of cat and mouse with roles constantly changing because they both make each other fall for one another harder and harder, an unhealthy codependent relationship they cannot get out of
i would rewrite some shit, like having harry and hermione ending up together. i'm sure there are other minor/major changes that i would make, but that would be the biggest.
I would embezzle all the money and disappear.
I pull the genius move of making a Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them where the wizard actually just travels the world to find magical beasts and save some muggle villages from a Catoblepas and shit like that, instead of playing reluctant spy/cop. The only other wizards he faces are buttholes who are breeding dangerous new magical beasts like a puppy mill or enslaving them to scare muggles into worshipping them, forcing him to work out a way to stop them.
I wouldn't
Listen stop making remakes
You think you'll make more money but you won't
You know what's he hot right now?
The turner diaries.
Make the rednecks die in the end though that'd be funny
this AI needs sleep, some cold/flu medication, and of course the latest COVID booster
I'd hire the director of Serbian Film.
she cute
>set in the future at an older castle being used by Hogwarts due to running out of space at Hogwarts itself (it even looks like Hogwarts just on a smaller scale)
>main character is a wizard with a loving family of wizards, and looks up to Harry Potter as a role model
>he is smaller, and is a Slytherin, and gets picekd on by other kids
>learns to make friends, defend himself, and explore the secrets at this new castle
>makes friends with a chad Quiditch player who helps teach him how to stick up for himself and see the value in him self, almost like an older brother
>also makes friends with a stacy witch who helps him to socialize and makes friends with others at the school
>there are other kid bullies that act as antagonists
>the main threat is a Dementor who's became very powerful and taken refuge in the castle somewhere, preying on the weak new kids
Just make it similar in setting and charm of the original two movies, and there you go. Maybe have them visit Hogwarts at one point for a Quiditch match, but the focus should be on the new location.
Shamelessly rip off the James Potter sequel series without giving him a red cent.
I keep coming to this sewer for posts like these. Thanks anon.
Small group of wizard criminals need to do a wizard bank heist to pay back a wizard kingpin the wizard money they owe him after a failed job. Set it in america or somewhere else but not the uk because we’re used to that wizard world to give it some extra creative freedom. Something ala oceans 8 or whatever but wizardy
Assuming I had complete creative control,
>years after the events of the books
>new characters
>make the fights more interesting than just throwing lights back and forth
>plot revolves around wizard duelling as a sport, lots of interactions with other schools around the world
>focus on soft retconning all the numerous plotholes throughout the series
Actually the first good idea in this thread that isn't entirely self-serving.
grizzled cowboy wizard get called in to kill some giant mountain monster in the sierras that's preventing the transcontinental railroad from being finished
Do zoomers even like HP anymore? Don't they all hate J.K. Rowling for hating trannies?
CUTE
If any HBO producers are reading this thread, I really hope they use this character in the upcoming reboot. Just make a knock-off zoomer Merula and you will have Wednesday levels of success.
shes so precious
What's the name of the modded version of the game with none of the mobilegame time sinks?
just google game name modded apk
I don't mean the ones where you get infinite energy. Didn't someone make a version that got rid of all the fluff like collecting stars for classes before you can proceed with the story.
not sure if i've heard about that, you can check the hp games general on /vg/ though.
I want to see a Harry Potter film set in a Medieval Period, 900 AD, or 1000 AD, or 1100 AD, even 1200 AD. Early or Late Medieval. I want to see actual wizarding wars. I want to see wizards combating the Catholic Church as they seek out witches to prosecute. I want to see English wizards having beef with French wizards. I want to see Hogwarts immediately after it was founded (10th century). I also want the entire cast to be white European English/Irish/Welsh/Scottish.
>I also want the entire cast to be white European English/Irish/Welsh/Scottish
OK, *this* is epic.
rape
Yes she will be by pakis and nigerians
If they made a Marauders movie it would make bank.
inb4 Sirius and Peter were secret gay lovers the whole time
cute boy
God I love scruffy teenagers with plush DSLs (obviously I mean 18+, jannies)
Just but a PAWBG in every scene looking sexy in a dress.The source material is already trash but asses are nice.
>how?
I wouldn't, because that isn't the actual important question..."why" is.
There will be little interest to the franchise, so any reboot or rebrand will struggle until older original actors are thrown wheelbarrows of cash to save something nobody in the audience wanted.
Nostalgia is a fringe niche as a market, and won't save a dead franchise, unless major modifications are made to attempt to sell to a new audience, who is not interested in it anyway.
Since the point of "making movies" has nothing to do with movies or entertainment, but cash flow & tax havens, the only reason to attempt another Harvey Pooter is for tax breaks and government grants.
As a "franchise", it was a short-lived Ponzi that is long on the downhill side of being mined out as a kids consumer product.
The market has moved on from this particular pet rock one-off, and 8 year olds 20 years later aren't that large a market domestically.
It still might have some financial gain legs, but they are spaghetti.
How about the next Harry Potter shows us more of Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin (and how about some "good" or at least "not evil" Slytherins?). They're supposed to be doing a tv series for HBO or whatever, and there should be lots of episodes to devote some time to showing us more of the other houses, like seeing their Common Rooms would be pretty cool at least.
there are no good Slytherins, you fricking moron. it's the Nazichudcel house for a reason.
Snape and Slughorn are "good" Slytherins.
Merlin was a Slytherin. Real chads are in Ravenclaw though like me.
>Tfw I retook my patronus quiz several times to get the Capuchin Monkey
>his patronus can't fly
Shit tier. Wouldn't even bother summoning.
Real Chads go to Gryffindor
i was skimming the books the other day and it hit me that i'd like a series about Snape's and Marauders' time at school. not sure if i'd want just Snape's POV or all of them + Lily. i know it's kind of corny and Tumblry to want this, but i feel like it's the most natural idea for new books. have it be more mature/YAish than children's books and have it start in the ~5th year or even later
That'd be cool. I hope nothing bad happens to any of them. Prequels are fricking gay
I would sooner defenestrate myself than waste the power of a single brain cell trying to inject some semblance of excitement into the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.
>a-at least the books were good though
"No!" The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."
I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.
i wouldnt
I would point my wand at my soapy gf and say “flatulensis brappicus” with a nice flick of the tip and she would be filled to the brim with farts for me to enjoy all evening
i love merula. why are syltherin women so lewd?
because underneath all the armor they've built to protect themselves lies a sensitive heart that longs to be adored.
Founding of Hogwarts could work. 4 friends later turn on one another. Could even be made in a single film but probably a trilogy
Make it about Cassandra.
I'm thinking based
She's better than Merula but both are slytherinkino ultimately
This character was designed in a lab by a team of experts specifically to appeal to me.
They even made her part Veela.