>left home alone
>doesn't begin jerking off furiously
What would you do... if left home alone?
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>left home alone. >doesn't begin masturbating furiously
Do kids know how to jerk off? When I was a kid I would just thump my pelvis with 4 fingers while holding in my pee.
>Do kids know how to jerk off?
I remember my parents kept some lotion in the bathroom to keep their skin smooth. Whenever seven year old me got out of the shower I would take some and apply it to both my hands and I would make an O shape on both my hands. I would then pull them up my dick while think about she hulk. I did this for several months until one day my mother caught me and asked me if I was thinking about girls. After that I stopped until I was 15.
I definitely remember rubbing my peepee because it felt good for a few years before I could actually ejaculate, so I think so.
>skipping school in the 3rd grade
>white trashy friend comes over
>rummages through my house eating all my food
>"borrows all my shit"
>explain masturbation to him
>end up being forced raped and pee'd on
>parents come home and my mom tells me I smell like urine and the house is a mess
>get beat by parents
>explain masturbation to him
>end up being forced raped and pee'd on
what
>wojack poster
he's lying
i wish it was a lie, haven't been the same since
>"thats not how you jack off, let me see your pussy"
mfw
>your pussy
Did you mean bussy?
i'm a girl
>im a girl
I know it's cliché but breasts or gtfo.
YWNBAW
My cousin showed me how when I was 12 IIRC.
I heard about the Pee Wee Herman scandal, so I was doing it before my balls dropped. (Yes, I am very old, thank you for asking.)
>oh sweet mom and dad aren’t home!
>smoke some weed
>play guitar
>watch a movie
>fall asleep
>parents come home
>so what did you do while we were gone?
>N-NOTHING I SWEAR
they knew
Just missing a nice fap sesh
>a fap sesh
just one?
this, i would do all the shit i'm too embarrassed to do when everyone's home
>take a loud brapping foundation rumbling shit
>take mushrooms, smoke weed drink during the daytime
>make delectable and elaborate dishes/food
>play guitar and sing out loud, with nobody home to cringe at me i wouldn't care, i'd probably record an entire album with my walmart recording set up.
>walk around in my underwear
>fap all day and do other kinky shit while high on mushrooms/weed
>sleep in till 1pm
>eat at 3am
>as previous posters commented, raid my cousin's panty drawers and sniff them (if i had sexy cousins living with me)
can't wait till I live and die home alone.
I thought I'd do stuff like this when I lived alone too. But most days I just work then lay in bed staring at the ceiling until work the next day.
Kevin being a blonde would have had a VERY light pinkish dick. Most likely when he gets closer to cumming the head turns a little red/purple with blood and anticipation.
Buzz on the other hand probably much darker wiener, but not as thick of a hog as uncle Frank I’m my opinion Franks would be more leathery and thicker than Buzz’s ONLY do to age and use over the years.
>Straight into mommies panty drawer.
>panty robbers come round and join in sniffing and licking and jerking off.
It wouldn't have been such a big hit, but it would at least have been honest film making.
I'm personally glad they cut that scene of Kevin licking the crotch of his cousins panties, too graphic
>doesn't call his best friend Michael Jackson to pick him up and take him to Neverland
I don't get this plothole.
i've been home alone for 11 years
You're not alone anon, your mom is within your spirit, she's with you every time you brush your teeth and every time you eat warm food.
She's that part of you that wants you to feel safe, be healthy and grow - that voice within you isn't your own, it is hers.
This was very heartwarming and I'm disappointed that none of you degenerates gave this a (you)
i was going to reply but i couldn't find the right frog
It was a different era. I would have just played my gameboy if I was him tbh
He was probably getting enough sex that the thought of jerking off as a substitute didn't occur yet.