Kingdom of Heaven

Wait, the Crusaders are the bad guys?

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    yeah
    >killed a bunch of israelites in the rhine for no reason
    >killed basically any christian who wasn't catholic

    the crusades wasn't "some noble quest to defend the holy land", it was the catholic church wanting to expand their influence

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      And the problem with this is...?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous
      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Catholics are the naggers of whites and christians, they never accomplished anything of note and have always been abrasive cunts

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Catholicism IS Christianity

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >he thinks a private equity company who's ceo title means "god on earth" is christianity
            lol. lmao even.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >he thinks his defamation means anything in the face of the church God himself established

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >he's confusing catholics with mormons
                lol. lmao even.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                stay mad

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                i accept your concession

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Thank you for acknowledging that the Catholic Church is the one established by God, and thank you for denouncing mormonism and all its evils.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                i look forward to laughing at you from heaven as peter turns you away for being an idolitor

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Said a great number of heretics now burning in hell, I know.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                how would you know unless you came from hell, heathen?
                >You shall not make for yourself an idol or a likeness of anything in the heavens above or on the earth below or in the waters beneath the earth
                and yet you make idols of mary and offer her your prayers. begone from this place foul spawn of satan

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >how would you know unless you came from hell, heathen?
                I would know because these things, such as mormonism, are condemned by the church of God on earth. Thus, in the same way I know that all the saints are in Heaven, I know which things may condemn me to hell.
                >idolatry
                this cope is eons old and wasn't true then or now. It is eisegesis, not true exegesis.
                >A graven thing, nor the likeness of any thing All such images or likenesses, are forbidden by this commandment, as are made to be adored and served; according to that which immediately follows, thou shalt not adore them, nor serve them. That is, all such as are designed for idols or image gods, or are worshipped with divine honour. But otherwise images, pictures, or representations, even in the house of God, and in the very sanctuary, so far from being forbidden are expressly authorized by the word of God. See Exodus xxv. 15; chap. xxxviii. 7; Numbers xxi. 8, 9; 1 Chronicles xxviii. 18, 19; 2 Chronicles iii. 10. (Challoner)

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                ten commandment > some exception clause pencilled in by a satanic cult

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >trips confirm god hates catholics

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >the statement of the church of God on the very text you only know about because we compiled it into the vulgate >>> your personal feelings on the matter

                >trips confirm god hates catholics

                >ur an idol worshipper
                >these magic numbers r proof of my point btw 🙂
                lol

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >magic numbers
                if you weren't such a godless heathen you'd know that god works in mysterious ways. you are going to spent eternity in hell, but keep on blaspheming like this and surely you'll roast on only the hottest flames of hell fire. but i forgive you and ask you repent for your sins. seek forgiveness from the lord before it is too late to save your soul.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >if you weren't such a heathen you'd be superstitious like me

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                get thee behind me satan

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >he says after taking le magic numbers as a sign from God rather than the exegesis of the church that God himself created for your sake

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons too; you cannot have a part in both the Lord’s table and the table of demons.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                You're completely right. That's why I don't pretend to believe in God while in actuality publicly confessing to believing in magic repeating digits.
                The only thing you have are your personal platitudes which you repeat to yourself, rather than the teachings of teachers who were given their power to teach, rule, and sanctify by God.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I also forgive you. And what I have forgiven, if there was anything to forgive, I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes.
                >go and seek the light friend and peace be with you

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Jesus Christ only established one church, my friend...

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Go attempt to take part in any random catholic communion (even as a christian) you'd be denied such grace. I'm glad jesus didn't act or think in such ways to the thief on the cross otherwise it'd destroy all tenants of it's religion.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                mormons are weird but based

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It wasn't to spread the influence of God but the politics of man masquerading as the messengers of God.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It depends on which one you're talking about doofus. Also why does everyone like to bring this shit up constantly and never mentions Islamic conquest and taking euros and others as slaves and even eunuchs. Seems awfully israelitey to me

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        wasn't that like 300 years earlier?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Starting from Muhammad's death until very recently actually. Even the US had to send ships to stop them taking slaves and fucking shit up. Just odd how history is taught so one sided, must be because Ghislaine Maxwells dad merged with McGraw Hill and wrote all our history books, what a weird coincidence eh?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            i meant in reference to the film's story

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        because that's the "islamic golden age" while Europe was suffering under the "christian dark age"

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          i meant in reference to the film's story

          Lol yeah thats another example of the one-sidedness. If I'm not mistaken that term was coined by israelites and isn't taken seriously by anyone who's familiar with European history. Despite all that I still like the movie.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        islamists have been committing atrocities for the entire history of their existence, white christians are held to a higher standard.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >white christians are held to a higher standard.
          well they were serving god and fighting the forces of evil, what other higher cause is there?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Cute way of saying cucked.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >for no reason

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >killed a bunch of israelites
        >for no reason
        nagger please

        >for no reason

        qrd?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >expecting someone on Cinemaphile to summerize 4000+ years of history into one post
          read a book nagger

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >killed a bunch of israelites
      >for no reason
      nagger please

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >for no reason

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Thoughts on jihad?
      To whom does Jerusalem belong?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >To whom does Jerusalem belong?
        the bones of those it stands on

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        it belongs to me

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >killed a bunch of israelites in the rhine for no reason
      Based.

      >killed basically any christian who wasn't catholic
      Based.

      The more dead Abrahamists, the better.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >killed a bunch of israelites in the rhine for no reason
      "A israelite will always tell you WHAT happened to him but never WHY."
      -ancient proverb from multiple cultures throughout human history

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Hardly, the first crusade was absolutely necessary and was a justified defense against an existential threat to Christendom and Europe as a whole. The past couple centuries at that point Islam had been encroaching further and further into Europe beyond modern day turkey and had even invaded lower Spain. Even with their dominance in the area Islamists did nothing to make the greater Mediterranean sea safe to travel making commerce in Europe suffer. They got what was coming to them.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >for no reason

      >killed a bunch of israelites
      >for no reason
      nagger please

      >for no reason

      FPBP.

      Kingdom of Heaven sucked because Orlando Bloom was a major miscast. A 5'5" twink cannot be a Medieval sword-wielding Knight. Just no way.

      They should not have killed off that diverse motley crew so soon. They were intriguing.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The point of the film is that they're all the bad guys, fighting pointless wars over the same shitty land because of "faith", and it will never end.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The Muslims are painted pretty well, and they don't even touch on the israelites

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I wouldn't call Saladdin being essentially a grifter "painted pretty well"

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Saladin was pretty based there's a reason he remained the most highly respected muslim in europe up to this day.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      except the Christians are objectively the good guys

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It’s just anti Christina propaganda

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    dogshit movie honestly
    not only anticatholic but the whole thing is a poorly directed nothingburger
    though that would describe almost every ridley scott movie now :

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Nah, it's kino.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >no counterarguments
        lol cope

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >didn't make an argument in the first place
          kek seethe

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I actually did you just can't read since you're not white.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >it's shit
              >it's a nothingburger
              sorry, pajeet, those aren't arguments

              kek cope

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >nonwhite projecting
                lmfao seethe

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >nonwhite projecting
                I know you are, you already conceded that you made no argument when it was pointed out, Raj
                lol, lmao even

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >N-NO I
                holy cope

                >dogshit movie honestly
                Not an argument. It's a good movie honestly.
                >not only anticatholic but the whole thing is a poorly directed nothingburger
                Catholics are shit-tier, but a lot happens in the film meaning it's not a nothingburger. You were filtered.
                >though that would describe almost every ridley scott movie now :
                Not an argument, you've been filtered hard.

                Why can't non-whites understand films by whites?

                >all this projection
                >"muh filtered"
                lol I don't speak monkey, try rewording it when you speak to your white master. got that, boy?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >seething this hard
                top kek

                >Another Kingdom of Heaven thread
                This is the fourth one I've seen since I started keeping track yesterday.
                Anyway, I watched both of these documentaries off of youtube.

                The Kings & Generals one is better produced, but I thought it was weird when he started talking about israelites and shit for like half an hour out of nowhere. The Real Crusades History guy is nicer in my opinion, despite leaving out all the battle info since he's just using royalty free stuff mostly. He paints the Crusaders in a relatively positive light overall, compared to the K&G one. Also he says CruSAYYYD which I think is funny. Has anyone else seen a weird uptick in Crusader media references even prior to this whole lame Gaza stuff, or am I the weird one?

                >he started talking about israelites and shit for like half an hour out of nowhere
                what was the context? their roles in the crusades? their victimhood?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                How can non-whites ([...]) be filtered by this?

                >still seething cause I shit on their naggermonkey version of history
                lmfao

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >can’t cope with non having an argument
                chimping out is in character for your type kek

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I've literally got you and your friend chimping out over my based white power assessment of this shitty movie?
                If it was wrong why did you reply both reply with so much seethe?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                nagger gonna nig

                I've literally got you and your friend chimping out over my based white power assessment of this shitty movie?
                If it was wrong why did you reply both reply with so much seethe?

                lmao blue eyed pepe won’t give you blue eyes, raj

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                All out of non-arguments, boy?
                lmfao
                meanwhile Olivier shits on Scott

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >no counter arguments
                lol

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                You'd have to present a counter-argument to begin with, boy

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I actually did you just can't read since you're not white.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                based

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Golden shutdown.

                Non-whites can’t understand mockery any more than they can arguments or movies lmao

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I already said that line.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Golden shutdown.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                it’s seething now lmao

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Damn straight, Satan.

                it's pure kino

                The only shortcoming was not actually portraying the battle at Hattin. I wanted to see the last charges of the Templar on screen.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                An offshoot of the People's Crusade where a bunch of Germs said 'eh, killing israelites that live nearby is good enough & cheaper. They killed Jesus + they're annoying, so they deserve it.' more or less.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Wacky Germans

                European history is controversial for non-whites.

                Tends to make them angry just seeing it.

                >Tends to make them angry just seeing it.
                Still seething that we brought them civilisation.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >dogshit movie honestly
      Not an argument. It's a good movie honestly.
      >not only anticatholic but the whole thing is a poorly directed nothingburger
      Catholics are shit-tier, but a lot happens in the film meaning it's not a nothingburger. You were filtered.
      >though that would describe almost every ridley scott movie now :
      Not an argument, you've been filtered hard.

      Why can't non-whites understand films by whites?

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    This movie is ahistorical garbage. Directors cut too.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >ahistorical
      how?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        For starters Balian was almost 50 and was born in the holy land. He also didn’t romance Sybilla, he was married to her mom (or step mom, can’t rememeber). Saladin didn’t free every Christian, he only freed those who could afford ransom, and the rest were enslaved. And lastly Guy and Raynaud weren’t a rogue subverting King Baldwin. They were probably all in cahoots. The most accurate part was the Crusaders losing at Hattin due to overextending themselves. The two armies were more evenly matched despite the difference in size (~15k Christians vs. ~20k Muslims - not 200k like in the movie). When Lionheart crusaded a few years later he easily won every battle and retook basically all the coastal cities. Only reason he didn’t retake the city of Jerusalem was because he didn’t want to make the same mistake and overextend himself as it would have been an absolute bloodbath and coin flip sieging Jerusalem.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Raynaud
          I just watched a documentary and Raynaud was probably the staunchest ally of Baldwin.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Inshallah.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Not when God wills it.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >how do you respond without sounding mad?

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Yes, haven't you played assassin's creed?

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      How can non-whites (

      >N-NO I
      holy cope
      [...]
      >all this projection
      >"muh filtered"
      lol I don't speak monkey, try rewording it when you speak to your white master. got that, boy?

      ) be filtered by this?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        European history is controversial for non-whites.

        Tends to make them angry just seeing it.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >European history is controversial for non-whites.
          >Tends to make them angry just seeing it.

          Non-whites can't even form cohesive arguments about why they don't like it kek

          >can’t cope with non having an argument
          chimping out is in character for your type kek

          this

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Non-whites can't even form cohesive arguments about why they don't like it kek
            I think it's just some pajeet off /misc/ judging from all the filenames being fresh and the desire to be white despite hating whites.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              never met a white person who dislikes KoH

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah, but you've never met a white person at all.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Not on Cinemaphile anyway, y'all are brown as mud and twice as smelly, yeehaw!

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Another Kingdom of Heaven thread
    This is the fourth one I've seen since I started keeping track yesterday.
    Anyway, I watched both of these documentaries off of youtube.

    The Kings & Generals one is better produced, but I thought it was weird when he started talking about israelites and shit for like half an hour out of nowhere. The Real Crusades History guy is nicer in my opinion, despite leaving out all the battle info since he's just using royalty free stuff mostly. He paints the Crusaders in a relatively positive light overall, compared to the K&G one. Also he says CruSAYYYD which I think is funny. Has anyone else seen a weird uptick in Crusader media references even prior to this whole lame Gaza stuff, or am I the weird one?

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ah sweet another Christ LARPer seething thread

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >the DC is good!
    why did Cinemaphile lie to me

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      What movie do you think is good, and then what movie did you think the DC of KoH would live up to from how good people said it was? I think it's good, but I'd like to hear what you have to say.

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Kingdom of Heaven is one of the best films of the last 20 years, definitely one of Ridley Scott’s best.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      it's pure kino

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It was a different time.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Muslims
    >Launch Jihad after Jihad against Europe with the hopes of turning the land Islamic.
    >It was tradition for every new Muslim King to declare Jihad and wage war.
    >Engage in slave trade of not only blacks but white Christians.
    >This got so bad that living near the coast was considered a death sentence.
    >Muslims keep fucking around, enslaving and conquering Christian lands, slaughtering everyone who stood against them.
    Christians
    >Christian Kingdoms finally are fed up and unite to drive the invaders back and to take Jerusalem as payback.
    Muslims
    >"EVIL CRUSADERS JUST WANT TO SLAUGHTER US FOR NO REASON! WE DID NOTHING WRONG! ISLAM IS A RELIGION OF PEACE! CHRISTIANS ARE BLOOD THIRSTY MONSTERS!"

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >When I was in my sixteenth Kingdom of Heaven thread, I made a great shitpost. I felt in that moment I would live to see a hundred threads. Now I know I shall not see thirty. None of us know our end, really, or what anon will guide us there. A janny may warn a man, a mod may ban an anon, but that anon can also move himself, and only then does that anon truly begin his own game. Remember that howsoever you are banned or by whom, your soul is in your keeping alone, even though those who presume to play you be jannies or men of power. When you stand before God, you cannot say, "I was filtered by Kingdom of Heaven," or that the christians were le bad guys. This will not suffice. Remember that.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >When you stand before God, you cannot say, "I was filtered by Kingdom of Heaven,"

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >but that anon can also turn airplane mode on and off, and only then does that anon truly begin his own game

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Golden shutdown.

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    kingdom of heaven is a movie made for circumcised people

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Varangian Guard, whatever happened there?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Politicians eventually made them into a ceremonial role, then they fell with the Byzantine empire when the ottomans took constantinople.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Heavy Infantry started to get countered as calvary got better.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          replaced by cataphracts?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            No. Those were two separate contingents of the military. They just died out, anon. A lot of them just got old, and over time they were there to hang out mostly.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Were they replaced by anything or just kept at home to guard the emperor?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Nothing replaced them.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Normans were too strong

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The crusaders during the first crusade seem like a bunch of assholes who stumbled their way from Europe to Constantinople and then into Jerusalem and in spite of everything they manage to do it
    I'd be cool to have a film about it

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      A current year crusades film would just be junk.

      KoH caused enough kvetching as it is.

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >The crusaders during the first crusade seem like a bunch of assholes
    >Damn straight, Satan.

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    honestly the saracens were the best part of the film

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Only because they were not portrayed accurate to history. The movie actually made both Crusaders and Saracens much more noble than they were in reality, but were especially kind to the Saracens. Probably the most laughable thing about this movie is the way Saladin dealt with the Christians in Jerusalem. In reality he had intended to slaughter them all, but was only dissuaded from this when the Crusader who led the defense swore to kill every Muslim in the city and destroy every Mosque before the city fell. So Saladin did spare them... by enslaving over 15,000 men, women, and children.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >the Crusader who led the defense swore to kill every Muslim in the city and destroy every Mosque before the city fell. So Saladin did spare them... by enslaving over 15,000 men, women, and children.
        Seems based of Saladin.

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The only way to establish peace between the israelites and Palestinians is to reestablish the Kingdom of Jerusalem.
    Crusade when?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      What are you, 13 years old 10 years ago?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      impossible with the current israeli pope

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  28. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  29. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    > Crusaders are the bad guys

    No

  30. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Redpill me on King John. Was he really that terrible?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Not many king's of England have been named John hence since.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Redpill me on King John. Was he really that terrible?

      He's probably a good king knowing how history has been ~~*written*~~ so far.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      With sound?

  31. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Edward Norton carried the shit out of this movie. The first half would be boring shit without him

  32. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    191668706
    Poor b8

  33. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You cant get a kino crusade flick without that era's goyslop. Back then they were happy with just mocking or straight up shitting on christians while uplifting poc.
    Pretty sure if created now we'd have the leader of templar be some brownoid and even more islamic ideas.

  34. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  35. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >steals the show in you’re path
    I can’t find any videos or photos of Norton on set in costume or doing any interviews about this role. Was surprised to see his name in the credit roll

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      He and the Saladin actor were the best part

  36. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Do have any of Saladin riding up to meet Baldwin?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Nope sorry.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          This was a based movie, and made an impression on child me for two reasons.

  37. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Watch Kingdom of Heaven Theatrical version
    >Christianity bad
    >Watch Kingdom of Heaven Director's cut
    >Every religion has dickheads, also Christianity is literally real wtf

  38. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >110F
    >wears full chain mail and 7 layers of clothing
    >metal cap

    yeah right

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      back then men were men and not the weak homosexuals you and your peers are

  39. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >good guys vs bad guys
    when will you grow up?

  40. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Quick, name more medieval kino.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      the northman is my favorite, but yes more please

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Quick, name more medieval kino.

        https://i.imgur.com/8GqLc3Q.jpg

        Wait, the Crusaders are the bad guys?

        ONCE MORE INTO THE BREACH MY FRIENDS!

  41. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I mean the effect that Christianity had on the western world is interesting, but abrahamic religions are ultimately just memes considering Judaism itself which Christianity and Islam are based on is a syncretic religion that borrowed heavily from Egyptian, Canaanite and Sumerian myths.

    El being the father of 60 lesser deities like Ba'al and Yahweh, Mose's covenant code being pretty much Hammurabi's code of law, and Noah's Ark pretty much cribbed from the Epic of Gilgamesh.

    Most of the stories in the bible and talmud were written VERY recently historically speaking, within the last 2000 years, probably compiled by rabbis in Alexandria and borrows from preexisting stories of the ancient middle east.

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