*is unfunny in your path*
*is unfunny in your path*
This phonograph "reads" a rock’s rough surface and transforms it into beautiful ambient music pic.twitter.com/PYDzYsWWf8
— Surreal Videos (@SurrealVideos) March 3, 2023
*is unfunny in your path*
This phonograph "reads" a rock’s rough surface and transforms it into beautiful ambient music pic.twitter.com/PYDzYsWWf8
— Surreal Videos (@SurrealVideos) March 3, 2023
incels will never understand
crying and posting a picture of your bitch face because you sent your daughter to over priced super privilege school isnt something any man should understand.
Used to be something called self-respect
>comedian
>can't tell one joke
Lmao what a fucking loser.
Yo, what the fuck are you talking about? Brett Kreischer is fucking hilarious. Have you ACTUALLY seen his stand-up specials or listened to his podcasts? The guy knows how to tell a fucking story and keep you laughing the whole time. Maybe your sense of humor is just as dry as your grandma's pussy.
fuck why. I don't even want to remember this person exists.
schaub is unironically 100 times funnier and better "cawmedian" than bum kreischer, have a nice day
I hope you're not serious anon. You're comment is funnier than anything that tool releases.
you literally said that fucking bert kreischer is funny
you arent allowed to comment on "comedy"
No, bert is not funny.
also me
at this point I'm convinced this moron posts here, there's weekly threads about his shows and whatnot. he's not even subtle about it
I think you'd be surprised b
go back, jose
oh hunnit percent b, but i disagree
>maybe your sense of humor is as dry as your grandmothers pussy
awful
0/10, fuck off Bert.
Haha I laugh when he takes his shirt off all the time. I’m like OHHH SNAP THERE GOES THE SHIRT, this comedy is about to get fucking REAL up in here! Motherfucker can tell a completely-made up story as if it was true like nobody else
The only thing worse than his inability to tell a joke is that some random youtuber turned a 15 second engagement into a 3 minute video.
Your voice is worse than his jokes.
He could have told them about his ass hairs or done a hacky redneck voice that anyone can do. C'mon, big guy.
>instantly whips out the retarded machine bit
Holy shit he really doesn't have anything else in him other than that fake as fuck story does he? I can't even call The Machine a joke, it's just an obnoxious frat guy story jacking himself off abput how cool he is.
this. and people will defend him and say it's legit.
>tell me a joke
>i robbed a train with the russian mafia
so what, am i supposed to stand there for 20 minutes while you tell a made up story about it? thats not a joke, Bert
I turned off his new special within 5 minutes, it's grotesque.
>having a daughter and dropping her off to get railed by countless random guys
Lol
Lmao
Imagine obsessing about being your daughter's pussy guardian while she gets admitted to Yale as an adult. You either raised her properly or you didn't.
>dumb rich bitch taking feminism at yale
no way he raised her right
She's taking feminism? What are you even trying to say? This is such a weird cope even for here.
he's said that his daughters are freaks that use pronouns, it's not hard to put 2 and 2 together.
k
Okay dude but no way at some point she isn't tonguing some guy's anus she barely met and rubbing semen all over her face
According to Roman Law, your daughter is your property until you marry her off to an acceptable suitor.
ok im moving to rome
where is it
kys reddit
seethe bitch
>he's still here 4 hours later
actually pathetic
>t. cuck with daughter
He has a good, contagious laugh, otherwise not a great comedian, writer or even physical actor.
That said, he is very much the spenny to tom seguras kenny. I do think Tom is actually a decent writer, has great delivery and timing etc.
>He has a good, contagious laugh
this has to be a bait
Not bait. He's a shitty comedian, lacking depth and tells one good story he's been riding since his early 20's. But when that fat, racist fucker starts laughing, I also want to laugh.
You're an NPC. That laugh is CLEARLY fake as fuck. I've never seen anyone try so hard to weeze laugh as him, it's insanely obnoxious and gay.
>That said, he is very much the spenny to tom seguras kenny.
I don't speak gay what does this mean?
Bert is a great punching bag. If you haven't seen kenny vs spenny get the off /misc/
This show was never funny
t.zoomer
Kenny vs Spenny was revolutionary television, nobody has been able to create anything like it since, and half of the shit they did would never be allowed on TV again. There are really bad episodes of course, and the comedy can be very crass, but overall it's a great show. Where else could you see someone take a shit in their pants and keep them on for 3 days? Take acid? Smoke weed for 3 days? Get a blowjob from a ladyboy? etc. etc. nothing came close back then.
Thanks for explaining.
>muh sneed
the fakeness makes me hate it
>He has a good, contagious laugh, otherwise not a great comedian, writer or even physical actor
wtf is wrong with you
>He has a good, contagious laugh
>HEEHEEHEEEHEEEHEEEHEEEHEEEEHE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>HE DRANK 30 BEEERS!!!!
Damn imagine dropping your daughter off knowing she's gonna spend the next 4 years having 100+ sexual partners and YOU have to pay for it all.
Also.... THE MACHINE!
LE MACHINE!!!!
Even the comments on his videos are just people complaining about him. Does he have a genuine fanbase at all?
he was on matt and shane and he ruined the episode
Pretty much every guest makes the show noticably worse except for big gay bill and the spudman
The episodes with louie, colín quinn or joey derosa are fucking unwatchable
ya a lot of the guests suck, especially louis ck and derosa
they need some of the following back on
>luis j gomez
>puppy girl jenna
>adam egget
>john mcafee (f)
>gerbies (the gruel king)
>>adam egget
it's Egret
>adam egret, formerly cultist sneed
I’m listening to the back catalog and always skip guest episodes. The Presidents episodes with Louie and just Shane by himself are kino tho
there's a lot of shitty guests, but you're also missing out on some of the best eps
I like the formulaic nature of tuning and it’s always the same two people. If I see a guest I’m already a fan of, I’ll listen, but other than that, they’re just getting in the way of my audio comfort food
I wonder what it would be like if he hung out with Kevin Smith. Just crying and smoking weed and jerking each other off into KFC buckets.
Stop bullying my friends. We comedians are the funniest and best people in the world and completely in touch with with reality
>we're artists and philosophers
>only a 1000 of us in the world
HAHAHAHAHA
Its like a mass hypnosis
>Having a daughter
>Sending her to college
Is there anything more cucked? Good God
They call me LE MACHINE
>muh KEEEDS
Him and Tom Segura can fucking die young, please. Bragging about having cum trophies isn't comedy.
>Bragging about having cum trophies isn't comedy.
Fucking someone tell Chris Rock this. He blew like 20 minutes talking about his daughter like we give a shit about her accomplishments or how spoiled she is
Comedians tend to talk about what they know, even if it's about comedy voids like their kids
Nothing is funny about children but I know why they do it.
Parents love a good circle jerk about how awesome they are for raising the next generation of wagies.
>He has a good, contagious laugh
bruh
As comedians/storytellers/entertainers from that circle...
Tom Segura > Ari Shafir = Joey Diaz > LARGE GAP > Duncan Trussell > Bert Chrysler > Joe Rogan > Brendan Schuab or wtv
Alright, what the fuck went wrong with Schaub?
I personally don't find him very quick witted or funny. In podcasts he comes across as someone with a bloated ego and very little character. He's sort of an NPC tier human who would rather look at his shoes than dish a good story. Very little cultural significance. Joey Diaz and Duncan Trussell, are both lackluster stage comedians, but bring a ton of character to the table, whether its Joey's stories or Duncan's light hearted approach to philosphy, love etc, they are unique and enjoyable.
Ari Shafir and Tom Segura are great comedians, Joe Rogan is a decent facilitator, bad interviewer. Bert is a great punching bag, having him in the room is good for the other comedians to beat on and he takes it. Brendan though, just overall not someone I jive with at all.
duncan doesn't feel like he belongs in that group, i like him more as a hippie moron than a comedian
I like that when Duncan is around, the atmosphere chills tf out and other guests get into more intimate convos. Love me some Duncan.
I used to listen to his podcast but I became pretty grossed out by all the new age shit. A lot of it just feels cringe as shit, and this is coming from someone who went through the whole psychedelics/Ram Dass/Terence McKenna shit as a kid.
he works better as a guest
What about bobby Lee and that ginger gay I keep seeing on my YouTube recommended
ginger fag is funny with bobby because he's openly racist to his face
Bobby lee is sort of cringe imo. I think he's a good TV comedian, but in podcasts I think hes just gross. No idea who the ginger is. If you are referring to Bill Burr - He's based af. Louis CK - Old stuff was great, anything post jizzing in a plant is just sad, I feel like he started so crusty and disgusting he never left room to grow.
The two/three maybe even 4 specials Louis did before his latest one at MSG were fucking solid.
Yeah, I guess I agree I did find them funny. But the most recent one was just a bit heavy on the pedophile jokes, the shock factor wore off quickly and it got boring.
I miss the king imo, the funniest of them all, he was able to be shocking but so charming at the same time. Stand back a few feet and realize the comedy was just a veneer over a deeper truth he was spitting. RIP Patrice.
i wonder if he would have a terrible podcast if he were alive today
He had one when he was alive. The Black Phillip Show. One thing is for certain Patrice would take the losing/weaker stance on a topic just so he could argue more and get more laughs doing it. I really would have liked to hear his takes on all the current movies.
patrice during trump would have been hilarious
Patrice would've loved every moment of making people uncomfortable by expressing open fondness of Trump and his policies. I wonder how he would have felt about all the cop shit though. I mean God just to have an interesting conversation you know he'd be stirring the pot and have Anthony in a fervor or Dipaolo tanking the hits and dishing it back as hard or harder than Patrice gives it. And it would all be clever, funny, informative and give you a better perspective of both sides. 'Cuz even if you disagree with some shit you engage it by placing it against your beliefs and if you come out the other side with more resolve more power to you. O&A was good for that, man.
Patton Oswald doesn't miss his wife.
A-at least w-we got Jim Jefferies on his podcast pretending to be an ignorant dumbass about every single topic known to man.
That clown lost his credibility when he had that stupid Comedy Central show when he coincidentally parroted every single viewpoint the mainstream media has. You can't go back to pretending you're edgy after a flop like that.
>the most recent one was just a bit heavy on the pedophile jokes, the shock factor wore off quickly and it got boring.
Dude! You could totally tell Louis wanted to go from gross-out points but the crowd just wasn't fucking feeling it all that much. Which sucks because he hyped it up as MSG and being in front of the biggest crowd of people he's ever done, 18k, and yet the crowd didn't light up for him like I was expecting. Look at Bill Burr's latest special. The crowd fucking loved him and you could tell he was feeding off that energy and serving it right back with fervor. That was a dynamite combination for him. Louis by comparison just didn't have that. You could tell he was padding for time when he went to his foreign voices bit. Like, he did an extended foreign voices bit during his 2020 special and he had more fun doing it then. Really had a "fuck let's try and get past the next few minutes" there right in the middle of his act. You could tell that's when the steam kinda left and he went into a more normal routune. Still tried to shock and awe with a couple of edgy jokes but read the crowd and tried to get them in other ways that either succeeded or didn't. Can't remember. I give it a 7/10 out of bias for Louis but it's probably a little lower than that. For a guy about to take a year off from touring and any stand up he went out with something of a fart on this one.
yeah I felt bad for him
I bet he would have died over the current state of media
Holy shit I remember that moment
>hope he gets cancer
In minecraft of course, right anon?
no, not in minecraft, anon. I am actively giving Burt aggressive stage 4 cancer using only the power of telepathy and cancermancy.
>cancermancy
>Billy boy
>based
lel
lmeo
Cucked so hard the Earth shook.
He’s probably talking about Andrew santino
Louis recently did a 3 hour podcast with Shane Gillis about all the presidents, it was actually pretty entertaining. Free on YouTube.
Joey's a good storyteller and I like how open he is about his degeneracy
My favorite is Jeff Garland telling Joe that stool-fucking isn't comedy
>Yale
Ok bro
Fat racist.
hes a pathetic moron lover just like you
*fakes his annoying laugh in your way*
redbar is watching
Let's have a quick recap:
>tall, dark, and handsome
>successful high school athlete
>could have played in the NFL but decided his passion for MMA was too great
>top tier MMA fighter, knocked out the GOAT heavyweight Cro Cop
>successful podcaster and comedian, worth millions
>hot wife and many side pieces
>saved several children from a fiery car crash, national hero
What the fuck have you done bitch?
I made people laugh
oh, I dont doubt that people laugh at you
Could poke big holes in all of those b
Cool, he's just not entertaining. Maybe if I was into MMA I'd enjoy seeing him on a /misc/
ya bloggbuster
This fucking webm gets slower everytime I see it.
>What the fuck have you done bitch?
Drugs and racism if you must know.
Bert Kreischer is Robert Baratheon
Feeling any kind of emotion and your brain defaulting to 'take a selfie and post it on social media!' seems so bizarre
Jesus what a gay. It's just a kid not being in your house for a while. Don't go all Kevin Smith on us you unfunny fuck.
saw his comedy special thing like 2 years ago, the guys is a the epitome of american, fat loud and stupid and popular among the masses.
He's crying because he knows everything he taught her goes out the window once the coke, liquor and unwashed dick comes out
i'd love to see this gay fail to be entertaining for 3 hours on JRE
alright guys how would other comedians have responded
>oh my wife you know, i miss her alot but my aim is getting better
What an awful humblebrag. "Oh I'm so sad my daughter is going to YALE!"
he's afraid of living in the house alone with his wife
“Hey guys, I’m so rich I bought my daughter a spot in Yale.”
>unfunny
You sure 'bout that?
who's worse?
quite literally and unironically who?
le heckler owner
WHO?
I think he wins by default because I don't want to poke his eyes out since I don't know him.
Definitely this fag. Kreisher stinks but I detest smugness more than anything else.
red-headed and gnomish, this dude is like the Exodia of AIDS
>strong trail of tears from one eye
>zero tears from the other
>tears start from above eye duct
i've always suspected this guy is at best a creepy fraud and at worst a sociopath wolf in sheeps clothing. just a gut feeling i get from his mannerisms and some things he says / way he speaks. those are fake tears, he used them from a bottle. at least those gay kevin smith crying pics were actual tears; the difference is self-evident.
hes quite literally the most fake guy from all these fake comedian bums
yes but there's some strange element of malevolence to his level and type of fakeness that I don't pick up on from the other obviously fake LA comic types. in my opinion.
he's an alcoholic retard, he probably convinces himself of all kinds of shit that he forgets about later. what seems like sociopathy is him being stupid.
watch the clip where chrisdistefano cries about missing his daughters life. dumb moron starts fucking laughing so hard hes wheezing because thats his reaction to everything, before he realizes "oh fuck, im supposed to cry" so he just lays it on thicker to pretend thats how he cries
>sociopath wolf in sheeps clothing
This describes 100% of professional comedians.
reminder that he made a FULL FUCKING MOVIE from his single and only joke that he has
"Joke"
>DUDE I TOOK OFF MY SHIRT!!!! LMAOOOO!!!
Holy fuck this dude SUCKS
it's a shame that Joe Rogan Podcast episodes have been pulled off of youtube. The "End of the World 2016" live podcast, which was going on while the election votes were being counted, had a great moment between Bill Burr and Burt. Burt, in his typical unfunny retard fashion, took his shirt off to react to something that somebody else said. Somebody else said something, they got attention for it, and Burt had to one-up this person by taking his shirt off for attention. The crowd cheered for Burt, and Bill dissected the audience and Burt in a two-for-one combo by saying "HE TOOK HIS SHIRT OFF, WE LAUGHED". He distilled the entirety of Burts existence to 7 words. Burt looked like he was laughing at what Bill said, but his belly/chest cavity wasn't moving at all - it was 100% fake laughter. Burt was hurt, and that makes me happy. I hope Burt has aggressive stage 4 cancer. Fuck that retard.
Burr is really good at destroying the clowns of comedy like that. Like when he asked Rogan if he really thought of himself as a comedian.
Imagine still watching JRE.
>talks about a 2016 episode
>"still watching"
anon are you stuck in a timeloop
berdsa beaanst bro
furruw berds a beanst.
I only watch bad friends. it's silly and fun. The rest just bitch about woke shit and cancel culture and whatever.
Can someone please explain to me how this guy blew up?
He has literally 1 (ONE) mediocre joke.
>LE MACHINE XDDDD
extreme coattail riding. he brown-noses everyone who can potentially accelerate his career. he's scum.
It's all about who you know. On his own, he would have never made it imo. Being part of that clique seems to be enough to get people to watch his content. Tom Segura in that same timeframe has done much better that EL MACHINEE.
Even Joey Diaz, who I DO like, hasn't really suceeded as a comedian compare to his peers, but he actually has character and hes a great storyteller. Without JRE nobody would know who he is.
Joey Diaz is someone that I like better on the internet. I saw him live once and he was incredibly mediocre.
He probably needs someone to bounce off of like Joe on the podcast
For those who didn't get it, the point of his post was
>#yaleuniversity
That's why it's extremely cringe.
Oh fuck I was going to decorate for Pride month but I missed it. Oh fuck I was going to have all my friends over and put flags up and shit but I just fuckin' missed it. Ahh shit.
which mental illness makes a full grown man take a picture of his tears then post it publicly?
I believe that's called narcissism.
How else will he tell his followers his daughter is going to Yale?
is his daughter hot?
lol what a gay
he should be sad though; he's paying for his daughter to get fucked by chads and taught to be a chud