was walking with my oneitis in the mall a week ago when we stopped under a mistletoe. I then remembered the line from Batman returns so I quoted it to her
>You know mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it but a kiss is even deadlier if you mean it
She looked genuinely disgusted when I said this and I tried coping and saying it was from Batman but her whole demeanor changed after this and we haven't spoke since.
What gives? I'm 6'1, lift, black hair and a quiet guy so I should be giving off Batman vibes so why did I fail in this situation?
you just learned an important lesson: never use movie lines irl, especially on women, they make you look like a cringe moron
Who the frick told you that you have Batman vibes?
I'm quiet, paranoid and brood a lot. I also lift.
You looked at Batman and said he's just like me?
kek, this "literally me" is literally me.
I called my oneitis a bawd. She was talking about how she loves popcorn and I'm like "oh you're a bawd for popcorn" and she stopped responding .
fricking autists lmao
>Suck me beautiful
Dear god
Dodged a bullet. Imagine what a c**t she’d be down the road when you ask for head.
birthrates lowering, frogposting rising.
If she actually liked you she wouldn’t have cared that you said a slightly cringey pickup line
I told mine to frick off because its what a badass like Heisenberg would do
One time in HS BCIS class I looked at a hot chick sitting next to me and said a line from Zach Galifianikis's first special
>Me: "Touch my pussy."
>She looks at me weird.
>Look into her eyes.
>Me: "That's what you're supposed to say."
It didn't go over too well.
Damn. This reminds of of being in 8th grade with gf/ex/ whatever she was and there was a part of the lab where you go off into a side room and youre alone...we couldn't stop making out. Like couldn't keep our hands off each other. I kinda miss being THAT horny.
One of the ugly girls in my class in grade 8 offered me a blowjob in a supply closet and I turned her down.
Really disappointed with myself in retrospect.
Cute girl was flirting with me said she wanted to play seven minutes in heaven with me, but I didn't understand the reference, and I asked if she was a prostitute, which made her upset
Yup, you're the Christmas cheeseball.
how can we believe that is true?
I slapped my ex in the face before and she cried, it had good contact to be fair
Most women need beat from time to time, anon.
Well, did she learn her lesson or not?
You could've paused after
>You know mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it
and waited for her to finish it. If she didn't, you know she doesn't get the reference so you could've saved yourself and dropped it. Play it off like it's a fun fact you read online or something.
I'm sorry, king.
Why didn't you just kiss her?
Bros I'm tired of being a virgin...
Under 20, become the GF.
Over 20, it's over.
Sex with dudes isn't all that bad, honestly
don't listen to the gays. sodomy isn't sex so when you frick dudes you're still a virgin.
Same, I know I can frick some gross bawd but I don’t want to.
I haven't spoken to another living person that wasn't family for over a decade.
How do you pronounce oneitis.
Does it rhyme with that fictional futurama disease bone-itis? Or is ir "wun"-itis?
One of those stupid neow words I thought would go away but didn't so I never bothered learning it but I kow once I learn it it will go away forever so I'll learn it now.
it's wun-itis, when a man is obsess with one woman and doesn't even consider engaging romantically with other women
You guys are fricking unsalvageable. I still cringe thinking back to when my GF scolded me for saying 'homosexual.'
Me “taking my way out of some pussy” with my exes are some of my proudest moments. The fact that I still got some angry pussy anyways most of the time means I won (or so I tell myself while jerking off with my own tears).
You should have gone with
>If I pull that off will you die?
>She looked genuinely disgusted when I said this and I tried coping and saying it was from Batman but her whole demeanor changed after this and we haven't spoke since.
This homie didnt scare shit. Just gave a foid the ick.
It's insane how differently women react to inititing sexy talk. I'm a 26 yeat old virgin male but I had a 16 year old from the Philippines on Discord sensing my voice chats calling me daddy saying she wants to suck my dick without even trying. People are always quick to say "the problem is just you!!!" Whenever you say you suck with women but don't underestimate just how much location matters anon.
>but I had a 16 year old from the Philippines on Discord sensing my voice chats calling me daddy saying she wants to suck my dick without even trying.
asian women are easy mode, it doesn't count
Beggers can't be choosers. Just grateful to have a taste of what I didn't get to as a teen. Besides I'm not wrong, blaming yourself for falling can be an excuse if you're not willing to look into external factors as well. I'm gonna go over their had lose my v card with her, so at least I'm making progress.
if a girl likes you, they are insanely devoted to you. if they dont like you, they arent. theres no set of magic words/actions to force a girl to like you. the trick is to be desirable as soon as a girl first sees you. thats why people say the problem is you, you need to improve yourself to be desirable from first contact
3rd worlders love americans so you didnt really have to do much
Blocked
What a stuckup b***h. You should rape her and teach her some manners
Is it cope to think being an incel is a blessing? I believe that if you lose your virginity you lose that special power to obtain greatness. Those who have sex regularly get rail roaded into a normalgay lifepath while incels are a revolutionary subject.
Napoleon wouldn't be who he was if he was born as a 6'2 nordic male model. Neither would Kissinger. Only an incel can become the real Batman. At most handsome normies can become a successful corporate worker or YouTuber but nothing more. Dancing monkeys or competent cogs but they can never achieve true power
You are deranged
Are you sure she is your oneitis and not just a crush?
>Have an hispanic immigrant gf.
>Call her a brown 3rd worlder and an ESL turd.
>She gets upset that I don't think she's white...