Snoy is a "game" company liked by turd worlders and homosexuals
Maze runner movies are made for homosexuals
Geoff Keighley is a homosexual
Twitter is for homosexuals and only homosexuals post twitter screencaps on Cinemaphile
OP is the biggest homosexual of all both as a rule and because he combined all the above elements into a single post
Snoy is a "game" company liked by turd worlders and homosexuals
Maze runner movies are made for homosexuals
Geoff Keighley is a homosexual
Twitter is for homosexuals and only homosexuals post twitter screencaps on Cinemaphile
OP is the biggest homosexual of all both as a rule and because he combined all the above elements into a single post
nah that's you
cum guzzling homosexual detected
>NO U
What a nice way of telling everyone you're a seething homosexual chudcel
[...]
we don't sign our posts here
>the Cinemaphile combo absolutely ethers another one
Nintendo's currently the only based console, they really pulled their heads out of their asses right when Sony and Microsoft were starting to stuff their heads right in their own
>Playstation exclusively catering to walking sim basedlennials, most of its market now is 2kboons and Fifaspics, completely alienated weeb and basedgamer base >Xbox literally shitting hot snake turds into its own mouth 24/7, has CODgays and TESissies by the balls now >Nintendo stealing every kino japanese third party from former industry leader Sony while keeping their blue ocean playerbase intact
Nintendo is the only competent and quality one if you're not just playing on PC
Nintendo's Blue Ocean strategy was genuinely ingenious (they're now using Nintendo as a case study in business schools) and their newfound opposition to censoring nip waifu games sets them apart from Sony and Microsoft. Honestly the switch is a knockout system, since they've combined their robust handheld market with their kino first party title development it's been incredible, plus they have more third parties than ever before. Honestly the only real problem is that you can't run the top of the line new games on it, but who really wants to? What is it really missing? The new Fromsoft games, Monster Hunter World, Devil May Cry 5. Aside from that who really cares?
All 3 Maze Runner movies are under 55% on RT and those are the only movies he’s directed
Maze Runner trilogy is kino. Not pozzed or political, just a fun action series with some decent characters and good moments. I doubt this Zelda movie will be, but.
YO LIL LINKY, I'VE BEEN EATING NOTHING BUT COW SHIT AND SQUID GUTS ALL DAY> NOW I'M GONNA PEE IN MY OWN MOUTH AND SPIT THAT RANCID SHIT-PISS STRAIGHT AT YOU! HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES?
YO LIL ZELDIE YA THINK YA A WOMAN HUH GUESS WHAT I GOT RAISED AND SISSIFIED IN AN ALL-FEMALE SOCIETY FOR 30 YEARS OF MY LIFE HOW'S THAT FOR FEMALE EMPOWERMENT
I appreciate that it will be a liveaction attempt instead of an Illumination cartoon for Zelda but the people involved don't inspire me with confidence.
Someone talented wouldn't toe the line. It's like with mcu capeshit. They're basically big-budget tv directors who do whatever the showrunner tells them
Arad is the producer, the director is the guy who did Maze Runner. Arad is a horrendous story teller and he always forced in weird shit into his film adaptations. My excitement for this film fricking plummeted when I saw his name attached. Hopefully Nintendo's deal sees them exert final creative control over the film
>X-Men Last Stand >Morbius >Elektra >Daredevil >Ghost in the Shell >Uncharted >Bratz
For all the good films he produced, all of them manned by people who were talented enough to get through his bullshit, he made a lot of stinkers. If you like his films then that's you, but I'm not expecting anything more than garbage bin tier shit to cash in on the IP.
Why they didn't let Universal do the Zelda movie, I don't know
i think theyd be able to do a lot more with botw tv series live action. the travelling around world, learning about people, races, finding out more about the divine beasts with link and zelda, etc. basically the flashbacks fleshed out. could do season in each area and end series with ganon awakening.
dont think theres any other game that has a story or plot to really work in a movie format. maybe original story i guess. like oot you cant really do time travel back and forth and pulling out the ocarina aint gonna fly in live action. i feel like you cant really capture the adventure part of the game and dungeon exploring in a movie format. tv series/anime fit that 'adventure of the week' type of plots the games technically have with going to each dungeon for new adventure every time. i guess you could do oot-lite with 'link as kid, loses in first act, time skip to world destroyed, claim master sword in act 2, beat ganon and save princess act 3' type of plot. hard to cover a lot or feel of the games wtih dungeons, world traversing and exploring though.
>Sony, always remember: You're our b***h >Now be a good little b***h and enjoy the profit we just made you distributing a film that undermines your shitty videogames business
>ugly fat hands >histrionic and over emotive facial expressions >grown man who can't hide or control his sperginess
yup, smells like a 30 year old virgin
They are just slow walking the homosexualry. See: Black folk in totk, trannies in Pokemon, girlboss peach
They are the conservasharts of the video game industry. Expect them to be Sony level homosexuals by 2030.
>Black folk in totk,
Gerudo aren't black >trannies in Pokemon,
I haven't played Pokemon in a decade bu there's an almost 100% chance this is hyperbole >girlboss peach
Mostly played for laughs and she's still dainty and femine. Seethe harder
>still plenty of Black folk in the TotK
Nice way of saying you never played it.
TOTK is the whitest Zelda game ever & the greatest sequel ever created in all of collective human history on Earth. To review this is a hard cope.
7 months ago
Anonymous
*refute
7 months ago
Anonymous
Played it a ton, you must be blind moron. There are tons of Black person npc in the game that did not exist in the BotW.
7 months ago
Anonymous
>t. only watched The Synthetic Incel's review
7 months ago
Anonymous
your the only one here who watches fricking video game reviews lol
7 months ago
Anonymous
Zelda's mom is literally half black from all the telegony courtesy of the gallons of black Black person demon goat sperm in her puss. Gorons are also more diverse for some reason.
7 months ago
Anonymous
Okay, how woke was TOTK? I thought Japan was free of ESG bullshit. What the hell happened?
7 months ago
Anonymous
>I thought Japan was free of ESG bullshit.
Only the smaller companies that don't need Larry Fink's kosher handouts. Big ones like Capcom or Nintendo are fricked and are increasingly more fricked by the day
this looks like the fricking Microsoft avatars
what is this ugly fricking art style?
what the frick happened that went from pic related to that
7 months ago
Anonymous
>be le straight white male anon >le edgy internet autist >le intelligent knows how to use computer >pirate everything >torrent everything >constantly brag about how you're never giving a dime to Big Gaming
You voted with your wallet. They voted with theirs. Why are you now acting SURPRISED and OUTRAGED that big game corps now cater to the genderqueers softboys and and straggly haired soundcloud rap artist muttoids who actually keep them in business?
7 months ago
Anonymous
>schizo homosexual screams at a boogeyman
Fricking have a nice day.
7 months ago
Anonymous
Ah, and so it lashes out in pure rage as the nail is hit on the head.
Don't @ me unless you have a credible argument.
7 months ago
Anonymous
>strawman shit >argument
Again, have a nice day.
7 months ago
Anonymous
You seem upset and unable to articulate a rational response. That's what we call "hitting the nail on the head". I'd accept your concession, but someone as addled and rattled as you has little value anyway.
Have you seen the Mario movie? they have negative balls, the film will follow the marvel blueprint of undercutting every potentially serious scene with a joke.
Zelda has always been extremely dangerous to the mystery cult. Expect hollywood to go above and beyond in defiling it. This film will be extraordinarily demoralizing, worse than anything in recent years.
- nig Kokiris
- nig Hylians
- no saving princess Zelda ever
- Yas qween slay
- Androgynous homosexual propaganda
- Gerudos will have flat monkey nostrils noses instead of pointy noses
- Atheist themes
- Ganondorf will be white and the only cool character
It should be an isekai where a nerdy teenage boy gets sucked into his tv with Zelda on the NES hooked up and gets Link's outfit and weapons and has to save the princess. Same aesthetics and practical effects as Neverending Story and Legend. Kino. $100 trillion box office
So it's a creative decision? Square started dealing in EU crap, including films and novelizations at the height of their sales too. It's still desperate and embarrassing, albeit for different reasons, considering Square has never actually made a video game. Nintendo has at least produced some good material in the 20th century, shame they weren't able to evolve. They just seem incompetent now.
Contentment in producing low quality productions for a low standard-having market is desperate in the form of attention-seeking.
I don't know, maybe they just saw how much money the Mario movie made and are trying to leverage that success into generating even more profit. Not everything has to be some Freudian 4D chess psychobabble shit.
>Not everything has to be some Freudian 4D chess psychobabble shit.
What else would it be? Everything sounds simple when you refuse to question it, including what purpose the monetary success serves.
Depends what the tone of the film is. If it were going for more goofy, lighthearted but with some dramatic undertones like Spirit Tracks then sure, she can do that fine.
Ocarina of Time? Twilight Princess? Frick no.
>What do you guys think?
What do I think??? I LOVE IT. Kids think Zen is rad! How about- how about.. she also is super capable at you know guy stuff like fighting and shooting arrows along with you know being smart and beautiful? We will just throw a line in that she had a bunch of brothers. Gannon should also start off as some high end real-estate developer in Hyrule that hates the poor(especially poor from other countries) and seeks nothing but power then finds the tri-force. Maybe we can get Alec Baldwin and make him blonde? Also for link we need someone kosher so that Finn kid from stranger things outta do it. Oh almost forgot... Seth rogan and Kevin hart get bit parts for comic relief. This should make billions!
>Microsoft tries to make its own multimedia shared universe >Flops tremendously >Instantly forgotten even launching at the height of Aiden Gillen's career
Because that's what we know for certain?
I mean we could get literally anything when it comes to plot, setting, etc.
I doubt even stuff like modern day Zelda is not out of the cards with this one
Go check out Cinemaphile right now. The whole board's bleeding from its collective butthole right now due to their overwhelmingly burning hatred of anything & everything Sony + they're already wishing for Miyamoto to get fired for making that decision to partner with them.
>"~uwu, I can't wait for Link to be a gorgeous young blonde-haired and blue-eyed twink!" >Movie comes out >Disgusting gay pro-trans diversity brownie thing like Justice Smith in Detective Pikachu gets the role >Hook nose israeliteess in charge of hiring picked him specifically to "challenge beauty standards" like in The Witcher >Nintendo WILL allow this
Please please please make Zelda black. That will make sure that this shitty movie fails. Otherwise it might succeed because of all the morons in this world, just look at that one piece garbage
DUDE IMAGINE IF LINK SLEEPS IN THE TEMPLE OF TIME TOO LONG AND WAKES UP IN MODERN NYC AND ALL THE HILARIOUS HIJINKS THAT WOULD ENSUE! IT WOULD BE LIKE ELF EXCEPT BADASS AND WITH SWORDS!! HELL YOU COULD EVEN GET WILL FERRELL TO PLAY LINK AND HAVE JOHN C REILLY AS GANONDORF! WOULDN'T MIND AMY POEHLER AS ZELDA EITHER!
>Miyamoto blessings >"What do you mean? Princess Peach always acted like a modern butthole western woman. This is how we designed her to be from the start. *laughs*"
You need talented people to make something like that, not to mention money. Nintendo is cheap as frick. Look at the state of Pokemon now, as an example. It is total shit. It is easier to just do what Konami and Capcom did. License the IP of their franchise out to western hacks and then soak up the money. Even if it looks like a burning landfill and bombs, nobody is left in the companies who care. They are revolving doors
>There is a tempest in me
Reminder that the Rings of Power writers got this from watching a bunch of LOTR Youtube clips, getting a clip from Elizabeth recommended, and thinking it was a clip of Galadriel.
Would Zelda work as a 100% serious fantasy film like Lord of the Rings? I haven't played any since Ocarina and that didn't exactly have a riveting story.
Honestly another throwaway comedy/fantasy adaptation is just going straight into the trash.
For sure I think so. Most of the whemical shit was just interacting with townsfolk there is enough serious story for a great movie. In many ways it actually lends itself better to movies than LOTR which had too big/complex of a story.
>LOTR which had too big/complex of a story.
Bad guy makes ring, ring is source of his power, heroes must destroy ring. It's pretty straightforward, all the extra stuff is largely unnecessary
>Would Zelda work as a 100% serious fantasy film like Lord of the Rings?
yes of course, and it could be supreme kino, but its not going to happen. just something to dream about as link quips and zelda totally tells ganon off in the movie we’d get
If this movie was made 20 years ago, I'd maybe have had hope for it being good, but there is way too much of a chance it'll be infected with current day shit.
>snoy
>maze runner director
>geoff keighley
>twitter
>OP
So much homosexualry in one post
huh what you mean?
Snoy is a "game" company liked by turd worlders and homosexuals
Maze runner movies are made for homosexuals
Geoff Keighley is a homosexual
Twitter is for homosexuals and only homosexuals post twitter screencaps on Cinemaphile
OP is the biggest homosexual of all both as a rule and because he combined all the above elements into a single post
nah that's you
cum guzzling homosexual detected
we don't sign our posts here
>NO U
What a nice way of telling everyone you're a seething homosexual chudcel
What's wrong with twitter? I make nice supplemental income with twitter by posting them Cinemaphile and reddit
Grow up, moron. Games are not Sony's main business.
fine speech
ok how u know
You tell me.
>the Cinemaphile combo absolutely ethers another one
KWAB
>video game movie
>give a frick
get a life, homosexual
No.
>Nintendo, the soi platform, not the one thing greentexted at all
Megagay.
Nintendo's currently the only based console, they really pulled their heads out of their asses right when Sony and Microsoft were starting to stuff their heads right in their own
Nintendo is tied to the soi meme and you will never change that.
Sony's already doing that with their diverse walking sim meme while Nintendo keeps shitting out based kino gameply for the whole (white) family
>Playstation exclusively catering to walking sim basedlennials, most of its market now is 2kboons and Fifaspics, completely alienated weeb and basedgamer base
>Xbox literally shitting hot snake turds into its own mouth 24/7, has CODgays and TESissies by the balls now
>Nintendo stealing every kino japanese third party from former industry leader Sony while keeping their blue ocean playerbase intact
Nintendo is the only competent and quality one if you're not just playing on PC
What are the people who pused this meme a few years back tied to? Incel communities and far-right extremism? Kek.
Why can't chinese people like this speak English properly?
Nintendo's Blue Ocean strategy was genuinely ingenious (they're now using Nintendo as a case study in business schools) and their newfound opposition to censoring nip waifu games sets them apart from Sony and Microsoft. Honestly the switch is a knockout system, since they've combined their robust handheld market with their kino first party title development it's been incredible, plus they have more third parties than ever before. Honestly the only real problem is that you can't run the top of the line new games on it, but who really wants to? What is it really missing? The new Fromsoft games, Monster Hunter World, Devil May Cry 5. Aside from that who really cares?
I'm thoroughly enjoying the glitchy, poorly voice acted Deus Ex Lite experience of Robocop: Rogue City.
>Avi Arad too
It's like they purposely picked the worst people possible for this movie
>Wes Ball
qrd? will zelda be a boon?
Maze Runner young adult movie series, plus the new Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes movie.
All 3 Maze Runner movies are under 55% on RT and those are the only movies he’s directed
They're not that bad it's just that the source material sucks
>Frick it wes ball
>>Frick it wes ball
>>Wes Ball
Was terrified for a moment because I mistook him for Uwe Boll. I was like wtf, him of people.
Maze Runner trilogy is kino. Not pozzed or political, just a fun action series with some decent characters and good moments. I doubt this Zelda movie will be, but.
It’s YA slop
>live-action
sweet, we can get a cute blonde-haired blue-eyed twink to play Link. Post casting suggestions!
Hunter Schafer already confirmed to play both Zelda and Link.
Chuds lost.
I don't like homosexuals getting something they want, but this would be best, assuming the twink could act.
Hmm is he going to be Japanese? Or some multi-cultural mumbojumbo like One Piece or dare I say, The Witcher?
Walkie
this is clearly a israelite
If thats a israelite then I am a Zionist.
Get a load of this tendie. He thinks Link will be white in the live action movie.
Idris Elba
Joeover is a forced meme from Trumptards who lost the election
okay how you know?
nah it's a reference to Joe inevitably losing next year
The meme was posted ages ago
Imagine thinking biden will lose when he's been one of the best presidents we've ever had.
Trump won the election, but it was stolen from him.
Nah, it's just a continuation of the "it's over" meme previously associated with that Trump article.
rent free
I've seen liberals say it when their speedrun is dead or something along those lines. It's just a funny phrase.
Thought it was a spin off of the it's ogre shrek meme.
i won't watch it, it doesn't exist
The fricking israelite that produced the Venom movies is involved with this movie, it's so fricking over.
FRICK
they're better than mcu slop
every film he's produced has soul
Amen. MCU Spidey is hot garbage. Surprised everyone prefers those over the snoy films which actually have soul and practical effects.
>maze runner
yuck
YO LIL LINKY, I JUST RUBBED MY SHIT ALL OVER THE TRIFORCE, DON’T YOU LOOK STUPID HOSS
YO LIL LINKY, I'VE BEEN EATING NOTHING BUT COW SHIT AND SQUID GUTS ALL DAY> NOW I'M GONNA PEE IN MY OWN MOUTH AND SPIT THAT RANCID SHIT-PISS STRAIGHT AT YOU! HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES?
YO LIL ZELDIE YA THINK YA A WOMAN HUH GUESS WHAT I GOT RAISED AND SISSIFIED IN AN ALL-FEMALE SOCIETY FOR 30 YEARS OF MY LIFE HOW'S THAT FOR FEMALE EMPOWERMENT
ron perlman is not really a bad choice at all
>ron perlman is not really a bad choice at all
Despite the shit he posts/believes in I've always like him as an actor.
Danny devito as navi
shame the chance has passed
>HEY! LISTEN!
Yeah there goes the one casting option that would compel me to watch.
You know it's going to happen.
She looks like my gf who I had afternoon sex with just now
Actual decent choice for Gannon about 15 years ago.
He's getting a bit old for action roles now though.
Yikes…
Emma is a better Zelda
this, she should play zelda
My dick could not handle it.
God I want to kiss her
Here's your Zelda
YOU KIDS WOULDNT LAST A DAY IN THE SKARCH
>Aidan Gillen as Ganon
>Kaya Scodelario as Zelda
>Thomas Brodie-Sangster as Link
Kino or bino?
I can dig it
>Link will be BLACK
>Zelda will be WHITE AND BLONDE AND BLUE-EYED
Will the be AGUAMENTUS?
I appreciate that it will be a liveaction attempt instead of an Illumination cartoon for Zelda but the people involved don't inspire me with confidence.
I don't now no smash movie
name one thing a live action zelda could do better than an animated equivalent besides "it's cheaper"
>name one thing a live action zelda could do better than an animated equivalent
Shove miscast diversity in the face of the fanbase?
HUNTER SCHAEFER AS ZELDA
ELLIOT PAGE AS LINK
Nah they'll made Zelda a girl
Then they would have to make Link a girl too so Eliot is out too.
I would genuinely fly to Japan, hunt down Miyamoto, and then kick him in the nuts if he were to allow something like this to happen
The only role zipperbreasts can play is teenage boys so you may be onto something.
Why are they so hellbent on making everything live action? Fricking hell
Bottom line is cheaper than with animation, even when taking shortcuts with CG
>Avi Arad
FROM THE PRODUCER OF MORBIUS
Why the frick can’t they just hire somebody talented
There’s plenty of people who would love to do the job
Someone talented wouldn't toe the line. It's like with mcu capeshit. They're basically big-budget tv directors who do whatever the showrunner tells them
Arad is the producer, the director is the guy who did Maze Runner. Arad is a horrendous story teller and he always forced in weird shit into his film adaptations. My excitement for this film fricking plummeted when I saw his name attached. Hopefully Nintendo's deal sees them exert final creative control over the film
Im just going off of his wikipedia but in my opinion he was the executive producer for the best cape shit movies that were ever made.
>X-Men Last Stand
>Morbius
>Elektra
>Daredevil
>Ghost in the Shell
>Uncharted
>Bratz
For all the good films he produced, all of them manned by people who were talented enough to get through his bullshit, he made a lot of stinkers. If you like his films then that's you, but I'm not expecting anything more than garbage bin tier shit to cash in on the IP.
Why they didn't let Universal do the Zelda movie, I don't know
>live-action
>Wes Ball
Jesus fricking christ. Okay...
Sure. They wouldn't do it unless they had a great idea I'm sure
>They wouldn't do it unless they had a great idea I'm sure
>live action
i think theyd be able to do a lot more with botw tv series live action. the travelling around world, learning about people, races, finding out more about the divine beasts with link and zelda, etc. basically the flashbacks fleshed out. could do season in each area and end series with ganon awakening.
dont think theres any other game that has a story or plot to really work in a movie format. maybe original story i guess. like oot you cant really do time travel back and forth and pulling out the ocarina aint gonna fly in live action. i feel like you cant really capture the adventure part of the game and dungeon exploring in a movie format. tv series/anime fit that 'adventure of the week' type of plots the games technically have with going to each dungeon for new adventure every time. i guess you could do oot-lite with 'link as kid, loses in first act, time skip to world destroyed, claim master sword in act 2, beat ganon and save princess act 3' type of plot. hard to cover a lot or feel of the games wtih dungeons, world traversing and exploring though.
>letting you biggest competitor distribute your movie
>Sony, always remember: You're our b***h
>Now be a good little b***h and enjoy the profit we just made you distributing a film that undermines your shitty videogames business
japanese distributor. dont underestimate xenophonbia and nepotism in japan.
Sony Pictures/Music=/=PlayStation
Bet you don't know Sony Music is responsible for the Mother OST as well
>ugly fat hands
>histrionic and over emotive facial expressions
>grown man who can't hide or control his sperginess
yup, smells like a 30 year old virgin
>not knowing who AVGN is
where the frick have you been?
>grown man who can't hide or control his sperginess
>this homie just used utube for the first time
>nintendo does't forget they have the high ground now
Midna will be in it as a 7 foot Black.
>Sony
Black Link and troony Zelda
Nintendo doesn't stand for such homosexualry
They are just slow walking the homosexualry. See: Black folk in totk, trannies in Pokemon, girlboss peach
They are the conservasharts of the video game industry. Expect them to be Sony level homosexuals by 2030.
>Black folk in totk,
Gerudo aren't black
>trannies in Pokemon,
I haven't played Pokemon in a decade bu there's an almost 100% chance this is hyperbole
>girlboss peach
Mostly played for laughs and she's still dainty and femine. Seethe harder
>Gerudo aren't black
He never said they were, still plenty of Black folk in the TotK where there were none in BotW
>still plenty of Black folk in the TotK
Nice way of saying you never played it.
TOTK is the whitest Zelda game ever & the greatest sequel ever created in all of collective human history on Earth. To review this is a hard cope.
*refute
Played it a ton, you must be blind moron. There are tons of Black person npc in the game that did not exist in the BotW.
>t. only watched The Synthetic Incel's review
your the only one here who watches fricking video game reviews lol
Zelda's mom is literally half black from all the telegony courtesy of the gallons of black Black person demon goat sperm in her puss. Gorons are also more diverse for some reason.
Okay, how woke was TOTK? I thought Japan was free of ESG bullshit. What the hell happened?
>I thought Japan was free of ESG bullshit.
Only the smaller companies that don't need Larry Fink's kosher handouts. Big ones like Capcom or Nintendo are fricked and are increasingly more fricked by the day
Shut the frick up moron
There’s a character in Legends: Arceus who is all but confirmed trans. I think he’s even referred to with they/them pronouns in the localization.
100% bullshit.
A woman with fat arms? So they put your mom in the game?
this looks like the fricking Microsoft avatars
what is this ugly fricking art style?
what the frick happened that went from pic related to that
>be le straight white male anon
>le edgy internet autist
>le intelligent knows how to use computer
>pirate everything
>torrent everything
>constantly brag about how you're never giving a dime to Big Gaming
You voted with your wallet. They voted with theirs. Why are you now acting SURPRISED and OUTRAGED that big game corps now cater to the genderqueers softboys and and straggly haired soundcloud rap artist muttoids who actually keep them in business?
>schizo homosexual screams at a boogeyman
Fricking have a nice day.
Ah, and so it lashes out in pure rage as the nail is hit on the head.
Don't @ me unless you have a credible argument.
>strawman shit
>argument
Again, have a nice day.
You seem upset and unable to articulate a rational response. That's what we call "hitting the nail on the head". I'd accept your concession, but someone as addled and rattled as you has little value anyway.
Nintendo is for homosexuals
>Gerudo aren't black
Gorons are.
Let's b***hy girlboss Zelda
Wimp pussy ass Link
if they have any balls they wont let link say one word.
Have you seen the Mario movie? they have negative balls, the film will follow the marvel blueprint of undercutting every potentially serious scene with a joke.
The Mario movie was a fricking masterpiece. Keep seething.
You enjoy having your balls crushed.
Cinemaphile - Television and Video Games
>Avi Arad to produce
Zelda has always been extremely dangerous to the mystery cult. Expect hollywood to go above and beyond in defiling it. This film will be extraordinarily demoralizing, worse than anything in recent years.
They should have hired me I had so many ideas for kino
LMAO
How much do you think all of Cinemaphile is seething right now?
- nig Kokiris
- nig Hylians
- no saving princess Zelda ever
- Yas qween slay
- Androgynous homosexual propaganda
- Gerudos will have flat monkey nostrils noses instead of pointy noses
- Atheist themes
- Ganondorf will be white and the only cool character
How old is Link supposed to be in his final playable form? like 23 or so? I wouldn't want to watch some 17 yo wiseass.
17, and Zelda is 16.
So young. That's going to be problematic.
It should be an isekai where a nerdy teenage boy gets sucked into his tv with Zelda on the NES hooked up and gets Link's outfit and weapons and has to save the princess. Same aesthetics and practical effects as Neverending Story and Legend. Kino. $100 trillion box office
nah thats been done too many times
Finally the SoNintendo alliance we were promised in 1991 materializes!
>any faith in Nintodler films after Mario Bros
Calling it now. Nintendo will be the DC equivalent to the Sega's Marvel film universe.
What shitty pop songs are they going to shoehorn into the shitty soundtrack?
>mfw trying to watch The Super Mario Bros. movie
Shit was absolutely embarrassing, especially coming right off of The Last Wish.
nintendo is obssessed with conan the barbarian soundtrack in zelda game trailers so theres that.
Maze Runner was absolutely terrible.
>live action
either link or zelda will be black
They already made that it's Legend (1985) the inspiration for the original game
Kino is back boys
>Can't make any good games
>Resort to making movies
is Nintendo officially the new Sony? This shit reeks of Squaresoft desperation.
>just announced that Switch sales eclipsed 132 million and that TotK has moved nearly 20 million units in less than a year
Yeah, they're desperate alright.
So it's a creative decision? Square started dealing in EU crap, including films and novelizations at the height of their sales too. It's still desperate and embarrassing, albeit for different reasons, considering Square has never actually made a video game. Nintendo has at least produced some good material in the 20th century, shame they weren't able to evolve. They just seem incompetent now.
Contentment in producing low quality productions for a low standard-having market is desperate in the form of attention-seeking.
I don't know, maybe they just saw how much money the Mario movie made and are trying to leverage that success into generating even more profit. Not everything has to be some Freudian 4D chess psychobabble shit.
>Not everything has to be some Freudian 4D chess psychobabble shit.
What else would it be? Everything sounds simple when you refuse to question it, including what purpose the monetary success serves.
I'd say they're about to become the new Disney more than anything else.
And by that, I don't mean classic Disney, I'm referring to self-destructive, collapsing, post-Bob Iger Disney.
Hear me out here: Zendaya as Zelda
What do you guys think?
Depends what the tone of the film is. If it were going for more goofy, lighthearted but with some dramatic undertones like Spirit Tracks then sure, she can do that fine.
Ocarina of Time? Twilight Princess? Frick no.
>What do you guys think?
What do I think??? I LOVE IT. Kids think Zen is rad! How about- how about.. she also is super capable at you know guy stuff like fighting and shooting arrows along with you know being smart and beautiful? We will just throw a line in that she had a bunch of brothers. Gannon should also start off as some high end real-estate developer in Hyrule that hates the poor(especially poor from other countries) and seeks nothing but power then finds the tri-force. Maybe we can get Alec Baldwin and make him blonde? Also for link we need someone kosher so that Finn kid from stranger things outta do it. Oh almost forgot... Seth rogan and Kevin hart get bit parts for comic relief. This should make billions!
t. Hollywood exec
cast him
Simu Liu
That's racist
Tingle is clearly asian. Just look at his eyes.
He's Hylian.
Asian Hylian
Michael Cera
pee wee herman
kek
Deep Roy
rob schneider
Dwight Schrute
Danny DeVito
bobby lee
Warwick Davis
Filthy Frank
OW MY DEKU NUTS!
The Mario film was shit so I can't see Nintendo doing any other films for a while.
Yeah bro it's only the third highest grossing animated movie of all time. They may as well leave the film industry for good.
>popular things are automatically good
NGMI
LOOKS LIKE SKARCHPOSTING'S BACK ON THE MENU, BOYS
Nintendo has been compromised
WELCOME TO THE HYRULE
>Microsoft tries to make its own multimedia shared universe
>Flops tremendously
>Instantly forgotten even launching at the height of Aiden Gillen's career
>YOU WOULDN'T LAST ONE DAY IN GARAAADO
lmfao
I hope it's based on Twilight Princess, the best Zelda game.
Zelda is queen frick off
I'd only want live action Twilight Princess as a Jim Henson Creature Shop joint. CGI would be a waste of the game's Froud-esque art direction.
Cast the girltwink from Euphoria as Zelda or we riot
he can play shiek
>no ones actually discussing potential plot points or writing
>its just freaking out about the director/producer
Because they are terrible picks and remove any hope I had for a good flick
>Zelda
>Plot
Because that's what we know for certain?
I mean we could get literally anything when it comes to plot, setting, etc.
I doubt even stuff like modern day Zelda is not out of the cards with this one
>guys, why is no one talking out of their ass about stuff we know nothing about yet
minecraft yourself in real life, homosexual
Go check out Cinemaphile right now. The whole board's bleeding from its collective butthole right now due to their overwhelmingly burning hatred of anything & everything Sony + they're already wishing for Miyamoto to get fired for making that decision to partner with them.
The First one should have been animated by ghibli then go live action, this is a failure
honestly doesnt sound half bad
but lets see what happens
>Sony working for Nintendo
>"~uwu, I can't wait for Link to be a gorgeous young blonde-haired and blue-eyed twink!"
>Movie comes out
>Disgusting gay pro-trans diversity brownie thing like Justice Smith in Detective Pikachu gets the role
>Hook nose israeliteess in charge of hiring picked him specifically to "challenge beauty standards" like in The Witcher
>Nintendo WILL allow this
It's over before it even began
Please please please make Zelda black. That will make sure that this shitty movie fails. Otherwise it might succeed because of all the morons in this world, just look at that one piece garbage
DUDE IMAGINE IF LINK SLEEPS IN THE TEMPLE OF TIME TOO LONG AND WAKES UP IN MODERN NYC AND ALL THE HILARIOUS HIJINKS THAT WOULD ENSUE! IT WOULD BE LIKE ELF EXCEPT BADASS AND WITH SWORDS!! HELL YOU COULD EVEN GET WILL FERRELL TO PLAY LINK AND HAVE JOHN C REILLY AS GANONDORF! WOULDN'T MIND AMY POEHLER AS ZELDA EITHER!
I could've sworn the LOZ animated movie was already in pre-production at Illumination. Did that deal fall through already?
Never was a thing. Just a rumor.
>Koroks are the worst NPC Nintendo ever created and you know they will be forced diversity in the Zelda film
I like them
Idris Elba would unironically be a good Ganondorf
I want to see him lose the tennis match in live action
Can't wait to see Zelda save link if they don't make him black.
Good. I can't stand Zelda s oybugs
I hope they frontload this movie with lots of Black folk alongside Miyamoto blessings.
>Miyamoto blessings
>"What do you mean? Princess Peach always acted like a modern butthole western woman. This is how we designed her to be from the start. *laughs*"
I think he's just old & doesn't give a frick anymore tbh.
Taylor Swift should play Zelda. That would be based
i want to see taylor swift naked lol just a random thought
So Brie Larson is 100% playing Samus
>Live Action
Its so over. It should have been cel animation like Princess Mononoke
You need talented people to make something like that, not to mention money. Nintendo is cheap as frick. Look at the state of Pokemon now, as an example. It is total shit. It is easier to just do what Konami and Capcom did. License the IP of their franchise out to western hacks and then soak up the money. Even if it looks like a burning landfill and bombs, nobody is left in the companies who care. They are revolving doors
Blame Gamefreak for killing Pokemon.
>14hrs of this followed by a short after credits scene of the director winking
Triforce Of Power
Amazon Prime
Winter 2025
Zelda!
Link has been race swapped since 1987 you fricking morons.
K I N O
Holy frick
WOULD
The Legend Of Zelda: Link's First Gang Bang
A Blacked.com Exclusive
2026
look at that cuck just watching in the back
>Zelda: There is a tempest in me!!!!
morf posters will go nuts
have a nice day
it will be cringe because it's live action, don't cope about it. I'm just giving an example of the potential cringe.
>There is a tempest in me
Reminder that the Rings of Power writers got this from watching a bunch of LOTR Youtube clips, getting a clip from Elizabeth recommended, and thinking it was a clip of Galadriel.
Did Shiggy watch Barbie?
Jack Black as Tingle.
>Avi Arad
OH MY FRICKING GOD SOMEBODY KILL THAT MOTHERFRICKER ALREADY
take the red potion
I wonder if Barbie surpassing Mario's box office is what made them decide to make it live action.
Actually I think it was the success of the One Piece live action show
If that was the case then they would have made it a show instead.
Nah, you can definitely condense the plot of any given Zelda game into a 90-minute film
Wes Ball? i thought it was avi arad
this is probably fake and gay
avi is production company
Wes Ball is directing
>Satanic
This is your brain on The Synthetic Man.
And he was right to call out the demonic israelite.
Aight white bwoi, sit tight and I'mma be savin you right quick. You better eat a mean pussy tho.
Yes ma’am
I found my new fetish for the week. I'll be perfecting this for days.
You can create anything with AI and you are creating obese black women. You are mentally ill.
Yeah it's pretty great.
Make a white one
Absolutely not. This is *my* fetish, anon. I will however make some that aren't totally obese.
How many black israeli lesbians in it? I don't want to see an offensive movie
what if its kino?
amazing you didn't even read the image. nintendo mocks gays.
Should be alttp based and resemble clash of the titans 81
nobody cares about filmslop. not video games.
Way to kill my hype
Built to play Link.
>let your biggest competitor use your second biggest IP
Wdhmbt?
Nintendo respects the PlayStation. This collaboration is meant to be a frick you to Microsoft and in particular Phil Spencer over his leaked emails.
DAMN twilight princess looks like that?
Lauren Phillips right?
Should’ve gotten Snyder and Terrio. If anybody knows how to do an arthurian epic with a silent protagonist it’s those two. 4 hours of it at that.
This has the potential to be the greatest kino of all time. (it will be gay though)
lol at how the AI makes link a literal fricking toddler half the time. It does look incredibly based though
WHY
WHY GOD WHY
Link is seriously going to be trans? I hate this planet
Would Zelda work as a 100% serious fantasy film like Lord of the Rings? I haven't played any since Ocarina and that didn't exactly have a riveting story.
Honestly another throwaway comedy/fantasy adaptation is just going straight into the trash.
For sure I think so. Most of the whemical shit was just interacting with townsfolk there is enough serious story for a great movie. In many ways it actually lends itself better to movies than LOTR which had too big/complex of a story.
>LOTR which had too big/complex of a story.
Bad guy makes ring, ring is source of his power, heroes must destroy ring. It's pretty straightforward, all the extra stuff is largely unnecessary
>Would Zelda work as a 100% serious fantasy film like Lord of the Rings?
yes of course, and it could be supreme kino, but its not going to happen. just something to dream about as link quips and zelda totally tells ganon off in the movie we’d get
>Maze Runner
LOOKS LIKE SKARCHPOSTING IS BACK ON THE MENU BOYS
you merely adopted skarchposting. I was born into it
This is literally perfect, why isn't he cast yet?
Unironically, he's too old
Too old. Too white. Too male.
Just a reminder that here's the live-action Zelda we WON'T get.
Damn, this actually looks like a great and believable take on a live-action Link.
Too bad it's just AI art.
I got the blue armor, your shit is done
What the frick was he thinking, /tv?
he's still mad no one liked his masterpiece twilight princess and is lashing out
If this movie was made 20 years ago, I'd maybe have had hope for it being good, but there is way too much of a chance it'll be infected with current day shit.
Who the frick are the people that keep spamming that troony on this board?
He doesn't even remotely pass.
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Go around, go around, go around... What? It's going way too fast! -Windmill man
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Yeah I'm not watching this garbage. About 90% chance it's going to be same old recycled woke crap we've seen before.
There is only one Zelda movie and it came out in 1985 and has nothing to do with Zelda, but it's as close as you're going to get.