Kino has returned to theaters

Kino has returned to theaters

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  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How is Darth Maul the best character in Star Wars when he's onscreen for like a grand total of 5 minutes and says basically nothing?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You were saying?

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        How is Darth Maul the best character in Star Wars when he's onscreen for like a grand total of 5 minutes and says basically nothing?

        Just good designs. Lucas has an eye for design, but can't write for shit. All the best Star Wars stuff was just based on their designs. The characters all actually suck. Maul and Fett both got ruined as soon as they wrote stories for them.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Jango Fett has amazing lore & has always been cooler than Boba. Bounty Hunter the game for ps2 was one of the best games ever

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Missed a trick with Darth Maul vs Boba Fett happening somehow.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I'm sure they fricked in the clone wars

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          it was going to happen in that Han Solo sequel that never was.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            FRICK! Why not open with that?

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I'm saying "hot, hot HOT AAAAAAAAAA"

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Jobbed.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      A cool design, a cool sword, and being played an excellent stuntman can go a long way.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Pure Kino I love all six movies.

      Apparently he was supposed to be the main villain of a Lucas sequel trilogy. But I can't see him as a threat because he didn't seem that powerful in the force in both EU and canon. He got ragdolled by Sidious and one spotted by Ben Kenobi btw.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I always liked the eerie dissonance between his appearance and his completely normal, even refined voice in TPM.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Darth Maul the best character
      Pure bleddit
      >le scary guy with black/red face paint and horns
      >IS THAT A DOUBLE LIGHT SABER?
      >oh nos he kill muh quigon neeson

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >How is Darth Maul the best character in Star Wars
      He's not, you're just a simpleton.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I never saw appeal of Darth Maul. Never saw his design cool.
      Count Dooku, Jango Fett, General Grievous were much better villains in Prequels

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm watching fall guy instead of this garbage

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Enough with this shit. Noone gives a frick besides 50+ old manchildren

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The film was made for kids who are now adults in their mid 30s, stupid zoomer

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        No, it was made to make nostalgia bucks and sell toys.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          for millennials when they were kids, not 50+ year olds today. 50+ grew up with the originals

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            anyone born before 95 grew up with the originals

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I was born in 89 and I grew up with the originals but they were made for kids older than myself

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                yeah i'm aware kids in the 70s and kids in the 90s were very different, hence the fart jokes in phantom menace. but it still holds that kids born between trilogies grew up watching all the 60s-80s kino and were more influenced by their cultural norms. i was born in 91 and had seen the ot a million times by the time of the initial announcement of the prequels in 96/97 with the special editions, and then only moreso when the films released. if anything i'd say i grew up on the special editions more than i did growing up on that laserdisc set from 93.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I watched the special editions in theater but still continued to watch the original non special editions on VHS my parents had

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                i had taped versions of the originals before the special editions came out, the only reason i discarded them was so i didn't have to fast forward through the commercials

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah our new hope VHS (just called star wars at the time) got busted up so I had to supplement our trilogy with a recorded one

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I "grew up around" the OT, I watched part of them on TV and was aware of its huge popularity, but I didn't exist when everyone was guessing how the trilogy would end. The PT was my generation's Star Wars, love them or hate them

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This was specifically designed to make the entire millennial generation addicted to buying plastic garbage and it worked.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        None of the designs in episode one make cool toys though. Everything looks like shit except the ship with the busted hyperdrive.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          And yet it catapulted star wars into being one of the franchises with the highest global toy sales.

          Millennials are fricked in the head.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Millennials are fricked in the head.
            Or maybe you are.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >None of the designs in episode one make cool toys though
          True, Darth Maul and his double lightsaber were the only thing people talked about and bought toys of. Nobody wanted baby anakin, baby obiwan or some queen woman who changes clothes every scene.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I wanted Naboo starfighter and podracer toys so bad back then

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            > some queen woman who changes clothes every scene.
            Did they try to capitalize on this with a doll? It would be the first time a sci-fi franchise tried it.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              wouldn't*

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >exclusive look at disneyslop
    No one cares. We're here for podracing, Qui-Gon, Watto, droideka, Maul, battle droid invasion kino.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I the last movie I saw in theaters was Episode I in 3D. I had seen it all too many times and the thrill was gone. the amount of chemicals that 9 year old me was exposed to when I saw it in '99 ruined me for life. ATOC was good, but it didn't reach that level. by the time ROTS rolled out I was a jaded man. they want to pay $30 to see it with a bunch Yidsney aids sprinkled on it then frick em.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >now with even more added CGI slop
    nah thanks I still have the prequels on my movie HDD but apart from the podracing scene, the darth maul scene (which sadly also includes the shitty spaceship battle) and maybe the fight between anakin and obi-wan I'm not planning on re-watching any of this garbage, ever

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I also rewatch multiple scenes from movies I supposedly hate

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        A few good scenes doesn't make 3 movies great. Dual of the Fates is an amazing track though and the podracing stuff is also kino. The rest can still be shit. Because the movies aren't that big in size I just keep them but for example in case of Lucy (2014) I cut out the part with ScarJo where she shoots the guys in the hallway but deleted the rest of the movie.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Awaking destroying the Droid control ship by accident is so cringe. Ugh.

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous
    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      hey now i've been a staunch defender of the last airbender since it came out

      not because i like the movie in particular (it's ok at best) but because i know it triggers atla fans who are homosexuals in the first place

      i also initially didn't care for dune when i first watched it but it grew on me later

      Star Wars was ruined when homosexual lucas made the prequels. There is no refuting this.

      i am refuting this because disney wars exists and automatically elevated the prequels to a higher plane

      This is how comedic relief is supposed to be done though, with a ridiculous character, not the main hero from the previous trilogy.

      the tit milk was the only joke in that movie that actually worked

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >The PT babies need the ST to justify liking their shitty movies

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          i never said the prequels were perfect or without fault, there's plenty of changes i would personally make to them. it's just a simple fact that disney star wars is even worse and by default that puts the prequels on a higher pole position

          Is this the cringe re edited version where Yoda is CGI or is it the actual 1999 version

          i enjoyed the idea of puppet yoda again but they de-aged him way too much for phantom menace, lucas was right to swap out for cgi to keep him more in line with 2 and 3

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >i am refuting this because disney wars exists and automatically elevated the prequels to a higher plane

        Jesus how fricking moronic can you be

        The sequels were bad because the prequels were bad

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          and how moronic can you be that you can't read? the prequels have their problems but the sequels are much worse and by default that makes the prequels better.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >i've been a staunch defender of the last airbender since it came out
        You being moronic since the beginning doesn't make the contrarianism nonsense any better.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          good reading comprehension, way to take that bit out of context, moron.

          The Disney movies are terrible but that doesn't make the prequels better. Making that argument concedes the whole property is shitty/played out and you have to gage individual movies by internally comparing them to one another.

          Lucas is just a terrible writer who initially lucked out when he kept the story simple and pumped in SFX that could carry the movies on their own.

          i'd like to see you write a six film saga. idk what it is lately but especially in regards to the fallout series i keep seeing morons say how the writing is awful. and yet without any effort i can tell that none of these people have ever attempted to write their own films or shows. now you can make an argument that lucas has more of the paperback novelist typeset about him and that doesn't necessarily translate well to the screenplay format, but that also doesn't really matter when the jolted dialogue still ends up working out and people are quoting it word for word almost 50 years later.
          >Making that argument concedes the whole property is shitty/played out and you have to gage individual movies by internally comparing them to one another.
          george said it himself that star wars was the most expensive low budget film ever made. it's always had an intentional cheap feel to it, what he made up for lacking in budget he provided with story, spectacle and editing. so besides the fact that you clearly have no idea what you're talking about and have a fundamental misunderstanding of the moviemaking process at large, is there anything else you'd like to say before i simply call you a moronic Black person and ignore your further replies?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >good reading comprehension, way to take that bit out of context
            No you, moron. Way to tell on yourself, lol.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >it's meant to feel low budget
            >it has spectacle
            Holy shit you're a moron. I know prequelgays are morons gleefully amused by poorly written pseudo-kids movies but frick. Lol

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              ironic you calling me stupid when you don't even watch movies or research bts

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Ironic you used the word "ironic" incorrectly while trying to insult someone else's intelligence (for not watching enough movies, lol)

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                this is a board about film and television, if you don't partake in the hobby then don't post here, simple as.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Who said anything about not watching movies, homosexual? The problem is you're a prequelgay who misuses terms in an attempt to intellectualize shitty movies that didn't even know who their audience was (besides morons of course).

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >didn't know who their audience was
                >you misuse terms
                lol
                lmao

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Keep crying, homosexual. It's not going to change the fact you've outed yourself as a moron multiple times ITT (i.e. gone over and above being a prequelgay lol)

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Frick you, Episode 1 was always good, while Dune and The Last Airbender were always trash.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's literally the opposite of what you said philistine.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I've been in love with episode 1 since the day I saw it.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This but unironically.
      The main problem with Dune 1984 is that it doesn't make sense.
      Once you watch Dunc and know the basic beats of the plot it becomes way more enjoyable.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      When Episode I came out (and next two as well) I really enjoyed them, while the new Disney fake SW's are just unwatchable.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Episode 1 is the only decent SW movie.
      That's including the OG trilogy.
      Ep2 has the best music.

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Somehow dogshit has returned.

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >kino
    lol

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This is how comedic relief is supposed to be done though, with a ridiculous character, not the main hero from the previous trilogy.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        How tf do you read a man raised as a farmer for most of his life doing the simple task of milking a cow being intended for "comedic relief"?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The alien makes orgasmic sounds and Luke does a disgusted face. Also, he was a moisture farmer, not a livestock one.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I am guilty of this

          We waited about 4 years since the sequels came out to see what Luke was doing, and 2 of those years hanging off the cliffhanger of that final scene from Episode 7.
          And the first thing we see Luke do is tarzan jumping and drinking tiddy milk.
          Good effect on target Rian. Fan level of seething 10/10.
          In retrospect who honestly gives a shit. I now understand why boomers were so buttblasted by Jar Jar in 1999 because of shattered expectations. Same shit happened when millennials saw the sequel trilogy.

          But at the end of the day Phantom Menace is still way better than any of the sequels. Its far more narratively coherent as a start to an envisioned trilogy that actually accomplishes what it was set out to do. It takes risks and goes out on limbs to expand the universe in ways the OT never did. Its art direction is unique enough from the OT but familiar enough to feel the same universe. They pushed the boundaries with technology and defined a new generation of special effects. The sequels do none of that and even without catastrophic director infighting between movies the sequels are completely cloistered by its obsession with nostalgia pandering for the OT to the point where it has absolutely no identity. Its absolutely clear no one involved had any true vision for the grandeur of Star Wars and passing it into new uncharted territory.
          Say what you want about Phantom Menace because its a very flawed movie, but it defined half of what we consider to be Star Wars to this day.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Luke Skywalker has always been a warm raw milk connoisseur. Pasteurized babby plebs wouldn't understand
        one of the few parts they got right

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >it's ok to make fun of Rey, Finn, Poe, Kylo and Hux
        >but nooooooo not my Lukerino!!!!!

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Saw this at the store yesterday. Not sure what its supposed to be referencing.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I bought a bottle and it’s just vanilla flavored but it’s tasty, might make a milkshake with it.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The milk scene is a israeli hate joke against white people.
        Jews are lactose intolerant, and they used the fact that whites drink milk to make white hero seem pathetic or disgusting.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >me when I see anime booba

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous
  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Star Wars was ruined when homosexual lucas made the prequels. There is no refuting this.

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I am sexually attracted to Jar Jar Binks.

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What's the preferred watch order for Star Wars? Narratively chronological or release order? Blurays or DVDs? Remasters, remastered remasters, or original 360p versions of 4, 5 and 6 and 480p DVDs for 1,2 and 3?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Release order obviously, shouldn't even need to be said.
      Unfortunately it's hard to find versions of the original trilogy that haven't been fricked with by Lucas. You have to go all the way back to the original VHS releases. I think there are people who have tried to make their own cuts based on the original versions, though usually those types of things are made by homosexuals who demand you send them proof you've paid for the movies before they send you their cuts, they don't just make them public.
      The rest don't matter, you can just do the modern versions. Episode 1 re-releases replaced puppet Yoda with CGI Yoda but the movie is already full of CGI.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >You have to go all the way back to the original VHS releases.
        nope even the original 81/82 releases were tampered with, lucas started hedging with the first theatrical re-releases. there's a reason the 4K projects are all based on initial theatrical reels or as close to it as they can get, those are the least tampered sources. but mind you his fidgeting back then was small shit you'd hardly even notice between cuts, like cardboard cutouts of rebels in the throne room.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Japanese laserdisc
        >original theatrical cut with no additional edits
        safe to say I won't be going to see the re-release

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Based, I completely agree with you. I always love the prequels no matter what and The Phantom Menace is always my most favourite prequel film no matter what. Happy 25th anniversary to The Phantom Menace. I saw The Phantom Menace in theaters twice, the first time was in 1999 when it came out for the first time and the second time was in 2012 when it was re-released in 3D. I'm happy to see it for the third time, but that said, what I really want is for The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi to be re-released in theaters so I can watch those films at my local theater because those films are the only Star Wars films I haven't seen on the big screen yet because when I was a kid, my family took me to see A New Hope but not the other two original trilogy films so I'm kind of desperate to see them. Also, frick The Acolyte, I'm never going to watch that shit because frick Disney Star Wars.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I forgot to add, I've obviously already seen The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi, just not in theaters. Yet.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >The Phantom Menace is always my most favourite prequel film
      I think all three are shit, but TPM is clearly the best one in a lot of respects.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >I think all three are shit
        I think all three are good, warts and all. Even cringey lines like "Are you an angel?" and "Now THIS is pod-racing!" have a cringey type of soul to them in my opinion, as opposed to completely soulless lines from the sequel trilogy like "Somehow, Palpatine returned.". That said, even though I deeply love the prequels and always will, I grew up more with the original trilogy than the prequels so I love the original trilogy slightly more than the prequels. Return Of The Jedi is my most favourite Star Wars film. I don't think any Disney Star Wars film is canon.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Well AotC is awful and only watchable for prime Padme eye candy. RotS has the (overrated) duel between obi Wan and Anakin (great soundtrack though). TPM got shit in for being so unlike the OT, but the world building and politics is great. Boring by comparison, but really sets up the context for the next 2 films.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Well AotC is awful and only watchable for prime Padme eye candy.
          https://ifdb.fanedit.org/star-wars-episode-ii-the-approaching-storm/

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            These fan cuts are never worth it.

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Are they going to release ROTS? I don't love going to the theater but would do so for ROTS

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >ROTS

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Do you think I'm going to read all of that?

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Okay, it was a dream.
        Did he miss the last movie where Anakin had visions of his mother dying and it came true?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          you can't argue with people who look for any excuse to hate something, it's a bad faith take.

          [...]
          Just good designs. Lucas has an eye for design, but can't write for shit. All the best Star Wars stuff was just based on their designs. The characters all actually suck. Maul and Fett both got ruined as soon as they wrote stories for them.

          he can write fine, what he can't do great is direct actors, and i say this knowing he intentionally directed the prequel cast to be more absurd and wooden than he did in the originals. his bigger concern is getting the shot right, acting is less of a concern to him.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >he can write fine
            He really can't; it's the reason the OT gets worse as it goes along and the prequels are a mess from the get-go.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              that's funny because both have only improved over time. yeah the special effects haven't aged as gracefully but the dialogue was always on point. it's why i hate the sequels so much, there'd be a scene here and there that absolutely nails it and shows that star wars can be made without lucas and then the rest of the film just completely misses the fricking point. like the early conversations between hux and kylo ren are pure bliss. the conversations with rey and well anyone that she interacts with are just god awful.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The Disney movies are terrible but that doesn't make the prequels better. Making that argument concedes the whole property is shitty/played out and you have to gage individual movies by internally comparing them to one another.

                Lucas is just a terrible writer who initially lucked out when he kept the story simple and pumped in SFX that could carry the movies on their own.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >screenshotting a Maddox article in 2024
        pal, shouldn't you be at work?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I think they have it out in some places but only if you do a full marathon of all 9 movies

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >if we all go see it, it'll be a big frick you to Disney!
    Chuds, not even once

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Is this the cringe re edited version where Yoda is CGI or is it the actual 1999 version

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      CGI Yoda is superior and I'm tired of pretending it's not.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It worked better than TPM's original dodgy puppet and felt more appropriate given all the other CGI characters, but CGI Yoda also facilitated some of the worst shit in the prequels.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >but CGI Yoda also facilitated some of the worst shit in the prequels.
          presumably you're referring to his lightsaber duels in 2 and 3. the duel in 2 was alright but the duel in 3 was kino, frick you.

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >with an exclusive look at Acolyte
    No thanks

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    My mom went to walmart for the weekly groceries. She bought me the new Trumoo star wars blue milk. She was all excited. I thanked her but couldn't bring myself to tell her how depressed it made me feel. I wish i could feel anything positive in regard to star wars.

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You just know half the audience is gonna be plinkett fans.
    >WHATS WRONG WITH YOUR FACE!?

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They need to just nuke the ST already so we can all move on

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      won't happen until kennedy is gone and a straight white conservative male takes her place. so in other words we need to get myself instated as ceo of lucasfilm to change the company around.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        They didn't even have any ST footage in their May the 4th promo video. It's possible they might be ready to pull the trigger

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          no they'll be silent about it but you forget that a rey skywalker movie is currently in the works.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Just like that Rogue Squadron movie that got announced and forgotten

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Every normal human being moved on. You only have utter morons still caring about SW.

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    TPM is the least cringe one of the Prequels

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why do they keep re-releasing this one and then not follow through with the others?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Because AotC is so bad. It was always the worst of the 6 movies.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      the first time was due to the lucasfilm sale and focus on force awakens, which when you think about it is ridiculous considering you only need a small team to work on 3D conversions. the second time is simply because lucasfilm has nothing going for it and the sequels are so bad that it has made people appreciate the prequels.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      they got all three showing here

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Because seeing the first one reminds the audience of how shitty the movies are so they can't expect to turn profit by bothering to rerelease the others.

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They've gone up the ventilation shaft

  23. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    When they turn Galaxy's Edge at Disney Land into Tatooine Land we'll know it's finally over

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      won't happen
      it will forever stay batuu but if we're lucky we'll see the sequel characters disappear overnight
      hope they keep park rey, she's so sexy it hurts

      What is it with Disney and these Masonic poster designs

      poor man's struzan, since he retired for real they've aped his style hardcore, only it looks like shit since they all just use photoshop. also something about ancient cabals and the like but that's neither here nor there.

  24. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What is it with Disney and these Masonic poster designs

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They just don't know how to hire painters

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Slop

        SOVL

  25. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    ?si=OR9dFNQQbalkvMxE

  26. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They should do this with all classic movie. Play stuff at the cinema people actually want to see, or at least take their kids too. Yes Phantom Menace fans have kids.

  27. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Seeing this in theaters was one of my best theater going experiences as a kid when it came out, it's better than anything currently out

  28. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I am pro Jar Jar Binks

    ?si=nmb4rMruWbr7U4Ye

  29. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Can someone explaine how is he supposed to have a dick in his ass when all around we thought he was eating chuba chubs? Makes no sense to his cherecter arc. Redditor film criticism is disgusting.

  30. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I remember seeing it in theaters when it came out after growing up watching the OT and feeling disappointed. But nothing prepared me for attempting to watch the new Disney bullshit. Prequel trilogy is kino in comparison..

  31. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm going to see it soon. Pretty excited. Been a while since I saw it in theaters.

  32. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Kino has returned to theaters
    Pic unrelated, obviously

  33. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would go so I can join in with the hooting and hollering at my local cinemark
    but I have to tune into the amazing digital synagogue episode 2 stream at 5.

  34. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >this smol boy?
    >NOW THAT'S POD RACING!
    >check out his midichlorians tho!
    >who bro! there's a sith apprentice! might be a conspiracy!
    >let's give dictarorial powers to this guy we're suspicious of! Great idea!
    >good thing this giant army showed up at the same time there's a conspiracy promoting a galatic war!
    >THE JEDI DON'T RESPECT MY POWER LEVEL!
    >I LOVE PADME SO FRICKING MUCH...AS MUCH AS I HATE FRICKING SAND!
    >let's send Anakin to tail the guy we're suspicious of and gave all that power to, even though we sense something off about Anakin and won't let him on the council
    >HE A SITH LORD!
    >padme...will die
    >I BETTER TRUST YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU STARTED THE GALACTIC WAR TO GAIN POWER! BYE BYE "1000 GENERATIONS" OF GOVERNMENT!
    >[murders children]
    >Anakin, I'm your FREN!
    >sperg sperg MUH POWA LEVEL! sperg sperg
    >Anakin...you're breaking my heart!
    >zeeeer ZERRRRRRR zeeeeer [twirling lightsabers]
    >AHHHH! MY ARM! MY LEGS! HATE! HAAAAAAAATEEEEEEE!
    >we can't find anything wrong with her...it appears she died of a...broken heart
    >AND PADME?
    >she told you that you were breaking her heart, bro
    >NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Keep crying, homosexual. It's not going to change the fact you've outed yourself as a moron multiple times ITT (i.e. gone over and above being a prequelgay lol)

      i can see now you're the one who's crying lmao
      meanwhile i'll continue to enjoy my prequel kino

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The movies are moronic. More examples:
        >the clone army was uncovered while investigating a conspiracy related to the sith/war
        >they literally just go along with this amazing coincidence because they're moronic
        >they all get murdered because the plot needs it to happen
        ...
        >massive conflict spanning thousands of planets all across the galaxy
        >literally going on for decades at this point with millions upon millions of people involved
        >it ends because the plot needs it to (i.e. 3 mins of screentime in which Anakin kills 5 or 6 people)
        ...
        >Anakin trusts Palpatine, a Sith who started a massive war killing millions for the sake of his own power, and betrays the Jedi
        >the excuse is "PADME THO! JEDI DON'T RESPECT MUH POWER LEVEL!"
        >the relationship between Anakin/Padme generates no actual conflict within the plot (the audience is just told "FORBIDDEN ROMANCE!" even though nothing actually inhibits them)
        >the plot is literally just "EMOTIONS ARE CONFUSING AND RELATIONSHIPS CAUSE EMOTIONS!"

        Basically, shit needs to happen in order for the plot to move forward so it does. Sure, there are lots of nonsensical plot holes but this is low-hanging fruit that has been done to death (basically cheap YouTube style criticism). The deeper problem is that the plot isn't being driven by characters in something that has the pretense of being a tragedy; tragedy is specifically character driven as far as that genre goes. You end up with simplistic moron takes from the characters while the plot happens to them and them making decisions that are kind of stupid because the plot simply needs to happen.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >NO YOU!!!!!
          Lol, you're a moron dumb enough to enjoy poorly written quasi-kids movies that didn't even know who their audience was. Keep crying, prequelgay. Providing the opportunity to dunk on you morons is the greatest gift George Lucas ever bestowed.

          still going lmao

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >still going
            Want to cry about friend simulator videos that made fun of Star Wars almost 2 decades ago? Lol

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              no idea what you're on about, you should dry the tears from your keyboard though

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >manbaby still crying instead of discussing his kids movies
                I introduced that gif to Cinemaphile. You're welcome.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >I introduced that gif to Cinemaphile
                nice quads but that gif is older than you

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >literally going on for decades at this point with millions upon millions of people involved
          It went on for 3 years.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            It started with the boring trade federation nonsense decades before, moron. Besides, even if it only started 3 years before it still involved millions upon millions of people and is wrapped up in 2 minutes of screentime because the plot needed it.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >they literally just go along with this amazing coincidence because they're moronic
          They had no other choice and Palpatine had a lot of sway within the senate.
          >it ends because the plot needs it to (i.e. 3 mins of screentime in which Anakin kills 5 or 6 people)
          It ends because Palpatine, who started the war, didn't need it anymore and killed those 5 or 6 people who were the only other leaders within the seperatist movement.
          >the relationship between Anakin/Padme generates no actual conflict within the plot (the audience is just told "FORBIDDEN ROMANCE!" even though nothing actually inhibits them)
          Romantic are forbidden by the jedi.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            don't bother replying, that anon is moronic and thinks they know how to write movies

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I think perhaps the point that doesnt fully come across is that the Jedi are autistic wackos who dont understand human emotions and they trained Anakin to be halfway like them.

          Basically it makes sense when you look at it like Anakin has major oneitis for Padme and is basically completely fricked in the head due to all the mind games going on. Realize that from his perspective the Jedi want to take away everything he loves while Palpatine is completely supportive of him.

          Then Obi-Wan comes along secretly and then goads Anakin into a light saber fight while lacking any sort of empathy for where hes coming from. I mean instead of saying let her go, he could have asked what Palpatine promised him or what he was motivated to do? Why was he so scared? Why did he kill the children? Really the entire movie can be explained in that the Jedi are autistic wackos who dont understand human motivations due to their detachment idealogy and thats why Palpatine is able to manipulate everyone so well because he knows exactly how to frick with Anakins head, he knows exactly how the Jedi think and operate.

          I mean if Obi Wan loved Anakin so much why didnt he just say stop this non-sense im not here to kill you, your wife is pregnant lets help her first...but no the plot necessitates all this moronation because we need to get Anakin into the darth vader suit.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I mean instead of saying let her go, he could have asked what Palpatine promised him or what he was motivated to do?
            Kek

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I mean maybe in that moment he could have just said She did'nt bring me here, im not here to kill you, im just as confused as you are and I want to find out whats going on.

              Instead really Obi-Wan is there to kill Anakin and Anakin is completely right to be fearful of Obi-Wan being his enemy. But Obi-Wan is acting like a fricking whackjob because Yoda just tells him that Anakin is dead and consumed by Vader which is just completely bonkers. Yoda is completely fricked in the head because George has to hamfistly try to make what they say in the OT work except at this point Anakin is most definately not too far gone, hes only too far gone after Obi-Wan betrays him and Padme dies.

              Essentially Obi-Wan and Yoda are completely responsible for all the fricked up shit Anakin goes through and the creation of Darth Vader because they cant think like normal human beings.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >because they cant think like normal human beings
                They were indoctrinated into the Order in infancy and are dogmatic to a fault. Anakin got in at 9. He's more normal than they are, and suffered because of it. Qui-Gon was literally his only chance.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >NO YOU!!!!!
        Lol, you're a moron dumb enough to enjoy poorly written quasi-kids movies that didn't even know who their audience was. Keep crying, prequelgay. Providing the opportunity to dunk on you morons is the greatest gift George Lucas ever bestowed.

  35. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Reminder the only way to watch Phantom Menace is the VHS/early DVD version with puppet Yoda. The updated ones with CGI Yoda are not kino or sovlful in any way. You watch the early edition and pretend no other movies were made.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I haven't seen it in so long I didn't know the new versions have CGI Yoda. That's lame

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >puppets verse cartoons
        Dumb argument either way. Star Wars is for dumb kids (like boybands) and manbabies (like funkos).

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It is but at least you can choose (if you're smart) between having sovless CGI slop or a puppet Yoda, like the original movies had. Small change but big difference.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Playing "I'm an adult and don't watch kids movies" while posting on an anime website is a bit of an oxymoron, innit?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Your childhood bullies didn't do a good enough job on you so I'm forced to step in. Bonus is the laughs at your expense. Thanks.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              It's embarrassing that you're even here if that's how you feel

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >n-n-no you though!
                Lol. Imagine having to watch Star Wars as a surrogate for failing to develop intellectually and emotionally.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Still an anime website you post on btw

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >still trying to recycle the same insult
                Hasn't been one since the 00s. Stop pretending to be an oldgay, prequeltard.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Quit being a fricking nerd.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's Star Wars, dipshit. Time is limited, life is precious. Don't waste it on sovlless garbo as much as possible.

  36. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The Prequels? More like The Keyedquels.

  37. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They should remaster it like they did with the OT. Most of it was shot on green screen so it'd be less clunky than OT.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I have altered the films, pray I don't alter them any further

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They only do that if they think they can make money and Lucas cared so little that he sold it to Disney, lol. He's a shit writer/director and helped turned movies into cartoons but he's a shrewd businessman.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The prequels had a shit ton of practical effects. A lot of the locations were miniatures that they'd superimpose the actors onto.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Doesn't change the fact they were mostly CG and Lucas played a major role in turning movies into cartoons.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            There was no other way to make certain ideas happen. It couldn't have been done practically. Get over it.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >There was no other way to make certain ideas happen
              Too bad he used it for sets that looked like shit and ended up seeming smaller than building a practical set would have, moron. Lol.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >spend millions developing sophisticated CGI technology for your trilogy of films
          >able to render huge scale battles with hundreds of actors playing unique animations
          >said technology becomes the industry norm within a couple years
          >immediately pivot and make a shitty cartoon with 3DCG blender animations where there is one shared running animation for all the characters
          >sell the company
          we could have had 7 seasons of clone wars with movie-level effects, but he turned in to a cartoon for children, even more so than before

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Genndy Tartakovsky, the guy who made 2D Clone Wars, wanted TCW to be a series of films. Had they been films from the start, they would've looked much better and stand alongside the likes of Pixar and Dreamworks.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I think 2 seasons of Genndy Wars was more than plenty

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The 3D animation would've been godly though.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I never liked how too clean the PT looked. Having seen all BtS footage it explains why. Wherever they could get away with it greenscreen was used.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >I never liked how too clean the PT looked
        It should look clean. It's the Old Republic, not the Empire.

  38. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Just got out of my local kinoplex, it was still a really good movie, I wish they still showed or released '99 version if only for comparisons sake. I remember the puppetry for Yoda in I being subpar.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I remember the puppetry for Yoda in I being subpar.
      it was
      also fun fact, warwick davis actually wore a yoda costume for the scene towards the end of the film where he tells obi-wan of the plan to train anakin

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I can see it, he shows up in like three different roles in the film, maybe more.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          yeah he does do at least three iirc. he's space willow at the podrace, i believe he plays a jawa somewhere along the lines, might have done some motion capture for the pit droids, and then yoda as well.

          i just checked, he's also anakin's rodian friend & you can apparently see him walking the streets of mos espa as a totally unrelated character to any of the above mentioned.

  39. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    actually the best movie of the prequels
    I'll not watch in the theater again though

  40. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They teased an Acolytes preview prior to the film but at the end of the movie 99% of the people there got up and left without seeing the preview except for my friend and I. I haven't kept up with Disney Wars but the preview looked really lame. Are people really looking forward to that show?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Are people really looking forward to that show?
      besides carrie ann moss being in the show nobody is looking forward to it.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I like the premise of the show more than most Star Wars stuff we've gotten, but I don't have high hopes for it. I'll watch the first episode or two but I wouldn't say I'm dying to see it.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I’ve consoomed some of the mouse slop like Mando and Boba Fett but have no intention in watching Acolyte. Casting ugly mutts and writing girlboss characters were bad enough, but now there’s a troony Jedi in Acolyte. Frick Disney, I’m out.

  41. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >watch 3 shit films in a row so you can watch 1 good, 1 great and 1 decent set of films from the 70s and 80s

  42. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    gonna watch it tomorrow
    anything i should shout in the middle of the function?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      just the good old "george lucas did nothing wrong"

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There was a woman in my showing who either had never seen Star Wars or was moronic (or both). She was talking a lot during the movie but at this part where R2-D2 is commended for saving the ship, there's a pause before Captain Panaka says his number, and the woman said "...C-3PO!" Made me laugh.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You should actually be quiet and listen, because that's what nobody did.

  43. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What the frick. Runs for 3 days, my local kinoplex already sold all seats. How the frick did that happen? I thought everyone hated it. I went to see the rerun of LOTR RotK and there was almost nobody there. Does Star Wars have that BIG of a sway or is it some shitty bug on the theather's side?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Does Star Wars have that BIG of a sway
      pre-disney star wars does, yes. next year when they do a 10th anniversary screening of the force awakens you'll see nobody going to it.

  44. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Masallah!

  45. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    bros /ourshlag/ has spoken, we have to go see it now

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      shut up b***h, you were moaning about the prequels ruining your career until reddit made it cool to love them
      sneaky israelite I still love you though

  46. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would go if it was the 99' print and not just the D+ version on a big screen

  47. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I get what George was going for but Anakin really should have been a little older in TPM

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      nah, seeing anakin be a hopeful young child is kino. filtered.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >watch to the end of the credits for Phantom Menace for the first time in years
      >Darth Vader breathing is the last sound that plays after the final credits roll
      Was that in the original film? I honestly never noticed it before and it caught me off guard.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        This is the first time I've ever heard of it. Definitely sounds like something Disney or a George re-release would do

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      it would also help with other implications

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Let's be honest, boys having crushes on older girls isn't exactly rare.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        If you see Natalie Portman when she was being scouted for the role in 1997 / 1998-ish she looked more aprapo for the role.
        They probably should’ve cast an actual 14 year old so that they would age up to 15/16 by the time of principle photography began rather than Portman being 16 going on 17/18. Hiccup in that casting department on that one because the age difference is striking.

  48. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Brehs I bought the R2D2 popcorn bucket

  49. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They already rereleased it in 3d forever ago, then they stopped because Lucas sold it

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >3D RotS was taken from us
      GEORGE

  50. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >giving Disney money because of some shitty fantasy movie you watched as a kid

  51. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The older I get the sadder I feel seeing Anakin as a happy kid in this movie knowing what’s going to happen to him in the next two films, that dialogue with him and Qui Gon talking about seeing all the stars really stuck with me on this viewing.
    Something about Phantom Menace feels the most like the original trilogy to me of all the subsequent Star Wars films, maybe it’s the more lighthearted tone or something but it’s comfy to me.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's even more sad knowing what's going to happen to Jake

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        True, I feel so sorry for him and I hope he’s getting the mental help he needs.
        If I remember correctly he actually had a very positive experience from filming the movie but came down with different mental illnesses later in life (damn shame because he could be making tons of money at cons now).

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Something about Phantom Menace feels the most like the original trilogy to me of all the subsequent Star Wars films, maybe it’s the more lighthearted tone or something but it’s comfy to me.
      You're absolutely right about that. It was also the last SW shot on film instead of digital.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah I never quite liked how 2 and 3 looked with digital, I think their CG would be a bit better received if not totally shot on digital.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It also had a lot of Tatooine and that made it feel more connected to the OT

  52. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'll repeat it: the podracing scene is unironically a masterpiece and looks better than 95% of the cgi crap that has been released in the past decade

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Those sounds Sebulba’s podracer makes are cool as frick

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Almost every sound effect in George era Star Wars was so good. Disney live action Star Wars can't even get the blaster sounds right, let alone the music

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Those are miniatures by the way.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It is.
      Lots of the fun games, lit, & expanded material from the racing were pretty good too.

  53. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    watching this scene 9 times in cinema was glorious

  54. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >you will watch this video again because we put a le sneak peek

  55. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    But when are they going to release the best prequel, Attack of the Clones?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      2027

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'm so dosappointed AotC isn't in theaters, I wanted to watch it on the big screen so bad after finishing TPM.

  56. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    watch the RLM reviews

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >watch the RLM review chud
      >check the yelp chud
      >listen to the RYM hits chud
      I fricking hate reviews. They could be somewhat avoided before the internet (don’t look at catalogs with reviews, no one to hear word of mouth from) but by god is it nigh impossible now. You can’t do anything without first hearing some lame homosexuals opinion. It has ruined the ability of modern man to use the section of his brain to seek out new and interesting stimuli. Why bother searching for novelty when the rest of tribe has already decided where the best sustenance is? Unfortunately, most members of the tribe are fricking morons. It has lead to unfathomable amounts of groupthink and bugmen who will vehemently defend any opposition to their awful decided upon taste. In no rational world is the best musical composition throughout all of history a fricking Kendrick Lamar album. Frick reviews and frick you for subscribing to some fat Black folk “correct opinion” on subjective media.

  57. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >so this bad guy sith is a count
    >ok he's called count... dakula? no no too obvious, dokula? dooku, that's it dooku
    >quick, get Mr Lee on the phone
    kino or bino?

  58. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    These are worth watching just for amidalas costumes.

  59. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    why is the acting so fricking bad in the phantom menace? they aren't bad actors and do a fine job in AotC and RotS. Did they just not rehearse or get any direction or what

    ?si=ezMmQ0JghT1saD71&t=200

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      She's fine in other scenes. It's just her Queen voice.

  60. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I saw it in 3d a decade ago. Not many people were in the theater. Then Disney canceled the releases to do sequels. I wonder if 3d files for Empire Strikes back are out there. I have honestly seen the movie too many times.

  61. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I noticed something for the first time in this viewing: right before Anakin goes to the Jedi temple and Amidala goes to the Senate, there's a scene where Anakin tries to say goodbye to Padmé but he's told she's not around. Then the Queen comes out and tells Anakin she'll make sure Padmé gets the message. What I didn't catch before is that it was actually Padmé in the Queen's garb, that she had switched places with her decoy for that scene and also the Senate scene.
    Am I the only one who didn't notice this before? Either way it's a great little detail.

  62. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    just starting Phantom Menace @ https://bongstream.live/north/

  63. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Based, I completely agree with you. I always love the prequels no matter what and The Phantom Menace is always my most favourite prequel film no matter what. Happy 25th anniversary to The Phantom Menace. I saw The Phantom Menace in theaters twice, the first time was in 1999 when it came out for the first time and the second time was in 2012 when it was re-released in 3D. I'm happy to see it for the third time, but that said, what I really want is for The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi to be re-released in theaters so I can watch those films at my local theater because those films are the only Star Wars films I haven't seen on the big screen yet because when I was a kid, my family took me to see A New Hope but not the other two original trilogy films so I'm kind of desperate to see them. Also, frick The Acolyte, I'm never going to watch that shit because frick Disney Star Wars. Anyway, happy Pre-Disney Star Wars Day, may the Fourth be with you all you homosexuals.

  64. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I’m gonna be stuck in Canada, anybody know if Canadian theaters are playing it?

  65. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Shan't be going. Made the mistake of going thrice when I was a kid and by the third time the stupidity of what I was watching finally started sinking in. Haven't watched since. Since that time, starting with Episode II, I have had a policy of going to the theater to watch the new Star Wars movie exactly once, one time, and then never watching it again. I remember finding things in Episode III worth liking, and Rogue One was the most enjoyable flick I had seen since Jedi. But I don't feel a need to revisit anything made after 1983.

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