>I was at the supermarket the other day
>moron voice: OHHH HE’S GONNA TALK ABOUT THE HOTPOCKETS AGAIN, THAT’S WHY HE’S SO FAT
>I went up and bought some Hot Pockets
>moron voice: WOW, HE REALLY LOVES THOSE HOT POCKETS
>I was at the supermarket the other day
Lol
Bob Odenkirk isn’t funny.
>moron voice: BUT THAT’S JIM GAFFIGAN, NOT BOB ODENKIRK, WHAT THE HECK IS HE TALKING ABOUT
Jim Gaffigan, who? I thought that was Kevin Costner and I then called him Bob Odenkirk, like the joke from Breaking Bad.
stand up comedians aernt funny...it's all expectancy behavior and conditioned. One of the lowest forms of humor.
Performance humor like Nathan For You would be a high form of humor.
South Park is also sometimes high humor
I honestly think you might be moronic
He's still better than most of the subhumans who do standup.
I chuckled. This is better than his actual standup.
Non-burger here, what do hot pockets taste like?
Frozen pizza.
From the low end I'm guessing
Yes, it's no Heggies that's for sure
frick heggies
>what do hot pockets taste like?
Like undercooked pizza with cheap tomato sauce, except the outside is hot enough to make the inside of your mouth look like the guy from the end of Robocop. At the same time, the inside of the hotpocket is frozen like a hockey puck.
You aren’t following the directions on the box correctly, they have to sit for like two minutes to properly cook
>You aren’t following the directions on the box correctly
>wait!
>I can't make the hotpocket yet
>I have to read
>the box
lava
Like if someone microwaved a cheap frozen pizza, and there were parts of it still frozen yet other parts were nuclear hot. You are not missing anything, its just cheap food that is recognized mostly for how cheap and bad it is.
If you don't nuke everything at 100% power and use less power / more time, you can heat them evenly, but it's mostly toasted, bland crust/bread with maybe 2 good bites of pizza stuff (pepperoni, cheese, sauce).
that'll be 10,000 monies please
just put the hotpockets in the microwave for 2 minutes per pocket and don't immediatley eat them like an animal and they are fine. these babies were pure kino
God damn this looks like kino. My shitty little town only carries the pepperoni or ham and cheese. Sometimes I hate moving to the country but the benefits outweigh it
don't worry they discontinued it like years ago, still mad about it. my supermarket in the city also only does ham and cheese or pepperoni now.
>I'm not offended, but I have to go
>moron voice
the term is "sotto voce"
you're sotto
chinese chris farley lookin mfer
The late. Night. Convenient store, shopping trip.
What is it about this that causes complete strangers to want to talk to you?
I went into a 7-11 late at night recently, and there's a guy in front of me at the counter. He puts down a dozen donuts, two bags of Doritos, and a rotten banana.
Now I'm not one to judge a man's 7-11 purchases, that's between him and God. But now he's decided, I'm somehow involved.
He turns to me and says "My girlfriend just had surgery and she can only eat certain things".
I look at him and go "Yeah, what'd she have, a bong hit transplant?"
Lmao it's amazing that /misc/tards buy into this shit. Gaffigan is a papist same as Biden and the entire Supreme Court. Whether you're Christian or not, the Catholics control the most meaningful parts of the government and media and you're watching Biden and Pope Francis play 5D chess with the Anglo Saxon Protestant west that your grandfathers fought and died to preserve.
You forgot to put
>moron voice:
>when the hot pocket burns the roof of your mouth