I still don't get how no one figured out she wasn't a woman
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I still don't get how no one figured out she wasn't a woman
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Is getting off really that important to men?
to some
Yes
Getting your dick sucked to completion by a cute gal is pretty much in the top tier of things to do at any given moment.
I hate being circumcised like you wouldn’t believe. My sensitivity is so low cumming from a blowjob is impossible. Feels like she’s sucking on my thumb.
My circumcizbros. Only the wet pussy (without condom) is what works. The rest is just nothing.
I can confirm wet pussy is the best.
Though this chubby girl gave me a great lubed handjob once. She employed a secret technique I cannot divulge.
>She employed a secret technique I cannot divulge
finger in the ass, duh. it's not a secret
i know
All I can do is hope forever actually pulls through. In the meantime I’ll continue restoring and restore some sensitivity. Just having a little extra skin makes a huge difference, I used to be really tight and sex without lube would result in skin burns for both me and her. Hasn’t happened since I made some progress.
Im uncut and cant cum from a bj either
I probably could if I stopped death grip fapping daily, but honestly its not worth it
Porn has rotted your brains...I'm cut and bjs are amazing
There's different levels of circumcision
The kind that severs/takes the frenum is INSANE. On my cut wiener the frenum is like the clit, man.
intact but same.
I don't know how to coach better blowjobs either cause I don't suck dick
were you circumcised recently? How the frick would you know if your sensitivity would be different? Don't believe Israel is a legitimate state and denounce the Talmud, etc, but I'm cut and honestly glad, its a flap of skin that traps smegma, its not like they cut half your dick off.
I'm cut and I coom hardest from blowjobs, it gives me body-trembling shivers.
I can have someone slob on my knob for hours and I probably wouldn't cum. But if I put benis in bagine, I cum within a minute or two. Explain this.
it is also important to women
When I'm stressed from work/life, the absolute last thing I want is to have to worry about performing sexually.
That’s why a good woman is all about YOU. Such a wench is irresistible.
Yeah same, always afraid my dick gets soft because I am exhausted or stressed
Sexual release for men is on par with food / water / shelter. Leftoids consistently downplay the effect celibacy has on men's mental health while ignoring the biological differences between the sexes. Genuinely and unironically most men will see more of an increase in emotional well-being with a single enthusiastic blowjob compared to thousands of dollars in medication and therapy.
>muh sex
you are as vain and braindead as women. Leftoids are the least of your problems, but then again, you really don't have issues in life
The goal of every living being is to reproduce, so you need to have sex
No sex=no reproduction=failed as a living being
>The goal of every living being is to reproduce, so you need to have sex
So a blowjob is as good as masturbation, unless you can tell me how you can reproduce with a BJ
>Sexual release for men is on par with food / water / shelter
Lol that's such a big fricking, insulting lie. Sorry you were brainwashed.
You’re just in denial because you’re sexually frustrated.
>n-no! That’s a big INSULTING LIE!!
>fulfilling your literal biological imperative as a healthy adult male is like no big thing… because I can’t get pussy this is the way it must therefore be
I wouldn’t put it as high as food/water/shelter but it does have a massive impact on your mental well being, particularly when you are a young man. Do you really think that “sex = important” is some modern degenerate lie? If anything we’re living in one of the most sexless and repressed periods in history.
>sex = important is some modern degenerate lie
Most men in history never even had a wife, nevermind much sex.
Sexual release sure, but not sex.
They were interested in starting dynasties not fricking women.
When Odysseus offers an aging shepherd a wife it wasn't so he can frick it was to start a family.
Sex has morphed into something different, my point was that sex was something seen as entirely natural that they didn’t even think of as degenerate. Odysseus was from a culture that thought nothing of fricking children. Enkidu fricks a b***h because he felt like it.
>odysseus was from a culture that thought nothing of fricking children
If you want to spout LGBT nonsense myths then go back to plebbit.
Pederasty was common in Greece and many societies. Homosexuality was viewed as a totally different thing. This was largely due to the fact that women (who weren’t prostitutes) were kept at home or under guard until their parents could marry them off to a man with means. Once a boy could grow a beard he would be let go and allows to find a boy to continue the cycle with.
>pederasty was common in greece
It literally wasn't.
Greeks hated nonces but like in the modern day the elites would sometimes do it and everyone else just had to grit their teeth.
Actually read the translations in full.
Monks seem pretty happy to me honestly. I don’t think everyone is the same
>Monks seem pretty happy to me
how many do you know
I actually did meet several at blackfriars in oxford while doing my masters. They were amiable and fairly chill. I’m sure some of them are frustrated and unhappy, but the three I met just seemed incredibly normal
They have God which, while I don't understand, makes you act in irrational ways. Believing in fairytales and such.
I used to think sex was all important, then I realized my life was empty. After all, that's why we're all here. Bored and lonely, you can only fill so much time with hobbies and work. If you have no purpose you're like a man on a river with no oar.
>irrational ways
They’re responsible for a massive chunk of philosophy and science. Mendel literally revolutionised biology and his activities in the monastery were a big reason why, he could frick around with plants and insects all day
I want to know why they believe in God. I know there are a shitload of rational Christians. Not a one of them has provided a good explanation for their subscription to Christianity.
because materialism literally makes no sense. you don’t need to be a christian to know that, plato explained it well enough. you say rational but really you mean empirical, you want sensory observable evidence, because rational a priori logic is massively in favour of the principle of sufficient reason, ie, that nothingness cannot be the foundation of all reality
Who says nothingness is the foundation? Even empiricists like myself acknowledge a creation event, the big bang. What came before that is beyond the realm of empiricism. That doesn't mean I'm going to run off and start racking up piety with this or that dirty figure.
Christianity was just a cult, before it was elevated by a Roman Emperor, arguably the most powerful person in the world at that time. It's not special. It's cleverly structured, but obviously a mortal institution. Not divine.
For me what came before is a great mystery. I would not hasten to guess what it was, but the Christian God seems most unlikely. Too convenient.
deity* figure
"Figure" was redundant, but frick I hate autocorrect sometimes.
Talking about “before” the big bang isn’t really relevant, since it was the beginning of time. That’s not what a contingency argument is about. It’s that material things are dependent on not only prior states of things but conditions which generate them in the first place, they don’t justify themselves. People aren’t talking about another mechanism behind the mechanism, but the somethingness instead of nothingness sustaining things in the first place, which cannot coherently be material since material things are contingent. And you can criticise how christianity spread, but at the end of the day that’s like me criticising how calculus spread, of course any idea that gains traction with the elite becomes commonplace, because beliefs and ideas are always things useful for us in some way. And it’s not as though christian thought exists in a vacuum, it continued and built upon pagan metaphysical thinking and honestly, at least so far, it terminated with christians. The model of people like leibniz and aquinas is morally and metaphysically and consistent and all encompassing, there are no gaps in it. Their ideas stand today as they did back when they were written, and are the most coherent model of reality I have read about. They argued, before they could have known, for a materially separate and contingent law governed physical universe parasitic upon ideal, a priori divine rules. Unlike plato and aristotle, they didn’t assume an eternal universe, but described pretty much the philosophical model of it you can effortlessly employ today. I’ve yet to see a philosophical accomplishment as impressive, and I think that’s a fine reason to assume they were correct
I must be a brainlet because I honestly don't think a philosophical argument is that impressive. Ok, so Aquinas intuited a creation event before he could know empirically about the creation event. I assume I'm following you here, hopefully I am. That DOES NOT prove Christian dogma is correct or even relevant. It just means the smartest guy was a Christian!
I'm immensely skeptical of something as inherently suspicious as the Catholic Church. Clearly the most successful social engineering experiment ever. I see an oligarchy, with entirely human concerns. Political concerns, economic concerns. I do not see a house of the divine. I do not see revealed truth. I see a lot of excellent art, which would move the soul, if we had souls. It caresses my cerebellum, like the blue of the sky and wind in the hair. Everything natural, from nature. The supernatural does not exist.
the guy in your pic is really underestimating the power of cunning individuals with power and spiritual superstition, what a fricking moron
This dude looks like Cole from Fishtank Season 2.
CROWLEY LOOKS LIKE THAT????????????'
Cool quote from Hilliard Ballsack LMAO
Pwned.
Oxford University is almost 1000 years old...
for a lot of that it was just monastic houses run by the church
It depends on how you want to tackle it. Philosophically the prime mover is sufficient. I’ve always wondered how materialists reconcile abiogenesis (its lack ) and materialism. We’re at the point where we through the empirical method we can and have constructed entire replicant genomes. Completely identical to living beings, but have been unable to create life. At the very least it proves definitively that life is contingent on something that is not contained in the genome. This should be a massive shake up for materialist thinking, but it isn’t even well known outside specialist fields which struggle with it to this day.
Personally the massive gaping holes in materialist ideology in relation to to empirical evidence combined with cogent philosophical arguments is more than enough for me.
>Philosophically the prime mover is sufficient
it's not because what moved the prime mover? the answer is always "the prime mover is excluded because i said so"
>I’ve always wondered how materialists reconcile abiogenesis (its lack ) and materialism.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miller%E2%80%93Urey_experiment
it's not hard to imagine that amino acid chains able to reproduce themselves arose. we might not know every detail but it's not as mysterious as you think
>the prime mover is excluded
Do you understand what that term means? You’re straight up not understanding the term. If the prime mover was moved it wouldn’t be the prime mover. By definition the prime mover has to be self sufficient or it isn’t the prime mover.
Also regarding your 70 year old experiment. We’re way further into the study of abiogenesis and we’ve made far more progress. Which is my exact point of general ignorance of where we are scientifically among the masses.
We’re already able to plug in and replace genes that we created. We’re unable to actually create life because there is an essential element that is completely outside the genome. I hate to say it but you’re literally the type of person I was referring to. Completely uneducated and unaware of where the science is today and the problems we face in relation to abiogenesis, posting 70 year old studies when we have had decades of advancement and subsequent problems since.
Yeah the Prime Mover is literally the best philosophy can do. You do have these theoretical physicists saying something can come from nothing. They're little more than highly compensated mystics imo.
So maybe there was a creator. I truly don't think this creator would give a shit about us. Or, to tack on another direction: if the creator does have an interest in us, then what's with all the empty space? Why make this huge universe when we can worship from this rock?
I think when we find indisputable proof of intelligent life, organized religion will have a moment of reckoning.
>"Hello hew-man. Geezus? Never heard of him!"
physicists DONT say something comes from nothing. if they do they’re being dishonest. the most they will say is that a quantum field can randomly generate particles - but a quantum field isn’t nothing.
>why would the creator give a shit
it would de facto be deeply involved in every process occurring in the universe since they are all subsistent on its will. this is what is meant by contingent, ie, that material things, not justifying their own existence, are parasitic on their beingness from the immaterial foundation or god, as aquinas calls god, being itself subsisting (ipsum esse subsistiens). every atom and relation and process is being actively sustained on it, so it is by definition involved in them.
Yeah that's just too convenient. Trust us, he's there and he's listening. I don't buy it. I've never felt the divine presence. But I know what a long con looks like.
Sorry, the Catholics have done some real good and some real bad. The mass psychosis of skydaddy worship is the latter. Forbidding condoms; definitely not what the 3rd world needs right now.
The Catholics are obsolete. We have secular institutions that can do the good things they did; yes, those institutions are being captured by radicals and trannies. Something must be done. A dose of reality, and no tall tales, is in order. It's belief in the fantastical that got us into this troony mess.
Honestly, an uncaring universe just makes a lot more sense. Shit exists. There are forces. I don't know where they come from. It's probably not important either. Might be we will never know for sure. Then the mystery becomes most interesting.
To be fair, your own view can be seen as massively convenient. Let’s assume there is no sort of organising intelligence behind reality, and so, after the big bang, amino acids formed into proteins and so on and eventually DNA, which by aimless happenstance and through causal laws eventually formed the conscious human subject. Now, these processes, being utterly random and meaningless, you would expect to produce a mind that is, at the most charitable, merely useful for what it needs to do, which is replicate its DNA. The brain organises sensory nonsense into a coherent model only in so far as this aids reproduction of the organism. But you’re assuming this process has imbibed us with ideal laws, here I mean logic, mathematics, axiomatic a priori systems which cannot be proven but are just taken as true by definition, that are objectively correlative to what is outside our senses and perfectly represent reality. This is like me cumming on my leg and it making the complete works of shakespeare as it dribbles haplessly down my thigh. There is absolutely no reason why aimless, autonomous chemical processes by themselves could create, not even intuit, laws that objectively not only represent but organise all of reality. Our very definition of “true” is circular, and you’re saying this organ that formed itself for the function of food and sex happened to build into itself some apperception of the fundamental laws of reality which we cannot even coherently criticise or articulate because we are built to believe in them biologically. That would be a fairly massive coincidence, and very very convenient for people who wish to employ ideal reasoning without conceding that it necessitates some sort of mental intuition of immaterial, a priori laws with which we have been made with a capacity to utilise and understand. Because without this it would seem inevitable that all our perceptions and thoughts about life are just random incoherent nonsense
Are those laws not based on observable reality? If you have two coconuts and I take two coconuts from you, you have no coconuts. There, I just invented math. Everything else can flow from there. We had maths for a long time before someone came up with the concept of the zero. But serfs knew what zero was before then.
I don't think maths or anything is divine. And I'm not convinced consciousness is the driver. I'm just a slave to this organism that wants to cum in things. Even after I snipped the plumbing, it insists on trying to spread its genetic material.
No they aren’t. Take for instance all bachelors are male. I don’t need to go around asking every bachelor in existence to know they’re male. It’s a statement that is true by force of itself without reference to reality, although reality coheres with it. If I said beaches in the Caribbean are white, that would be a claim you could observe and prove true or false. Stuff like the law of non contradiction etc is the foundation of logic and exists in us as infants, who don’t attempt to do two opposite things at once. Things like 2+2=4 are true by force of themselves, if we were all born blind and unable to count it would still be a true statement, because it is true by definition. You can’t not believe in these things, as you said, a peasant knows what zero is, because it is fundamental to how our brain organises reality for us. Particles can pop into being and will follow these laws. If we are going to employ logical constructs, we need a coherent reason to believe they aren’t arbitrary
Stay on topic. You’re getting frustrated because you’ve been outed as literally not understanding the argument you’ve attacked, and now you’re shifting the topic on what/how God is and the reasoning of his creation.
This is a case of a midwit being unable to comprehend something that is intuitive in to the simple and understood by the intelligent. I’ve already explained to you why materialism is problematic when viewed through the lens of contemporary science, so let’s stay on topic. Do you have an actual defense of materialism or are you just going to try to forget this conversation and move on in life with your demonstrably false material view of the world?
I'm comfortable stating "I don't know". I'm not a scientist or a theologian, I don't study this shit. I just read stuff. I don't have any evidence there was a creator beyond the creation, and maybe there's another explanation. Fields interacting or something. Who knows? Not the religiously inclined. There lies navel-gazing. There lies self-importance.
Hey, worthless essay posting homosexuals, shut your fricking mouth unless you can get your homosexual god down here to shake my hand right this instant.
Shush brainlet.
No, you take your intellectual ass somewhere else where it actually belongs. This here is tard country, boy.
Oh yeah nice digits. Now pipe down.
>Verification not required.
Define "create life". Because I would say modifying an organism is creating life, arguably.
If we can't make Frankensteins monster, it's only because we don't know enough. The divine spark is a Macguffin.
not him but the entire point of the prime mover is that it breaks the chain of causality. the argument is that something needs to be the pure “beingness” that all other things are conditioned on, the necessary being. it cannot be material reality, which we know is contingent, therfore it is an immaterial reality. the chain doesn’t need to continue past that point because you’re no longer having to explain how a temporal series of events came into being, because there’s no mechanical, contingent physics in something immaterial, nor is there time. if they say the basis of existence must be eternal, that it cannot have come to be because then there is infinite regress, you can’t then use infinite regress as an argument. causal reality regresses. immateriality isn’t causal or contingent, it sufficiently explains itself
I just think the disciplined NEET lifestyle is neat. It's channeled autism in the most productive and fulfilling way I can think of.
How many do you know and how well do you know them?
It might be true, but how would you know that?
you think monks don't frick each other in the ass? wow
medieval christian monks were known for it, they also had nuns over all the time. celibacy isn't real
i’m sure it went on but I don’t think it’s universal or that you could apply it to all of them. remember that in the middle ages monasticism was a lay institution, as in most people could enter an abbey by free choice, they weren’t middle/ upper class and born into it like priests. some people genuinely just want that sort of life
>i’m sure it went on but I don’t think it’s universal or that you could apply it to all of them
i wouldn't say all of them are happy with their lives from meeting a couple of them either, I'd even say most are miserable
Nobody said all of them were happy, but some of them certainly are. They’re not forced to be monks. As for saying that most are miserable, this is blatant ideological projection. You dislike what they represent so you’re just telling me what they are and not basing it on anything.
Maybe Cinemaphileners are upset because they base so much of their life around sex (porn, gooning, celeb worship) but have no actual sex. Ever.
Imagine your favorite thing in life is kinos, and you're never allowed near a screen or projector. You can do anything EXCEPT watch a movie or show.
I don’t think Cinemaphile is a monolith and to be fair most of the people who seethe at monks are probably reddit adjacent. But your point about sex obsession is very true of some here. The specific brand of fox and grapes woman hate local to this place is because sex is seen as the key to a happy and socially successful life. They can’t find any other locus of meaning or success, to sex and access to sex pollinates into their opinion on everything.
>sex is seen as the key to a happy and socially successful life
That's like 80% correct and only 20% wrong, at most.
No one truly "happy and socially successful" is not having sex with a partner. Nor are they an incel for 25 years and suddenly become totally normal and achieve a "happy and socially successful life".
Isaac newton died a virgin. So at least some people can be socially successful and incel
Where's the evidence he was "socially successful"?
he was head of the royal academy of science and could effectively bully anyone who questioned him into a pariah. he did so with leibniz
a monk killed my father
Are you boba fett
>people who don’t live like me are miserable!
>says miserable Cinemaphilener
Monks were fricking the nuns and each other and me and my fellow modern day incels ain't fricking anything but our hands to anime girls and Jenna Ortega.
>Monks were fricking the nuns and each other and me
did you enjoy it?
>celibacy isn't real
But I celibacy is very real.
Fun fact: the original meaning of celibate is one who does not marry. "Chastity" is the word for sexual activity.
Since sex out of wedlock was a sin, one could not have sex piously unless one married. There's the rub.
Incelibacy*
I will find and kill every Google engineer, I swear by Allah.
like leftists who say frodo and sam are gay. just pure mental illness
Yeah and monks went to extreme lengths to interact with women as little as possible. Being around women and not being able to frick them is so psychologically damaging for some men that they chose to lock themselves away on a monastery hidden in the mountains for the rest of their lives just to avoid them. Like the entire idea is to separate themselves from women so they could focus on their spiritual life.
>men need sexual release
>n-no porn, sex toys, imagination wet dreams don’t count it has to be a woman
>sh-she has to also be enthusiastic about it
Sorry pal but there’s no power on earth that can make a woman enthusiastic about blowing an unattractive guy. You literally present an impossible solution and blame leftists for its absence.
>it has to be a woman
Yes. Masturbation is not sex. Orgasm is not intimacy.
>she has to be enthusiastic about it
Yes.
>no power on earth that can make a woman enthusiastic about blowing an unattractive guy
This is true, which is why so many men are chronically depressed
> blame leftists for its absence
I blame leftists for downplaying, gaslighting, and mocking sexually displaced men who did nothing wrong. I also blame them for their hypocrisy and unwillingness to espouse bootstrap rhetoric to all disadvantaged peoples EXCEPT for an easy target like involuntary celibates.
Spoken like someone who's never been without food / water / shelter
Yes.
My girlfriend is definitely always hornier than I am. Sometimes I wonder if the fact she can't has kids makes me not in the mood to frick her.
Some days it seems I only live to bust the fattest of nuts.
this
since discovering masturbation all my other talents have deteriorated but I can drop loads like a pro
>Since discovering masturbation
How fricking old are you? You need to be 18 to post here zoomie.
It took me a while to figure it out
I'm a little slow, give me a break
I'm pretty sure I figured it out when I was 10. Wasn't even molested, it was like, instinctual.
To be fair I was a randy kid, always trying to swipe porno mags and watch HBO for the breasts.
In his defense it does take some practice to pull off.
jej
I was humping pillows, cushions, couches, mattresses, throw pillows, the floor, the arms of couches, computer chairs, water in the bathtub, etc. until I was like 12 or 13. Jerking off with my right hand just felt awkward and weird, too awkward to actually get off. I just happened to be home sick one day when I decided to jerk off to some ecchi anime girls on my computer and happened to try with my left hand while using the mouse. Everything clicked in that moment.... I'm a left handed fapper. I'm also left handed in hockey and it's more comfortable for me to box southpaw.
I also tried the left hand but I'm too clumsy. Decent for keeping a hard-on but not for finishing.
That's how it feels for me using my right hand. It's just oddly clumsy and I can't finish.
I didn't know about or how to jerk off until 24
I hate sex and I hate women
unbased.
women are pitiful and they deserve hate,but their holes are nice to use.
yeah
all men have been socialized by porn and movies where sex is the most important thing in life, we have to work hard to not be horny every day
ah frick off, moron.
Why
It feels better than anything and it's a special gift only someone who likes you can give you.
Who knew all those prostitutes *liked* me!
I didn't want to add that in, but yeah either she likes you or it costs $150.
>It feels better than anything
You must have never taken heroin
Genuinely it's about intimacy and knowing someone is willing to indulge in you as an animal. It's letting your guard down in a very intimate way.
Also peepee feel gud
I think it's as simple as
>Monkeys are pro-social animals
>Yes strong monkey can rape weak monkey
>But if weak monkey is enthusiastic, all the better. Strong monkey will reciprocate.
i fricked a blonde milf today, yes, it will make you happy
From my POV I think we suffer from internal love issues and external lust issues. We can only resolve each one at a time.
Women only exist to satisfy men
idk man blowjobs in particular never did it for me.
It literally always has been. It only stopped APPEARING as important when christcucks banned brothels and the like, and now no one is happy.
yeah man christianity is finally declining and now we have all the degeneracy we can handle
its time for your theory to bear fruit wouldnt you say
Yeah but people are having sex without philosophy.
If you frick without philosophy you are just an animal, rutting in the dirt. That's what porn is.
st augsutine said “ban prostitution and you will fill the world with sodomy”. it was banned or prohibited throughout the entirety of the middle ages. stop conflating america with “christianity”
*NOT banned
Sorry it’s 3am in my country.
I read the Catholic Church owned and operated brothels, so that pure maidens would not be ravaged.
How many priests and Popes helped themselves to the company stock, I wonder? More than a few probably.
>church is bad because they outlawed prostitution
>actually they didn’t
>really? well now i’ve 180d and actually the church was hosting orgies endlessly
The church didn’t own them. Back then clergy were often high ranking figures in secular society, there wasn’t the separation of church and state we have today. So they inherited and procured land which would sometimes include brothels, which obviously as lords they got income from. But the church didn’t own them, some individuals who worked for the church owned them- the church didn’t get any of that income.
ywnbaw
Men are always horny, the only peace we get is 10-20 minutes after cumming
No it isn't.
Coomers are just very loud online and call everyone who isn't a coomer 'gay'.
most men won't admit it, but getting your gf to finger your ass or simply cup your balls in her hand and cuddle is the best way to feel better after a hard day
i used to come home from work and suckle on my gfs teet as she fingered my ass while we watched reruns of friends
>getting your gf to finger your ass
peggayS get the rope
I have never had a day that would not be immediately improved by getting a blowjob from a pretty girl.
How is her changing her hairstyle gonna make Aragorn's day noticeably less shitty?
She is putting her hair in a ponytail so it won't get in the way of her next step, which is a blowjob to make his day get better.
Sounds fricking awful
>Says weird shit like 'ah yeah suck that wiener' as if that isn't what she's doing
this is one of the most autistic pics ive ever seen on the net.
and thats a lot to say.
then you need to go back
Me at ikea.
wow, what a hot woman! I want to search her porn so that I can jerk off to her.
>
God I love natural-redheads especially with natural milkers, what's her name?
bet she has a tight pussy
we hang
>Sarina Valentina
>Transsexual, Porn Actress, 35 yrs
Lol, so trannies finally DO pass huh?
newbie
there is always one huh
>large ring finger
Stay safe anons
That's a big hand
You just wait until you see her dick
Dude, that's a Man!!!
I forgot this was how the virgin vs chad was supposed to be
Too many tourists ruined it
There was a fundamental misunderstanding on newbies and normies part that the "Chad" thing was supposed to be good and admirable, not absurd and outrageous.
Idiots using the meme to flaunt how based their opinions are "look chad likes the thing I like!"
These guys get it.
I'm in physical pain because of how hard I laughed at this.
is it possible to learn Chad’s power?
Oh we're pretending this is funny now? Okay I guess.
yall homies never getting laid
Sex is overrated my dude
Sexhavers should be taxed. The tax is out into a trust. The trust will arrange for KHHV to have kisses, hand-holds, hugs and sex with women for volunteer for the duty, with compensation from the trust coffers.
I'm confident we could solve the virginity crisis with something as modest as a 2pc tax on sales to sexhavers. No need to dip into their incomes.
Nice reaction image, homosexual
Don't need to, I can self suck
I miss when virgin vs chad was about chad doing this kind of insane ridiculous behavior and the virgin being normal instead of "The Virgin [your politics/religion] vs. The Chad [my politics/religion]."
nobody remembers the wizard
same, laughed so hard I fricking cried, I miss when Cinemaphile was mostly funny and not jaded homosexuals arguing over politics
Jesus Christ i hate this place...
You can always go back
I completely forgot what thread I was after reading this.
>Completely focused. Could kill himself if not careful
That sounds gay.
>Women sucking dicks is gay
Explain yourself right now
dick sucking is gay because 50% of the act involves a male penis cumming.
Yeah a male penis cumming into a woman's mouth or hand. Shits hot and definitionally heterosexual.
Wouldn't that mean that any sex you have is gay?
no, because i only frick the finest transwomen
>two male penises cumming
literally double gay (aka 100% gay) by your metric, breh
Oooooh
bump
I have the biggest penis on this board and I've never touched the toilet water
Whatabout the poop-shelf
I hate these so much why do they make them?
American women are so fat they can sometimes be pregnant and not know it all the way up to having the baby. It's not a poop shelf, it's a baby blocker. It's so average american pig woman doesn't squirt the baby directly down the toilet bowl and into the sewer where it will grow up to be average american sewer monster AKA Texan.
Literally so that you can inspect your poop before flushing. It's an old fashioned thing.
They don't even exist in America and in Europe they're largely phased out: https://noplacelikeanywhere.com/destinations/europe/netherlands/bathroomsoftheworld-dutch-toilets-and-the-poop-shelf/
Just sit on it the proper way, legs straddling the tank. Also lets you put your coffee mug and cereal bowl on the tank as a table.
Do Germans really?
how the frick do you guy's toilets stay so clean? mine is all crusty and yellow all over the rim and seat
Clean your fricking toilet you disgusting mongoloid.
It's called ABRASIVES and NOT BEING A b***h
>being this afraid of a little bacteria
lmao, you're such fricking gays, your ancestors would have laughed at you
>ancestors
which ones, literal apes or boomers?
If you're not the only one using it's Black person tier not to clean it.
>how the frick do you guy's toilets stay so clean?
wtf? clean it. Use toilet cleaner and a scrub brush. Fricking animal.
you have to clean it, bleach, toilet brush, don't let the piss sit in the toilet for too long, wash it down.
honestly revolting. sooner or later the bathroom storks will call your place home.
>tfw the toilet the bathroom storks chose is cleaner than mine
capo, ponele el liquido verde, EL LIQUIDO VERDE
you have a nice toilet made for men then, 4 out of 5 toilets i have shitted on, my dick touched the water, and once time my balls touched it too, it's probably because these fricking times when everything is made for women.
morons confuse touching the wet sides of the bowl with water. Happens all the time if you have a flaccid more than 4 inches.
like so
Who pees through the gap of the toilet and the seat here?
are you doing that for the challenge or do you just like getting piss everywhere?
I had that happen once at a dinner party and sprayed pias all over my pants and sock. Thank God I had black pants on.
My balls touch the water when they feel like being super saggy, but never my pp because I'm a grower.
If you have that much water in your toilet bowl you have some fricked up plumbing.
Europoor detected
One time my wife asked me what I do with my dick and balls when I'm taking a shit and I asked what did she mean. She was like "do you just let them dangle there" and I laughed and said yes. She then got kinda grossed out thinking about my junk being essenced by the poop vapors. I didn't have the heart to tell her that sometimes my dick touches the inside of the bowl too.
This is why I always shower after taking a shit
just shit in the shower
just shower in shit
Just wash it in the basin 🙂
ask her where she puts her vag00 when she
she probably puts on one of those autistic white bandaids japanese girls use in anal only porn.
what
Sounds like a moron. Did she think they were retractable? I mean they kinda are but not in demand.
Women are gross for sucking dick tbh
I'm a hetero male and I've also sucked penis. It's real nice. It's fun.
>That's gay. You're gay
No, gay is an identity thing. I'm not attracted to men. Just penises.
>I'm not a furry I just want to have sex with furries
Nah furry shit is gay as hell
I preferred to be nude when having sex
>gf is a nurse and is adamant I wash my hands after every time I pee
>she has sucked my dick literally minutes after peeing multiple times
>woken up early in the morning by intense need to shit
>morning wood at full mast
>know I'll touch the rim, don't want a UTI
>can't just stay out, have to piss as well
When I'm having a shitty day sex is the last thing I want to do.
if you are american you should know that getting a bj doesnt count as sex.
It's literally called oral sex.
https://edition.cnn.com/ALLPOLITICS/1998/08/17/time/clinton.html
>Clinton may have been given the room to offer a technically "true" denial to the question of whether he had sex with Lewinsky--even if she happened to perform fellatio on him. The truncated definition characterizes sex in terms of a checklist of body parts, including the genitals, breast and thigh. Oral sex would not necessarily require the President to touch anything on Lewinsky that appears on that list.
Slightly off topic, but do you guys ever get frustrated with your girlfriend or wife not giving bj's, and think to yourself "man, if the situation was reversed and I was the chick I'd give killer frickin blowjobs twice a day. I'd be a complete bawd, I'd be the BJ GOAT."
Then you have to stop yourself from thinking what you'd actually do, like technique-wise, because that would be gay.
I mean what's the big deal? Women are so frustrating like like that.
>t. not gay, doesn't like dudes or want to suck dick myself
>do you guys ever get frustrated with your girlfriend or wife
no
I know a girl that looks like that. She's indian
you are right anon this post isnt homosexual alone.
thinking about specific techniques to use when you relieve your men friends of stress is perfectly ok.
My wife gagged and choked the first time she tried it on me and has been extremely apprehensive ever since. It kind of sucks that I'll never get a truly enthusiastic bj.
Holy shit. Are you me?
>get frustrated with your girlfriend or wife not giving bj's
If your girlfriend/wife doesn't suck your dick she's not attracted to you and will probably cuck you at some point. Not being willing to suck your dick should be an absolute dealbreaker, I mean she's basically cucking you because I know she isn't a fricking virgin and I know she's sucked Chad's dick in the past or would suck Chad's dick in the future.
She's saying you're not Chad enough for her to lower herself to the act of putting her partner's wiener in her mouth.
I guess it's similar to women being frustrated with men for not knowing how to finger them or eat them out
"I'll show you the proper technique"
The situation does have to be reversed. You can eat her out. If you're eating her out but not getting bjs idk what to tell you.
>eat her out
Don't wanna get cancer.
I had this convo with my friends recently and they all agreed if they were a woman they would suck wiener as much as possible
sigh
>gay man states that if he were a woman he would suck even more wiener than he already does
More news at eleven.
Lmao all 5 of us are married and one one is my brother in law
You all helped each other find a beard?
Why didn't you guys try it out? Sucking your buds is cool and hetero.
Is that Nikki hailey?
>i think more about giving other people blowjobs than women BUT IM NOT GAY
>all these anons agreeing
Do blowjobs really feel that good?
they feel better than penetration using a condom if done right,because you actually have skin to skin contact without a barrier.
I've never enjoyed them. I came exactly once from a blowjob, and it was so weak I had to ask her if I came.
That same girl who did make me cum with one had an amazing vegana. Like melted butter. I loved fricking her so it was all good. First and only time she blew me. I went down on her a lot too.
Yes, on the receiving end, I bet it's a pain to give it to someone, all that spit and the inhability to breathe doesn't sound good, if a woman does it and enjoys it, she must be either a trooper or a huge bawd.
I wonder if dick scent is relevant on the matter, maybe after the first 10 seconds.
It feels only mildly pleasurable but I also have a circumcized wiener.
I had sex once, no condom. Couldn't cum. The foreign feeling of her touching my dick with her hand to start, and making out with lots of frenching, sucking her breasts were all more pleasurable activities than her sucking on my dick, or awkwardly fricking her pussy.
only big wieners get satisfaction from intercourse, way to out yourself as a small dick loser
bait
I like my girl to run her tongue under the foreskin. Feels amazing.
>I like my girl to run her tongue under the foreskin. Feels amazing.
doesn't she mind the cheese?
>t. delusional cutgay
not really
the only thing they’re good for is desensitizing you a bit so you don’t bust in 2 pumps when you get to the pussy
Yes. Of course.
All the long winded answers before this one are from literal virgins and completely inexperienced LARPers.
How could your hard Dick not feel amazing in a beautiful woman’s hot wet mouth. Is fantastic.
I've probably had more sex than you. Still don't care for blowjobs.
Wet pussy all day everyday
I got a bj from a massage parlor, first one in 5 years and I had forgotten how good they feel, came in like 5 min maybe less. Then I crashed my car on the way home and the woman I hit had the same name as the woman that gave me the bj, AMA
Yeah if you're not circumcised. Better than sex.
They're mediocre as frick, it's more of a mental thing that guys get off on.
Like the woman serving him.
No, they feel better than veganal sex. The lips plus suction plus tongue action all combine to deliver a much more nuanced and layered sensational experience that provides far more pleasure. I would say that veganal sex is the one that's more mental because of our natural monkey-brained obsession with domination and impregnation. But in terms of pure sensation and what feels better, blowjobs are far and away the more intense and worthwhile experience.
Jesus Christ coomers are embarrassing
Stop building up this fantasy in your head and actually go get a BJ.
I've had plenty of them. I'm speaking from experience, not imagination or fantasy.
Sure you are kid.
Vag alone is not all the great. Just a wet hole really. But it's everything else about it. Like missionary when you're laying in her and you feel her breasts squished up against you and you feel her writhing in pleasure under you.
Like most sexual things, they can be bad if performed by a teenaged incompetent but when they’re good they’re amazing.
I know it’s a Cinemaphile meme to mock passionate sex scenes but I’ve gotten head so good I was shouting.
Virgin hands typed this.
I don't know who you're trying to impress, we're all anon here.
I’m 39 years old. I’ve been married for 9 years. Before meeting my wife at age 25, I had 18 different sexual partners.
Also I contemplate suicide near daily.
>cant even keep his lies realistic
lmao it's so pathetic.
No one would blink an eye if you said you had 4 different sexual partners.
18 is ridiculous though because everyone stops counting at like 8+, only a undersexed coping homosexual would think 18 is a normal claim.
>everyone stops counting at 8
I thought we were all sexless morons here, anon. How would you know that “everyone” stops at 8?
Oh, and I own a house and have over $100,000 in savings.
I said 'like 8' not 8.
Fricking mongrel.
The point is that no mentally well man keeps counting as high as 18.
>own a house
Oh wow bravo.
Do you think that's an achievement?
People want a good house, not just a house.
When did I claim to be mentally well?
You were claiming that I could not know what a blowjob feels like because all anons are sexless losers.
My point is that you can be a loser no matter your sex-having status.
honest to god you sound like a foid pretending to be a man. type like one too. breasts now
I always got along well with women. Anyway, goodnight you no pussy getting blackpilled zoomer homosexual.
sweet dreams, roastie. try not to suck too many dicks on your way to bed
>hey can be bad if performed by a teenaged incompetent
not if you yourself are a teenage incompetent. My first gf started out thinking a little bit of teeth was a good thing and I still couldn't get enough. Any bj is better than no bj as long as you're attracted to the person.
the disgust and gagging and feeling sick enough to call off school for the rest of the day sorta warped my mind a little
why did the library even have a bathroom on the top story completely hidden away from everything
Its because most of the riders were women anyways.
She got the hat Gondor Gluk
What? She is a woman. Do you mean "no one figured out she WAS a woman?" Go back to your shitting street, sar
What if she has passed on? Then she was a woman.
I don't like blowjobs. Most women are sloppy in the form and honestly vegana feels so much better.
Why did this stupid fricking image make me laugh so hard?
It's not only the bj it's also the thrill of making her degrade herself sucking on your wiener, gagging on it, making muffled moaning sounds while you grab her by the hair and pull and make the head bounce on it while calling her a filthy fricking prostitute
Why's she putting up her hair? She should get Aragorn his onahole and make him a playlist of hentai music videos and Overwatch cumpilations. Maybe send him hentai over discord while pretending she's an anime girl. That's the way a KING improves their day. By gooning.
I don't understand the picture.
come on son
What do you mean? I bet she gives great ring.
which movie?
SAW 7/SAW 3D
I get it. It's a blowjob joke.
>have seen so much depraved porn in my life its unreal
>had absolutely no idea this was supposed to be about a blowjob
weird
Yeah it’s something you need to have sex to understand. A porn prostitute is ready to shoot once the camera starts rolling. Your girl isn’t always going to have her hair in a ponytail before you start getting frisky
I don't watch porn involving real life people, I feel like that would frick you up inside, only Coco Bandicoot and goblin girls
In my rewatch I found her much more annoying than I remembered. She has that constant near-crying but angry looking I'M ACTING face.
Every time I’ve posted my wiener on grindr asking for a blowjob, I’ve had a dude over within the hour and sucking me to completion. Why even bother with women?
A bunch of newbies itt
>Aragorn
that's not arwen tho