This is a changes in the movies that does piss me off.
Gandalf suggesting to go through moria shows gandalf is not always in the right and even he and aragorn, two noble paragons, can squabble and have petty arguments.
Likewise, Gimlis reaction to Moria in the books is a mix of fear and wonder. It's the place of his ancestors but he knows Daryl and evil things live there. He's extremely conflicted.
They went with Gimlis being the jar jar binks of the group instead.
genius, we all know Boromir also wasn't influenced by it because he never put it on
4 months ago
Anonymous
Boromir took months just to be influenced, and he had to know the ring was there.
Eagles take like 15 seconds to fly to Mordor, and you don't have to tell them you're carrying a magical ring of power just tell them it's confidential
4 months ago
Anonymous
The eagles have essentially magic receptors that are a perfect match for the ring and it would corrupt them almost instantly. They know this so they stay away.
4 months ago
Anonymous
sounds like bullshit cope for why the eagles didn't fly them to Mordor
4 months ago
Anonymous
Would you understand if a recovering meth addict didn't want to help deliver a large quantity of crystal to the police department?
4 months ago
Anonymous
Balrog didn't give a frick about the ring and he's a literal energy being, this whole "muh eagles are addicted to evil powers" thing seems like something you pulled out of your ass
4 months ago
Anonymous
The Ring shut the frick up and quieted down in Moria. It didn't want to be claimed by the Balrog.
4 months ago
Anonymous
Why was it chasing them? Just cause of Gandalf?
4 months ago
Anonymous
The balrog who.... attacked them? Or a different balrog who was not mentioned because it didnt show up because it didnt give a shit? >muh small objects falling down a well
Pippin might have woken up but let me remind you vast sections of moria are in RUIN and things fall and go bump. There is also no way the vast depths are entirely silent on their own. Even if the balrog was sleeping, it was scanning for Morgoth, and therefore set to receive magical feelings or whatever you call it. I think the ring called out to it, and made it feel rageful about the transgression, so that it would come kill the powerful ones while the weak ones snuck away in a state of uncontrollable fear.
4 months ago
Anonymous
Like if it were really just waiting for Morgoth with no interfering motives or forces acting upon it, then it would be sorting all events into one of two categories: Morgoth, or Not Morgoth. A bone or rock falling and making a thud goes into Not Morgoth and per the definition of "waiting for Morgoth" it would not have pursued it.
So I think the ring basically reached out and made it mad. Cooked the balrog the whole time it was in its sphere of influence, to be pissed when it was disturbed.
4 months ago
Anonymous
No they don’t lol, that’s fanfic shit you made up, and it won’t corrupt shit. It couldn’t corrupt Gandalf for months from afar and it couldn’t corrupt eagles in the 15 seconds they would take to drop it in the volcano
4 months ago
Anonymous
the eagles are extremely prideful so are very vulnerable to the ring
4 months ago
Anonymous
the eagles would've been intercepted by the nazgul riding wyrms. the eagles were still suffering from casualties in the war of the 5 armies and trying to repopulate so fighting unkillable wyrmriders was not on their list of things to do
4 months ago
Anonymous
Aragorn thwarted them with a fricking torch. They could just wear magical flaming helmets and be fine.
4 months ago
Anonymous
they came back, anon. plus, the witch king wasn't there. the eagles would've had all of mordor's attention, his included
4 months ago
Anonymous
Flaming. Magical. Helmets.
4 months ago
Anonymous
And how many months did it take for the group that attacked Isildur?
4 months ago
Anonymous
>Eagles take like 15 seconds to fly to Mordor, >15 seconds
fricking. moron.
Mountains and rivers and trees have intelligence, they're like spirits. Like how Tom Bombadill's wife Goldberry is the daughter of the river running through that land.
[...]
only Gimli thought that, because Gimli's a stupid dwarf. Gandalf corrected him that it was actually Sauronman doing it.
Nah it's Redhorn itself, and the spell Saruman casts is just him saying "WAKE UP REDHORN".
4 months ago
Anonymous
Someone fricked a river?
4 months ago
Anonymous
>Like how Tom Bombadill's wife Goldberry is the daughter of the river running through that land >mfw Tolkien was hindupilled
4 months ago
Anonymous
lalalalalalala I’m in love with lovely Tommy
4 months ago
Anonymous
just read this mythology, very uncanny similarity to a chinese myth, Chang'e the moon goddess "stealing the elicir of immortality" from a similar sun/ archer god Yi
here's a sorta gay song about it https://youtu.be/cxe3V-06UAU
It was raised by Melkor when he first came to earth, since then evil things keeps spawning in there in the dark. Gandalf himself claims he saw a lot of nameless thing when he was pursuing the Balrog in its ancient corridors
they'd have been held up and the ring seized by that fat cuck steward Denethor, dooming middle earth.
did you miss half the plot where the ring holds far more control over man than the other races and where Gondor royalty specifically has a really bad habit of succumbing to it?
Yeah but Father'smean had daddy issues consuming him
4 months ago
Anonymous
Daddy issues ironically saved him. Father'smean was too much like Dementedoor in reference their natural high mental defenses. Bore-on-here was fricked because the favorite is always coddled to hell.
that's not exactly increasing my hopes for the ring making it safely through gondor. in fact that's what I meant in the first place, a corrupt typical human man is in charge of Gondor.
Gondor itself is teeming with orcs, is literally being occupied by orcs led by the nazghul with t he express purpose of intercepting the ring and blockading gondor as the ring barely manages to slip through it by sheer luck
the line of stewards is loosely related to the same line as that of the kings, they have a small amount of royal blood but none of them try and get uppity because they know the people would just slap them down
By the third age, the lands south of Eriador are unpopulated grasslands. We know Sauron uses birds as spies, and the ringwraiths will come back as a problem. The fellowship would have been spotted and destroyed along the way. Recall that the objective is to sneak into Mordor while Sauron expects the ring to go to Gondor where it can be used to challenge him.
>the ringwraiths
Complete jobbers. Aragorn on his own managed to drive off seven of them at the Weathertop. With the entire fellowship they could easily take on 100 of them.
Yeah but why wouldn't they send the witch king if sauron saw gandalf & co in the grasslands?
Fellowship doesn't have any women so Witch King would be invincible against them
There options:
Continue over the mountains, which they probably could've done, and wouldve been ultimately much much easier than Moria.
Or head for the gap of Rohan and risk Saruman's orc scouts (but encounter the ent husbands earlier)
Or.
Head for the Gray Havens with a company of elves, including GLORFINDEL WHO WAS AT THE COUNCIL AND HAS FRICKING FOUGHT AND DEFEATED A BALROG PERSONALLY and sale around the southern edge of the map to Gondor with a navy.
This is allegedly more close to what Sauron was expecting, actually he expected them more to send the Ring to Valinor, but in general for there to be a full host.
The Fellowships intent was stealth, but that stealth doesnt make too much in the grand scheme when Sauron already knows of the Ring's presence and general location (Rivendell).
Heading east with a small band was successfully a surprise, but unimaginably risky.
Have Tom Bombadil dance a merry fricking dance and somehow the snow would turn to marshmallows and they’d ski down it like the cool motherfrickers that they are.
There, the alternative.
Am I literally the only able to think outside the box? JRR Hackien was a hack for making the map in such a way that this was possible.
What if there's a giant squid under Sauron's control? You want The Fellowship to end up like in them Japanese hentais?
4 months ago
Anonymous
The creature in the lake outside the secret moria entrance was not allied with Sauron, just an intelligent and malevolent power like the Balrog.
4 months ago
Anonymous
tbqhwy the powerful and sentient unknowns out there are possibly worse than any creature under Sauron's control. The ring would have ultimately betrayed them, but two dark lords at the same time when only one underpowered one is kicking their asses would be devestating.
Daryl apologist detected
>Daryl apologist detected
There needs to be more Daryl apologists really. Dude was minding his own business when the outside world dropped in on him.
Nobody is arguing against these options.
Merely explaining that the Fellowships objective was an incredibly risky stealth gambit, attempting to avoid high level political strife and temptation.
They probably should have taken Glorfindel with them though.
His presence alone scares off the Black riders, but that was consider too high profile.
4 months ago
Anonymous
>They probably should have taken Glorfindel with them though.
He was nerfed into being a wamen into the films though (would have happened even without him being replaced with Arwen), which would have made for its own unique set of challenges for such a mission of adventurers.
Gandalf and Frodo stop being procrastinating tards and take the ring earlier in the year. Then they can pass over the mountains in the summer instead of the dead of winter
Fricking newbies not knowing a literal river to the sea runs right through Rivendell.
They could of turned a fricking multi month-year travel into a few weeks.
there are pirates and sea monsters and their closest port near morder puts them in gondor, a place they dont want to go to because of ambitious men and looking out of place, which defeats the point of a secret mission
>AUUUUUGH Gandalf you rat! You weren’t buying time for the Fellowship to escape, you were planning to give me the ol’ three day battle! How could you give a fellow Maiar the ol’ three day battle??
As opposed to having 0 characterisation in the book? The one thing the films did, especially the hobbit was give distinguishing characterisations to tolkien's litany of oin, gloin, groin, bori, bofi, sloppy, toppy, beebo, booba, merry, murray, pippa, poopa
>Gandalf suggesting to go through moria shows gandalf is not always in the right
If they hadn't gone through Moria, and Gollum hadn't started following them, Sauron would have ended up with the ring after Frodo failed to destroy it. Or maybe they would never have made it into Mordor without Gollum in the first place, and they would have all died defending Minas Tirith.
Gimlis portrayal was abysmal. The acting was fine, but they turned the character into a clown. It's pretty egregious in TTT and RotK.
[...]
That an Alan Lee pic? Never seen it before.
>The acting was fine, but they turned the character into a clown.
That's pretty much all he was in the books as well. Pretty much every line he has after moria is delivered in a comdecy style/for comedic relief. >Banter with Legolas over who killed more orcs in Helm's deep >Banter with Merry & Pippin that they owe him for the wild 3 hunters goose chase >Banter with Pippin about how hthe hobbit would've been iced at the towers of the teeth if he didn't jump in amd save him >Banter with Eomer about how he'll axe anyone who says Galadriel isn't the fairest woman alive >General banter for the entirety of the books as he interacts with Legolas and they become friends
Gimli was a comedic character the entirety of the books- the movies just turned it up a little bit so the jokes would land for a mondern audience and because they had Rhys Davies
Finally someone recognizes this.
Yes people, we get it. The LoTR movies were a bit goofy at times. Merry and Pippin were way too clownish even after they "stepped up".
The Legolas oliphaunt scene was also fricking dumb at the time, youre not bringing anything new to the table there either
But if you werent all 17 year old shitkids, you would have understood the literal roars of approval in theaters when we saw that the first time. These movies had Gravity, that means you could get away with silly stuff at times for levity so that the non-diehard fans wouldnt get bored.
All three movies are literally perfect, flaws and all. Thats not a contradiction
Agreed. I was something like 12 when Two Towers came out and distinctly remember how cool we thought Legolas' action sequences had been in the first 2 films and how me and my friends would speculate on what epic move they would have him do in RoTK. They delivered with the Oliphaunt move.
Sure as an adult its over the top and too goofy, but frick that I wasn't an adult when the movies came out.
This guy gets it. You simply cannot get a 1:1 translation of a book, let alone LOTR, to the fricking screen. So many normie morons alone cried about "too many endings". We're LUCKY we didn't get studio meddling to the same degree as The Hobbit with their beardless "Twilight-sexy" dwarves in love triangles with elves. I'll fricking take Gimli's relatively few antics any day over what they did to The Hobbit "trilogy".
In the movie Gandalf vehemently opposes going through the mines. He never suggests it. But he gives the decision over to Frodo who chooses to go through the mines.
Or at least that's how it goes in the extended edition. Maybe it was different in the original release, I don't recall.
But Gandalf says in the movies that he would not go through Moria if he had any other choice, that’s why he let’s Frodo decide instead of telling Gimli why exactly he does not want to go to Moria
Gimli was still under the impression that Balin’s companions were successful in reclaiming Khazad-dum
Right, in the books Gandalf allows Aragorn to lead them over the mountains, and it almost gets everyone killed.
After that Aragorn gives in and Gandalf leads everyone through Moria. Gandalf had been through Moria before and thought they would have a better chance of slipping through there unnoticed then trying to evade all of Saruman's spies and forces on the surface (shortly before going into Moria they get attacked by a bunch of wolves that disappear after they're killed)
Gimli knows the mines had Balin's camp in them, but it's been like 25 years since anyone who heard anything from them which is a big part of why the dwarves came to Rivendell in the first place - they were hoping someone knew something. But everyone kind of silently assumes the worst, including Gimli.
"DARYL could be here" he thought. "I've never been in this mine before. There could be DARYL anywhere." The cool wind felt good against his wizard's cloak. "I hate DARYL" he thought. Frodo singing The Road Goes Ever On reverberated through the entire cave system. Making it pulsate even as the pipe weed circulated through his powerful thick veins and washed away his (merited) fear of Daryl in the mines. "With an eagle, you can go anywhere you want" he said to himself, out loud
>but he knows Daryl and evil things live there
Who's Daryl
"DARYL could be here" he thought. "I've never been in this mine before. There could be DARYL anywhere." The cool wind felt good against his wizard's cloak. "I hate DARYL" he thought. Frodo singing The Road Goes Ever On reverberated through the entire cave system. Making it pulsate even as the pipe weed circulated through his powerful thick veins and washed away his (merited) fear of Daryl in the mines. "With an eagle, you can go anywhere you want" he said to himself, out loud
Yes, that was their own fault for stopping to read some books. They could have just kept on walking and been out in under ten minutes without any fight.
I don't think it's plot armour, when the person is saved by armour they're wearing. It would only be plot armour if the mithril coat was never mentioned before that scene. We get to see Bilbo giving it to him.
Gandalf not knowing is more of a plothole. Although I suppose we can go with book and movie Gandalf DID know but was more like “frick it better than freezing our asses off”. Gandalf might’ve had a prophetic vision that going thru Moira would lead him to get his Level Up perhaps?
Balin (from the Hobbit) had sent a party to attempt to recolonize Moria within the last few decades.
Moria is obviously immense so it couldve easily lost communication depending on where they attempted to settle and dramatic increases in goblin raiding parties in the mirkwood and between the Misties and the Lonely Mountain.
Gimli explicitly mentions this.
His intention is to resync with them and get their help.
Gandalf not knowing is more of a plothole. Although I suppose we can go with book and movie Gandalf DID know but was more like “frick it better than freezing our asses off”. Gandalf might’ve had a prophetic vision that going thru Moira would lead him to get his Level Up perhaps?
Gandalf is not omniscient.
His hesitance is because obviously youre not going to retake Moria from Goblins or "whatever they found down there" super quickly, and there had been no news of Balin's success.
Its not really assured that White Gandalf is any more powerful than Gray.
He simply has the renewed confidence and assurance that God has a specific mission yet for him to accomplish.
The Wizards have some limited knowledge of their angelic status but no explicit idea of its intent or memory of their lives as Maiar.
Part of their stealth mission is also to alleviate temptation from an organized large scale army approaching mordor.
This is why the fellowship is racially egalitarian.
And while Gimli doesnt face extraordinary temptation of the ring.
The dwarves as caricatures of israelites have a long history of greed and conflict with Elves and Men over lesser treasures.
Yeah it is kind of irresponsible of Gandalf to just completely ignore Durin's Bane and never investigate it or anything for like a thousand years. Maybe he could have gone with Balin and the other dwarfs instead of just letting them die.
>Their purpose was to hold this course west of the Mountains for many miles and days. The country was much rougher and more barren than in the green vale of the Great River in Wilderland on the other side of the range, and their going would be slow; but they hoped in this way to escape the notice of unfriendly eyes. The spies of Sauron had hitherto seldom been seen in this empty country, and the paths were little known except to the people of Rivendell.
There was one near Rivendell, that's the one they take in The Hobbit, but they don't do it in LoTR because they say it's too obvious and Sauron is probably guarding it
>why did Sauron order his top Balrog to guard a random mine?
The balrog was an independent agent. It wasn't under Sauron's sway and in fact seems to have drawn the goblins of Moria under its control similar to Sauron or Sauruman's ability to do the same. But because it had no drive or ambition to dominate or any greater scheme it just used them to guard its resting place in Moria.
Why didn’t the Free People of Middle-Earth create an Centralized Allied Command Structure, which would be responsible to coordinate their military and intelligence gathering operations?
They would not only have a much clearer picture of the enemy‘s military capabilities and influence in regions outside of Mordor, but also over their own. They would be strategically able to better allocate their forces in different theaters of war. For example Rohan‘s cavalry forces could be reorganized as a mobile strike team able to achieve local force superiority for different operations. Like they did at Helm‘s Deep and Gondor.
this but actually. I don't buy any of Tolkien's deviantart-tier fanfiction retcons that Gandalf and Sauron were actually totally Angels the entire time if they're dumber than humans.
They didn't keep all their divine knowledge when they took earthly forms. They had to learn everything on their own. When Gandalf came back he even had to be reminded of what name he went by.
Deities that take forms on earth are way weaker than their ultimate forms. Rings of Powah was an absolute shitfest but one thing they got right is portraying Sauron and Gandalf as homeless bum morons for a reason.
The shit about them being "angels" is a normie interpretation of them being supernatural servants of higher beings/deities. They are drawn to the essence of the higher being that they serve, so Sauron is drawn to crave and pursue order because that was Morgoth's domain.
The wizards & balrogs are technically the same but there isn't "power levels" or whatever in LOTR, they are simply beings of the same order that have the same cosmic purpose.
The wizards were intentionally nerfed by putting them in old men's bodies so that they wouldn't be as formidable as Sauron if they went rogue. But just because Gandalf & the balrog are technically beings of the same order doesn't make them equals, let alone with Sauron. It was a miracle that Gandalf could contend with the Balrog in combat let alone slay it.
>let us go through the Mines of Moria! >my brother and his party went to reconquer it from the goblins fifty years ago and nobodies heard from them since but I'm sure they're fine!
Why was he so rarted?
>Be Sauronman >Have a pretty good idea that there's a balrog in Moria >Know that if the balrog gets the ring it's going to destroy the entire world >Force the fellowship to go through Moria anyway >Don't even guard the exit
Balrogs are weak shit and the ring doesn't do anything, the strongest balrog in history got btfoed by a guy with a viking helmet.
Safer with a balrog in a hole than in Mount Doom
soo, the gondorians just ignored the years of decades of sauron and orcs amassing huge armies and industries in mordor, they just ignored the huge ass tower with a gigantic eye on top of it??
>soo, the gondorians just ignored the years of decades of sauron and orcs amassing huge armies and industries in mordor, they just ignored the huge ass tower with a gigantic eye on top of it??
Same reason why people stick around in Gotham.
>The Changing of the World was the event in which Arda was transformed from a flat world into a round planet. It occurred in S.A. 3319[2] when Ilúvatar utterly destroyed the island of Númenor due to the deeds of its people. >After the Changing of the World, only the Elves could find the Straight Way and reach the ancient West by ship.
So how did Bilbo and Frodo go to Valinor then? Is it based on the material that the ship is made out of, like elf-wood vs man-wood?
4 months ago
Anonymous
>After the Changing of the World, only the Elves could find the Straight Way and reach the ancient West by ship.
4 months ago
Anonymous
They rode with Elves, who are in direct communication with the Ainur (high-angels or lower-gods depending on how christian you'd like to interpret them) and receive the blessing to come with them.
4 months ago
Anonymous
By the way that always bugged me that for handling the corruption of the Ring the reward is Bilbo and Frodo just get to go to Elf heaven. Sounds kinda gay tbh.
4 months ago
Anonymous
Sam gets the best of both worlds; he gets to stay in the Shire, feasting, drinking ale, smoking pipe weed and clapping Rosie's fat cheeks until he's old enough and gets bored, and gets to sail to Elf Heaven and chill with Frodo & Gandalf for eternity.
4 months ago
Anonymous
Valinor is supposedly so grand that it actually diminishes mortals more quickly.
Imagine you gotta go to grocery store and the line is out the door and the cashier is giving a lecture to the current customer and nobody cares because theyre all immortal and have all the time to waste in the world.
4 months ago
Anonymous
Elves can still see the world as flat so they can perceive the original path in a straight line. So they sail off of the curvature of the earth and into the sky.
4 months ago
Anonymous
No they lost the full extent of their far sight with the curvature of the Earth.
That is the whole point of the curvature.
Walking through the dark, eerily quiet, spooky halls of Khazadum for days on end while trying to be as quiet as possible, trying to sleep after all those miles of walking in that creepy place, would be quite the experience
I fricking love that picture for the sheer hilarity of Gandalf and Daryl fricking swinging at each other for miles and just being left alone. Like there were just thousands of orcs and goblins watching them go at it for miles, for days and days. They fought their way up a fricking twenty mile high staircase for gods sake. >be Nurgbag >been trying to get some sleep after eating a lovely rat >wizard and demon are still fighting >it's been a week, they're a few floors above now but everything echoes in this fricking mine >you put the grog bag over your head to drown in out >hear "the dark fire shall not avail you" followed by a roar for the 8th time today >hear something about someone named Peregrin Took >sounds like he's in for it too >hope they both die >gets stabbed by Lurgbog for the grog bag >fricking die
Imagine being a timeless lovecraftian monster at the center of the earth and suddenly a wizard and a demon fall out of the sky and start sword fighting
*spits down the pit*
Guys I think something's burning down there... Aw shit, it's Daryl! Act cool.
Uh, hi, Daryl. Been eating any, uh, goblin shit lately?
Ugh, these windy tunnels are unbearable! Good thing I brought a whole huge bag of elven wind chimes with me. But where is it? I placed it on the ring of this well right here just a moment ago! Hmmm, but since there are no black people here, that could only mean... ZOINK GANDALF!
sam and frodo weren't gay you moron holy shit please return to /misc/
4 months ago
Anonymous
both left and right agree they were gay
they were just too close to be friends
4 months ago
Anonymous
no.
tolkein came from a different time. sorry you've never had close friends before. yeah, you can make fun of their exchanges because they're sappy but they were going to hell and back
you think every soldier in WW1 was gangbanging each other to pass the time in the trenches
i think tolkeins anti-industrialism was directly because of what he experienced in WW1, too, which makes sense, as that war was a horrorshow
...and what purpose does nature have?
we already created artificial trees, they are tiny, create more oxygen and are simply more efficient. At this rate we can get rid of nature and replace it with an artificial nature that's more efficient.
Consider this, we can finally create mega cities can occupy entire continents by getting rid of all the unnecessary trees, which would also get rid of all the insects, bugs, birds and other pests.
Not that anon but mind broken morons like you who think the world should be destroyed in service of humans living like chickens in battery cages need to be taken to the woods and shot. Dont @ me.
4 months ago
Anonymous
Efficiency is more important than some instagram-tier meme like forests and lakes, anon.
Why couldn't Saruman wait like 5 more minutes to turn evil? >You found the One Ring? A hobbit has it? Let's go meet him right away, we'll take the eagles.
During the third age we’re the Valar less powerful then in the first age? They seem to have to use less magic over time. As they start out lighting the world with the two lamps and then the trees of valinor and then the sun and moon. They were able to create the trees of arda but after melkor destroyed them, the Valar were not able to just make new versions. They like morgoth seem to have lost power over time but the vale lost it slower as they were not acting to corrupt and twist the world. So by the third age the Valar are less present in the world. They send over the istari and that’s mostly it. Valinor is now not present in the world. It seems that at this point that the Valar might not be able to travel to middle earth anymore. And even if they did they liekly would not be nearly as powerful as they once were. So some thinking that the Valar could just come to middle earth and beat sauron are wrong. For one since valinor is in a different plane of existence seems to imply the Valar cannot go back to middle earth. And second the Valar are not very powerful anymore.
Common theme across fiction and theology.
As concepts evolve, they become more complex, but less powerful.
They lose their strengths as new concepts come into formation, so on and so forth.
We generally refer to this as "The God(s) of The Gap."
For each thing you understand, you are making God(s) weaker and for everything you don't understand stronger.
As with all religions outside of Abrahamic israelite bullshit, this eventually comes with the death of the concepts entirely as the new concepts come forth.
Citations for this in Greek/Roman/Mesopotamian/Norse/Egyptian mythology and i'm sure to some degree in asian, american mythologies.
Hell even Jesus is a degree of this, but fricking israelite religions have to like an angry child play their "NOO MY GOD BEST" card.
the valar are just as powerful, and are eternally powerful
they are just tired of constantly watching the things they love and created get constantly destroyed by melkor and sauron, and worse would be causing that destruction themselves
this is why they dont come over and curb stomp the guy, the weakest valar could demolish sauron but he might take an entire region of the world with him during the fight
the trees and the silmarils are explained in the same way, its impossible to make the same crafts the exact same way multiple times, if you destroyed the silmarils to revive the trees there would never again be silmarils, only lesser copies
and freeze off MY ASS
>provides food, clothing, shelter and purpose to thousands of confused young males
Why is he "bad" again?
What's his tax policy on the raping pits?
I want to rape liv tyler's pits
He's Sauron's man (husband)
He's literally named Sauron-man.
>young males
Motherfricker, these things came out of sludge and dirt by being bred between disgusting creatures.
So Americans?
Cool it with the racist remarks!
>made from shit
>are shit
What did Tolkien mean by this?
>males
That's why. Men deserve nothing but torment and pain. Get it through your thick skull already filthy maloid.
Where are the female orcs?
Who the frick needs two different sizes of fork?
>salad fork
>dinner fork
Savages. All of you.
Ones an uruk and the other is uruk hai.
This is a changes in the movies that does piss me off.
Gandalf suggesting to go through moria shows gandalf is not always in the right and even he and aragorn, two noble paragons, can squabble and have petty arguments.
Likewise, Gimlis reaction to Moria in the books is a mix of fear and wonder. It's the place of his ancestors but he knows Daryl and evil things live there. He's extremely conflicted.
They went with Gimlis being the jar jar binks of the group instead.
>but he knows Daryl and evil things live there
Who's Daryl
That's the balrogs name.
Daryl the balrogs.
>HURRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
>MEEE SO FUNEEEEE!!!!!
Fricking GO BACK you stupid morons. Jesus Christ.
Next time proofread your phonepost if you don't want people to make jokes about a funny autocorrect.
It's not my fricking post, I'm just sick of how moronic you shitheads are. Go. Back.
Some of us want to read the thread without having to sift through a ton of midwit derailing posts.
why did his phone autocorrect to Daryl though?
Is Daryl his wife's boyfriend?
It wasn't autocorrect, he's just privy to esoteric knowledge.
>privy to esoteric knowledge
did he get that knowledge from his wife's boyfriend?
SHUT THE DUCK UP YOU BIGGER FLAG!
>t. daryl
>ARKARKARKARK!
>proceeds to beat dead horse into ground.
Plebbit misses you. Go back.
i didn't know they had reddit down in the deep dark. how's moria, daryl?
YSNP
YWABADaryl
Daryl apologist detected
do people not know the balrog's name is Daryl?
>do people not know the balrog's name is Daryl?
Larry do.
>a darylog of morgoth
I think he tried to write dark, and it autocorrected to Daryl.
Ugly pig.
Cute pig.
Fat disgusting PIG
daryl's the crackhead who hangs out around the moria 7-11. believe it or not, gandalf owes him money for a dimebag
I know Daryl ends up in France canonically, but this is too far.
Daryl is Middle Earth's black guy.
What was the alternative to Moria? Name one that doesn't involve all of them dying.
The movie showed the alternative. They tried the alternative (the snowy mountain), and only when it failed, did they go through the mines.
The alternative to both of those would be to go south of the mountains and straight to Isenberg
>Isenberg
They needed to let Gandalf cook, lol.
The eagles
The ring would corrupt the eagles.
no one said to let the eagle wear the ring
genius, we all know Boromir also wasn't influenced by it because he never put it on
Boromir took months just to be influenced, and he had to know the ring was there.
Eagles take like 15 seconds to fly to Mordor, and you don't have to tell them you're carrying a magical ring of power just tell them it's confidential
The eagles have essentially magic receptors that are a perfect match for the ring and it would corrupt them almost instantly. They know this so they stay away.
sounds like bullshit cope for why the eagles didn't fly them to Mordor
Would you understand if a recovering meth addict didn't want to help deliver a large quantity of crystal to the police department?
Balrog didn't give a frick about the ring and he's a literal energy being, this whole "muh eagles are addicted to evil powers" thing seems like something you pulled out of your ass
The Ring shut the frick up and quieted down in Moria. It didn't want to be claimed by the Balrog.
Why was it chasing them? Just cause of Gandalf?
The balrog who.... attacked them? Or a different balrog who was not mentioned because it didnt show up because it didnt give a shit?
>muh small objects falling down a well
Pippin might have woken up but let me remind you vast sections of moria are in RUIN and things fall and go bump. There is also no way the vast depths are entirely silent on their own. Even if the balrog was sleeping, it was scanning for Morgoth, and therefore set to receive magical feelings or whatever you call it. I think the ring called out to it, and made it feel rageful about the transgression, so that it would come kill the powerful ones while the weak ones snuck away in a state of uncontrollable fear.
Like if it were really just waiting for Morgoth with no interfering motives or forces acting upon it, then it would be sorting all events into one of two categories: Morgoth, or Not Morgoth. A bone or rock falling and making a thud goes into Not Morgoth and per the definition of "waiting for Morgoth" it would not have pursued it.
So I think the ring basically reached out and made it mad. Cooked the balrog the whole time it was in its sphere of influence, to be pissed when it was disturbed.
No they don’t lol, that’s fanfic shit you made up, and it won’t corrupt shit. It couldn’t corrupt Gandalf for months from afar and it couldn’t corrupt eagles in the 15 seconds they would take to drop it in the volcano
the eagles are extremely prideful so are very vulnerable to the ring
the eagles would've been intercepted by the nazgul riding wyrms. the eagles were still suffering from casualties in the war of the 5 armies and trying to repopulate so fighting unkillable wyrmriders was not on their list of things to do
Aragorn thwarted them with a fricking torch. They could just wear magical flaming helmets and be fine.
they came back, anon. plus, the witch king wasn't there. the eagles would've had all of mordor's attention, his included
Flaming. Magical. Helmets.
And how many months did it take for the group that attacked Isildur?
>Eagles take like 15 seconds to fly to Mordor,
>15 seconds
fricking. moron.
They can perform sub-orbital flights naturally.
The same eagles who got attacked by the flying Nazgul at the end? Because Sauron doesn't have ANY air support, right? Fricking. morons.
Felbeasts are so frail that Legolas killed one in one shot and one of them got decapitated by a woman with a sword.
get the eagles to fly over or take the route bilbo took or just tough it out through the cold
why didn't Gandalf just sing for the snow to stop? Saruman literally sang a fricking thunderstorm to kill them
Cos Gandalf was a shitter until he got his zenkai boost.
Saruman just sang to wake up the mountain Redhorn. Redhorn was itself malicious and hated people. Gandalf couldn't have done shit.
how the frick does a mountain hate people
explain this tolkeingays
Mountains and rivers and trees have intelligence, they're like spirits. Like how Tom Bombadill's wife Goldberry is the daughter of the river running through that land.
Nah it's Redhorn itself, and the spell Saruman casts is just him saying "WAKE UP REDHORN".
Someone fricked a river?
>Like how Tom Bombadill's wife Goldberry is the daughter of the river running through that land
>mfw Tolkien was hindupilled
lalalalalalala I’m in love with lovely Tommy
just read this mythology, very uncanny similarity to a chinese myth, Chang'e the moon goddess "stealing the elicir of immortality" from a similar sun/ archer god Yi
here's a sorta gay song about it https://youtu.be/cxe3V-06UAU
It was raised by Melkor when he first came to earth, since then evil things keeps spawning in there in the dark. Gandalf himself claims he saw a lot of nameless thing when he was pursuing the Balrog in its ancient corridors
only Gimli thought that, because Gimli's a stupid dwarf. Gandalf corrected him that it was actually Sauronman doing it.
where the frick does daryl come in then?
daryl was hiding inside the mine because the snow outside would put out his fire
Flying over them on the eagles
Send a decoy fellowship through the Gap of Rohan, and then while Sauronman is distracted take redhorn pass
hit up eru and have him send in one of these bad boys from real earth
Just go through Gondor
they'd have been held up and the ring seized by that fat cuck steward Denethor, dooming middle earth.
did you miss half the plot where the ring holds far more control over man than the other races and where Gondor royalty specifically has a really bad habit of succumbing to it?
Faramir didn't didn't give a shit about the ring though
Yeah but Father'smean had daddy issues consuming him
Daddy issues ironically saved him. Father'smean was too much like Dementedoor in reference their natural high mental defenses. Bore-on-here was fricked because the favorite is always coddled to hell.
Denethor is not Gondor royalty, that's the fricking thing
that's not exactly increasing my hopes for the ring making it safely through gondor. in fact that's what I meant in the first place, a corrupt typical human man is in charge of Gondor.
Gondor itself is teeming with orcs, is literally being occupied by orcs led by the nazghul with t he express purpose of intercepting the ring and blockading gondor as the ring barely manages to slip through it by sheer luck
the line of stewards is loosely related to the same line as that of the kings, they have a small amount of royal blood but none of them try and get uppity because they know the people would just slap them down
By the third age, the lands south of Eriador are unpopulated grasslands. We know Sauron uses birds as spies, and the ringwraiths will come back as a problem. The fellowship would have been spotted and destroyed along the way. Recall that the objective is to sneak into Mordor while Sauron expects the ring to go to Gondor where it can be used to challenge him.
>the ringwraiths
Complete jobbers. Aragorn on his own managed to drive off seven of them at the Weathertop. With the entire fellowship they could easily take on 100 of them.
Yeah but why wouldn't they send the witch king if sauron saw gandalf & co in the grasslands?
Fellowship doesn't have any women so Witch King would be invincible against them
>just go through where humans are barely holding against the orcish hordes
The ring would corrupt its computers.
Western Gondor is mostly safe i believe
There options:
Continue over the mountains, which they probably could've done, and wouldve been ultimately much much easier than Moria.
Or head for the gap of Rohan and risk Saruman's orc scouts (but encounter the ent husbands earlier)
Or.
Head for the Gray Havens with a company of elves, including GLORFINDEL WHO WAS AT THE COUNCIL AND HAS FRICKING FOUGHT AND DEFEATED A BALROG PERSONALLY and sale around the southern edge of the map to Gondor with a navy.
This is allegedly more close to what Sauron was expecting, actually he expected them more to send the Ring to Valinor, but in general for there to be a full host.
The Fellowships intent was stealth, but that stealth doesnt make too much in the grand scheme when Sauron already knows of the Ring's presence and general location (Rivendell).
Heading east with a small band was successfully a surprise, but unimaginably risky.
Have Tom Bombadil dance a merry fricking dance and somehow the snow would turn to marshmallows and they’d ski down it like the cool motherfrickers that they are.
Tom doesn't have any power outside his own realm
He could yeet the ring into mount Doom from where he is.
he's too busy talking to trees and fricking his wife to care
give the ring to dumbledore and expecto patronus sauron
There, the alternative.
Am I literally the only able to think outside the box? JRR Hackien was a hack for making the map in such a way that this was possible.
You havent read the thread.
There have been plenty of suggestions.
We can do this all day long.
What?
Will Denethor somehow send spies on an Elvish ship? Or Sauron?
What if there's a giant squid under Sauron's control? You want The Fellowship to end up like in them Japanese hentais?
The creature in the lake outside the secret moria entrance was not allied with Sauron, just an intelligent and malevolent power like the Balrog.
tbqhwy the powerful and sentient unknowns out there are possibly worse than any creature under Sauron's control. The ring would have ultimately betrayed them, but two dark lords at the same time when only one underpowered one is kicking their asses would be devestating.
>Daryl apologist detected
There needs to be more Daryl apologists really. Dude was minding his own business when the outside world dropped in on him.
Literally already suggested in the thread.
Nobody is arguing against these options.
Merely explaining that the Fellowships objective was an incredibly risky stealth gambit, attempting to avoid high level political strife and temptation.
They probably should have taken Glorfindel with them though.
His presence alone scares off the Black riders, but that was consider too high profile.
>They probably should have taken Glorfindel with them though.
He was nerfed into being a wamen into the films though (would have happened even without him being replaced with Arwen), which would have made for its own unique set of challenges for such a mission of adventurers.
Gandalf and Frodo stop being procrastinating tards and take the ring earlier in the year. Then they can pass over the mountains in the summer instead of the dead of winter
The secrecy of the mission is paramount
Frodo’s selling and leaving Bag End is a very elaborate plot for the Hobbits
Yeah but they still were trying to go over the mountain and couldn't because of the snow. If they'd went a few months earlier, it would have been fine
It was thwarted by the betrayal of saruman and gollum leaking information
Things beyond their control
They behaved rationally despite their risky gambit
Fricking newbies not knowing a literal river to the sea runs right through Rivendell.
They could of turned a fricking multi month-year travel into a few weeks.
there are pirates and sea monsters and their closest port near morder puts them in gondor, a place they dont want to go to because of ambitious men and looking out of place, which defeats the point of a secret mission
They can't devote 20 minutes of screentime to the characters giving complex arguments over which route to take.
all they had to do was to rewrite the dialogue so it isn't moronic
it took like 6 mins just for the lighting the beacons montage in ROTK
Gimlis portrayal was abysmal. The acting was fine, but they turned the character into a clown. It's pretty egregious in TTT and RotK.
That an Alan Lee pic? Never seen it before.
>Alan Lee
idk, I got it on Cinemaphile
>AUUUUUGH Gandalf you rat! You weren’t buying time for the Fellowship to escape, you were planning to give me the ol’ three day battle! How could you give a fellow Maiar the ol’ three day battle??
I wonder if they had a mob of goblins following them watching the fight and eating popcorn the whole way
You gotta figure a spicy keychain by Balrog would kinda sting too?
what if red guy was balrog?
Because of Gimli I do not rewatch the extended editions of TT and ROTK
Just pure cringe
As opposed to having 0 characterisation in the book? The one thing the films did, especially the hobbit was give distinguishing characterisations to tolkien's litany of oin, gloin, groin, bori, bofi, sloppy, toppy, beebo, booba, merry, murray, pippa, poopa
>Daryl and evil things live there
>Gandalf suggesting to go through moria shows gandalf is not always in the right
If they hadn't gone through Moria, and Gollum hadn't started following them, Sauron would have ended up with the ring after Frodo failed to destroy it. Or maybe they would never have made it into Mordor without Gollum in the first place, and they would have all died defending Minas Tirith.
Gollum would've found them anyway, wasn't he following them before Moria? Gandalf mentions him following them for a while in the first movie.
>The acting was fine, but they turned the character into a clown.
That's pretty much all he was in the books as well. Pretty much every line he has after moria is delivered in a comdecy style/for comedic relief.
>Banter with Legolas over who killed more orcs in Helm's deep
>Banter with Merry & Pippin that they owe him for the wild 3 hunters goose chase
>Banter with Pippin about how hthe hobbit would've been iced at the towers of the teeth if he didn't jump in amd save him
>Banter with Eomer about how he'll axe anyone who says Galadriel isn't the fairest woman alive
>General banter for the entirety of the books as he interacts with Legolas and they become friends
Gimli was a comedic character the entirety of the books- the movies just turned it up a little bit so the jokes would land for a mondern audience and because they had Rhys Davies
Finally someone recognizes this.
Yes people, we get it. The LoTR movies were a bit goofy at times. Merry and Pippin were way too clownish even after they "stepped up".
The Legolas oliphaunt scene was also fricking dumb at the time, youre not bringing anything new to the table there either
But if you werent all 17 year old shitkids, you would have understood the literal roars of approval in theaters when we saw that the first time. These movies had Gravity, that means you could get away with silly stuff at times for levity so that the non-diehard fans wouldnt get bored.
All three movies are literally perfect, flaws and all. Thats not a contradiction
>All three movies are literally perfect
i didnt see a single POC in them, how could they be perfect?
that problem only occurred in the second and third Hobbit movies
The Witch King was a maori guy though
Agreed. I was something like 12 when Two Towers came out and distinctly remember how cool we thought Legolas' action sequences had been in the first 2 films and how me and my friends would speculate on what epic move they would have him do in RoTK. They delivered with the Oliphaunt move.
Sure as an adult its over the top and too goofy, but frick that I wasn't an adult when the movies came out.
This guy gets it. You simply cannot get a 1:1 translation of a book, let alone LOTR, to the fricking screen. So many normie morons alone cried about "too many endings". We're LUCKY we didn't get studio meddling to the same degree as The Hobbit with their beardless "Twilight-sexy" dwarves in love triangles with elves. I'll fricking take Gimli's relatively few antics any day over what they did to The Hobbit "trilogy".
>That's pretty much all he was in the books as well.
It's okay to admit you never read them.
I wish the films shed more light on Daryl like the books.
>character lives in a vast dark cave
>Tolkien: “Hmm, dark, dar, Daryl! That’s what the beast shall be named”
Why is he such a hack?
Daryl
Daryl is his unassuming roommate.
Nice
In the movie Gandalf vehemently opposes going through the mines. He never suggests it. But he gives the decision over to Frodo who chooses to go through the mines.
Or at least that's how it goes in the extended edition. Maybe it was different in the original release, I don't recall.
And in the book it was his idea to begin with which Aragorn opposed. That's the entire point of anon's post.
Daryl just wanted to chill in the depths man, why did they have to treat him like the bad guy?
>but he knows Daryl
Whomst?
But Gandalf says in the movies that he would not go through Moria if he had any other choice, that’s why he let’s Frodo decide instead of telling Gimli why exactly he does not want to go to Moria
Gimli was still under the impression that Balin’s companions were successful in reclaiming Khazad-dum
Right, in the books Gandalf allows Aragorn to lead them over the mountains, and it almost gets everyone killed.
After that Aragorn gives in and Gandalf leads everyone through Moria. Gandalf had been through Moria before and thought they would have a better chance of slipping through there unnoticed then trying to evade all of Saruman's spies and forces on the surface (shortly before going into Moria they get attacked by a bunch of wolves that disappear after they're killed)
Gimli knows the mines had Balin's camp in them, but it's been like 25 years since anyone who heard anything from them which is a big part of why the dwarves came to Rivendell in the first place - they were hoping someone knew something. But everyone kind of silently assumes the worst, including Gimli.
>Daryl and evil things live there
Why did they give the big goblin a scrotum chin
its because jackson is a hack
to make him icky and gross
To make him look like my old teacher, Cindy Beange from Sudbury. Frick you Cindy you old c**t
The idea of a character named Daryl existing in Tolkiens world is unironically hilarious.
Holy frick im literally crying in bed in the dark
Is Daryl the guy who collects the cave toll?
"DARYL could be here" he thought. "I've never been in this mine before. There could be DARYL anywhere." The cool wind felt good against his wizard's cloak. "I hate DARYL" he thought. Frodo singing The Road Goes Ever On reverberated through the entire cave system. Making it pulsate even as the pipe weed circulated through his powerful thick veins and washed away his (merited) fear of Daryl in the mines. "With an eagle, you can go anywhere you want" he said to himself, out loud
bless you, laddie
>With an eagle, you can go anywhere you want
Why didn't they just go to Mordor?
Eagles were nerfed. -5 range spell from Sauron.
11/10
Moria really wasn't that bad. They made it the whole way through fine and were right at the exit when they stirred up trouble.
>They made it the whole way through fine
What...? What about
>They have a cave troll.
Yes, that was their own fault for stopping to read some books. They could have just kept on walking and been out in under ten minutes without any fight.
thanks to frodo's literal plot armor
I don't think it's plot armour, when the person is saved by armour they're wearing. It would only be plot armour if the mithril coat was never mentioned before that scene. We get to see Bilbo giving it to him.
How did this homie NOT know what had happened to Moria? It had been like five centuries.
Gandalf not knowing is more of a plothole. Although I suppose we can go with book and movie Gandalf DID know but was more like “frick it better than freezing our asses off”. Gandalf might’ve had a prophetic vision that going thru Moira would lead him to get his Level Up perhaps?
Balin (from the Hobbit) had sent a party to attempt to recolonize Moria within the last few decades.
Moria is obviously immense so it couldve easily lost communication depending on where they attempted to settle and dramatic increases in goblin raiding parties in the mirkwood and between the Misties and the Lonely Mountain.
Gimli explicitly mentions this.
His intention is to resync with them and get their help.
Gandalf is not omniscient.
His hesitance is because obviously youre not going to retake Moria from Goblins or "whatever they found down there" super quickly, and there had been no news of Balin's success.
Gandalf is not omniscient.
How differently would things have gone for the Fellowship if the dwarfs had retaken Moria?
Its not really assured that White Gandalf is any more powerful than Gray.
He simply has the renewed confidence and assurance that God has a specific mission yet for him to accomplish.
The Wizards have some limited knowledge of their angelic status but no explicit idea of its intent or memory of their lives as Maiar.
Part of their stealth mission is also to alleviate temptation from an organized large scale army approaching mordor.
This is why the fellowship is racially egalitarian.
And while Gimli doesnt face extraordinary temptation of the ring.
The dwarves as caricatures of israelites have a long history of greed and conflict with Elves and Men over lesser treasures.
Yeah it is kind of irresponsible of Gandalf to just completely ignore Durin's Bane and never investigate it or anything for like a thousand years. Maybe he could have gone with Balin and the other dwarfs instead of just letting them die.
Do you mean Daryl's Basement?
Is there really no path over the mountain near Rivendell? You'd think the Elves would go across regularly.
>Their purpose was to hold this course west of the Mountains for many miles and days. The country was much rougher and more barren than in the green vale of the Great River in Wilderland on the other side of the range, and their going would be slow; but they hoped in this way to escape the notice of unfriendly eyes. The spies of Sauron had hitherto seldom been seen in this empty country, and the paths were little known except to the people of Rivendell.
Why not sail down Anduin?
There was one near Rivendell, that's the one they take in The Hobbit, but they don't do it in LoTR because they say it's too obvious and Sauron is probably guarding it
How did Gollum get in the mines if the door collapsed right in front of them?
He was already down there, he started trailing them in Moria
he probably sneaked in through a poop shoot.
Better question, why did Sauron order his top Balrog to guard a random mine?
Balrogs don't answer to Sauron. They're Morgoth's dudes.
>Only bridge towards the east gate
>Really narrow
lmao
>why did Sauron order his top Balrog to guard a random mine?
The balrog was an independent agent. It wasn't under Sauron's sway and in fact seems to have drawn the goblins of Moria under its control similar to Sauron or Sauruman's ability to do the same. But because it had no drive or ambition to dominate or any greater scheme it just used them to guard its resting place in Moria.
>giant labyrinth the size of texas
>just happen to bump into gollum and a balrog
bravo tolkeen
What do the Moria Orcs eat?
The Balrog was just ancaping away in Moria. He didn't have ties with Mordor
Probably rank higher in general terms of power than Sauron(post Isildur) but have no earthly ambitions to rule
>Balrog just wanted to be left alone
>Dwarves violated the NAP
>Fellowship dragged the screeching goblin hordes around his neet cave
>random mine
LET US GO THROUGH THE MINORS OF MORIA
>Daryl Isenberg stops the gang
Why didn’t the Free People of Middle-Earth create an Centralized Allied Command Structure, which would be responsible to coordinate their military and intelligence gathering operations?
They would not only have a much clearer picture of the enemy‘s military capabilities and influence in regions outside of Mordor, but also over their own. They would be strategically able to better allocate their forces in different theaters of war. For example Rohan‘s cavalry forces could be reorganized as a mobile strike team able to achieve local force superiority for different operations. Like they did at Helm‘s Deep and Gondor.
Why didn't they just invent airplanes and nukes and tanks?
this but actually. I don't buy any of Tolkien's deviantart-tier fanfiction retcons that Gandalf and Sauron were actually totally Angels the entire time if they're dumber than humans.
They didn't keep all their divine knowledge when they took earthly forms. They had to learn everything on their own. When Gandalf came back he even had to be reminded of what name he went by.
Deities that take forms on earth are way weaker than their ultimate forms. Rings of Powah was an absolute shitfest but one thing they got right is portraying Sauron and Gandalf as homeless bum morons for a reason.
The shit about them being "angels" is a normie interpretation of them being supernatural servants of higher beings/deities. They are drawn to the essence of the higher being that they serve, so Sauron is drawn to crave and pursue order because that was Morgoth's domain.
The wizards & balrogs are technically the same but there isn't "power levels" or whatever in LOTR, they are simply beings of the same order that have the same cosmic purpose.
The wizards were intentionally nerfed by putting them in old men's bodies so that they wouldn't be as formidable as Sauron if they went rogue. But just because Gandalf & the balrog are technically beings of the same order doesn't make them equals, let alone with Sauron. It was a miracle that Gandalf could contend with the Balrog in combat let alone slay it.
I already have a garden moron
too soon to mention tunnels
Definitely happened.
>let us go through the Mines of Moria!
>my brother and his party went to reconquer it from the goblins fifty years ago and nobodies heard from them since but I'm sure they're fine!
Why was he so rarted?
DONT YOU BE FRICKIN WID DARYL!
I've met Gimli in Birmingham.
>Be Sauronman
>Have a pretty good idea that there's a balrog in Moria
>Know that if the balrog gets the ring it's going to destroy the entire world
>Force the fellowship to go through Moria anyway
>Don't even guard the exit
Balrogs are weak shit and the ring doesn't do anything, the strongest balrog in history got btfoed by a guy with a viking helmet.
Safer with a balrog in a hole than in Mount Doom
Gandalf shit himself when he realized there was a Balrog.
Gandalf is weak shit too and was scared of trolls.
That same Balrog got btfo by falling into some water.
Gandalf shits himself regardless if there’s danger or not. He’s literally homeless druggie Merlin.
>Gandalf shit himself
>Gandalf shits himself regardless
Why do you think he wears a robe?
To hide his love handles.
>the strongest balrog in history got btfoed by a guy with a viking helmet.
And Sauron got btfo by a big dog and a girl who was good at singing
huan was big enough for luthien to ride on and slew the greatest werewolf to ever live. He was also immortal and basically protected by prophecy
You forgot to mention that the dude wearing the helmet had his arms cut off and headbutting the Valrog with the helmet spike was all he could do lol
thats a lot of cum gibli
idk why I laughed so hard at the op image being thumbnail sized
it's highly kekworthy, but some anons don't like it.
i hate that they turned gimli into a comic relief character, its pretty much my only complain about the LOTR trilogy... well that and spooky ghosts
what was the relationship between the balrog and the watcher?
sexual
soo, the gondorians just ignored the years of decades of sauron and orcs amassing huge armies and industries in mordor, they just ignored the huge ass tower with a gigantic eye on top of it??
>soo, the gondorians just ignored the years of decades of sauron and orcs amassing huge armies and industries in mordor, they just ignored the huge ass tower with a gigantic eye on top of it??
Same reason why people stick around in Gotham.
The balrogs name is really Daryl? That is so fricking funny
Yeah, but it's pronounced da-REEL.
why didn't they just go this way?
Sauron had giant sea monsters patrolling the shores
Middle Earth was still flat during the Third Age so circumnavigation wasn't an option
>Middle Earth was still flat during the Third Age so circumnavigation wasn't an option
This is incorrect.
Middle Earth was rounded in the Second Age.
Boats still went to Valinor when they sailed west though
>The Changing of the World was the event in which Arda was transformed from a flat world into a round planet. It occurred in S.A. 3319[2] when Ilúvatar utterly destroyed the island of Númenor due to the deeds of its people.
>After the Changing of the World, only the Elves could find the Straight Way and reach the ancient West by ship.
So how did Bilbo and Frodo go to Valinor then? Is it based on the material that the ship is made out of, like elf-wood vs man-wood?
>After the Changing of the World, only the Elves could find the Straight Way and reach the ancient West by ship.
They rode with Elves, who are in direct communication with the Ainur (high-angels or lower-gods depending on how christian you'd like to interpret them) and receive the blessing to come with them.
By the way that always bugged me that for handling the corruption of the Ring the reward is Bilbo and Frodo just get to go to Elf heaven. Sounds kinda gay tbh.
Sam gets the best of both worlds; he gets to stay in the Shire, feasting, drinking ale, smoking pipe weed and clapping Rosie's fat cheeks until he's old enough and gets bored, and gets to sail to Elf Heaven and chill with Frodo & Gandalf for eternity.
Valinor is supposedly so grand that it actually diminishes mortals more quickly.
Imagine you gotta go to grocery store and the line is out the door and the cashier is giving a lecture to the current customer and nobody cares because theyre all immortal and have all the time to waste in the world.
Elves can still see the world as flat so they can perceive the original path in a straight line. So they sail off of the curvature of the earth and into the sky.
No they lost the full extent of their far sight with the curvature of the Earth.
That is the whole point of the curvature.
how does Shelob sting Frodo if Frodo is wearing mythril?
there are gaps if you're stabbing with something pointy enough
she stabs himin the penis
it's Shelob.
because peter jackson forgot.
hi guys daryl here
don't come to my basement
i have evil here
>excerpt from a letter written to Morgoth in, Third Age year 2000, Silmarillion
>Fantasy world inhabited by literal god-wizards
>No teleport function
ISHYGDDT
Watch out Gandalf, there's a step!
Oh... oh, he's gone. Right into the pit.
So these are the mines of Moria, huh? I hope there are no goblins in here. I SAID I HOPE THERE ARE NO GOBLINS IN HERE HERE HERE
Walking through the dark, eerily quiet, spooky halls of Khazadum for days on end while trying to be as quiet as possible, trying to sleep after all those miles of walking in that creepy place, would be quite the experience
Sorta like throwing a sausage down the hallway or fricking your mom.
Moria is by far the best part of the fellowship book
I fricking love that picture for the sheer hilarity of Gandalf and Daryl fricking swinging at each other for miles and just being left alone. Like there were just thousands of orcs and goblins watching them go at it for miles, for days and days. They fought their way up a fricking twenty mile high staircase for gods sake.
>be Nurgbag
>been trying to get some sleep after eating a lovely rat
>wizard and demon are still fighting
>it's been a week, they're a few floors above now but everything echoes in this fricking mine
>you put the grog bag over your head to drown in out
>hear "the dark fire shall not avail you" followed by a roar for the 8th time today
>hear something about someone named Peregrin Took
>sounds like he's in for it too
>hope they both die
>gets stabbed by Lurgbog for the grog bag
>fricking die
Imagine being a timeless lovecraftian monster at the center of the earth and suddenly a wizard and a demon fall out of the sky and start sword fighting
*spits down the pit*
Guys I think something's burning down there... Aw shit, it's Daryl! Act cool.
Uh, hi, Daryl. Been eating any, uh, goblin shit lately?
Ugh, these windy tunnels are unbearable! Good thing I brought a whole huge bag of elven wind chimes with me. But where is it? I placed it on the ring of this well right here just a moment ago! Hmmm, but since there are no black people here, that could only mean... ZOINK GANDALF!
Was Gríma an incel?
If Eowyn had just thrown him a crumb of pussy, he'd have remained loyal to Rohan and never helped Saruman
Why do you think the ladies called him Wormtongue?
Probably from eating ass
I never really saw Saruman as a villain, just as a very ambitious and respectable businessman who wanted to industrialize the middle earth.
I didn't understand how someone could see him as a villain until I read about Tolkien and found out he was a hippie communist who worshipped Israel
... is this bait or do you genuinely believe this?
i can't tell with you "people" anymore
Tolkien was very openly anti-progress and hated industrialization
and?
we've seen where "progress" has gotten us
Communist progressiveness, not capitalist one.
Tolkien was pro-LGBT (see Sam and Frollo) stuff and opposed true progress.
sam and frodo weren't gay you moron holy shit please return to /misc/
both left and right agree they were gay
they were just too close to be friends
no.
tolkein came from a different time. sorry you've never had close friends before. yeah, you can make fun of their exchanges because they're sappy but they were going to hell and back
you think every soldier in WW1 was gangbanging each other to pass the time in the trenches
i think tolkeins anti-industrialism was directly because of what he experienced in WW1, too, which makes sense, as that war was a horrorshow
>nooo you can't oppose destroying nature just to fuel the spic-nig cycle! That's communism!
The absolute state of conservaBlack folk
...and what purpose does nature have?
we already created artificial trees, they are tiny, create more oxygen and are simply more efficient. At this rate we can get rid of nature and replace it with an artificial nature that's more efficient.
Consider this, we can finally create mega cities can occupy entire continents by getting rid of all the unnecessary trees, which would also get rid of all the insects, bugs, birds and other pests.
Not that anon but mind broken morons like you who think the world should be destroyed in service of humans living like chickens in battery cages need to be taken to the woods and shot. Dont @ me.
Efficiency is more important than some instagram-tier meme like forests and lakes, anon.
oh i see you're baiting. Godspeed anon.
You will never be white (and that's a good thing)
I have to go to goddamn SteamVR to see fireflies now because of people like you. I haven't even seen lovebugs in two years.
nobody wants damn bugs anywhere, anon
Go frick yourself. I miss them.
It’s true. Pro-Palestinian people identify a lot with Sauron, orcs, etc.
Meds now
Why couldn't Saruman wait like 5 more minutes to turn evil?
>You found the One Ring? A hobbit has it? Let's go meet him right away, we'll take the eagles.
he was already know to be an untrustworthy c**t 80 years before, gandalf only goes to him because hes desperate
Peter Jackson's fanfiction doesn't count.
During the third age we’re the Valar less powerful then in the first age? They seem to have to use less magic over time. As they start out lighting the world with the two lamps and then the trees of valinor and then the sun and moon. They were able to create the trees of arda but after melkor destroyed them, the Valar were not able to just make new versions. They like morgoth seem to have lost power over time but the vale lost it slower as they were not acting to corrupt and twist the world. So by the third age the Valar are less present in the world. They send over the istari and that’s mostly it. Valinor is now not present in the world. It seems that at this point that the Valar might not be able to travel to middle earth anymore. And even if they did they liekly would not be nearly as powerful as they once were. So some thinking that the Valar could just come to middle earth and beat sauron are wrong. For one since valinor is in a different plane of existence seems to imply the Valar cannot go back to middle earth. And second the Valar are not very powerful anymore.
Common theme across fiction and theology.
As concepts evolve, they become more complex, but less powerful.
They lose their strengths as new concepts come into formation, so on and so forth.
We generally refer to this as "The God(s) of The Gap."
For each thing you understand, you are making God(s) weaker and for everything you don't understand stronger.
As with all religions outside of Abrahamic israelite bullshit, this eventually comes with the death of the concepts entirely as the new concepts come forth.
Citations for this in Greek/Roman/Mesopotamian/Norse/Egyptian mythology and i'm sure to some degree in asian, american mythologies.
Hell even Jesus is a degree of this, but fricking israelite religions have to like an angry child play their "NOO MY GOD BEST" card.
the valar are just as powerful, and are eternally powerful
they are just tired of constantly watching the things they love and created get constantly destroyed by melkor and sauron, and worse would be causing that destruction themselves
this is why they dont come over and curb stomp the guy, the weakest valar could demolish sauron but he might take an entire region of the world with him during the fight
the trees and the silmarils are explained in the same way, its impossible to make the same crafts the exact same way multiple times, if you destroyed the silmarils to revive the trees there would never again be silmarils, only lesser copies
'sup, Daryl.
>ah yes, the tombs of mor-
>what was that?
>nothing