itt we write James Gunn’s upcoming “Superman: Legacy” one post at a time
I’ll start…:
FROM THE HORRIFYINGLY BEAUTIFUL MIND OF JAMES GUNN, THIS IS: SUPERMAN LEGACY
(Opening credits)
Film begins-
itt we write James Gunns upcoming Superman: Legacy one post at a time. Ill start:
Baskin
Roberts
Looking out on the city
interior
>toilet flushes
Clark Kent exits toilet
-Wide pan view-
exterior
Inspired by All Star Superman and Superman For All Seasons and he just made Guardians 3? Yeah this movie is gonna make me cry like a b***h
I’m trans btw
we can tell
>toilet flushes
Lex Luthor exits toilet
Jimmy Olsen enters toilet
>toilet flushes
Krypto pisses on Lex Luthor’s shoes
*5 minute interlude with the text "white people bad" appearing on-screen
-fish eye lens of scene-
>Superman hovering and obscured by a lens flare
>young boy on the ground reaching out to superman
>superman reaches out with..
LE BLACK MAN HAND
>Superman screams out in horror and laser the dirty Black person
“White lives matter”
>scene fades into the next scene
>camera slowly zooms into Clark Kent face as a lens fare is on his forehead
>cut to Lex Luthor, sitting on a toilet, alearly in pain
*fart noise*
>camera starts violently shaking
Is a quake
Brainiac comes out of the ground in downtown metropolis in a drill machine
>cut to Martha Kent entering a skate park
>a group of kids start laughing at her
>Martha begins to rap faster than Eminem
>What'dya think of my new DIGS??!
>scene wipe to transition into the next one
>10 minutes long sex scene where lex luthor gets raped by a dolphin with laser eyes in his bathtub
>Brainiac begins killing civilians with his Ice Ray
>"Iced to meet you"
>cut to Lex Luthor, still on the toilet
>*comically long fart noise*
>Lex being raped by a dolphin was just a constipation-trauma induced hallucination… or was it?
>Superman throws toilet paper roll into his stall
>Lex hastily grabs the roll and wipes himself
>screams in pain
>realises it's only two-ply
>SUPERMANNNNNN!!!
I SEE FRICKING SPOOKY TOOTH SAMBO SHUCKIN AND JIVIN Black person TAR BABY. BETTER LYNCH IT - Superman
>cut to Daily Planet interior
>Perry White is using the janitor closet to film videos for his onlyfans
>daily wire exteror
bo
>camera pans across the street onto LexCorp exterior
>*extremely long and loud fart sound reverbs through the air*
>a dog covers it's nose with it's paws
>Superman smells the fart with his super-smell
>Superman breaks into a sweat, falls to the ground and clutches his chest, struggling
>it’s kryptonite-infused
>Lex ate beans and eggs laced with powdered kryptonite!
>Lois Lane walks out of the Daily Planet
*suddenly, there is a dance-off*
*Grandama starts break-dancing*